FIRST CAME... THEN CAME... DON MARTIN'S THIRD PLUNGE INTO THE ILL-LITERARY SCENE ..and your third opportunity to become the “Fall Guy”... MAINLY... BY LEAPING AT THE CHANCE TO BUY HIS LATEST BOOK OF ALL-NEW , NEVER-BEFORE-PUBLISHED CARTOONS! ON SALE NOW AT YOUR FAVORITE BOOK STAND—OR YOURS BY MAIL FOR Soc MAD uu —_ POCKET DEPARTMENT avoress— WW _____ 850 Third Avenue eiry New York, N. ¥. 10022 zp STATE cope PLEASE SEND ME ALSO PLEASE SEND ME: o CO TheMAB Reeder The Grganization MAB [2 Greasy MAD Stuff ' [MAD Strikes Back © Like MAD 5 Three Ring MAD. cnctose: DON D inside Man The ides of MAD The Solace MAD. MARTIN 15 Utterly MAD 5 Faming aD. © Ta MAD Sampler 50c DROPS 13 GiThe Brothers MAD) The MAD Frontier 5 Don Martin Steps. Out FOR STORIES The Bedside MAD [3 MAD In Orbit Don Martin Bouness Back ence i Son of MAD 5 The Veodeo MAD 1 Dave Berg Looks At The U.S.A. T ENCLOSE B5Oc We catnt bevesponioe for cas iat al ne mata, Becks Maney Bet afsec2Gn ters Ostte hv USA, 208 10% avaNUMBER 97 SEPTEMBER 1965 "Today's “Non-Conformists’ are getting harder and herder to ret apart?” —Alfred E. Neuman WILLIAM At uns publisher Araeera. reunste editor oH Pema arf director LeowaxD mazar production Jenny or roeci9, cx sertan etociate eitors seanro J. senercan lsat miko waste feblicty soni on anno, er Moms, menann oxo suleeiptiras the sual DEPARTMENTS AGE BEFORE BOOTY DEPARTMENT "The Rooke''—A MAD TV-Satine 0-2. ..e eee cece a3 BEHIND THE ODD-BALL DEPARTMENT MAD's Modem Boliove It Or Nuts... 5 ore. BERG'S-EYE VIEW DEPARTMENT The Lighter Side Of Employees .... ores BB BLUE CHIPS OFF THE OLD BLOCK DEPARTMENT Being Rich Is Better Than A Warm Puppy ...... CANNED LAUGHTER DEPARTMENT |AMAD Look At Garbagomon ....s2e+seecsseeeseeee DON MARTIN DEPARTMENT. “AFrightful Incident”... “Qn The Desert” .. : in Am Alloy” 0210+ DOUBLE-TALK DEPARTMENT ‘What They Say... And What 1 Really Means .-....-....-..29 HEADLINE ACTS DEPARTMENT The Walt Cronkite Shove «0-00.60 -20eecceeeeeeer eee) INDIAN CORN DEPARTMENT “Cheyenne Aw{ul''—A MAD Movi Draveee 8 JOKE AND DAGGER DEPARTMENT Spy Ve. Spy .- ‘ 19, 32 Spy Vs. Spy Vs. Spy ..- we LETTERS DEPARTMENT Random Samplings Of Reader Mail . MARGINAL THINKING DEPARTMENT Drawn-Out Dramas ...1++0++= ‘ONE FOR THE ROAD DEPARTMENT ‘Load & Crash—A MAD Magazino-Satire ....-...-.--2.-..98 SQUADS RIGHT DEPARTMENT MAD Interviews A John Bich Sociely Policeman ...........43 **Various Pines Around The Magazine VITAL FEATURES CHEYENNE ‘AWFUL MOVIE SATIRE) Ps.9 BEING RICH 1S BETTER, THAN A. WARM PUPPY. MAD LOOK aT GARBAGEMEN Pg. 4 CRASH (MAGAZINE SATIRE) Pg. 23 THE ROOKS: ry sHOW SATIRE) Pg. 43 Al @ THE Fil € LIGHTER all SIDE OF ipa EMPLOYEES eq Po.3PZ oe = aa a aa RAISE IN PRICE Lam pleased so see that you are no longer the wort 23° anagizioe in the ‘word! Bill Weiner, Brons,N.¥. Your magizine has reached a new “high"| Mainly the extra five cents in price! The rest of the magazine bit the ‘Fame old law ‘Roseell Zanemer Staten Island, NY. Vl be happy to pay the 30¢ because I fully realize tat this bocet is due solely to Mgher printing eotts. Besides, where flse can you bay a doormat thae cheap? ‘Ronnie Schricbanan Philadelphia, Ps, 1 know that many people will com= plaia, bur I'm glad you raised your peice, Fa fact, T wish pac'd raise it more and imate. Then it will reack a price where 1 an no longer afford to buy it, and Tl fave a chance t@ grow up normal and healthy instead of becoming raving lua. ati like the rest of your sea Jeiry Fink (no kidding) Phaiaview N.Y. Fora nickel moro, an intelligent reader can buy "Newsweek" and gee loss more Laughs! Richard Loder Brooklyo, N.Y. ‘Like the $¢ cigar and the 73¢ baircar, the 25¢ MAD hae now ditappeared from ‘the American Scene. I, for one, am sad to Grep‘Truos ard, laws Jase because pout read everywhere that the cost of education is ging up doesn't mean you have f0 0 along with =! “ary Rl New York Giry How comme 30¢ Did you decide to stare paying your artists? Marty Franklin Merrick, N.Y. “Time” costs 40¢, “Newsweek” costs 33¢, and “Life” cons 33¢, so why shot dhe bse maging ot be now stands have a price to go with ie Ed Minch Cleveland, Ohio ‘As far 26 I'm concerned, you can. raise the price to 50¢ and I still avons buy ft ‘Mare N. Weise Laurelton, N.Y. 42.MAN SQUAMISH Your article on (3-Man Squamish” 20 stimolated the stidents of the University ‘of attberss, Caleary, that we have organe ined a team, We happen to be che only tendeferted Squamish tear in Western Canada, mainly because we are che only team in Western Canacia, and we haven'e played a game. We can't understand why ‘we have no opposition. Warren Drinaan Full Frummert Ulof Alberta, Calgary, Can. Univartty of Alberta's 43-Man Squamish Team ‘We, the men of Rensilacr Polytechnic Insitute, fave seen the meres of "43-Man, Squamish” Ta further this marvelous port, we have formes a ream (see photos iefow) aod have chatlenged the men of Harvard co prove theic athletic prowess an the Flutney. We hope cha they will be the fine tradition of len bere at Marquette, we sve organized a Squamish team, AC last ly, we have lost co Deep Brooders anit ‘one ‘Dummy, who were suspended for sporsamaalike conduct doring the exure ‘of play. Achletic Commitee Schroeder Hall Marquere University Bfilwauboe, Wi ‘worthy of the challenge and not be of fice Her. Wa ak in ou publ eter asa public challenge to chem. ‘Charles dela Moete Pesce Scheraree RPE Squamish Team Trop, NY. 43-Mon Squamish Tear ‘My faith in Mankind was shaken when {1 sayy your article claiming che invention ‘of "43-Man Squamish” I recently ax a description of the guste you claim to have iB Digest "The ular Scienc tion,” “The Red Rag, frac. ic" aad "Road And Keith § Massey HaveedeGrace, Md.(GUN OWNERS PRIMER Iam writing in reference to your “MAD Gun Owners Primer” in the June issue, I recenely caciplered a 22-year Career in, military service, through two wars, co defend your tight to print such material. Daring this military cazees, 1 had the oppertunity of spending eonsid- erable time in yarieas foreign countries, and Tam familéer with dicraroeships and ther forms af totalitarian governmest History ht shown that the dist move in forming a dieesorship is to fegitter all firearms, The nexe step ic simply to de- mand tharall fueitins be turned in leaving. addisarmed public atthe mezcy of the die+ mor. ‘The drafters of our conrinution ‘were aware of this fact, and ced enough to. provide for this right in the 2od Amendment. The Communist Party ihas che avowed purpose of disarm American Peblie. Through such wri 38 yours, their cause is greatly scrvod. T consider the righ t0 awa fireagais as ime octane in kecping Amesica free as the right ta freedom of speech. James F. Lambert Major (Ret) USAT, Phoenix, Arizona Congratulations! I oaly wish more syere being done to emphasize the brutal “ppoct of hunting whieh i 9 indicative ‘ofthe cracleythacis prevalent in our mad. fem civilization, Bileea MeArdle Broax, N.Y. 1 sand on ey consume co fown a gun, and agtee-with the aportmen Stho ‘sey thar they are. apalast aay Lew ‘which puolibits the selling of ons by fail, ond wane iestent a lie where aye fae who committed a ctime with § fem would be nutomatically charged with Skempend murder A lot of people will dlsagsee, whuch i their eight, dnd sy that {Bins should be banned becnese they Kil Nay I poiot out that om this basis, auto” mobiles should have been banned ‘ty forthe fame reaion, fore Eraser Cokasset, Maz years go. (Once agai, your sharpewitied penmen smut be congratulated, Your “Gun Onn- Gt Primer” eecvly underlined the Sted for legisiation concolling the sae and ownership af frearmn Onte a probe fem fr exposed for all 10 extmiae, ade. agate goetooy ed ox che ee {eas of the sanoriy ace more csly come by Senator Dad has painted out the dane ‘gem, but MAD has, by hmong ap- Sprouch, given voice to the necesiey for hange so that respoatible sporsien, gun fellectors and otter law abiding elzens will no longer suffer betause of the ac: tioas of daorbed sndividonls and echer ‘iolmots who eas nor obra lehal weap fons #0 avy Rep up the gned wodk Skaiph Careado Register MAD Weiters~nat frearmnst fob Viz ersfield, Cait, AHIT WITH Jack "On, The First Night Of ‘The Full Moon,” when "The Race Is Oa" I dro ‘my “Lollipops And Roses” and joia the "Wives And Lovers" rushing Javn to the store to ger the latest issue of MAD +189, "Call Me Irresponsible" Jack Jones, Hollywood, Calif. PASSION PLACE Arthemother of three, [find it disgust- ing for my childeen to ead your "Passion, Plce” Yeu are going on 1 previously. made assumption ia your judging of this ‘marvelous TV series. So you found the trashy, maybe ever the movie—bit this ic mo reicon to term the television serial as "diety” ‘Bez, Gansenoce Standish Bothell, Canada HAIRGOO MAGAZINE I showed "HairGoo Magazine” to mp sister who is 2 balrdeesser, and. she Inughed fae 20:mimares Michael Taco ne Medford, Mass. BEACH MOVIE T wat going to invite you all eo the preview of my new picture, “Besch Party Binga’—bar after weing whar you did eo "Besch Movies." I change! ray mind ‘Bobbi Shaw Please odvess all corrpondence to MAD, Dopr. 97, 850 Thid Avenue (Now York City, New York 10022 ea CT Te a) aa Cae at MONSTERS WHO SHORT OUT THE SUPPLY OF MAD AT THE NEWSSTANDS ? iF Ma 85 by Bea: GET EACH CURRENT ISSUE... MAILED DIRECT TO YOUR OHM! SUBSCRIBE TO IRFEZEICD --- AND SAVE 40¢ ON 8 ISSUES OR A BIG $2.20 ON 24 ISSUES! use coupon oF duplieste — MAD SUBSCRIPTIONS 850 Third Avenue Now York City, N.Y. 10022 ‘Your ridiculous plug was: just watt | needed 49 Jolt me Inta taking cash from my bank volt ‘whora | sooket! [just couldn't re-use! With today’s clecteying headlines, MAD's tight reading ¢ = welcome iazuletion! More power toyoul Now, Il probably get amps In my pants “walting far each issue to artive at my shock! Leno $2.01 se ene my sane o yout rR i nee AS LB (i ereoes $5.00,** Pass ante i nese on your sub- sexpton Hand mall mo he eat 20 sus @ MAD NAME. ADDRESS. cry. STATE. Zip Code. PS Ey = Sree ole PUBLIC NOTICE ‘Whats Ate Worry?” id for 28¢ sach (3 fox S08), Then, maybe saroebocy ‘would mall mooey to: MAD, Eegt.“What™-Coters™, 1Sa'Thind Avemss, ew Vor: ity, New Work W023BLUE CHIPS OFF THE OLD BLOCK DEPT. MAD, consumed with guilt, feels that it awes somethi lovable al’ Charlie Schulz, the creator af “Peanuts”. Two of his very successful books: “Happiness fs A Warm Puppy” and “i Can Use All The Friends | Can Get” were the inspira- tion for two very successful MAD satires: “Misery Is A Cold Hot Dog” and “1 Got af The Finks { Need”. So now, by way of returning the favor, and since tumabout is fair play, we are publishing the following article in hopes that it will inspire Mr. Schulz to write another successful book. Being rich is having someone else put things back where you got them from. gable jum you want Being rich is being able to afford to have Being rich is getting clathes ‘Trading Cards. you don'thave te grow into, ‘to sneak food to your deg. De ‘your nighborhaad bully takon caro af. Being rich is having all the wood you need to.build things.RICH IS A WARM PUPPY e Boing rich isnot having to change your ing parents who. clothes before you ean go out and play. ee you Gin Sona Gockice | > os ag Being rich is being allowed to playin any room ‘al the heuse, Being teh i a reward for doing some Kid has to do for nothing. even during the day in the middle of tho week. net gating single useful or pra for Christmas or your birthday.Being ich s getting brand new clahes when ways gett am ven tough you have lots of elder with the crusts eut away. ei rch’ having your ewn room, eventhough you have brother. ich is being able to lend money to al youre altcot worying about geting Itback, wing semaone to ‘your kid sister. ‘Being rich is visiting your Father's o! not warrying how you behave, Being rich is getting every Sunda 6 Newspaper that has Color Comics.Boing rich fs kn ‘one grown-up who doosn't treat yau like a stupid kid, rich is borrowing on me k's allowance and your parents never remembering it, Boing rich is getting new battories for all Being rich is having all the pets you want your toys as seon as you need them. and not having to take care of them, arents whe warry if you got hurt ich C wwing faod on yor you accidentally break something expensive, thow people abik engi. See INDIAN CORN DEPr, So. sho HS A NEW TREND IS DEVELOPING IN “WESTERN MOVIES” THESE DAYS ...A TREND WHICH IS MAKING IT HARDER THAN EVER TO TELL THE HEROES FROM THE VILLAINS. ALL OF A SUDDEN, FILM-MAKERS ARE TAKING A LONG (AND. DIFFERENT) LOOK AT THE INDIAN, AND “MOVIES ARE REDDER THAN EVER"! BUT WE'LL LET ‘YOU SEE FOR YOURSELF AS— MAD GOES TO A SCREENING OF (EVEN Le ew rN ARTIET: MORT RUCKER — WRITER: LARRY SIEGEL Of such dani Wewern Slonie as" Stagecoach ‘rachgad aeeeetn | Bl j Se ee " : peeeedl sees tees : - | don'e you! | aw Hey, Charlit oy. you Whae are you annie DEFIANT ONES STARRING: TONY & SIDNEY CURTIS POITIER ES, CHEVENNE AWFUL Soe tics eee if Se ueiar Where's rs = Richard WIDEMARK Sopts [[ Note ew we Oietorzave |] theres ane Care! BABYDOLL cant stand |) the hve leading inion rly || ca sony Sal MEANIO copcted || “anetaneata’snte creat” || “ach achat Gilbert ROLANDO Sy the | indians play crummy extras! Ricorde MENTALBLOCK sae fee Delores DEL DELORES Vieter GORY Karl MALTED AND. AND AND Patrick WAINE James STEWED Edward G. ROBINHOOD IMPORTANT HISTORICAL. NOTE: THESE MAWES ARE LIGTED IN ALPHABETICAL ORDER NECORDING TO THE INDLAM ALPHADETY“Naturally, you cant tow sexy love scenes Involving 2 i developed an adorable clean gimmick (SeCapl, Arches o expresshisove=a blackboard ‘Richarel Widemark pliye Capt. Tom Arches, and, in the inerests fe, I hired Carol Babprall .« fess From "The Carpetswcepers” and a nude layout in APlayguy Magaaine” to play tie Quaker school teachert i a4, ; Lets sce: Since "Tove you mora than I Leak, her’ ae Yau ea = Sea ahink sf you with rp every Breall sane surprising 1 568 sotingaude | Mell on independant Cauose you shouts pul 8 comnma before | What 2 sou |} urging "or Ployevy || anfat ot of viata” And since "rr inthe objective andimcthe | say we Just ee Plaveuy | at jcuad | | nominative ese, it amould ead "you and "instead forget the fi (engi | udbon Amencoa|, | of you and mo whole "to" all those sexpat ? roles you've been bit? playing raligion? jammar, a € in Penmanship an ‘Actually, Iwas as gontused making the Blm as the audience be when they see it Sometimes I have the Indians talk “Indi ~# ‘Americans double-crass Indians, Schoo! tung wba she said, “Teacher! Indians go beck to homeland | 1ll gat But boavas covoo! "For this themselves, Schoal Teacher| You eame | please don't ‘shiumpt role, | with ve to texeh children, Sehaol | call me "Sehoo! had ta make Teathar? What you say, Schaal Teachert| Teacher! I's Goocbive, OFficer of the Yellow Haiet Gooubye, Sergeant of the Foul Mauth! Goodbye, Major of tne Smoking Cigar! Goodbive, Frigndly army Horse of the ‘Matted Mane! Goodbye, Fred abah tants manye-many buttalo de keemo-sewy ‘est arneat ‘Mugumba uphum forked tongue talking “indian English with af 'y palabras vammbah olet<) fae) ~~ Sa) Bitermevicicene wih SaMernoplarmg se CT ay) young Indian Brave, "Torn Shitt™bedause i ie ‘exprestall of my compassion for the poor Indians! He's nat letting. me sing! Seat. When | Gtst saw test for the part, Heat. afeced that dere were tears in my ees | done aig i, Salt In what may is Me Furd expressing all of his-compassion foe the poor Indian with this scene? y-| OFT OUCH! COON... Okay, Duket Zee “OKAY! hire your son forthe role! Okay, hire hi Oooh ~, Sie ic ena ei ou ak ek oe pl US Ana Say eiallngold ap Tam ding. my sons! | nave chosen you, Dall Spoon, to can prove Pm QT veont ten | take my place and food the Tribe! Hare is the Secred ul Spaont | neve | 8 | tnese two pus Bundle! Guard it with your life! It contains all of 3 Spanish accent, ‘part! They're the secret dacuments of the Choyenne Indians... three 1s bad as. Pair of dirty soeks, four handkerchiefs, two sweat shirts and". Ooops! Weang bunelle! Chinese Waiterst Thet's the Laundry Bundle! HERE is “7, eg soa at oe aol ce ee arcs erste demon cimercoL Paka ncn aie am tn a ‘Areo't you at all worried ‘Win’? Just because ‘now they've got ccolawitet They st ‘need pitching! Indigns, wyatt? | |The Cheyenne givelup thelr irekand decide to wunpenderto the Americans [talked Karl aut of ehanging bis wame for the film, eft Rainn Ltemember when {frst asked distinguished actor Karl and sfeerave sa the fist "vusbes” of the pieure, ‘Malted to play the pare of Capt: Weasel, the Commander of the Fort..« the Producer had to calk ME onit of anging MINEL oI nde enetctvour mare, orn Wi res mecca Le eaten Sante altos ey ME rivecrrise tne ga ce rontae actrees mabe [| © : eet chacrerae oy Scorer by J oat aa erhalten [Atcer belng imprisoned in adavk and unheated warehouse, the NG Indiss finally break ove anda Bloods bate takes place “ L i iy! vy No, I want you to} Why is this seene any different LLL We're SZ ‘shut up because than tha weal indian bate scene? ‘hy, [winnie fae Oh, he | Souree a rateener fe T tout actor than your Se ake “4 ope ther even! ‘Nov for the amazing character transformation of Li. Seat “Then, Teeeed that the character wansformasion was too fait A eie- the Indian laster-1 on joc the scene this way— Tape vas necessary for Lt Seat to realistically change froma fadian hater tan Indiarvlover. So duis sow I re-shat the scene— {nate the dirty rotien Redskinat | Gespisethe graund | they walk on! The only gaod Indian Fea dead Indiant Of Tate mie gity |[ of caurse, they're Course, they re human beings tke the reat of us, and human Baines lite the now that ve thaught about i, T cespise the ‘thom all dearly! Socome back, poor straated Indians, J | ground they. ‘ed let me kiss your Weather beaten red cheaks! ni The 0 goad Inaian ie therm ail dearly! ‘ BALLOONS! ke Sedead indian! ||” Sp come back, pace mistreated Indians and Tot ree kiss your ‘waatmen besten checks! Can't you ae, it bllaanst‘And now, while the Ghieyenne are hiding out in a cave, I must leave Pou tiawea ae Joba ‘Waine about breaking up our life-long friendship! Enjoy the reso ‘the picture, folks. hay, men—vwe're roady to blast theey Redskine to bite, and nothing c save theml Gat ready. « ment Dan't shoot the indinast This gantieman with me is the Secretary of the Interior! He has orders {rom Washington ta save the Cheyenne and give them back| ‘thale homeland Hey! What happened to Edward G. Robinhood who plays the Seeretary of the Interior! Sir—lockt Off | We're the inthe distance! | US. 'stho US. | Cavalny Cavalry—to ‘Massage foryou, Meadausrters Tepe CHEVENN Beck ito (NOVA TRIDg well, ri Hrumm! Hera is the saered || pec be—edwerd [why Bundle of the Cheyenne | PEF WAS Ven Morse. takers: @:Ropimens | nt, Sit Teka utara cant make | another i ee | Aen Borayen, our con you, and Teale’ that we ee 13 ne tart Hs Ey oes Ses LS You ptan on snow us.ag ood guys" oe love us, we'd aah PESnicly, those prot x CORRS were a tot toa Very truly youre, Be tres BiG kee CHIEF OF CHEYENNE TRIBEO 19 i) W p ca \\SBE a Bi fe\\ = ee eee enn ene ene nn enna en ene. \ iy | — % hae: i cen oo 5 eet & i qa es = Pee = = / : gg rnr amen a anne nn nnn ennanne ne nmmnnnen Ki x —— = = Le SMBS MAGAZINE] 4 | b | | = é & os ae : = arto, WE . oe = wy >JOKE AND DAGGER DEPT. PART |Cate HEADLINE ACTS DE! nen "Cea ins Nee The Gereest struggle in the world today is not taking place in Vietnam or Cyprus or the Congo, It is taking place on our TY sets every weekday evening, That's when Walter Cronkite of CBS locks horns with NBC's Hundey and Brinkley in “The Bauile of the Newseasters." It's been an uphill fight for Cronkite, Huntley and Brinkley throw in lots of quips and funny observations, and this makes the ite show scem dull. Obviously, Walt should make his news shows more entertaining, If he were smart, he'd borrow the style of the greatest T¥ Showman of them all—Ed Sullivan. Let's take a look at what might happen if Walter Cronkite were to follow the Sullivan approach as MAD. presents THE WALT CRONKITE |) Good evening. Hello thera, my [ile chickadees! We have a really big shew Terr ) CSEITED® | on Setatetsndne nates conady coe aM ReSN || ester ay Naw ine sircencs | ano orguent 9 sseet aun Srgereaitna” |e Gemamn in tow ok Tengrt we _ [itis acrobatic defectors from Sulgaria—and—please ho your! | yo, ecko te Wiest eect romtine vak IU" tsar senescent usar andar al yur | we gat iy No ou THE WALT African Nations! Gut frst—let's apen our show with “TODAY'S, CRONKITE SHOW! HEADLINES”, presented by the COS Singing Newsboye. 7’ Hony|Kinasches is bidfng in Saint Reasoncr, Bab Trost, Roger Mudd and Mika Waliscei ‘Eight Vietnamese catch a jungle disease See at When they seizea Chinese passing throught And neve they are... | Yes, we've got the lg News far yout got the Big ba let's wolcoone that musical tr) ‘who have hepi the Republears rocking [7 forte nasttwonty years— big band for The Gon. Th es through ‘But the Kremlin denies daar ‘Yes, we've got the Big News for‘Thote Democrats win # We hoy ‘And Barry makes three! Together we're Three Sad Losers *Sung to the tune of "My Blue Heaven” Tank youl Thank ll First, let's havea hand ENext, let's hear it for And finally, lat's alt BH We've been getting a iot of The for tat colorful dietator I Kine Feisal af Saudi [J wslcame those two funny J) letters asking us to bring : ‘Arabia, who's here [comics without whom this ff back President Jahnsan and with 88 wives, 12 [program would never have | hie tittle friend, Hubertt [come abeut—chot Huntley ‘and Dave Brinkley! Wea to have yau ere tonight fellows Spain Bodyguards and 3 Franco! Stand up and tke | vice-presidents of ‘a bow, Franti «= ‘Standard Oil! Sey helo fo the people, Hubert ‘Now that you are Vice-President, how el fe you the presiding over the Senate? How is everything en Capitol HI? aetna ache Yost AN right! eer And | pound the big gavel... A ght! Ai ane ‘And | recognize all the Demacratsl ‘Yes! | ‘Aad ignore alte Republicans! Very ge0al |or Dirksen is in the boxt An “You bring mo # nice gift, Hubert | kis 200d to be Out ofthe: box! “Git i alt right? ‘a ge ‘i gts Ararat | ING, it isa Democratic housing bill ‘Clase the box! = ft Ig too bad i] Yes, especially since that Senator | “Tre wates forthe Dirksen won't ‘housing Bal the come aut af | Government wil gh “ha box | ‘hin tate ten lon | dollars in defense contracts! Te looks lke Genatar Dirksen will ‘vote for the housing bill after allt ‘Shall I toke him back to the Senate? No, Hubert, leave Bim here! He will make 2 nice playmate for Lue ‘And now, bets turn to the world ef Sportal “This year. Baseball has.a brand new et! ‘Yogi Barra has left the Yankees and is back ‘with his old buddy, Casey Stengel So let's ive a really big welcome to that Oazzling [otamond Duct—Casey Stenzel and Yop! Berral by the Vankce tear! I made sure the ballelut reigned supremet Bisa as — vena Saar AE a Dees ce A eee Now T find chac ir was alla dream! ‘You've a place ‘aight, we'll have another Twvoaler why Toner hy? Toordogen realy ig shew Cl Nesser - ") Over here, wi on aur stage with his: Thad pitching that was no darn good! rained camel, Omar » | Still we topped the League like Vankees should! Baseballs Fun to play ‘ eas Then, that famou anit, [Then they told me I was not their guy! . BG tesaccane ‘Senmny Flatter il wort hi wey? [1 got the Big Goodbye! E Z ‘ut of twelve Federal Indictments |Lwonder why! while hangeutfed! Juan Peron will Introduce a new jl ‘Argentine tango... and finaly, forthe frst time on ary stare “Sung to the tune of “You're Just in Love” > Ce ooDON MARTIN DEPT. PART II IN THE DESERT oO : Ds \ eeONE FOR THE ROAD DEPT. It takes thousands of nuts fo put a car together, but it only takes one nul to scatter a car all over the road. This article is dedicated to the thousands of nuts whe put cars together—and then scatter them all over the road, Mainly, here is our version of the type of mageizines they read CUSTOMIZE YOUR "8G MUSTANG INTO A’89 DODGE FOR LESS THAN st, 000 LOAD ¢° CRASH THE HIGH INSURANCE RISK’S MAGAZINE $145 INCLUDING FUNERAL aT FORESTLAWN a aa w i) ae aie ARTIAT: CEORCE WOODGRIDUE WRITER: TOM KOCH 23WHAT'S NEW THE LATEST FROM MOTORDOM'S MARKETPLACE ae ee a : ‘The Classic Marmon ¥-26 in Nt form is te latest offering of Monstrous Motor Moceis, Recine, Wis. No auto enthusiast will want 49 pass up the cheno to Create fe own replica of thls famous vintage machine, Sealed down to parts {oo sivall to be grasped by human fingers, fs the Kleot gt for driving Dad fr other annoying relatives gut of Unie rind Price $490 eee ‘The Copy Cat Manufacturing Co, of Sarasota, Fla., has begun production of aithentic full size replicas of the fabulous’ Model T. An Ideal attention- ‘getter for all business and pramotional purposes, the medem wersion f= an exact copy of its tamed greetcranddaddy, even dawn to such details as ‘tho unpertected transmission which eaused the original to stip inte high gear ‘ublle unaccupied. Henry Ford sald 15,000,000 of these durable ears for $290. Naw s sparkling new replica ean bs yours for $2,290 F.0.8, Saraota, Flori. Dangerous distortion ereated by modem curved windshiekts fs ended forever ‘with thee fat, perpendicular replacement recently put on the market by the Eagle-Eye Glass Co. of Latrobe, Pa. A leading producer of auto windshields, Until the invention of safety glass fareed the firm to the brink of bankruptcy, Eagle-Eye now bounces back stronger than ever to correct the bungles of lorgor manufacturers. Guaranteed to provide normal road vision through the clever use of uncurved, untinted plate glass, Eagle-Eye windshields can be easily installed by tho doit yourealter once the hazardous original equip- iment of late model cars hadi been smashed and disposed of, Price $35.98 TECHNICAL Bb ‘TALKS , by Edith Barnstable T have doite & thoraugh job of souping up my "EE StcarnyKnight with dual carbs, a full Blown house, Smitty muffler, ete. Hateever at the same time T was overhatiling the engine, I in- stalled square wheels. figured that dhe finished product would do at least 110 M.P.H, But far Some reavon, it won't move at all, What do you ‘think my trouble might be? M.M.C., Salt Lake Gity The '24 StearnsKnight was a straight six with overhead cams. It was never meant to be equipped with dial carbs, The trouble may te there, or i piay that the car is moving bud tat ‘ll the scenery crawnd Salt Lake City looks 10 atch alike that you have the illusion of standing still Thave had a tappet note in my head for almast 10,000,000 miles now. The head of my far, T rican I 4 "5 Blewite, a make whi never got inte full production far a number of reasons, mostly legal. L have rebored the head, stymied che vale sleeves, grannished the crank: case, unduffered Uke pistons and shuttled che rods. Howevet, I still have the tappet noise. Ts this possible? =W.S.P., Loon Lake, Ore, Yen ‘The instruction manual chat came with my oH Chevy says that the windshield should be eased oxcasionally. What hoes this man? LCE, Akron, Ohio Auto instruction mantealt often use terms which apply ta one make or year, but not to others, A qualified meclumic may be able to help ‘eis with Ui problem, but J doubeit. Is i true that ‘65 PaisanoLaragna has gauges registering ergs per RPM, AGDC val Bee, (ent pounds per man-hours, and minutes to play? -C.E.D,, Kenses Ci Only the [650 and X-KAE models, neither of which are available im this country. 1 have been itching to get behind dhe wbecl of the new 400 HIP Alssersti Ronsbout (a tee ‘what those 409 horses can really ao, Gam you give se any advice befare I buy i? TDALF. 58 Loui, Mo. find that scratching without bumps ing into the Overdrive Switel om the 400 TP ‘Maserati Runabout isa factor that any potential buyer with a skin irritation should give more than passing consideration,Micro-Min Test Driving The All-New Shakibutsu i-MidgetV-Zero By Len Furdy neering team wf Wun-Cheep Nip and Q. So-Slik has done it again, Placing an exsily-broken coll speiag power ‘plane inside a flimsy rolled-tin bady, the pir has come up ‘with an economical run-atout that eombines the easy mancue verability of a compact with the type of unbelievable work- manship that American motorists have come to expect from Shakibusu, The author went through the usique experience of piloting ‘he Fur Eastern firm's entry in the 1954 Mobilgns Economy ‘Run. Finishing the cross-country jaunt fess than a year later, T felt that Chad given the Micro-Mini-Midget a fair tral under all types of driving conditions, and found it a ear that defies description in virtually every category. The Mobitgas people apparently shared my opinion after discovering that the wind-up motor has propelled the trim tle V-Zera 3,261 miles on no gasoline at all. The result ef the recor smashing performance was federal Tegilation jammed thraugh Con fes8 by the cil lobby which places a $1,700 import tax on every Micro-Mini-Midget eartied into this sountry. ‘The new ax added to the factory's suggested P.O.E, retail price of $7.98 places Shakibutsu's stripped dawn model in the ridiculous position of competing With the Volkswagen and a handful of domestic compacts. Officials of the Tokyo based firm frankly admit that theiy sole hope of gaining a foothold in the U.S, market is to push the V-2ero as a third ‘sar for American families with two-car garages Tn design, the V-Zero has undergone only a riinor faces lifting since’ the Christmas season of 1963 when a pedal- driven version was introduced a3 & gift item for the 3-0-8 your-old group. The interior remains starkly simple. The Author folind the instrument panel easy to read, but this I T WOULD APPEAR that Shakibutsw's incredible engi- convenience is somewhat diminished by the fast that the gauges are merely printed oa cardboard, glued to the metal dash, and otherwise not connected 19 anything ‘Trunk space is described hy the mapufacturer ia eubie millimeters, creating the illusion that something langce than a box of cough drops can be carried in it, However, sarcful (cant. on page 97) Road Test Results ‘GENERAL ibe Mex Bs ious in PRICE list at PO, $7.38 red price ineloding taxes, Gur wegnt Whoetese "HEOEEECTES, O1. AZ.007 38 ‘Over-all longtt eight Stetricg te Turning radius PERFORMANCE Top speed - Averiph seceleratio OL mph Sesee. Gzmph'3 min, 44 see amen. amis, 12 ste Od mph brs. lap epee SPECIFICATIONS Engine) on windup ling ee Piha fae ay, amin 23 sec dermaeoant 2 ta ow 2 ae Horsoparer idee ee mae “s--Sl3 SPEEDOMETER ERROR Forges & wan isi Hirdial gaint 49 mph Indicated, fotual 1? mph. S0rmph indicated, Actual $1 mph. Bore ellerForecasts And Facts From The Mator Capital ‘TOURING CAR BY KAISER-WILLVS FOR "6? |A survey by the firm's History Department, designed to discover which of the company’s failures had becn longest endured by the public before going Dlooey, arouses industry speculation that the 1920 Overland may be put ‘back into production for the 1966 model year, With such notable fiaccnes fas the Frazer, the Arrericar and the sporty Jeeprier ranking high on the list ‘of alhtime automotive blunders, the sturdy Overland shapes up as the come pany’s best hope fot the future. Executives remain mom, and the aside ‘word is that leaders of the firm are split over the issue of isinglaas curtains for the new eatry in the medium priced feid, BUGS REMAIN IN PIERCE-ARROW'S JET. Word from the supposedy-abandaned Pierce-/\rrow proving ground has it that the company’s bid for a comeback with a jet-prapelled sportster may be delayed until 1973 or 1974, Whispers emanating from the rumor il indicate that a few bugs have yet to be worked out of the engine, and that the fit jet text-car incinerated four mechanics standing behirw it and caused the whole eust wing of the factory to be destroyed by Maries, 0 TIRE MANUFACTURERS KNOW MORE THAN THEY'RE LETTING ON? According to the most reliable reports filtering into the moter capital from Akron, probably not. VOLKEWAGEN MAY MOVE TO DETROIT. At least, so goes the story making the rounds in the motor eapital, Probable reason: VW plans to scrap ils beetle design after almost 20 years in favor ff an updated version replete with massive chrome, high tail flas and power extras, all sct on a frame approximately four feet longer than that of the current model. With American motorists shaping up as the enly potenti buyers in the world, WWW brass may well close down the German plant com- pletely and move all operations to the U.S.A. A CHEVIAG BY.G.M.FOR 19577 General Motors officials reportedly have found a amall hole in their present price line which may be filled in "67 with the introduction af a new car to pllig the gap between the Chevrolet Impala (top price $2,980.50) and the standard Pontiac (base price $2,983.75) With Corvair, Chevelle and Chevy M1 already overlapping. nicely 1 the complete bewilderment of the publicy the new line, tentatively labelled the Chevise, appears. a matural for the shop- ping: motorist with $2,982,124 to spend. oWaP * WINDIE ‘oepxrinben naT=s90¢ per Rng eet thal en 3 me ‘SGah oace un 7 tes int oases Hater, thts 1088 ‘Stor toe es im fue, bens es the ole Ise ca STines'ia'1 ties anda Tee surcharge for’? ew tat tus, 2ultkeser accom int; We urenor sespoote forte boast TAME") forte umteetancing cur averting fates For SALe 121 ais av cumeh 2dr, ambulance. Only a of 8 Kn! eve TRIN te fale of Small egne to FORE renee. Moy Farts Inparatie ao bar, fat maken weeternt epee fon te lds Yeriesemilo e euly eee any 24 (Gi eamsahao wane Ie Suon. 1 Schsepp 2 Raling Mndow foe, rosy, NY “es nocoo-maenne Super Spot Fushacks Never deve by Pe SGnrcuner, fact, pgs poprctina af previa owned are Habis! Speedster stadr soo rule a ockes tender apts sipervisn at Ingiamagels Speedway. Original cat Slo, Slaguer tor or pose endo Lindo Box, Bom Bole Un Septet be a own {in nding, attack $1095, Rufe Sitesiemeger c/o une Fare, lot at Upper Gulch. Wo. ‘wane the cat oa este in So iecelny Tighe beac ues we inanerence the pwr Pk Millenia, bar 79, went Covina ‘rem at Mls Deve vety Hu, Ca Classe 4} eace¥_ Dr, Sedan, Ended moe, Inoue connecting dn Shot tetramer anh manger cetas Wal ade (Sihiy Setters es for aa commen eat conver EIDE, SAME Sate Usemmyreen Outer, Waka Lins. Ch oi ri, eMacasum om mgnes stun. Orgel cost $1700 Wenae for ania of ex. "T gute ge sway from Shea Shake EM, Salami Cheha Diner, FE Wap, a resem foun iTHREE YEARS WORK RESTORING AN APPERSON JACK RABBIT by Waldo Boomschlager date [ stumbled actoss my big find, a 1916 Apperson Jack Rabbit in resterable condition sitting quietly in a barn lo: near Neenah, Wis, Evelyn, whem I had planned at the time to marry but later didn't, was with me as we made our way unsuspect= ingly down the bask eaunty road. We were really in search of milk glass, which Evelyn eolleets and which still abounds in that part of the country. Evelyn already had 700 pieces of the beautiful glass, most ‘of which she had inherited from her late aunt who had re- sided in Elkhart, Ind. The aunt, whose name, as I recall, was either Birdie Wingate or Esther Agnew, had never mazried, bur rather had devoted her life to the milk glass eollection. Mist Wingate for Mics Agnew) had been engaged at ene time to-a Cpl. Wilfred Hungerford who lived just outside of Elkhart on one of the major interwirban lines. But Cpl Hungerford became a mail handler oa the old South Bend, ‘Toledo and Spokane Railroad and ultimately married a girl half his age. In time, the South Bend, Toledo and Spokane merged’ ‘with the Pere Marquette to become the Southern Pasific in one of the more bold strokes of finance put over by Jay Hannah. Hannah's original plan had merely been to extend the lines of the Baltimore and Ohio to Honolulu, But before the track laying had progressed more than 200 miles west of ‘San Franciseo, the entire venture was abandoned as imprace tical. Hannah's decision to give up the Honolult branch was thought to be directly responsible for the suicide of Romney L. Gruber, who had been selected 10 head that division. ‘Gruber mentioned only poor health ia the note he left, and it is true that he had teen suffering from hemorrhoids since shortly after the Spanish-American war. But those who knew (cont. om page 97) I (OUESS FLL NEVER FoROEY Aug. 23, 1953, That was the“CLASSIC SALON ED SEI A NIGHTMARE RE-LIVED STORY AND PHOTOS BY CHARLES L. SWINDLEMIRE eS ie Wien regan -LOWW fil = # a, “oT ‘or HtaxbLY WHATSOEVER did I realize that T was becoming a N intage, classic avomobile collect when [hung 0 $175 price tag on the 'SB bilious blue chunk you sees pictures tf oa this here pags. Depending on a fast turnover the way T got to ifm going to make a buck on the kind of serap iron T handle, ‘eonfinemented my early restoration work ta putting enough s¥- dust in the crankease to quiet down the motor so's the salesmen ‘woulda’t be drownded out complete while they was giving their pitch. Needlessly 0 say, I figured the rad., hr, wsw. and aut. trans, would mail us a pigeon before I had the misforwunate expe- rience of getting too attached to this fat-headed example of De- troit knost-how. Whatseever, my perfunctional foctings about the heap was destined to underwent a change as the Fall of 1963 drifted like usual into Winter. Despite the factor that by which time I had reductioned the prige to $99 and figured to add on the balance of the $175 as carrying changes, my efforts met with growing public heedlessment, On either hand, presumptuously thot sales prospects who tured out to be smarter than 1 thought, files! my’ noggin with 2 fund of lore about the Edsel, none of which I Innd previously Inew before. I ceme to find ovt that the car, originally designed to meet a demand of whieh there wasn't any, had surpasted the tows of all in such performance cutactisms as guzzling gas ing up wind resistance which resulted in a funny whistling and being too big to fit in most garages. After cutting the price to where the heap eventual became a free door prize nobody ‘would take, it come to dawn inside my head that I had unwitt- tessly got tobe an Edsel collector. [learnt to my surprise that T was not the ealy dealer in town what had got interested on the subject in such n way, andl t0- gether with others who was situated similarly like I was, we formed the frst chapter of E.O.A, (Essel Owners Anonymous). Today, wwe can boast of having saved inoumerous dealers from knorking theinselves aff by arranging for our members to rush over and get drunk with them whenever they think of the dough they got tied upin Easels. Truly example of automobile histery we should forget, (cont. om page 97)ileal messa Veer MAU) Wo 1erease is on its wayl ae 5 AS : i \ WHAT ) Mila Te : THEY “= z SAY AND Sa WHAT ~ “1 put weetecreD WEEK NALLY OF 196+ BLUE CROSS weer maouen aN ENTIRE WEEK WITHOUT ONCE ASW mle Rares.) A217 fe On vwmcsrnow. fer Uno 1 cast ate Sn hoe pia pou = HAS MADE 17 SUCCESSIVE MOVIES —- EACH ‘OF WHICH HAS WON UNANIMOUS CRITICAL RAVES, ANGEACH OF vile Ks CAPTURED FURST PRIZE | AT ME UAL CANNES FL FESTIVALS, AND YET UKE MOST OF HS AUDIENCES... HE HASN'T, UNDERSTOOD & SINGLE ONE OF THI [aeniatinan ors oe A ORS Day TEGINIECLER Mustenw? Ly EN ACE hidear tar me VASSAR PROM 4 “y, pi” MERE weg wget THE BOYS AT THE VASSAR PROM jQULD GET VERY NAUSEOUS/BERG'S-EYE VIEW DEPT. In our last issue, va I ~ Dave Berg took a THE; ieee le of 1c ssl ame 7 TORT TER pose oe nical at him off wit kee SIDE OF ‘get a good story! Let's see rmsoery I'm lat, Mr. Dilly, But my arhad a fat tire sr the train gan fatal” (Oh, my gosh? | avarslont! Naw I'm aing fo Be lato for work again That's just HUI nedte ‘bring the stuHt homel Then, bak atthe oie, 307 ‘clown Brough in the new se ole thet for awe Tigh ‘there was 4 big thing because | lost my key to the Men's Room! Then there wes another coffee break Then my Mather calles: snd you know how ahe cam tatkt First there was bia fuss because Irwin Denayfield's wife hod a baby? Then Ben started telling offcolor jokes! Burat}astcamesuiceet, Today, I'm earnin THOUSAND. BoLukAb a vean (Gee, i | as only earning Titty thousand dallaes a yest, I'd bein tha clear! wren waz mating oly $20 ‘soveek, Fused to say,” ‘Miaseely earning 925 work, a be in the wear” ai ee fm soery 'm late, Me. Dilly. but my ear ee CAR, Ero. .uh. ot hhad a fist tre ang the train an late BUT MY DILLY RAN LATE AND ytaid crs lyany eb ONE ‘THE TRAIN ee‘Alice? Well there waz na Mother thera! ‘Kapateik Enterprisest Good mamingt Mr. Nywos.a Bachelor Apartment... Hold ont Hallo, Altcel This is Arngt What a night| Gunipky? Just a mamant! il eonnect yout Thad ast night! lwent out with Bll and after dlaner, he... Haid an ‘Kaputnik Enterprises! Goo morningt He. jee? So—thinking evenjthing wes on ae tent to hit “Happ? Just a mament! Ill eonnect you! ‘the upand-up, tment to his place! Gutwhen we got there... Hotdian .. ‘Kaputnik Enterprises! ll eonneet yau! ‘lea? $0—{he minute the door closed behind me, he starts looking at me lke reas Gina Lolopaloaes.. Hold on. Kaputnik Enlerpdses! Good morning! ‘Just one moment! il cannset you! and then wn stand around in trent ‘Dullding forse rest of the Lec and watch the girls ga by! oy, am | lueky ? ‘overheard that! If Its Independent Hen? Yas, si— You want to order 16 pross of -aputnik Enterprises! Fi connect youl ‘AMY! FOR PETE'S SAKE, SHUT DOWN New. maybe we can hear) [Allee? So— THE SWITCHBOARD! 1 DON'T WANT. haw this comesaut without | | anpway=he ANYINCOMING CALLS FOR THE THENEXT| | any mace Interruptions! ‘grabs mie FIFTEEN MINUTES! 501 says, “Pil have you know Tm not ‘hat kin ef gi But that ean stop bhi! He grabe ‘KaplAnik Enterprises! | eannect youl Te Eat this Boss, see! He's ‘And work with this Swel ‘Our firms expanding fast Hella, Wickyi ‘a nice guy and allt! I've bunch of guys! But one's a Ang ins means mora work ant Iaidn'e got nothing against hist Gut bigger nit than the ather! responsibilty tor mel Just notice—Is fhe should drop dead? Le’ Like today—bian—blat—biah! | [today—bah—blah—blan—blah! || your husband tell yau what happen hore tonight? Bish —blan—biah—blan—bah [Very interesting, Bosworth! Traine to zee you in my office after ta conterencat Weil, Bosworth, er boy! You've ‘gatlt made! Naw that you're sing to be-a Department Head, yeu ean get that new jaguar! something extra in your pay envelope this waek .. mainly a Isle natiew of sismissall You're just nota Team Man"! We Nava AO ream around hhere-far indopendect thirkerst BOTTLENECK PRESIDENT Hay, just overhear the He wouldn't fire met } Ha woutda’t fire met || He wouldn't {ire ma] Boss saying that business mn too valuable! |) “I'm too vatablal | || 1m toe valuable! |'m| is off, and he's gonna have] | valuable! He needs | | Nobody makes coffee || get him discounts en |} ne only are who 227} ‘to get nd of some of the || meen theCompany|| likeImake cottes ||" allthethings he |} Keepihe Petty Cash deadwood sroundnera!_ || Bowling Team! J [fer the Cottee Breaks!|| Buys... through my || box stralght! Brothar-in-Lawt nathing going for me except aJOKE AND DAGGER DEPT. PART III ia Be Steir ee eeAGE BEFORE BOOTY DEPT, Whatever happened ta the sleazy, slimy, ugly ald crooks we used to know and love? Remember back inthe good old days—when had guys fooked like had guys, and good guys looked like good guys? Well, today all that has changed. F'rinstance, every week on TV, therc’s a group of cultured, refined and articulate gentlemen who travel from nent to continent—robbing from the rich without ever getting caught. We mean, of course, those well-dressed, well-mannered, well-heeled, roguish thieves who are known as . THE ROOKS Ask the girls of London... Ask the girls of Paris... Ask the giris of New York... 1 — “THE FILLY AND THE FINK PHILATELIST” “a‘Mon Dieu. this By the way, St, Care — that's a great disguise! Did I heae you 7 this ees muitismilionaire, Orville Cesst || were planning ‘snather job? Tell me about it) ‘And Muscal hos gotten word ta.Cess that he knows where itis! Then he will arrange ‘with Mr. Ceas ston! ‘And guess who he will steal efram® You, Sincere. ‘Cess ees a fanatic stamp collector who | ‘as tho rare $100,000 “dames Krox Polk ‘doesn’t ntartere wth ‘the dull aetiantSo = '5t.Care, ald boyt = aot sentirns Me, sopnistieates ‘we must be ‘encomed “wit our Tart Ag Me Cosel | guarantes Tih, Wisloor Coss—ere os the {retest stamp euthority in the sth te $160,000 Starp an tach ‘this nasty million anna ee ie oniaty th crime 0 pata ie Oe PET E = Franky, you pases: Mi. Since! F—=—=—=_ because ts | || Actually, Near’ ‘Who's tathing You sitthere in your wr should | 130 degrees | || stand swimming poo! iu jacket, white flannel trousers, ‘that — || inthe shadot | | — The sight of an old a cress shirt and ascot - russia you, | iy dont you ||] parton vahing around Bet into a bathing sultr 7 "1 when they talk! What da you do for 8 teing? Ne, tat ‘An ta’ | was while fever bat 135, you eat || married! i yeas etarmpl Ect But ove belongs te your Onele, and ‘20s worth $100,000! Use ‘eu: to buy your freedom‘Achat (vs fauna yuse! You did't get aay with suspected something when you said the picture on the stamp was Chester Arthur Alan! You should Nave known the Portrait was actually Franklin Roosevelt Delano (My poor, foalish chill What we have ‘canat Last Ie but a thing of the moment! We have #0 Enough with the “Ola Man pill aot yourComevnmetsthe | 1 wil but Hosa ice Station! | Rave a getaway. first 101 We really ay wincenaRivalceracergtricarae” | fait id I, gloat for fd Man! terminates! a stamp as evidence, Mr. Gess! You ean come in and elaine Faker! sie sy wigs pal ‘ Mow ae yeu] ued tg, Sot etre al, [ogee f woonyaurain | "ahoneh” Yl More S03 |. ter cman [SS 25 upset Fools! tam sory stupid to se0 your it Mothere 20 ‘about the Upset Rooks giving fF money? | away the ‘steal it = money, Mams? I trom them! i ‘enough?DON MARTIN DEPT. PART IllAe 7 COMES AFTER POP ART AND OP ART HERE WE GO WITH ANOTHER RIDICULOUS MAD FOLD-IN Several years ago, the Art World was invaded by painters of soup cans and comic strip panels. They called this junk “Pop Art.” Now, another group of idiots have come along with paintings of optical illusions, They call this junk “Op Art.” So where do we go from here? Fold page in as shown and see ro ig seer ee LEFT STUDIES IN POP ART and OP ART ren wee sae ets oe EMPTY-HEADED ART DABBLERS ASSUME THAT ANYTHING INA FRAME IS ART AS LONG AS IT HANGS IN SOME FANCY GALLERY. BIG IMPRESSIVE PRICES LEND A PHONY PRESTIGE TO EACH ART MOVEMENT Ab 48THE DAY THEY SHOT THE “TEN-FOOT-TALL WASHING MACHINE” COMMERCIAL IN AN 8-FOOT HIGH BASEMENT