Keys for an Effective Life

Powerful Concepts in Personal

Change

Introduction
“I’m busy – really busy. But
sometimes I wonder if what I’m
doing will make any difference in the
long run. I’d really like to think there
was meaning in my life, that
somehow things were different
because I was there.”
“I’ve started a new diet – for the fifth time
this year. I know I’m overweight, and I
really want to change. I read all the new
information, I set goals, I get myself all
psyched up with a positive mental attitude
and tell myself I can do it. But I don’t.
After a few weeks, I fail. I just can’t seem
to keep a promise I make to myself.”
“My teenage son is rebellious and on
drugs. No matter what I try, he won’t
listen to me. What can I do?”
“My marriage has gone flat. We don’t
fight or anything; we just don’t love
each other anymore. We’ve gone to
counselling; we’ve tried a number of
things, but we just can’t seem to
rekindle the feeling we used to have.”
Why is it so hard to change?

The Power of a Paradigm:

Understanding why we behave
the way we behave
"Just thinking of my troubles and my
lonely wandering makes me
miserable. That's all I ever think
about, and I am depressed."
Lam 3:19,20 (CEV)
 Paradigms (or “maps”) – made of
• Beliefs
• Values
• Rules
 Beliefs
• “I am always …”
• “In general, people are…”
• “God is …”
• “Life is …”
• “…”
 Values – “For me, it’s important
to…”
• Feel happy
• Be loved
• Eat well
• …
 Rules
• “In order to feel happy, I have to feel that
other people love me”
• “People love me when I do what they want me
to do”
• “God will approve me if I do everything right”
 Paradigms (or “maps”) – made of
• Beliefs
• Values
• Rules
 Paradigms (or “maps”) – built by
• Experiences
• Information
• Feelings
 "This is the covenant I will make
with the house of Israel after that
time," declares the LORD . "I will put
my law in their minds and write it on
their hearts. I will be their God, and
they will be my people.
Jer 31:33 (NIV)
“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he
is a new creation; the old has gone,
the new has come!”
2 Corinthians 5:17 (NIV)
"Just thinking of my troubles and my
lonely wandering makes me
miserable. That's all I ever think
about, and I am depressed.
Then I remember something that fills
me with hope."
Lam 3:19-21 (CEV)
The LORD's kindness never fails!
   If he had not been merciful,
   we would have been destroyed.
The LORD can always be trusted
   to show mercy each morning.
Deep in my heart I say,
   "The LORD is all I need;
   I can depend on him!"
Lam 3:22-24 (CEV)