IELTS EXAMPLE OF WRITING

Financial education should be mandatory component of the school program. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? It is an obvious fact that financial aspects are a major part of daily life, as an adult and even as a young individual. Each and every one of us has to make financial decisions concerning recreation, health, education and more. The question is whether to start with financial education as part of school program or postpone it for a later stage in life. To being with, being able to understand the value of money, the way the economic system works and interpret financial news and its implications is a virtue. Without this virtue, an individual, and even a young one, might suffer, to some extent. For an example, a child who doesnt understand the concept of money might find it more difficult to except choosing only one present out of more possible ones. In addition, many adults are lacking financial analysis capabilities. Quite often, the reason can be a shaky basis or insecurity when it comes to financial terms and concepts. Starting from an early age, building a strong background, can very likely prevent such a situation.

However, financial education necessarily involves quantifying and setting prices and value for services and goods. It can be easily turn young people into cynical and cold-hearted human beings. Furthermore, a tendency to self-concentration and egoism might rise when one start measuring everything from a profit making perspective. In conclusion, financial education has both pros and cons. In my opinion, the advantages are stronger than the disadvantages, making financial education an advisable component of school program. The disadvantages should be thought of as a certain price that young people have to pay due to the characteristics of the world that we live in. This is a wonderful essay. It covers the task, is correctly structured, the paragraphs are logically connected, the structure of sentences shows excellent command of English. The vocabulary is fine and both spelling and grammar are very good. See comments underlined in blue for some minor corrections. Overall, looks like a Band 7.5 8 essay

In some countries children have very strict rules of behavior, in other countries they are allowed to do almost anything they want. To what extent should children have to follow rules? The extent to which children have to follow rules is in itself a very complex issue, since children across the world grow up in very different cultures. In India for example, the level of morality is very high and children are to be very submissive to their parents as well as other adults around them. This, however, is not the case for the Western countries of the world where children follow the motto Thou shalt do what thou wilt as promoted by celebrities and rock stars. I believe that following strict rules has both advantagesas well as serious drawbacks as discussed below.

Firstly, strict rules of behavior create responsible and respectful children who in turn mature into respectful adults. This forms a stable society which is virtually free from vices such as prostitution and drug abuse. Secondly, if children do not follow strict rules of behavior, they will get out of hand and become work- shy and indolent. This will then create a burden on society since the government has to find ways to cater for these social ills.

However, forcing children to follow strict rules of behavior doesnt always yield positive results as discussed above, most of the time it backfires and works against society. For example, teenagers are more likely to do the opposite of what theyre told to do simply because they want to be independent. Children should also have rights to exercise their free will and develop their own pattern of behaviors. Strict rules simply destroy the individuality of children if theyre imposed on them. At the end of the day, it is clear that children should be guided by rules, but these rules should not be imposed on them because as human beings, they need to have room to develop their own traits of character and adopt a behavioral pattern of their own. This essay is too long (309 words instead of advised 250-265). Otherwise this work is a very good one; it covers the task, your position is clear, the ideas are well-organized, expressed, explained and supported. The sentences show a wide range of language structures, cohesive devices and the grammar is fine. Overall, looks like a band 7.5 or higher essay. As computers are being used more and more in education, there will be soon no role for teachers in the classroom. There is no doubt that education and the learning process has changed since the introduction of computers: The search for information has become easier and amusing, and connectivity has expedited the data availability. Though experts systems have made computers more intelligent, they have not yet become a substitute of the human interaction in the learning process. In my opinion; what can be expected, is a change of the teachers? role but not their disappearance from the classroom.

Nobody can argue that the acquisition of knowledge is more fun and easier with computers. The mere activity of touching and exploring this device constitutes an enjoyable task for a kid. This, accompanied with the relaxing attitude and software interactivity, usually conduce to a better grasping of new knowledge. At a higher educational level; the availability of digital books, simulator and other academic materials, provide the student with an ever accessible source of information, that otherwise would not be at hand. But, besides the increasing complexity and behavior of intelligent software, which is usually embedded in the academic digital material, the need of human interaction in the learning process will always be present, at least in the foreseeable future. There is the necessity for a human being to be able to determine what thespecifics needs of each individual are. The expertise of a teacher in how to explain and adapt complex concepts to different individuals can hardly be mimicked by a computer, no matter how sophisticated its software is. As computers are becoming a common tool for teaching, teachers should be more aware of their role as guides in the acquisition of knowledge rather than transmitters of facts. They have to be open minded to the changes that are taking places, keep updated and serve as a problem solvers in the learning process, thus allowing students to discover the fact for themselves.

To summarize, in my personal view, teachers play and will() play an important role in the classroom, especially at the primary level. No matter how complex computers become, there will be no replacement for the human interaction, but in the way haw thisinteraction takes place. Excellent essay! Are you a native English speaker? Well done. The only problem: too long, 365 words instead of 250-265 maximum. Dieting can change a persons life for the better or ruins ones health completely. Whats your opinion? Dieting seems to be part of our life in this modern society, especially for those who are health conscious. Different people choose different type of dieting methods, trying to achieve what they believe to be good for either their health or physical appearance. In general, most of the people who diet are focusing on controlling their weight. In our urban society, most of the working class person does not have the opportunity to consume a healthy meal. Their daily meals consist of fast food which contains high amount of fat and salt. The most significant prove of this unhealthy lifestyle is weight gain especially among those middle age working professionals. Therefore, most of these young and energetic people have to control their diet in order to stay in shape either for their appearance or health. The most common and proper method of maintaining ones weight is eating less oily food, preferably more green vegetables, fruits and avoid alcohol. However, some have restore to loosing weight by restricting their diet to the very minimal or to some extreme, not eating at all for days. Others will make themselves vomit after each meal. Many others will go for dieting medication and beverages that cause them to loose their appetite. These unhealthy dieting will cause internal damage in the long run. In my opinion, dieting for better health is more important than solely for looking attractive. Individual who wish to control their weight should seek professional advise if they are unable to reduce their weight after switching over to a healthy diet for a period of time. Loosing weight and loosing your health together does not benefit any individual. This essay needs some work. The first body paragraph explains the reason people have for dieting, whereas it should explain what are the advantages or the dangers of it. The second body paragraph explains how to diet, whereas it should present arguments for or against dieting. Therefore, the task is only partially covered here. On the bright side, the sentences are well-structured and the vocabulary is sufficient, the usage of linking words is smooth and the spelling and grammar are mostly fine (see comments underlined in blue). Overall, looks like a Band 6 essay The boys are most influenced by their fathers and girls are most influenced by their mothers. Do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and details to support your opinion. It is true that nowadays parent have a great influence over thechildren. Some people hold the opinion that the same sex is the major determinations of influencing parent, but others have a negative attitude. As far as I am concerned, I agree that boys are most influenced by their fathers and girls are most influenced by their mothers. My arguments for this point are listed below. First of all, father is the person who passed that ways which arehis son is passing now, in the other words, sons are stepping in a trace which fathers had driven them. So, based on experience it is easy for father to notice sons drawbacks and influence them.

Secondly, it is true that a boy is countedas a strong characteristics human , but a girl is subtle and fragile one. It is hard for mothers to influence their sons, because it is unbelievable that vulnerable something can affect a strong one. In conclusion, it seems to me unfair that boys are most influenced by their mothers. Based on at least two points which are above I strongly agree that children are influenced by a parent of the same gender. This essay is too short, 190 words instead of the minimum requirement of 250. It doesnt say anything about girls being influenced by their mothers, which is also a part of the task therefore the task is only partially covered. The sentences are not complex enough, there are grammatical mistakes and language inaccuracies (see comments underlined in blue). Overall, looks like a Band 5.5 essay Some people think that it is important to use leisure time for activities that improve the mind, such as reading and doing crossword puzzles. Others feel that it is important to rest the mind during leisure time. Discuss. As we are a human we naturally need to take rest on leisure time to recover thestress of work and everyday life. In fact, every individual need to do what they want and belong to them. Personally, I prefer to be active during this time because it is feel right to me better. Moreover, people are free for what they do ontheir leisure time, and nobody can say what it is the best.

Some people want to relax after their working day. These people prefer to relax by watching movies, reading or doing some massage. People who have a physically jobs such as doctor, teacher and builder may choose these type of activities. If you are doctor, you may feel that you want to take rest for your body after work and you dont want to do a five kilometer run after work, because you are already physically tired. On the other hand, some people choose to be active on their leisure time because they do very sitting jobs. For example, these people many spend all day sitting on a chair and do their work. At the end of a working day, they may be have a backache, and all of their body become tired so they need to stretch their arms and improve their health by doing some activity such as going to the gym or swimming. To sum up, the important things that people want to stay healthy by choosing what is best for them. In my view, the wrong way to stay at home in your leisure time if you have a setting job. This essay needs work. It has the right structure and covers the task. However there are many poorly structured sentences, many of the sentences are too simple and dont have enough complexity, there are grammatical errors and incorrect usage of prepositions (see comments underlined in blue). Overall, looks like a Band 6 6.5 essay.

The rising levels of congestion and air pollution found in most of the world cities can be attributed directly to the rapidly increasing number of private cars in use. In order to reverse this decline in the quality of life in cities, attempts must be made to encourage people to use their cars less and public transport more. Discuss possible ways to encourage the use of public transport. To what extent do you agree with this statement? You should write at least 250 words. In a world of increasing environmental awareness improved public transport represents the way of the future. Although people do enjoy the convenience and privacy of traveling in their own private vehicles, in my opinion they may choose public transport if it fulfills certain

conditions. These conditions fall into three broad categories: attitudinal, financial and logistical. From an attitudinal perspective, people must first be convinced of the benefits of public transportation. An educational or public relations campaign must be launched to sensitize those who might have disregarded this possibility before. People should be familiarized with the environmental, social and personal benefits for present and future generations. This is one step. From a financial perspective, public transportation must be a clear and viable benefit to consumers. In other words, it must be more affordable than driving to work every day. For example, if people know that by using bus and subway, they can save enough money to take a free holiday each year, many more individuals would be persuaded to travel in this way. This is another critical step. From a logistical perspective, public transportation should be convenient for commuters. City planners and transport officials must ensure that frequent and reliable public transportation is available for each citizen. For people to make the habit of traveling by bus or subway, they must know that they will be able to get to various places on time. Transport vehicles must be well maintained, subway and bus drivers should be customeroriented and service must be punctual and efficient. This is an additional important step. In conclusion, through a multi-pronged approach, it is possible to increase the use of public transportation. City officials and politicians can lead the way by utilizing these forms of transport themselves and bringing about change through personal example. Then, more citizens will follow suit and we may all hope to live in a cleaner, less polluted environment.