Royal University of Phnom Penh Institute of Foreign Languages Department of English

Study Club M 2.7 Semester 1(07-08) Writing Skills 201

Paragraph

Characteristics

A good paragraph must have not only three paramount elements a topic sentence, supporting sentences, and a concluding sentence but also certain characteristics unity, coherence, cohesion, and completeness.

Unity
A paragraph is a group of sentences about a single idea. While a topic sentence introduces the audience to the topic, the second sentence signals the reader about the organization of the paragraph the will follow. The remaining sentences in the paragraph should the controlling ideas in the topic sentence, and the last sentence concludes the paragraph. If all the sentences in the paragraph are about a single idea, and if the sentences are closely related, the paragraph will be unified or has unity. Any sentence that does not support the paragraph is called irrelevant sentences. That sentence should be modified or removed from the paragraph. Ads for People Not all newspaper advertisements are for selling things. Some ads are about people. Some ads are about beverage. The Help Wanted ads give information about jobs. All kinds of jobs are found in this part of the newspaper. There are ads for secretaries and electricians, doctors and professors. Another kind of ad about people is the Personal ad. These ads are not about work. They are written by people who are looking for friends. You can also find these ads in magazines. Sometimes these people are looking for husbands and wives. Newspaper ads are good way to get people together. However, not many people read newspaper these days. (This paragraph does not have unity. Why???) Could You Lend Me...? Borrowing things from other people is not always bad. This is because sometimes you do not have to buy a thing that is expensive and is in need once or twice. For example, you have a date with your valentine and promise to pick her up for a romantic dinner. Unfortunately, your motorbike does not work on that day. Do you have to buy a new one then? No, just borrow another from anyone you know, so that your sweet meeting will not be spoiled. Besides, it sharpens your sense of responsibility. Once you are lent something, you are supposed to take great care of it and give it back on time. Otherwise, the owner will get upset, in case you do even minor damage or return it behind the schedule. Indeed, should you urgently need something, do not forget Could you lend me?. (This paragraph has unity. Why???)

PRACTICE Find and cross out any sentences that do not belong in the paragraph below.
Automatic Customer Service Today people have fewer human contacts as they go about their personal business. To buy gas, you can pull up alongside as gas pump, insert a credit card, and fill the tank without the help of an attendant. The charge is made automatically to your credit card. You can pay for your purchase inside the station office. If you want to make a deposit or withdraw some money from the bank, you can step up to an automatic teller machine (ATM) to complete your business without talking to a teller. In fact, banking service charges are rising rapidly. Moreover, to park in a public lot, you drive alongside a ticket dispenser machine, from which an automatic voice explains what you should do. The gate then opens and allows the car in. When you leave, you insert the ticket in a machine, the gate opens, and you are on your way. What are the disadvantages of automatic customer machine service?
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Royal University of Phnom Penh Institute of Foreign Languages Department of English

Study Club M 2.7 Semester 1(07-08) Writing Skills 201

The Celebration of the New Year If you go to Cambodia during the New Year, you will get excited together with all of the people of the country. The month after harvesting, in the middle of April, is Cambodian New Year. All the public offices, schools, factories and shopping stores close for three days. There are six main holidays each year in Cambodia. In front of the Royal Temple, in all the city parks and on the big plaza, there are crowded ceremonies to celebrate these significant days. You can join the traditional dances, classical operas, and different but interesting kinds of games. Even though we feel tired at the end of the holidays, we believe that New Year will bring happiness and hope to us.

Coherence
Even when a paragraph is unified, and the topic sentence is well supported, the paragraph can still sound choppy (that is, rough or interrupted) unless it has coherence. A c0herent paragraph is made up of ideas which arranged in order according to principle. The principle changes depending on the type of a paragraph that you are writing. Type of Paragraph Type of Organization Chronology (history events, personal narrative, Order by time or order of events/steps. process) Description Order by space (top to bottom, right to left, front to back, head to foot etc.) Classification Group ideas and explain them in a logical order. Comparison/contrast Organize in point-by-point or block style. Argumentation/persuasion and cause/effect Order from least to most important or most to least important. The Instrument of an Orchestra The modern orchestra is divided into four distinct groups. The first group is strings. Their sound is produced by vibrating strings or wires. Woodwind instruments make up the second section of an orchestra. These instruments, such as flutes, piccolos, and oboes, make their sound by the player blowing into a mouthpiece and opening and closing holes in the instrument. The third is the brass section, whose instruments make sounds by the vibration of the players lips on a mouthpiece. Examples of brass instruments are bugles, trumpets, and tubas. Examples of string instruments are violins, cellos, and basses. The last section is the percussion section. Examples of percussion instruments include cymbals, drums, and tambourines. When put together, these four groups of instruments make a complete orchestra. (This paragraph is lack of coherence. Why???) A Strange Day in Class I have been studying English for a few years and I really enjoyed the class. One day something unusual happened in class. The teacher was explaining the grammar when I saw something strange out of the window. The sky began to get dark. Just then, at the door appeared the shadow of a man. It was not really a man but a vampire. It smashed the door, wanting to suck blood. Everyone was panic and ran here and there as soon as the vampire had entered the room. Unluckily enough, it caught me and started to suck my blood. So terrified that could I do nothing but closed my eyes and cried aloud. After that, I heard everyone laughing. I woke up and realized that it was a dream. (This paragraph has coherence. Why???)

PRACTICE Circle the sentence that is out of order and draw to indicate where it should go.
Vocation in Florida Our vacation in Florida last month was a real disaster. On the way to the airport, our taxi broke down, so we missed our plane to Miami and had to as wait several hours for the next flight.
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Royal University of Phnom Penh Institute of Foreign Languages Department of English

Study Club M 2.7 Semester 1(07-08) Writing Skills 201

After that, on arriving at our hotel there, our reservation had been canceled because we were late, and we got a new hotel room after arguing with the manager. The second day, someone broke into our room and stole all our clothes. It also rained the entire week, so we could not go to the beach at all. Finally, when arriving home, we found that water had flooded the house due to a broken pipe. In conclusion, we should have stayed at home. My First Car My first car was old and ugly, but I loved it anyway. The main paint color was black, but it also had blue, green, yellow, and white paints in different places. The seats had at least ten holes in them. The body was terrible condition. It had several big dents. The hood lock was broken, so I had to tie it down with a strong rope. In addition, the back bumper was rusty, and the front window was cracked. The inside of the car was also a disaster. The inside door handle on the passenger side was missing. As a result, you could not open the passenger door from the inside. Plus, the gas gauge was broken. It always showed full, so I often ran out of gas. The speedometer was broken too. That was why I never knew how fast I was driving. Like a first love, my old Lexus had a few faults, but to me it was perfect.

Cohesion
Another characteristic of a good paragraph is cohesion. To bring cohesion to his paragraph, a writer use cohesive devices words or phrases that connect sentences together, creating a smooth flow of ideas. Three main kinds of cohesive devices are transition signals, pronoun references, and synonyms. Pet Dogs Americans love their pet dogs. They do many things for them. They treat their pets like human beings. They like to talk to their dogs and treat them like children. My neighbor Mrs. Green talks to her dog, Ruffy, all the time. Mrs. Green takes her dog for a walk twice a day. Mrs. Green will not leave her dog when her dog is sick. Americans send their dogs to training school to be good and to listen to commands. Americans spend a lot of money on their dogs. They feed their dogs on expensive dog food with flavors that people like such as beef, chicken, liver, and cheese. Their dogs have brightly colored balls, rubber bones, and other toys to play with. In the winter, it is usual to see dogs with coats on to keep them warm. Some dogs even wear collars with colorful, sparking stones that look like diamonds or rubies. Some Americans bathe their dogs in the bathtub. Other Americans take their dogs to a dog beauty shop. Their dogs toenails clipped. Their dogs fur is brushed and trimmed. Their dogs are given a bath with special dog shampoo. Americans love their pet dogs a lot. Americans are willing to spend both time and money on them. (This paragraph has no cohesion. Why???) Causes of Bicycle Accidents Most bike accidents are due to equipment failure, weather conditions, and bikers carelessness. To begin with, many different pieces of bicycle equipment can become defective and cause bike accidents. For example, if a bike does not have good brakes, it cannot be stopped effectively. Similarly, a weak light will make it more difficult for a biker to see at night. Aside from detective equipment, a biker often has difficulty controlling his bicycle when it is windy and rainy. Under such conditions, water may impair the brakes and obstruct the bikers view; too much wind will affect steering. Nonetheless, bike accidents are mainly caused by a bikers carelessness. For instance, accidents can be produced by a biker who does not stop at a stop sign and by a biker whose pants legs get caught in the bike chain. The number of bike accidents could be greatly reduced if bikers checked their equipment, rode in good weather, and practiced bike safely. (This paragraph has cohesion. Why???)

PRACTICE Rewrite the below paragraph by using cohesive devices.

Brown Rice and Vegetables
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Royal University of Phnom Penh Institute of Foreign Languages Department of English

Study Club M 2.7 Semester 1(07-08) Writing Skills 201

Brown rice and vegetables is simple and delicious meal to make. Cook the rice. Follow the direction on the package. Cut the vegetable into one-inch pieces. Heat the oil, chili sauce, and garlic in a frying pan. Add the vegetables. Fry the vegetables until the vegetables are soft, but still a little bit crunchy. It is time to stir the cooked rice. Stir the rice and the vegetables together. Add salt and pepper to your own taste. Put the rice and vegetables into a large bowl. Serve the rice and vegetables with freshly chopped tomatoes and green onions on top. You are ready to enjoy your delicious brown rice and vegetables!

Completeness
Another characteristic of a good paragraph is completeness. Your paragraph is complete when it has all the major supporting sentences it needs to fully explain the topic sentence and all the minor supporting sentences it needs to explain each major supporting sentence. A paragraph that is not complete does not have enough sentences to follow through on what the topic sentence promises. Solar Cell Energy There are many reasons why solar cell energy generation has not developed more rapidly. First, the cost per watt of solar cell generation is more expensive than that of steam power or unclear power generation. Therefore, researchers are still looking for ways to make solar cells cheaper. Second, nature plays a larger part in solar cell generation. Finally, building plants for solar cell generation is extremely expensive. A very large space is needed, and the need for maintenance is constant. For these reasons, it is very difficult to develop solar cell energy generation. (This paragraph is not complete. Why???) Benefit of Vitamin A Scientific studies have shown that vitamin A may have beneficial effects in clearing up skin problems, treating eye disorders, and fighting infection. Tablets with vitamin A have been used effectively in treating skin problems like acne. when applied directly on skin, vitamin A can also clear up boils and heal ulcers. Injections of vitamin A have even been used to remove warts from peoples skin. Vitamin A is a successful way of treating such eye disorders as night blindness and blurred vision. In addition, therapeutic doses of vitamin A are used to treat glaucoma and conjunctivitis. Most important, vitamin A plays integral role in fighting infections. Because it strengthen cell walls, vitamin A protects the mucous membrane from invading bacteria. Furthermore, dosages of vitamin A have shortened the duration communicable diseases, such as cold and measles. In conclusion, these beneficial effects demonstrate the importance of encouraging people to take regular dietary supplement of vitamin A. (This paragraph is complete. Why???)
Reference: 1. Hogue, Ann and Oshima, Alice, Introduction to Academic Writing, 2nd ed. New York: Longman, 1997. 2. Hogue, Ann. First Step in Academic Writing. 3. Reid, Joy M. The Process of Paragraph Writing, 2nd ed. New Jersey: Prentice Hall, 1994. 4. SOPHA Ratana. Mini Test II, IFL, 2006 5. Rooks, George M. Paragraph Power, 2nd ed. University of California: Longman, 1999. 6. Boardman, Cynthia A. and Frydenberg, Jia. Writing to Communicate. Pearson Education: Longman, 2002.

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