Think you're not enough?

I have been there. I thought I was not enough. And the truth is that
what we should not do is berate ourselves to become a better version
of ourselves. However, even though I am becoming more aware of
this every day, I still sometimes (although less and less) become a
victim of my own negative thoughts.

I'm sure you see yourself reflected. All the people have been there.
We have all had bad days and times when we have not trusted
ourselves.

In fact, I wasn't going to post this today. I wasn't planning to post it

on the blog because it is something very personal that I decided to
share with myprivate community a couple of days ago. But after the
100+ comments and sitting back and reflecting, I've decided to do it.

After all, this is part of me. It is part of what hascontributed to

taking away my health. And it is part of what is giving it back to me.

But, above all, it is part of what is rebuilding me as a person. Edit:of

how I am rebuilding ME as a person.

This is what I wrote, although I have added something more

I have been reflecting for a week on a series of personal situations

that I have been going through with my father, and I wanted to share
an intimate part of me here.

When I was a little girl I made the decision that I loved the piano and
wanted to be a pianist. I was given a scholarship to study at one of
the most renowned centers in the UK, and from the age of 13 I was
traveling and giving concerts as a soloist.

This in itself was already a big pressure, but I had another one that I
wasn't fully aware of until recently.

I have traveled and played in very important venues. But my father,

whenever he talked about me to others, exaggerated my
accomplishments. He would make up stories like he had played at
Carnegie Hall or other venues more important than where he had
actually been.

And with all this, I always thought it wasn't enough. I always

thought:"if I could do it better...".

After all, for a child, the most important thing is to feel love and
affection from his parents. They do not yet have the experience of
knowing human behavior or why people do certain things. Their main
goal is to be loved, and this is, without a doubt, what every child
deserves.

Just because a child gets older and may begin to see dysfunction in
his or her family does not mean that this internalized message is
erased. That negative message of"I couldn't do any better, so I'm
not good enough" remains anchored.

These feelings have haunted me throughout my life. I've felt like I've
never been good enough and that I didn't deserve things. Very big
insecurities that have played an important role in my health.

You are enough: you just have to remember that

And I recently had to hear from my own father that I am a failure.

That I've ruined my life and that I could dedicate myself to something
serious instead of fooling around with that "shit" I do on the Internet.

Fortunately, I have been doing some very deep work on my inner self
for some time now. And I am discovering where my problems, my
perfectionism and my feeling that I will never be good enough come
from.

It is difficult, because we all want to believe that we come from

families full of love and care. What's more, the memory I have of my
father is that he has always said that I am the person he loves the
most and the most important to him. And I believed it. Until I realized
that they had been nothing more than words.

It is normal to try to deny it and rationalize and believe that it is all in

our head. In fact, it is easier to take full responsibility rather than
courageously stand up to your own truth and resolve your trauma.

But letting go of burdens that are not yours is the best thing you can
do. That's when you realize that the message was wrong.That it was
never your fault. That it has always been a distorted reality that
you had to take as true in order to survive in a dysfunctional and
most likely narcissistic environment.

It is only at that point that the deeply anchored message of"I'm not
good enough" can begin to loosen and you begin to feel relief. And it
does not mean blaming others. Nor arm yourself with anger or
resentment toward the source of your problems. But it is important to
understand it in order to be able to forgive. Above all, to be able to
forgive ourselves.

Be who you want to be. You are enough.

In this way, it is also possible to take responsibility that you can
change yourself as an adult. And be who you want to be and not
continue to be a definition imposed by others.

It's like carrying a big bag full of heavy balls, and none of those balls
are yours. As you recover, you remove the balls, one by one, from the
bag. And you throw them away to get rid of that weight off your
shoulders, realizing that they belong to someone else.

"This is not mine, I'm carrying my father's insecurities."

When you get rid of those balls, you can start to see your own reality
and define who you are.

And that's when you realize that, even though you've made a
mistake, as we all make mistakes, you're good.You're enough. You
deserve more.

When you realize that you were carrying the baggage of others on
your back, it opens a door to freedom, a path to hope, healing and
understanding. It opens windows to countless opportunities tocreate
the life you deserve.Because you are everything you are meant to
be in this moment.

Okay, the same thing happens to me. What do I do now?

It is very possible that you feel totally identified with what I have just
shared. And that you don't know what to do to get out of the loop.

My recovery protocol (and the one I design for my clients) consists of

care from different angles. Both dietary modifications and issues
related to the quantity and quality of sleep. As well as adequate
exercise,supplementation aimed at rebalancing the system and
reduction ofstress factors (physiological, biochemical and emotional).

And it is precisely on this last point that I have worked a lot. Starting
with the simplest. That is, eliminating more visible and easier to
control sources of stress until reaching beliefs and blocks that are
much more buried. Precisely those that are more emotionally
charged, such as what I have described above.

But remember that just as you take a shower and after a while you
will get dirty again, this type of inner work will also have to be
repeated on a daily basis. New things will come up along the way.
However, it will become easier and easier for you to see where you
are going and identify the source of your discomfort.

12 things to remember that you are enough

I don't want to say much more today. And if you've read this far,
congratulations! But I do want to share a few things I like to
remember whenever I catch myself thinking I'm not good enough.
And that help me defeat that negativity that creeps up on me.

1. Start with you

Self-esteem, self-respect, self-respect. These are things that no other

person can give you.

If you want to earn the respect of others, start by respecting yourself.

Love yourself as if you were the most special thing in the world.
Because you are.

You are responsible for valuing yourself. And this responsibility

means not letting others think, speak or decide for you. It means
using your own means to make things happen.

No one is doing it better than you because no one can do it better

than you.

YOU are walking your own path. Sometimes, we feel insecure

because we compare our life behind the scenes with that of others in
their great public successes. And that makes you believe that you
are not enough.

Forget what others are doing and achieving. Your life is about
breaking YOUR own limits to live YOUR best life.

3. Where you are now is where you need to be

Sometimes we want to avoid feeling exactly where we are because we

have a belief, based on our ideals, that it is not where we should or
would like to be. But the truth is that where you are now is exactly
where you need to be to get to where you want to go tomorrow.

4. Pain is good for something, even if you can't see it at the moment.

When the going gets tough, remember that pain does not come
without a purpose. Move forward and leave behind what has hurt
you. But don't forget what he taught you.

Pain is an intrinsic part of growing up and there are two types: the
kind that hurts and the kind that changes you. Try not to resist it
because it will help you grow.

5. For every thing you have lost, you have gained something else.

Be grateful for what you have today. Life doesn't have to be perfect to
be wonderful. In fact, it will never be perfect.
So trade worries for acceptance, regrets for lessons, and expectations
for gratitude. Life is too short and your story has too many chapters.

And one bad chapter does not make it the end. Stop re-reading the
bad guy andturn the page.

6. You have a choice: you can decide to be overwhelmed or to feel at

peace.

If you choose to be bitter, you will find many reasons to be bitter. If

you choose to be at peace, you will find many reasons to be at peace.

Are you good at feeling depressed? I'm sure you can be just as good
at feeling motivated and satisfied. Do it.You are enough.

7. Your suffering comes from resistance to the now

Happiness is being okay with your now, with what"is" instead of

wishing and worrying about what"isn't". Your now is what it has to
be. And the rest is nothing more than your arguments and
frustrations with life.

If you think about it, this means that you only suffer when youresist
the way things are. It is not in your power to control everything that
happens to you, but it is in your power to control how you respond
to the things that happen to you. (ReadThe Power of Now.)

8. What "could" be can only stop you if you let it.

Instead of worrying about whatcould happen, use your energy and

resources to deal with what is happening.

9. Step by step. There is always something you can do because you

are enough

There is nothing in your current situation that prevents you from

moving forward, one step at a time.

But remember that dreams without action are just that: dreams.
Therefore, vision must be accompanied byaction. It's not enough to
want to move forward, you have to take the steps to do so.

And all you need to do is to give them one at a time. Sometimes,the

smallest step in the right direction can be the biggest step of your life.

10. What you want to achieve is directly related to how badly you
want it.

If it's important enough to you, you can do it. When you're

committed and consistent, you'll get there.
In fact, success is not a matter of luck. Nor is it something magical
or mysterious. On the contrary, success is the result of directing
your focused attention towards what you want, constantly and
consistently.

Fatigue is natural. But you have to understand that the strongest

people are not the ones who always win. But those who do not give
up when they lose a battle.

11. The quality of your vision is the engine for the quality of your life.

You are the one who decides what you want and what you want to
focus on. Why think about what you don't like?

Focus on what makes you tick. If you see it possible, explore it. And
if you have a dream, live it.

If you are passionate and excited about what you do, you will always
have an edge that is hard to beat. Don't stop being that person. And
remember thatyou are enough.

12. You are stronger than your problems

When something bad happens to you, you have two options. Either
let it define you and allow it to strengthen you or let it destroy you.
The decision is yours. You are much stronger than you realize.

And while you may not yet be where you want to be,look how far
you've come. And be glad you're not where you used to be.

Repeat after me: you are enough

The wisest, most complete and most loving people you have ever met
in your life are surely those who have known defeat, misery or the
suffering of losing something or someone they love. And they have
been able to rise from the ashes of their own despair.

People who have experienced ups and downs, who have taken risks
and acted with passion. And also people who have learned to
appreciate and understand life in a compassionate way. And that
they were not born that way, but have been developing little by little,
with each step they have taken along the way.