This action might not be possible to undo. Are you sure you want to continue?
or another, ounce of energy will gradually flow in you until it accumulates pass a climax, then a sudden urge of doing silly things to know her happens. Before you know it, everything happens in a flash, and when you think back, you wondered how on earth did you manage to do or say something as retard. I am in similar hypothetical situation. I observed her since two days and for some diabolical reasons, something stuck me, whispering to me in telepathy mode that I have to know her. Must have one of Cupid's bow shot went haywire and got into me - my eyes never left her. She is petite and small, with long flawless hair. Her features were well defined - especially her eyes that captured my soul in the first wink I caught from her. She is not those drop-dead gorgeous model's style, but when she smiles and her two dimples creases into her cheeks deeply, nothing on earth is sweeter than her. Her charisma and the air that saturates around her is angelic and when I am near her, to close for comfort (it's simply stressing), she smelled like a walking conditioner. I have to know her, if I want this piece of dream to turn into reality. If it were something of my forte, it would have been as simple as snapping my fingers, but I had never approach a girl before. What do you expect from someone who studied in an all guys school since Primary One and not even a single sister at home? Female of similar age don't exist in my environment since I graduated from kindergarten, which was like years ago? Today is the last day of school, which means starting from tomorrow, two months worth of vacation began. Then, my chances of seeing her will be zero because she doesn't even stay near me; she stayed near my good friend, Jerry, private estate. Fate has enabled us to meet because two days back, because I have been going to Jerry's house and I would only see her at the bus stop. So everything needs to be done today! She is sitting in front of me and my mind is virtually blank, thinking of a good way to start a decent conversation with her. Then, the bus appeared into sight and my set my pulse racing - I am losing my time resources! The bus slowed down to a gradually stop and we both board it. I chose a seat near the back and sat down, watching her walked passed me and sat behind. A wave of uneasiness washed over me as I could even sense her gaze on my back. There was an internal war waging inside me as I am fighting against trying to walk over to introduce myself and to remain rational. Finally our stop came and we got down. She walked at a quickened pace, reckoning that I am stalking her
I guess she is gonna skin me alive.. you?' 'I waited for you to come online. fair and silky-like. we parted. so late still never sleep ar?' I heard my mum's voice lurking in the background. She smiled faintly and gosh. 'Why leh? Miss me ar? HAHAHAHA!' .. Then she said she had to leave and with a dumb smile reciprocating her sweet ones. Watching her gradually moving towards her block is unimaginable. that nearly sweep me off my feet. I looked back at her for one final time. Come on Cloud you could do it! OR you are gonna lose this chance forever!? A surge of false strength filled my veins as I ran towards her. I came home quite late and logging onto IRC and yes! She is there. Did I mention knocking onto the lamppost and actually apologized to it? It was two months since I knew her and we have always talk online. We exchanged numbers and I learned that she is not exactly local. Jerry told me to go after her.could get to know you and be your friend?? All the energy in me had expanded in this stuttering sentence I blurted. I can't let this final chance go by! She went through the gate of the estate by now and my mind is in state of desperation. Hi. but my heart doesn't want to sacrifice this stable friendship for now. Maybe because I had never had a girlfriend before and always have this phobia of relationship not lasting behind my head. She turned around. I delivered a light tap onto her shoulder. Her name is Yukiko.. I tried learning to be one.I. But when he stressed his point. Before I could catch my breathe for walking back home from the bus stop.was wondering if I. When I came arm length distance from her. My face is beginning to blush red with shyness as I waited for any respond. before running and yelling at the top of my voice that I made it.' Waited for me? Sometimes girls can be such cute little thing. Jerry said that guys must be sweet talkers and romantic. If my mum knew that I ate in school already. Words like these seemed like healing wards for the day fatigue. I am none of the above. well.behind.. which means snow in Japanese ?like her unblemished skin. I was. Five minutes went by and everything happened as smoothly as any successful mission. Every seconds is slipping passed me and beads of sweats broke out at strategic part of my forehead... she sent me a message. as if expecting all that would happen and gave me a curious look. Our relation are like good friends now. commanding me to finish the leftover food in the kitchen. 'Cloud. she is a half Japanese who came to Singapore to study. 'Just came back from school.
?' I always hated it whenever girls corner me with questions that neither YES nor NO is the right answer.it's getting common isn't it? Relationship are breaking up every now and then.' Somehow girls are very affected over things happening to their friends in matters of love. 'If they were meant to be together well. but hey. Couples not suited for each other being force to be together is a painful thing. it means that I can make use of this excuse to catch a movie with her! I am such a fast learner 'Ok! bye bye!' The next thing I see is the 'DISCONNECT' word on my computer.' 'Come on. demanded that I finish the food left for me. you could say that?' 'Then are we fated to know each other. Guys would normally tell them to move on with their life and stuff. Maybe people involved will find it longer than it seemed to be. they will be together right? Sometimes not being together is a good thing. I am such a dickhead. my mum with her pissed off face come knocking at my door. answer you another time. Just when I am stuck with her questions. so I know nuts about it. Grinning from ear to ear. but when it comes to relation. gif me a smile ok? I treat you movie next time.' 'Fate. I have never gotten myself a girlfriend. Maybe that's why girls always tell one another about their personal problem? 'Well. Hey. so long.? What happen?' 'My good friend just broke up with her boyfriend today. whereas they would share their pain and sorrow or cry with them.' 'Really. that's a good attempt. 'Cloud. I see you tomorrow ok?' Well. Err. . it seemed that the treating trick always works. I am moody today. Cloud. everyone talks about it.?' Fate to me is like a legend. I am a counsellor in school and people approach me for all kind of interpersonal relation problem. thank God about it. 'Cloud! You are finally here!' . rant about it. I have go off for now to eat supper. I skip my way to the kitchen. 'Hey.' 'You say wan ar.' Three months and you called that long? It's not even longer than a semester. Maybe that's why I have another point of view? But when it comes to myself.' 'I seen them come together and they have been together for 3 months plus.I know the laughter was just to cover my embarrassment.
doing stuff together and most importantly. so poor thing. if I am her.Tian ya he chu wu fang cao. People. its meaningless don't you think? Relation nowadays are going nowhere because people just want to be in a relation.I like it! Until maybe when the special one comes along. guys of these days are not looking for serious relation. It is like exposing yourself to danger through speaking. even though are emotional creatures. everything will just be a memory of what had taken place.' A Chinese proverb came into my mind . it won't lar. rather I am pretty early using IRC entering our usual chat room. I watch TOO much TV. whatever relation will be bland.they WANT someone to walk by them.' Don't know what to do? Make yourself happy instead of lingering in this sorrowful event? Sometimes I really wonder if woman are that dumb? Or is it love that is making woman a vulnerable creature? And what makes you think THAT it is love? Woman. in others. They are afraid to be alone . 'Yah I told her to move on with her life. What about you Cloud?' Me? How come the topic is about me now? I always avoid questions whenever it comes to me in revealing my inner self. but she loved him so much and she couldn't believe that he like someone else.' .' 'Why? Go get one?' . Without it. I don't mind being alone . Why cry wasted tears over a relation that was never meant to be yours in the first place? Human. in their first love. I don't even have a gf. Be it emotionally. betray the trust you given to them and you will have to go through this series of utter disappointment and sadness.' Well. It is like salt and sugar in cooking. whom you least expected it. grow together. but he ignore her. 'I don't want to get a gf for the SAKE of getting one. 'She cried you know. I will try my best to be with her.' 'y? something is wrong?' Ok baby.' All woman loves romance. People have to get to know and go through more relation before they could realise that who is the right one for them what. Really?. Ok I admit. sexually or physically. 'Me? What about me?' 'What if something like that happens to you?' 'Er. I am not late. after a period of time. my good friend tried to patch back with her bf today.looked at the clock and it says 10 pm. then that guy said that he likes another girl. No. this would be the catalysis to explode my innermost views again. love their lovers. I will also dunno what the do. they loved love. 'Cloud.
' Hooray!! I could see my happiness on the computer screen.' 'Aww. My fingers speed through the keyboard and finally stop at the last word. they would tell you they look ugly. such is mentality of a woman. signalling to my victory of words. 'Cloud.2. When you say that they look like toilet. ' From a close defeated battle. to guide her along. that why will also be like that. he retaliate and bites back.gone!' . its getting late. Oh @$$@! Have I just ruined my good impression? I discern its time to celebrate with Jerry about my first failure. She is too cute to stay single. I have eventually emerge the winner as I continue to chat with her for the next two hours. naturally cute and THIS is the reasons that stop me from jioing her . I want to stay single. '3.she is VERY naïve and this creates an impulse for me to protect her.1.' I have to leave too. how could cute girls like her possibly stay single? Guys will try all sorts of ways to get her and she would finally succumb to one. untainted and pure.' She is such a poor liar. Somehow. during these periods of knowing her. HAHAHAHA!' Why is it that I must laugh every time I attempt a MUSHY statement? A lousy cover for my embarrassment. I have to go already. no I am not cute. you say the other time you wanna treat me movie right?' Ok.Oh yeah. saying you look worst.ok I count to 3 and leave. I had never asked about the background of her family or sort. You are right Cloud. until the special one comes along too. Cloud you log off first. I loved to chat with her as she is way so different from all the other girls . I love the way she is. . She showed me the real innocence of a young lady. 'You make me blushed.'Oh wait. ok!' My mind was cheering and screaming in rejoice.I can't take advantage of her innocence right? 'Cloud. its almost 12 and my Cinderella has to leave. but we talk everything else. When you praise a girl pretty. 'I girl mah. I don't want you to see me go. All hail cupid for the golden opportunity! Ok.There was an unaccustomed silence after I type that paragraph.' I can't believe I am doing this SILLY business. my hypnotic statement has hinted her! YEAH! Lets watch movie together tomorrow ok?' Er.
not the show. I did not understand what she was saying. Hey. I bought another ice-blended mocha for her as she said she wanted the same. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------It was 8.Plaza Singapura. you never know when you gonna get hit by the ball in your face. Gradually. I am pro huh? HAHAHA! Smiling at my flippant words. I really meant what I said. its Ok. I commented on how gorgeous she looked today. After finishing our drinks. I guess it was just something to start conversation. was weird but comprehendible.40 pm and I was at Starbucks (20 minutes before appointment point) . anyway what matter most is who I am watching with. we will check it out later. I can never forget. She looked really shy and reply with a soft thanks.' 'So what movie are we watching?. It was comedy show and Jerry said that comedies is good way to remember a first date. Woah. Actually at times (lucky thing it wasn't frequent). but hey. At least she won't be crying while watching a sad movie and I had to cheer her up later. after we decide and made purchase for Shallow Hal. I waited. Her Japanese accent with little tint of singlish that comes along with it.I couldn't get to sleep on that day.' She blushed and I nearly died saying that sentence. totally excited about tomorrow's event. she gain comfort from my company and from chatting. especially when she smiled that I have this burning urge to pinch her cheek. Hiak! . she looked so cute. I was daydreaming about today's soccer match I played and started pondering over life issues and soccer. 'Sorry I am late. It is not polite to be late for a date for the first time anyway. Slipping my favourite ice blended mocha. I sense her presence .the smell. we made our way to the Cinema. Nevertheless. She is simply stunning and like a critical hit. I am just early myself. I simply love girls wearing skirts.' 'Nah. We chatted for a while . Going out with a girl? I had never been out with one before! Praying at my bedside sincerely that nothing will crewed up on that day. the location we suppose to meet. Life is like soccer. erm. more. I was stoned watching her coming. it grew some laughter in it. It makes them looked. more female.' 'It's ok. White spaghetti straps top with jean skirts. What load of crap! As I was trying to entertain myself to relieve some amount of tension in me. I looked up and saw her smiling and making her way towards me. although horror show seemed like a whole lot better option to me.Jerry told me to soften her up with the conversation as she will most likely be as tense as I am.
If I say no I am lying to myself. just like me laughing whenever I made mushy remarks. you!' My system was undergoing this contained stress and it is making me go nuts every time she throws questions like these to stumble me. I asked myself and the answer that came up doesn't seemed too good. 'Me?' I was trying to buy time as she nodded her head almost immediately. that is the real world.'Cloud. I always seen him talking to other passengers. I think I prefer. 'Don't be silly. 'What about you Cloud? Do you like pretty girls too?' THIS KIND of question AGAIN? If I said yes. Rosemary. without realizing that she is not what he thinks she looked like. which was my first fear. not bad ar.last time you both dunno each other wan right?' It was the bus driver and I nodded in faintly agreement with him and smiled my way through. Gawd! I need the best of both world answer. while I tried to reassure her that the world was still spinning and it was only a show. get to know her liao. I could see watery tears rimming around Yukiko's eyes. cute girls like. at the very least she understand the story. Oh man. Even though she never really answered my question. laughs and emotions and at the end of the show. the ultimate shallow guy. 'Boy ar. I think I am not gonna wash my hair today. while she giggled uncontrollably. He judged woman by appearance and in the end he got hypnotize by this guy who made him sees woman by their character instead of physical beauty.We recognized the bus driver. . I will appear **** shallow. I decided to sent her home by bus as I think this is the very least what a guy should do. but I love her reply. the second closest to handsome. the lead actress came into the picture and he fell in love with her. That's why I don't like good-looking guys.I am decent looking. do you think there are people like that?' Sure. We boarded the bus.' 'Why must guys like pretty girls?' I was momentarily taken aback by a sudden question.' I know that sentence was just to cover her embarrassment. The story is a mixture of hearts. We choose a seat at the far back and sat down 'This driver is always very chatty. What the hell? Well. I am not good looking . the same bus 171 where we always take . 'Well. of course.The movie is talking about Hal Larsen. She blushed and tapped my head lightly.' She shaped a smile from her lips.' My heart screamed another point of victory. We walked out of the Cinema and out of Plaza Singapura. 'Because human like to see pretty things? I mean you would like to see good looking guys too right?' 'But good-looking guys don't give me security. don't bother about him.
It's not good if I am being seen by my neighbours with a guy so late at night you know. Noooooooo.' What do you mean that's all? Oh dear. shield and depend. It's ok.Suddenly. but when is the right time? 'Cloud. I have to say something that she wants to hear or forever I will be condemn in her eyes. said that I am wasting too much time on a single girl. Finally her stop arrived and she had to align. the woman's men. she consulted me and I will be there to give my expertise advice.someone to guide. she told me she couldn't go out very often as her guardian is very strict .. after all life is too short to spend on one person.finally she is talking more about herself.' I looked at her origami made from bus tickets and wondered whether I should do something similar. we chatted everyday and each time I felt that I am slipping into this pit of angelic darkness called love. 'Cute? And you are a very good friend of mine. I decide to avoid the question using my avoidance tactics. peer evaluating time! Even though I speak easily to myself. not again? 'What do you think of me?. one for me. . I appreciate her effort though . every date has to part eventually right? I watched her fade into her estate and until I caught zero glimpse of her. someone to be there regardless of whether you two are together .. I am in LOVE with TODAY.' I nodded and finally relented. Her parents are overseas working. I am score an F9 for it. But the urge to reveal my feeling hasn't reached to such stage for desperation yet. Am I in heaven? I have nothing to give you. when it comes to expressing to HER. Well.' Oh no.' 'That all?. she took the bus tickets I was holding. We got down and I insisted in sending her all the way till her block. so I made this two heart myself. We are like one in-separate-able pair of best friend. leaving her all alone. which contribute reasons for her character.I thanked her. Look away first!' I did as I was told and after five minutes she hold my waist and put her fist onto my hands. I have something to ask you. One for you. Jerry. I should have just pop the question and leave the thinking to her.' Oh ! . I know she longs for my company like I longs for hers. Whatever problems she has. Maybe this is what true love is. For the next few months. Maybe next time I would.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------I arrived early as usual. Guess that I have to wait for tomorrow to see her again.'There is a lot of things in my heart that I feel about you. the effect of TOO much TV. but in this short span of time.' My first lie I made to her. but nevertheless her sparkling eyes never loses its glow. 'Cloud. that's what TV drama always show. I feel bad if you have to wait for me. We went into Mac and sat near the window seats. she allow me to go out tomorrow. again. I can't express it out. waiting for her outside Macdonald patently. this time about 15 minutes earlier. Must be the effect of those skin whitening Japanese beauty product.' Phew. Five minutes went by and I am starting ponder whether I should reply anything. her nick has quit IRC.' 'Ok. she stood in front of me. where we could look out towards the roadside. Maybe she needed a large sum of money. borrow from me and then disappear into thin air. But it was for good cause. 'Sure! What about your guardian? She allows you to go out?' 'Yes. 'Waited long?' 'Only about 5 minutes. I didn't know how to reply her smile and decide to leave it until she reply me with something else. Before I could reply with anything. Reckoning about her sudden wanting to meet me suggested motives. hiak. lucky thing I manage to come out with this marvellous sentence. we meet at Mac at Parklane ok?' '/me nodded her head. I noticed her face is getting fairer and whiter to the extend of being pale. . As I looked up. remember don't be so early ok?. with me. But regardless of what is it. As I was busy throwing impossible scenarios into the pictures to cease my tension.' Ok I have to go offline now. can we meet for dinner tomorrow?' Another date! Yeah I screamed literally at my computer scream as she is able to go out once more.' I smiled at her consideration for me. I want to let you know that treasure you a lot. I am beginning to learn the trades of using words. It seemed that after the episode of knowing her.
simple and sincere. The first intimate bodily contact I had with a girl back to back. Somehow. I noticed that she was looking at me with such mesmerizing effect that I nearly unbalanced myself 'Cloud. I was actually getting a little irritated when you stalked me.' She giggled out of a sudden and I wondered what she meant. It is not much. Sometimes I feel that she is the only person in the world that appreciate what I am doing . just like two hearts melted in one. I eat anything. I realize that you are different from other guys that wanted to know me. I tried to cheer her up a little as the topic she started were on the emotional side. Less than an instant. 2 packets of large fries.' I went to buy for her and decide upon Mac Nuggets Meal as she is a small eater. The sky is densely clouded and the breezes is strong. dumb or whatever!. just revelling in nature's enjoyment. silly. We finished our meals and were playing with our straws like little kids. but just nice enough for comfort. She seemed a little solemn today and I reckoned that if there is anything I could give in to her.' You eat anything. considering her lovable nature and attractiveness. What you mean?' 'Before those day when you wanted to know me. we got out and walked close to the shores where the waves roar in protest from the raging winds. I must have seen like a pervert or something to you right?. I spoke some joke and she giggled a little as we continue to our meals. I shall uphold my reputation. We spoke nothing. Reached in while moment. only ******* guys would do that and being a good guy. But then again. and must be fated that will know each other right?' Fate again. Why must woman always bring up the topic of fate everytime when it comes to relation of any kind? I nodded my head a little. 2 large coke and two boxes of 6-pieces nugget was on the tray as I carried them.be it stupid.'What do you want. Suddenly she position and lean herself on my back with her head facing up. I don't know what was the problem may be.' 'Oh really?. . but all my mind was telling me was to make her happy . 'Can we go somewhere where I could see the sea?' We took a taxi down to Marina Bay. We sat down side by side and watched the waves continual sweeping up the shores.' Good? What you mean good? You mean you want me to trick you to bed and after that meet about for sessions like this? Thinking back. till now. 'You are my best friend and appreciated it.' What? There are other idiots doing the same thing too? Oh well. I should give in. I looked into her eyes and her eyes seemed to tell me that she may have gone through a lot of in during these period. cute. I am NOT surprised. why are you so good to me?. I buy for you. I told myself never would I forget such day. but she always responded. looking at the nightly sky. As we had our little 'fighting'.
its nothing much.I have decide not to avoid it. I had to put on a brave front.. . its ok..' Actually I was wondering why she sobbed. Girls of her age needs their parents to be with them more than friends. rolling her vision between the sea and the sky before looking down.The sky is beautiful right?. Can we still contact through IRC?' I was hoping for a small miracle. in my mind. the I could feel a drop of water falling on my skin. I nodded my head to her question and her gaze move onto the rough sea. Well. is there something wrong?' She kept quiet. she isn't my girlfriend or something. I could see a layer of wetness in her eyes.' The atmosphere is getting intense and to make matter worst. 'Will you come and visit me if I ask you to?. Don't tell me all the fantasy I am having is coming to an end? If this was a dream. It is **** dumb and I don't understand why am I doing such acts .' We both got up and walked hastily towards the road in trying to catch a cab. 'Cloud.' 'Yes of course! I will!. I. would you remember me?. Even though I just had a shock from what she had just told me. and looked into me. but it seemed that maybe she wants to bring out something to tell me and I suspect it is nothing good. Then she stopped leaning on me.' Even though I am fighting inside.' Like a prick on bubbles. my gaze never left hers . your parents are over there and they worried for you. I can't demand her not to leave. I pray that I will never wake up from it. the merciless weather started pouring heavily. We studied each other gaze for a moment and after what seemed like eternity. it's going to rain.' I looked at the sky and to me. we could chat on the phone whenever we can and I think we better leave now. in the present moment. 'I don't think I have computer or internet connection at my house. Then.it won't block the rain from drenching her. My hands formed a tiny. have to go back Japan. 'Why? I will never forget you. all I thought of is to shield her from the chilling rain as I didn't want her to fall sick. As if a soldier going for war. little barrier and covers her head. 'I understand. it appeared as if it's going to rain soon. but halfway through. but at least I could still talk to her online. an internal implosion occurred within me.
bringing me the usual examination brain tonic . this brave front indestructible. drink this.' I actually managed to smile and kept this mask of mine.?' 'Tomorrow.heaven makes sport of men.2. there is this robust urge of seeing her every second.' ------------------------------------------------------------------------------Boy ar. Working through last year papers has driven me to the pinnacle of madness. rubbing her arms to gain some heat. My mind and soul won't be able to endure the parting scene.waiting for THAT day.Chicken Essence. reality is extremely cruel . Well.Then. I saw a coming taxi driving and I flagged it. I am suppose to tell you earlier. there was shelter to her house. After the scene at her estate and we promise not to look back at each other.1. I looked out of my room's window and thought of Yukiko. It's terrible! Would you see me off?. the scene would be unimaginable. we both just walk off to our destination and never look back ok? She nodded and I could see her tears closed to spilling out.' The next thing I knew. By the count of three.' She is right. like an awaken baby in the morning. again. Pinching lightly to fulfil my long awaited-desire. we should just keep this the last meeting then. but if I were to see her off. I never turn back to even have my last glance.' It was close to my June examination and my mum knocked and came into my room. she was in my embrace and I was stroking her soaked hair.the cab reached her place and lucky thing. we were in the cab pretty drenched. It remains on my face emotionlessly and dead. for some reasons. come. I think. I told the uncle to reduce the air-con to the lowest and put my arms around her shoulder. I gulped down the entire bottle and sat by my study table in my room. If she told me earlier. Gradually. My index finger teased her dimples a little as she felt tickled and ruffled her head in between my arms and chest All good things must come to an end . I feel that I already had my last glance when I spoke my last words to her. Her eyes were kept closed and my fingers travelled to her cheeks. but I can't bear to. 'You are so silly Cloud. As I . 'When are you leaving then. my feelings would be just like dying patients with the last stage of cancer .' In my heart. '3.' Tomorrow? Did I just hear wrongly? What's the rush? Sometimes. she opened her eyes. It has been a few months since I last saw or heard from her. I told the uncle to wait for a while and got out of the cab with her. perhaps it's better if we keep it this way.
I went online that day and see if she was there using another nick. literally. for not contacting me and making me so worried for her. Maybe she lost my number over there. The first thing I did was to told her to hang on for a moment and screamed at the top of my voice. maybe she is busy adapting to her new life. I don't know why she never contacts me since then. I can't use the phone here for very long too.' . Yukiko?? Is that you?' I was praying and gripping the phone hard. My happiness could not contain inside me and I need to release it. I controlled myself emotionally and force my tears back to its origin. hoping that a miracle could happen. you shall treat me movie the next time I see you. Boy ar! Your phone!' My phone? At such hours of the night? 'Hello?.' Actually. I went back to my books and paper and continue began working on it. Then I scolded her. our chats. the cuddle and every other tiny little details. For a guy's image. but no she wasn't. how you know it was me?. I can't allow such feelings to overpower me.' I smart what! Hey! I never hear from you SO LONG!' I emphasised on the words 'So long' as if I had never heard anything from her for few decades. I don't mind the duration of her calls . telling myself not to ponder over past issues as it may affect my exam performance. I know it already passed midnight. I rubbed my eyes a little and stretched. but somehow I had this feeling that it was her. 'How. but I know she has her reasons. the movie. or maybe she has forgotten me? No can't be! How can that be? How can the scenarios that have been taken place be so easily forgotten? The day I knew her. 'Sorry. but I finally succumb to my inner self and wanted to make sure I won't think back and regret on the fact that I never check whether she was online that day. the beach.' 'For making me worried and missing you so badly.I just wanted to hear her voice so badly. straws fighting. in gentle tone. 'Miss me?. dinner. the unexpected rain.' There was no respond.depart. Is this piece of dreamland meant to be only a dream? Tomorrow is the beginning of my exam.
I CAN'T WAIT ANYMORE! I want to see her so badly and life has been good to me. HAHAHA! We spoke on the phone and talked like old friends and the pressing examination stress seemed to have vanished. For the sake of going over. I tear opened and a letter fell out. Cloud. in amidst of studying. I got to go already. Hehz. tell me your address. Yeah I will see her soon! --------------------------------------------------------------------------------'Boy ar. I thank you God for giving me this chance!! HOORAY! *Days passed* Finally I am close to finishing my examination .?' 'Yes? You want me to go over? Ok sure. tell me your address?. Dear Cloud.' I jolted down her contacts in Japan and kiss it. but I love the surprises Cupid has in store for me. can't talk anymore. 'Cloud. examination?. remember that day when I ask you if you would visit me in Japan and you said you would. . provided I give her my words that my results will be good when it is out.' Take lots of care ok? I can't wait to see you soon!' You put down first Cloud. I was home. that is when?' Maybe 28 May or slightly later.Yeah. I examined the envelope and it wrote ' To Cloud' on the front. I don't want you to see me hang up on you. I was hoping in my heart that time will freeze so that we could chat till the end of time. she would pay for my tickets. determined to do well so that I could psycho my mum to pay for my trip.today is the last paper. My mum says that if I do finish this examination. everything is worth it. In preparation for the coming trip to Japan. I hurried my revision. Regardless. a letter for you. although my mind wandered on the thought of seeing her again. Then. I have been studying non-stop.' Next sat?.I used the same trick again. like all other days. Curiously. is there anything you want to tell me?.' With that a heavy heart our conversation ended as I put the phone down. I will go over right after my examination next sat. doing my revision. From morning till night. Before I put down.' Huh? A letter for me? I had never receive a letter addressed to me before. my mum calls for me and I guess it must be regarding the trip over. even though little setbacks filled along the way.
everything you did or said. Actually I broke the promise. You said you are not romantic at all. This distinct character could only be found in you and I want you to kept it that way for I like the way you are. shielding you like what you did. Perhaps it is just one sided. not the way you looked. or I am already in heaven watching over you. . I am feeling a little tired writing this letter. I did looked back. My operation begins on 24 May and I will call you maybe a week plus before to fulfil the promise you said you would come over and visit me in Japan.Before I began. But then again. The success rate of this operation is only 30% and anything could happen. No. and I told you I will also wait for mine. Cloud. but no wrong liking you what right? You told me you rather wait for the special one. it would be you asking me whether if I like good-looking guys. at least. very much. leaving my physical body. In this world. I guess I did. although you never express yourself to me. I giggled to myself every night after we chatted online and I began to ask myself if I fell in love with you. but I am determine to finish what I had to say. So I want to tell you that I appreciate your company. I love you. I apologise for not telling you everything about myself. if you receive this letter through mail send by my guardian. to protect me from the rain today. I hope that the cab could drive slower because I may not get the chance to cuddle in you again.it would have been you. But do not despair. in vain. leaving my suffering and of course. I knew that you are the one. but someone has to be the stronger one to console and reassure right? The reasons why I have to go back to Japan is because I am suffering from a rare case of a blood cancer that may claim my life very soon if it is not treated. I wrote this letter on the night when we parted and promise not to look back. that's why I ask you if you would come to visit me if I ask you to. My parents wants me to go back to take a major operation there because if this operation were to fail. By then you would know the truth and I could see you for the last time. it means that I am already gone. your advices. I would disappear from the surface of the world and they wants to be with me during this period. You may find a girlfriend by then. if there is one person I wouldn't want to see crying . because I feared that I may not have the chance to see you again this lifetime. just like Rosemary in the movie we watched together. you are the best a guy could be. I don't like them because I like guys like YOU unique and extraordinary. If there is one thing final question I want you to ask me. but to me. leaving this world. During the time when I was cuddling in you. I know you are putting on a brave front because as a woman I could cry and I know you would be there to console me. as I will always be around you.
I should not. Decisions. I was at the verge of mental breakdown. weeping silently to myself for the tears I owe her and for the lack of courage to express my feeling. 'Nope! She is with me. like a baby in crossfire. I never spoke much because I was hurt. I knew something is happening to me. I clutched my head tightly as trains of disillusioned thoughts sinks into my mind. my results were good. have cruel consequences regardless of which options I chose.27 May. most of the times. it arrived. all the time. I should not have delay the trip over. I was crying. I waited for the bus and soon. lying at the mercy of my ill-fated destiny. 'Eh boy ar. At the very least. disappointed and regretted beyond words. totally defeated. She was waiting for me to pop the question! And I never did! I should have fuc-king listen to Jerry. totally confused and helpless. why your girlfriend not with you ar?. her final days. Why DIDN'T I LEFT Singapore to Japan? I should have hack care about my examination to be with her. like a drama.' . made me sink deeper into this whirlpool of depression.' I smiled at him and pointed to my heart.although this could never happen and thinking of it. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As expected. I sat at the bus stop where I first saw her and every scene replay itself in my mind. I took it and realise that it was the same bus driver again. Clutching tightly onto the heart origami that she made. I was rooted to the ground. I recalled that she still owe me a movie treat . Since that day. at this time broke from my resistance barrier and roll down my cheek as I saw the date today . I could let her know HOW MUCH she meant to me and how much I loved her.Yukiko Tears I have been fighting back.
This action might not be possible to undo. Are you sure you want to continue?
We've moved you to where you read on your other device.
Get the full title to continue listening from where you left off, or restart the preview.