JAVIER COZZOLINO Goldfish 1 good thing though is, it's over, just as le things are over; the good thing is that net. Time is rubbish, but forgetfulness. Wherever yy only have a sear, may be now, hair. Not this lingering. Or . Ye h ler my left armpit. I kept everything’s going to be just fine. You not charge us a cent, off to the hospital. After he opened the door ur head. He didn’t know not ¢ without any further purpose. A w: is one of th oments, And When I saw you You know the story, when I was your saviow just did what the obstetrician told me to do, You were having ‘an apnoea, that’s why you looked blue and lethargic. I held the oxygen tube at the level of your uth, But I insist: I did just what I was told to do, I was no hero, I was just beginning to be your father. Shortly after r was holding the d One: that I knew you, that I had already met you before. T once had a natal chart made, I was unwell and the therapist, who was tre: e was even worse than me; I was very close was my fault, I am not sick, it was a long time n know your then. The therapist said me good. I am Aquarius with ascendant moon in Scorpio. W for some strange bodies, and it 1s, but yours and your id be a young soul has to going crazy ago, I did not in Aquarius and th astrologist told_me reincarnates in differen ofall of you, not your mum’ mother, according as She said that due to some indeciphe the ability to gather all of you around would be why I would were al not alive. I or that sort Iways pursues the ig of mine and is rail soldier dete: wearing a and a shiny sword) y. In the dream, I am sunssed my mind was that I ‘The second thing that c be unable to give you a were as 1 trage s going to we for him to acky, and it is lik appe to be so. one greatest certainties of my at T was doing at 4:30 pm at this old writing desk that used Passos, Dylan Thomas, and th he invoices icred Heart and the Mary Untier of Knots; what I was doing: an appalling report on the horseracing industry editor had sent me a PowerPoint by email, with data that were t quickly, if I don’t get obsessed, if 'm f hours, those kind of reports, and I T even wo of those he first hi ard for on tion of technical- ts. Anyway, that’s what T was doing when T blue. I said, not now, I need to youall heard your mother out of th finish this. But as is her habit, she igt ‘were coming and going with the blue buc As soon as the youngest one and number three pushed the h. You would suck the ai sister wo Nemo, nd Cars out, in that order, a Disneyland order, in my view even satanic. I hate Disney k you know. But no matter, What matters is that, fou were going to get hurt, or ft everything so you would not get hurt, ff a fucking report T was Dut also b yours and s my arms were worth your slash, Not being alive, if U prevented the many other hurts I c good father. I was not. It time. Neglecting you. Never negl money your work gives you. Never e your ten years of age, mon aaused you. I me ‘And here you have more than one evidence. I hope uture time where you are, your ideas catch fire, a a moral fire, even though it is only am your friends I did not see how it h no-longe ing up a graphic with and the fourt Buenos Aires breeds seven percent of the world’s total. That kind of hat is go data I was when I heard your scream, and imme your mother’s. “He needs to be takei There was a pool of blood. You were crying. gest in the world, About how the province of the racing thoroughbreds which I know notA couple of y the oute sgeries. A redeh: e: let m ident left us at than ago was not in this ease. I saw case, it was ical it. , she was the in two hundred m¢ icking goldi » was coming the other way red! your arms, I ist your ng, Summer was nearing, complicated) Later I found that Dr delay was strategic. Your grandm your grand be sew cleaned th asked me wi hear it, and they torrents it with ‘serum on ¢ muscle was kids are getting real b ter, now is getting 1° Doctor Sakurako.She was t You asked , wwe my eyes, T ¢ .cp, please don’t let go. me you lov y there wei nts you put your head under my my thongs were getting bent, my right hand was dre blood. rity bloke titute saw us at crashed int s, then drove o was at the w his hor glove cl in his left swore at a cc who was in front as he was able outside the main entrance to the hospital. There he got helped me out of the taxi and stroked your head. I don’t know his where he lives. that taxi driver, writing this is a Tis true th and running to the b becoming a saint, just as b stitching you up do Igo about 1g way, and when I do well I hav same degree 0 Je shafe in good condition. As good as this plant pot to my le c yy, which receives the ash of my cigarette. I also y bad temper, I don’t alway: hheroes in this story, that’s the taxi drive people to places for money the street nt ord and st hers are asleep be my is small, and I’m writing ‘were a letter. Where there's 2 gs V nd scrawny when she arrived at ed her, 1 , but you ly ever wept on my shoulder until that day. Once, when you were first operated on. You were three years old. Twas not grow it might have peration would be your spinal cord, your mother 1 ys € ‘we were heading f , while the surgery started For the si she was calmer, but she did it again. And she cric sister, who was about six months old 10 a bronchitis that w . We were in a corridor, as the doctors had told us to go -y were going to insert a needle through h feeling bad about inly duty to con that he should he more or less same I had told her. You still had your eyes closed. c I love her. She saved me from loneliness. From a horror movie, she save She never lefi_me, she when Twas not quite right was going crazy again, at the of our telationship, when the psychoactive med not have any effect_on me. your mother eautifia, fight with her, it’s because I'm s would not care so know how (o treat when she chooses to be. yelling starts, those spare you. But know this, etch everything. It is very ucky. If you find ‘without he to me was move away from I did. When Dr Sakurako go and get a Coke, smoke a ci that I had been living through badly Dut close enough, feeling bad to see that slash in your leg. Your mother said, Go. And I sai cd you, I did not need to say anything to you. You were with your mother, just e during the her, without my ¢ yet, because to these issues of decency and tradition and my hesitations, I had to decide whether I wanted to mary 1. T took days to res th you both, should be decidedejected, you came are strange, Dr Sakuraki sheet on your leg. Th assistant made took Dr Saku from the muscle to mutter some indise: antibiotic you orthopaedics an English surn okay, but it wa “In forty hours take some instructions for the ‘dus an him in oving the sweat o lefi hand, so “What are soon as Dr S: “Don’t Some guy asleep, c annoy be. Fm not blam shared past. ‘T e, some special perce trite and Pd Jy for anything, ng such things. We leav using very ¢ | n just without ever re at it’s all ab omes from, jot sure. One of t they kill i ming. Or times I don’t is weird J. Salavert c where to go wl than all this tty girls are comi ¢ wind st The girls still works. Your m