An Educational Skit: Shining UN Success

Storyline by Yibin, Shuangxing, Hanyang and Joshua

Screenplay by Enying and Not-That-Joshua

Narrator – Han Yang

German Guy – Shuang Xing
LON and UN – Shuang Xing
SWAPO – En Ying
PLAN – Joshua Ng
South African – Yibin

Narrator: In the 19th century, Germany attacked Namibia as part of its colonial expansionist plans

German Guy: (In German) Ihre ganze Unterseite sind gehören uns, schwarze arschloch!

Narrator: Soon after in World War I, South Africa attacks Namibia and conquers it for the land

South African: BANZAI! FIRETRUCK YOU!

(South African attacks SWAPO and PLAN people after pointing 2 index fingers at them, they scream)

(German guy jumps to spin around a full turn and does jazz hands to signify a change in character)

LON: I represent the LON. It is unequivocal to expound that South Africa can have Namibia.

Narrator: Unequivocal, adjective. To be admitting of no doubt or misunderstanding; having only

one meaning or interpretation and leading to only one conclusion. Expound, verb. To set
forth in detail.

Narrator: When UN is set up, they experience an abrupt change in policy from that of the LON and
decide that the Namibians deserve independence in 1966.

(LON Rep jumps to spin around a full turn and does jazz hands to signify a change in character)

UN: I now represent the UN. It is unequivocal to expound that South Africa cannot have
Namibia

South African: (Taken aback, in a surprised manner) What the firetruck? I don’t care, Namibia is mine!
SWAPO: EHH we want to rule our own people, you can go and eat da poo poo!

South Africa: I’m setting up an army so you guys can go firetruck yourselves.

UN: Come now, fellow inhabitants of Mother Gaia! This is no time for such belligerent
behavior! We must band together and embrace love and peace!

(UN lifts arms at a 45 degree angle on both sides and holds hands with narrator and PLAN spiritually)

Narrator: The UN proposes a ceasefire and UN supervised elections in Namibia in Security Council
435

UN: This is Security Council 435. Welcome to Security Council 435. The UN proposes a
ceasefire and UN supervised elections in Namibia. In Security Council 435.

SWAPO/SA: Okay.

Narrator: SWAPO’s People Liberation Army of Namibia, the armed division of the Organization
violates the ceasefire.

PLAN: MUAHAHA! I am a commander and SWAPO only accepted the ceasefire so I could fool
South Africa into letting down their guard! Man I'm so sneaky and clever.

UN: Firetruck this.

South Africa: I anticipated that! Now I will kill 375 of you with terrible dancing and god-awful singing.

SWAPO/PLAN: Firetruck this.

Narrator: 375 Namibian soldiers were killed and the conflict was negotiated and resolved by
SWAPO and SA with the help of UN

UN: (Puts arms over shoulders of SWAPO and South Africa and sings song)
♫ why can’t we be friends, why can’t we be friends ♫

Narrator: Soon after the UN's timely intervention, the conflict was resolved, and free and fair
elections in Namibia were held from 7-11 November 1989.

UN: The election is free and fair.

(Pauses in silence)
Democracy gives me a hard-on!
Democracy arouses happiness in me!
Narrator: Namibia drafted and adopted their national constitution on 21 March 1990. SWAPO was
reconciled with the South Africans.

(SWAPO, PLAN and SA put their arms over their shoulders and gyrate their upper bodies as in Avatar)

UN: And so, once again, the day is saved, thanks to the POWERPUFF UN!

Narrator: Although nearly 400 Namibian soldiers were killed, an intensifying conflict was
effectively resolved by the UN, and its original aim of letting Namibia achieve
independence from South Africa has been reached.

UN: Shining UN Success

(Arms up in the air shaking wrists, as in sign language)

[Curtain closes; wait for applause and standing ovation. Cast led by Shuang Xing walks out to receive
thrown roses or tomatoes]

* Ihre is pronounced Ee-le (As in Felony)

* Gehören is pronounced ghee-lio-len (As in Felon)