June 30, 2019

Experiential Learning Reflection

It was not in my original plan to be a small group leader this year. During my sophomore

year I volunteered for various leadership events for AACF, and as my leadership involvement

increased, it seemed natural to apply for a more fixed leadership position for the following year.

The thought crossed my mind and I even started an application. However I never submitted a

request to be on the “core” team, deciding that I couldn’t commit to that level of commitment

and responsibility quite yet. But one day in early August I got a message from Esther. Having

just flown out of Peru, I was riding in a shuttle from the airport to the Mexican town I would be

staying for the next few weeks. Esther is a member of AACF who this year acted as the small

group leader coordinator. She messaged me to ask if I would be a small group leader for this

school year. It surprised me, especially because the core team is finalized each spring. But one of

the new leaders decided to withdraw, leaving an open spot. I thought about it and reached out to

a friend of mine that had been a small group leader the past year. That friend encouraged me to

give it a try; she was confident that I would be great. I let Esther know that I accepted her offer,

and that is how I became the women’s small group leader for UW’s Asian American Christian

Fellowship.

Looking back, I’m happy that I decided to become a small group leader. Considering I

never formally applied, I’m fortunate to have been given the opportunity. As a small group leader

my responsibilities included meeting with other small group leaders, designing “lesson plans,”

and facilitating weekly meetings for my small group. Meeting with the other small group leaders

was actually one of my favorite aspects of the position, as I got to know some amazing people

that I had seen many times but only occasionally interacted with. The weeks’ plans followed a

quarterly small group theme that we set, and the plans included relevant bible verses, discussion
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questions, and activities. I enjoyed doing the prep work, and it was nice having flexibility to

cover topics that applied to the small group. Developing relationships with my small group

members was the most essential part of my role as a small group leader. A small group leader

must be a supportive figure for their members. Getting to know my small group was great, and I

loved seeing them grow throughout the year.

My main objective as I approached my role was to create a safe and supportive space for

my small group. I never wanted anyone to feel unwelcome or uncomfortable at our meetings.

This was especially important given the personal nature of many topics and stories that would be

discussed. I believe that this goal was achieved; it was encouraging to see my small group

members open up about personal experiences and struggles. And as a group we were able to

comfort each other as well as celebrate successes.

The hardest part of running a small group was worrying if I was providing what my

group members needed and wanted. And having low turnouts increased the worry, as I couldn’t

help but feel that I wasn’t doing a good enough job. Certainly I understood time conflicts and

busy exam weeks, but it was still disheartening. There were many weeks in which only one

person would attend the small group meeting, and while that offered a great opportunity to build

a relationship and dive into deep conversation, it was hard not to think that I must being doing

something wrong.

Thankfully I had a great support system. My small group members were very

compassionate and encouraging, and I often got advice from my friend that had been a small

group leader the previous year. Esther my supervisor was also a great resource, and she assured

me that low attendance was not unusual, nor a sign of failure. It was comforting having many

individuals cheering me on.

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Leading a small group was a large responsibility, but I loved the experience. It was great

to have more involvement in the community I’d been with since my first year at UW. And

through this role I was able to form many new relationships, as well as strengthen existing

relationships. Additionally, my confidence increased tremendously as I realized that I was

capable of leading a small group, despite what sophomore-year-Stephanie thought when she

deleted her leadership application.