Running Head: IDENTITY FORMED WITHIN THEORIES 1

Identity Formed Within Theories

Tiffany W. Morrissey

Northern Illinois University

November 2016

Identity Formed Within Theories

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Upon reflection, ones eyes come to see how lived experiences have shaped identity and

continue to play a role in growth and development. This awareness allows for continued

reflection and an opportunity to make sense of and take ownership in who we are. As we tell our

stories, it becomes clear that lived experiences affect us each in different ways, thus reaffirming

that we are unique individuals with diverse perspectives. This individualism is critical to the field

of higher education in that practitioners need to be aware of the variety of ways in which

students come to be and that these lived experiences shed light onto the ways in which higher

education is approached by each.

The purpose of this paper is to provide an analysis of my digital story by demonstrating

that development theories discussed in class are relevant to the field. My story embeds social

class, race, transition, self-authorship, and psychosocial theories, all of which play a role in my

identity formation and subsequent view of the world. An overview of each theory will be

presented followed by a description of how specific lived experiences from my digital story

relate to that theory. Applications regarding the digital storys validity in terms of learning about

student development theories will then be discussed prior to the conclusion of this paper.

Social Class and Race Identity

First-generation, low-income/poor, working-class students are generally grouped

together as one social class identity and middle-class, upper-class/affluent students as the other.

Such identities are not described as a developmental process per se, but social class standings do

attribute to identity formation (Patton, Renn, Guido, and Quaye, 2016). Social reproduction, a

theory by Pierre Bourdieu, argues that education causes ones position on the social class ladder

to remain as such, thus perpetuating inequity, marginalization, and inequality within society

(Patton et al., 2016). I can relate this to my upbringing and experiences within my eventual
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employment as a teacher. Additionally, Rowe, Bennett, and Atkinsons White racial

consciousness model (WRCM) brings justification to eye-opening experiences during my

undergraduate program and subsequent employment as a teacher as well. This social class and

race theme of my digital story can be seen within the first three minutes and twenty seconds of

the film.

I grew up in somewhat of a juxtaposition, as I was part of a low-income family that

resided in an upper-class suburb, resulting in my identifying as an outsider due to my social class

status, though my Whiteness generally allowed for feelings of inclusivity. I carried this outsider

identity throughout my upbringing and ultimately chose to not be part of the status quo (aka, the

popular social scene) and surrounded myself around people of the same socioeconomic

background as myself. I essentially defined myself through who I was not, a conclusion derived

for one participant in Abes and Jones 2004 study on multiple dimensions of identity in which

identity can be formed through opposition of who one is not or does not want to be (Abes, Jones,

& McEwen, 2007). Hence, I did not enter college upon high school graduation, as I thought I

needed a break from the stuffy White world I was engrossed in all those years. As noted in Patton

et al. (2016), low-income students lack collegiate information and financial prowess even if

encouraged by parents to attend. This is ultimately why I did not attend college immediately, as I

did not have a sense of collegiate direction, yet my wealthier peers possessed economic, cultural,

and social capital and therefore transitioned to higher education while I transitioned to hourly-

wage jobs. Experiencing the wage gap due to my lack of a college degree is what prompted me

to attend college and further exemplifies Bourdieus notion that cultural capital, or lack thereof,

determines ones selection of college type (Patton et al., 2016), mine being that of a community

college.
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I also became aware of how social class and race play in identity formation upon working

within Chicago Public Schools. I came to recognize that though I was of lower socioeconomic

status than my peers growing up, I was still awarded excellent educational opportunities and

reaped the benefits of White privilege. I witnessed within the CPS system that students in

primarily marginalized sections of the city, representing low-income, non-white populations,

were not provided with the same resources as those in more affluent, white neighborhoods. I

became witness to the social inequities that educational policies placed on these classes and

races, and continue to see such prevalence in my current field as a teacher of adult basic

education. Working with students who have been disenfranchised and not afforded the

opportunity for upward mobility confirms Bourdieus theory of social reproduction. It also

brought forth exploration of my own racial identity, resulting in my now-known place within

Rowe, et al.s White racial consciousness model (as cited in Patton et al., 2016). Because of my

lived experiences, I have been able to accept my White privilege, both frustrated and grateful for

it, landing me somewhere between a reactive and integrative racial attitude in which I am aware

of the inequities that exist and the systemic roots therein, though I cannot say I am proactive

regarding my desire for social change except to share my knowledge with others.

It is within such a strong foundation of binary societal values, the haves and have-nots,

that the identities of oppressed and marginalized students come forth in what they believe they

possess in terms of opportunity and choices within education, jobs, and society. As society

continues to define ones social class and race as aligned to certain ways of life, identities form

around such values and educational pathways are followed. It is critical to be aware of how these

identities are understood and treated within higher education, to be discussed further in the

applications section of this paper.

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Transitions Framework and Theory

Nancy Schlossbergs theory of transitions outlines three types of transitions individuals

experience throughout life. Defined as anticipated (occur predictably), unanticipated (not

scheduled to occur), and non-events (expected to, but do not occur), Schlossberg further regards

transitions as self-perceiving in that a transitions existence is ultimately defined by the one

experiencing it (Patton et al., 2016; Anderson et al., 2012). Generally speaking, however, a

transition is a turning point in ones life that results in a change while also affording opportunity

for growth or transformation (Anderson, Goodman, & Schlossberg, 2012). An individuals

reaction to a transition varies depending upon the point in which the transition is being

experienced, as one is either moving in, through, or out of it. I have, in my thirty-five years,

experienced all three types of transitions, the most significant ones in the last five years, of which

were catalysts to my entering graduate school.

As noted in my digital story, before I transferred to Roosevelt University, I got married,

an anticipated transition. Though moving into this transition did not constitute much of a daily

life change for me, it did add a label onto my identity that I had to get used to and normalize.

While in my first two years of college at Truman, I was attached yet unmarried, but at Roosevelt,

I entered as a married woman. It is as though I was a new person because I had a new legal

designation and role in society, that of married and wife, no longer holding on to my maiden

name. As was earlier mentioned, I was within the nontraditional designation in college due to

my age. This outsider identity intensified once adding married to the mix, as I was in a much

different stage in my life compared to my younger classmates, and therefore experienced college

in a different way than they did. I was very non-participatory due to my having a more

meaningful life outside the confines of my university.

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Two unanticipated events occurred several years after graduating college, but ultimately

forced me to view life differently than I previously had. The death of my mother when I was

thirty, she sixty, and then my father-in-law just over a year later certainly prompted me to grasp

at who I was in a world without these two people. Its impact pushed me to reflect upon and

ultimately question assumptions about my mother and my upbringing, leaving me reeling for

answers to questions I would never be able to ask her. As I coped with these unanticipated

transitions, I knew I needed to move out of the transition, which is what led me to leave the city

and settle in the suburbs, as I was ready for a change and fresh start and supported my husbands

newly acquired roles of a fatherless man and son to a widow, wanting to be near his mother

while she coped in her new role as well. Not only was I grappling with the end of my life as a

daughter to my mother, I was also entering a new life as a motherless woman at thirty, which was

not common among people in my social or work life, again leaving me feeling different from

those around me.

The final transition, that of a nonevent, has proven to be the most significant and life-

altering transition I have experienced thus far. After having tried to start a family for over year, I

was diagnosed with infertility, a diagnosis whose impact left me with profound questioning of

who I was in this life. I wanted to portray this in a powerful manner within my digital story,

presented at three minutes and fifty seconds, which is why I presented a realistic definition of

infertility for viewers to read instead of my speaking during that frame. Trying to maintain

societal pressures via my psychological, social, and functional age (Anderson et al., 2012) of

childbearing years triggered me to scramble for ways to produce for societys requirements. I

was at a major crossroads, representing a critical point in the process of self-authorship.

Self-Authorship Theory
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Ultimately, this crossroads aligns with participants in Baxter Magoldas (2009) study

whom of which encountered shipwrecks after college (p. 630), part of the self-authorship

process, which becomes stable in ones thirties (Patton et al., 2016). Feeling like an outsider yet

again, I followed formulas and listened to external voices upon my diagnosis by engaging in less

invasive medical intervention practices, attending support groups, and researching my heart out.

I eventually had to reevaluate what was right and true for me. This is one of Baxter Magoldas

crossroads phase, listening to my internal voice, which was quickly followed by the second

phase of cultivating my voice. I felt triggered to reexamine who I was as a woman and wife who

would not have children. It brought about concerns of my expected role and my lived role as

well as questions about marriage and what such a union meant when it did not include children.

Through research and engagement in Eastern medical practices, I was able to make sense of the

social constructs that deem women in their thirties as supposed to have children. I had an ah-ha

moment that essentially went like this: Wow, this is all made up. This is all imaginary. Society

perpetuates people to believe certain things and ways of life that are deemed correct. Though

only portrayed in my digital story for about forty seconds, this transition was actually a two-year

ordeal that I would say I am still not completely healed from. Abes and Hernandez (2016) points

to Baxter Magoldas complex identity construction in that it requires the capacity to live

according to self-chosen values and beliefs, enabling a person to internally develop a sense of

self rather than relying on external influences for self-definition (p. 103). A newly defined

sense of self was the result of my infertility and my subsequent choice to not pursue having

children in any capacity. This new self is still being defined in graduate school, in which

psychosocial development is playing a role.

Psychosocial Identity Development

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Chickering and Reissers work regarding developmental vectors in college and

educationally influential environments (Patton et al., 2016) align with my graduate school

experience, as portrayed in the final portion of my digital story. As a graduate student in my

mid-thirties who is interested and motivated in establishing a firm sense of self in this socially

constructed world, academia this time around has proven to be very personal and intimate for

me. While trying to discover more about myself in conjunction with who I want to be

vocationally, psychosocial identity development is on point. Two vectors, developing mature

interpersonal relationships and establishing identity, hold true in my continued development

within my graduate experiences. I have, though not represented in my digital story, often

struggled with establishing relationships with other people, especially women, as I always found

women to be very competitive and phony. I have always sought out depth and intellectuality in

my relationships yet was rarely able to find that. I have found that at NIU, however, and am

thrilled to have established several solid and supportive relationships, especially with other

females. At the same time, I have been able to recognize and accept that the differences among

women are ultimately aiding in my own identity formation and understanding of the varied

perspectives about the role of women, motherhood, and relationships. In this, I am also

recognizing that people are accepting of who I am, and that they see me under all my sarcasm,

insecurity, and uncertainty as I continue to stabilize my identity. Additionally, graduate school is

where I am hoping to develop purpose in my vocation, a sixth vector by Chickering and Reisser.

Finding mentorship in classmates and professors leaves me confident that my sense of identity

and purpose in life will come to fruition.

The educational environment, particularly the curriculum, I have been engaged in has

offered a robust opportunity to understand social constructs and the way in which policies and
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practices have perpetuated the marginalization and oppression of certain populations. It has

allowed me to grasp a better understanding as to why things are the way they are, something I

have struggled with throughout my life. My eyes and mind have been opened wider than ever

before, and though all of this knowledge can be overwhelming and frustrating, it does leave me

with a sense of ease in that I have the ability to think with critical complexity and have a depth of

knowledge that many others do not and may not ever. Such a curriculum has also motivated me

to consider what I can do with the knowledge I have gained, as I find enjoyment in sharing what

I have learned with others and would like to teach it formally. It is with this psychosocial

identity development in my graduate school that I have been afforded the opportunity to further

make sense and meaning of what I potentially want to do once I graduate.

Applications for Practice

The digital story assignment itself is a notable application of theoretical practice in that it

allowed for robust self-reflection and recognition of the various types of development endured,

proving that the theories learned about are not linear but occur in salience dependent upon

context. The creation of the story from the eyes of lived experiences yet with the requirement of

aligning and incorporating theories learned and discussed in class heralds this assignment as

valuable. Viewing others digital stories exemplifies the importance that students approach

learning and life through diverse lenses and that individuals manage experiences differently. It

also shed light on the fact that we only know our own truth and that making assumptions or

generalizations about others is not fitting.

With that being said, working as a practitioner in higher education requires a code of

ethic and care in which students are viewed as individuals with valid and noteworthy lived

experiences that continue to be part of their identity development. It is crucial to provide safe
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and motivating learning environments that are equitable and allow for critical thinking and peers

coming together to learn from one another. Chickering and Reissers theory that I previously

described is one to apply when working in higher education. The digital story assignment

encompassed the validity behind the theory of vectors and educationally influential environments

and demonstrated the learning and growth that can take place among diverse individuals.

Additionally, this assignment demonstrated the reconceptualized model of multiple

dimensions of identity. While my story covers life-span rather than a focus strictly on

undergraduate education, it is evident that my identity is derived from a mix of theories and are

based in context and salience. The same can be said for the stories of my peers, as identity

development begins early in life, is influenced by life experiences, external and internal factors,

and redevelops over time. What one identifies with, or as, changes as meaning making takes

place and alternate perspectives are uncovered. Abes, Jones, and McEwen (2007) attest that

identities salience varies depending on contextual influences and the changing meaning

individuals make of these identities (p. 15). What is critical to recognize is that this assignment

allowed for students to uncover who and what has shaped their identities, resulting in a new

awareness of the process as it is occurring and being able to engage in continued reflection in

sense making and further identity development. Such an awareness opens the minds of future

practitioners as they work with future students in higher education.

Conclusion

The relevance of student development theories was made clear in the digital story

assignment. Given an opportunity to further reflect upon and understand how one constructs an

identity justifies the need for theories and research in development. Though identity formation is

nonlinear and the stories told can be revised and retold throughout life (as cited in Abes et al.,
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2007), it is evident that practitioners in the field of higher education ought to be aware of the

diverse ways in which students make sense of who they are. Creating safe and comfortable

environments in which students feel at ease to express themselves and share opinions and

perspectives is optimal in fostering continued growth and identity stabilization.

Though I spoke of several theories in this paper, I do believe there are more that have

played a role in my continued identity development. The salience differs so I chose to only focus

on those that attributed more to my identity formation. It is clear via my self-reflection that I am

a continued work in progress and that I hope to feel a strong sense of self in the coming years, as

the past few have been inundated with life-changing transitions. It is with great

acknowledgement that I warrant graduate school as a very personal, provocative, and intimate

chapter in the book of life that I script.

References

Abes, E. S. & Hernandez, E. (2016). Critical and postcultural perspectives on self-authorship.

New Directions for Student Services, 154, 97-108. doi: 10.1002/ss.20178

Abes, E. S., Jones, S. R., McEwen, M. K. (2007). Reconceptualizing the model of multiple

dimensions of identity: The role of meaning-making capacity in the construction of

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multiple identities. Journal of College Student Development,48(1), 1-22. doi:

10.1353/csd.2007.0000

Anderson, M. L., Goodman, J., Schlossberg, N. K. (2012). Counseling adults in transition:

Linking Schlossbergs theory with practice in a diverse world. (4th Edition) New York:

Springer Publishing.

Baxter Magolda, M. B. (2009). The activity of meaning making: A holistic perspective on

college student development. Journal of College Student Development, 50(6), 621-639.

doi: 10.1353/csd.0.0106

Patton, L. D., Renn, K. A., Guido, F. M., & Quaye, S. J. (2016). Student development in college:

Theory, research, and practice. (3rd Edition) San Francisco: Jossey-Bass.