Nguyen Hoai Phung

EFK16 Class B
Student ID 1657010231
*I want to tell you that I listed the complex/compound/mixed sentences by
italicizing them for all of my writings.
UNIT 1
FIRST VER.
One Pillar Pagoda
When speaking of Ha Noi, people usually think about Ngoc Son Temple, The
Huc Bridge, West Lake and so on. Its really a big shortage if you dont mention
the One Pillar Pagoda a historic Buddist temple, the symbol of Ha Noi, the
capital of Vietnam.
The temple is located on One Pillar Street, Ba Dinh District. It has only one
compartment, called Lotus Calyx, lying on a stone pillar. Therefore, people
named the temple One Pillar Pagoda. The temple was built with wood and
theres a Guanyin Bodhisattva statue inside to worship. This structure includes
one square lotus calyx, each edge is 3 meters long, positioned on a four-meter
pillar. The Lotus Calyx has two dragons waiting pearl on the top of the tile roof
with four bended angles.
According to the legends, in 1094, King Ly Thai Tong dreamt of seeing
Guanyin Bodhisattva and then he decided to build the temple based on the
design of Monk Thien Tue. In 1105, King Ly Nhan Tong asked to mend the
temple and build two white china tower. In the 1840s, the temple was restored
and the next time was in 1922. On 10th Septemper 1954, before withdrawing
troops from Ha Noi, the French expeditionary force set a bomb and destroyed
the temple. Then, the temple was rebuilt in 1955.
Today, the One Pillar Pagoda becomes a tourist attraction in Ha Noi. On
occasions as festivals, holidays, a lot of people come here to pray for their lives.
On 10th October 2012, the temple was recognized as the temple that has the
most special design by Asian Record Organization.
FINAL VER.
When speaking of Ha Noi, people usually think about Ngoc Son Temple, The
Huc Bridge, West Lake and so on. Its really a big shortage if you dont mention

the One Pillar Pagoda a historic Buddhist temple, the symbol of Ha Noi, the
capital of Vietnam.
The temple is located on One Pillar Street, Ba Dinh District. It has only one
compartment, called Lotus Calyx, lying on a stone pillar. Therefore, people
named the temple One Pillar Pagoda. The temple was built with wood, and
theres a Guanyin Bodhisattva statue inside to worship. This structure includes
one square lotus calyx, each edge is 3 meters long, positioned on a four-meter
pillar. The Lotus Calyx has two dragons waiting pearl on the top of the tile roof
with four bended angles.
According to the legends, in 1094, King Ly Thai Tong dreamt of seeing Guanyin
Bodhisattva, and then he decided to build the temple based on the design of
Monk Thien Tue. In 1105, King Ly Nhan Tong asked to mend the temple and
build two white china tower. In the 1840s, the temple was restored and the next
time was in 1922. On 10th September 1954, before withdrawing troops from Ha
Noi, the French expeditionary force set a bomb and destroyed the temple. Then,
the temple was rebuilt in 1955.
Today, the One Pillar Pagoda has become a tourist attraction in Ha Noi. On
occasions as festivals, holidays, a lot of people come here to pray for their lives.
On 10th October 2012, the temple was recognized as the temple that has the
most special design by Asian Record Organization.
No
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1
2
3
4
5
6

Criteria for assessment

Information about the subject

Description of the subject
Description of the setting
Events in time order
Well-organized paragraphs
Grammar : changing verb
tenses
+ Use simple past, not
present perfect, after past
time markers
+ Use simple present to
describe the situation today.

Component
Score

Your scores
(selfassessments
)

1
1
1
1
1
0.9

0.3

0.3

+ Use present perfect tense

correctly

0.4

Use a variety of strong,

specific verbs.

Official
scores
(Teachers
assessment )

Teachers
comments

9
10

Use target words in the

narrative (each word account
for 0.1 point)
Arrange information and
ideas coherently
Use cohesive devices
effectively