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Shenouda Boutros
201015250
In todays western culture divorce has become very common and cultural
norms that once upon a time restricted divorce, no longer play an inhibitive
role. Marriage is seen as a private affair between two couples, or worse yet,
in the reigning of therapeutic worldview, marriage is seen as a means to the
individuals achievement of fulfillment and personal wholeness.1 Such a view
of marriage will determine the ethics concerning divorce or the ending of a
marriage. This essay will focus on understanding the nature of marriage and
according to the New Testament writings in order to understand the words of
Jesus, I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for unchastity, and
marries another commits adultery (Matthew 19:9).
In these few verses the Lord articulated much about the nature of marriage.
He spoke of the ideal nature of marriage before the fall of man and the
subsequent corruption by sin. Jesus pointed back to the creation story found
in Genesis, explaining that God created humanity as male and female: So
God created humankind in his image, in the image of God he created them;
male and female he created them (Genesis 1:27). Jesus framed his
discussion of marriage on the important foundation that God created mankind
as two different but complementary sexes and that marriage is founded on
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these two different sexes. The creation order is that from the beginning of
creation God made human beings male and female. Because of this duality
of the sexes, a man will leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife.4
Jesus brought the attention of the Pharisees to this very important point that
marriage is something planned by God from the beginning of creation and by
its nature, according to His plan, is the union of the male and female person.
Marriage, then, is Gods design from the beginning, when He formed man as
two different beings; and the difference is sexual.5
Jesus went onto say, For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother
and be joined to his wife (Mark 10:7). Here the Lord referred to Genesis
2:24, Therefore a man leaves his father and his mother and clings to his wife,
and they become one flesh. It is because of this difference in sexes that a
man should leave his father and mother, that is, his family and is joined to his
wife, in order to start his own family. In essence male and female are joined
together in marriage precisely because they are male and female. It is a
noteworthy point that God differentiates the human person based on sexual
difference, however no distinction is made between a Greek, black, white or
Jewish man, the only distinction is between male and female.
Jesus made a clear distinction between male and female, but their
complementarity is emphasized when the Lord said in Mark 10:8 and the two
shall become one flesh. So they are no longer two but one flesh. It is clear
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that male and female, who although different, based on sex, are
complementary and in marriage are united to become one flesh. This
understanding of difference and complementation to make one flesh is
highlighted in the Genesis story by the fact that Eve is created from the flesh
(rib) of Adam. John Chrysostom commented on this saying: And see how He
saith, He which made them at the beginning, made them male and female,
that is, from one root they sprung and into one body came they together, for
the twain shall be one flesh.6 From the beginning we get a sense that God
created man not to be alone but united, male and female different but one.
Importantly the nature of marriage as intended from the beginning is between
one male and one female, not between a male and a male or a female and a
female or male and several females. Clearly polygamy was never part of the
nature of marriage nor was same sex. John Chrysostom eloquently writes:
But mark Him arguing strongly not from the creation only,
but also from His command. For he said not, that He made
one man and one woman only, but that He also gave this
command that the one man should be joined to the one
woman. But if it had been His will that he should put this one
away, and bring in another, when He had made one man, He
would have formed many women.7
Witherington gives a similar contemporary understanding:
Jesus argument, then, seems to be as follows: God in creation made two
distinct but complementary human genders. God then also brought the two
complementary genders together in marriage. No third party is allowed into
this relationship. 8
St. John Chrysostom, Volume X Homilies on St. Matthew, in The Nicene and
Post-Nicene Fathers: first series, edited by Philip Schaff. (Grand Rapids, Michigan:
WM.B. Eerdmans Publishing company, 1989), p. 382.
7
St. John Chrysostom, Volume X Homilies on St. Matthew, p. 382.
8
Witherington, The Gospel of Mark, p. 277.
The emphasis that the two different sexes become united into one flesh
expresses the idea that although the two sexes are different, they are equal
as they become one. In the second Genesis story this is clearly expressed:
Then the man said, this at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; this
one shall be called Woman, for out of Man this one was taken (Genesis
2:23). This verse highlights the equality between man and woman as Adam
emphasized that the women was of his own flesh and therefore equal. Farley
explains that in Hebrew the term translated into women is ishah. The -ah
is the Hebrew feminine ending for nouns, so that Adam pronounces her to be
an exact replica of himself, with the difference that she is feminine.9 Thus
this may be understood in a way that male and female were created equal
with shared authority.
This equality is also expressed in the first creation story, Genesis 1:27
So God created humankind in his image, in the image of God he created
them; male and female he created them. Without going into a discussion on
what is meant by the image of God, it is clear that both male and female
equally possess the image of God. Farley comments: Here we note that
male and female equally share Gods authority as co-rulers over the earth.10
It is often argued that the second Genesis story shows that Adam is superior
over Eve as he names her and she is referred to as his helpmate. However
this does not mean that Adam is superior to Eve, but rather it shows that she
A common argument for Adams superiority to Eve is that she was created
from his rib. However it must be pointed out that Adam had no role in the
creation of Eve, it is written that he was put into a deep sleep, so he clearly
had no part in the creation of Eve. Also the Hebrew word for the usually
translated rib is tsalah, meaning side. The thought here is not of God
taking a spare part from Adam which he could well do without (whats one rib,
more or less?), but of taking an aspect from him, part of his very self.13 This
would make Eve equal to Adam, not inferior to him. What may be understood
then is that any subordination of Eve to Adam is not of an inferior to a
superior, but as Farley puts it, the loving and voluntary subordination of an
ontological equal.14
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The understanding of equality between husband and wife and the requirement
to submit to one another is also found in 1 Corinthians 7:4, For the wife does
not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; likewise the
husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.
In this passage Paul again explained the necessary the voluntary submission
of both the husband and wife to each other, which implies the inherent
16
Oden ed., Ancient Christian Commentary on Scripture, New Testament VIII, p. 200.
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equality of husband and wife. That is to say, that neither the husband is
dominant over the wife, nor is the wife dominant over the husband, both are
equal and both are required to submit voluntarily and with love according to
their faith in Christ. John Chrysostom has a wonderful contemplation on this
understanding of equality that expands past the physical relationship: Now if
neither husband nor wife hath power even over their own body, much less
have they over their property. Hear ye, all that have husbands and all that
have wives: that if you must not count your body your own, much less your
money.17
Jesus stated that male and female are united into one flesh, but He qualifies
this union with the important detail that it is God who joins the two. He said in
Mark 10:9, Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.
Thus, for the union between a man and women, to be considered a marriage,
they must be united by God, in other words sanctioned and blessed by God.
Marriage becomes much more than a contract between man and women but
becomes a sacred union, one that is sanctioned by God. Jesus by
mentioning this detail, that it is God who unites the married couple, moves
marriage away from a legal or contractual union, from a social or communal
institution, to a union that by its nature is Holy, sacred and mystical. For this
reason it is common in the Orthodox understanding of marriage to describe it
as a union between three people, husband, wife and God who unites the two.
Clement of Alexandria when speaking of the mystery of Marriage said that it is
17
St. John Chrysostom, Volume XII Homilies on First and Second Corinthians, in
The Nicene and Post-Nicene Fathers: first series, edited by Philip Schaff. (Grand
Rapids, Michigan: WM.B. Eerdmans Publishing company, 1989), p. 105.
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the House of God18 and quoted Matthew 18:20 as blessing marriage and
explaining how God is in the midst of this union; Where two or three are
gathered together for my sake, there I am in the midst of them (Matt 18:20).
Clement asked, Who are the two or three gathered in the name of Christ in
whose midst the Lord is? Does He not by the three mean husband, wife,
and child?19 Thus marriage is much more than a contract between a man
and women, but it is a mystical union blessed by God himself. Clement
eloquently said, Marriage in accordance with the Word of God is holy
because it is a union that is subject to God, contracted with a sincere heart
and full fidelity by those who have been washed and purified by the water of
Baptism and who have the same hope.20 Marriage is more than a contract
between a man and women, but it is a sacred union that is accomplished by
God.
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The understanding that marriage is more than a human contract, but rather a
union that is Holy and blessed by God and therefore should not be broken, is
reinforced by Jesus discussion on divorce. In Mark 10 and Mathew 19 Jesus
was asked by the Pharisees, Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife? (Mark
10:2) The Lord of course was aware of their intention to test if He would
contradict the Law of Moses. Jesus instead asked them, what did Moses
command you? (Mark 10:3) Importantly the Pharisees responded by saying,
Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of dismissal and to divorce her.
By their own admission the Pharisees admit that there was no law or
commandment of divorce, but that it was only something allowed as a
concession. Jesus then proceeded to tell them that Moses only allowed
divorce because of your hardness of heart (Mark 10:5). Clearly Jesus was
making the statement that divorce was never part of the plan for marriage, but
as a result of sin and mans hardness of heart, divorce then became
something of a concession. Hooker sums it up well saying: Jesus does not
dispute the validity of the Deuteronomic rule, but sees it as concessionary: It
was introduced because of mans weakness the hardness of your hearts
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and does not affect the principle set out in Gen. 1.27 and 2.24, quoted in vv.s8 which has been in force since the beginning of creation.22
Jesus after he had explained to them the purpose and nature of marriage
from the beginning of creation ended the discussion with the Pharisees by
saying: What God has joined together, let no one separate (Mark 10:9). By
these words Jesus clarified that God blesses marriage, He is the one that
unites, it is His work and therefore the two should not ever be separated. If
marriage was only a human contract between husband and wife, then
perhaps such a contract can be easily terminated. But because marriage is
the work of God then those who seek to divide a marriage and one-flesh
union attacks not only the marriage and the two united in it, but God who
brought them together as well.23 Ambrose of Milan explained that divorce is
not only going against a divine commandment, you are destroying His
work.24 The use of the term one-flesh also shows that marriage by its nature
cannot be divided, how can you divide one flesh? To do so is unnatural, as
John Chrysostom explained:
To sever flesh is a horrible thing, so also to divorce a wife is unlawful. And
He stayed not at this, but brought in God also by saying, What therefore God
hath joined together, let not man put asunder, showing that the act was both
against nature, and against law; against nature, because one flesh is
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dissevered; against law, because that what God hath joined and commanded
it not be divided, ye conspire to do this.25
Following the discussion with the Pharisees, Jesus had a further conversation
with His disciples, in which He clarified further the nature of marriage. Jesus
told His disciples Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits
adultery against her (Mark 10:11). These words would have seemed strange
to the disciples, as at its core Jesus was saying that even after a husband
divorces his wife, if he marries another he is still committing adultery.
According to Jesus, even if under the law the husband has divorced his wife,
in the eyes of God he is still united to his wife and thus if he marries another
he is committing adultery. From this, one may conclude that although Jesus
allowed divorce he did not condone remarriage. Witherington comes to this
conclusion:
The Creator and the creation order both undergird
marriage. If in fact a couple so joined together does
divorce, they must not remarry anyone else because to do
so would be adultery. Painter is right that the upshot of the
teaching here is that while Jesus recognizes the reality of
divorce, he does not think this legitimizes remarriage if the
original couple were joined together by God in the first
place.26
Thus the nature of marriage is much more than a man made legal contract.
But by its very nature, when blessed and sanctified by God and the two are
united by God, the marriage union cannot be destroyed even with a legal
divorce. Another important aspect on Jesus view of marriage can be
expounded form Mark 10:11. If Jesus viewed the remarriage of either
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husband or wife who were divorced as adultery then the conclusion must be
that polygamy was not allowed and is against the nature of the union of
marriage intended by God. Hooker articulates this understanding concisely:
Jesus ruled against polygamy; if a man is not free to marry another woman
because, in Jesus view, he is still bound to his first wife, this means that God
permits him only one wife.27
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flesh of the honorable marriage. Hence, by his free will, man can destroy
marriage, rejecting its grace of sanctification.28
From the New Testament writings marriage is found to be part of Gods plan
for His creation, where mankind is made male and female as equals but
differentiated by their sex. Marriage by its nature was created by God for the
male and female to be united into one flesh and was designed to be between
one man and one women, a necessary monogamy. Both male and female
are created equal, and have equal status in marriage, but have different roles,
differentiated by their sex. The marital union is one that must be blessed by
God, as it is God who unites the male and female to become one flesh. By
virtue of Gods work to unite the two, marriage cannot be viewed only as a
contract between husband and wife, but as a sacred union. This sacred
union, by its nature can never be dissolved, except in the case of adultery,
which divides the one-flesh, for this reason Jesus said I say to you, whoever
divorces his wife, except for unchastity, and marries another commits
adultery. (Matthew 19:9)
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Bibliography
Grube, George W. More what the church fathers say about: Volume 1&2.
Minneapolis Minnesota: Light and Life Publishing, 2005.
Malaty, Tadros Y. The Gospel according to St. Mark. Alexandria Egypt: St.
George Church, 2003.
18
St. John Chrysostom, Volume X Homilies on St. Matthew, in The Nicene and
Post-Nicene Fathers: first series, edited by Philip Schaff. Grand
Rapids, Michigan: WM.B. Eerdmans Publishing company, 1989.
St. John Chrysostom, Volume XII Homilies on First and Second Corinthians,
in The Nicene and Post-Nicene Fathers: first series, edited by Philip
Schaff. Grand Rapids, Michigan: WM.B. Eerdmans Publishing
company, 1989.