Love and marriage in Pride and Prejudice

With the first sentence of the book, Austen deftly establishes the major theme and tone
of Pride and Prejudice. She states: It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man
in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife. 1 This sentence introduces the
theme of marriage, and also introduces the tone of irony, which Austen will use throughout
the novel. It would appear from the formal opening words that the novel is going to dedicate
itself to lofty ideals. The second half of the sentence, however, reveals that the universal truth
is nothing more than a social truth, which ironically is not a truth at all, but a
misrepresentation of social facts. A single man in possession of a good fortune was not in
want of a wife, unless he chose to be.
In her novel, Austen studies social relationships in the limited society of a country
neighborhood and investigates them in detail with an often ironic and humorous eye. The
gossipy small town of Hertfordshire is a microcosm of society at large. Of all mothers, Mrs.
Bennet and Lady Lucas are especially eager to find husbands for their daughters, spending all
their time looking out for newcomers to the neighborhood. When a single gentleman with a
large fortune by the name of Bingley moves into a mension called Netherfield Park, the news
quickly spreads through the neighbourhood. Mrs. Bennet doesnt want her daughters to get
married simply for the prestige and wealth it may bring them, although that has appeal.
Instead, there is a more urgent force behind Mrs. Bennets fixation on marriagethe entail.
Because Mr. Bennet has no male heirs, upon his death his estate will go to Mr. Collins, his
relative, rather than to any of his daughters.
Through six marriages, Jane Austen defines good and bad reasons for marriage.
CharlotteLucas, LydiaWickham, JaneBingley, and ElizabethDarcy are the four newly
weds. The old marriages are those of Mr. and Mrs. Bennet, and Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner. The
Bennets marriage is shown to be a disaster, with the wife acting like a fool and the husband
retreating to live an uninvolved life in his ivory tower, which would reflect negatively on their
daughters prospects for marriage. Five unprepared girls about to make the choices that will
determine their adult futures should be a fathers businessespecially in the light of his
own unsatisfactory marriage.2 As it often happens in life, Mr. Bennet married for beauty.
Soon he realized that Mrs. Bennet would not make him an ideal wife. The difference between
1

AUSTEN, Jane: Pride and Prejudice, Tark Classic Fiction, Rockville, 2008, p. 3
TODD, Janet: The Cambridge Introduction to Jane Austen, Cambridge University Press,
Cambridge, 2006, p. 60
2

them is amusing, but it is also ironic. In a novel about couples overcoming misunderstandings
of each other to reach marital happiness, the readers first view of marriage is one of a
mismatched couple that cannot communicate.
In opposition to the marriage of the Bennets is the pleasant conjugal life of the
Gardiners, who are mutually compatible and supportive. They obviously enjoy each others
company. Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner are also the only couple to show Elizabeth what happy
marriage is like. Their financial stability, restraint, decorum and mutual respect are evident,
despite the snobbish criticism other characters make of them.
According to Pride and Prejudice, the typical Georgian marriage valued financial
stability more than true love. After accepting the very proposal of marriage that Elizabeth
refused, Charlotte Lucas explains, I am not romantic you know. I never was. I ask only a
comfortable home; and considering Mr. Collins character, connections, and situation in life, I
am convinced that my chance of happiness with him is as fair as most people can boast on
entering the marriage state.3 Charlotte Lucas marriage to Mr. Collins is a compromise, one
of economic necessity, so she will have a means of support. Thus she is able to escape the
worst and most unimaginable status of a lonely spinster and place all her hope in a loveless
marriage. For Charlotte, men are prey to be caught by predatory women, who must make an
effort in the chase.4
Lydias marriage to Wickham provides Austen with another opportunity to explore the
marriage theme that runs through the novel. Lydia and Wickham do not run off together out of
love; they elope out of infatuation, lust, and necessity. When Elizabeth thinks about Lydia and
Wickhams future, she wonders how little of permanent happiness could belong to a couple
who were only brought together because their passions were stronger than their virtue?5
Austens view on Lydias type of marriage, then, seems to be that a relationship based upon
sexual desire will soon lose its luster. Eloping without the intent of marriage was a very
serious matter in Georgian England. Not only is Lydia's reputation tarnished, but it could
severely harm the other Bennets as well.
Jane and Bingleys relationship is based on genuine love, understanding, and a
similarity of feelings and perspectives on the world. Such a relationship stands in obvious
contrast to the marriages of the Bennets, the Collinses, and the Wickhams, which all lack this
type of emotion or compatibility. From the beginning of the novel, both Jane and Elizabeth
have repeatedly stated that they want to marry for love. From the indisputable happiness
3
4
5

AUSTEN, Jane, op.cit., p. 84

TODD, Janet, op.cit., p. 62
ibid., p. 201

caused by Janes engagement, it seems that Jane and Elizabeths view of marriage is the one
approved of by Austen. Such a marriage naturally enhances the lives of the couple, but it also
enriches the lives of their family, friends, and future children.
Elizabeth's plight is what one imagines Jane Austen's to have been: she must find a
man who is at least her equal in intelligence and sensitivity, who can give her an appropriate
social and economic position, and who does not object to making a disadvantageous alliance.
Mr. Collins, Wickham, and Colonel Fitzwilliam are all ruled out for one or another of these
reasons. Elizabeths view of marriage and response to Charlottes concept of marriage are
interesting considering Elizabeths family and future prospects. In seeking a love match,
Elizabeth is searching for a relationship opposite to that of her parents. Her parents neither
love nor like each other, which creates a fragmented household in which neither parent seems
very happy.
Elizabeths prejudice is so strong against Darcy and for Wickham that she will accept
at face value everything that Wickham says. As her manners and attitudes suggest, with no
guidance except what her aunt Gardiner occasionally gives her, Elizabeth has been too little
aware of the realities of the marriage market she is entering. Hence her desire to have the
penniless Wickham as lover because he appeals to her.6
In the famous proposal scene, Darcys feelings for Elizabeth have reached the point of
compelling him to go to her and expose his heart, leading to his outburst, In vain have I
struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how
ardently I admire and love you. 7 However, rather than emphasizing his love for Elizabeth,
Darcy focuses on the negatives of the situation and makes disparaging comments about her
family. Meanwhile, the proposal completely stuns Elizabeth. She has been blind to Darcys
affections for her because she has been so prejudiced against him. However, after she realized
the truth about her prejudices, she opened herself up to discovering Darcys true character.
The relationship between Darcy and Elizabeth is a perfect match between two animated and
intelligent adults who truly love, support, and respect one another. It is Jane Austens picture
of the ideal marriage.
In the beginning of the book, Austen presents the reader with the image of the
Bennets unhappy marriage and the sense of a perilous future for the Bennet daughters if they
remain unwed. As a result, the driving force behind the plot is for the Bennet girlsJane and
Elizabeth in particularto find husbands they can love and respect. Although many obstacles
6
7

TODD, Janet, op.cit., pp. 71-72

AUSTEN, Jane, op.cit., p. 123

stand in their way, two young couples finally manage to find the way to their happiness.
Austen concludes her novel with an implied message that marital happiness originates not
from a love of security (Charlotte), passion (Lydia), or perfect harmony (Jane), but rather
from an honest recognition and love of the whole person, strengths and weaknesses. Before
people can find that kind of complete understanding of another, however, they must first fully
know themselves.