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FACULTY OF EDUCATION AND SOCIAL SCIENCE

SEMESTER MAY / 2014


OUMH1303
ENGLISH FOR ORAL COMMUNICATION



QUESTION A: WRITTEN ASSIGNMENT

Speech text: What does it take to be a good parent?






NAME : AZIZAH SAPIEE
MATRICULATION NO : 681011135274001
IDENTITY CARD NO. : 681011135274
TELEPHONE NO. : 0198244476
E-MAIL : azizahsapiee@yahoo.com
LEARNING CENTRE : OUM, MIRI





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A very good morning to everyone present. I would like to thank you for coming
Brainy Montessori Open Day. My name is Mrs. Azizah and I am going to give speech about
topic What does it take to be a good parent? I would like thank you for give this
opportunity and share some important about characteristics of good parents. I starts my
speech with a quote:-
Parents arent the people you come from. Theyre the people you want to be, when
you grow up.
J odie Picoult
A real parent is the one who helps his children to eradicate their personality defects
and imbibe good qualities. However, today's parents feel that buying costly clothes and
estables and paying high fees for coaching classes are their only duties. They fail to
understand that these things make the children desirous of only worldly pleasures. These
pleasures nurture defects in them. So, parents have to introspect whether they are giving true
education to their children. It is the duty of parents to help their children to imbibe good
qualities and thus, lead a happy life.
Ladies and gentlemen,
Major characteristic that good parent demonstrates is being a positive role model.
Role models are often subjects of admiration and emulation. Through their personal qualities
and achievements, they can inspire others to strive and develop without direct instruction.
Due to their regular presence and interaction with their children, parents can serve as
consistent and evolving role models for their children. A positive role model demonstrates
and presents a healthy lifestyle that involves exercise, nature, art and self-expression. A
positive role model prepares food that nourishes the eyes, the mouth and the body. They are
wise in their words and actions. They strive to express their wants in a positive manner. They
have hindsight, now-sight and foresight. They are not afraid to say they made a mistake and
they are open to feedback on how they can do things better. They don't blame others, nor do
they portray themselves as a victim. They teach the concept of acceptance by using
everything for their upliftment, advancement and growth. They demonstrate the concept of
patience by being present enjoying what is going on in the moment no matter what. They
consciously present the concept of cause and effect so the child can learn through its
experiences what is effective, and what is not effective. Since they know they are more than
just a mother or a father, they take time to nurture and care for themselves so they can give
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from their overflow. For example, they should not smoke cigarettes, drink and use bad words
around children otherwise children can take parents their model and can have bad habits.

Ladies and gentlemen,
I think "loving" is the most important characteristic that good parent needs to
demonstrate. When parent love, those are consciously sharing our thoughts and feelings;
those are tenderly touching and holding our child with care. Parents are playful and joyful in
their actions and in their guidance. They take time to listen and to explain things to our child
so they are able to understand. They always answer the child's questions. Parents create
quality time where we can look into the child's eyes and connect with their "soul." We create
an environment that is safe from any emotional, mental or physical harm. This world,
circulated with the word love. All of the human or animal depend on love. Love is very
important for made good quality of family. For example, when children didnt get love from
their parents it will made their children involve in social problem. Those are try to get from
outside and even not realize which one good or bad.
Love can change a person the way a parent can change a baby- awkwardly, and
often with a great deal of mess.
Lemony Snicket, Horseradish
Besides that, sometimes the best thing you can give your child is love and affection. A
warm touch or a caring hug can let your child know how much you really care about him or
her. Don't ever overlook how important a physical connection is when it comes to your child.
Here are some ways to show love and affection:
A gentle cuddle, a little encouragement, appreciation, approval or even a smile can go
a long way to boost the confidence and well-being of your children.
Tell them you love them every day, no matter how angry at them you may be.
Give lots of hugs and some kisses. Make your children comfortable with love and
affection from birth.
Love them unconditionally; don't force them to be who you think they should be in
order to earn your love. Let them know that you will always love them no matter
what.

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Ladies dan gentlemen,
After that, parenting styles is a one of characterises that shows a good parent. Based on these
dimensions, Baumrind suggested that the majority of parents display one of three different
parenting styles. Further research by Maccoby and Martin also suggested the addition of a
fourth parenting style (1983).
Authoritarian Parenting
In this style of parenting, children are expected to follow the strict rules established by the
parents. Failure to follow such rules usually results in punishment. Authoritarian parents fail
to explain the reasoning behind these rules. If asked to explain, the parent might simply reply,
"Because I said so." These parents have high demands, but are not responsive to their
children.
Authoritive Parenting
Like authoritarian parents, those with an authoritative parenting style establish rules and
guidelines that their children are expected to follow. However, this parenting style is much
more democratic. Authoritative parents are responsive to their children and willing to listen to
questions. When children fail to meet the expectations, these parents are more nurturing and
forgiving rather than punishing.
Permissive Parenting
Permissive parents have very few demands to make of their children. These parents rarely
discipline their children because they have relatively low expectations of maturity and self-
control. Permissive parents are more responsive than they are demanding. They are non-
traditional and lenient, do not require mature behaviour, allow considerable self-regulation,
and avoid confrontation. Permissive parents are generally nurturing and communicative with
their children, often taking on the status of a friend more than that of a parent.
Uninvolved Parenting
An uninvolved parenting style is characterized by few demands, low responsiveness and little
communication. While these parents fulfil the child's basic needs, they are generally detached
from their child's life. In extreme cases, these parents may even reject or neglect the needs of
their children.
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My children have experienced Uninvolved Parenting when they were living with their
father after our divorce. He always stayed in his room to drink and be drunken when he
would come out of the room it would be to scold or get onto the kids for being loud or
making messes. Neither him nor his live in girlfriend would cook or clean up after the kids.
Now that the kids are back with me and have been for some time now it has been extremely
hard getting them into a parenting style that has structure and rewards or consequences for
their actions. I feel that my parenting style is Authorities Parenting, I am forgiving of my
childrens actions. They know that when they are punished why and I explain to them what I
expect and do not expect. I am very nurturing of them but them to have responsibility as well
I am very positive and encouraging to them. Every step that I make my

Ladies and gentlemen,
Guiding young children's behaviour is challenging work, but it is the most important job of
the family. Children need your help in learning how to behave. Discipline and supervision
change with the age of your child. Young children demand more time in guiding their
behaviour. Older children still need your guidance, but the amount of time and the number of
times is less. Always keep in mind that discipline, which really means teaching, is "training
that develops self-control." Discipline is not mean. It is not embarrassing. It does not destroy
a child's sense of worth. Eventually you want your child to develop the internal ability to
guide his or her behaviour and actions in proper ways in all situations, even when you are not
there. This can be done if you do it a little bit all through childhood. Begin when your child is
very young. Remember that the world is different from when you were young. Your child
may need different skills.
After that, once you get used to the idea that you are a parent, it is important to get
comfortable with the idea that you are responsible for guiding your child's behaviour. In the
process, you are going to be ignored, neglected and unpopular at times. In order to help your
child develop self-control, you must have confidence that you are doing the right thing for
your child. Keep your goal in your mind. You need to discipline and guide your child's
behaviour respectfully, firmly and matter-of-factly even when you are feeling anxious or
angry. You need to remain in control. All through the stages of development, children need to
know in advance what is expected and which behaviours are unacceptable. Young children
are not able to always understand the words you say, even if you tell them what to expect.
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When children are young, you need to watch what they are able to tolerate. Leave when their
behaviour and attention span are not up to the activity. For example, when you take a very
young child shopping, watch carefully for what the child can tolerate. Shopping is fun for a
certain amount of time. Then the child might need to go on to another activity.
Another characteristic to be a good parent is respect. Respect defines as a feeling of
deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or
achievements. Respect also means due regard for the feelings, wishes, or rights of others. A
good parent is respectful to their child, even when disciplining. Children first learn respectful
behaviours from their parents or guardians, so a child who is consistently treated respectfully
by parent is more likely to develop a good self-respect, and a respect for others, including
their parent. Parents should keep in mind that it is possible to be respectful and resilient at the
same time. Respect your children privacy as you would want them to respect yours, for
example, if you teach your child that your room is out of boundaries to them, respect the
same with their room. Respect your childrens decision as well is important. Let you children
to choose anything they like, they want or desire. If you go shopping cloth with them for
instance, let them to choose and give relevant opinion if necessary. By this, your children can
see you respect what they really want or choose. I believe some parents, if they have
teenagers studying in college; they like to choose the course on behalf of their children. You
should avoid this behaviour and be respectful to what your teenager chooses for studying. If
you think their choice is wrong or not suitable for them, talk and discuss with them. By
discussing, they will tell you why they choose the course instead of what you expect them to
take. When your satisfy, please respect their choose and this will make your child feels good
and respected.
Ladies and gentlemen,
Finally, good parents create a social environment where the concept of "family" extends out
into the community and expands to all our brothers and sisters on the planet. Friends are
welcomed and play is an opportunity to learn, to grow, to communicate, and to share. Formal
education is embraced and the development of the intellect is valued and praised. Discipline
and consistent daily routines, that support the family and the community, are demonstrated
and reinforced. The child knows that they can count on their parent to hold, to comfort, to
listen, to understand, and to love them.
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To conclude my speech today, I want to highlight again six characteristics to be a good
parent, which are be a positive role model, loving, parenting styles, discipline, respect and
create a social environment. Good parent must have good moral values in themselves because
children will tend to mimic their traits. Good parent strives toward their ideal, however, they
knows it's not reasonable or realistic to expect or demand that they always are ideal. Good
parent extends forgiveness to him/herself when they miss the mark. An ideal parent knows
parenting is an on-going learning process.
Finally, let me say that I am heartened to see so many fellow parents here today, as it
shows our interest and intent to be good parents, to do what is really helpful for our children.
Your children is precious gift from god to you, you should teach them and raise them well as
nothing in this world is equally same precious to your children. I hope all of you understand
and try so hard to become a good parent.
Thank you,















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References
1. Parenting styles:
http://psychology.about.com/od/developmentalpsychology/a/parenting-style.htm
2. Good Parents:
http://www.sarahchanaradcliffe.com/parenting/good-parent/