10 steps

to solid self esteem

by Mark Tyrrell
Full self hypnosis
program with practical
exercises and 10 audio
downloads
10 steps to solid self esteem
Where do you start?
Step 1 - Building self esteem
Step 2 - Feel attractive
Step 3 - Stop self blame
Step 4 - Overcoming an inferiority complex
Step 5 - Stop comparing yourself to others
Step 6 - Stop seeking approval
Step 7 - Overcome insecurity
Step 8 - Self acceptance
Step 9 - Find your identity
Step 10 - Put yourself frst
Bonus Step 1 - Overcome victim mentality
Bonus Step 2 - Youre worth it
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and ls a well-esLabllshed hypnoLherapy cenLre speclallslng ln psychology Lralnlng and
provlslon of hypnosls resources onllne and oMlne.
!" $%&'$ %( $()*+ $&), &$%&&-
2012 Pypnosls uownloads.com LLd
All rlghLs reserved worldwlde.
no parL of Lhls publlcauon may be sLored ln a reLrleval sysLem, Lransmlued or
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for sLrlcLly personal use), wlLhouL Lhe prlor agreemenL and wrluen permlsslon of Lhe
auLhor.
?ou musL noL use any hypnosls downloads or any of Lhe course maLerlal for any
commerclal purpose.
uncommon knowledge LLd
Cueens 8ulldlng, 8 Ceorge SLreeL, Cban A34 3S8
unlLed klngdom
Course deslgn by kaLhleen ledoulo
kfedoulo[gmall.com
Cover deslgn by ?o?o ueslgn
www.yoyodeslgn.com
./&0& +( 1(2 $%30%4
!" $% &%' $"() *& +(,'- ./"& ." (0"
cootemplouoq ootselves.

Mark 1waln
When Carla came for her lasL sesslon wlLh me, l asked her Lo look back on how Lhlngs
had been wlLh her before we sLarLed worklng LogeLher, and Lo puL lnLo words how she
felL now.
1hls ls whaL she sald:
As o cbllJ l felt sttooqe ooJ Jl[eteot somebow ftom tbe people otoooJ me.
l boJ tbe seose, oot jost tbot l wosot qooJ eoooqb, bot tbot l oevet !"#$%
be qooJ eoooqb - fot ooytbloq, ot ooyooe. lm oot sote wbete tbls feelloq
come ftom, bot lt weot oo tlqbt loto oJoltbooJ. l jost felt looJepoote. lt
lofecteJ my telouoosblps, lt o[ecteJ my wotk llfe, lt wos llke o Jotk clooJ
ovet evetytbloq.
wbeo l tblok oboot wbot lt wos llke to llve llke tbot, lt wos llke l boJ tbls
bottlble botsb boq volce toulloq oo lo my beoJ, olwoys bellulloq me, olwoys
scotoloq me, wteckloq ooy cbooce l mlqbt bove boJ of feelloq coofJeot, ot
ooy sbteJ of ptlJe l mlqbt toke lo ooytbloq.
lf o telouoosblp wos qoloq well tbls volce woolJ keep tellloq me lt wos
boooJ to eoJ boJly sooo becoose, well, ooce tbey &'($$) qot to koow me,
tbey woolJot woot to speoJ ooe sloqle momeot wltb me... evet oqolo. 5o
! #$%# &'()*+,+ -*.)/*01+23*4 561
wbeo telouoosblps JlJ eoJ, l wosot sotptlseJ, lt wos ooly to be expecteJ,
wosot lt?
wbeo l look bock, l coo see tbot tbls losecotlty, tbls Jeep seose of oot beloq
qooJ eoooqb os me, toloeJ oll kloJs of oppottoolues fot me. l olwoys felt
otbet womeo wete so mocb clevetet, ptemet, mote toleoteJ, so mocb *+!'&
tboo me. l felt tbot l wos somebow wtooq ot boJ tlqbt ot my vety cote.
wotse, lt seemeJ to me tbot otbet people coolJ - ot vety sooo woolJ - be
oble to tell jost wbot o ctoppy bomoo beloq l wos. wblcb meoot l wosot
vety comfottoble otoooJ otbets.
wbeo l JlJ well ot sometbloq - wblcb JlJ boppeo someumes lo splte of oll
tbls! - l woolJ ossome lt most be Jowo to lock. lf people ptolseJ me, l wos
olwoys sote tbot tbey wete beloq cbotltoble, ot pomoq lt oo.
1)) *& ())2 3 +")' #*,"&-.) to eveo /' lo tbls wotlJ. lt wosot o qteot woy to
llve.
8ot oow, oow tbot lve Jooe oll tbls wotk, lve leotoeJ so mocb, ooJ come
to ooJetstooJ so mocb mote oboot wbo l teolly om, ooJ wbot qeooloe
stteoqtbs ooJ qlfs l bove - lts completely Jl[eteot!
l koow bow to oottote ooJ eocootoqe myself ooJ qet my teol oeeJs met.
l koow bow to sttetcb myself ooJ become 0"&' copoble. l koow bow to
boolsb tbose ovetly ctlucol tbooqbts. l koow bow to bollJ qeooloe ttosuoq
telouoosblps ooJ Jeol wltb ptoblems wltboot follloq opott. l koow wbose
oploloo to llsteo to, ooJ wbo to JlsteqotJ.
Now tbete ls llqbt ot tbe eoJ of tbe toooel, o vety btlqbt llqbt. l feel llke lm
stepploq oot loto o btlqbt soollt opeo looJscope. l feel llke l coo ot lost voloe
myself, ooJ l Joot meoo jost occept myself, bot octoolly be 1$'(2'% to be
4"5
lm qoloq to speoJ tbe test of my ume oo tbls plooet $+3+*4, oot jost exlsuoq!
l coot belleve bow fot lve come, lo socb o sbott ume!
ou're |n a beuer pos|non than you know
lf you're readlng Lhls, you are probably one of Lhe many Lhousands of people who have
low self esLeem - and wlsh Lhey dldn'L.
So here's some good news. ?ou're beuer o, rlghL aL Lhls mlnuLe, Lhan Lhe Lhousands of
people who have Lhe opposlLe problem.
Surprlsed?
! #$%# &'()*+,+ -*.)/*01+23*4 561
?ou're beuer o because people wlLh Lhe opposlLe problem - people who have '%%
mocb self esLeem - are usually qulLe bllnd Lo Lhe slgnlcanL problems Lhls causes, for
Lhemselves and oLhers, and Lherefore have no lncenuve Lo do anyLhlng abouL lL.
?ou, on Lhe oLher hand, are only Loo aware LhaL your low oplnlon of yourself ls havlng a
negauve eecL on your llfe, holdlng you back and llmlung you ln many ways, and you're
readlng Lhls because you are noL happy abouL Lhls and you wanL Lo - and are ready Lo -
Jo sometbloq abouL lL.
?ou may noL be enurely sure /%. Lo go abouL changlng Lhlngs, or /%. +(0 you can geL
wlLh changlng Lhlngs, buL here you are, Laklng Lhe rsL sLep. ?ou are on your way Lo self
esLeem LhaL ls nelLher )%. nor blqb buL beoltby.
As Lhe old saylng has lL: 1he longesL [ourney beglns wlLh buL a slngle sLep."
So leL's Lake a look aL 'self esLeem' and whaL lL means.
./&0& +(&$ 1(20 $&5$& (, 1(20$&), 6(-& ,0(-4
nobody grows up ln a vacuum, lsolaLed on an lsland. We arrlve lnLo a famlly/
communlLy and Lhe rsL sense we geL of ourselves, of who we are and whaL we are
llke, comes from how LhaL famlly/communlLy sees us and LreaLs us.
lrom a chlld's polnL of vlew, whaL ls around Lhem ls 'Lhe world'. 1hls ls reallLy, Lhls ls
how lL ls. Chlldren don'L quesuon how Lhey are LreaLed, even lf Lhey suer Lerrlbly.
Chlldren have noLhlng Lo measure Lhelr own experlence agalnsL, wheLher lL ls good or
bad.
lL ls only laLer, as we gradually maLure, as we encounLer oLhers who behave qulLe
dlerenLly from Lhe people we rsL knew, LhaL we geL some awareness of a 'blgger
plcLure', an awareness LhaL our personal experlence ls noL all Lhere ls, or all Lhere can
be, or necessarlly 'rlghL'.
Speaklng of Lhlngs belng 'rlghL' remlnds me of how Lo bake a sh.
kosolles motbet llkeJ teocbloq bet llule Jooqbtet oll oboot cookloq ooJ
ptepotloq meols. 5be JeclJeJ tbe ume boJ come to sbow bet bow to boke o
fsb.
5be took o lotqe fsb oot of tbe teftlqetotot, lolJ lt oo o cbopploq bootJ, cot o[
lts beoJ ooJ lts toll, lolJ lt lo bet bokloq poo ooJ coveteJ lt wltb ftesbly cboppeJ
betbs wblle kosolle wotcbeJ.
wby JlJ yoo cot tbe beoJ ooJ toll o[? oskeJ kosolle cotloosly.
net motbet tbooqbt fot o wblle ooJ tbeo solJ, lve olwoys Jooe lt tbot woy -
tbots bow CtooJmo JlJ lt.
! #$%# &'()*+,+ -*.)/*01+23*4 561
wby JlJ CtooJmo Jo tbot?
l Joot koow, solJ bet motbet. lets qo osk bet.
5o tbey weot toooJ to CtooJmos boose to foJ oot wby sbe cot tbe beoJ ooJ
toll o[ tbe fsb befote bokloq lt.
CtooJmo tbooqbt fot o wblle ooJ tbeo solJ, lve olwoys Jooe lt tbot woy.
1bots bow my motbet JlJ lt.
wby JlJ Cteot CtooJmo Jo tbot? oskeJ kosolle.
l Joot koow, solJ CtooJmo. ooll bove to osk bet.
5o kosolle ooJ bet motbet weot to vlslt Cteot CtooJmo to see lf tbey coolJ foJ
oot wby yoo oeeJeJ to cot tbe beoJ ooJ toll o[ o fsb befote yoo boke lt.
Cteot CtooJmo wos vety pleoseJ to see tbem, ooJ looqbeJ beotuly wbeo sbe
beotJ tbe poesuoo.
lts vety slmple, sbe solJ. l boJ to cot o[ tbe beoJ ooJ tbe toll becoose my
bokloq poo wos too smoll to ft o wbole fsb lo!
noneLheless, our early experlences are among Lhe mosL powerful forces shaplng us,
preclsely because Lhey happened when we were aL our mosL lmpresslonable.
ConLrary Lo popular bellef, you don'L have Lo be ralsed by cruel parenLs Lo have
negauve experlences. Cur parenLs mlghL love us very much, Lhey mlghL have Lhe besL
of lnLenuons, buL noL have good soclal skllls Lhemselves, for lnsLance. So Lhey would
be llkely Lo avold soclal slLuauons, or handle Lhem awkwardly, and Lhls would be Lhe
example LhaL we would geL, leavlng us poorly equlpped Lo deal wlLh such slLuauons
ourselves.
Cr Lhey mlghL noL undersLand Lhe emouonal needs of chlldren very well, and crluclze
our chlldlsh eorLs Loo harshly lnsLead of encouraglng Lhem, ln Lhe bellef LhaL Lhls ls
how Lo do lL".
lf you had a loL of such negauve experlences and/or negauve feedback from people
around you when you were young, and you accepLed, as you llkely dld, Lhe negauve
messages Lhose experlences gave you abouL yourself, lL can be surprlslngly dlmculL Lo
shed Lhls negauve vlew of yourself laLer.
Lven lf, rauonally and consclously, you know LhaL Lhose assessmenLs of you were
blased and unfalr and wrong, lL somehow conunues Lo +"") 'rlghL and Lrue'.
1he opposlLe can happen Loo. Chlldren and young people who are glven an
ooteollsucolly posluve message abouL how wonderful Lhey are and how much Lhey
are enuLled Lo Lhe deference and admlrauon of oLhers wlll come away wlLh an
exaggeraLedly hlgh sense of Lhelr own worLh.
! #$%# &'()*+,+ -*.)/*01+23*4 561
1hls ls no less damaglng, ln lLs own way, Lhan havlng an exaggeraLedly low sense of
your own worLh.
So whaL acLually goes wrong?
now b|as can screw you up
l Lhlnk we can all agree LhaL, ln order Lo have a chance of maklng even half-decenL
cholces ln llfe, lL ls lmporLanL Lo have rellable and facLual lnformauon.
lL lsn'L always posslble Lo have ()) Lhe lnformauon we need Lo make a declslon,
of course. ln facL, we raLher oen have Lo make declslons based on lnsumclenL
lnformauon.
Powever, lf, on Lop of noL havlng ()) Lhe lnformauon we ldeally need, Lhe lnformauon
LhaL we do have ls wtooq, elLher by mlsLake or Lhrough wlllful dlsLoruon, lL's easy Lo
see LhaL Lhe cholces we Lhen make based on LhaL lnformauon are more llkely Lo lead ln
Lhe wrong dlrecuon.
So far, so easy Lo undersLand. We need Lhe facLs.
8uL Lhlnk abouL Lhls. 1he one consLanL facLor ln every declslon you wlll ever make ln
your enure llfe abouL anyLhlng aL all ls ?Cu.
lf Lhe 'lnformauon' you have abouL yootself ls wrong - LhaL ls, lL ls mlsLaken or
dlsLorLed (dellberaLely or noL) - ()) your declslon-maklng wlll be aecLed. And noL ln a
good way.
?ou wlll base your declslons on Lhe bellef you have LhaL you are 'a cerLaln klnd of
person' when ln facL you mlghL be a qulLe dlerenL klnd of person.
Wouldn'L you llke Lo know who you really are?
When lL comes Lo yourself, don'L you have a tlqbt Lo know Lhe Lrue, falr, unblased (ln
elLher dlrecuon) facLs?
! #$%# &'()*+,+ -*.)/*01+23*4 561
Gemng ho|d of the facts about you
?ou'd Lhlnk lL would be easy Lo know Lhe facLs abouL yourself, wouldn'L you? Aer all,
you are you! Who knows you beuer Lhan you do?
8uL lL's noL so slmple.
l menuoned above how our rsL sense of ourselves comes from Lhe people around us.
1hey Lell us 'whaL we are llke' - and we belleve lL. 1hls ls a unlversal human experlence.
8uL Lhose people who are Lelllng us 'whaL we are llke' have been Lhrough Lhe -(4"
60%,"-- Lhemselves. 1hey moy have a Lrue and falr assessmenL of Lhemselves - and
of us - buL lL ls equally posslble LhaL Lhelr assessmenL of Lhemselves - and of us - ls
dlsLorLed or mlsLaken.
As hlsLory all Loo plalnly shows, compleLely wrong lnformauon can geL handed down as
'facL' for many generauons.
noL only LhaL, buL because we, as lnfanLs and young people, are so very
lmpresslonable, Lhe 'dlsLorLed facLs' abouL ourselves Lend Lo geL very deeply absorbed
lnLo our ldeas abouL ourselves. We absoluLely and compleLely belleve ln Lhelr LruLh,
and noL [usL wlLh our heads. lL +"")- Lrue, rlghL down Lo our very bones.
And Lhe consequence of Lhls ls LhaL we Lhlnk, speak and acL ln ways LhaL 4(*&'(*& Lhe
vlew we have of ourselves.
So even when you are presenLed wlLh convlnclng ob[ecuve evldence Lo Lhe conLrary,
evldence LhaL you are anyLhlng buL a no-good no-hoper, your bones [usL won'L play
along. ?ou sull keep dolng and Lhlnklng Lhe Lhlngs LhaL keep you Lrapped.
1hls puLs you ln a real plckle.
A cerLaln young lloness was once ln Lhls very plckle.
Ooce tbete wos o llooess cob wbo become lost lo tbe Jesett. 5o looq JlJ
sbe wooJet tbtooqb tbe Jesolote Jtyoess tbot sbe eveo fotqot sbe ,(2 (
lloo cob. 1totb to tell, sbe JlJot koow wbot sbe ttoly wos, oltbooqb sbe sull
boJ some voqoe lJeo tbot tbete mlqbt be some ptooJ mojesuc bot petbops
mytblcol cteototes oot tbete koowo os lloos. 8ot sooo sbe boJ otbet
wottles.
wooJetloq ooJet tbe ooteleouoq metclless beot, oot llooess cob become
locteosloqly, tbeo Jespetotely, tbltsty. 8ot o smoll belploq of lock mloqleJ
wltb o sptlokle of fote btooqbt bet to o lotqe cove lo tbe tocks wbete sbe
coolJ ot lost sboJe betself ftom tbe soos bllstetloq toys.
As lt boppeoeJ, Jeep wltblo tbls cove loy o cool pool of llfe sovloq, tbltst
poeocbloq, llp-smockloqly Jellcloos wotet. Oot yoooq llooess coolJot
! #$%# &'()*+,+ -*.)/*01+23*4 561
belleve bet lock, ooJ wos oboot to Jlve beoJlooq loto tbe spotklloq pool
wbeo sbe oouceJ sometbloq scoty.
5totloq bock op ot bet ftom tbe wotet wos tbe most moqolfceot, JlqolfeJ,
sttooq, clevet-lookloq, owesome... coolJ lt be? es, lt wos! 5be boJ come
foce to foce wltb o mytblcol llooess! 5o tbey ,'&' teol! Not jost sometbloq
sbe boJ JteomeJ op!
Of cootse, sbe boJ oo lJeo tbot lt wos ootbloq less tboo bet owo tefecuoo
tbot boJ btooqbt bet op sbott. Awesttock ooJ feotfol, sbe bockeJ o[
bosuly.
now coo l, lowly cteotote tbot l om, qet post tbot ptooJ beooufol cteotote,
tbe qteot qootJloo sotely of tbe vety wotets of llfe?
5be poJJeJ otoooJ tbe cove oot koowloq wbot to Jo, bet tbtoot becomloq
Jtlet ooJ bet wbole boJy JebyJtouoq fottbet by tbe secooJ. AoJ eocb ume
sbe peeteJ loto tbe pool, tbete sbe wos oqolo! 1bot moqolfceot cteotote
stotloq op ot bet!
lloolly, bet ttoly Jespetote oeeJ qove bet cootoqe. No mouet wbot tbe
oppoteot tlsk, sbe .(% to Jtlok.
5o sbe took o Jeep bteotb plooqeJ loto tbe pool.
AoJ of cootse, tbete wos oo otbet llooess woluoq fot bet. Ot totbet, tbe
llooess of tbe pool wos sbe betself. 5be Jtook bet fll ooJ wos soveJ.
AoJ tbot ls bow tbe yoooq llooess come to koow bet ttoe ootote.
Pow do you brlng whaL you 'feel ln your bones' and whaL you 'know ln your head'
(because, unllke LhaL young lloness, you undersLand abouL reecuons) LogeLher, so
LhaL you can boLh koow and +"") Lhe LruLh, and escape from Lhe llmlLauons lmposed by
blased and dlsLorLed lnformauon?
Well, LhaL's why we've puL LogeLher Lhe !" $%&'$ %( $()*+ $&), &$%&&- course.
What th|s course w||| do for you
We've helped hundreds of people over Lhe years Lo re-assess Lhemselves and come Lo
a falrer and more accuraLe undersLandlng of who Lhey are and who Lhey can be. We
undersLand LhaL Lhls Lransformauon requlres more Lhan head knowledge. lL requlres an
'emouonal updaLe' LhaL changes how you +"").
Lach sLep on Lhls course Lackles a dlerenL aspecL of ldenuLy and self lmage *& $"'(*),
wlLh loLs of LhoughL provoklng lnformauon and Lrled and LesLed exerclses Lo help you
! #$%# &'()*+,+ -*.)/*01+23*4 561
- undersLand whaL shapes your vlew of yourself
- dlscover how Lo break ouL of Lhe lmprlsonlng blas of low self esLeem
- reallze your Lrue poLenual.
8uL Lhls course ls noL [usL a mlne of lnLeresung Lheoreucal lnformauon. lL's abouL
helplng you make really fundamenLal changes wlLhln yourself.
So each sLep lncludes a carefully selecLed audlo hypnosls sesslon deslgned Lo help you
more easlly absorb and lnLegraLe powerful new behavlor pauerns and helpful menLal
amLudes.
1hls ls how Lhe 'emouonal updaLe' you need happens.
1hls ls how lL wlll come Lo feel completely oototol Lo you, ln your very bones, Lo
auLomaucally feel, Lhlnk and acL as a person who knows and values Lhelr own Lrue
worLh.
And far from havlng Lo sLrlve obsesslvely Lo remember every llule Lhlng we'll Lalk abouL
on Lhls course, you can telox and obsotb tbe motetlol ovet ume, maklng lL as naLurally
and deeply yours as your moLher Longue LhaL you learned Lo speak so uenLly wlLhouL
even reallzlng LhaL Lhls was whaL you were dolng.
7&3+1 %( 6(--*%4
Maklng ma[or changes and ad[usLmenLs Lo your world vlew and self lmage requlres a
serlous lnvesLmenL of your ume and energy. 1o geL Lhe maxlmum beneL, you need Lo
make a sLrong commlLmenL Lo yourself:
- Lo read your maLerlal - over and over
- Lo llsLen Lo your downloads regularly
- Lo do Lhe exerclses
- Lo pracuce everyLhlng you learn
- Lo be pauenL wlLh yourself and glve yourself ume
- Lo nouce, monlLor and celebraLe your progress
and mosL lmporLanL of all
- nLvL8 LvL8 1C ClvL u!
! #$%# &'()*+,+ -*.)/*01+23*4 561
And Lhlnklng of LhaL young lloness ln Lhe sLory, and how her need drove her Lo Lake
acuon, l'd llke Lo Lhank you rlghL now for Laklng Lhe plunge by commlmng Lo follow and
Lake whaL you need from Lhls course...
[l've Lold a sllghLly dlerenL verslon of LhaL sLory ln Lhls Condence and Self LsLeem
vldeo, whlch you may en[oy as well!]
now to see how you're do|ng - the rogress Checker
We've puL Lhe maLerlal ln Lhls course LogeLher very carefully Lo make lL as easy as
posslble for you Lo use, and Lo revlew as oen as you need. Lach sLep provldes you
wlLh vlLal lnformauon, ups, exerclses and lnformauon abouL relaLed maLerlal.
1he relaLed maLerlal lncludes
- llnks Lo oLher assoclaLed downloads you mlghL llke Lo purchase
(Lhese are suggesuons only - Lhey are &%' requlred for Lhe course)
- llnks Lo +0"" lnformauve arucles Lo enhance your progress and undersLandlng.
Lach sLep lncludes a rogress Checker sheeL conLalnlng Lwo ldenucal charLs. We
recommend LhaL you prlnL ouL several coples of Lhe rogress Checker for each sLep you
underLake and keep Lhem sorLed ln a folder. (lor your convenlence, we have also puL
all Lhe rogress Checker sheeLs LogeLher aL Lhe end of Lhls documenL, Lo make Lhem
easy Lo nd and prlnL ouL.)
1he rogress Checker makes a number of sLaLemenLs on Lhe Loplc covered ln LhaL sLep,
and asks you Lo lndlcaLe how Lrue Lhese sLaLemenLs are when applled Lo you. nobody
ls golng Lo see Lhls lnformauon buL you. 8e honesL and +(*0 wlLh yourself.
We recommend LhaL you ll ln Lhe rsL charL on Lhe day you sLarL LhaL sLep, befote you
read Lhe maLerlal or llsLen Lo Lhe download. 1hls wlll glve you a base llne agalnsL whlch
Lo monlLor your progress.
lL's only naLural LhaL, when you sLarL, mosL answers wlll Lend Lo fall Lo Lhe le hand slde
of Lhe charL.
AL Lhe end of Lhe 7-day asslgnmenL perlod, compleLe Lhe second charL.
Lach week aer LhaL, conunue lllng ln a rogress Checker for LhaL sLep, even when
you have moved on Lo a subsequenL sLep.
And so on.
! #$%# &'()*+,+ -*.)/*01+23*4 561
Why |t's |mportant to mon|tor progress
keeplng Labs on yourself llke Lhls makes you 4%0" (.(0" of even small lmprovemenLs
and helps you Lo sLay commlued.
Lven %&" move Lo Lhe rlghL on Lhe charL ls progress, and you should be ready Lo
appreclaLe and congraLulaLe yourself on Lhe smallesL posluve change LhaL you nouce.
Always remember LhaL you have a long Lerm goal here, and lL's llule sLeps LhaL wlll geL
you Lhere. lrom ume Lo ume you may see a blg [ump, buL gradual, sLeady, susLalnable
progress ls whaL you are really aer.
When do you sLop lllng ln your rogress Checkers? ?ou'll know.
lL's ume Lo sLarL.
Cood luck.
Mark
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8u||d|ng se|f esteem
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Step 1 8u||d|ng se|f esteem
Pello, and welcome Lo Lhe rsL sLep of your !" $%&'$ %( $()*+ $&), &$%&&- from
Pypnosls uownloads.com!
l'm Mark 1yrrell, and we'll be worklng LogeLher over Lhe comlng weeks Lo help you feel
beuer abouL yourself so LhaL llfe can sLarL Lo feel more meanlngful and sausfylng and
yoo can feel happler generally.
AC1ICN CIN1! 8emember Lo ll ln your rogress Checker before you sLarL!
1oo mooy people ovetvoloe wbot tbey ote
oot ooJ ooJetvoloe wbot tbey ote.
Malcolm SLevenson lorbes
Low self esLeem sLops you feellng as good as oLher people. lL prevenLs you en[oylng
yourself or 'pumng your besL fooL forward' and really golng for success and fulllmenL
ln your llfe.
When your self esLeem rlses Lo a healLhy level lL'll be because you galn a greaLer
capaclLy Lo recognlze whaL's good abouL yourself, you'll sLarL Lo be falrer on yourself.
8uL ralslng self esLeem lsn'L [usL abouL tblokloq dlerenLly.
lL's also Lo do wlLh feelloq dlerenLly. Low self esLeem - an unfalr, blased and
lnLoleranL amLude Lo yourself - ls more Lo do wlLh feellng Lhan Lhlnklng. Cr should
l say, lL ls more Jtlveo by Lhe way we feel, whlch ln Lurn dlrecLs how we Lhlnk abouL
ourselves.
! #$%# &'()*+,+ -*.)/*01+23*4 561
1hls ls one reason why we use hypnosls Lo help people 'geL on Lhelr own slde'.
Many of Lhe sLeps on Lhls course wlll help you Lhlnk dlerenLly and ln much more
healLhy ways. 1he hypnosls downloads you have as parL of Lhe course wlll also help you
+"") dlerenLly, so LhaL, ln Lurn, Lhlnklng dlerenLly feels naLural and easy.
8uL as wlLh anyLhlng, one sLep aL a ume!
1h|nk about th|s: Low self esLeem ls always a 4*-percepuon. lf you really are as useless
or Lerrlble as you Lhlnk you are, lf Lhls really *- Lhe LruLh, Lhen you don'L have 'low self
esLeem'. ?ou are [usL belng very accuraLe abouL yourself.
Cver Lhese sLeps l wanL you Lo become ln some ways )"-- sure of yourself, so LhaL, ln
oLher ways, you can become 4%0" sure of yourself.
now whaL on earLh ls LhaL all abouL?
1he |mportance of becom|ng |ess sure of yourse|f
eople wlLh low self esLeem Lend Lo be Loo sure of Lhemselves.
!"# %&'( &%)&&* *+,&% -% )"" %-.& "(
"-.%&'/&% 0 1-) 23 + 3&4+)2/& #+5
! #$%# &'()*+,+ -*.)/*01+23*4 561
1hls mlghL sound odd, buL low self esLeem pushes you Lo be
7 vety oosote abouL many Lhlngs (such as wheLher people who say Lhey llke you
really llke you)
whlle aL Lhe same ume pushlng you Lo be
7 mocb too sote abouL your self percepuon (Loo sure you are 'faulLy goods', Loo
sure oLhers can'L llke or love you, Loo sure you are dumb or 'worLhless').
1hls 'negauve sureness' needs Lo loosen up as you progress Lhrough Lhese sLeps.
eople wlLh low self esLeem see Lhemselves as belng worse Lhan Lhey really are. lL's as
lf Lhey are wearlng dlsLorung specLacles. 1hey need Lo Lake Lhose damaglng glasses o
and clear Lhelr vlslon, so Lhey can
- sLarL Lo see Lhe dlsuncuons beLween 'good' and 'bad' wlLhln Lhemselves
- be more LoleranL of Lhe 'noL so good', and
- lnwardly encourage and nurLure whaL ls good.
When we Lalk of Lhe need Lo 'nurLure yourself' Lhls ls, ln parL, whaL we mean.
Low se|f esteem: the |nner tyrant
AnoLher way Lo look aL low self esLeem ls llke a llule 'lnner LyranL' LhaL Lrlps you up,
demorallzes you and bullles you.
ulumaLely, we need Lo leL lL know who's boss!
ln a way, lL comes down Lo Lolerance. eople wlLh low self esLeem can be lncredlbly
LoleranL - someumes '%% LoleranL - of oLher people, whlle aL Lhe same ume Lhey are
Lyrannlcally *&LoleranL of Lhelr own acuons and personallues.
1hls ls a cruel klnd of blas and needs Lo be overcome.
now slnce we are progresslng Lhrough a course all abouL developlng healLhy self
esLeem, we need Lo be clear whaL we are Lalklng abouL. We're golng Lo sLarL by looklng
more closely aL Lhe sLarung polnL - Lhe common feaLures of )%. self esLeem.
1ake a look aL Lhe followlng sLory. 8lng any bells wlLh you?
! #$%# &'()*+,+ -*.)/*01+23*4 561
.&5+18$ $%(01
Wendy had low self esLeem. l dldn'L [usL assume Lhls because someone else had
already dlagnosed lL, or even because she Lold me so herself (she dldn'L). lL was
obvlous from Lhe way she spoke abouL herself. l've puL examples of Lhe Lhlngs she sald
on Lhe le of Lhe Lable below, and lndlcaLed whlch common feaLure of low self esLeem
her sLaLemenLs revealed on Lhe rlghL.
./3% .&5+1 $3*+ LSL character|snc
l feel oseless o lot of tbe ume! Maklng sweeplng and damnlng
sLaLemenLs abouL yourself.
leople tell me lm qooJ ot my job, bot l
Joot belleve tbem.
unable Lo accepL even slncere
compllmenLs.
l felt so losecote, lo my lost telouoosblp
l jost coolJot ooJetstooJ wby my
boyftleoJ woolJ woot to be wltb me. lo
foct, lt soooJs tettlble, bot l wos kloJ of
cootemptooos of blm becoose be wos so
olce to socb o oseless petsoo os me.
leellng more comforLable belng
LreaLed badly Lhan decenLly. lnsecure ln
relauonshlps.
l Joot qo oot mocb, ftleoJs someumes
osk me lf l woot to, bot l osoolly moke oo
excose.
Avoldance of soclal slLuauons.
My poteots coll me oo ooJetocblevet
os l bove o Jeqtee bot lve oevet Jooe
ooytbloq wltb lt.
Avoldance of followlng up opporLunlues,
plus preoccupauon wlLh whaL oLhers say.
oo most tblok lm oo owfol petsoo. Cver concern wlLh whaL oLhers Lhlnk and
premaLure assumpuon LhaL oLher people
wlll ootomoucolly [udge you badly.
l boveot beeo lookloq ofet myself so
well teceotly - l boveot boJ o boltcot lo
mootbs - tbe ttotb ls l Joot llke speoJloq
mooey oo myself.
leellng llke you're 'noL worLh lL'.
ltleoJs tty to bolstet me op ooJ tell me
lm outocuve, bot l feel lm oqly - l bote
seeloq myself lo tbe mlttot!
leellng less auracuve Lhan oLher people
seem Lo nd you, plus dlsLrusung
compllmenLs as havlng an ulLerlor mouve
(Lo 'bolsLer me up').
A lot of tbe ume l feel so JeptesseJ ooJ
low ooJ lm olwoys oskloq myself wbots
tbe polot?
Low self esLeem oen colncldes wlLh
anxleLy and sLress relaLed condluons
- lL boLh helps cause (and can ln Lurn
be caused by) depresslon, generallzed
anxleLy dlsorder (CAu) and soclal anxleLy
and shyness.
So you can see Lhere are a few key 'sympLoms' of low self esLeem here:
! #$%# &'()*+,+ -*.)/*01+23*4 561
- fee||ng |ess auracnve Lhan oLhers nd her
- a|| or noth|ng th|nk|ng lndlcaLed by sweeplng exLreme sLaLemenLs
- auLomaucally |mag|n|ng others [udge her neganve|y - mlsuse of Lhe
lmaglnauon ls a key aspecL of low self esLeem
- 0&)26%356& Lo spend money or ume on /&0$&),
- d|mcu|ty fee||ng ||ke an equa| ln relauonshlps
- Lendency Lo be more auracted to peop|e who treat her bad|y Lhan who LreaL
her well (you can feel more 'ln rapporL' wlLh someone who LreaLs you badly lf
you LreaL yourself badly Loo!)
- not fee||ng 'good enough' Lo pursue genulne opporLunlLy
- d|strusnng a|| comp||ments whlle accepnng a|| cr|nc|sm, however exaggeraLed
- feellng |ow |n mood a loL of Lhe ume - lL's cerLalnly no fun feellng rock bouom
self condence and feellng you are fundamenLally 'wrong' as a person.
Wendy also showed llule LrusL ln her own oplnlon, excepL where LhaL oplnlon was self
damnlng, ln whlch case she LrusLed lL 100 (aL rsL).
CLher common sympLoms of low self esLeem lnclude eaung dlsorders and oLher forms
of self harm. (1)
So why dld Wendy feel llke Lhls? Why dld a perfecLly lnLelllgenL, auracuve and ln some
ways gled woman really belleve she was Lhe plLs?
1he cu|t of everyday ||fe
CulLs bralnwash people lnLo Lhlnklng a cerLaln way and so, ln a less obvlous way, does
your 'everyday llfe'.
l'm noL one Lo 'blame' everyLhlng on Lhe parenLs, or obsess over everyLhlng LhaL wenL
wrong ln Lhe dlm and dlsLanL pasL, because Lhe presenL and Lhe fuLure are Lhe key
Lo ndlng fulllmenL. 8uL lL ls useful Lo undersLand where our condluonlng comes
from, especlally lf lL's Lhe klnd of learnlng LhaL holds us back and prevenLs us ndlng
fulllmenL.
So how dld Wendy learn Lo see herself Lhrough such a negauve lens?
8esearch way back ln 2001 found LhaL people wlLh low self esLeem are more llkely Lo
have been sexually, physlcally and/or verbally abused and bullled (over an exLended
perlod) Lhan Lhose wlLh healLhy self esLeem. !"#
! #$%# &'()*+,+ -*.)/*01+23*4 561
Wendy had been consLanLly crluclzed by her faLher whlle her moLher, lL seemed, would
sLand by and [usL leL Lhls happen. Cccaslonally, her faLher and her moLher would beaL
her, even ln her laLe Leens. Per domlneerlng faLher was qulck Lo chlde buL slow Lo
pralse, whlch 'bralnwashed' Wendy over Lhe years Lo see herself Lhrough Lhe eyes of
her faLher and oLher bullles - Lo feel LhaL ln some way Lhey were 'rlghL' abouL her.
Aer all, Lhere musL be someLhlng 'wrong' wlLh her for Lhem Lo LreaL her so badly,
surely?
8elng surrounded ln your formauve years by people who are hlghly crlucal of you, or
who lnlcL Lhelr own perfecuonlsm on you and make you feel LhaL anyLhlng less Lhan
6"0+",' ls a complete follote, ls a classlc reclpe for Lhe developmenL of low self esLeem.
Wendy was bullled aL school and couldn'L recall her parenLs ever saylng anyLhlng
encouraglng or approvlng Lo her. She Lold me she felL llke she had a 'LargeL' mark
Lauooed on her forehead, and LhaL bullles seemed Lo LargeL her llke tbey koow lm o
vlcum ot sometbloq!
Wendy's parenLs also seL unrelenungly hlgh sLandards for Wendy, maklng her feel LhaL
she was always falllng shorL of how she was 'supposed' Lo be.
A word on perfecnon|sm
Low self esLeem may arlse from unreallsuc and overly narrow expecLauons of oneself
fosLered by parenLs or oLhers (we'll be addresslng Lhe Lyranny of perfecuonlsm dlrecLly
laLer on ln SLep 8).
l had a frlend back ln school who goL 96 ln a lrench LesL (easlly Lhe hlghesL score ln
Lhe class!) buL who was really worrled abouL Lelllng hls moLher, because she would
wanL Lo know why he had dropped Lhe 4. narrow, unreallsuc and unfalr expecLauons
place such a burden on people LhaL Lhey can fall Lo en[oy Lhelr successes and lose
perspecuve and humor ln Lhelr llves.
now we bu||y ourse|ves
So low self esLeem can be undersLood as a form of 'self bullylng' whlch ls oen learned
from havlng had Lhe experlence of belng bullled from 'Lhe ouLslde'.
8ullylng (ln all lLs dlerenL forms) ls a messoqe. And Lhe 'message' ls:
7 oo ote ootbloq mote tboo o pbyslcol object to be oboseJ/oseJ
(some people wlLh low self esLeem even descrlbe Lhemselves as ob[ecLs, as ln:
lm Jysfoocuoool, foolty qooJs, JomoqeJ...)
- ?ou are 'bad' and need Lo be punlshed - or lgnored."
! #$%# &'()*+,+ -*.)/*01+23*4 561
When we are regularly bullled we can sLarL Lo 'belleve' Lhe bullylng message.
1hls happens because feellng hlghly emouonal (whlch we Lend Lo do when we are
bullled) narrows and lock our focus of auenuon. lL puLs us ln a klnd of 'negauve Lrance
sLaLe'. 1hls means LhaL durlng Lhese umes we become hlghly soqqesuble and Lherefore
more llkely Lo learn (or raLher 'mls-learn') and absorb whaL Lhe bullylng ls saylng Lo us -
such as LhaL we are noL worLh much.
1h|nk about th|s: 1he Lake home message here ls LhaL low self esLeem ls a Jlstotuoq
lens LhaL leads you Lo make *5366203%& 35+ 9*3$&+ $&), 3$$&$$-&5%$ and belleve Lhem.
lf you feel you have low self esLeem Lhen l wanL you Lo undersLand LhaL you are wrong
39(2% 1(20$&), - aL leasL Lo a much greaLer degree Lhan you mlghL currenLly reallze!
Powever, you may know you are wrong abouL yourself wlLh your 'Lhlnklng braln' buL
noL wlLh your 'emouonal braln'. When you boLh tblok and +"") beuer abouL yourself
Lhen we wlll have arrlved somewhere worLh golng.
Gemng started
1hlngs are probably noL golng Lo change overnlghL, buL whaL lf Lhey dld?
WhaL lf, whlle you are sleeplng LonlghL, your falry godmoLher (she'll be back ln SLep 4)
comes by and waves her maglc wand over you, and your low self esLeem vanlshes ln a
pu of smoke? WhaL Lhen?
?ou probably don'L belleve ln falrles, so you won'L know LhaL she's done Lhls. 8uL when
you open your eyes ln Lhe mornlng.
! #$%# &'()*+,+ -*.)/*01+23*4 561
Lxerc|se - Imag|ne th|s.
[?ou mlghL llke Lo llsLen Lo your download or Lo
some relaxlng muslc Lo help you geL lnLo a relaxed
and creauve sLaLe before you do Lhls exerclse.]
Close your eyes and lmaglne whaL lL would be llke
Lo wake up and nd LhaL your low self esLeem has
mag|ca||y van|shed overnlghL. WhaL happens? Pow
do you feel?
CeL your noLebook or a sheeL of paper and sLarL
wrlung abouL what you nonce and what you do.
?our sLory sLarLs llke Lhls:
wbeo l woke op lo tbe motoloq, tbe vety frst
thinq l nonce tbot lets me koow sometbloq
bos cbooqeJ ls..
l wooJet wbot oo eottb coo bove boppeoeJ!
8/"& 3 become owore thot..
wbeo l qet op ooJ qo to tbe botbtoom ooJ
look lo tbe mlttot, l 2''.. ooJ l 5''$..
Conunue descrlblng how LhaL day goes, paylng
auenuon Lo a|| the th|ngs that are d|erent
because you no longer suer from low self esLeem
aL all. Pave fun lmaglnlng lL!
WhaL ls Lhe most s|gn|hcant change LhaL you
nouce?
WhaL ls Lhe polnL of Lhls exerclse? lL helps you Lo sLarL movlng your focus of auenuon
owoy from everyLhlng LhaL you Lhlnk ls wrong and Lurnlng lL '%.(0$- whaL Lhlngs are
golng Lo be llke when you're beuer.
1haL ls, dolng Lhls exerclse helps you sLarL prlmlng your braln wlLh a blueprlnL of /%.
yoo woot to be.
! #$%# &'()*+,+ -*.)/*01+23*4 561
ASSIGNMLN1 1
BuiIding seIf esteem
uownload 8ulldlng self esLeem and llsLen Lo your download
- every day
- aL leasL once a day
- for 7 days
- or unul you nouce 3% )&3$% /3), of Lhe progress lndlcaLors shown below
rogress
*5+*63%(0$
- you beg|n to fee| nonceab|y |ess sure abouL some of Lhe
negauve ldeas you've held abouL yourself, less cerLaln Lhey are
accuraLe
- you ,&&) 63)-&0 when you Lhlnk abouL who you are
- you feel more opnm|snc abouL whaL you can do ln Lhe fuLure
- you sLarL Lo feel more re|axed and conhdent ln dally llfe
- you nd yourself acuvely |ook|ng forward Lo maklng even
more changes
:2'')&-&5%301 -3%&0*3)
ReIated downIoads avaiIabIe to purchase
LeL go of Lhe
pasL
See your pasL ln a new llghL - and Lurn your auenuon Lo Lhe fuLure
Recommended FREE articIes
Pow Lo boosL self esLeem
Low self esLeem
! #$%# &'()*+,+ -*.)/*01+23*4 561
8emember, you don'L have Lo nouce all Lhese shls aL once, buL you can expecL Lo
experlence Lhem more and more as you progress Lhrough Lhe 10 sLeps Lo solld self
esLeem course.
8lghL, we've Laken Lhe rsL sLep, buL lL's lmporLanL Lo really relax wlLh Lhls maLerlal, and
famlllarlze yourself wlLh lL Lo Lhe polnL LhaL you acLually become 'experL' ln lL, and lL
becomes parL of you.
nexL ume we'll be addresslng someLhlng vlLally lmporLanL Lo Lhe experlence of self
esLeem - how we feel ln relauon Lo oLhers and, ln parucular, how outocuve we feel,
physlcally and as a person generally.
unul our nexL sLep!
Mark
9%'"-
(1) lor example see: Ame, l., & 8rooks-Cunn, !. (1989). uevelopmenL of eaung problems ln adolescenL glrls:
A longlLudlnal sLudy. uevelopmeot lsycboloqy, 23, 70-77 and nlcolas Lmler: '1he Lmler reporL 2001, 1he
causes and consequences of low self worLh.'
(2) See nlcolas Lmler: '1he Lmler 8eporL 2001, 1he causes and consequences of low self worLh.'
! #$%# &'()*+,+ -*.)/*01+23*4 561
8u||d|ng se|f esteem - rogress Checker
uaLe: ___________________________
now true are these statements of you? SllghLly arLly lalrly MosLly 1oLally
l am beglnnlng Lo quesuon wheLher my negauve plcLure
of myself ls really accuraLe
l don'L geL so anxlous or upseL when l Lhlnk abouL who l
am and whaL l am llke
l am feellng more opumlsuc abouL whaL l can do ln Lhe
fuLure
l feel more condenL and relaxed generally
l am really looklng forward Lo maklng posluve changes for
myself
uaLe: ___________________________
now true are these statements of you? SllghLly arLly lalrly MosLly 1oLally
l am beglnnlng Lo quesuon wheLher my negauve plcLure
of myself ls really accuraLe
l don'L geL so anxlous or upseL when l Lhlnk abouL who l
am and whaL l am llke
l am feellng more opumlsuc abouL whaL l can do ln Lhe
fuLure
l feel more condenL and relaxed generally
l am really looklng forward Lo maklng posluve changes for
myself
I hope you found Step 1 of the 10 steps
to solid self esteem course useful
If you would like to try the whole course, you can read about it here.
All my very best,
Mark Tyrrell
Co-founder of Hypnosis Downloads
Author of 10 Steps to Solid Self Esteem