The Empowered Life And Your Connection To The Soul-Self By Cassandra Blizzard

The Empowered Life And Your Connection To The Soul-Self Cassandra D. Blizzard http !!cassandra"lizzard.com All ri#hts reser$ed. The reproduction or utilization of this wor% in whole or in part in an& form "& an& electronic' mechanical' or other means' now %nown or hereafter in$ented' includin# an& information and stora#e retrie$al s&stem' is for"idden without the prior written consent of the pu"lisher and author. (or information a"out )fair use') contact the author. *u"lished in the +nited States of America.

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Special thank you to my husband Don for believing in me when others did not. All my love.

Boo%s B& Cassandra Blizzard ,Se$en Years of Surrender, ,A -orld -ithout Color, ,The .od *oint, ,The Empowered Life And Your Connection To The Soul-Self, ,The Empowered Life The -or%"oo%,

Contents A /ote (rom The Author The 0rdinar& Chaos 0f Life The Core Self E1plained *ersonal *ower Concepts The A#reements -e 2a%e *erceptions of Self 0ur 0pinion 0f Self Can 3elp +s 0r 3urt +s -a&s That -e .i$e 0ur *ersonal *ower Awa& 3ow -e +n%nowin#l& Sa"ota#e Self (ear 3ow -e 2a%e The 2a4or Decisions 5n Life 6elationships *eople *leasin# -hen 5t 2atters Too 2uch The Seriousl& Sensiti$e 5ndi$idual And The Challen#es -e (ace Thin#s Be&ond 0ur Control So Tired 0f The Stru##le Ta%in# Your *ower Bac% Self-6eliance A /ew *erspecti$e of Self The E#o That -or%s (or You Settin# *ositi$e Boundaries Ena"lin# Self B& Settin# 6easona"le .oals 5n Life Self Acceptance -hen You 2a%e A 2ista%e Soul 3elp Disco$erin# The Core You -hat You -ere Born To Do The /ew Balanced You

A Note From The Author

This "oo% was "orne from &ears of conductin# sessions with clients from all o$er the world. 5 "e#an to see patterns with people' e$en m&self' and 5 #ot to a point that 4ust tellin# people what was comin# into their future wasn7t enou#h for me. 5 wanted to #i$e them the tools to ma%e positi$e chan#es in their life' and the tools to deal with difficulties and challen#es in their life. 5 wanted people to understand the core of the Soul' how the Soul percei$es ph&sical life' and 5 wanted people to learn how to find 4o& in life. 0$erall' 5 4ust wanted more for m& clients. A small percenta#e of people will #o to a ps&chic 4ust to tr& to see around corners' so to spea%. The& want to %now what is comin#. 8ust tellin# them somethin# is not necessaril& empowerin#. 5n fact' 4ust the tellin# of somethin# without the tools to na$i#ate o"stacles can "e disempowerin#. So' 5 "e#an to add su"stance to m& readin#s "& coachin# people on how to deal with an&thin# ne#ati$e' how to chan#e their relationships' how the& $iew Self' how to ha$e success' how to percei$e success' and how to remo$e stum"lin# "loc%s. Essentiall&' 5 was teachin# them to "e empowered and happ& and to ta%e control of their li$es. /ot e$er&one wants this. Some people still want the standard issue ps&chic readin#. E$en worse' some people want the standard tarot card readin#. But with a standard tarot card readin#' clients can #o awa& from the ta"le and feel worried' stressed' and totall& powerless to effect positi$e chan#e in their li$es. -hat7s the point of that9 5t7s the ultimate disempowerin# e1perience. 2& "oo% series is for all the Soul see%ers out there who want somethin# more out of their ph&sical life. This particular "oo%-set The Empowered Life And Your Connection To Your Soul-Self and The Empowered Life The -or%"oo% emphasizes the wa&s in which we #i$e awa& our personal power' how we allow others to disempower us' how we disempower Self' and is an aide in helpin# to achie$e a health& "alance in life and mo$e toward a more positi$e' fulfillin# future. These "oo%s are meant to "e used to#ether as a set' and the& are not meant to "e casuall& read in one sittin#. (ar from it. Both of these "oo%s are meant to "e used repeatedl& and di#ested o$er time. You ma& find some thin#s within the "oo% to "e repetiti$e' "ut there is a purpose "ehind that. These "oo%s are constructed so that &ou can #o to an& section and #ain information without constantl& flippin# "ac% and forth in frustratin# searches. These "oo%s are meant to enhance &our life and are meant to "e used whene$er &ou need them. Don7t e1pect to read throu#h these "oo%s in a few da&s. Ta%e it slowl& and' little "it "& little "it' a"sor" what is offered within these pa#es. The Empowered Life And Your Connection To The Soul-Self and The Empowered Life The -or%"oo% each can stand on their own' "ut it7s "est if &ou read the entire series as it was meant to "e a"sor"ed in a particular order' startin# with Se$en Years of Surrender' A -orld -ithout Color' and The .od *oint. 5f nothin# else' at least read The .od *oint for a deeper understandin# of the Soul. The first half of The Empowered Life And Your Connection To The Soul-Self is all a"out the wa&s in which we #i$e our personal power awa&' while the second half helps &ou to "e#in a new 4ourne& toward self-disco$er&' healin#' and "alance.

There are $er& few people who escape this ph&sical life without ha$in# the e1perience of feelin# li%e #i$in# up. Life can #et so hectic and out of control at times that we feel li%e we don7t ha$e an& control at all. -hat we "elie$e a"out oursel$es "ecomes our realit&: and in so man& wa&s' what we "elie$e a"out oursel$es forms our future. 57m not spea%in# in air&-fair&' /ew A#e terms here. 5 am tal%in# a"out the real deal. -hat we "elie$e a"out Self is critical to our emotional' ps&cholo#ical' and ph&sical well "ein#. 5t7s important that we all learn to harness our "eliefs and to understand that our "eliefs can "e a detrimental force in our li$es or the& can "e a positi$e force in our li$es. 2an& people %now what the& dont want in life' almost without #i$in# it an& thou#ht' and the& li$e their life in a sort of a$oidance pattern. -hen we li$e "& this a$oidance pattern' we stop focusin# on where we are supposed to "e and what we reall&' reall& want to do in life. -e sta& rooted in this a$oidance pattern until we "elie$e that that is what life is all a"out and that is all we #et in life. 2ost people who are stuc% in intolera"le situations "elie$e that the& don7t ha$e an& control o$er their life. That7s where 5 come in. E$er&one to some de#ree has control o$er their life. -e ma%e choices dail& that either "ind us or free us. But we sometimes for#et that we e$en ha$e a choice in an& #i$en situation. And some of us are not aware that e$en how, if, or when we ma%e a choice is in itself a choice. ;-ell'< &ou mi#ht ar#ue. ;-hat if &ou are a prisoner of war' and &ou7re stuc% in a concentration camp somewhere' &ou #et fed one slop-meal a da&' if that' and &ou ha$e no contact with an&one "ut &our prison #uards9 You don7t ha$e an& control o$er that' do &ou9< You ma& not ha$e control o$er where &ou currentl& are' "ut &ou still ha$e control o$er the "elief s&stem that &ou form in &our head dail&. You ha$e control o$er what &ou thin% and feel a"out the situation. And &ou can still "elie$e that &ou will find freedom e$er& sin#le da&' e$en when faced with the worst possi"le circumstances' rather than "elie$in# that &ou will rot in that prison fore$er. 0ur paradi#ms dri$e us' one wa& or the other. You ha$e to willfull& choose how &ou want to "e steered. 5f &ou are the captain of &our "oat called life' then &our hands need to firml& remain on the wheel that mo$es the rudder. You can7t "e the captain of &our "oat called life if &ou allow other people to form &our paradi#ms' &our "eliefs a"out Self. All of us are suscepti"le to the dail& onslau#ht that tells us who we are and what we should thin%' feel' and "e. But we don7t ha$e to ca$e in to this dail& onslau#ht. -e can learn to maintain our personal power' li$e in "alance' and mo$e forward in a health&' producti$e' and happ& wa&. An&one' includin# we success coaches' who tells &ou that their life is perfect is full of crap. Life is frau#ht with the une1pected. Sometimes that une1pected is a #ood thin#' sometimes it is a "ad thin#. The %e& is in how &ou process life and how &ou $alue Self alon# the 4ourne&. Your feelin#s a"out Self and a"out Life ma%es a difference' and we ha$e to "e mindful a"out how we e$aluate Self and Life throu#hout our 4ourne& of Life. And 5 will show &ou how to do that in the followin# pa#es. 0pen &our mind to the possi"ilities' and understand &ourself li%e ne$er "efore. Harness your thoughts or your thoughts will harness you.

The

rdinary Chaos

f Life

The phone is rin#in#. You hesitate to answer it "ecause &ou %now a creditor could "e on the other end of the line' demandin# that &ou pa& the hospital "ill &ou could ne$er afford in the first place. 0r it could "e &our new friend' the one &ou met at wor%' the one &ou suspect is sta""in# &ou in the "ac% with the "i# "oss while she pretends to "e &our "est friend to &our face. -h& tal% to her' ri#ht9 Another insistent rin#. 2a&"e it7s the #u& tr&in# to sell &ou &ard ser$ice. Do &ou reall& feel li%e dealin# with that ri#ht now9 5t7s Saturda&' a da& that &ou should "e spendin# some =ualit& time re-ac=uaintin# &ourself with somethin# called total rela1ation' "ecause &ou wor% hard and it7s "een so lon# since &ou had a moment of silence' a moment of comfort' peace' and 4o&. 5nstead' &ou ha$e to do the laundr& that7s "een pilin# up all wee%' and then there7s the trip to the #rocer& store' and after that &ou reall& need to ta%e a loo% at "alancin# &our chec%"oo%' which does nothin# to ease the feelin# of impendin# doom han#in# o$er &ou "ecause &ou had to ta%e that little trip to the emer#enc& room when &ou twisted &our an%le tr&in# to mow the #rass. You ha$e to pa& for those 1-ra&s' the se$en hours &ou spent waitin# in a cold room full of nurses' doctors' and patients who don7t #i$e a fi# a"out &ou and &our pro"lems. -or% is a whole other topic. You want a raise' and &ou want &our "oss to offer "etter health insurance. You don7t feel confident enou#h to loo% for a "etter 4o". You %now &ou are stuc% in that dead-end 4o". There is alwa&s a "i# %not in &our chest' "ecause &ou are li$in# on stress and adrenaline' alwa&s in fear of the ne1t pro"lem that &ou %now will crop up' pro"a"l& "efore &ou ha$e e$en handled the current pro"lem. You feel disenfranchised' lonel&' and fed up. But worst of all &ou feel helpless' hopeless' and without faith in the world or &ourself. -here did life #o wron#9 3ow did &ou ma%e so man& wron# turns9 And how can &ou #et thin#s "ac% on trac% a#ain9 -here7s the happ& life &ou dreamed of when &ou left hi#h school and went off to colle#e9 You pro"a"l& thou#ht &ou had the world "& the tail at that time. Life was mapped out. (inish colle#e' start a career' en4o& a romance' #et married' ha$e %ids' retire with some mone& in the "an%. A comforta"le life was on the radar somewhere "etween whoopin# it up in &our late teens to mid-twenties and retirement. You pro"a"l& ne$er ima#ined that life could $eer so drasticall& out of control when &ou least e1pected it. The hardest part is disco$erin# that &ou ma& ha$e had somethin# to do with dri$in# thin#s into the ditch. /ow &ou feel o$er-wor%ed' underpaid' o$erstressed' and frazzled "& the lac% of 4o& in &our life. And &ou feel li%e &ou don7t ha$e an& choice in the matter. You feel powerless to chan#e &our life e$en thou#h chan#e is a mere choice awa&. +nderstandin# that &ou ha$e a choice is powerful. 2ost of us that are mired in the dail& #rind fear ma%in# a choice' fear ma%in# chan#es. 0ur fear "ecomes our stum"lin# "loc%' an o"stacle that %eeps us stuc%. -e feel that we can7t mo$e forward' e$er. E$er&thin# will sta& the same' alwa&s.

/ot so. Chan#e is ine$ita"le. You can harness chan#e' or &ou can allow chan#e to sweep &ou alon# in a craz& rush of one catastrophe after another as &ou flow downstream in a chaotic swirl of seemin#l& random e$ents. But if &ou harness the power of choice' &ou "e#in to realize some truths in life. Truths a"out those seemin#l& random e$ents and all those o"stacles in &our path. /ot to mention those darn paradi#ms. Choices. -e ma%e them e$er& minute of e$er& da&. -hat to ha$e for "rea%fast' what to wear to wor%' what mo$ie to watch' where to ta%e a $acation. These are all dail& choices that drift past us without our e$en "ein# aware of the underl&in# power of our choices. The dail& #rind. 5t sweeps us all into its flow and doesn7t let us #o' from cradle to #ra$e. But if we set anchor and stop that flow for a few moments' #et out of the ri$er of destin&' stop and ta%e a loo% around' we mi#ht 4ust come to some realizations a"out Self and Life that help us to #row' to "e "older' to li$e "etter' and to ma%e our own path easier. E$er&thin# a"out our future hin#es on a choice we made &esterda& or toda&. +nderstandin# &our power of choice is hu#e. 5n fact' understandin# &our power of choice is one of the most important principles in life. Bad choices turn us into $ictims of life. 2a%in# a "ad choice can result in ne#ati$e in$estments' such as depression' an1iet&' alcoholism' dru#s' and the li%e. /o matter what "ad or wron# choices &ou feel that &ou7$e made in the past' e$er&thin# can chan#e ri#ht here' ri#ht now' with 4ust a few simple techni=ues. -ell' not reall& techni=ues...more of an understandin#. You can chan#e the wa& &ou li$e' the wa& &ou thin%' the wa& &ou lo$e' the wa& &ou see &ourself and others. And in ma%in# these chan#es' &ou open &ourself to a whole new $ista with so man& possi"ilities and so much potential. -e all want to ha$e a "alanced life' a life with 4o&' happiness' and reasons to lau#h. -e want to feel fulfilled' and we want to li$e with purpose. -e want a rewardin# life. That7s hard to do if we feel li%e a $ictim "ein# %noc%ed around "& the world at lar#e. Ta%in# control of one7s life re=uires a deeper understandin# of Self and Soul. 5t re=uires an in-depth loo% at what dri$es us to ma%e the choices in our li$es that tend to lea$e us flounderin# and feelin# not so #reat a"out oursel$es and life in #eneral. The u#l& truth is that life is not perfect. Life is ne$er #oin# to "e perfect. 5t7s alwa&s #oin# to present us with some sort of conflict. -e are all #oin# to ha$e challen#es in life' "ut those challen#es don7t ha$e to sin% us. -e can meet them head on' na$i#ate the challen#es much easier' and define our future in a much more rewardin# wa&. 5 won7t lie to &ou: life isn7t alwa&s eas&. Life tends to hurl all sorts of a#onies our wa& and alwa&s at the worst possi"le time. 3a$e &ou e$er had a moment when one "ad thin# happens' followed "& another' followed "& another' until it all feels endless' and &ou start to feel li%e ma&"e it will ne$er end and ma&"e &ou should 4ust #i$e up' #i$e in' and =uit9 .uess what9 So ha$e 5. Se$eral times in m& life' in fact. But 5 ne$er stopped dreamin#' and 5 ne$er did actuall& =uit or #i$e up on m&self. 5 alwa&s %new that m& Soul had a plan' and if 5 4ust listened' 5 mi#ht hear the words of m& Soul and if 5 heeded that little' inner $oice' 5 would "e o%a&. /o matter what is happenin# in &our life ri#ht now' &ou can li$e in such a wa& that &ou sta& centered' focused' and happ& e$en when facin# o"stacles. There7s onl& one catch to this wa& of life. You must "elie$e. Simpl& "elie$e. Believe in what? &ou mi#ht as%. Your Soul. The Soul of e$er& li$in# creature on this planet. A stron# "elief in &our Soul will help &ou to achie$e a full life' a life that &ou7$e onl& dreamed of ha$in#. Belief in &our Soul will help &ou to create "alance in &our life. 5t7s much easier to ma%e =ualit& decisions from a place of "alance. (rom this state of "alance' &ou will

achie$e a calm' rela1ed wa& of loo%in# at the world. You will achie$e a confidence in &ourself and &our a"ilit& to ma%e positi$e decisions for &ourself. And &ou will no lon#er feel li%e &ou are "attlin# throu#h life feelin# li%e &ou ha$e no control o$er thin#s. This ma& sound li%e a lot of wor%. You mi#ht ima#ine ha$in# to sit with pen and paper writin# endless 4ournals or "u&in# hundreds of dollars worth of self-help "oo%s and $ideos. But that7s not reall& the case here. All it ta%es is a few twea%s here and there in the wa& we $iew the world' the wa& we $iew Self' and the wa& we $iew others. Yes' it ta%es focus and practice and dedication to reall& #et a handle on what 5 present in this "oo%. But once &ou learn these few principles' li$in# from the Core Self "ecomes a "reeze. And life #ets easier. /ot perfect. But easier.

The Core Self E!plained

Somewhere deep down we all ha$e this sense' this %nowin# that somethin# lies "e&ond our ph&sical "od&' or what 5 call the *h&sical Self. /o matter the reli#ious "ac%#round or the lac% thereof' we all at some point in our li$es will ha$e a Soul e1perience. -e naturall& sense the presence of our Soul. Some people choose not to "elie$e in the Soul' "ut their lac% of "elief does not mean their Soul does not e1ist. The Soul is alwa&s there' sometimes deli"eratel& shunned "& the *h&sical Aspect of Self' sometimes inad$ertentl& for#otten' "ut still...alwa&s there. E$en science has pro$en that there is so much more "e&ond the ordinar& perceptions of the human "rain. Loo% "ac% in histor& and &ou will find scores of archeolo#ical e$idence showin# that people of ancient times alwa&s "elie$ed in somethin# "e&ond the ph&sical "od&. Throu#hout time' the Soul has "een depicted in a m&riad of wa&s across all cultures. This "elief in the Soul is innate' with us from "irth' "ecause at the time of our "irth' we remem"er where we came from. -e remem"er that we ha$e a spiritual part of our "ein# that e1isted lon# "efore the ph&sical "od& came into this world. As children we ha$e not &et "een tau#ht dis"elief. -e simpl&' and $er& naturall&' "elie$e. Deep in our core we %now the truth of who we are and who we ha$e alwa&s "een. -e ma& turn awa& from that %nowin# for $arious reasons' "ut the %nowin# ne$er reall& #oes awa&. This part of us that is somehow loc%ed into our cells' into our $er& D/A' and &et is somehow "e&ond us can "e descri"ed as spiritual or ener#etic or "oth. Either wa&' the Soul is part of the Core You. The Soul and the Bod& share space "ut in different dimensions. -here the Soul and the Bod& con4oin' 5 call this the Core Self' althou#h to use the term con4oined to descri"e the Soul is not entirel& accurate. The la&ers of our e1istence are far more comple1 than that. 5n essence' the Soul is interwo$en into e$er& cell of our ph&sical "od&' ener#eticall& sealed and &et ha$in# a space all its own where it operates and e1ists separate from the human "od&. Your Soul is "oth present with the "od&' a part of the "od&' and &et a separate entit& in and of itself. You are ne$er without &our Soul an&more than &our Soul is e$er without the *h&sical Aspect of itSelf. But some people will #o throu#h life with the Soul in a sort of in absentia state of "ein#. 5n essence' the& #o throu#h life i#norin# or ne#lectin# the Soul-Self. This is partiall& due to the fact that some people are terrified of #i$in# up control. The& feel that to "elie$e in the Soul is to #i$e up a part of Self that represents control o$er life' and the& ma& ha$e "een tau#ht "& parents' reli#ion' or societ& in #eneral' that the Soul would re=uire somethin# from them' somethin# that the& aren7t willin# to #i$e up' some $ice or ha"it or wa& of life. The& are afraid that to full& "elie$e in the Soul would mean that their personalit&' or what 5 refer to as the *ersona' would "e lost to them as the& #i$e themsel$es o$er to some hi#her power that e1acts perfection. >The *ersona is more full& descri"ed in m& "oo% The .od *oint.? 5t is unfortunate that some people fall into this trap' this illusion' "ecause we can onl& full& li$e life when we are li$in# from the Core Self. 5n truth' we lose nothin# when we full& "elie$e in the Soul. 5nstead'

we #ain e$er&thin#. The onl& real re=uirement of the Soul is that we understand our purpose on this earth' in this ph&sical form' "oth our personal Life *urpose and our o$erall Soul *urpose. So' to sum it up' the Core Self is that point of reference in space' if &ou will' that 4oins the "od& and the Soul into one mind. Bein# full& aware of oursel$es as a Soul "ein# and as a *h&sical "ein# "rin#s indescri"a"le inner peace and also "rin#s a sense of "alance that can "e achie$ed throu#h no other means. (urthermore' li$in# a life full& aware of the Soul' the Core Self' offers us an unmatched #uidance throu#hout our lifetime. The entire platform of this "oo% is to help each indi$idual to re#ain that "alance in life "& li$in# from the Core Self' and to learn to see where the pro"lem areas in life are' and to learn how to na$i#ate life in a much simpler' happier wa&. 2ost importantl&' 5 hi#hli#ht wa&s in which we lose si#ht of the Soul and wa&s in which we disempower Self. 5t7s important for all of us to understand the "eaut&' the simplicit&' and the power of the Soul-actualized life. And it7s important for us to understand how we lose our personal power and our awareness of our Soul-Self. There are "eha$iors and reactions that cause us to lose si#ht of our Core Self' which will cause us to lapse into disempowerin# "eha$iors and "eliefs. You must first reco#nize these "eha$iors and paradi#ms "efore &ou can realize Self and learn to maintain &our personal power and &our connection to &our Soul-Self. As pre$iousl& stated' we can choose to wal% this earth without the aid of the Soul' e$en thou#h we are ne$er reall& without the Soul. But if we choose to willfull&' or e$en un%nowin#l&' i#nore the 5nner -itness' the 5nner @oice >our own intuition?' we tend to li$e life in a chaotic wa&' sort of li%e free fallin# off a cliff without a parachute. You ne$er =uite %now what will happen. You could sur$i$e the landin#' dependin# on where &ou land' "ut &ou reall& don7t %now what will happen as &ou fall' and durin# the fall 5 can promise that &ou will feel helpless and terrified. You can7t latch onto an&thin# that will sa$e &ou. 2ost times nothin# will come out of the "lue and offer &ou sal$ation. You can onl& hope that &ou ha$e a =uic% death or a cush& landin# that pre$ents total annihilation. 5f &ou had "een tuned in to &our 5nner -itness from the "e#innin# of life' &ou mi#ht ne$er ha$e fallen off the cliff in the first place' in which case &ou would not feel so helpless and out of control durin# the fall' and &ou wouldn7t ha$e to worr& a"out what "ad end &ou mi#ht come to when &ou hit "ottom. 5f &ou don7t %now who &ou are at the Core' then &ou are onl& li$in# a half life. -e are tau#ht what to "elie$e a"out Self from "irth. 2ostl& from parents' #randparents' teachers' leaders' peers' e$en enemies' and also from societ& itself' from the trends in clothin#' ad$ertisin#' cars. You name it: we are alwa&s soa%in# it up' suc%in# it in' and moldin# ourSel$es to fit the paradi#ms' the rules' the reli#ions' the ideas' the concepts of e$er&thin# around us instead of li$in# simpl& from the Core Self. +nfortunatel&' these ;teachers< ma& not "e li$in# a "alanced life themsel$es' and so' without realizin# the dama#e the& do' the& pass on their own paradi#ms and "eliefs so that the ne1t #eneration will ;%now< not onl& how to act in societ& "ut also how to $iew Self and 0thers. 5f we all #rew up in a societ& that tau#ht the principles in this "oo%' we would ha$e a $er& different $iew of Self than what the #eneral population understands to "e Self. 5f &ou were "orn to a mother who "elie$ed in her own Soul and the power of the Soul' &ou will pro"a"l& #o on to li$e a fairl& "alanced life. That is' if &ou are stron# enou#h to pa& more attention to &our Soul than to what other people tell &ou a"out &ourself. But most of us are "orn into families that hold onto "elief s&stems that #o "ac% for centuries' e$ol$in# o$er time' "ut alwa&s ma%in# a similar mista%e in human de$elopment. 2ost of us de$elop alon# a trend that tells us the opposite of what we should "elie$e a"out Self. -hether this de$elopment comes from old reli#ious

paradi#ms or familial teachin#s or peer pressure' we "e#in to de$elop away from the Soul' awa& from our true path in life. (or e1ample' as a child' one of &our teachers ma& ha$e told &ou that &our true path in life was to "e an educator' while &our Soul was tellin# &ou that &ou are supposed to "e a "allet dancer who tra$els the world. 5nstead of followin# the tu# of &our heart' &ou pla& it safe and heed the teacher7s ad$ice. 5nstead of li$in# an authentic life' as we #row into adulthood' we "e#in to li$e a life of paradi#ms and false "eliefs. -e "uild a foundation on top of these false "eliefs and paradi#ms that we #athered o$er the &ears from these different e1periences and these different people in our li$es. +nfortunatel&' "uildin# a foundation on a false "elief ma%es us wo""le throu#h life' ne$er =uite %nowin# who we are or how we fit in' and ne$er reall& findin# our true power center. 5t "ecomes a life of im"alance rather than a life in "alance. You are ne$er alone. E$en when &ou feel li%e &ou are at the "ottom' wallowin# in the worst possi"le scenario of life' &ou are not alone. Your Soul is alwa&s there' alwa&s offerin# #uidance' and alwa&s #i$in# &ou the #ift of +ni$ersal Lo$e. This understandin# is one of the most powerful concepts &ou will e$er ha$e throu#hout &our life. You alwa&s ha$e You to lean on. The dualistic part of You' the Soul part of &ou' the Core You. That part of &ou that is ne$er wron# and ne$er moti$ated "& an&thin# "ut the Lo$e of the .od Source. /ow' how do we #et from the chaos of life to the personal power unit that &ou need to "e in order to ha$e a "etter' happier' more peaceful life9 -e "e#in with understandin# how we arri$ed at the chaos of life in the first place. -e simpl& learned life the wron# wa&. /ow let7s learn life the ri#ht wa&.

"ersonal "ower Concepts

*ersonal *ower. Almost e$er&one has heard of this concept. (rom spiritualit& to life coachin# to ps&cholo#&' personal power has "een discussed all across the "oard. But what is personal power9 -ell' it7s somewhat difficult to descri"e. You could li%en it to a sort of core unit that %eeps &ou directed' moti$ated' happ&' focused' and "alanced. -hen that core unit of personal power is off %ilter' &our moti$ation plummets' &our focus declines' &our happiness is undermined' and &our life #oes into a state of im"alance. 5 call it "ein# pulled off center. 8ust li%e &our mind' &our will' and &our emotions' personal power doesn7t reside in an& particular location' "ut &ou can measure how much personal power &ou ha$e "& how &ou feel a"out Self. You alwa&s %now that &our personal power is in a state of decline "& how much chaos is in &our life' "& how misdirected &ou feel' and "& how "ad &ou feel a"out &ourself. Con$ersel&' &ou can "et that &our personal power tan% is full when &ou are focused' directed' determined' moti$ated' happ&' and feelin# #ood a"out &ourself. +nderstandin# personal power and #uardin# &our personal power is so important "ecause how much personal power &ou ha$e determines &our success in e$er& area of life' from relationships to career to recreational time. 5f &ou are constantl& #i$in# awa& &our personal power' &ou won7t ha$e the #uts to chase success. You won7t e$en feel worth& of success. And &ou will "e afraid of ma%in# e$en "asic decisions in life. 0ur personal power can "e drained from us in seemin#l& harmless wa&s' or it can "e drained from us in "i#' o"$ious wa&s. To #i$e &ou an e1ample of ha$in# &our personal power pulled off center from a seemin#l& harmless source' we will use social media as a "ac%drop. An#ie has a social media account. 0n the surface' this social media acti$it& seems $er& positi$e. She7s "een a"le to use this social media account to reconnect with some old hi#h school friends and ac=uaintances. But little "it "& little "it' this online social acti$it& "e#ins to undermine her personal power core. 3ere7s how. C&nthia' a lon#time friend of An#ie7s is constantl& commentin# on another woman7s social pa#e' "ut she rarel& posts an&thin# in response to An#ie. An#ie feels somewhat dismissed or inconse=uential' "ecause she7s %nown C&nthia for so man& &ears' and she doesn7t understand wh& C&nthia i#nores her on this social media outlet. C&nthia7s "eha$ior hurts An#ie. But C&nthia is onl& one spo%e in the wheel. Bl&the is an old friend from hi#h school' with whom An#ie has onl& recentl& connected. 0n the same social media outlet' Bl&the ma%es a remar% to a third part& a"out how An#ie was a dor% "ac% in hi#h school. An#ie tries to i#nore the comment' "ut it sta&s with her for da&s. 2eanwhile' &et another spo%e in this wheel' Anna' a co-wor%er' is also sharin# the same social media outlet. 0ne da&' An#ie notices a post from Anna in$itin# a fellow co-wor%er to lunch. An#ie is surprised "ecause Anna and An#ie ha$e alwa&s #otten alon# well' whereas Anna alwa&s acted li%e she didn7t li%e the other co-wor%er. Anna and An#ie used to ha$e lunch to#ether nearl& e$er& wor% da&' "ut now Anna and the co-wor%er are lunchin# to#ether on a re#ular "asis. An#ie feels misled and lied to. The pileup of ne#ati$e emotions from these three

sore spots are "e#innin# to wear on An#ie. Little "it "& little "it' An#ie is startin# to feel offended' dismissed' i#nored' and disli%ed. -hat seemed li%e a positi$e outlet has now "ecome a point of contention' effecti$el& de-powerin# An#ie7s Core *ersonal *ower unit and ma%in# her feel deflated. 5n 4ust a few short months' An#ie7s perception of Self has ta%en a nosedi$e' and she "e#ins to =uestion her friendships' her choices' and e$en her own intuition. She retreats from the world and "ecomes =uiet' unwillin# to interact with her co-wor%ers. This reacti$e "eha$ior causes the wor%place to "e pulled off "alance and di$ides An#ie from the rest of the pac%' which in turn compounds An#ie7s feelin#s of suddenl& "ein# unwanted and disli%ed. All "ecause of the comments people made within the pa#es of this online social communit&. B& this time' An#ie is feelin# depressed' lonel&' and she doesn7t trust that her friends are "ein# #enuine with her. She has allowed the actions of others to pull her off center' and in doin# so she has #i$en awa& "its and pieces of her personal power. Bein# personall& empowered means that &ou %now who &ou are at the core' &ou respect' lo$e' and appreciate &ourSelf. You are moti$ated and forward thin%in#. You ha$e a health& amount of am"ition. You loo% forward to each new da&. You en4o& life. You %now other people lo$e and respect &ou. You focus on the positi$e thin#s in life. You trust &our intuition. E$en when facin# o"stacles' &ou maintain a positi$e outloo% and a stron# "elief that all will "e well in the lon# run. Challen#es do not cripple &ou: the& onl& slow &ou down a "it. You see% out relationships with li%e-minded people' and &ou don7t allow other people to define who &ou are at the core. You mi#ht assume that women are most suscepti"le to ha$in# their personal power unit leeched. /ot so. 2en are 4ust as suscepti"le' "ut men don7t tal% a"out these issues as much as women do' and men tend to mo$e on to other thin#s much easier and much =uic%er than women do. *ersonal power is so important to the e#o side of us and so important in maintainin# a positi$e outloo% on life in #eneral. 3a$in# said that' personal power is not a"out e#o. 5t7s not a"out "ein# self-important. *ersonal power is much more su"tle and has no ne#ati$e connotations. *ersonal power is more of a continuous stream of feed"ac%' or ener#& if &ou will' that is $itall& connected to &our emotional state of "ein#. A state of mind that dri$es &our perception of Self. 5f that perception of Self "ecomes ne#ati$e' &our life "ecomes a chaotic mess. 5t7s important to learn how important &our *ersonal Core *ower unit is to &our dail& life and &our perception of Self. And it7s important to %now how &ou #i$e awa& that personal power' usuall& on a dail& "asis' without e$en realizin# &ou are doin# so. 5 discuss the $ar&in# aspects of the e#o in m& "oo% A -orld -ithout Color. 57m not one to want to crush the e#o into o"li$ion. The e#o is not a ne#ati$e thin#. 5n fact' certain aspects of the e#o are necessar& to our dail& e1istence. That is not to sa& that e#omania is desira"le. Certainl& not. But what is desira"le is a health& e#o' what 5 call the Centered E#o. 5n m& "oo% A -orld -ithout Color' 5 discuss in more depth a"out how the 5rrational E#o pulls us off center' and this in turn desta"ilizes our personal power. -hen we allow the 5rrational E#o to e1pand and #row' we can7t ma%e clear decisions a"out our life. And this is precisel& what has happened to An#ie "& allowin# the people in her online social #roup to #et under her s%in. The 5rrational E#o has o$erpowered the 6ational E#o and undermined her personal power' which in turn de#rades her perception of Self. The positi$e perception of Self comes from the Centered E#o. -hen &ou are operatin# from the Centered E#o' &ou %now who &ou are at the core' &ou trust &our intuition' &ou "elie$e in &ourself and &our a"ilities' and &ou ha$e a health& outloo% on life. /ow perhaps &ou can see how the Centered E#o and personal power #o hand-in-hand. So' in a

sense' the Centered E#o is &our core perception of Self and how &ou $iew the world around &ou in a positi$e wa&' and &our personal power unit is the emotional state of mind that helps &ou thri$e within that world. -e #i$e awa& our personal power e$er& da& without e$en realizin# we are doin# so. Some indications that your core power is #ein$ drained% , (eelin# o$erl& frustrated when faced with situations that don7t warrant a hi#h le$el of frustration. , 2isdirected an#er. , (eelin# e1hausted or tired. , (eelin# hopeless. , (eelin# li%e no one cares a"out &ou. , (eelin# an1ious. , .eneralized depression. , (eelin# o$erwhelmed. , (eelin# li%e &ou ha$e no direction or purpose in life. , Lac% of interest in life. /ot onl& do we allow others to steal our core >personal? power' we also do it to oursel$es in a m&riad of wa&s. 0ne of the wa&s we drain our own personal power is "& self-criticism' self"lame' and inwardl& directed an#er. But it doesn7t stop there. Bein# o$erl& critical' 4ud#mental' and non-acceptin# of others also drains our core power. /e#ati$e emotion in #eneral' especiall& ne#ati$e emotions that are non-directed or misdirected' alwa&s affect our inner peace' which in turn pulls us off center. A focused indi$idual maintains a health& inner "alance and a health& core power. 5f someone is o$erl& focused on what other people are doin#' that is an indication that the& are unhapp& at the core and the& are usin# pro4ection of their emotions to mas% their core unhappiness. 5f &ou are o$erl& focused on what other people are doin#' then &ou are less focused on &our life and what &ou are doin#. *eople who are o$erl& focused on what other people do' thin%' or feel cannot maintain a health& inner "alance' and the& tend to "e o$erl& critical and 4ud#mental. 5n &our search for personal "alance' it7s important that &ou learn to reco#nize where another human "ein# mi#ht "e at in their personal 4ourne& and what their emotional state is so that &ou can %eep them in perspecti$e. -hen &ou learn to %eep the emotional state of a person in perspecti$e' it helps &ou to maintain &our core power without allowin# them to drain &ou of &our personal power. Learnin# these techni=ues offers &ou the ad$anta#e of "ein# stron# enou#h to ma%e a personal choice. 0ne part of that personal choice ma& "e to wal% awa& from the less "alanced indi$idual in order for &ou to maintain &our inner peace. A second part of that choice' "ut no less important' is to reco#nize where the& are at emotionall& so that what the& do and sa& does not affect &ou or pull &ou off center. These are the two most powerful tools in &our personal 4ourne& throu#h life' and this understandin# when put into practice will %eep &ou centered' focused' and happ&. 5n The Empowered Life The -or%"oo%' 5 will outline wa&s that &ou can reco#nize when &our personal power is "ein# drained and some of the areas of &our life that are most affected. 0ne of the first thin#s an unhapp& person will do' whether consciousl& or su"consciousl&' is to ma%e sure that &ou are also unhapp&. The& do this "& drainin# &our personal power in a

m&riad of wa&s. The& ma& criticize or 4ud#e &ou. The& ma& "e com"ati$e and confrontational' which alwa&s %eeps &ou off "alance "ecause &ou are constantl& tr&in# to a$oid or deflect their confrontational "eha$ior. The& ma& disa#ree with e$er&thin# &ou sa& and ne$er "e a"le to maintain a two-wa& con$ersation with &ou. The& ma& "e o$erl& demandin# of &our time' or 4ealous of &our time spent with other friends. The& ma& "e critical of &our spouse' parents' or children. The& ma& demand an unreasona"le de#ree of lo&alt& from &ou. The& ma& "e time stealers. The& ma& "admouth &ou to mutual friends while "ein# o$erl& sweet to &our face. And the list #oes on. 5f &ou are allowin# an& friends or relati$es to emotionall& dra# &ou around with an& of the a"o$ementioned "eha$ior then &ou ma& "e a people-pleaser at heart. 0r &ou ma& feel that it is &our dut& to put up with this sort of ne#ati$e "eha$ior "ecause &ou ha$en7t "een tau#ht an& other wa&. You ma& also worr& that if &ou were to challen#e this "eha$ior in a positi$e' focused wa& that "enefits &ou that doin# so somehow ma%es &ou a "ad person. /ot so. 5n fact' to set "oundaries in order to maintain &our core power helps &ou to "ecome a more self-actualized' peaceful' happ& person o$erall and therefore #i$es &ou the opportunit& to mo$e forward in life feelin# less encum"ered. 5n essence' &ou "e#in to li$e life more full&' and when &ou are li$in# a fuller life' e$er&one around &ou "enefits. -e will discuss in more depth how to #et &our personal power "ac% in a later chapter. (or now let7s mo$e on to the silent a#reements we ma%e.

The A$reements &e 'a(e

Si#ned' sealed' and deli$ered. -e all understand the term a#reement. -e either a#ree with somethin# someone sa&s or we do not a#ree with somethin# someone sa&s. -hen a friend as%s us to #o to lunch' we either a#ree or we do not a#ree to #o. -hen &ou and &our spouse are facin# a decision a"out a ma4or mo$e' &ou either a#ree to ma%e the mo$e or &ou do not a#ree to ma%e the mo$e. -e all also understand what it means to si#n a contract which "inds us to an a#reement made "etween two or more parties. (or e1ample' a lease a#reement. These a#reements we ma%e in the ph&sical' conscious world are eas& to see and eas& to understand. But what a"out the su"conscious a#reements we ma%e9 Those oh so su"tle a#reements that we aren7t e$en aware we are ma%in# and &et the& affect e$er& aspect of our dail& li$es. -hat a"out those a#reements9 These su"conscious a#reements underpin our conscious decisions and our self-perceptions. The& mold us' #uide us' and to a lar#e de#ree stand in the #ap "etween our success and our failure. 8ust li%e in the conscious world' ma%e the wron# a#reement and &our life can teeter out of control. 5n order to "e trul& "alanced and trul& successful in life' we must all a#ree to loo% closel& at the su"conscious a#reements we ma%e "ecause the& are the %e& to how we na$i#ate this ph&sical world. 0ur su"conscious a#reements can "e health& or unhealth&. 5t7s the unhealth& ones that we want to #et rid of "ecause these unhealth& su"conscious a#reements can do$etail with a loss of personal power. But unco$erin# these su"conscious a#reements can "e tric%&. -e tend to clin# to these su"conscious a#reements' whether the& are health& or unhealth&' and it ta%es an open mind and a willin# heart to trul& unearth our core a#reements' our core "eliefs' to cleanse and clear the Soul and #et rid of the a#reements and "eliefs that are not #ood for us. The desire to clin# to a lon# held paradi#m that ma& or ma& not "e health& is "est shown in the e1ample of reli#ion. /ow as some of &ou ma& alread& %now "& readin# m& "oo% A -orld -ithout Color' reli#ion is a stic%in# point for me. But what &ou are a"out to read is not a personal "ias. 5t7s a spiritual truth. The reli#ion that we are "orn into forms man& of our earl& paradi#ms a"out Self' the world around us' and the .od that is supposedl& "e&ond us. And sometimes those paradi#ms are a detriment. 0ne e1ample of a su"conscious a#reement that all of us ha$e made at some point in our lifetime is that of Self Blame. Self Blame on an& le$el' whether conscious or su"conscious can "e a ma4or hindrance in life and can sap &ou of personal power. Self Blame is one of the "i##est concepts in life that %eeps us in a state of im"alance and insecurit& a"out Self and the world in #eneral. And Self Blame can de$elop from some reli#ious "eliefs. Let7s ta%e the old Baptist "elief that .od is a .od of punishment. The notion that .od is a .od of punishment is all o$er the Bi"le. As the 5sraelites mo$e into and con=uer new territories' .od seemin#l& #oes "efore the chosen people and helps them to slau#hter and con=uer.

Apparentl&' accordin# to the Bi"le' .od separates himself from us "& de#rees. (or e1ample' onl& priests were allowed to enter the temple. An&one else "ein# of less pure heart and comin# so near to .od mi#ht either #et fried in their "ooties or "rin# ha$oc and punishment down upon themsel$es' their families' and their tri"e' not to mention their floc%s. These %inds of teachin#s can create deepl& em"edded and $er& powerful paradi#ms a"out Self that is an&thin# "ut positi$e. (or one thin#' this punishin# and separatist idea of .od tells &ou that &ou are not worth&. +nfortunatel&' these teachin#s ha$e "een handed down throu#h #enerations and ha$e "ranched out into reli#ions all o$er the world throu#hout time. ou are not worthy. >Their words not mine.? This refrain repeats o$er and o$er and o$er a#ain in so man& forms within the reli#ious mindset. 0ne You are not worth& to stand in the presence of .od. Two You must confess &our sins to a priest' who is more worth& than &ou to deli$er peace and for#i$eness to &our unworth& Soul. Three You can ne$er hope to achie$e the perfection of 8esus Christ and must therefore accept 8esus as &our personal sa$ior in order to enter the %in#dom of hea$en. AhemA Bscuse me9 You are in the %in#dom of hea$en e$er& sin#le second of &our life. Your Soul connects &ou to &our Source e$er& minute of e$er& da& that &ou "reathe life. E$en 8esus tau#ht this simple spiritual truth. +nfortunatel&' man7s mind #ot hold of those teachin#s and twisted them into somethin# that ma%es a"solutel& no sense' li%e the notion that this punishin# form of .od will find &our Soul unworth& for an& reason at all and flin# &ou into hellfire itself. 3ell is a construct desi#ned to scare the pants off &ou and ma%e &ou "e #ood. +nfortunatel&' the church has ne$er reall& defined ;#ood< in a wa& that &ou can #rasp onto and realize in &our own life. This lea$es &ou flounderin# and wonderin# a"out &ourSelf on a dail& "asis. 5 don7t despise reli#ion per se. 5 despise some of the underl&in# tenets. 5 was raised Baptist. Baptists tau#ht me fear and self-loathin#' "oth of which 5 stru##led to o$ercome for &ears. -asted &ears. Years that 5 could ha$e spent lo$in# m&self and seein# m&self as the Soul within. -hen 5 #rew up under the Baptist re#ime' 5 was terrified e$er& da& "ecause 5 could ne$er fi#ure out B4ust how #ood do 5 ha$e to "e in order not to #o strai#ht to hell97 .uess what this does9 5t drains &ou of &our personal power. -h&9 Because &ou are =uestionin# the $er& essence of &our "ein#. You are in effect =uestionin# the #oodness of &our Soul. You are "ein# self-critical without e$en %nowin# wh&' and &ou are creatin# a paradi#m of Self Blame. 5n fact' &ou will most assuredl& "ecome a repeat offender of Self Blame. And &ou won7t e$en %now what &ou are "lamin# &ourSelf for. Self Blame do$etails into self punishment. And some forms of reli#ion are "i# on self punishment. 0nce this paradi#m is full& seated in &our su"conscious' &ou will "elie$e that &ou are an unworth& Soul' and &ou ma& stru##le to ha$e an& %ind of personal securit& in life. You will alwa&s settle for less' &ou will end up feelin# li%e &ou are li$in# a lie as &ou cannot e$er hope to li$e up to the standards of perfection' and &our self esteem will most li%el& "e at or near roc% "ottom throu#hout &our lifetime. .od then "ecomes another form of self punishment as &ou stru##le for a perfection no one can e$er achie$e. You ma& %neel in pra&er "e##in# for deli$erance for &our lo$e of "lue 4eans and earrin#s' sta& in a horri"l& a"usi$e and lo$eless marria#e' and ne$er stand up for &ourself as &ou hum"l& turn the other chee% for e$er&one to slap. Don7t for#et' while 8esus was turnin# the other chee%' he was also flippin# o$er mone& chan#er ta"les in the temple. >0r' at least' accordin# to the Bi"le' he was turnin# his chee% and flippin# ta"les.?

So' these reli#ious "eliefs "ecome entrenched in such a wa& that &ou "e#in to "elie$e that .od will ultimatel& punish &ou for &our sins. This cannot "ecome truth for &ou unless &ou a#ree to it' and that a#reement will "ecome a part of &our su"conscious mind. 5t will "ecome an a#reement from which &ou automaticall& operate and from which &ou 4ud#e Self and 0thers. .od then "ecomes a form of self punishment' and &ou will spend &our life stru##lin# a#ainst the self-criticism' the insecurit&' the idea that &ou are unworth& while &our Soul mourns the fact that &ou ha$e a#reed to "elie$e in a .od that punishes. There is one sin in this world. And that sin is this 5f &ou do not honor the Soul in e$er& li$in# thin#' &ou dishonor Self and .od. 3ere7s wh& this is the onl& sin in this world. -hen &ou honor the Soul in &ourSelf and honor the Soul in e$er& other li$in# thin#' essentiall& &ou are operatin# from a Soul State of Bein#. 5n this case' &ou will ne$er cause an& harm to an&one. You will alwa&s operate from a place of honest& and inte#rit&. You will ne$er cheat' steal' co$et' lie' and &ou will ne$er commit a murder. All "ases are co$ered with this one spiritual truth. Simpl& honor the Soul in Self and e$er& other li$in# thin# and &ou also honor .od. There is no .od that punishes us. -e punish Self in a m&riad of wa&s "& operatin# from "elief s&stems that do not ser$e the #reater #ood of Soul and humanit&: "& the wa& we na$i#ate this world' "& what we "elie$e a"out Self and this world' and "& how we see Life in #eneral. 0ur paradi#ms can "e health& or harmful and' all too often' the su"conscious a#reements we ma%e a"out Self and Life are unhealth& and 4ust plain wron#. +nfortunatel&' while &ou are learnin# to honor the Soul in &ourSelf and 0thers' &our nei#h"or ma& not "e practicin# the same spiritual truth' which means that &ou still ha$e to learn to maintain a state of core "alance in the midst of the challen#es of the e1ternal world. 5n order to create "alance in our outward life' we ha$e to create "alance in our inward life. -e ha$e to sweep awa& all the old' out-dated paradi#ms that cause im"alance and learn to operate from a place of core "alance. And in order to sweep awa& these old' outdated paradi#ms' we must first unco$er the su"conscious a#reements we ma%e in life and understand which ones are health& and which ones are unhealth&. -e must then learn to form health& a#reements "ased on what the Soul "elie$es and %nows a"out Self rather than "asin# our a#reements on what 0thers ha$e told us a"out Soul' .od' and Self. 5n addition to the paradi#ms that are formed "& our earl& reli#ious practices' there are a multitude of su"conscious a#reements that we ma%e on a dail& "asis. (or e1ample' se$enteen&ear-old Terr& has a dream. 3e wants to "e a famous actor. 3e wor%s hard at his craft' ta%es actin# classes' and is in$ol$ed with school pla&s. -hen he is on sta#e' Terr& feels uplifted and empowered' which is a sure si#n that he is followin# his true Soul *ath in life. Somewhere down the road' Terr&7s fame ma& result in helpin# another Soul on their life path. But Terr&7s stepfather tells Terr& dail& that actors are #a& and that Terr& needs to #et a real profession. E$entuall&' the constant haran#ue from his stepfather con$inces Terr& that he will ne$er ma%e it. Terr& stops ta%in# actin# classes and =uits the hi#h school productions. 3e has 4ust made a su"conscious a#reement that his stepfather is correct and that he would ne$er ma%e mone& actin#. There7s a hu#e pro"lem with this powerful su"conscious a#reement. Terr& has now told his Soul what he wants in life. Terr& has told his Soul to shut down an& access he ma& ha$e had to an actin# career. Terr& #raduates hi#h school and "ecomes a mechanic' lea$in# his childhood dream "ehind. -e ha$e to "e careful a"out what we su"consciousl& a#ree to. -e must #uard oursel$es a#ainst an&one else formin# our "eliefs a"out ourSelf and our future. *s&cholo#icall&' we can "e

fra#ile. 5t7s so eas& to #et laz& and allow other people to form our paradi#ms. The su"conscious mind is a powerful resource' "ut it can also "e a powerful failin# when we allow ne#ati$e a#reements to "e formed. -h& do we do this9 -h& do we #i$e awa& our personal power so readil&9 0ne simple answer. @alidation. /ot a sin#le one of us on this planet is immune from see%in# $alidation from others. The thin#s we do on a re#ular "asis in our attempts to maintain feelin#s of $alidation are phenomenal. -e will literall& throw oursel$es under the "us tr&in# to #et $alidation from someone else' such as a father' a mother' a si"lin#' a spouse. This need for $alidation rules our li$es. But what we don7t understand is that $alidation from 0thers is sha%& at "est' #i$en to chan#e' and offers other people too much power o$er us emotionall&. -e all operate from a set of core paradi#ms or "eliefs a"out Self and the world around us. These paradi#ms shift and chan#e as we #row and assimilate more information from our en$ironment. 3a$in# a set of core "eliefs is part of our ma%eup. .i$in# awa& our personal power is not. -ould-"e actor Terr& is an e1ample of someone who allowed his stepfather to erode his core "eliefs a"out himself. Terr&7s stepfather chan#ed his paradi#m and made him "elie$e that he was unworth& of success as an actor. 0nce that paradi#m was chan#ed' Terr& "e#an to operate from within that "elief' and he #a$e up on his dream. 3e #a$e up on himself. 5 hope &ou ne$er #i$e up on &our dreams. /e$er #i$e up on &ourself. But trul& the onl& wa& that ne#ati$e e$ents or words can affect us is if we a#ree to allow it to affect us. Be mindful of the subconscious agreements you make because those agreements tell your Soul what you want in life.

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