Cover Spread JUne 5/20/09 2:14 PM Page 1

She
She Magazine
Carolinas Hospital System
Receives Chest Pain Center Accreditation

IT’S RAINING MEN! • JUNE 2009

....it’s a woman thing!
M A G A Z I N E

Carolinas Hospital System is proud to be the first hospital in

northeastern South Carolina and one of only nine hospitals in
the state to receive accreditation for a Chest Pain Center.

www.shemagazine.com
Carolinas demonstrated its expertise and commitment to quality patient care by
meeting or exceeding a wide set of stringent criteria and completing on-site IT’S HERE -
evaluations by a review team from the Society of Chest Pain Centers. The OUR ANNUAL “MAN” ISSUE!
Society’s accreditation process insures centers meet or exceed quality-of-care
measures in acute cardiac medicine.
BEST DADS, LOVABLE HUSBANDS
We congratulate our Chest Pain Center team, including: Bill Cauthen, M.D.,
Director of Emergency Services, Lew Rowe, M.D., Cardiologist and Medical THE FORESTER, THE INVENTOR,
Director of Carolinas Cardiac Rehabilitation, and Brenda O’Connell, RN, BSN, THE MUSICIAN & MORE
Trauma/Chest Pain Center Coordinator, whose intensive work helped earn this
important accreditation.
THE SINGLE GUY

LIFESTYLE SWAP MAKEOVERS -

THE CONSERVATIVE LAWYER ROCKS OUT
Volume 7 • Issue 4

AND THE WORKING MAN SUITS UP

FATHERHOOD: THE ROLE OF A LIFETIME

805 Pamplico Highway • Florence, SC • (843) 674-5000 • www.carolinashospital.com
STAND BY YOUR MAN -
WHAT HE NEEDS NOW MORE THAN EVER IT’S RAINING MEN!
Glossy Page 2 5/19/09 3:23 PM Page 1

McLeod Orthopaedics

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Glossy Page 3 5/19/09 3:09 PM Page 1
Glossy Page 4 5/19/09 4:41 PM Page 1
5 5/20/09 1:46 PM Page 1

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6 5/21/09 11:19 AM Page 1
7 5/26/09 10:28 AM Page 1

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8 5/20/09 1:45 PM Page 1

Pee Dee Cardiology Associates, PA

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11 5/20/09 2:04 PM Page 1

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10 5/21/09 1:15 PM Page 1

There’s plenty to love about

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11 5/26/09 10:33 AM Page 1

Florence Wellness
& Weight-loss Center
under the direction of J. MARSHALL DENT, M.D., BARIATRICS PHYSICIAN,
BARIATRICS ASSISTANTS, JEAN DICKENS & PATRICIA POWELL AND
CERTIFIED PERSONAL TRAINER GEORGE MCELVEEN
NOW OFFERING FULL & MODIFIED FAST AS WELL AS OTHER PROGRAMS TAILORED TO YOUR INDIVIDUAL NEEDS

“ I’ve lost 45 POUNDS!

Karen Brigman Humphries tells her story.
HER STORY... At 237 pounds, health reasons motivated me to begin a weight-
loss program. My insulin resistance was high (22) and Dr. Dent put me on Metformin.
”
Plus, I needed to get the weight off to lessen the everyday pain in my back due to hav-
ing two back fusions, a pelvic fusion and an SI joint fusion.
I chose the Two-Week Fasting Plan initially and then I switched to the Modified
Plan. The only exercise I could do was slow-pace walking because of my my surgeries;
therefore, I thought it would be impossible to get the weight off without
exercise.
Then, Dr. Dent told me about this diet plan.
I love to cook and I cook for my family every night, so that’s the hardest part about
sticking to the plan. It’s very hard to prepare a meal and not be able to enjoy it with my
family.
After losing fifteen pounds, however, and my insulin level went from 22 to
10 (which is a normal limit and I was able to get off Metformin), I was motivated to
continue on. Also, getting the excess weight off is dramatically lessening the
everyday pain in my back.
I can shop now, which is one of the best things about losing the weight. I never
enjoyed shopping before. Gaining my confidence back and feeling better
about myself are great feelings.
My advice to others? Just keep on. It will be hard, but the health benefits
and the way you feel in the end will be worth it.
At the present time, I weigh 192 pounds; I’ve lost a total of 45 pounds.
photo by C. Wislon Studios

before Karen Brigman Humphries is a 45-year-old retired bank teller. She’s now a full-time homemaker to her wonderful hus-
band of 28 years, Heyward. She loves watching her 23-year-old son, Daniel (#56), race go karts. Spending time with
her family is what she enjoys doing the most.
after

J. Marshall Dent, M.D. is now certified by the American

Board of Bariatric Physicians, making him 1 of only
10 Board Certified Bariatrics Physicians in SC.

Complete Women’s Health Care

See Dr. Dent’s article

J. Marshall Dent, M.D.

Member of North American Menopausal Society • Member of American Bariatrics Physicians
on pg.48

410 South Coit Street • Florence • 665.5055

12 5/26/09 3:36 PM Page 1

It’s Raining Men!

Special Features
76 Austin Smetana

In Every Issue 78
80
Barry Frick
Benjamin Woods
14 Letter from the Editor 82 Brian Leonard
84 Charles Jeffcoat
16 She mail 86 Ed Kowalski

25 Style File 88 James Baker

90 Matt Watford
34 Beauty Buzz 92 Mike Weatherford
94-95 Donny Gerald
38 Wee She
Courtney Paige Driggers 96 Mark Jackson
98-99 Sam Mitchell
42 Shop Talk 100 Bobby Streett
Weaver Woodworking
102 Randall Graham

44 Sheroes 104 Jimmy Trussell

Adam & Carla Wright 106 Steve Mace
108 Brian Hyder
46-47 In His Own Words
110 Walt Hyman
Larry Miller
112-113 Phillip Atkinson & Hughes Page
51 The World According to
Starla Shelton

54 Chicks of the Month

Ascension Hospice of Florence Contributing Writers
18 Allie Atkinson 36 Paige Thomas
57 And She Cooks,Too! Men: God’s Way of Teaching Boys to Men
Patience to Women
60 Chick Lit 41 Ferebe Gasque
Sarah Marie Gooch 22 Sandra Honaker One Bad Apple Doesn’t Spoil
The Wall Between Us the Whole Bunch, Girls
64 Campus Chick 26 Jumana A. Swindler 118 Ouida K. Page, RN, LPC
Camille Cunningham The Perfect Rain Man Stand by Your Man

67 Wings for the Spirit 30-31 Minnemie Murphy 120-121 Cookie Cawthon
Sherry S. Page Life Among the Guys Finding HIM

32 Marti Miller
68 She’s Closet Forecast: Man-Drought

70 There She Goes

72 The Sir-Vey Medical Experts

48 J. Marshall Dent, III, MD 58 Alan M. Blaker, MD, FACC,
126 She Wants to Know Andropause: The Male FACP
Menopause Sleep Disorders &
132 Who’s That Girl? Cardiovascular Disease
Jaclyn R.Warden 52 McLeod Human Motion
Specialists 62 Lea Pritchard-Boone, PhD
McLeod Human Motion Fatherhood: The Role of a
Specialists are Bringing Lifetime
Movement to Life
13 5/21/09 1:03 PM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 13

She M e l ia
a Flowers Berry
Publisher/Editor
editor@shemagazine.com

Tuesday Taylor
General Manager
Advertising & Graphic Design
we are

tuesday@shemagazine.com

Dresden Tucker
Graphic Design
dresden@shemagazine.com

Leigh Clary Abdou

Production Manager
Advertising & Design
leigh@shemagazine.com

Heather Frick
Intern
hfrick@shemagazine.com

Ashley Rogers
Graphic Design
ashley@shemagazine.com

B e v e r l y K e l l y - Executive Assistant
R a y G a s q u e - Distribution Manager

She mail
E m a i l t o : e d i t o r @shemagazine.com
Mail to: 609 North Main Street • Marion, SC 29571
Call us: 843.423.2393 office line • 843.423.9837 fax line

This month’s cover

“It’s Raining Men” an acrylics by
Ashley Rogers was painted
especially for this issue.
Ashley is a graphic artist with
She Magazine. She and her
husband,William live in Marion.
They have a son, Brock and a
daughter, Lexi. This original
painting can be purchased by
contacting Ashley at 423.2393.
take us home
For a copy to be placed in your mailbox, send a check or money order

for $38 to the above address for a year's subscription.

She Magazine is published monthly and distributed at over 500 locations throughout the

Pee Dee. She Magazine reserves the right to refuse any advertisement or content we
deem inappropriate for the publication. Contributions are welcome and can be sent via

e-mail or snail mail. Please include name, address and contact number. You will be

contacted if we decide to print your submission. Content must be received by the 10th for

the following month's publication. Letters to the Editor are welcome; however, they may

require editing due to space limitations. The design, editorial and photo content in She is
copyright of She Magazine and may not be reproduced without written permission by the
publisher. She Magazine is a registered trademark.
14 5/26/09 10:49 AM Page 1

it’s raining from the editor

MEN JUNE 2009

As I sat at my kitchen table, peeling a basket of beautiful fresh peaches, She Magazine.” Woman: “Oh, I have to have a picture made?” She Mag: “Yes, we need
the first of the season, my heart was aching as I thought of my daddy. Later this month, a picture. Our readers like to actually see the person they’re reading about.” Woman:
we’ll celebrate Father’s Day – my first without my precious DaDa. The peaches made “Well, I really don’t want a picture made. I’m (we always get one of these) fat, having a
me think of him because, last summer, while he was sick and had little appetite, fresh bad hair day, look horrible in pictures, haven’t had a picture made since birth, etc.” She
peaches were one of the few things he enjoyed. I kept my eye out for every roadside Mag: “It’ll be okay, I promise. You can do this.” Woman: “Well, if I have to. I’d really
stand in search of the juiciest, ripest peaches – just for my DaDa. rather not. Is there anything I can do to avoid this?”
Many of my evenings were spent going to visit him, taking the day’s find for his This is how it goes with men: She Mag: “We need to schedule your picture for the
inspection. I can still so vividly see his gentle hands, now smooth but once so callused photo shoot.” Man: “Okay, what day?”
from a lifetime of hard work, holding and inspecting each piece of fruit as I waited for I kid you not. I’m not faulting you, ladies. I’m one of you. I hate having my picture
the verdict. My DaDa could tell how good a piece of produce was just by the texture made and I completely understand; however, sometimes, we can be difficult creatures.
and smell. After careful evaluation, he would look at me with such loving eyes and say, I have also witnessed this while raising my children. My two sons are a piece of cake
“Thank you, darling.” At that point, it didn’t matter what the verdict was; he was appre- compared to the complexities of my precious daughter. Again, let me give you an exam-
ciative that I came bearing fruit. Later, however, he would let me know if they were ple. My sons could care less about the clothes they wear for the most part. They have
good. Or, in his words, “not fit to eat.” never given me the first bit of anxiety over wardrobe issues. My Haley, however, has put
Having been raised on a farm, my daddy knew the difference in farm-grown me through enough stress to guarantee a future heart condition since she was two-
produce and that which was “raised in a hothouse and sprayed with chemicals.” He years-old. (Yes, I meant two; that was not a typo.) Her issues with clothes really did
longed for the days of all things farm-grown and farm-raised. In his later days, he begin at the age of
decided (perhaps, rightfully so) that much of the foods we eat “are so packed full of two. She went to
chemicals and hormones that we’re doing ourselves more harm than good to eat them.” bed one night as a
Holding the peaches in my hands, the juice ran down my arms as I cut away at sweet little angel,
the peelings. I knew my daddy would approve of these. The aroma was so sweet; I happy to wear what-
couldn’t help but stop to sample the goods as I went along. I thought about DaDa and ever her momma
what I would give to be able to take him some of these peaches. I long to see him and put on her. She
to hug him. Most of all, I long to have him hug me. I miss my daddy’s love so much. woke up the next
Surely, it’s still with me and always will be to a certain degree; however, I miss the tangi- morning with her
ble. I miss his voice. I miss seeing the love in his eyes. And the hugs. Oh, how I miss own idea of what
the hugs. was “purty” and
Making my way though the basket, I began thinking about that love – that bottom- never looked back.
less pit of love that he had for me and I realized that one of the reasons I miss it so much I could go on and
is that it made me feel so safe. Of all the wonderful things we can say about men, I on, but I cannot risk
believe the safety factor is perhaps the most awesome. There is something about the turning my own gen-
love of a man that carries with it the ability to make a woman feel safe. I like to feel der against me for
safe. I have never been into being scared. I hate scary movies. I cannot tolerate scary the sake of this one
rides. I wake from scary dreams and cannot go back to sleep. (You get the picture.) I issue dedicated to
love the warm, fuzzy cozies derived from feeling safe. I know now that as long as my celebrating and
DaDa was alive, I felt safe. Even in the last months of his life when he was frail and building up the other
weak, just knowing he was with me made me feel that I was taken care of, even though gender.
I was the one taking care of him. “IT’S RAINING
The love of a man is a powerful thing. God, in His Omniscience, knew that a MEN!” is the name
woman needed the love of a man and what that love would mean for her well-being of this year’s MAN
when he commanded men to love their wives as Christ loved the Church (Ephesians issue and it’s quite a “My two sons are a piece of cake
5:25). The love of a man directed at a woman, no matter what the relationship – father, befitting title if I compared to the complexities of
husband, son, friend, etc. – has tremendous potential where a woman is concerned. must say so myself. my dear daughter.”
I often wonder if the love of a man is so powerful because it’s not as easy to This year, we have
come by as is the love of a woman. Women, I think, are expected to love. We are born more men than ever
nurturers and, for most of us, it just comes naturally. Men, on the other hand (I believe), before. I got a little carried away and just couldn’t stop adding more men to the line-
often have to learn how to love and aren’t as comfortable with showing love as women. up. You wrote in to tell me about so many wonderful men; I only wish I had room for
There are, of course, exceptions to this opinion and my daddy was one of them. That more. Along with dads and husbands, we also selected a few men who love what they
man reeked of love like a wino reeks of spirits. Love was in his speech and his actions. do and are quite good at it (so their wives and friends told us) – “The Designer,” “The
So, I miss him. I will miss him this summer and with each piece of summer’s Chef,” “The Carpenter,” “The Musician” and “The Forester” (just to name a few). For
harvest I partake of, I will think of him. I will think of him on Father’s Day and on his the ANNUAL MALE MAKOVERS, we did something really different and quite fun; the
birthday in July and every day that I spend on this earth without him. conservative man and the working guy trade places with a lifestyle swap makeover. You’ll
This issue is the much-anticipated ANNUAL MAN ISSUE. You’ve let us know surely want to share this issue with the men in your life once you are done. Or, better
that this is one of your favorite issues and, I must say, it is one of mine, as well. It’s cer- yet, this month is all about him. Be a dear and let him go first.
tainly the funniest issue we publish all year and much less stressful to produce than any Now, back to where I began – the peaches. I was peeling them for the absolute best
other issue. After years of putting together the ANNUAL MAN ISSUE, I think I’ve fig- dessert ever! It’s called Peach Delight (although it should be called Peach Heaven) and
ured out why – men are just easier to work with than women. I share it with you in “AND SHE COOKS,TOO!” I made the first of the season for my
Now, please don’t hate me, friends, for speaking what I believe to be the truth. sweet mother’s birthday. Try it and let me know what your family thinks about it.
I’m still on your side and can usually find a few things to substantiate the fact that men Okay, ladies, get out your umbrellas; “IT’S RAINING MEN!” And like the song says,
just do not get it most of the time. However, I must give credit where credit is due. it’s time to “get absolutely soaking wet!”
Let me give you an example.When scheduling the pictures for any given photo Enjoy the men in your life and in this issue . . . but, it’s still a woman thing.
shoot, most often the conversation with the woman being featured will go something
like this: She Mag: “We need to schedule your photo shoot for your story in Melia Flowers Berry
15 5/21/09 11:34 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 15

Our CARE Team

(Compassionate And Reliable Experts)
includes:
• Physician
• Licensed Master of Social Work
• Registered Nurse
• Volunteers
• Chaplain
• And many others
• Certified Nursing Assistant

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We bring to our patients and their families

the same personal attention and care
we would for our own families.

1303 W. EVANS S
FLORENCE, SC
(843) 468-9700
7142 WOODROW ST. • IRMO, SC • (803) 796-9296
16 5/21/09 12:40 PM Page 1
Dear She,
Thank you so much for
asking me to be featured in
May’s “The World According
to.” I’ve received several
phone calls, so I can attest to
the fact that folks do read
She Magazine – even men!
Peggy McLean, Florence
Dear She,
I really enjoyed reading She’s May issue
and, because of it, I am reminded of what is really
important. After reading the Editor’s Letter in the
May issue (“The Truth About Motherhood”) writ-
ten by Melia Berry, I was in tears.
My husband, Shane, and I have a two-year-
old and I never knew what being a mother meant
until he came along. Melia’s thoughts make me
remember what I have always known; time waits
on no one. I have often neglected my housework
to spend time with Keeton and sometimes I think
I will never get it all done. I am reminded that all
the other stuff can wait; he needs me now and
there will be plenty of time for everything else
when he no longer wants my attention.
Kathy G. Cribbs, Mullins
Send an E-MAIL to editor@shemagazine.com
or MAIL us at 609 N. Main St., Marion, SC 29571
Dear
She mail
She,
I am so impressed with the print quality of
She Magazine. I work in boating for my day job and we send ads to nation-
al boating magazines. Even though they are gloss pages, the paper quality and print
quality for some of them is nowhere near the quality and clarity that I see in She.
That being the case, I was really excited when Linda Wilson asked me to design ads
for placement in She! It’s so much more exciting when you know the quality is
going to be great.
Having a good job is one thing, but it’s quite another when you’re doing
something that makes you feel good and allows you to have fun while you’re doing
it. Even though I know you all work very hard, She Magazine is a reflection that
you obviously have a lot of fun, too!
Thanks again and I look forward to working with you,
Debbie Packer, Florence
Dear She,
I’m writing in hope that I can get a copy of the October 2008
issue of She Magazine that was published in honor of Breast Cancer
Month. My friend is fighting breast cancer and I’d love to give her that
copy so she could be encouraged as she is taking chemo treatments. I
know it would be uplifting to her – especially the survivor stories.
Thank you for She Magazine and for the way Christ is glorified
in it. I always get excited when I see a new issue come out. May God
bless your work for Him!
Libby Villescas, Florence
Dear She,
I always read She Magazine and I find it enjoyable. The thing I enjoy
most about She is reading the articles about local women from the
Pee Dee area. The articles are inspirational and interesting. I also like
looking at the fashion trends because they are gorgeous and it keeps
me informed about the latest styles.
She Magazine is great! Thumbs up to everyone for their hard work!
Sincerely,
Shemel J.Thomas,
Hartsville
17 5/21/09 1:51 PM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 17

18 5/25/09 11:46 AM Page 1

Men:
God’s Way of Teaching
Patience to Women
by Allie Atkinson

Men are a complete and total mystery to me. However, I do have to

admit they fascinate me to a certain extent. When I’m around a group of men, I tend
to sit back and be a casual observer. I watch them in much the same way Jane Goodall
watched her ape friends in the jungle. I feel a certain kinship to the creatures, but I real-
ly am constantly aware of how very different they are from me at the same time.
For example, in celebration of the last day of class for my yearbook students,
we held a party. Prior to the actual day, I gave an invitation to each student to insure
that they would actually be in attendance for a class they’re supposed to be in anyway.
On each note, I listed an item that I wanted that student to bring. The girls were given
items such as cupcakes and napkins and plates. The boys were assigned ice, M&Ms,
Skittles and two-liter drinks – specific items that we could actually get by without if they
“forgot.” I knew the party would be important to the girls and that they would, there-
fore, remember. We aren’t always so lucky when it comes to men.
What is important to men? Based upon my extensive observations, sports are
important to men. Now, don’t get me wrong. I often enjoy sporting events as much as
men; however, I’m not obsessed with sports. Many men are. They play sports. They
watch sports on television. They watch reruns of sporting events. They watch recaps
of the games on ESPN. Then, there are
fantasy sports (like Fantasy
Football). What the heck is that,
anyway? Not only are there
real sports teams to fol-
low all the time, now
our men can also
become an imagi-
nary commission-
er or coach and
create imaginary
teams that
compete in
imaginary
games and
earn points.
The team with the most points at the end of the season wins. Usually they
receive trophies and money. Don’t think these teams are really important to your hus-
band? Go to a church marriage retreat for a weekend during football season. For the
past two years, my husband has gone to the one public computer on Sunday morning
before the closing service in order to “tweak” his lineup.
Know what else is important to men? Food. I cannot tell you how tired I am
of being asked what we’re having for supper before I even get a chance to put a bite of
breakfast in my mouth. I mean, seriously! How quickly are they going to starve to
death? Is it possible that a man could starve to death after a mere three hours with-
out food? You know they have a snack in between each and every meal! The only thing
that irritates me more is when you tell them what you’re going to prepare and then
they tell you they had that for lunch or that they are really in the mood for something
else. What would they do if they were single? Who would prepare what they eat? Who
would clean up the kitchen afterwards? My husband is a great guy, but he uses twice
as many dishes to prepare a meal than I do. And, he seems to be incapable of timing it
to where everything is ready at the same time. Every meal would have to be served in
courses as they get done.
Men relate completely differently than us women, too. We all know that
though, right? Try to have a conversation with one and see how it works. First of all,
men seem to be pretty poor listeners due to what we usually refer to as “selective
hearing.” And if they are listening, they don’t “hear” us the way our girlfriends do. Our
girlfriends coddle us and commiserate over our problem or misery. Men, on the other
hand, go directly into Bob-Vila mode. They want to “fix” it. They give advice or tell us
how we should have handled a given situation. Women usually don’t normally respond
well to that (in case you weren’t already aware of that).
One of the funniest book and seminar series I have seen on this very topic is
Men Are Like Waffles – Women Are Like Spaghetti by Pam and Bill Farrel, Christian writ-
ers who attempt to explain the fundamental differences in the two sexes.
In a nutshell, the Farrels say that men and women’s brains function very differ-
ently. Men’s brains are more compartmentalized (like the individual boxes in a waffle).
Men can only occupy one box at a time. If they’re watching sports, their entire self is
immersed in that single activity. If you try and talk to them about anything during this
period of time, they’ll not be able to focus on you or what it is you’re saying unless it’s
directly related to sports. They cannot feasibly multitask. They have to stay in their cur-
rent box. Some boxes are larger than others and they spend more time in some than
others. They can change boxes, but it generally involves a conscious transition. It’s not
an immediate flip of a switch.
Women’s brains, on the other hand, are associated with spaghetti noodles.
There is no separation between individual ideas or tasks for women. All of our
“noodles” touch. They overlap and cross other thoughts and feelings and ideas.
We’re great at multitasking because everything is related in a woman’s mind. “I’m
hungry; I think I’ll have a bowl of cereal. We’re running low on milk, so I need to
run by the market. Need to get laundry detergent, too. I need to pick up my
dress at the cleaners. Next door to the cleaners is the pharmacy. Need to get
some vitamins for Susie. Mom’s birthday is the 25th and I need to get a card in
the mail to her. Need stamps. I’d really like to take the kids to D.C. this sum-
mer. Do I have the vacation days? How about the money? Oh yeah, bring
the check for the veterinarian so I can drop it off. What was I doing, again?”
So, yes, the evidence is out there and, yes, we are very different from each
other. But, God knows best. He made Adam a “helper suitable for him” – not
like him. We’re meant to complement one another. Where one is weak, the
other is strong. Where one is singularly-focused, the other can multitask. We’re
the perfect combination, like chocolate and peanut butter. And, while we may
not always understand one another, we should always remember that it’s this
way for a reason.
Besides, God is always trying to teach us patience. Maybe men are
His way of teaching it to women.

Allie Atkinson is a French teacher at Marion High School.

She lives in Marion with her husband, Philip, and daughter, Abbie.
19 5/21/09 11:21 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 19

Campers have a great week

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22 5/25/09 11:47 AM Page 1

THE WALL
BETWEEN “This wall
keeps me
from
US by Sandra Honaker
writing
about him,
A lthough each June issue of She Magazine is dedicated to fathers, I have always tried to come up with
a way to avoid writing about mine, and that is not because I don’t love my father or I had a bad father. There is this
wall between my father and me, and I put the wall there, so I can’t blame him for it. This wall keeps me from writ-
but this
June I’m
ing about him, but this June I’m going to try to breach it.
Right from the start I need you to know I have a great father. He takes care of everybody. He married my
mother one month before her father died, and he stepped up to the plate and helped take care of her mother and
her four sisters, giving them away in their own marriages. When crises arose in the family, he was always there, help-
going
ing out mom’s sisters and their children whenever he could. When his Aunt Rene was stricken with Alzheimer’s, he
drove the seven hour round trip to Gaffney often twice a week to help take care of her, and he did this for years.
to try to
He did the same for his mother after his father passed away.
breach it.
”
He teaches Sunday school at his church, and I can’t really remember a time before he was a deacon—it
seems he always was. He was a good businessman before he retired, and he was my first real employer, letting me
(maybe “letting” is not exactly the right verb, but we’ll use it here) help with inventory and stock and delivery. He
taught me a lot about retail and about the magic of capitalism, where all you have to do is treat people with respect
and give them a good product and they give you money. A former accountant, he taught me about the importance
of keeping an eye on my money and watching my expenses and not spending everything I had the moment I had it.
When I was in the wrong, he would let me know. When I would have a less than gifted teacher in school
he would still say it was my responsibility to learn from her, regardless. He wouldn’t let me off the hook about miss-
ing school or not fulfilling my responsibilities or not living up to my possibilities. His favorite poet is Robert Service,
and Dad often quotes the line from Service’s poem “The Cremation of Sam McGee” that “A promise made is a debt
unpaid.” He taught me to keep my word and to be of use in this world.
So as good as my father was, I didn’t have the relationship with my father that many writers in this maga-
zine had with their fathers. I was never, ever a Daddy’s Girl, for example. Although I never doubted that he loved
me, I was always worried that I was too weird for him to really approve of me. Sometimes I saw a puzzled look on
his face, as if he wasn’t quite sure I belonged to him. Perhaps it is only the fault of my limited perspective, but I
always felt that my sisters each had a parent that they were particularly close to, and then there was me, the lit-
eral fifth wheel. Lisa was daddy’s girl, and Rankin was mom’s, but for many years I suspected that the joke my
sisters often repeated to me, that I was adopted, was true, because I didn’t fit. My tastes were too strange,
my clothing inappropriate (I had cleanliness issues), and my daydreams too intense (I wrote my own
episodes to TV shows, not realizing until years later that I was merely anticipating the genre of fan fic-
tion). In later years my lack of faith separated me from my family, as well as my politics. Although I’ve
come back to faith, my politics are still out of step. I am the only non-republican in my family, only once
voting for a republican candidate for president. Even as I write this I’m worried it will embarrass my
dad, but it is what it is, for, like Popeye, I am what I am.
It was this awareness of difference that led me to build my wall, and I must reiterate that I built
it, not him. He never ostracized me for my beliefs or my tastes, although I took my fair share of teas-
ing. I was worried that if he knew the deepest desires of my heart he would be disappointed, and that
disappointment would be hardest to bear if it came from my father. So I became secretive. I hardly ever
let him meet my boyfriends, for example, because I knew he wouldn’t like them. Although he has accept-
ed my husband into our family, my dad complained to me once before my wedding that he hardly knew
Pat, and I have to admit my dad was right. I didn’t give him a chance to know Pat because I didn’t want
him to not approve of the man that I knew I loved.
Now that I have a daughter of my own who is a lot like me, I know the frustration my father
must have felt. My daughter hides her thoughts from me and pulls away from me as much as I did
from him, and I suspect she thinks I’m disappointed in her, but she is wrong. Because of her, I’m
sure now I was wrong about my father, but the wall is still in place.
The point of this article is to tell my dad, firmly and in public (because to say this to
him privately would exhibit far more emotion than I am comfortable showing), that I do love
and admire him, and wouldn’t have wanted anyone else for my father. Some of the best parts
of my psyche are the parts I inherited from him (although the whole short-temper thing
could have been omitted). I am proud to be his daughter.
Happy Father’s Day, Bob.

Sandra Honaker lives in Marion with her husband Pat and her daughters Morgan and Alex.
Her father is Bobby Dean Sanders of Florence, SC.
22 5/25/09 11:47 AM Page 2
23 5/21/09 11:25 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 23

Custom Outdoor Kitchens

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24-25 5/26/09 4:58 PM Page 1

We Love You, Dad

Morgan
and Dad,
Dan
Macaira and Dad,
Kevin

Cynthia and Dad,

Ned

“The just man walketh in his integrity:

his children are blessed after him.”
Proverbs 20:7 KJV
24-25 5/26/09 4:59 PM Page 2

Happy Father’s Day!

Sarah and Dad, Larry

Lane and Dad,

Gene

Photos by Collin M. Smith

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26 5/26/09 8:30 PM Page 1

The Perfect Rain Man

By Jumana A. Swindler

When Melia, the publisher of this awesome magazine, home cooked meal is the gift of time and energy spent to prepare it.
And his arms, well those are extremely vital considerations in finding the per-
reminded us that this month's theme for She is "It's Raining
fect man. They should be strong enough to help haul in groceries or set up the fre-
Men," I of course was the first to scream out, "Where?!"
quent beach umbrellas and hoist future grandchildren on his shoulders, but be comfort-
Some how, that particular Weather Channel report never makes it to me in
able enough for me to wrap around during a boring social event for work.
time to catch those showers. Just once I would like to show up to one of those down-
His shoulders must be broad, prepared to carry the burden of our families
pours without an umbrella! And, if possible, I would like to pick just the right manly mol-
many dramas or the supply-filled backpacks for future hikes in Alaska or trekking
ecules falling from the sky - even if there is only a small drop of dudes from which to
through adventures on RV trips cross country.
choose.
The perfect man has to have character. Both sides of his face should say the
The perfect Man in my opinion would arrive in a sudden, but gentle summer
same thing and fibbing is out of the question, even when he forgets that it's a special
drizzle, without the clap of thunder or spectacle of lightning. He would be Humble,
occasion or that he invited his mother to spend the week of summer vacation.
Hearty, Happy and Handsome. (The fourth H would be nice in the selection, but it's not
The perfect man displays consistency. What you see at work or play, is that
required.) Just what will he look like?
same easy going personality at home. He understands how to operate more than heavy
Well, he should be tall enough to appear higher than me in photographs (as
machinery and yard tools, a knowledge that also extends to special equipment like the
opposed to poor Emma Thompson who had to shed her shoes in order to balance out
dishwasher or clothes dryer.
Dustin Hoffman in the movie, "Last Chance Harvey.") and wide enough to make me
My perfect man believes in his Christian commitments, and attends church
look petite.Width in the relationship is crucial to a food fan like me.
because of his need for worship, not because it is a good networking opportunity or
He may sport any eye color, no preference, but his peepers must be big
better for his image.
enough to shed tears of joy as well as overflow with emotion if grief requires it. In my
His vocation provides him with the right P. and M. - purpose and meaning, not
opinion, real men do cry, demonstrate emotion when the moment calls for it and tag
power or money.What he does is not for a living but for a loving, mindful of his prior-
along to an occasional chick flick when asked by their wives.
ities - Faith, Family, Friends and Fun in balance.
The perfect man's lips are not just there for the pucker factor -- they should
So, if it's really raining men, hand me some galoshes and point me in the right
be large enough to be heard acknowledging his Christian faith in public or when we
direction!
pray together in private. They should be eager to curl into a smile, when whispering
Happy Summer!!!
words of encouragement to others as often as appropriate. His expression, trustwor-
thy and true, exudes the confidence to compliment the chef, even when my meatloaf is 1 John 4:11
mediocre -- because the perfect man recognizes that the important thing to savor at a

Jumana A. Swindler, a resident of Florence, is the Director of Marketing and Public Relations for McLeod Health. Her personal favorite pastimes, reflected in her writings,
27 5/26/09 3:05 PM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 27

Where Happily ever after begins.

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28 5/25/09 12:28 PM Page 1

Mark your calendar for She Saturday 2009!

e m s
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29 5/26/09 10:44 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 29

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30-31 5/26/09 9:36 AM Page 1

Life Among the Guys by Minnemie Murphy

Devan, Pieter, Minnemie, Scott, Martin and Neels Murphy

F Fifteen years ago, as a physical therapy student at the University of Pretoria in

South Africa, I had no idea, dream or inclination towards being an all-boy mom in a dif-
ferent country, culture and language. It was “the-thing-to-do” among graduates of the
day to pursue a quick one-year-working adventure to another country. So, in 1995, I
ventured to the USA; but, my one-year plan got jumbled. I’m still here!
After living in Florence several years and working as a Physical Therapist in
Darlington, I was introduced to Scott Murphy in 1998. Numerous mutual friends
thought we were “just perfect for each other,” but neither one of us were impressed –
Yes, they’re all boys – four of them.
But, don’t pity me – it’s great!

Four is a crew
and sometimes I do
forget a name or two.
But they quickly re-direct
me in order to connect
me with the one I really need,
at least not at first. It is a worthy story and powerful demonstration of God’s grace, but “Surely she means not me,
I’ll keep it short. After a disastrous initial courtship (I thought we were dating, but he but one of the other three!”
never would admit to such a term!), we broke up and entered what we now (with a
chuckle) refer to as “The Dark Ages” – one and a half years of enmity. They’re busy; it’s true,

I
But, grace prevailed and after a remarkable reconciliation in 2000, we entered destructive, too (!)
the journey of marriage on March 10, 2001. Oh and what a journey! In Michael Card’s and they race from first light till night.
words,“There is a joy in the journey!” (There are frustrations, too, but more about that Thus our dwelling might
later.) not be a pretty sight.
Some of the greatest joys we have walked through together have undoubtedly But, don’t pity me – it’s great!
been the births of each of our sons. We started talking about children while in pre-mar-
They’re innovative and carefree
ital counseling. We hoped for four li’l Murphys of whatever size, shape or gender the
as they test the laws of gravity
Lord would see fit to provide. At that point, I personally thought two boys and two girls from the topmost part of any tree.
would be just marvelous. Once I held our firstborn, though, I realized that the Lord gives They make sure for every action
not “a gender,” but a person, uniquely created in His image, displaying different facets of to elicit a (my) reaction.
His beauty, each demanding a different part of my being to be sanctified so I may taste (I suspect they enjoy it just a fraction.)
deeper of the “Heavenly Bread.” But, don’t pity me – it’s great!
We didn’t desire to know the gender with any of my pregnancies. (Not know-
ing was a great incentive to help me – literally – push through labor in order to find out.) Oh, they love to make noise
When I was pregnant with number four, we (I, especially) were a little concerned that a with body (:-o) and/or voice.
girl might actually pop out. I had come to enjoy the boys so much, I just didn’t think I Jericho’s walls would not stand
could handle being a girl-mom! My anxiety was unnecessary because our home now against such a strident band.
But, don’t pity me – it’s great!
vibrates with the lives of four little men – Devan (6), Neels (4), Pieter (2) and Martin (1).
Though the odds may seem against me in this all-male-run home, I am actually
There’s been a peanut up a nose,
The Queen. No, they don’t exactly acknowledge my self-appointed status, but for the another favors sucking his (dirty) toes,
most part I feel royal with my clan around me. Although four is not that great a num- Number two always has one missing shoe,
ber, four boys seem to be a great subject of interest and concern to some genuinely and why is the floor covered with . . .glue?
compassionate people we meet when the boys and I venture into stores. We’ve come Sighhhh!
to expect and smile at comments of disbelief or pity. “All boys?! Four of them?! No But, when it’s all out, found and cleaned-up,
girl?” With a shake of the head, they walk away muttering,“Lord, have mercy” or some- I live to tell.
thing similar, probably secretly wondering what I did to deserve all this. Oh, how I wish And it returns to great!
I had time to tell them just how I really feel about my tribe.
Minnemie Murphy (a native of South Africa) and her husband, Scott, and their four boys live in Florence.
30-31 5/26/09 9:37 AM Page 2

The books that we read

are to educate me
about tractors and trailers
and knuckle boom loaders,
band saws and routers,
jigsaws and grinders.
Though a bit of a bore,
at least I now know more,
like the fact that helicopter propellers
move like a bunch of tree fellers.
No? Oh, at any rate,
don’t pity me, it’s great!

The gifts they bring

are rather interesting:
dead flies, dried worms and rocks,
random hugs, flowering weeds, dirty socks.
Oh, don’t pity me.
You have to admit – it’s great!

Little boys smell . . .

well . . . like outside.
In that they take some pride,
but then they don’t think
that I stink
with no shower four days straight.
So, don’t pity me – its’ great!

Now, there is the Loo issue.

If you really want to shed some sympathy,
here is the place to feel sorry for me.
Little drops are everywhere,
the aim is not always (ever) quite there.
kcotton.massagetherapy.com
I step in the bathroom door,
on the rim and on the floor,
a mess meets my sight,
my nose says it’s not right.
I get uptight.
I just cleaned it last night!
Yes, pity me – this dilemma is great. 3203 W Palmetto St # L • Florence • (843) 667-3636
But . . .
My clothes are wrinkled and so is my face,
yet they view me through a lens of grace.
For though my hair is a mighty mess,
they declare nonetheless
that I’m beautiful as can be.
So, don’t pity me – it’s great!

There’re four of them, and, yes, all boys.

But, don’t pity me – they’re great!
The only thing I’d maybe like more
is if instead of four . . .
we had eight!

I I’ll be a big fat fraud if I don’t acknowledge that some days are terrible, hor-
rible, not good and very hard. Though one boy by himself typically provides for an
eventful life, danger is looming in numbers. And we have numbers. Think me not dis-
respectful if I compare them to a pack of dogs. In an all-boy home, life becomes more
exaggerated, their actions more intense, their ability to destroy inflated, their noises
louder, their odors stronger(!), the risks they take greater.
But, for all the chaos, commotion and craziness, I declare they are incredibly
low maintenance! Conflicts are easily resolved, grievances quickly forgotten, forgive-
ness authentically and rapidly bestowed. They entertain themselves through cama-
raderie with each other – and whatever that may lead to. On a typical day, it includes
finding and utilizing treasures such as bugs, bricks, rubber bands, ropes, rocks, rusty
nails, pipes, planks, dirt, dry leaves, sticks and babobies. (Ba . . . what?) I don’t know.
I don’t get it either, but they know and find great delight in hunting it! I don’t think it
exists anywhere but in their minds and vocabulary; but, to be sure, it is.
There is also a different kind of chaos and confusion characterizing our
home, but it has nothing to do with the disproportionate amount of men in the
house. It’s because ours is a bilingual dwelling. The boys and I speak Afrikaans to each
other, while they speak English to Scott. I’m sure our kitchen falls just short of resem-
bling the cacophony heard at a cosmopolitan food market. Scott understands only a
little Afrikaans, but somehow he manages to bask in the inevitable resulting disorder.
He’s great! I marvel in his gracious acceptance and willingness to learn this different
language that sometimes reigns in our house.
Scott’s posture proclaims that there is joy in learning from that which is alien. With Two Locations To Serve You:
And, some days, I’m convinced that this peculiar male species occupying my house 501 S. Irby St. Florence, SC
qualify as alien(s). My female understanding finds them (on occasion) to be very Marion County Medical Complex
Hwy 76 Marion, SC (Tuesday’s only)
strange and unfamiliar.
Then again, my official status on legal documents is indeed – Resident Alien.
Thus I guess I have arrived. I love my extraterrestrial life!
126 5/21/09 12:45 PM Page 1
Forecast:
MAN-DROUGHT
F rom where I’m sitting (and watching and waiting),
the sky is not exactly pouring out men all over the place.
It’s not even drizzling over here on Oliver Street -nary a
shower or even a promise of one. No happy little man
puddle to jump in with both feet.At last check, there was
a big fat zero chance of rain in the man forecast.
The husband of 25 years will be missed for 3
whole years this month.The daddy left here shortly after
the husband, with nearly 90 years of living behind him.
The son is off “soldiering” his responsibilities and, hope-
fully, learning to survive them (Ft. Benning to Ft. Drum to
Afghanistan). Yep, it’s rather a bit of a man drought for
this old Marion maid (it’s not at all nice to snicker at the
choice of phrase– and I know exactly who you are, ladies
and gentlemen).
Certainly there are men all around, every-
where. Just look at the pages of this magazine and on the
streets where we live and work and play and worship.
Unfortunately, they seem to all have a bad case of the
too’s - as in too young, too old, too fussy, too fierce, too
humorless, too dull, too weird, and my personal favorite,
too married.
When you haven’t dated in a very, very long
time, you begin to wonder if it’s really even worth the
effort anymore. But, attempting eternal optimism, I’ve
embarked on a widow’s make-over, thanks to the enthu-
siasms of my new southern friends. I now wear make-up,
even to aerobics class (need the application practice?). I
sport bigger earrings and a new bra (an uplifting experi-
ence, all by itself) and a more up-to-date hairstyle that
takes me a whole lot longer to configure than my cher-
ished old pal, the ponytail. For what it’s worth, I’m very
busy working out the many kinks in the physical appear-
ance department (as in, uh-oh, better get Maaco).
For added inspiration, I decided to troll about
for more man information and searched the Internet
(no, not the dating sites – I may be slightly concerned
about this drought, but I’m not desperate …yet). Lo and
behold, I tripped upon a website called The Art of
Manliness. It offered great tidbits for men on how to
remain or become a real one – complete with a
daily email tip service entitled “The Toilet Paper
– Daily News for the Thinking Man”. Maybe if
I can grasp some better understanding of
them, I might be able to actually locate
another real one again? As luck would
have it, I hit pay dirt.
One of the website articles was
about Benjamin Franklin’s 13 Virtues and
how they remain words to live by for
manly men. Evidently, when he was a
young man of about 20, Franklin decided
to draft his plan for living. His guiding
light was Philippians 4:8. These
virtues pretty much describe the
man of my dreams.Who knew that
the man who pushed for the
Marti Miller continues to hope happily in
the reality of her Marion dreams. If you
care to share thoughts on this or any
subject, please send them to
martimiller@roadrunner.com
by Marti Miller
turkey to be our national bird would come up with such
an eagle-eyed view of what is so beautifully attractive?
Here they are, along with his brief descriptions:
Temperance: Eat not to dullness and drink not to eleva-
tion.
Silence: Speak not but what may benefit others or your-
self. Avoid trifling conversation.
Order: Let all your things have their places. Let each part
of your business have its time.
Resolution: Resolve to perform what you ought. Perform
without fail what you resolve.
Frugality: Make no expense but to do good to others or
yourself: i.e.Waste nothing.
Industry: Lose no time. Be always employed in something
useful. Cut off all unnecessary actions.
Sincerity: Use no hurtful deceit. Think innocently and
justly; and, if you speak, speak accordingly.
Justice: Wrong none, by doing injuries or omitting the
benefits that are your duty.
Moderation:Avoid extremes. Forebear resenting injuries
so much as you think they deserve.
Cleanliness: Tolerate no uncleanness in body, clothes or
habitation.
Chastity: Rarely use venery but for health or offspring;
Never to dullness, weakness, or the injury of your own
or another's peace or reputation.
Tranquility: Be not disturbed at trifles, or at accidents
common or unavoidable.
Humility: Imitate Jesus and Socrates.
So, here’s the plan:Wait for God to send him my
way – the one that practices the 13 virtues penned by
Benjamin Franklin, with divine inspiration from
Philippians 4:8. Meanwhile, I’ll practice them myself, with
patience and perspective, while I’m waiting for that new
man of my dreams to show up on my doorstep. (Did I
mention that one of my favorite pastimes is gazing out
the front window, watching for his arrival? I’m not kid-
ding.Yes, it’s sad, yet hopeful?). If it’s not too much to ask,
I’d also like him to have a moustache, chest hair and
stand about 6 feet tall and weigh lots more than
me. He’ll be comfortable in jeans and t-
shirt or in suit and tie.And he’ll know how
to fix things.
Oh, who am I kidding? Please, Lord,
just let him stand upright and breathe fairly reg-
ularly. And, if one never comes my way again, at least I’ll
remember with joy the one I had (the one I failed to
always appreciate adequately while he was here). I’ll be
grateful for the memory and content in the present,
knowing what eternity holds. Meanwhile, I’ll be opti-
mistic and keep the umbrella handy. Either that or I’ll just
keep rewinding the bathtub scene from The Bridges of
Madison County. Seriously. It adds a whole new meaning
to the phrase: “Go ahead; make my day.”
33 5/21/09 4:11 PM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 33

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34 5/25/09 11:54 AM Page 1

Dear She,
I have a question for “Beauty Buzz.” Actually, it’s more for my hus-
band than myself. He has larger breasts than normal for a man. He’s not
that much overweight and never has been; this problem has plagued him
since his early teens. I understand there is a common (though probably
not medical) term for this – “man boobs.” With the resources you have
in the medical field, I’m hoping you can tell me what his options might be.
- An avid reader of She and “Beauty Buzz”
(I’m withholding my name because my husband would kill me for asking.)
Dear Reader,
Thanks for asking the question. You have perfect timing! Since this is our annual issue
dedicated to men, I think it’s a timely and important subject to investigate for our male readers
and for those who love them. I asked Dr. Edward O’Dell with Genesis Cosmetic Laser Center
to answer your question. I hope you find it helpful. - Melia Flowers Berry, Editor

Liposuction: It’s Not Just for the Ladies

by Edward O’Dell, MD
with
Genesis Cosmetic Laser Center
Hey, guys! You got that “spare tire” or maybe the “man boobs” that you
have been lugging around for years? That beer gut just won’t go away. You’re tired
of the 2X T-shirts just because your gut is too big but the rest of you is okay. Dieting
and working out has helped shape up the arms and legs, but that six-pack just ain’t
getting there. Maybe it’s time for a little lipo tune-up.
Liposuction has been around for several years. In the past fifteen years,
however, it has become more safe and effective with the advent of Tumescent
Liposuction. The technique has mostly been marketed to women as they are the
largest consumer of cosmetic procedures and products. The good news is that you
don’t have to be left on the curb with the big gut or double chin while your lady is
looking foxy. Liposuction can help you, too.
There are several areas that are unique to men with the liposuction. The
largest area is probably the “spare tire” that consists of the upper and lower
abdomen and the flank or “love handles.” Many men are able to rid themselves of
these unsightly areas, but many men may not –
despite multiple gym sessions.
With Awake Tumescent Liposuction,
these problems can be solved with great satis-
faction requiring a minimum of downtime. The
tumescent technique does not require any gen-
eral anesthesia or large incisions and is done
while you are awake and conversant. After tak-
BEFORE ing a small amount of a sedative by mouth, the
abdomen/love handle area is prepped with an
antimicrobial solution and small areas are
numbed. Through these numbed areas, small
puncture holes are made. A
solution of Lidocaine (a numb-
ing agent) in saline along with
Epinephrine (an anti-bleeding
agent) is infused under the skin
until the whole area is infiltrated
and becomes numb. We next
use either laser or ultrasonic
Vaser to break down the fat in
the area and begin the skin
tightening process. This is fol-
lowed by the suctioning process
in which most of the abdominal fat is removed. This is all done through a puncture
hole just millimeters in size. An abdominal binder or a tight fitting garment is then
applied and you go home. We recommend wearing the garment for about a week
if possible – or longer if you need to. Downtime? Just a few days.
Another problem area for men is the chest region where gynecomastia or
“man boobs” are present. Many men are plagued with this problem from childhood.
Some men are left with this condition after losing a lot of weight, despite working
out. The technique again involves making tiny puncture holes in the chest and armpit
area, infusing the tumescent solution and suctioning out the problem fat. A special
elastic vest is then fitted for you to wear for several days. The garment helps to pre-
vent bleeding and also begins the healing process for tighter skin. You can remove
the garment to shower and then put it back on under your shirt. Many men are
back at work in a day or so with the garment hidden under their clothes so no one
has to know.
Guys, are you tired of the double chin? Liposuction can help you with this,
too. The chin area is also another area that sometimes does not retract as you lose
weight, so you are left with a great body but a fat neck. We like to refer to chin
tightening as the “weekend chin lift.” The procedure can be performed on a
Thursday or Friday, a chin binder is worn for forty-eight hours (except for showers
and eating) and you are back at church or work in two days. I use a small two-mil-
limeter slit incision under the chin where it is not seen after healing. Most patients
see results within a week or two. However, I always encourage the patients that
maximum results should not be expected for a minimum of at least three months –
no matter what area is done.
Outside the liposuction area, many men are turning to Fraxel Laser
Treatments and Botox to achieve a better look. How many of you have old acne
scarring or sun-damaged skin that is growing worse with aging? With the Fraxel
Laser Treatments, much of the scarring can be smoothed and the fine wrinkles of
sun damage and aging can be erased.
Hey, no need to let the ladies have all the youthful appearances; this is something for
men, too. Don’t wimp out guys. Admit it.You would like to look younger and slim-
mer, too.
At Genesis Cosmetic Laser Center, we have all the liposuction modalities
that can achieve your desired result. In addition, we offer other skin treatments such
as Fraxel, Botox, cosmetic fillers and hydrofacial treatments that can help turn back
the clock on your skin.
Don’t be afraid, boys. Your wives and girlfriends have done this for years.
Come on! You know you want it! Give us a call!

AFTER Genesis Cosmetic Laser Center is located in Florence at

1273 Celebration Boulevard. Call 843-669-2220 for a
no-obligation consultation. Visit us on the web at
www.GenesisCosmeticLaserCenter.com.

E-mail your beauty questions or suggestions for a topic that you would like
to know more about to editor@shemagazine.com. Include “Beauty Buzz” as the subject.
35 5/26/09 2:49 PM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 35

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36 5/21/09 12:48 PM Page 1

Boys to MEN by Paige Thomas

It’s
been raining men at my house since 1980. I got married in or occupy at any given moment. When they get tired of that subject, they put it away
August of that year and began my personal journey of Rain and pick another. They don’t mix the boxes; they use only one at a time. The addition-
Man. For those of you who are not familiar with that movie, al insight is that they have at least one of these compartments that is completely empty!
it’s about two brothers – one a handsome yuppie type, the When they say they are not thinking or doing anything, they mean it!
other an autistic savant. When their dad passed away, the How in the world can a woman ever deal with or understand that? Our brains
family fortune was mainly left to the son with the physical struggles, and the story plot are wired to think of a thousand things at once and they are all co-mingled. We don’t
is about the more fortunate son taking on his otherwise embarrassing brother so that have compartments; everything is somehow related to the next and we can tell you
he can share in the prosperity. Learning to live and communicate with him is a huge how. To muddy those waters, we don’t just mix the subjects; we throw in all the emo-
part of the drama of the movie. That is how I see my life. tions that go with each.
I was raised in a home of four women and one brother; however, being nine Thirty years later, here I am still confused and living the same scenario. I’ve
years older than I, he was out of the house by the time I realized we were different. I spent a lot of time living with, loving and raising wonderful men. My heartstrings love
can honestly say I started out on this journey with a huge handicap – and one I’m not little boys. Their zest for life and logical ways are contagious. But I still don’t under-
sure will ever change. My sisters and I are different; but, we are women, and I think we stand how they think. I’ve had thousands of conversations and can still walk away with
speak the same basic language. I had absolutely no idea that the communication gap only silence and questions.
and understanding ways between a man and woman were greater than any generation Charlie Babbitt came to love and appreciate his brother and the way he lived
gap would ever be. Mom forgot to tell me. Perhaps in our home of four women, she and viewed life, although he would never totally be able to understand it. There were
didn’t think it was necessary information. In the years to come, however, it would have some things about it that were special.
proved to be invaluable. I have often said that if genies were real and I had a chance for one wish, it
In 1982, just two years into a marriage and learning to live with another per- would be to live inside the head of a man for one day. I truly want to understand the
son (and a man at that), I gave birth to my first child, who, of course, was a boy. way they think and view life. However, the men in my life warn me that would be a
Nineteen months later, I had my second child, another boy. Two and a half years later, scary thing – and not a good idea.
I found myself with a third child and a third son. I was one woman in a house of four So, for now, I will settle for appreciating our differences and that God gave me
men. the wonderful privilege of a husband and three sons as a personal learning tool. There
I don’t mean any disrespect when I say I felt like an idiot savant. I am a woman may be many days when I feel like the fish outside of the bowl. On those days, I have
with above-average intelligence; but, on any given day, I can feel pretty much like an idiot to grab a girlfriend for some laughing and talking
when trying to live and communicate in a world of men. I have not had the fortune of and shopping. Later, I will come back to my
a woman in the house that would talk and chat and giggle with me. There is no talk of world of sports and silence and men and the
soap operas or Dr. Phil. I’m the only one in the house that has a favorite American Idol, love they all somehow bring my way.
and we definitely don’t go shopping for that new dress or pair of shoes. I’ve learned to
live in and enjoy a world of sports and silence that can sometimes be deafening.
My mind jumps to the scenes in the movie of Rain Man when Raymond Babbitt
gets stuck on a phrase like “I am an excellent driver” and will say it at the most inap-
propriate or inopportune times. It drives his brother, Charlie, crazy because it doesn’t
really relate to the conversation or deal with the situation. Do men know that we
sometimes feel like that when we are around them
often? Sometimes, it seems that they have a
phrase they say just to appear they are
engaged in the conversation, but it can
be maddening. Is it a game they play
or is the way they function really
that simple and straightforward?
I have made a recent discov-
ery in talking to my husband and my
brother and listening to counselors and
motivational speakers, that men actually
have compartmentalized brains. They tell
me it’s like a series of boxes and they pick
which one they want to deal with or use

Paige Thomas lives in Florence with her

husband, Joey, and two Sheltie pups. She has
three grown sons and four stepchildren.
37 5/21/09 12:00 PM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 37

Women’s Wellness Workshop:

June 13th • 9am-12pm
Horse-Centered Activity, Relaxation Technique, and Benefits of
Massage by Larry Webster LMT (chair massage
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Boys & Girls 12-17 if only
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1381-A Celebration Blvd • Florence, SC 29501 • (843) 407-5264
38 5/21/09 12:52 PM Page 1
Courtney Paige Driggers
is the eight-year-old daughter of
Michelle and Tad Driggers of
Florence. She has three-year-old
twin sisters, Ashlyn and Gracelyn.
As an Honor Roll Student in
the third grade at Delmae Heights
Elementary School in Florence, her
favorite subject is Social Studies. A
chorus and drama student, she also
takes jazz at Showbiz Studio. She
enjoys singing
This month’s “Wee She” was submitted by Kate’s mother, Amy Sansbury. If you would like to nominate a little girl
for “Wee She,” send an e-mail to editor@shemagazine.com with “Wee She” Nomination as the subject.
and dancing with her sisters.
Her favorite music is Country;
Taylor Swift is her favorite
artist.
Courtney enjoys cooking
and trying out new recipes. Red
Courtney’s plans for the summer
Velvet Cake and Shrimp Fettuccini
include going to the beach; she
Alfredo are her favorite dishes to
loves walking on the beach and
cook. She watches Paula Deen on
picking up seashells. She also plans
the cooking channel and she has
to go fishing with her dad, stay up
also taken cooking classes at Young
late at night – and shop!
Chefs Academy.
41 5/26/09 8:05 PM Page 1
One Bad Apple
Doesn't Spoil
the Whole Bunch, Girls
by Ferebe Gasque
Ahhhn, men,.. can’t live with ‘em, can’t live without ‘em.
That’s what the famous “they” say, isn’t it? Sort of like tech-
nology, I guess. Except with technology you can call a repair-
man or buy a new one.
June is traditionally the “men” issue of She Magazine. So, I started thinking
about all of the men in my life. I’ve often been asked why I never got married. My tra-
ditional answer is “I never found a man good enough for me.” While my high standards
and qualifications for a husband probably did weed out some possibilities when I was
younger, the truth of the matter now is that adjusting to living with someone who is
likely as set in his ways as I am in mine would be quite an endeavor. That being said, I
suppose if God wants me to get married, He will help me adjust to all the changes, too.
In the meantime, I’ve learned that being single and over 50 is not always a negative thing.
But, this is supposed to be about men. Hmmmm . . . where do I begin?
The first man in my life was my Daddy. He was from a maternally dominated
family. At an early age, I imagine, he determined that his family would not follow suit.
He was definitely in charge in our family. You’ve heard the saying, I’m sure, “If Mama
ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” Well, in the Gasque household, if Clarence wasn’t
happy was the mantra instead. I know my Daddy loved us. It wasn’t always obvious
through his sometimes gruff exterior; but, he loved us. He worked hard to provide for
us. We always had food on the table and appropriate clothes to wear. My mother was
able to be a stay-at-home mom. She had been a very successful cosmetologist in the
1930s, prior to her marriage to my dad. When she returned to work for Queen Ann
Sims (her previous employer) thirty years later, she again made some of those same
ladies even more beautiful. But, family always came first. Daddy always came first. All
of our schedules revolved around him.
When I was growing up, most of the men in my life were authority figures.
There were teachers and principals at school, ministers at church, law enforcement offi-
cers, firemen, and others. Typically, there was a sense of respect and awe and a little
fear thrown in. My, have times changed in this world!
When I was a freshman in college, I had dated this guy for about three weeks
when he said,“God told me we were supposed to get married.” I found that interest-
ing, since God had not conveyed a similar message to me. In fact, thirty-eight years
Ferebe Gasque is the Music Therapist at McLeod Hospice House, a Service Coordinator with Florence County DSN Board and an Independent Consultant with the Pampered Chef. ®
In her spare time, she follows orders from her feline children with whom she lives in Florence.
later, He still hasn’t sent me the memo. I learned many years after the pronouncement
that this same fellow had dated a friend of mine later that summer and had the same
revelation from God regarding his future with her. Neither of us is sure what ever hap-
pened to him. Some poor unsuspecting girl who didn’t have a strong faith probably fell
for his proclamation. That’s a scary thought but probably true.
Thankfully, most of the men I have known have been decent and honest and
caring. Of course, there have been exceptions. Most of them, however, have learned
what their mothers taught them and have carried those positive attributes throughout
their lives.
I know several men who unashamedly will hug their adult sons in public. That’s
what I call a real man. So often, men feel they need to be stoic in public. While I don’t
approve of gushy public displays of affection by either gender (or a combination there-
of), it’s refreshing to me to see men who are secure enough in their own skin to
express their emotions honestly and appropriately.
I know I’ve never been a man, but I’ve been around them long enough to have
learned a thing or two. I’ve learned that men and women are, in fact, different in many
ways. But, the two genders also have many similarities. I’ve learned that most men real-
ly are good guys. There are a few rotten apples in the barrel. But, be honest ladies,
there are some girls you don’t really want to be around either, aren’t there?
I’ve learned that God made each of us with a purpose and that, if we will strive
to follow His will for our lives, we can all make a positive impact on our world. I’ve
learned that in His love there is always a place and a way of beginning again.
I’m glad God created men and women to be different. According to Genesis,
He made us to be complementary to each other. We need to learn to be more com-
plimentary to each other, too.
Loving Father,You have shown us the perfect model of what a man needs to be and
how a man needs to live. Thank you for that example. Thank you for the men who are com-
mitted to follow in Your way. Help those of us who love them to be an encouragement as they
follow You. Help us to see their positive contributions and to minimize their shortcomings, real-
izing that we aren’t perfect, either. Grant all of us the grace to listen and to encourage and
to bless those whose lives we touch. Thank you for making us – both men and women – in
Your image. Help us to live in a way that shows others through our words and actions that
we are Yours. Amen.
42 5/25/09 12:25 PM Page 1

shop
talk with

JERRY WEAVER
About Me: I have always had a passion for artistic expression. Way back when I was in school, it was painting and drawing. After
graduation, it evolved into music; I was the lead singer for a local Beach Music band. That lasted about thirty years. I was also
involved in the construction of furniture at La-Z-Boy East for twenty-some years. My wife and son, Eddie, help out with wood-
working projects occasionally. I hope to introduce and teach my grandchildren my craft one day. The main thing
that I would like folks to know about me is that I love what I do.

Weaver Woodworking’s Origin: Actually, giving my hobby a name – Weaver Woodworking – just kind of hap-
pened when I saw the need to have business cards printed. I never dreamed that so many people would be interested in my work in the beginning (which,
by the way, started out with my little rocking horses). For those that don’t know, I’m the guy in the red truck they see around the area at Christmas with the
rocking horses riding on the back of the truck. I get a real kick out of people flagging me down to get a closer look.

What We Do: My motto is,“If it’s wood, we do it.” As of today’s date, I have not turned anyone away. Sometimes, we do it even if it isn’t wood. I’m referring
to the “Down-A-Clown” (hand-painted clown faces) carnival game that I built for a local church for their fall festival. It involved cloth and a sewing machine
and a lot of hand-painted clown faces. Beyond that, I would have to say we make dreams come true. If a client can express to me what they want, I can
usually build it. Most of the time when I take on a project for someone (speaking mostly regarding furniture), it’s because they know exactly what they
want, but they can’t find it in the retail market. For example, I recently built a tall TV stand for a couple that had a picture of a cabinet available local-
ly. The only problem was, the one they could buy in the furniture store was six inches too wide for the space they wanted to put it in. I have also
done quite a bit of cabinet work, built intricate stairways and trimed out houses. A large part of my business is furniture and cabinet repair.

Most Popular Items: I would have to say my most popular items are the things that I build for children (personalized rocking chairs, rocking hors-
es and toy boxes). Hopefully, the quality that I build into these items will make them family heirlooms. I build them to last. Oftentimes, grand-
parents that buy these things from me will tell me where they are sending them. Going by this information, my products are all over the United
States. While I do have several products that have become poplar such as the children’s items, lately it has been the cypress porch swings and
gliders and the Gamecock sign. Most of my work is custom one-of-a kind pieces. I do try to keep a few children’s rocking chairs and horses
on hand, as well as porch swings.

Most Rewarding Work: Some of the most rewarding work that I do is repairing family heirloom pieces for people, which has included reweav-
ing cane seats and backs of chairs. The glues used on a lot of older furniture is not anywhere near the quality that is available today. I have had
furniture brought to me in boxes to re-assemble.

Most Prized Pieces of Work: My most prized piece to date is an antique oak rocking chair replica that I built back in January of this year. Mary
Lundgren from Wisconsin came through Florence and saw my ad in She Magazine. She told me that they had a chair in their family that was orig-
inally their grandmother’s. Unfortunately, there was one chair and two granddaughters that wanted it. She said she had approached many wood-
workers over the years and couldn’t find anyone willing to take on the task of replicating it. She e-mailed photos to me and I told her that I
would like to give it a try. I had wanted to build an adult chair for a long time and this appeared to be the per-
fect opportunity to do it. She was able to pry the chair away from her sister long enough for me to make
some templates and take some measurements. After sitting in it myself, I named it the “Magical
Rocking Chair.” There was something very special about it. So, before building one for Mrs.
Lundgren, I built one for myself. Other than that, I have built several bedroom suites
and most of the furniture in my home. I am a fanatic about quality hardwood furni-
ture. I hope that my heirs will prize my furniture when I’m no longer around.

Father’s Day Suggestions: I suggest a porch swing or glider. For the sports-minded, I
have Clemson and Carolina yard signs, among several other hand carved signs target-
ed at fathers. Perhaps Dad would like a new doghouse for his “best friend.”

Contact Me: I do not operate a store to speak of, just a workshop. I will meet with
clients at my home or at theirs to discuss potential projects. I have a website
(www.weaverwoodworking.com) that displays photos of past projects and I have many
personal pieces in my home that I would be glad to show to clients so that they can
see the quality of my work firsthand. My hours are very versatile. My phone number is
843-665-7474.
Jerry Weaver and his wife, Sharon, live in Florence.
They have four children and thirteen grandchildren.
43 5/20/09 3:47 PM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 43

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44 5/22/09 11:36 AM Page 1

Shero
(& Hero)

ADAM
& CARLA
WRIGHT
“It is the goal of A Choice 2 M8K to reach out
to women and men of all ages in the Pee Dee who
find themselves affected by a crisis or unexpected
pregnancy in order to promote pro-life options. ”
-by Cookie Cawthon

H Her breath is shallow and her abdomen tied in knots as she scans the
drug store aisle signs to determine where she might find what she needs. She
doesn’t make eye contact with other shoppers for fear that they may see her story
in her eyes. She doesn’t stand too close for fear that someone might sense the
tension in her body. She waits until no one is on the aisle to make her way down
it. She pretends to check out other products – afraid of being seen.
Once she is sure no one is remotely close by, she quickly reads the front
of the boxes before her. 99% Accurate. Easy to Read Results. Results 5
Days Sooner.
He’s waiting in the car, so she hastily grabs her choice and darts
to the cashier when she sees that the coast is clear.
One line or two? A plus or a minus in the indicator window?
Longest three minutes on the planet. Receiving a positive mark on a test
doesn’t always seem like something to celebrate. That A on her Calculus test –
definitely! That plus on her pregnancy test…
Oh, no!
This young couple has a choice to make. And soon (fall of this year) there
will be a new community organization to help people who find themselves living
out this scenario – the scenario of an unexpected or crisis pregnancy.
Though Florence had long been served by the ministry of Bethany
Christian Services, a non-profit adoption and family service agency, Bethany closed
its Pee Dee office last year, leaving the area without crisis pregnancy counseling and
assistance. That was unacceptable to a group of local Christians who organized
around the cause; they formed a steering committee (which has now grown into a
Board of Directors) to begin the process of establishing Florence’s first crisis preg-
nancy center. Though it has already been a massive group effort, two individuals
have poured themselves into this vision: Adam and Carla Wright.
Adam and Carla, originally from Rome, Georgia, have made Florence their
home for the past six years. The couple will celebrate eleven years of marriage this
July and have a two year-old son,Adam Jr. Adam spent six years as a youth pastor
before becoming the minister of music at the Palmetto Street Church of God.
Carla has served there as the music and fine arts and drama coach for the past six
years. Together she and Adam, having worked in ministry for twelve years, have a
history and a passion for investing in the lives of youth and promoting wise deci-
sion-making among them. Carla has also put that passion to work professionally
for the past six years, working as a Prevention Specialist for four years and a Birth
Parent Counselor for almost two.
So, as the local effort to create a new crisis pregnancy center began to
gain momentum, the Board considered Carla a most logical choice for the position
of Executive Director. Since then, she and Adam have worked tirelessly to bring A
Choice 2 M8K Crisis Pregnancy Center into fruition. The center will be affiliated
with Care Net, a national organization that specializes in the foundation and daily
operation of 1160 pregnancy centers, and has already received amazing support
and encouragement from the local community: OB/GYNs volunteering free ultra-
sounds, attorneys volunteering their expertise in starting a non-profit organization,
and a small army of Facebook friends excited about the vision for the center.
It is the goal of A Choice 2 M8K to reach out to women and men of all
ages in the Pee Dee who find themselves affected by a crisis or unexpected preg-
nancy in order to promote pro-life options. They will provide free and confiden-
tial pregnancy testing, pregnancy counseling, post-abortion counseling, parenting
classes, abstinence training in the community, adoption information, and birth con-
trol information. The center will also distribute free baby and maternity items.
At this stage in the game, Carla is spearheading the effort to raise money,
enlist and train volunteers, and publicly promote the center;Adam is devoting many
volunteer hours and has been a significant help to Carla in the areas of fundraising
and publicity. In a collaborative effort with the Board, the Wrights are helping make
it happen. Carla and Adam state, “It is impossible to think of ourselves as a Hero
and Shero because of the tremendous amount of time and effort each board mem-
ber and volunteer has put forth. Anyone who has a part in saving lives and/or
changing them for the better is a hero.”
Carla and Adam feel unworthy of being in the spotlight of this endeavour.
Numerous Christians and community leaders have put forth their effort of sup-
port through work and prayer.To the steering committee and Board of Directors;
words could never testify of your dedication. However, every Pro-Life decision
makes it all worth while.
Currently, the center is in need of monetary donations, new and used
baby and maternity items, and volunteers for the hotline, crisis pregnancy training,
fundraising events, prayer support, and day-to-day office operations. Anyone inter-
ested in contacting the center or getting involved may email
achoice2m8k@gmail.com.

Cookie Cawthon is blessed to be wife to Chris, mother to Carson (6) and Campbell (3), Diet Pepsi addict, and crazy-excited greeter at NewSpring Church’s Florence campus.
44 5/22/09 11:36 AM Page 2
45 5/26/09 10:30 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 45

Congratulations
Tonda Spinks, R.N.

We think all of our nurses offer

quality and compassionate care.
You told us Tonda surpassed
your expectations.
When we asked you to help us select a nurse who had gone above and
beyond the call of duty to help you or a family member as a patient, you
responded with stories that touched our hearts and confirmed what we
already knew. All of our nurses are extraordinary.

One nurse, however, did stand out among such an incredible group of healthcare professionals.
Tonda Spinks, R.N., was our winner. Her dedication to providing outstanding care exceeds not only
our expectations, but also those of our patients. We thank Tonda and we congratulate her for making
a difference in our community.

www.c a rolinashospital.c om
46-47 5/26/09 9:29 AM Page 1
IN HIS OWN WORDS
Pictured left to right: Sarah, Rankin, Larry and Joanna Miller
LARRY MILLER
“ A major point I would like to make on celebrating Father’s
Day, whether you are a dad or the spouse or child of a dad,
Father’s Day is a day of appreciation – appreciation
in both directions, family for dad, dad for family.
G reetings from a typical American Dad – actually, not so typical. Well,
perhaps more typical than I suppose. We all have this idea of what a Father – or Dad
– or Daddy – is supposed to be. We all aspire to be, yet we all wonder, “Am I a good
dad?” With Father’s Day upon us, we stop and contemplate.
I’m a Florence native, and like many, have moved away and moved back sever-
al times, finally settling in for good in the mid 80’s. I was trying to carve out the
American Dream – wife, children, house and job (though not necessarily in that order).
Life had been great, but it had also been a great mess at times. As an adventurous and
fun-loving young adult, I managed to juggle school, work, relationships and play about as
poorly as can be imagined. Then, I turned 30.
The Lord, with His mighty hand, had His usual splendid plan, but I was naively
unaware of all the changes swirling about me. Within a few years, I resolved to have a
family, met Rankin, wonderful individual that consented to marry me, went back to
school, changed jobs and, then, in a total blindside event, was saved through Christ. Talk
about a blessing!
It wasn’t too long before I became an actual dad – August 20, 1985 to be exact.
The experience is unlike any other, as most of us know. However, for us, there was a
fork in the road and we went down a path that would be the greatest and worst one any-
one can imagine.
We had a son, Lawton. He was born handicapped with a rare syndrome called
Prader-Willi. Lawton would be almost normal looking – but not quite. He would almost
have normal intelligence – but not quite. He would have an eating disorder – and it was
quite severe. Despite the shattering realization of what we were facing, Rankin and I
resolved to be the best parents we could be and to bring him up in the most normal way
possible. Lawton grew up to be friendly, caring and personable. He even graduated from
high school, despite the experts’ predictions. Most important of all, he was my son and I
loved him unconditionally.
Rankin and I were soon to have two more children, Joanna and Sarah, born in
1988 and 1989 – two girls that would grow up to be beautiful, inside and out. Ours was
Larry Miller and his wife, Rankin, live in Florence. They have three children – Joanna, Sarah and Lawton, who is in Heaven.
”
a different household due to Lawton’s special needs, yet it was a normal household with
all the typical activities and chaos that you would expect. School, church and extracurric-
ular activities made for a full life and I felt blessed to be able to have too much going on.
Through all the years, we did what we could for our children, materially. More important-
ly, however, was the importance to keep a foundation of love and grace as the premise for
how we lived. I recall telling people on more than one occasion that my goal in life was to
be a good dad. That’s a simple remark, but one that carries a huge amount of meaning and
responsibility. It also meant being a good husband, a good provider and instilling proper
values and character in my children, mostly by example by who I am and what I do and say.
My own father, who is still alive and quite well at age 87, did what I consider a
wonderful job at this task of balancing discipline and freedom. Rankin and I constantly tried
to strike that balance of not being too strict or too loose. With Lawton, however, it was
tough and we were never quite sure. Part of the mystery of parenthood is wondering if
you did a good job raising your children.
Lawton can only be held up as someone that seemed to lead a good life, despite
all that he had going against him. A little over four years ago, at age 19, he became very
sick and died. The role of dad changed once again for me. This time, however, as some-
one who lost his son and couldn’t do anything about it. Dads always like to imagine that
they can fix things – or be in charge. This was way beyond that. Life would be different
now.
There is this thing called grief – and there’s nothing like it. The intensity is beyond
what you can imagine. Here’s why. People have often said to me,“I can’t imagine losing a
child.” Well, you can’t, because merely trying to comprehend becomes too painful. Grief
also encompasses all other emotions, which is played out during the immediate days after
the death of a loved one. Our extended family was wonderful during the days following
Lawton’s death and the love and support of all our friends was unbelievable. Eventually,
Matthew Neal Tyler (Matt) and his children, Alana (11) and Austin (8), live in
however, everyone drifted
Florence. He back to theirwith
is an attorney lives.
the In
lawour
firmlives, theBridges,
of Aiken, grief stayed. This &isTyler.
Nunn, Elliott when
our family went through its greatest challenge; it’s a point when many families disintegrate
after the loss of a loved one
46-47 5/26/09 9:29 AM Page 2

continued...
There is this thing called joy – and there’s nothing like it. Having a deep
sense of faith was of immense consequence as our family sought to recover from our
loss. I’ve shared with many my whimsical affinity for the phrase “and they all lived
happily ever after,” saying I prefer all movies to end this way. The reality for me is
that this is how I expect to end up one day – in Heaven with my whole family – liv-
ing happily ever after. This comforting absolution of belief is of great value in work-
ing through the grief, as well as (and this I cannot emphasize enough) the willingness
of everyone to accept that we all grieve in our own time. It just takes some longer
to get over things than others, but time does help. It also helps to tell people,“Most
of the time, I’m okay and, sometimes, I’m not.” For some odd reason, people are usu-
ally pleased to hear this, as if they are glad to see you in good spirits at the moment
but having satisfied their concern that you are still dealing with loss. Though we may
stubbornly resist, time does bring about healing. If we are willing, with the passage
of time, we conclude that life goes on and we are to be fully involved in it. That, how-
ever, is a conscious decision that many are unwilling to make. Within our family, we
chose the path of joy.
So, as a dad, what has this meant and where has it led? Joy, for me, is being
able to be with my family – Rankin, Joanna and Sarah – and simply enjoy each other’s
company in free-flowing conversation, cutting up and laughing at life’s foibles and frus-
trations. Also, as a dad, it is my hope that my girls have developed a balanced per-
spective on life, willing to look at both sides of everything and respecting differing
points of view. I wish for them to have fun (but not too much) and to be responsi-
ble and thrifty (but not a Scrooge). I wish for them to be comfortable with who they
are, unpretentious and genuine. Mostly, I wish for them to be compassionate and
understanding of those less fortunate. From their own experience growing up, I
think they have already accomplished this.
A major point I would
like to make on celebrating
Father’s Day, whether you are a
dad or the spouse or child of a
dad, Father’s Day is a day of
appreciation – appreciation in
both directions, family for dad,
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Larry Miller with son, Lawton
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the day of those around you.
For me, on Father’s Day, there will be moments of reflection that suddenly next home. If you’re already an SCE&G natural gas
remind me of that sense of emptiness in my heart, but there will also be periods of customer and want to add additional natural gas
joy when reflecting on specific times when Lawton and I were together (like a foot-
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hole in my heart from not having him here. But, that is offset by my choosing to recall or visit SCE&G’s virtual home at sceg.com/value.
something silly that my son said or did, with the resultant chuckle of contentment.
See, it’s a mixture of emotions and they all need to be experienced and acknowl-
edged in accepting the way things are.
These things together – the tears and the laughter, the sadness and the fond
recollections – all give us a richness of spirit in recognizing our unconditional love
for our offspring.To deny any of these is to limit our depth of feeling and understand-
ing in assessing that which is dear. Life is different without our loved ones, but they
are no less loved, nor are they forgotten. Neither is life over and the ones who have
passed on certainly wouldn’t want us sitting around moping all day long.
Therefore, I have chosen to have a very nice Father’s Day. It could be emo-
tional. It could have its ups and downs. That’s okay. My son will be delighted to see
that we are joyful in life on earth. And some day, when we all are living happily ever www.comfortableresponsible.org www.sceg.com/value
after, we’ll talk with him about it.
Meanwhile, spend your Father’s Day in a fashion that brings joy to both
yourself and, more importantly, to the ones you love.
48 5/25/09 12:26 PM Page 1
ANDROPAUSE:
The Male
Menopause
by J. Marshall Dent, III, MD
W ith June being the month we celebrate Father’s Day, what better time to
give the men some press. I have written many articles about hormones and their
effects on women. Why not discuss the issue about hormones and how they affect
men? This article will probably be read by very few men, so it is important for you,
women, to take the message to your husbands or significant others.
There is a one-percent-per-year decline in testosterone levels after age 30.
During the years between ages 40 and 55, men often experience symptoms of what
is termed,Andropause. It is the gradual decline in testosterone in men associated with
aging. I first started addressing this hormone imbalance in men in regards to weight
loss. I noticed that men have the same issues as women when it comes to hormon-
al balance in that as their testosterone levels decline, their weight increases.
It is estimated that four to five million men in the United States have testos-
terone deficiency, yet less than five percent are being treated for their disorder.
Although estrogen is considered the standard of care for menopausal women, andro-
gen replacement is not well accepted for men. Most all of my male patients are
referred to me by their wives for hormone treatment. Well, ladies, how do you deter-
mine if your husbands have an androgen deficiency? Have your husband (or yourself)
answer the following questions:
• Do you have decreased sex drive?
• Do you have a lack of energy?
• Do you have a decline in strength?
• Are you moody and easily irritated?
• Have you noticed a decline in sexual performance?
• Are you having a hard time losing weight?
• Are you falling asleep after dinner?
• Are you having trouble losing weight?
If he answered yes to any three, he should be tested for testosterone deficiency.
Another problem is that obesity further lowers testosterone levels. The Journal of
Clinical Endocrinology & Metabolism showed that overweight men have androgen lev-
els 30 to 40 percent lower than those of lean men. Other hormones such as corti-
sol and leptin can lower testosterone, as well. The biggest problem with being over-
weight is that obesity causes men to have high estrogen levels. Fat cells contain an
enzyme known as aromatase, which converts testosterone to estrogen. We all know
what excess estrogen can do to women and their weight. As testosterone levels
decline, it leads to a decline in growth hormone, leading to a further decline in mus-
cle mass and increase in body fat.
If you have questions about the information in this article, you may contact Dr. Dent at Complete Women’s Health Care in Florence.
Dr. Dent is Board Certified in Family Practice and Obstetrics and Gynecology and also holds an Advanced Certification in Menopausal Medicine.
Well, how do we determine if one is low in testosterone? A total testos-
terone should be checked between 7 and 10 AM. The normal range is above 400ng/dl,
but this may also require treatment if he is having symptoms. What I mean is, a par-
ticular man may function well at 600ng/dl, but the decline has his levels at 450ng/dl and
he is symptomatic. Therefore, you have to base it on the clinical picture, not just the
lab value. I also look at a baseline estrogen level because, with treatment, you don’t
want to increase the estrogen level. I also get a baseline prostate-specific antigen level
because we need to make sure the level doesn’t rise after treatment. It is also impor-
tant to make sure there is not an underlying prostate problem.
Once we have identified a problem of low testosterone, there are several
modalities of treatment that are available. It is a little tricky with testosterone treat-
ment in men in that you must not give it in too high a dose or too rapid an onset of
action. The reason is the testosterone will be converted to estrogen and this coun-
teracts the benefit you are trying to achieve. My idea on treatment is to use topical
testosterone in a low dose and slowly increase the dose until symptoms are resolved
and then measure the level. This is the level you must try to maintain. This can be
done through patches and gels and long-acting pellets.
There is a commercially-available product, AndroGel, which can be found at
the pharmacy. It is probably the most prescribed product for testosterone replace-
ment for men. The dose has some down sides in that it requires a large area for ade-
quate absorption and this can be messy. It often ends up on the sheets, clothing and
loved ones. It is also very expensive. I prefer testosterone creams made up by a com-
pounding pharmacist that can provide testosterone in a stronger strength, which
requires less to be applied – and at a reduced cost.
There are ways to increase your testosterone naturally, primarily through
exercise, which focuses on weight resistance training. The supplements that raise
testosterone and lower estrogen include B6 and B12, magnesium, omega three fatty
acids found in flaxseed and fish oil, saw palmetto, vitamin C and E and zinc. I would
encourage any man over the age of 45 to supplement his diet with zinc, 50mg twice
a day, which helps prevent the aromatization of testosterone to estrogen.
Ladies, men are often too proud to admit (even to themselves) that they may
be sliding into andropause. So, if you feel like your man is lacking that spark that he
once had and you want to persuade him to at least try to get back to the energetic,
loving and romantic man you fell in love with, I encourage you to drag him to get test-
ed. It’s the first step to improving his health, longevity and sex life.
51 5/25/09 12:14 PM Page 1
52 5/26/09 4:41 PM Page 1

McLEOD HUMAN MOTION SPECIALISTS:

BRINGING MOVEMENT TO LIFE
A person's quality of life can be enhanced by the time they spend with their
loved ones, the satisfaction they achieve from their job, and the pleasure they receive
from doing the activities they enjoy. However, all of these things are compromised when
a person's quality of life is diminished or limited due to an illness, injury or even aging.
Fortunately, orthopedic and spine patients are able to improve their physical
wellbeing by achieving more function and movement through the services of McLeod
Human Motion Specialists.Through these services each patient is assessed, a personalized
treatment plan is developed, and a rehabilitation program is designed.This comprehensive
focus on the patient incorporates the specialties and medical teams of four areas: Spine
Care, Joint Care, Rehabilitation Services, and Sports Medicine.
“The McLeod Human Motion Specialists are unique because of the collaboration
of surgeons from eight practices coming together to develop a new higher standard of
care for patients with orthopedic and spine needs," said Marie Segars, Administrator
of McLeod Regional Medical Center. "We do not intend to settle for average results.
We are setting goals and expectations for higher outcomes as we perfect our surgical
programs, treatment and exercise therapies to truly bring movement back to the lives
of those who have known pain and restrictions in their daily activities.Working together
is powerful and patients will benefit from this collaboration among surgeons, physicians,
therapists, nurses and even coaches and trainers in our region."
The physicians and surgeons associated with McLeod Human Motion
Specialists have advanced orthopedic and spine training, and specialization that
patients can trust to help them achieve optimal results.The areas of expertise include
joint replacement and reconstruction, spine care, sports medicine, trauma, hand and
upper extremity, pediatrics, foot and ankle, physical medicine and rehabilitation.
The team of McLeod Human Motion Specialists work together to maximize
the success of each patient's recovery and are committed to providing the highest level
of care to all patients.
For more information or for a referral to a McLeod Human Motion
Specialists call 1-800-877-6762.To learn more about the services offered by McLeod
Human Motion Specialists, visit www.mcleodmotion.org.

MCLEOD HUMAN MOTION SPECIALISTS INCLUDES THE FOLLOWING PHYSICIANS:

FLORENCE NEUROSURGERY AND SPINE, P.C FLORENCE ORTHOPAEDIC
ASSOCIATES

Dr. James Brennan Dr.William Naso Dr. Christopher Paramore Dr. Andrew Rhea Dr. Alfred Dawson Dr. George Dawson, III

MCLEOD MCLEOD
MCLEOD ORTHOPAEDICS ORTHOPAEDICS ORTHOPAEDICS
SEACOAST DILLON

Dr. Rodney Alan Dr. Brian Blair Dr. Albert Gilpin Dr.Thomas Mezzanotte Dr. Kyle Watford Dr. Frederick Hamilton Dr. Michael Sutton

PEE DEE ORTHOPAEDIC ASSOCIATES

PEE DEE SPINE CENTER

HAND MCLEOD FAMILY/

SURGERY SPORTS
ASSOCIATES MEDICINE CENTER

Dr. Anthony Alexander Dr. A. Cecil Bozard, Jr. Dr. Rakesh Chokshi Dr. Barry Clark Dr. Patrick Denton

Dr. Robert Moore Dr.Timothy Dancy

Dr.W.S. "Bill" Edwards Dr. Robert Elvington, Jr. Dr. Dewey Ervin Dr. Douglas Freels Dr. Nigel Watt
53 5/21/09 3:24 PM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 53

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843-665-0846
Call for your Reservation today!

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54 5/21/09 3:32 PM Page 1

Chicks of the Month

She Magazine
&

Ascension Hospice
of Florence

From left to right: Ashlee Emerson, Kathy Riggan, RN, Cayla Avant, RN,
Diane Watson, LBSW, MS, Brandy Flowers, RN, Rebecca Fogleman, RN
In a letter to She Magazine,Virginia K. Roof, R.N.
Case Manager, wrote:

I would like to invite you to meet the compassionate and car-

ing team of Ascension Hospice in Florence. This group of awesome and
privileged to work alongside these dedicated, selfless and compassionate
individuals and I feel inspired to see the differences each one of them make
giving people deserves to be nominated for She Magazine’s “Chicks of the to our wonderful patients each and every day.
Month.” Therefore, I would like to nominate our wonderful office at Ascension
Ascension Hospice is a family-owned hospice serving terminally ill Hospice, as I believe they deserve to be recognized for the tremendous
patients across South Carolina. Our rapidly growing organization was service they provide. Thank you.
established in 2000 with our corporate office being located in Irmo, SC.
We bring to our patients and their families the same personal attention
and care we would provide for our own families. We include our patients
and families in their plan of care to ensure them the fullest quality of life
possible.
Our multidisciplinary care encompasses the physical, environmen-
tal, psychological, emotional, social and spiritual needs of our patients and
their families. Our care team consists of Hospice Registered Nurses,
Clinical Social Worker, Hospice Chaplain,Volunteers and Certified Nursing
Assistants, as well as our wonderful Administrative staff.
Our team is dedicated to working earnestly together 24 hours a
day to make every moment matter for our patients and their families. I feel

If you would like to receive lunch courtesy of She Magazine and

Chick-fil-A at the Magnolia Mall, Magnolia Mall Drive-In and Florence
Darlington Tech locations, send a brief e-mail telling us why your office
or group should be Chicks of the Month to: editor@shemagazine.com
Niki Hill, RN (next to sign-right), Barbara Gaymon, RN,Virginia K. Roof (Jenny), RN,
Karen Ham, LMSW, Cynthia Heustess, RN,Veronica McElveen, RN, Christy Hardee
(Not pictured) Tabitha Lewis, RN
57 5/26/09 8:34 PM Page 1

.Shopping List
2 Cups of self-rising flour
2 Sticks of margarine - melted
1 Cup of chopped nuts
(I prefer walnuts)
1 8-ounce package of cream cheese
2 1/2 Cups of confectioners sugar
1 8-ounce tub of Cool Whip
4 Cups of fresh sliced peaches
1 Cup of sugar
4 Tablespoons of flour
5 Tablespoons of peach Jell-O

Directions
For First Layer: For Third Layer:
2 Cups of self-rising flour 4 Cups of fresh sliced peaches
2 Sticks of margarine – melted
Spread the peaches evenly over the
1 Cup of chopped nuts second layer.
(I prefer walnuts)

Combine all ingredients, mix well For Fourth Layer:

and spread on a buttered 9 x 12
dish. Bake at 375 until slightly
brown. Let cool.
For Second Layer:
1 8-ounce package of cream cheese
2 1/2 Cups of confectioners sugar
1 8-ounce tub of Cool Whip
Mix all ingredients and spread onto
the cooled crust.
1 Cup of sugar
4 Tablespoons of flour
5 Tablespoons of Peach Jell-O
1 Cup of water
Mix the sugar, flour and Jell-O well
in a sauce pan. Stir in the water
and cook over medium heat until
the mixture is thick and clear.
Cool completely and pour the
mixture over the peaches.
Refrigerate overnight or at least
8 hours.

From the kitchen of Melia Flowers Berry

P each D elight
I was introduced to this incredible peach dessert in the summer of
1987 when visiting my aunt, Jean Cox, (by marriage) at her home in Augusta,
Georgia. It was the most delicious dessert I had ever tasted and it still is. It’s
such a hit in our home that my children ask for it instead of birthday cake
since their birthdays are in the summer when fresh, ripe peaches are avail-
able.
In late May, I begin looking for the first peaches to arrive so that I
can make this special treat for my family. The hint of salt from the nuts in the
crust combines with the sweetness of the cream cheese mixture and the unex-
pected tanginess of the Peach Jell-O mixture to create a truly unique dessert
that is sure to be a summer favorite at your home, too! It’s called Peach
Delight, but it should be called Peach Heaven!
58 5/26/09 8:04 PM Page 1
Alan M. Blaker, M.D., F.A.C.C., F.A.C.P
Pee Dee Cardiology Associates
C ardiovascular disease is associated with many com-
monly known risk factors such as hypertension,
diabetes and smoking. Sleep disorders are also
known to affect cardiovascular health, but have not been typi-
cally reported or evaluated.. Sleep related breathing disorders
are highly prevalent among patients with cardiovascular dis-
ease. The most common category of sleep-related breathing
disorder is Obstructive Sleep Apnea (OSA). Obstructive Sleep
Apnea is defined as a repetitive interruption of ventilation dur-
ing sleep due to collapse of the upper airway. OSA is estimat-
ed to affect 15 million Americans and is more common in men
than women. The prevalence of cardiovascular disease is high-
er in those who have OSA than in patients without sleep dis-
orders.
The signs and symptoms of OSA include snoring
which is disruptive to sleep, witnessed gasping or cessation of
breathing during sleep, morning headache, hypersomnolence,
and an enlarged “crowded” neck. Hypersomnolence is exces-
sive drowsiness during the day, especially in the morning when
one should feel rested, and can have a strong impact on an indi-
vidual’s daily functions. The excessive drowsiness can affect an
individual by causing depression and fatigue.
Neck circumference is a good physical predictor of
sleep apnea. It is believed that the airway of the obese individ-
ual becomes obstructed by large tonsils, enlarged tongue and
increased fat in the neck, all pressing on the airway when the
pharyngeal (throat) muscles are relaxed with sleep. A neck cir-
cumference greater than 16 inches in a woman or greater than
17 inches in a man correlates with an increased risk for the dis-
order. Furthermore, increasing neck size has been shown to
correlate with the severity of apnea.
There is a significant relationship between sleep
apnea and cardiovascular disorders. OSA is a risk factor for
hypertension, stroke, Ischemic Heart Disease, Congestive
Heart Failure, and Arrhythmias (Atrial and Ventricular) and even
renal failure.
Hypertension (high blood pressure) affects approxi-
mately 20% of adults in the United States and is a major risk
factor for Coronary Artery Disease, CHF, stroke, and renal dis-
ease. Sudden drops in blood-oxygen levels due to sleep apnea
have been shown to increase blood pressure and strain the
cardiovascular system. In those people with hypertension
about 40-50% have also been found to have sleep apnea.
Sleep Disorders
&
Cardiovascular
Disease
by Alan M. Blaker, M.D., F.A.C.C., F.A.C.P
Stroke is the third leading cause of death in the
United States and the leading cause of disability. The more
common type of stroke (ischemic) can occur when the blood
supply to a part of your brain is interrupted or severely
reduced, thereby depriving brain tissue of oxygen and nutri-
ents. Sleep apnea can lead to a decreased output from the
heart and then reduced blood flow to the brain. Also in OSA
the blood can clot more easily, called hypercoagulability, and
there can be increased platelets aggregation (the clumping
together of platelets in the blood) increasing the risk of an
ischemic stroke due to clot formation. All of these factors put
an individual at an increased risk of stroke.
Heart attacks and angina (chest pain due to reduced
oxygen to the heart) also occur more frequently in patients with
OSA. There are several mechanisms to explain the increased
risk but, suffice it to say, that swings in blood pressure which
occur in OSA, reduction in oxygen to heart tissue and the
increased risk for clot formation as previously described all
may damage heart muscle, cause chest pain or worsen conges-
tive heart failure.
Arrhythmias are abnormal heart rhythms. In an
arrhythmia, the heartbeats may be too slow, too rapid, too
irregular, or too early. Rapid arrhythmias (greater than 100 beats
per minute) are called tachycardias. Slow arrhythmias (slower
than 60 beats per minute) are called bradycardias and some
irregular heart rhythms are called fibrillations (atrial fibrillation
and ventricular fibrillation). Arrhythmias are more frequent with
patients who have sleep apnea and worsen with the severity of
sleep apnea. Atrial Fibrillation is one of the arrhythmias more
commonly associated with sleep apnea and occurs when the
heart’s two upper chambers beat irregularly and out of coor-
dination with the heart’s two lower chambers. Also atrial fib-
rillation can lead to stroke. Arrhythmias are reported in up to
50% of patients with OSA and the slow arrhythmias (bradycar-
dia) are most common. More recently, sudden death has been
reported to occur more frequently at night in those with sleep
apnea.
Overnight polysomnography (sleep study) is the most
common study for diagnosing sleep apnea and is the gold stan-
dard diagnostic test. A polysomnogram is a sleep study
designed to find abnormalities of sleep. During a sleep study,
the patient is monitored during the different sleep stages. The
study records brain activity, eye movement and other muscle
If you are experiencing some of the symptoms of sleep apnea or if you have cardiovascular disease, please consult your primary
care physician or sleep disorder specialist in your area to consider an evaluation. They will be able to determine the best course of
action to address your symptoms and may refer you to a sleep center for a sleep study. You may also contact us at Pee Dee
Cardiology Associates (843-667-1891) to arrange a cardiovascular and/or sleep disorder evaluation.
activity, breathing, heart rate, the amount of oxygen in the
blood, and how much air moves in and out of the lungs while
sleeping. A polysomnogram is the best way to make a correct
diagnosis of sleep apnea.
The polysomnogram is a painless procedure per-
formed at a sleep center. During a sleep study, a certified sleep
specialist will place sensors on the patient’s body to record and
monitor body functions. The patient will then go to sleep as
usual and will be monitored by the sleep specialist during the
course of the night. Once a patient has been diagnosed with
sleep apnea, there are several available treatment options
which include: weight loss, oral appliances, behavioral changes,
Continuous Positive Airway Pressure (CPAP), or surgery.
Weight loss and behavioral changes can be effective
treatment options for sleep apnea, especially with mild cases.
Weight loss can be beneficial in that a reduction in the amount
of fat in a patient’s neck can alleviate some of the pressure and
making obstructions less likely to occur; however, it is always
advisable to talk with your doctor before beginning a weight
loss program. Behavioral changes, such as changing sleeping
positions, can also improve or lessen the severity of sleep
apnea. Sleeping on your side can lessen the effects of gravity,
which causes a person’s throat to narrow when they lay on
their back.
CPAP is the most effective method for treating OSA.
Using CPAP, a stream of air is delivered at a prescribed pres-
sure by a hose to a nasal pillow, nose mask or full-face mask,
essentially splinting the airway (keeping it open under air pres-
sure) so that unobstructed breathing becomes possible during
sleep. Other treatment options such as an oral appliance can
sometimes be effective for treating sleep apnea. Oral (dental)
appliances are used to treat sleep apnea by keeping the airway
open in one of three ways: pushing the jaw forward (mandibu-
lar advancement device), preventing the tongue from falling
back over the airway (tongue-retaining device), or by combining
both.
More severe cases of sleep apnea or those who can-
not tolerate CPAP may be addressed by performing surgery to
create a more open airway so obstructions are less likely.
Individuals diagnosed with OSA and who are considering sur-
gery, should talk to a sleep specialist and/or experienced ENT
surgeon about the different procedures, success rates and the
risks involved with surgery.
59 5/22/09 1:19 PM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 59

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60 5/25/09 10:57 AM Page 1
Chic k Lit
What’s on Sarah Marie Gooch’s Best-Seller List?
The Mermaid in the Basement
by Gilbert Morris
L ady Serafina Trent, a young widow who is raising a young
son with the help of her family, is outraged when an actress at
a local playhouse ends up dead and her younger brother is the main sus-
pect. It is true that he was infatuated with her; but, fortunately for him,
there are others who may have wanted the actress dead – and so begins
the hunt to find the killer. Though she is not formally trained as a detec-
tive, Serafina takes it upon herself to solve this crime because the local
police are ready to lock Clive up and throw away the key. With the help of
her new friend, Dylan Tremayne, Serafina is able to solve the mystery and,
with trepidation, begins to open her mind and heart to the possibility that
there is a God.
A wealthy widow of a nobleman, daughter of a famous scientist
and skeptic who only trusts what can be proven, meet Serafina Trent – a
woman about to take 19th Century London by storm. It’s London, 1857,
and everything is at stake for Serafina Trent. She is a woman of means but
not the typical Victorian lady who feels her place is to be seen and not
heard. When her brother’s most recent female dalliance, a beautiful actress,
is found murdered, all evidence points to him, especially since the actress
had just rejected him in a most public manner. Now, everyone believes
Clive is headed for the gallows. Everyone, that is, but Serafina. Determined
to prove her brother’s innocence, Serafina finds herself working with unlike-
ly allies, including Dylan Tremayne, a passionate storyteller and actor with a
criminal past. This novel will hold fans of mystery and history spellbound
until the very last page. Victorian England comes alive in this intriguing new
series from one of Christian fiction’s favorite authors.
This was an exciting and suspenseful novel, a great “who done it.”
I was hooked from the beginning. The characters come alive and I was
caught up in trying to figure out the mystery right along with Serafina. The
story involves very interesting characters and suspenseful situations.
Interesting history of 19th century London is weaved through a
story of battling personal demons and trusting new
friends. The story ends in a shocking twist that
I never would have anticipated.
Sarah Marie Gooch and her husband, Brent, live
in Florence. They have a dog, Franklin. Sarah
will be a senior in the fall at Francis Marion
University, majoring in Early Childhood
Education PreK-3rd Grade. She also works at
Chick-fil-A, is an elementary school tutor and a
babysitter. She enjoys reading, Frisbee golf,
surfing and snowboarding.
Got a good read? E-mail editor@shemagazine.com with your suggestion.
61 5/21/09 2:17 PM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 61

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F AT H E R H O O D :
The Role of a Lifetime
by Lea Pritchard-Boone, PhD

W
With all the articles and attention to motherhood, one could quickly forget
about the infinitely important father. We rely on their strength and protection. We
depend on their solid foundation. Whether it’s “Papa,” “Daddy,” “Dad,” “Pops” or
“Father,” whether in the home or not in the home, there is a defined identity for father-
ing. How families divide parenting and household roles differs from home to home; but
one truth is always constant – dads are so important.
The Early Years: Many fathers struggle with the new role of parent and may feel
steam-rolled by the instinctive and exhausting drives of the mother. Fathers develop a
sense of pride for their children, their own accomplishment of creating life and the iden-
tity of provider is thrust to the forefront, often creating anxiety. Although most dads try
to be hands-on, many feel less adept at infant care than mothers, further exacerbating
the anxiety related to the question,“What can I do to help?” Babies are able to differ-
entiate their father’s voice from a stranger’s voice within a few days of life. They enjoy
being held and listening to the different tone in their father’s voice. Just like mothers
adjust to their new role as a mother, don’t forget the silent partner. He is working
towards meeting up to his, his spouse’s and his child’s expectations. That can be a tall
order, but it’s an important one to fill.
Dads and Daughters: The relationship between dads and daughters develops dif-
ferently in families. Whether she’s a tomboy or likes to watch her skirt twirl, she cap-
tures his heart. However, fathers struggle sometimes with the pubescent daughter.
Rules seem to change overnight about what is and is not appropriate in their relation-
ship. This change can be hard for fathers and daughters, alike. Development of breasts,
interest in boys and increased feminist behaviors can be distressing to fathers. The pro-
tector within is activated as they have a whole new category of perceived predators –
the teenage boy. Some fathers make rigid rules. Some work on maintaining open com-
munication and some distance themselves and divert parenting to the mother. The best
approach to the normal developmental stage is to maintain your relationship with
your daughter. She’s still your little girl and always will be. A relationship with
her father will help her self-esteem and encourage her to say no to the bad
things. Fathers are more experienced in regards to the teen boy’s agenda and
calm discussions of what to be aware of is very important. Girls hear their
mothers, but they really listen to their fathers when discussing boys. Be careful
not to alienate your daughters with statements like, “You can’t date until your
30.” Yes, you mean this in jest (I hope), but it can feel like a punishment – a
punishment for being a girl, as I rarely hear the same statement applied to
sons. It also implies distrust and poor parental communication, flexibility
and empathy. It’s a normal anxiety to feel, but work with your daughter
by educating her. This is an area where dads can be experts. Be the
role model for the type of man you want her to marry; therefore, she
will require those positive characteristics of whom she dates.
they see, so be careful of your words and actions towards your son’s mother. Not only
will the son mirror the father’s actions towards the mother, he will generalize it to all
women. This is best done by fathers; mothers are not usually considered members of
the club (if you know what I mean). Be the man you want them to become. Sons do
best with clear verbally addressed home rules and leave little to nuance. As a father, it’s
important to lead your home, create your home rules and enforce its consequences.
Let your sons know that parenting is a joint venture and the rules of respect are the
same for their mothers. Talk to them about the bad things; lead them towards the good
things. Keep open communication. Make sure you discuss emotions, as well. It does-
n’t have to be touchy-feely, but sons do need to know that their dads have feelings and
know how to deal with them.
Dads and Moms: Dads are so important to the raising of their children. An equal
partner in parenting raises children to expect that of their spouse and also allows them
to contribute their unique gifts to their children. Dads and moms need to co-parent,
communicate, negotiate and present a united front. Family is first. Dads, be sure you
meet every three months (at least) to discuss how you and your partner approach par-
enting (whether together or divorced, it’s important). I mean, you change your oil in
your car that often. Doesn’t your family deserve the same attention? It’ll improve the
family mileage and efficiency. Remember, the focus is on the children. You will benefit
from their successes and deeply feel their failures. Stay involved so you can impact the
directions they choose.
Dads, you are needed, you are special, you are capable of parenting contribu-
tions that are difficult for mothers. Tell your spouse if she edges you out of parenting
and request an equal approach. I cannot begin to tell you the impact you will have.
Maybe I don’t have to tell you. Just do it – and you’ll see.
“A very special Happy Father’s Day to my husband, my partner. You are my
complete parenting complement, strong when I am not, patient when I struggle
and kind enough not to point it out. What a true gift you are to our son and to
his future. I can only hope he’ll take after his father.” - Lea Pritchard-Boone

Dads and Sons: Boys will be boys. Why do fathers want sons
so badly? Let’s be honest; it’s so they can be little boys again!
Fathers take on the fun role of playmate and the challenging role
of mentor. Fathers are the perfect parent for both; they don’t
bruise as easily. What fathers of sons should remember is to
give equal attention to developing the man within your boy, not
just honoring the boy within himself. The way they manage
conflict in friendships and romantic relationships will be a
direct result of the father’s influence. Children also do what

Dr. Lea Pritchard-Boone is the mother of Dalton (3) and wife to Austin.
She is Psychology Fellow of the LifeCare Psychology Group, LLC (formerly
known as the Behavioral Health Group), in Florence and focuses primarily
on treating children and adolescents.
63 5/20/09 4:35 PM Page 1
64 5/21/09 3:31 PM Page 1

Campus Chick
Camille
Cunningham
Clemson University

MY FAMILY: Parents, Margaret and Tim Cunningham; WORK: I’ll work this summer, but I chose not to work dur-
Sisters, Caroline McKillop and Claire Cunningham ing my freshman year of college because I thought the adjust-
ment would be enough to keep me busy.
HIGH SCHOOL: West Florence High School
ACTIVITIES AS A COLLEGE STUDENT: My friends
COLLEGE: Clemson University with plans to graduate in and I go to the football, basketball and baseball games. We
2012 also participated in small gatherings that were hosted outside
our dorms on Lever Beach for the freshman class. In my
ATTRACTION: I wanted to go to a school that was big spare time, I like to work out, play tennis, spend time with
enough for me to meet many different types of people but friends and family, hang out at the pool, shop around, read and
small enough so that I wouldn’t get lost in the number. go to the beach whenever I can.
Clemson is just that and has been a perfect fit.
BIGGEST LEARNING EXPERIENCE AS A COL-
LEGE STUDENT: I had to change my study habits and my
MAJOR: Pre-Professional Health Sciences
time management because my classes have been all over cam-
pus, at many different times during the day and they have left
FAVORITE SUBJECT: Psychology me with barely any time to study or get work done between
classes. Also, classes are completely different in college than
FAVORITE HANGOUTS IN CLEMSON: Lake in high school. Some professors have completely different
Hartwell, relaxing on Bowman Field and Lever Beach, Spill the expectations that I have had to adapt to. I have definitely had
Beans Ice Cream Shop to learn how to balance my time to keep up with family and
friends and maintain good grades, while still having some fun.
DREAM JOB: To own a boutique
IF I COULD DO ANYTHING DIFFERENTLY: I
SCHEDULE: During this school year, my schedule was would have tried to be a little more involved in other student
quite hectic. I think it mostly felt this way because I was still activities and I would have joined more clubs that would have
trying to get adjusted to college life. helped me meet other people and promoted my academics.

FURTHER EDUCATION PLANS: I would either like
to continue in the pre-professional health field or switch into
the nursing program at Clemson. I have seriously considered
continuing my education after college at the Medical
University of South Carolina in Charleston if I continue down
a professional health career path.
PLANS FOR THE SUMMER: I plan on traveling as
much as I can. Both my sisters are living in Charleston right
now. My oldest sister will be having her first child in
September and I want to be with her as much as possible to
help prepare for the baby. My other sister is engaged, so I
want to be with her to help plan the wedding. Plus, I’ll be
spending time in Florence with my parents.

Campus Chick
67 5/25/09 10:59 AM Page 1
Wings for the
ACCEPT THE
FATHER’S
T his month, we celebrate and honor fathers. Happy Father’s Day to all
you Dads! May God’s strength, grace and wisdom rest upon each of you as you
fulfill the God-ordained position of covering for your family. See Ephesians 5.
What a responsibility you fathers have to lead your family in the ways of the Lord.
Men should be heads of their homes out of respect to God - not as proud dicta-
tors. God ordained man’s position to be the covering and protection for the fam-
ily. In the absence of the father through death, divorce or refusal of this responsi-
bility, the mother becomes the main spiritual leader. In many homes today when
the father is not a committed Christian and does not guide his family in the Lord’s
ways, the mother has to take the responsibility of rearing the children spiritually.
These fathers who have not accepted the place of Christian leadership do not real-
ize how vulnerable he, his wife and children are to the attacks from the enemy.
When men refuse to give up harmful habits, lust, anger or abuse, it opens the door
for Satan to come in. While a praying wife and mother by herself can cause God’s
Hand to move, it is so much better for the family if Mom and Dad both are fulfill-
ing their spiritual leadership positions.
A bumper sticker reads,“Real men love Jesus.” Husbands and Dads, don’t
back down from the God-given place as a Christian leader of your home. Like
father, like son (or daughter). Your children are going to pick up some of your
habits, good or bad. They are going to follow in your footsteps in many ways.
Don’t allow the enemy, Satan, to get a foothold in your home through attacks on
you, your wife and children because you refuse to be the spiritual head of your
home. Dads, take the necessary steps to be the spiritual protection they need.
Likewise, children are to respect their father and mother and abide by their teach-
ings. See Ephesians 6:1, Proverbs 6:20-21 and Proverbs 30:17. Blessed are the
young people who have come to Jesus even when one or both parents are not
Christians.
Perhaps while reading this, God is speaking to your heart and you are
thinking that you have failed in bringing up your children in the Lord. As long as
we have breath, it is not too late to ask God’s forgiveness and start anew with Him.
I John 1:9 assures us that if we have sinned, He is faithful and just to forgive us of
Sherry S. Page Atkinson lives in Marion with her husband, Jimmy.Those wishing to contact her may do so at the following address:
6526 South Highway 41 or you may e-mail her at: sherrya@nethwy.com.
Spirit
Love by Sherry S. Page
“God is able to do exceedingly
far over and above all that we
could dare ask or think.”
Eph. 3:20.
our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. Thank God, He gives anoth-
er chance to be and do what He has called us to do. Don’t give up! “We can do
all things through Christ Who strengthens us” (Philippians 4:13). Your addiction or
problem is not too big for Him. Jesus is bigger than any problem you have. There
is unlimited power in the Name of Jesus and the enemy has to bow and flee when
the Name of Jesus is spoken. “Be subject to God, resist the devil and he will flee
from you” (James 4:7). When temptation comes, run to the presence of God
through prayer and praise. There’s freedom for you. Jesus wants to fill that void
in your life that you have tried to fill with some habitual sin and the results have
been devastating for you and your family. But, your disappointment is God’s
appointment. “Draw near to God and He will draw near to you” (James 4:8).
There is hope in the Lord Jesus Christ. What Satan intends for harm, God can turn
it around for something good as we seek Him. There is physical, emotional and
spiritual healing in the Name of Jesus. “The enemy has come to steal, kill and
destroy, but Jesus came that we might have life and have it more abundantly” (John
10:10). “God is able to do exceedingly far over and above all that we could dare
ask or think” (Ephesians 3:20).
“You are God’s workmanship and you are loved with His everlasting love”
(Jeremiah 31:3). No matter what you have done, He loves you! He has a special
purpose for your life. “For I know the thoughts and plans that I have for you, says
the Lord, thoughts and plans for welfare and peace and not for evil, to give you
hope in your final outcome” (Jeremiah 29.11). I Peter 5:7 tells us to cast all our
cares (or worries) on Him because He cares for us. Come to Jesus now if you do
not have a personal relationship with Him. He is right there waiting for you to ask
Him in your heart and life if you never have or if you would like to rededicate your
life to Him, you might pray this prayer: Dear Heavenly Father, thank You for lov-
ing me and sending Your only Son, Jesus, to die on a cruel cross for my sins. I am
sorry for my sins, Jesus, and ask You to forgive me. Come into my heart and save
me. Baptize and fill me with Your Holy Spirit. I commit my life to You. Lead me
and help me to live the Christian life in service for You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
Accept the Father’s love!
68 5/25/09 11:04 AM Page 1

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69 5/26/09 11:37 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 69

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70 5/21/09 12:39 PM Page 1

Keep sending in your photos for a special

“There She Goes” in next month’s issue!

don’t forget your She!

(left to right) Toshiko Arima, Sayumi Ikeda,

Genia Tyson, & Barbara Terry
March 2009 She Magazine

“In March, Barbara and I traveled to Kumamoto, Japan, to visit

Sayumi Ikeda. Sayumi and her husband,Yasu, lived in Florence for
five years while he worked at the Honda plant. Barbara, Sayumi,
her mother and I spent the night at the Sendo Hotel in Yufuin,
Tracie & Bill Schoen Japan. Here, we are having dinner in our Japanese Samue (two-
March 2009 She Magazine piece kimonos) provided by the hotel.” - Genia Tyson

“We took our She Magazine to Sandals Montego Bay,

Jamaica.We love She; so do the people in Jamaica.”
- Tracie and Bill Schoen

Allison Rhodes,Yvonne Rhodes,

Gina Lee & Crystal Bausmith
March 2009 She Magazine
Betty Mims, Jayne Younginer, Sandra Harrell,
Melissa Younginer Wade &Harriet Morris
March 2009 She Magazine “We took our She Magazine to New York
City for a girls’ weekend in March. We left
“She went to visit the magazine for another lucky person to
Elvis Presley’s read.” - Crystal Bausmith
Memphis home.”

To be featured in “There She Goes,” send an e-mail to editor@shemagazine.com. Include a picture of yourself
(friends welcome!) with a copy of She Magazine along with a brief description.
71 5/21/09 9:41 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 71

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72 5/25/09 11:31 AM Page 1

What do you think is the one thing that

is most often misunderstood about men?

1 Michael Woodham - Darlington

“Many women think that we’re not sensitive to their feelings, but we are.”

2 Andy Neeves - Marion

“Most men are just as sensitive and compassionate as women are on the inside,
but some rarely reveal it on the outside.”

Werner Jacob - Florence

3
“I think women don’t understand that most men feel just as passionately as
women do on certain issues; we just don’t show it.”

4 Russell Godbold - Marion

“What men are thinking about; when we say we’re thinking about nothing,
that’s what we’re thinking – NOTHING!”
73 5/21/09 9:26 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 73

Caring for Hospice

Patients in the Pee Dee
since 1979

Caring.
Comfort.
Compassion.
These three words describe the mission of MeLeod Hospice - to provide compassionate care and
support for patients with a terminal illness and their families. Patients and their loved ones need a dedicated
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74-75 5/26/09 9:22 AM Page 1

it’s raining

MEN!

Collin M. Smith
Photography

Pictured back row, left to right: Mike Weatherford, Bobby Streett, Dr. Benjamin Woods, Matt Watford, Randall Graham and Sam Mitchell
Second Row: James Baker, Brian Hyder and Charles Jeffcoat
On Floor: Steve Mace and Barry Frick
74-75 5/26/09 9:22 AM Page 2

Each June, She does an

about-face and turns the
focus to MEN! This year,
we bring you fabulous
fathers, wonderful husbands
and a few men who love
what they do –
THE DESIGNER,
THE OUTDOORSMAN,
THE CARPENTER
and THE SINGLE GUY –
just to name a few.
Turn the page to read all
about these great guys,
who so willingly
(okay, a couple had to be forced)
allowed us to look into the
sometimes-foreign
(though always interesting)
lives of men.

Feature stories begin on page 76.

Featured but not pictured: Walt Hyman, Jimmy Trussell, Ed Kowalski,

Austin Smetana, Donny Gerald, Brian Leonard and Mark Jackson
76 5/25/09 11:34 AM Page 1

it’s raining the

MEN
Baseball Player
Austin Smetana

ABOUT ME: I was born and raised in
Florence, SC, and I’ve lived here my entire life.
I have two of the best parents, Gary and
Elizabeth Smetana. I’m lucky enough to have an
older sister, Meagan, who is twenty-two. I also
have a younger brother (19), who is graduating
from West Florence High School. He has com-
mitted to USC Sumter to play baseball. As a
potential 2011 graduate from Francis Marion
University, I’m studying Sociology, focusing in
the Criminal Justice area. I’m also working on
a Minor in General Business.
MY LOVE FOR BASEBALL: I’ve loved baseball
for as long as I can remember. I think back on
the days when my father would take my broth-
er and me outside as young boys and throw
the ball to us and teach us about the game. I
began playing tee ball around the age of four
and I’ve been playing ever since. I love being on
different teams and meeting people from all
over the world. Many of your teammates
become lifelong friends that you might never
have met other than on a baseball team. On
my collegiate team, I have become friends with
one of the guys from South Africa. Besides the
game itself, meeting people is one of the things
I love most about baseball.
MY HIGH SCHOOL BASEBALL CAREER: I
played baseball at West Florence High School
and was a member of the Varsity Team for all
four years. I was All-Region all of those four
years. A couple awards I received during my
high school career included Best Defense one
year and Best Hitter another year.
MY FMU BASEBALL CAREER: I’m a member
of the Francis Marion University Patriots
Baseball Team as a redshirt freshman this year.
I have three more years at FMU. I’ve met some
truly great guys. Many will be with me until we
graduate and I’ve seen some older guys go on.
MY FLORENCE RED WOLVES CAREER:
Growing up in the Florence area, I went to the
Florence Red Wolves’ games as a young boy. I
told my father that, one day, I would be playing
for the Red Wolves. Since I chose to attend a
local college, I decided I wanted to play for my
local fans. Many college players like to travel
over the summer to play summer ball; I can do
that by playing with the Red Wolves. I also like
to play close to home, though, to allow my fam-
ily to come watch me play.
MY POSITION: I’m a Catcher/ Outfielder/
in high school and I played Outfield another
year. My senior year, I played First Base. At
FMU, I’m mostly playing Outfield.
MY INSPIRATION: One person who has
inspired me the most is my father. As a former
FMU player, he inspires me to work hard and
good things will come. He also motivates me
because I want to be better than he was. He
jokes about how good he was in college.
MY DREAM FOR THE FUTURE: My dream is
to play in the Minors and work my way up. I
plan to work hard for the things I want out of
life and be successful on and off the baseball
field.
“ I’VE LOVED
BASEBALL FOR
AS LONG AS
I CAN
REMEMBER...

”
First Baseman. I was a Catcher for two years
77 5/21/09 4:29 PM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 77

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78 5/25/09 12:31 PM Page 1
it’s raining
MEN
ENJOYING
Enjoying the sounds of our surroundings is
something my father and I have always shared,
whether it’s the thunder of a passing truck, the
chirping of a distant bird or (my favorite) the rapid
rushing of waterfalls.
My dad has had me on the water all my
life. Some of the best memories we share are on
the cold fast-flowing waters of the Chattooga
River. We wouldn’t even be in a boat, just in tubes
with the freezing water running beneath us. The
thought of it now sends chills up my spine, but I’m
not sure if it’s from thinking about the cold water
or the excitement of being back there. We spent
every summer either canoeing or tubing down the
Chattooga River and skiing on Lake Marion and
Lake Moultrie. When I was too young to be on
skis by myself, my dad would hold me with one
hand, the rope with the other hand, stand on a sin-
gle ski and let someone pull us along behind the
boat. I don’t know how my mom could stand it.
Dad had an early start on the water. He
got the name “River Rat” as a teenager for his love
of Lynches River. If time were calculated correct-
ly, I’m sure the hours Dad spent on Lynches would
add up to years – if not decades – of his life. He’s
familiar with every curve and crevice, every fallen
tree and sandy bank. The cypress knees and
“ UNLIKE LIFE, BEING ON THE WATER AND IN
ITS SURROUNDINGS IS JUST SIMPLE.
Heather is employed with She Magazine with too many job titles to mention. When she’s not working, she’s exploring the outdoors and planning new travels.
She recently earned the name Panda Bear for her wrestling role.
the
Outdoorsman
Barry Frick
- Enjoying a little father/daughter time on Lynches River
grown-up swamps mark different parts of his past.
As I pass along those same markings with him, I
wonder about what all he must have seen and
experienced on the river, even thinking further
back to what Francis Marion could have witnessed
on that same river many years ago.
Lynches River is where my dad spends
most of his time now. He and my mom live on the
river, allowing us to have the pleasures of a home
with the beauty of the forest. That home (or as we
call it, “the river house”') has become my dad’s
sanctuary, not so much the house but the environ-
ment surrounding the house. As long as the sun’s
up, he’s outside. Most nights, even after the sun has
been down for hours, you’ll find him cleaning his
boats with the help of a large spotlight. To my
father, it’s just the peacefulness of the warm sum-
mer water flowing beside him while doing any
chore that makes it less of an obligation. It’s
almost as if for one brief moment, you can escape
to a place with no worries, no time limits and no
rules. Unlike life, being on the water and in its sur-
roundings is just simple.
Dad became aware of all the privileges he
had – the perfect location, plenty of canoes and
kayaks and much knowledge of the river itself. He
decided to invite others to enjoy his beautiful
by Heather Frick
refuge. This is when River Rat’s Canoe Rentals was
introduced. Two years later, he is doing what he
loves and sharing it with others.
No matter how many times we travel
down that river – even if it’s the same stretch
we’ve seen dozens of times – we never lose inter-
est. There is always a new mystery to be discov-
ered – a new (or old) swamp pocketed deep with-
in trees never seen before or ducklings splashing in
the water behind their mother (similar to how I
paddle behind my father, consistently banging the
paddle on the side of the boat). The past two
times my father and I have gone kayaking, we saw
a Bald Eagle. Sharing that experience with my dad
has made me appreciate the wildlife that sur-
rounds me. Every trip we take leads us to some
sort of wildlife – deer, wild hogs, snakes, many birds
and beavers and reptiles. The list could go on and
on.
Finding that safe haven to share with my
dad has made me appreciate him so much more. I
know even long after he’s gone (which will be
many, many years away), I’ll always have a place to
connect with him.
“Thanks for passing on the passion, Dad.
Happy Father’s Day!” - Heather
”
79 5/26/09 10:47 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 79

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80 5/26/09 11:14 AM Page 1
it’s raining
MEN
FRESH
Fresh out of graduate school, Bennie Woods moved
to Florence to become an Instructor of Music at Francis
Marion College. Thirty-seven years later, Dr. Benjamin
Woods retired from Francis Marion University as a distin-
guished, well-loved, well-known professor. He came as a
single young man who impressed his students with his
caring attitude and his impressive talents. Those positive
attributes have not changed. However, now he has a wife
and two adult children, who also enrich his life.
Dr. Benjamin Woods earned the Doctor of Musical
Arts degree from the University of South Carolina in
Piano Performance in 1991. His wife, Dr. Sherry Woods,
has two DMA degrees from USC – one in Viola and the
other in Composition. Christopher graduated from the
Manhattan School of Music. Daughter Adrienne is a grad-
uate of the University of South Carolina.
In the intervening years, there have been innumerable
experiences and honors and concerts. Perhaps the
Woods’ proudest accomplishment, however, is evidenced
in the lives of their two children. Together, the siblings
moved to Los Angeles about eight years ago. Adrienne
and Christopher have performed in various venues. You
may have seen them in the orchestra on American Idol,
Dancing With the Stars, the MTV awards, or other tele-
vised productions. Dad says he is proudest, though, that
both of his children are independent, happy, and able to
make a living in their chosen field of work.
Not to be left out, Bennie’s mother also lives in
Florence. Until recently, the 102 year old Mrs. Woods
lived independently in her own home. She recently
moved to the Carolinian but remains much more ener-
getic than many folks who are much younger than she.
Meeting her just once will answer any questions about
where the rest of the Woods family get their momentum.
While Dr.Woods was on the faculty at Francis Marion,
he maintained a full performing schedule, as well. His
concerts have ranged from solo piano recitals at the
Coolidge Auditorium of the Library of Congress and the
Carnegie Recital Hall to faculty recitals at Francis Marion.
He has collaborated with other solo artists and with sym-
Ferebe Gasque is the Music Therapist at McLeod Hospice House, a Service Coordinator with Florence County DSN Board and an Independent Consultant with the Pampered Chef. ®
the Professor
of Music
Benjamin Woods
by Ferebe Gasque
“ THROUGHOUT ALL OF HIS
ACCOMPLISHMENTS, HE IS STILL
JUST BENNIE TO HIS FRIENDS.
” Collin M. Smith Photography
phony orchestras and small ensembles. Dr. Woods
served as Music Director and Conductor of the Florence
Symphony Orchestra from 1996 – 2002, retiring from
that position to allow him more time for piano perform-
ance, his first love. Yet he always found time to teach and
to encourage his students.
Throughout all of his accomplishments, he is still just
Bennie to his friends. Those friends range from former
students to famous people whose names are known
throughout the world. The fame and the accolades and
the rubbing shoulders with notable people, however, have
not changed the self-described homebody on the inside.
It was my privilege to be in the very first Music
Appreciation class Bennie Woods ever taught at Francis
Marion. At that time, he was a young, energetic teacher
who loved music and who wanted to share that love with
anyone who would listen. He was encouraging and per-
sonable and well-versed in all areas of music. Thirty-seven
years later, he remains energetic and continues to share
his love of music with everyone he encounters. Recently,
he and I had occasion to chat about the changes in the
thirty-seven years we have known each other. In spite of
the different paths our lives have taken, our friendship is
as though we have traveled the same roads. One of the
most endearing qualities Bennie Woods possesses (and
there are many) is his devotion to his friends.
In 1972, the only classroom buildings on campus were
Stokes Hall and the Library. Music and Art classes were
held at the old Mars Bluff School building, which had been
long since abandoned by the local public school district.
Bennie told me that he had the Hamilton upright piano in
his office at Mars Bluff because he was afraid his grand
piano would be in danger of incurring damage in that
building. (That was when I told him the story of the con-
crete truck falling into the sidewalk it was pouring outside
the Library building in 1971, thus delaying the start of the
college careers of my classmates and me for a day!) In spite
of its rather shaky beginnings in the physical plant, Francis
Marion University has grown into a beautiful campus with
academic programs that can rival many major universities.
Now that he has officially retired, Dr. Woods is look-
ing forward to more opportunities to concentrate on the
things he loves most: family, friends, and piano perform-
ance. He says that the “I’m retired” realization probably
won’t hit home until the fall. He’s so accustomed to hav-
ing the summers off, retirement so far seems normal.
With all of his commitments, however, no one has even
considered he might become bored any time soon.
When Sherry and Bennie can convince Christopher
and Adrienne to come back East, the Woods Family
Ensemble occasionally enthralls local audiences. Such will
be the case on June 12 at the Florence Little Theater. Dr.
Sherry Woods has designed a program to meet the musi-
cal interests of almost everyone.
Most of the works performed will revolve around the
theme of Fire and Water. Dr. Benjamin Woods will play a
classical Ravel piece on the piano. Son Christopher will
be featured on the violin in the Summer Concerto from
the Four Seasons, by Vivaldi. Of Fire Born, composed by
Dr. Sherry Woods, will have its world premiere at the
event. This work will highlight the talents of the four
Woods family members in addition to flute and soprano.
On the other end of the musical spectrum, Christopher
will present an original Rap called “God’s Got Your Back.”
The evening of music benefits a worthy cause. It will
be an event to remember. The Florence community is
truly blessed to have Bennie and Sherry Woods and their
children call it home. They are giving of their time and tal-
ents to support the American Red Cross. Let’s join them
in this effort.
“From Rap to Ravel” – An evening with the Woods Family
and Friends will be held on Friday night, June 12, from 8:00
PM until 10:00 PM at the Florence Little Theater on South
Dargan Street. The concert will benefit the Pee Dee
Chapter of the American Red Cross. Tickets start at $25.
There are other levels of support that are available, as well.
Tickets can be purchased through the local American Red
Cross chapter by calling 843.662.8121 or online at
http://peedee.redcross.org/content/index.html.
81 5/26/09 9:41 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 81

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82 5/25/09 10:05 AM Page 1
it’s raining
MEN
“ ...OUR
WORLD AS
WE KNEW IT
WOULD NOT
EVER BE THE
”
SAME.
ASAs I gaze toward Brian Leonard’s handsome face
these days, you may see me look his way twice – maybe
even three times. As he glances my way, we often
exchange quick smiles. I realize how fortunate I am to
have him as my partner to share this life. My heart is full
just thinking about all this.
I remember the very first time seeing him. Even
at a distance, he was a beautiful man. His face was strik-
ing then, and it was so easy to look his way. I’d find myself
looking his way again and again. There was a definite
attraction the first time I met him, and my heart knew
there was some kind of unexplainable, magnetic pull
toward this guy.
Friends introduced us back then. Shortly after
that initial introduction, we exchanged phone numbers. It
wasn’t long before we were dating, and we established
ourselves as a couple. After dating for two years, we both
knew that the call for a more serious relationship exist-
ed. It was time for marriage.
We’re often told that how a guy treats us when
we’re dating pretty much follows suit into the marital
relationship. I will admit that is true in our case. Our love
and respect continued to grow as time passed and as the
relationship status changed from being single to being
married. I could tell when I met Brian that he was a gen-
uinely-kind person. He treated me like I was special. He
treated our relationship as a special one. He opened the
car door for me then. He spent quality time with me
then. He gave special-occasion gifts then. He displayed
courteous manners.
One thing about this man is that those respect-
ful qualities and well-mannered ways are still with him.
Those traits still exist as we move into the seasons of
2009, the year in which we will celebrate our twenty-fifth
Janet and Brian Leonard live in Florence. They have three children – Katherine, Kelly and Christopher.
the Forester,
the Survivor
Brian Leonard
anniversary (in July). After all these years, he still acts the
same toward us and treats our relationship with uncon-
ditional love and respect. Even now, he’s known to open
a door for me. He is a giver of gifts such as perfume, jew-
elry, garden-fresh flowers and even bouquets of roses. He
vacuums, washes dishes and does laundry.
Okay, I know what you’re thinking! “What do
you do, Janet?” Yes, I help with all these repetitive house-
hold chores, too. Because we both work outside the
home as a forester and a second-grade teacher, we assist
each other to balance the upkeep of our home. Here’s
the icing on the cake! As we sit on the couch to share
the day’s events, he often plays with my hair or massages
my feet. What a great treat at the end of a long workday!
He’s a great husband, lover and friend to me. He’s the
wonderful father of our three children, ages 22, 20 and 12.
He’s an awesome provider for us as he’s always looking
out to meet our varying family needs. He’s there for us
all the time.
As a Region Manager for Southeast Woodland
Services, Brian is responsible for arranging and overseeing
services for forestry consultants, private and industrial
forest landowners and utility companies. The services
include reforestation and forestry and right-of-way herbi-
cide application. With this job, Brian has the opportunity
to travel throughout the states of North and South
Carolina. He gets to spend most of his time outdoors in
natural settings helping landowners manage property. He
isn’t confined to an office as he interacts with people and
nature. Brian enjoys the flexibility in his work as a
forester. When Brian started with forestry classes in col-
lege, he knew that this field of study was what he wished
to pursue. He received his degree from the University of
New Hampshire in 1978.
by Janet Tanner Leonard
Collin M. Smith
Photography
Everything for us seemed perfectly aligned in
order of how life was supposed to be. We had each
other. We had successful jobs, healthy children and a nice
house. We had a loving home. One snowy day, January
23, 2003, changed the perfect alignment. Brian had a doc-
tor’s appointment scheduled on that wintry-mixed morn-
ing; I went with him to get his test results. When the doc-
tor passed one of two reports from his hands to ours, he
spoke gently, “Brian, you have prostate cancer. Based on
our findings, I recommend that you have surgery within
the next couple of weeks.”
Needless to say, our world as we knew it would
not ever be the same. We had to learn to adapt to hav-
ing new perspectives as a couple. It was definitely a time
of redefining relationships.
The surgery, with a few complications, was suc-
cessful. For the past six years, Brian’s check-ups have indi-
cated that he is cancer-free. Yes! Every check-up for his
health status is nerve-racking; yet, those questionable
experiences have deepened my faith and strengthened my
gratitude. My prayer life is consistent, often expressed in
appreciation for the little things.
There is much to express gratitude for. What
about the doctor’s recommendation for that second
biopsy, the actual test which informed us about Brian’s
problem? Hmm, I’m so thankful that test was ordered.
What about the successful surgery? Ah, I’m grateful for
that success. What about these last six years of cancer-
free check-ups? Yes, I am grateful and forever will be.
As I look at my husband’s striking face these days
and share our quick smiles, it strikes a chord deep within
my heart. Yes, my heart is filled and is overflowing with
love and respect for this beautiful man.
83 5/22/09 3:41 PM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 83

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84 5/25/09 12:33 PM Page 1
it’s raining
MEN
AS
As an adolescent, I drew well and I drew often.
I’ve also always been interested in design at most any
level. In high school, I was taught by a woman named
Sheila Cape. She was a woman small in stature yet
gigantic in her passion for art and teaching art. She
pushed us to explore our interests and that is when I
discovered a place with art and design. I began my stud-
ies in a small community college and continued on to
earn a Bachelor of Fine Arts and a Master of Fine Arts
in Graphic Design.
My career in teaching is an interesting tale. In
early 2000, I was forking for an ad firm and, in the midst,
was asked to teach a senior level design class at the
University of South Alabama in Mobile. I’m a relational
person by nature, so this was an immediate fit. Later,
the agency came into financial difficulty and I was laid off
– the best thing that ever happened to me. Being laid
off forced me to explore and ask hard questions of
myself. At the same time, the University lost some fac-
ulty and I was able to teach three classes a semester as
an adjunct, as well as start a freelance design business.
I must say that all these thing culminate in the
fact that I truly love what I do. In this, I feel privileged
because I may be in the minority here. For me, there is
no better place than the creative exploration design
allows and, in turn, teaching those ideas and skill to
future designers.
JOB TITLE AT FMU: My professional life is a bit dual in
the sense that I teach, as well as design on a profession-
al basis. Therefore, every answer comes from several
angles. I was hired in 2006 as an Assistant Professor of
Visual Communication. I tend to interchange the terms
“Visual Communication” and “Graphic Design.” The
field of Graphic Design is evolving and has grown to
encompass many things that are not merely graphic. As
the definition changed, so has the thing we are defining,
Charles Jeffcoat and his wife, Uschi, live in Florence with their two sons, Charles and Philip. To learn more about his work visit www.charlesjeffcoat.com.
the Designer
Charles Jeffcoat
thus we have Visual Communication. The second part
of my title includes my research and ongoing work. I am
also the Principal for a lucrative freelance design firm.
We specialize in brand identity, print, web and most any
aspect of design.
WHAT BEING A DESIGNER MEANS TO ME: I cannot
look at anything without looking at the design of it all.
I believe design is at the heart of all things. A designer
is a creative problem solver. Each concept begins with
a problem – communicate this message, sell this prod-
uct, give face to this company or group. I work to find
the best solution and strategy for the problem and,
from there, the concept and message behind it. When
asked what I design, the answer is, “Everything!” There
is an eye and an ideology that is or becomes ingrained
in every professional designer. The short answer is
logos and identity packages, brochures, packaging,
advertising, web and interactive communication, signage
and way-finding, interior and spacial theme and design,
etc. A short list of clients include: The National Civil
Rights Museum, Art Museum of the University of
Memphis, Movie Gallery, Sony Music, Universal Records,
Warner Music, The Florence Symphony Orchestra,
Francis Marion University and others. I have also had
the privilege of donating my time and design work to
several charitable organizations including St Jude
Children’s Research Hospital and the National Civil
Rights Museum.
WHAT I ENJOY MOST ABOUT MY WORK AND
TALENT: This answer serves, as I do, a dual purpose.
From a teaching standpoint, I hope to inspire my stu-
dents to higher levels. The field of design is flooded
with creative and talented people and it’s hard to work
in this field. I love seeing my students succeed, whether
it’s in the classroom or in the professional world.
Collin M. Smith
Photography
Professionally, I enjoy design on the whole. It’s in my
nature and I love to create. I have a saying (I’m sure it
comes from some other source), “Design is not art;
good design is.” I don’t consider what I do to be fine
art, but there is a connection. I’m a doodler, a sketch-
er, an illustrator, a painter, etc. So, when someone asks
if I’m an artist, for all intents and purposes, I am. Mostly,
however, I enjoy designing something that meets the
standard of the previous quote. To make something
that works – and works well – thereby crossing the line
from design to art – this is what I love.
WHAT SPARKS MY CREATIVITY: Many things – the
world, nature, architecture (I am a big fan), my children,
my wife, the work of others – all these spark my cre-
ativity. For me, it’s soothing to spend time feeding the
creative mind by looking at the works of others – not
to copy, but to inspire. Ahhh! Then, there’s that little
moment when a little sketch, a spark, catches hold of an
idea and is fanned into a flame. I love to see the out-
come! I take a step back and see something I’m proud
of.
WHAT BRINGS ME THE MOST JOY: I get joy from
both the process and the outcome. The process is a
great piece of the puzzle, asking those questions of who,
what, where, when and why. This is about the journey,
not the destination. As I mentioned before, I suppose I
get the most joy from seeing something I created on
display – whether it’s on the web, the wall or the page.
It may seem insignificant to some, but from time-to-
time, I design those little “bonus” stickers you see on a
CD package. I still get quite excited when I see them
on the cellophane, even though I know they just get
ripped off and thrown away. Nevertheless, I know that
thousands were printed and thousands were seen and
hopefully enjoyed by the consumer.
85 5/25/09 9:20 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 85

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86 5/25/09 11:12 AM Page 1

it’s raining
MEN the Chef
Ed Kowalski by Ferebe Gasque

EDEd Kowalski is somewhat of a Renaissance Man. He was
born and reared in Long Island, New York. After receiving his MS in
Chemistry from the University of Mississippi Medical Center, he
eventually moved to Florence in 1986 to work with Dr. Loren Mason
as Director of the Carolina Arthroscopy and Knee Institute. Later,
Ed was employed by Carolinas Hospital System until his retirement
in 2008. However, his talents are not confined to the medical field.
He plays the piano, has a special affection for chocolate labs, and loves
to cook.
According to Ed, cooking has been a lifetime of learning, trial
and error, and experience in all the things he holds dear. He started
at his mother’s knee, asking her to show him every little step in her
cooking processes. He says his mom was a great cook, as was her
mother. Chef Kowalski furthered his culinary education in France in
the early 1960s. He also studied with New Orleans chefs and in
other venues, as well.
He has owned and operated several restaurants and facilities.
He now runs a catering business in the Florence area. He is avail-
able for small and large dinner parties and for other gastronomical
opportunities. Ed Kowalski welcomes your interest in his expertise.
He can be contacted at home in Florence at 843.661.7657.
Ed is an interesting man with a wide variety of interests.
Talking with him briefly, however, makes it evident that he loves cook-
ing. He especially likes cooking with fresh herbs. Herbs, he informs
eager learners, have been used in the preparation of foods, medicines,
and beauty products for over five thousand years. Whether it is the
seed, the foliage, or the flowers being used, these wonderful additions
to the world of food have enhanced the smells, flavors, and tastes for
millennia.
When asked to share a recipe, Ed initially had difficulty decid-
ing which one. However, he said that in spring and summer, people
often are looking for lighter meals. So he chose a delicious recipe
that is appropriate for this time of year.
C. Wilson Studios
photography by
Grilled Salmon with Herbs
4 – six to eight ounce fresh salmon steaks or fillets (steaks are juicier –
also, wild caught Alaskan salmon is best)
1 cup fresh orange juice
1/4 cup light brown sugar or honey
1/8 cup Kikoman soy sauce
2 Tablespoons fresh chopped garlic
2 Tablespoons fresh chopped parsley
4 Tablespoons fresh chopped dill
1 teaspoon sesame oil
1/4 cup chopped green onion
1/4 cup olive oil
Mix all ingredients together (except for the salmon) and let stand for
thirty minutes at room temperature. Next, add the salmon and let marinate for
an additional thirty minutes. After this, the fish may be grilled or baked in the
oven. If you choose to grill, you will get an awesome caramel effect from the
orange juice and sugars. If you want to “walk the plank” (fish baked on a soaked
piece of wood to flavor the fish – applewood or mesquite is best), just remem-
ber to follow the directions and soak the plank over night so it won’t burn in
the oven! Also, you can boil down the marinade to syrup and pour a little over
your creation. If baking the fish, preheat your oven to 350° and cook for 8 – 10
minutes (or until the fish flakes with a fork). Of course, the cooking time will
vary in the oven as well as on the grill, depending on the size of the steaks or
fillets.
This dish is really good served with couscous and a salad. Also, a nice-
ly chilled bottle of New Zealand Sauvignon Blanc (which is crisp, clean, and
refreshing) puts an elegant and tasty exclamation to the meal.
Good cooking and good eating!

Ferebe Gasque is the Music Therapist at McLeod Hospice House, a Service Coordinator with Florence County DSN Board and an Independent Consultant with the Pampered Chef.®
87 5/25/09 9:45 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 87

Considering
Cosmetic Surgery?
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Gerald F. Conner, MD
Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery

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88 5/22/09 9:45 AM Page 1
it’s raining
MEN
“ THIS STORY IS ABOUT A CARPENTER’S PASSION THAT HAS
COME TO LIFE IN THE FORM OF A WOODEN TRUNK.
THIS
This story is about a carpenter’s passion that
has come to life in the form of a wooden trunk. My
father is James Baker of Dillon. He is a retired Chief
Petty Officer from the U.S. Navy who has done car-
pentry work on a part-time basis since his retirement
in 1970. He learned about the carpentry trade dur-
ing the twenty-four years he served in the Navy. He
started acquiring his carpentry skills by hanging out
in wood shops that were located on various naval
bases where he was stationed. Along with his navy
friends, he used to build model kit boats, as well as
repair real ones. He’s helped his friends remodel var-
ious rooms in their homes, particularly kitchens. It
was through this type of work that he began to use
his own skills, which would help him in his carpentry
work and in designing his trunk.
He got the idea of building a wooden trunk
after he purchased what he thought was an antique
trunk in Crescent City, Florida. However, when he
brought the trunk home, he found that the wood was
deteriorating. After he bought the ruined item, he
Theresa B. Rogers is the Food Service Director with Latta Schools. She has been with the district for about ten years. James Baker and his wife,Vivian Carol Oates Baker, live in Dillon.
They have three children, four grandchildren and one great-grandchild. They will be approaching their 50th wedding anniversary in December. James retired from the Navy in November 1970
and was a District Supervisor of nineteen stores for the Fast Fair Convenient Stores in Dillon, Marlboro, Horry County and Myrtle Beach Area. After retiring in 1975 from his position with the
convenient store chains, he began working with his woodwork projects.
the Carpenter
James Baker
decided to build his own from scratch. He began
gathering the poplar wood that acts as the material
base for his latest craft. He traded wooden parts
with others, collected spare pallets from lumber busi-
nesses and ordered parts from a location out of
state. After many hours of hard work and determi-
nation, his trunk was completed. He gave his master-
piece to his first grandson.
In addition to this accomplishment, he has
made several trunks for people in the community and
entered a trunk in a woodwork competition for the
Senior Ministry Division for the Dillon Church of
God. He won the State Division in woodwork and
represented South Carolina in a national competition
in 2008. He enjoyed it so much that he began on a
new project for 2009’s competition, which was held
in Mauldin, South Carolina, in March. His hard work
paid off because he brought the winning trophy home
for this division. Then, he traveled to the national
competition, which was held in Gatlinburg,
Tennessee, this April.
by Theresa B. Rogers
Collin M. Smith
Photography
”
This beautiful wooden trunk is lined with
cedar on the inside and ornately handcrafted with
attractive accented pieces on the top and sides. His
work is something we are proud of. He has made
trunks for each of his grandchildren. Due to declin-
ing health and arthritis, however, it is difficult for him
to work at what he loves the most. With the help of
my oldest brother, he is currently building his final
trunk for his great-granddaughter.
This story is not just about a man that has a
talent at the age of 78; it’s about a man that I admire
for his strength, his courage and a man that I am
proud to call Daddy. I am thankful for the love that
he has shown me. His support to his family is never-
ending. His genuine words of wisdom penetrate our
hearts and minds that will last us a lifetime.
“Daddy, you gave me the confidence to be the
woman I am today. I am proud of you. I love you and I
thank you for the legacy of love and compassion that you
have given to each of us.” - Theresa
89 5/21/09 9:47 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 89

214 Second Loop Road • Florence, SC

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90 5/25/09 12:34 PM Page 1
it’s raining
MEN
AS
I started working twelve-hour shifts in 1996 at
Wellman in Darlington. I worked there for fourteen
months and then transferred with them to Mississippi for
a plant start-up. I worked two years, straight days, and
then accepted another rotating-shift position. It didn’t
take long to remember how ill and short-tempered I
became on nightshift. The irritability and moodiness
began shortly after starting back on nights. If I hadn’t
gone from shift work to straight days and back to shift
work, I may not have realized what was causing the
moodiness. I was a completely different person on nights.
I realized I needed to find a way to manage shift work a
little better. What I needed was complete daytime
darkness.
At the end of 2000, my family
moved back to South Carolina with
Progress Energy. I was still working
twelve-hour rotating shifts. I tried all
the usual things such as putting tin
foil, black plastic and blankets over
my bedroom windows. Nothing
“ NOTHING
WORKED THE
WAY I WANTED...
I KNEW THERE
HAD TO BE A
worked the way I wanted. Nothing
was dark enough. I knew there had to be
BETTER WAY.
a better way.
My brother gave me a golf net for my
birthday. As I was putting it together, the concept of
ShiftShade came to me. The rods that were used for the
golf net were very flexible and I thought there should be
some way to support something in the window to block
out the sun using these rods. A design idea popped into
my head and I went inside and put it on paper.
After sitting on the idea for a couple months, I
pulled out the drawing and showed it to a co-worker
who encouraged me to move forward with the idea. I
ordered some tent replacement rods and went to a fab-
ric store and asked for their darkest fabric. After talking
with the attendant, she introduced me to blackout fabric.
Matt Watford and his wife, Nikki, live in Lamar, SC. Besides ShiftShade, Matt also works full-time as a Control Operator for Progress Energy in Hartsville, SC. Nikki is a
Registered Nurse at McLeod Regional Medical Center. They have three children, Jace (8), Ella (6) and Adyn (21-months) and are members of Cornerstone Baptist Church.
the Inventor
“Shiftshade”
Matt Watford
Collin M. Smith
Photography
I started playing with the rods and fabric and was amazed
at the results. My idea really worked! At the time, I only
had one window in my bedroom, so it only took one pro-
totype to get the full effect. Everyone was amazed at how
dark the room was in the middle of the day. You literally
could not see your hand in front of your face. Of course,
I couldn’t wait for my next nightshift.
My problem with sleeping during the day was
not falling asleep but waking up after a couple of hours
and not being able to go back to sleep. The eyelids only
block out 80% of light; ShiftShade takes care of the rest!
The total daytime darkness really helped. It fooled my
body into thinking it was night and allowed me to get
several hours more sleep per day.
I started thinking about selling my
product. A good friend of mine came up
with the name of ShiftShade.
Afterwards, I went to
attorney/friend who told me the
an
story of his uncle having an idea for a
golf swing gizmo. The uncle did noth-
ing with his idea and later saw his inven-
”
tion being sold on TV. He then recom-
mended a Patent Attorney in Greenville.
During this time, I was constantly playing with
the design, looking for suppliers, getting a website set up
and talking with anyone that might help me. The patent
attorney told me about SCORE (Counselors to America’s
Small Business). What a great piece of advice! Hartsville
has a SCORE Chapter and I met with four of the coun-
selors who are retired professionals that volunteer their
time to help small businesses get started. (SCORE is a
free service and I highly recommend them,
www.score.org.) One of the counselors has been my
sounding board for the entire process. SCORE, friends
and family have all been instrumental in helping me in the
development and growth of ShiftShade.
It’s very gratifying seeing the company grow
from an idea I had, but the real glory goes to my Lord and
Savior, Jesus Christ. As my relationship with God grows,
I can see Him working through me and ShiftShade. I’m
not sure what His plans are, but I’m very excited!
WHAT IS THE SHIFTSHADE: The ShiftShade is simply a
shade that blocks out all the sunlight from entering
through your window.
PROCESS FOR MANUFACTURING THE SHIFTSHADE:
All the components that make up a ShiftShade are made
in the USA. Up until June 2008, I was the manufacturer,
shipper and salesman. A friend that had been through a
similar business start-up advised me that I could not con-
tinue doing it all. He recommended Direct Market
Access in Tabor City, NC, to handle the assembly and
shipping. I still do all the special-order shades, but all the
standard shades are assembled and shipped from Tabor
City.
SHIFTSHADE’S GROWTH: At first, 90% of the sales
came from eBay and 10% from the website. As the name
has gotten out and the website has improved, the per-
centage has changed to the majority of sales coming from
the website. To my surprise, women have been the main
buyers – women that work nights (nurses), women who
have husbands working nights or who have small children
that need to sleep later or take longer naps during the
day.
HOW/WHERE TO PURCHASE A SHIFTSHADE:
Website www.shiftshade.com; toll-free telephone num-
ber, 1-866-690-2538 between the hours of 9 AM and 4
PM Monday through Friday; Bigs Meats and More in
McBee, SC (behind McLeod Farms on highway 151); eBay
91 5/21/09 9:59 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 91

Florence
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92 5/25/09 12:35 PM Page 1
it’s raining
MEN
Collin M. Smith
Photography
II married a ROCKER! The first time I met my
husband, Mike, his hair was longer than mine. For our
first date, he showed up in a Van Halen T-shirt, sweat
bands and holes in his jeans. My oldest brother’s
response was a simple, “You’re not going anywhere with
that rock and roller!”
I guess the old saying that opposites attract is
true. It still amazes us after all these years that Mike and
I ended up together. As for me, I was a traditional south-
ern Baptist, raised singing hymns and Bill Gaither. My
childhood consisted of albums by Johnny Cash, Charlie
Pride,Tammy Wynette and Loretta Lynn. We were even
known to make the trip to the “Country Mecca” of
Nashville – the ultimate in entertainment, right?
As I became a teenager and began to broaden
my musical horizons, my album collection expanded to
include Andy Gibb, Air Supply, Shaun Cassidy and Leif
Garrett. (Anybody else remember those? Believe it or
not, I still have most of those albums.) When I really
went wild, I listened to REO Speedwagon, John Cougar
Mellencamp and Huey Lewis and the News. I have to
admit; I did attend a Def Leppard concert once but only
because the guy I was dating wanted to go. I hated it!
As for my husband, it was Journey, Boston,
AC/DC (you get the picture). For him and his best
buddy, Jimmy, the louder the better. Lyrics weren’t really
pertinent; it was all about the music.
One of my funniest memories of music was
“ As for my husband, it was Journey, Boston, AC/DC
(you get the picture).
Linda H.Weatherford and her husband, Mike, live outside of Hartsville in the Oates Community. They have two teenage boys, Robbie and Jordan. Linda is the Director of Marketing and Business Development
with SPC Cooperative Credit Union. Mike is one (of many) who serves in the worship ministry at Cornerstone Baptist Church on a volunteer basis under the direction of Cindy Hewitt, Cornerstone’s Worship
Leader. He is currently the Praise Team Leader for the High School Youth Worship Ministry at Cornerstone (again, on a volunteer basis). His real job is at ESAB, where he has been employed for 22 years.
the Rocker
Mike Weatherford
when my husband was teaching our two young boys to
listen to his “rock and roll.” Oh, I was outnumbered and
knew that my life would be filled with countless days of
loud, head-banging music. I had to do something! On a
weekend when Mike was away, I ran across a DVD of the
movie, Grease, and brought it home for the boys to
watch. To my surprise, they loved it – especially the
music. We watched it over and over again, singing togeth-
er,“Hopelessly Devoted” and “Born to Hand Jive.” When
Mike returned, I quickly prompted the guys to share with
daddy the new music they had learned. When they broke
into “Grease is the word . . . ,” well, you can imagine his
reaction. To him, it was the sound of nails on a chalk-
board. Though I haven’t had a lot of other successes, I
can say that my boys still like Grease.
So, how in the world did we end up together?
As I look back over the past twenty-three and a half
years, I stand amazed at how God used music (regardless
of the style) to bring us together and keep us together.
As we grew in our relationship with each other and with
God, He began to use music as a way to keep us connect-
ed and dependent on each other. Our music library now
holds volumes of praise and worship, including Chris
Tomlin, Casting Crowns, Big Daddy Weave, Hillsong and
countless more. This collection is one that we both love
and share a passion for.
We now have the privilege of worshiping week-
to-week together with our family at Cornerstone Baptist
”
by Linda H. Weatherford
Church, where God blesses and grows us continually in
our worship of Him. As a family, we are beyond grateful
for the chance to share what God has given us in a way
that brings us joy and brings Him glory.
Want to know how amazing our God is? Need
a reminder that God cares about even the smallest desire
of your heart? God has made a place for my rocker at
Cornerstone to use his gifts – yes, rockin’ it out – all to the
glory of God. How I thank God for our worship leaders
who saw something in my husband and allowed him to be
who God made him to be. He is proud to be labeled
Cornerstone’s “resident rocker” and is continually
amazed at God’s blessing in his life.
As for me, I can say that I am the luckiest one of
all. Not everyone can say they are married to a “smokin’
hot rocker.” While he can rock the house, he is also the
most loyal, genuine and sentimental person I know. I
thank God for the blessing of him in my life every day.
So, I guess you’ve figured out by now that we did
make it on that first date, despite my brother’s objection.
(And, just for the record, Mike says he still wonders if my
brother likes him yet.)
Mike is proof that we are made uniquely by our
Creator and as long as God allows, we will “rock it out”
with music to His glory. Then, one day, we’ll just rock
together and reflect on the wonder and grace of our
Heavenly Father.
93 5/21/09 10:02 AM Page 1

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94-95 5/26/09 9:25 AM Page 1
it’s raining
MEN
DonnyGerald
REMEMBERING DADDY
the residents of the City of Marion and
countless individuals of all walks of
life knew him as Mayor; however, to his only son, Donny,
Bobby Gerald was simply, Daddy. To say that Donny had
a close relationship with his father would be a gross
understatement. The love, admiration and respect that
existed between this father and son are the kind that par-
ents hope for and every child dreams about.
Donny’s mind is fertile with images and memo-
ries of his daddy. Before he was old enough to drive,
Bobby would let his son drive on the dirt road leading to
the pond where they would fish. Donny explained that
his daddy was more into “catching” fish than “going fish-
ing.” “If he didn’t get a fish on the first cast, it was time
to go. The fish were just not biting that day.” Bobby
Gerald may have been an impatient fisherman, but when
it came to loving his son and his family, he emptied him-
self completely.
Bobby Gerald was by all accounts a self-made
man. He began working in the car business when he was
sixteen-years-old. Donny remembers his daddy saying
that he worked “eight days a week” and it was that atti-
tude and work ethic that paved the way for him to later
purchase a Ford Dealership that would prosper for years
to come.
Donny grew up idolizing his father and that
admiration would eventually lead him to following in his
footsteps. While he worked at his daddy’s dealership dur-
ing his high school years, Donny never thought he want-
ed a career in the automotive industry. In fact, he want-
ed to be SLED Agent. However, in 1996, Bobby helped
his son get started in the car rental business just down
the road from his dealership. In 1998, with his daddy’s
help, Donny opened a used car business which remains
successful today. “I owe everything to him for molding
me into the person I am today,” Donny explains.
Growing up, Donny recalls doing television com-
mercials for Bobby Gerald Ford, Lincoln, Mercury, which
was a “big deal” to the young son who was eager to do
anything to make his daddy proud. Donny laughs as he
remembers how his daddy’s friends would ask him,“What
do you do to a Chevy?” to hear him say, “Burn them!”
Along the way, Donny learned many lessons
from Bobby, who made a name for himself as a brilliant
businessman. Donny knew his daddy’s advice was some-
thing that he could depend on because “there was nothing
[he] will ever experience in the car business that [his]
daddy hadn’t already been through – the good and the
bad.”
Bobby also often reminded his son that he still
had a lot to learn saying, “I taught you everything you
know but not everything I know.” He advised Donny to
treat his customers with respect, explaining that in a small
community, he would have to depend on a lot of repeat
business. “To this day, I sell to a lot of his customers;
some of whom are not driving Fords, Lincolns or
Mercurys,” Donny smiles.
Though they were always very
I WOULD OFTEN
“
close, the father and son grew even
closer when Donny started his WAKE UP IN THE
own business and decided to MIDDLE OF THE
remain in Marion. A day didn’t go NIGHT AND THINK
by without Donny seeing his
THE WORST AND
daddy. In fact, Donny can see
Bobby’s office from his own office
CALL TO HEAR HIS
window. “I was always in and out of VOICE. I MISS HIM
his office everyday. I never could start SO MUCH.
my day without calling to hear his voice or
speaking to someone to see if they had seen him
yet. I would often wake up in the middle of the night and
think the worst and call to hear his voice. I miss him so
much,” Donny told me, with a pain that I so easily recog-
nize having lost my own dear daddy just months ago.
With an exuberant dedication to his work and
the city he ran as Mayor, I assumed there must have been
times when Mayor Gerald could not be there for his fam-
ily and wondered how Donny felt about sharing his daddy
with an entire city. The thing that struck me is that while
he was not able to give his son one-hundred percent of
his time, he certainly gave him all of his love. Donny knew
that his daddy loved him unconditionally and that he if
needed him, nothing would ever keep him from coming
to his side. “With all the responsibilities my daddy had,
with owning and running a car dealership and his dedica-
tion to the City of Marion, he was not able to attend all
of our functions throughout school, but he made up for
most of them.”
Bobby was not much for traveling and did not
want to leave the city. Donny says his daddy didn’t think
the city could operate without him and, furthermore, felt
“if you can’t get it in Marion, you don’t need it.”
To prove his point about how much of a
by Melia Flowers Berry
“Marionite” his daddy was, Donny tells this story. “A few
years ago, while in Greenville, we drove past the BI-LO
Center and my daddy said,‘Son, I’ve never seen a grocery
store that big!’ I said,‘Daddy, that’s an arena that they call
the BI-LO Center.’ It was time to get him back to the city
limits of Marion.”
Now, Donny finds himself following in Bobby’s
footsteps as he, too, works very long hours and is pulled
in many directions. Though Donny understands his
daddy’s devotion to his work and the people who
elected him to public office for six terms,
he wants to make sure he remembers
what is important in life. “With a
wife and a two-year-old, I know
that I must stop and think what’s
important in my life. Work’s not
everything. As Daddy got older,
he realized it, too.”
Though the business of poli-
tics was sometimes hard on the
Gerald family, Donny knew that it was
”
in his father’s blood and he loved it.
Donny summed up his daddy’s thoughts about
his obligation to Marion’s residents, “My daddy enjoyed
helping people and getting things done. He was a hands-
on mayor on an everyday basis. Though the position was
part-time, my daddy chose to make it full-time. He would
make a stand on a position saying, ‘You are not going to
make everyone happy, but you have to do what you think
is right.’”
Sadly, those closest to Mayor Bobby Gerald
wonder how much of a role his dedication to the city that
he loved may have played in his failing health over the last
year. Stress and long hours at work, coupled with dia-
betes and a heart condition finally took its toll on the
Mayor when he suffered a heart attack in mid March just
three weeks prior to the mayoral election where he
sought re-election for a sixth term.
Donny recalls how he felt upon learning his
daddy had been hospitalized, “When my mom called me
that morning, I rushed to the hospital to see him. I knew
it was serious and I was so scared. I talked to him the
night before and he seemed fine. He was telling me about
the city party that night and told me some names of peo-
ple that wanted yard signs to be put up in their yards for
the election.” (continued next page.)
94-95 5/26/09 9:26 AM Page 2

Sadly, for the first time in almost twenty-four years,

Pictures: Right - Donny Gerald holding his
daughter, Ella Grace, at a signpost marking
BOBBY GERALD PARKWAY, which was named
after his father, Mayor Bobby Gerald, in 2002
Below: Father and son enjoying a moment together
Bobby Gerald’s name would not be on the ballot for re-
election in the City of Marion Mayoral race. On March 22,
2009, Bobby’s work on earth was done and he was called to
his eternal home.
Although it is still so painful to talk about, Donny
shared what happened the moments after. “When he
passed that day, I was wondering if I should go back and sit
with him. I went back with the Pastor and I sat beside him
and was glad I did. He was resting and at peace. By then,
my mother and sisters came back, also, and we talked and
cried and all agreed that he looked so much more relaxed
and at peace.”
Mayor Bobby Gerald’s funeral was a tribute to the
man, the public servant and the father. Donny believes his
daddy would have been proud and he found comfort in the
overwhelming display of love and respect for his father. “So
many hundreds of people came to the visitation and funer-
al. My daddy must have been proud. Many people told their
stories of how my daddy helped them in some way. I enjoy
hearing those stories. We really didn’t have any funeral
plans, so we just talked it over and went with what we
thought he would like – a little humor and a lot of tears. He
deserved it.”
It has been over two months since Donny lost his
father. He stills feels as if he is on an emotional rollercoaster.
“Everyday, I feel like I’m in a dream. I look at his office or
go sit beside his grave and just talk. I miss seeing his red F-
150 pull up to come see my daughter. Sometimes, he would
knock on the door and if I told him that she wasn’t there,
he would leave! He enjoyed having a grandbaby just around
the corner. Though I wish he could have stayed with us
longer, I am thankful that he was able to see me and my sis-
ters grow up and have our own families. I know that was
important to him.”
Donny finds comfort in knowing that his daddy
knew how much he loved him. He vows to continue to
honor his larger-than-life father by remembering the lessons
he taught him and taking on his role as head of the family.
He knows his daddy would expect him to take care of
everyone and he plans to do just that.
Knowing the pain of losing a father that I loved so
dearly, I know that it is that very love that will sustain Donny
throughout the weeks and months to come. It is tough
when you love someone so deeply and were loved by them
the same. However, the joy and blessings of having known
a love like that far outweigh the pain of the loss. I know it
is hard to see it that way when you are in the middle of “the
dark night of the soul,” as I wrote about in a recent editori-
al after my daddy’s death; however, little by little, the same
love that breaks your heart will also heal it.

Editor’s Note: “Donny Gerald and his wife, Paige; his

mother, Frances; and sisters, Kim and Sonya, wish to
thank Marion County EMS, Marion Medical Center
and Carolinas Hospital System and the staff who took
care of Mayor Gerald during his illness. The care they
gave him and the kindness the family was shown will
never be forgotten.” - Melia Flowers Berry

photo by Jessica Moore

96 5/26/09 9:44 AM Page 1
it’s raining
MEN
I MET MARK
I met Mark at the University of Georgia when I
was a freshman. He was a cute senior who happened to
sit near me in the UGA Symphony Orchestra. From the
back of the viola section, I could see him with his cello
and how easily he laughed with his friends. We became
friends and eventually started dating the following year.
He was very involved in music at UGA, not only
as a cellist but as a member of the Redcoat Marching
Band and a teacher in the Suzuki Pre-College program.
He was also an officer in Phi Mu Alpha, the music frater-
nity for men. He graduated with his Music Education
Degree seven months after we started dating and began
looking for a job. Of all places, he ended up teaching at
South Florence High School! So, there I was in Athens
and he had moved to my hometown! He made the most
of his first year, even joining the Florence Symphony
Orchestra. They were short on bass players that year, so
he and my younger brother (also a cellist) picked up bass-
es and played the season with the Symphony.
Luckily for me, he moved back to Georgia to
teach the following year and was there until we married
in 1998. We both taught in Cobb County as orchestra
teachers. He was at a middle school and managed to
triple the size of the program in three years and send sev-
eral students to Honors Orchestra and All-State
Orchestra. He even performed in the school talent show
with a student. The student played an original composi-
tion on electric guitar and he backed him up on bass gui-
tar, complete with long black wig and sunglasses.
After the birth of our first daughter, we moved
back to Florence. Ten years later, he was back teaching at
South Florence High School. He teaches in the morning
at Southside and the afternoon at South Florence. His
program has grown and he has even started a guitar cur-
riculum at the high school. Next year, the middle school
Barrett Mills Jackson and her husband, Mark, live in Florence. They have two daughters, Snowden (19 months) and Ridgely (4).
the Musician
Mark Jackson
will also be offering guitar and if the growth continues, he
will end up creating another music position.
When we moved back to Florence, he promptly
rejoined the Symphony and began playing with the
Redmond String Quartet and subbing with the Firenze
Quartet when they needed a cellist. He was approached
by the music coordinator for the district and is now the
Assistant Conductor for the Youth Symphony. We are
both very active in our church We are both very active in
our church, St. Luke Lutheran Church, and Mark was
somehow convinced to direct the Handbell Choir -
which he has done for the past two years and loves every
minute of it! There have even been some Sundays that
we played our string instruments and in the same service,
he directed the bell choir. He is a DOME (District One’s
Musically Exceptional) teacher and leads classes in the
summer camp they hold every year in June. He has also
had numerous students attend honors and all-state
orchestras.
To me, however, the thing that makes him a won-
derful musician is his love of teaching. He will do almost
anything to inspire a child to continue with music. He
has loaned instruments, rewritten music, given lessons
and rides home to make sure his children can excel in his
class and as musicians. He makes sure they have oppor-
tunities to play for the community and in different venues,
as well as opportunities to hear other groups play. His
extra symphony ticket always goes to one of his students
and they and their parents repay him with glowing com-
ments at concerts and wonderful attendance. The par-
ents and students eagerly support their one fundraising
opportunity each year – a bake sale during the lunch peri-
od – and raise over a $1000.00 each year. He is even
helping teach our four-year-old violin. She loves to see
her daddy try to play her one-sixteenth size violin!
by Barrett Mills Jackson
Mark’s favorite thing about music is the ability to
span all ages and ability levels. He gets to start children
out in orchestra classes and see them go from beginner
to Florence Youth Symphony member to high school
graduate and some, on to major in music in college. He
also gets to experience the joy of complete strangers on
their wedding day when our quartet provides the music
for their wedding. Last is the ability of music to encour-
age people to be part of a group and stretch themselves
to try something new – like many of his bell choir mem-
bers. Many have little or no musical background but love
contributing to the worship service and push themselves
to learn and become better ringers.
Being married to a music man enhances our
relationship because we have music to tie us together on
so many levels. We have had the opportunity to play for
many of our friends’ weddings and contribute to their
special day together. I also have the opportunity to
expose our girls to their father in amazing leadership
roles that most children don’t get to experience. They
have seen their father conduct orchestras, the bell choir
at church, and have heard him perform with groups and
as a soloist. They see music as a part of their lives, not
something extra that happens every so often. He has,
and will continue, to nurture their love for music and that
is something that gives us a stronger bond as a family.
Mark is a wonderful husband, father and musi-
cian. He serves as a musician for the students of
Florence, the community of Florence and the members of
St. Luke. He is not defined by his job as a music teacher,
but defines musician by his willingness to go above and
beyond to share his love with the rest of the world.
97 5/21/09 10:12 AM Page 1

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98-99 5/25/09 10:41 AM Page 1
it’s raining
MEN the Single
Sam Mitchell
FAMILY: My family lives in Lexington, Kentucky. My brother,Alex, is 21 and my sis-
ter, Sally, is 18.
WHERE ARE YOU ORIGINALLY FROM? I was born in Indianapolis, Indiana,
and we moved around a bunch when I was growing up. We eventually landed in
Simpsonville, SC, when I was a sophomore in high school. I graduated from Mauldin
High School in 2004 and I consider the upstate to be my home. My family didn’t
move to Lexington until I was already in college.
HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN IN FLORENCE AND WHAT
BROUGHT YOU HERE? I moved to Florence in August of 2008
to work at NewSpring Church as the Worship Leader. I was an
“
Intern at NewSpring Church’s Anderson Campus before I came I AM SINGLE
to Florence.
– AND A
WHAT IS YOUR JOB? I lead worship for NewSpring GUY, SO I’M
Church and I work at our Florence Campus, which meets in
Chapman Auditorium of Francis Marion University at 9:30 and
EMBRACING
11:15 AM on Sunday mornings. It’s my first-ever full-time job. I lead
our band, schedule musicians and rehearsal times, manage a group of
volunteers on Sundays and sing and lead worship during the services. We
have four staff members at our Florence Campus: Michael Brown, Campus Pastor;
[THE TITLE].
David Hall, Children’s Director; and Jamie Salmon, Ministry Coordinator. Since we are
a small staff, our job responsibilities flow over onto one another and I never really know
what I could be doing when I get to work each day. My job is exciting, fulfilling and
engaging. I absolutely love it! It fires me up! I’m so incredibly blessed to be able to
do something this awesome for a living and I make every effort not to ever take it
for granted.
I’M ASSUMING YOU ARE USED TO PEOPLE TRYING TO “SET YOU
UP.” IS THIS CORRECT AND HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT IT?
Nobody has really tried to set me up in a while and that’s okay with me. Being “set
up” with a girl has the potential to either be really awesome or an epic failure. I try
really hard to make sure that even if there’s no chemistry, we could still be good
friends. I would probably only allow myself to be “set up” with someone if the per-
son setting me up was an extremely close friend of mine.
Guy
Collin M. Smith Photography
WHAT IS YOUR IDEA OF THE PERFECT DATE? My perfect date would
be doing something that we both enjoy. It would be awesome to see my date real-
ly being herself and enjoying the time we’re sharing – something like a concert with
a band we both like. That way we would get the time in the car together, maybe din-
ner, and then we could go get our faces melted off by some awesome music. I think
it’s important to have dates with just the two of you and also with a whole lot of
other people. Being around groups of people is a good way to learn things about
somebody that you’re dating, especially if it’s a first date. A theme park would be a
great perfect date! I love those! It would be so much fun to spend an entire day
together figuring out how we’re going to be able to ride every single ride
before the park closes on us.
WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS ABOUT FINDING
THE RIGHT PERSON? I think “finding the right person”
is not something single people should obsess over. It’s such a
daunting task. I believe that singleness can totally prove to be
a valuable gift for certain seasons of life. I believe that God
doesn’t want us to spend our time wishing our lives could be
” different than what He’s given us at the moment. I think it’s much
more important to be the right person. The question I ask myself is,
“Am I someone a girl would want to date?” The right person might come
along one day, but if I’m not the right person, then she might slip right out of my life
before I even knew she was there.
WHAT ARE THE QUALITIES OF YOUR IDEAL RELATIONSHIP?
Honesty is first and foremost. It absolutely has to be the foundation of a good rela-
tionship. All sorts of small problems can be easily worked out if two people are sim-
ply honest with each other and also with themselves. I think it’s very important to
be flexible in a relationship. Considering someone else to be more important than
you are is tough and being flexible can help with this process. There should be a con-
stant give-and-take-thing going on, always serving one another out of love. It’s also
important to me not to lose myself in a relationship. I need to always feel like myself.
If I have an epiphany moment in the middle of a relationship with a girl and the only
thought on my mind is, “This is not who I am,” then there’s a big problem. I’m con-
fident in who I am and I want to be in a relationship with someone who knows me,
cares about me, takes my shortcomings into consideration and makes me feel like I
can do the same for them.
98-99 5/25/09 10:42 AM Page 2

WHAT TRAIT OR QUALITY DO YOU FIND MOST ATTRACTIVE?

That’s easy! I find smart, strong, caring, capable girls to be attractive – the kind of per-
son that other people come to for advice and strength when they need it, the kind of
girl who makes people feel better just because she’s around. I guess you could say a
woman of good presence.

HOW DID YOU FEEL WHEN ASKED TO BE “THE SINGLE GUY” IN

THIS ISSUE? I thought it was totally rad! It’s not every day that I find myself being
asked to be in a magazine, so I thought it would be fun! Being “The Single Guy” – well,
I thought that could be an awkward headline to have over my photo in She; but, hey,
it’s not incorrect. I am single – and a guy, so I’m embracing it.

IF YOU HAD TO SUM UP YOUR PERSONALITY IN ONE WORD,

WHAT WOULD IT BE? Fun-loving

WHAT IS THE WEIRDEST THING ABOUT YOU? I have a nerdy streak! I’m
full of useless information and I love to fix things.

ARE YOU CHEAP OR THRIFTY? I’m careful with my finances. What girl wants
to date a broke loser with no job? Whoever the woman for me is, I guarantee she
doesn’t want to live in my parents’ basement with me. So, I take as good a care of my
finances as I can, knowing that being on top of money things can only bring me secu-
rity and peace of mind in life.

JUST FOR FUN,WHAT WERE YOUR LIFE-CHANGING MOMENTS? I

had a life-changing moment when I met Jesus and I gave Him my life. Taking this job in
Florence was a life-changing moment for me, as it was a big decision to move to a town
where I really didn’t know anybody. I moved back in with my parents after my fresh-
man year at Clemson and that entire year was certainly life-changing. I went to a com-
munity college and worked at a restaurant. We were living in Virginia Beach that year
and I learned a lot of things about who I am as a person. I became so appreciative for
other people, who they are and what they have to offer. That year was a difficult year
for me; I didn’t really know what I wanted to do in life. But, through lots of prayer and
talks with my dad, it all became clear and I enrolled at Anderson University as a music
student, knowing that I wanted to lead worship in some capacity for the rest of my life.

Sam Mitchell lives in Florence.

100 5/25/09 9:31 AM Page 1

it’s raining I suppose many of us think we have the best husband, but I
know – I truly know – that mine is the best! He has so many wonderful qual-

MEN ities, I tell people, “When I put my head down on my pillow at night, I know
that I am loved.”
It all started thirty-five years ago when a good friend of mine asked,
“Why don’t you go out with my good buddy?” I’m not much for blind dates;
but, at the time, I was a cheerleader at FMU and I needed an escort to an ath-
THE BEST HUSBAND: letic banquet. So, reluctantly, I said yes. But, let me tell you; it was not love at
first sight!

Bobby
The entire evening was a big disappointment. To my dismay, we sat at
the table with the former Editor Emeritus of the Florence Morning News and
my date talked to Dr. James F. Rogers the entire evening. Little did I know that
his parents and Dr. Rogers were close friends and their conversation didn’t
include me at all.
On top of that, we had fried chicken and my date devoured all the

Streett
meat off the bird, including the gristle, and sucked out the bone marrow. With
eyes wide open, I have never experienced such a disgusting sight!
Why I ever went out with him again was a surprise to me. However,
the second time we dated, he had this incredible spirit of being so kind and
by Pamela H. Streett
sincere. He never once tried to kiss me when he walked me to the door. I
was very impressed by the way he treated me like a lady.

“ YOU NEVER KNOW

WHEN YOU’LL MARRY
THE BEST OF THE BEST
– DESPITE THE FRIED

”
CHICKEN.

Collin M. Smith
Photography

Bobby told me years later that the first time he
saw me, he knew he was going to marry me. I, on the
other hand, went through many times of not treating him
with equal respect because he was just too nice. Plus, I
wasn’t ready for a serious relationship and I think he
was. The timing was just wrong for me. After several
years of dating, I told him that I thought we should see
other people (with the idea that I could date, but he
couldn’t). One night, I called his apartment and I could
hear girls laughing. I said, “That’s it! Take them home
now! I’m throwing in the towel!” That was when I knew
he was the man for me.
It just hit me! Bobby Streett was the kind of
guy that I wanted to marry. He had such a gentlemanly
respect for me, he was extremely smart, he was very
religious and he came from such a nice church-going
family. I knew that he would be a fantastic daddy, too.
He’s been a very hands-on daddy who helped
feed the children, bathe them and, yes, he even changed
diapers. He coached them in city league baseball. He
hunted and fished with them, which kept them occupied
– especially when they were teenagers. Still today, on
Mother’s Day, he gives me a card and thanks me for being
the mother of his children.
Of course, we’ve had our share of ups and
downs, but we kept a commitment to each other that we
made on our wedding day. Faith in God and lots of
prayer has kept us together during tough times. We also
talk and keep the communication lines open. We laugh
and say, “The secret to our long marriage is that we just
hope we don’t wake up hating each other on the same
day”.
And, yes, he definitely eats chicken the same
way. It’s quite humorous now because I know that no
one enjoys fried chicken as much as he does. So, remem-
ber, if it’s not love at first sight, give it some time. You
never know when you’ll marry the best of the best –
despite the fried chicken.
When I look at our life together, if I had to sum
up my life with Bobby in one sentence, it would be: “I
bought a lottery ticket and hit the jackpot!”

Pamela H. Streett is a retired Special Education Teacher from Florence School District One. She spends part of her time in Florence and part in Murrells Inlet,
SC. She and Bobby have two grown sons, Drew (his wife, Brandy) and Chandler. They have two adorable grandchildren, Harrington and Coker.
Bobby is a Realtor with Garden City Realty and a former Realtor with Aiken and Company.
101 5/21/09 11:45 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 101

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102 5/25/09 12:51 PM Page 1

it’s raining
MEN
THE SUPER DAD:
“ OUR MARRIAGE IS
SO WONDERFUL
AND I FEEL SO
SECURE IN

Randall
Graham
RANDALL’S LOVE
FOR THE CHILDREN
AND ME.

”
by Jennifer Graham

When I decided to marry Randall to buy groceries so I could sleep in a quiet house. He I am most thankful for Randall’s faith. As a
Graham in 1993, I absolutely considered what type would push a cart full of babies and pull one full of gro- nurse, I work many Saturday nights. That has never
of father I thought he would be. That was definitely part ceries. Someone would always ask, “Are all those stopped him from getting our children up and getting
of what I loved about him so much and why I wanted to yours?” He would joke,“Yeah, the other five are at home them fed and ready and off to church – for the early serv-
spend the rest of my life with him. He is playful and fun- with their Mama.” ice! I do remember the time I was working on a Sunday
loving and laid back. At the same time, however, he is Randall puts aside his own hobbies and interests and I was able to leave work long enough to see the pre-
responsible and reliable. in order to be such an involved dad. Now that our chil- school choir perform a song during “big church.” As
In April 1996, our first precious angel baby was dren are older, he has been able to include them in some soon as I walked in, I noticed Ashley had her dress on
born, Ashley Elizabeth. Katherine Lee followed in April of his favorite things like hunting, fishing and camping backwards. But, hey, they were there!
1997. We experienced two miscarriages and then our out. Nevertheless, he loves doing things with the children Every night ends with a family devotion from the
son, Pearson Cade, was born in February 2000. Summer that they enjoy. He especially likes it when he gets to Bible and Randall leading our family in prayer. Not only
Julia arrived in June 2001 and, finally, Mary Anna was born do things with them that he loved doing when he was a am I thankful for his spiritual leadership but also the
in February 2003. We didn’t expect to have such a large child. After work each day, you’ll find him in the yard other things he is teaching our children – commitment,
family. I think we thought two children, maybe three at playing with the children. From baseball, softball, dance, giving and financial responsibility (tithes and offerings),
the most. Even when we started having children, we did- Taekwondo, art lessons, surfing lessons,VBS, cheerleading, helping others, honesty, healthy living and keeping fit,
n’t know we would end up with five. We love them so beauty pageants, school activities, birthday parties – and respect for others and self – and lots of fun! I’m so proud
much and, to us, five kids do not seem like a lot; it’s just whatever else – he has been there. We have managed to of Randall for raising our children with such a strong
the right number. Occasionally, we toy with having just arrange our schedules so that he or I can be with our Christian faith and for being such a good witness to them
one more; but, I don’t think we will. I think we’re done. children instead of having to use daycare or babysitters. by his actions every day.
Our marriage is so wonderful and I feel
so secure in Randall’s love for the children and
me. Him being there and doing things with us Collin M. Smith
together as a family shows us how much he loves
Photography
us. The fact that he has been so helpful with all
aspects of raising the children has made us a
team. We work together.
Randall is absolutely the most hands-on
dad I know. From changing diapers, bathing and
feeding babies, cleaning up messes, taking care of
sick children, getting puked and pooped on – you
name it – he can handle it. We changed diapers
for nine years straight, twice with two in diapers
at the same time!
I’m a nurse and I usually work two,
twelve-hour shifts, mostly nights. Many times,
especially when the children were very young,
Randall would load all five of them up after I got
home from working all night and go to Wal-Mart

Jennifer Graham is a full-time Wife and Mom and a

part-time Labor and Delivery Nurse at The Women’s
Center at Carolinas Hospital System. Randall is a Field
Supervisor in claims for Farm Bureau Insurance.
They are the proud parents of Ashley (13), Katherine
(12), Pearson (9), Summer (7) and Mary Anna (6).
103 5/21/09 10:20 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 103

On Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Burry Bookstore
130 West Carolina Ave.
Hartsville, SC 29550
will be hosting New York
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104 5/25/09 9:30 AM Page 1

it’s raining Jimmy Trussell is a devoted husband, a wonderful father and

MEN one of the most thoughtful men alive. Most importantly, he is a Christian
man. We have been married six years and we have three children, ages four, two
and ten months (all boys).
All my friends and co-workers tell me how spoiled and how blessed I am
to have Jimmy. I don’t tell him enough just how much he means to me. Life some-
times gets in the way of telling the most important people in our lives how cher-
THE BEST HUSBAND & DAD: ished they are. So, I thought, what better way to let him know than to tell him in
our favorite magazine. Most of the time, he picks up “my” issue of She and ends up

Jimmy
reading it before I do! (He’s going to kill me for telling that.)
I met Jimmy in 2001at a Pampered Chef party that his mother was having.
Well, I didn’t actually meet him that day; I just saw him and thought he was really
cute. We didn’t even talk. I commented to his mother and sister that I thought
he was cute and his mom’s response was, “He’s as sweet as he is cute.”
He was actually only there to move tables for his mom, which really
impressed me. I’ve always heard that guys that treat their mothers with respect will

Trussell
by Laura Trussell
do the same with the women in their lives. This is so true of Jimmy. I always tell
him he is such a “mama’s boy” and I am so glad that he is. (She is wonderful.)
I knew he was “the one” right away. Have you ever just met someone that
you just mesh with? Well, that’s what happened with us. Not only did I fall in love
with him, I fell in love with his family, too. We both come from the same family back-
ground with the same morals and I knew I wanted this with my lifelong partner.
Family is so important to both of us.
I knew that Jimmy would be a great father, but neither of us ever expect-
ed to have children as soon as we did – or as many as we did. We laugh about it
all the time (sometimes, we want to cry!). I got pregnant two months after we were
married and again a year and a half later – and then again a year after that. We still
have a hard time believing it ourselves. We have three children!
This is just a brief overview of my husband’s daily routine. He works full-
time as an insurance agent and is usually the one to pick up all three children from
daycare. If I have to pick them up, he always goes with me to help. He then plays
outside with them while I prepare some sort of meal. He bathes all three children
every night, usually makes bottles for the baby and feeds him dinner. We tag-team
story time and Bible stories and getting the children to bed. He then helps with
any of the household chores such as vacuuming, loading/unloading the dishwasher,
folding clothes and getting things prepared for the next day. The list goes on and on.
He is the parent you see taking the children to school and daycare every
morning just so I can leave early for work. That’s not to mention the lunch he has
packed for me and the coffee he has brewed for me. I know! I know! What do I
do? That’s just it. We are such a team and I don’t think he realizes how vital he is
to our daily ability to thrive as a family. I honestly could not do it without him.
On top of all this, he has outside activities that he participates in, as well.
He is the coach of our four-year-old’s T-ball team. He’s active in our church and he
loves spending time with his family and friends. I’m so honored to have someone
that is such a great role model for our boys. I only hope and pray that they will be
just like their daddy.
Fatherhood has come so naturally to Jimmy. He is the calm in our storms.
He keeps our family grounded and just makes things flow. If I get really flustered,
he calmly says, “Why don’t you just go sit down and I’ll handle it.”

“
One of the things that touches me about Jimmy with our children is he
I KNEW sees the importance of being such a present dad. He is the dad that wants us all to
eat together at the dinner table. He wants us all to be outside playing together and
HE WAS all of us to lay in bed together. Jimmy says that it’s very important that our chil-

“THE ONE” dren grow up in a Christian home and this is what I adore most about him. He is
a dad that reads Bible stories and prays with his children.

RIGHT Jimmy is my best friend. He’s my rock. Of course, we have struggles and
we have highs and lows, but I cannot think of a better man to share all these things
AWAY. with than my husband, Jimmy Trussell. I’m so lucky – and, yes, I know it! When our

” children are all grown up, I want them to know that their daddy has been the best
husband anyone could ask for. He treats me with such respect and we have fun
together, even when we’re up to our eyeballs in stress. He is an encourager and
our provider.
I won’t have to tell our boys anything about being a wonderful father; they
already know because Jimmy shows them each and every day what it’s like to be a
great daddy. Even at their young ages, they know they have a great man as their
father. It’s evident by their giggles and smiles.

Laura and Jimmy Trussell and their three sons,

Reed (5), Miles (2), and Walker (11months) live in Marion.

photos by Jessica Moore

105 5/21/09 12:11 PM Page 1
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She Magazine • June 2009 • 105
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She
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106 5/25/09 12:10 PM Page 1

it’s raining
MEN Steve and I met at Florence Little Theatre around the first
of October of 1977 during their production of the musical,
“Shenandoah.” The first time I saw him, he was dancing on stage. I
don’t remember a particular moment that I knew he was the one, but

THE BEST HUSBAND: it was about a month after we met. All I can say is, I just knew. We
were married in my hometown, Williamsburg,Virginia, on July 8, 1978.

SteveMace
(Steve said that would be an easy date to remember – 7-8-78.)
My life with Steve has been full – full of joy and, of course,
challenges. Nevertheless, we have an underlying security and strength
in knowing that not only our love, but our like for each other is unfailing.
When I saw the call in a previous issue for “best husbands” I
knew I had to tell you about Steve. Thus, my acronym for :

“THE BEST HUSBAND.”

by Shirley Mace
Tapes sweet notes to my pillow, to my rearview mirror, on a cabinet door,
in the dryer, in my suitcase . . .
Helps out around the house – I have often come home after a long trip or
a trying day to find the laundry done and the floors vacuumed.
Eats leftovers or makes his own supper without complaint

Buys me flowers and cards for no special reason or occasion

Exemplifies a Christ-like model with his unselfish and giving attitude, always
putting my happiness first
Says he loves me and compliments me at random yet frequent moments
Tags along for antiquing because he “just like[s] spending time with [me]”

Hopelessly romantic – On our first engagement anniversary, he actually

“ WE HAVE AN
UNDERLYING
SECURITY AND
STRENGTH IN
called the person living in my old apartment (where he proposed) and got
them to leave their home for the evening so that he could surprise me with
an evening of reminiscing. Another time, he read an article that suggested
writing messages on the bathroom mirror with antifreeze (which we found
out does not come off). Now (and I guess forever), when the mirror fogs
KNOWING up, you can still see the words, “Steve loves Shirley.”
THAT NOT Understands that, even though we could use the income, I am much happier
ONLY OUR (and easier to live with) if I only work outside the home two days a week

LOVE, BUT Sacrificial surprises – During the penny-pinching, stay-at-home-mom days, I

once admired a dress, which we couldn’t afford. He went back to the store,
OUR LIKE FOR bought it, wrapped it up and surprised me with it.
EACH OTHER Boys Day – When our sons were small, he took them out of the house for
IS UNFAILING.

”
some kind of “guy” adventure every Saturday so that I could have a few
hours of “me” time.
Awards – Starting with our first anniversary, he has presented me with a
large plaque, which is engraved, “The Stephen P. Mace Annual Wife of the
Year Award, presented every July eighth to the most wonderful wife in the
world.” So far, my name is engraved on 30 of the 50 plates (although there
have definitely been some years when I did not deserve to win).
Never belittles me but always builds me up in public and in private
Date nights have been a priority every week since our boys were old enough
to understand the words,“Don’t come downstairs unless somebody needs
to go to the emergency room!” He cherishes these romantic candlelight
evenings as much as I do.

Shirley and Steve Mace live in Marion. They have two sons,Thad and Nathan.
Shirley is a Speech-Language Pathologist with McLeod Medical Center Dillon.
Steve is a Farm Loan Officer with the USDA Farm Service Agency in Florence.
photo by Jessica Moore
107 5/21/09 4:08 PM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 107

108 5/25/09 9:27 AM Page 1
it’s raining
MEN
THE SWEETEST SON-IN-LAW:
Brian
Hyder
by Darlene Bateman
After going through a painful
divorce in 2000, I was very cynical about love and
felt jaded. Mandy is my only child and I wanted to shel-
ter her from being hurt – especially by the torture of
divorce. The Bible clearly teaches one man for one
woman for life. If you enter marriage based on God’s
Word, you truly are “one flesh.” When my ex-husband
left us, I felt as though half of me had been traumatically
amputated. It was a jagged wound that left an ugly scar.
I prayed that if it was God’s will for Mandy to marry, He
would send her the one He chose for her and in His per-
fect timing.
A mutual friend of Brian and Mandy’s introduced
them. They talked on the phone several times before
their first date on April 21, 2006. When Brian came to
pick Mandy up that night, I answered the door. A very
pleasant, courteous young man introduced himself. I
could tell he was a little apprehensive and that was
understandable. I knew right away in my heart that Brian
was the one God had chosen. Nonetheless, I still
thought, “Man, if you hurt my daughter . . . .”
Mandy told me that Brian was a Christian and an
active member of Cornerstone Baptist Church (two
pluses – saved and Baptist). Yet, that cynicism was there,
rearing its ugly head. Brian would have to prove to me
that he didn’t just “talk it”; I’d have to see him “walk it.”
Too many people profess what they do not possess. It
didn’t take long for me to see that Brian Hyder was all he
claimed to be. He treated Mandy – and me – with
respect. I could tell he had been raised in a Christian
home and he definitely was a Christian gentleman (and
there are very few of those).
Over time, marriage became the topic of con-
versation. A sense of panic struck my heart. “I’m going
to lose my only child!” I thought.
I often told Mandy that if she ever found a man
who could love her like I do, she could marry him. Of
course, in my mind, I’m thinking, “That ain’t gonna hap-
pen!” It soon became obvious that Brian did love her just
as deeply but in a different way. All this time, his charac-
ter never changed and his lifestyle fleshed out what he
Originally from Dillon, Darlene Bateman lives in Florence and has since 1976. She has worked as a Registered Nurse and a Paralegal. As a member of Florence Baptist Temple, where she sings
in the choir, she loves to write and has co-written a Southern gospel song. Her daughter and son-in-law, Mandy and Brian live in Florence.
professed. Still, Brian had not
officially proposed to Mandy.
It had become custom-
ary for them to spend one night
a week hanging out with me and
watching TV. One night, when
“
Mandy left the room, Brian
asked me in a whisper if he
I COULD TELL
could come over the fol- HE DEFINITELY
lowing Thursday night to WA S A
talk to me while Mandy
CHRISTIAN
was working. I knew what
”
he wanted. This young GENTLEMAN...
Christian gentleman, who I, too,
had grown to love, was going to ask
for my permission and blessing to marry my daughter.
That night came and an obviously-nervous Brian sat on
my couch. This sweet, respectful young man was han-
dling this the way God would have him handle it and I was
touched deeply. He told me that he did not want Mandy
to know of our little appointment because he wanted the
time and circumstances of his proposal to be a surprise.
He also did not want to deprive Mandy of the joy and
thrill of telling her family.
The first thing I did was ask him if he minded
sharing his testimony. It has been my experience that
when you ask someone to do that and they are offended,
they don’t have a testimony to share. Without hesitation,
he gladly shared with me how he was saved. The moth-
er in me, of course, had a few questions for him and a
mini sermon from Ephesians 5. After our talk, I assured
him I would not tell Mandy about our meeting and I
hugged him.
I thought to myself, “If we could clone you and
age you about twenty years, I might just get married
again.” Cynical, jaded me actually talked about marriage with
my name in the sentence. Through Brian, God had begun a
miracle by melting my heart and transforming my attitude.
In a very romantic setting in Charleston about a
month later, Brian asked Mandy to be his wife. She
called me on her cell phone and told me. Through the
Collin M. Smith Photography
next year, they dated and set their wedding date for
April 26, 2008.
I don’t know how many times Brian and Mandy
spent a day with me, taking me to places I wanted to go
that most men don’t – like shopping. Not only was Brian
a willing chauffeur, he actually picked out clothes for
Mandy and gave me his input and opinion on my mother-
of-the-bride dress. How many men (especially young
men) would do that? Spend the day with his future moth-
er-in-law? Most men would cringe at the thought.
Their wedding day came and it was tailor-made
for them and perfect in every way. Brian planned the
honeymoon destination – St. Lucia – and kept it a secret.
He wanted to surprise Mandy. For their first anniversary,
he also planned a weekend for them and he didn’t tell
anyone where he was taking his bride.
I’m so happy for them and so thankful to God
for bringing them together. I honestly believe that Brian
loves Mandy as Christ loved the church and gave Himself
for it. I am very blessed. Brian is not only the man in
Mandy’s life, he is also the man in mine. I love him as the
son I never had.
I’ve learned that you cannot shield your chil-
dren’s hearts, but you can raise them with prayer and ask
God to direct their lives. God worked through Brian
(and still is) in miraculous ways. You can see from my
story that I had no reason to fear losing my daughter; I
gained the sweetest son-in-law alive.
109 5/21/09 10:37 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 109

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110 5/26/09 11:18 AM Page 1

it’s raining
MEN I met Walt Hyman in November 2004. I was a
divorced, single mom with two girls, ages three and seven. I was also in
nursing school. I fell in love with Walt in a very short time because of
his kind and gentle spirit, his love for the Lord and his ability to love
THE BEST DAD: with his whole heart. We were married on November 5, 2005. My story
has a little more history to understand how great this man is.

Walt
Me ex-husband (the girls’ biological father) didn’t have a very
involved relationship with them. Walt took on being their daddy right
from the start. While we were still dating, he would come to my house
at 5 AM so that I could go to clinicals. He would get the girls up, feed
them breakfast, get them ready and take them to school. He had never
been married nor had children, so this was all new to him. Nonetheless,

Hyman
by Winona Hyman
he did it without complaints.
Walt said he fell in love with all three of us. At our wedding, he
said the most wonderful vows to me and then got on one knee and said
vows to each of the girls and gave them both a heart necklace that read,
“I love you.” The girls’ biological father relinquished his rights to them.
Walt said they were his girls, so he adopted them. I am so blessed that
he has loved Hannah and Jenna like he has been with them since birth.
He treats them as his because in his eyes, they are. He wanted to adopt

“
them so that there was no doubt that he was their father.
HE LOVES US We recently had a baby boy. During my pregnancy, he was
UNCONDITIONALLY amazing. He took all the mood swings, rubbed my feet, listened to my
complaints and still loved me and was willing to do anything I asked. He
AND SUPPORTS even went to three different restaurants to get the three things I craved.
US NO MATTER The first night home from the hospital, he stayed up all night with the
WHAT. baby and didn’t sleep. He wanted to let me rest and was afraid he might

” not hear him if he fell asleep.

Walt is sweet for so many reasons. The most obvious being his
love for his family. He loves our children and he loves me. He loves us
unconditionally and supports us no matter what. Patient and compas-
sionate, he helps without complaints. A true and loyal friend,Walt is the
person you call at 2 AM and you know that he’ll be there. He goes above
and beyond for the people he cares about. I haven’t met anyone yet that
has anything but nice things to say about him. When his dad was sick, he
cared for him in such a special way. He loves his mama and takes good
care of her, as well.
As a father, he is at every game and field day he can make it to.
He has taken the girls to many father/daughter dances. He has even had
his hair and nails done by his two favorite girls. He supports and encour-
ages them and, most importantly, provides an example of a how a man
should be and, hopefully, the kind of man the girls will marry one day. He
is so tender and loving with our sweet baby boy. As a husband, he is
more supportive and caring than anyone I have ever met. He is a great
husband and an amazing father.
He is also great with children in general. On the recreation
league board in our town, he coaches and umpires games. He encour-
ages not only our children but the ones around him.
Hannah and Jenna truly love their daddy. They admire and
respect him. They see him as such a good role model by his words and
actions. They know that they can count on him to be there no matter
what.
Jenna recently said that she was not related to her daddy by
blood; she was related to him by heart. That’s why he’s the best dad.

Winona and Walt Hyman live in Pamplico. They have two daughters, Hannah (11)
and Jenna (8), and a son, Kolby (4 months). Winona is Dr. Kelly Rainwater’s Nurse
at Florence OB/GYN. Walt works for Rental Uniform.
111 5/21/09 10:40 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 111

U arbara U ennett &_ ynda Z rant

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112-113 5/26/09 8:46 PM Page 1

it’s raining
MEN
MAKEOVER MY MAN!
THE LAWYER TURNED ROCKER:

PhillipAtkinson
THE CALL FOR HELP:

Dear She,

My name is Abby and I am seven-years-old. My mommy said that you are doing makeovers on men and I wanted you to
choose my daddy for one. He is the best daddy in the world and I love him.
His name is Philip and he is a lawyer, so he wears a suit to work every day and even to church on Sundays. What most peo-
ple don’t know is that he secretly wants to be a rock star. He plays guitar and even used to play with a band. He has friends
who really are rock stars out in California and I think it would be fun to make my daddy look like one, too.
AFTER Do you think you could help?

Abby Atkinson, Marion

THE MAKEOVER:

Philip came to us at the SALON, growing out from a bad haircut. We talked and I realized what a fun,
energetic personality he has, so we decided to do something that he could wear conservatively during
the day but have fun with at night. A faux-hawk seemed the perfect choice. We used Redken Velvet
Gelatine to blow his hair dry, which gave texture and fullness. Once dry, we pieced it out with Pureology
Texture Twist. Now, we feel like his haircut reflects his true personality.

Barbi Lee, Owner/Stylist - THE SALON 1263, CELEBRATION BOULEVARD, FLORENCE

THE CLOTHES:

Casual Jeans by Agave

Button-Up Rodeo Show Shirt by 3J Workshop
Black Studded Belt by Trafalgar

AFTER THOUGHTS FROM PHILIP:

As an attorney, it is difficult for me to attend

social functions in appropriate dress casual
clothing. I usually have to leave from court or
work and tend to be very over-dressed for the
occasion. This makeover actually showed me
that very casual clothing can become dress-
casual. It is all a matter of your attitude

Philip Atkinson and his wife, Allie,

and their daughter, Abby, live in BEFORE
Marion. He is an Attorney with
Folkens Law Firm in Florence.
C. Wilson Studios
Photography by
112-113 5/26/09 8:47 PM Page 2

LifeStyle Swap Makeovers -

The Conservative Lawyer Rocks Out
and the Working Man Suits Up

BEFORE HughesPage
THE CLOTHES:

Nautica Suit
Shoes by Allen Edmonds
Brown Belt by Trafalgar
Tie by Butler’s
THE CALL FOR HELP:

Dear She,
My son,Hughes, has always had great style and a way to make any outfit look good. Lately, how-
ever, he seems to be working all the time and spending less time dressing up. His job involves
cutting grass and digging in dirt, which leaves him pretty messy at the end of the day.
Recently, he graduated from Francis Marion University and I want to do something special for
him. I want him to feel confident in his appearance for future job interviews or even just attend-
ing a wedding.
AFTER
Thank you for considering Hughes for a makeover,
Charlotte Battle
THE MAKEOVER:

As soon as Hughes walked in the door, we could tell he was really outgoing and had a great per- Hughes Page lives in
Florence. He graduated
sonality. He was willing to do anything that would work well with work and play. He had very
from Francis Marion with a
thick hair, so we razored it heavily. After the cut, we used Redken Rewind and Get Groomed
degree in Biology and is
to give his hair separation and a little bit of volume. These products also help with movement working with Gardenearth.
and to give more control for thick hair. This style haircut looks great on Hughes and gives him
that clean-cut look he desired.

Patsy Clemmons, Owner/Stylist - FIRST IMPRESSIONS, 1621 2ND LOOP ROAD, FLORENCE

AFTER THOUGHTS FROM HUGHES:

“It’s always entertaining to hang out with the staff at First Impressions. Patsy did an awesome
job with my hair. She knows what hairstyles are in and helped clean up my rough edges. I was
(as always) satisfied with my haircut at First Impressions.
Spencer at Butler’s Fine Men’s Clothing couldn’t have been easier to work with. He found a
suit that can be worn almost anywhere and at any time. I wanted something that looked nice
when it’s necessary to look nice for something; the blue suit works perfectly. I also wanted Photography by
something that I would look sharp in when I get to San Francisco.” - Hughes Page C. Wilson Studios
129- 5/21/09 3:59 PM Page 1

114 • June 2009 • She Magazine

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115 5/21/09 10:46 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 115

“Her clinical skills

are impeccable,
and she exudes
professionalism.”
Congratulations
Melissa Sarmiento, R.N., Sixth Floor
2009 Nurse of the Year

Melissa Sarmiento’s combination of

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An employee of Carolinas Hospital System
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Her daily dedication and personal interest
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www.carolinashospital.com
116 5/26/09 11:07 AM Page 1

n
"A father is always making his baby into a little woman.
And when she is a woman he turns her back again."
n
- Enid Bagnold
117 5/21/09 10:52 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 117

the Perfect Father’s Day

Gift for Dad!

Carolina
Pattie Hudson
Director and Independent Consultant
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Opportunities Available UPCOMING EVENTS
•Color Purple Broadway Trip,
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405 S. Ebenezer Rd • www.familyneckandback.com • 843-662-4341
118 5/21/09 12:47 PM Page 1

STAND BY
Your MAN
by Ouida K. Page

T
The economic climate that we are living in is a whole new animal. The stock
market is doing things that it hasn’t done in ten or more years and there are new issues
such as variable sub-prime rate mortgages and scams we wish we had not heard about.
All these things have affected the economy and it trickles down to businesses in our
town that affect us. It has affected our neighbors, relatives and many of the people that
we know. Some marriages are very strained right now because of job losses or poten-
tial job losses. Maybe the company that your husband is working for has not gone under
or declared bankruptcy, but the management is having meetings and telling the employ-
ees that things are not looking good and they may have to make cuts. Sometimes, a neg-
ative possibility hanging over your head is worse in some ways than the ax falling and
you know you are going to lose your job.
Some men define themselves by the work they do and the amount of money
they make. They may feel very
down and discouraged
when they lose their
job and cannot find
another job. Not only is there an issue of less money, now they feel personally respon-
sible and it may affect their self-esteem when they cannot provide for their family. This
can be the case, even when the woman is working and making a good salary. You can
encourage your husband and sit down with him and help him make a list of job options.
He can write down his strengths and weaknesses as you help him identify other areas
in which to seek employment. You can help him organize phone numbers, job listings,
etc., and even help him if he needs to work on his resume. All these behaviors are
encouraging and can be very helpful, especially if your husband has become discouraged.
You, as a wife or significant other, can be the objective listener and helper
because it does directly affect you, but you are not the one it is happening to personal-
ly. If you find that you are too upset to be objective, then you may need to seek out
other help such as a job service agency or even a counselor if there is a lot of conflict
occurring so that you can help get your husband on the right track to look for a job.
Some men may not want any help and then you have to use wisdom in your
interactions with them. Older men may possibly have a harder time because they may
have been in the same job and career field for years and have not looked for a job in
twenty years. They also may find that they are discriminated against because of
their age. This is not acceptable, but it does occur in the job market.
A lady I know told me both of her neighbors, who were mar-
ried to each other, lost their jobs at the same time and they have two
children. I am certain this was a stressful situation. In this kind of
situation, the individuals would have to call on their inner
resources and contact their family and friends for help. Also, this
would be a time to pray and ask God to intervene. One Bible
promise says that God shall supply all of our needs according to
His riches in glory by Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:19).
After praying this prayer, then I believe you have to go out
and take action. Encourage your husband to knock on doors
and call for interviews and see what opens up for him.
Continue to try and remind him to have a positive attitude.
Know that God loves you and your family and wants what is
best for you. We tend to forget this in the middle of adversity.
We are living in some very challenging times and none of this
stuff is easy. Do the very best you can and support your hus-
band if he loses his job and help him in every way you can until
he finds another job. If you can’t be positive and support him
because of any reason, then help him get the knowledge and
contacts that he needs to move forward on his own.

Ouida K. Page is a Licensed Professional and National Board Certified

Counselor with a Bachelor’s Degree in Nursing and is a member of the
International Honor Society of Nursing. She has been in private practice
for over 15 years, specializing in families and issues relating to children,
adolescents and women of all ages. Ouida is married and has one son.
You may contact her by e-mailing editor@shemagazine.com
with “Ouida” as the subject matter.
119 5/26/09 10:31 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 119

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at First Baptist Church!

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maximum potential. Our rehabilitation assessments are
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120-121 5/26/09 2:24 PM Page 1
finding HIM
I have long been intrigued by who He is. Knowing Him is kinda like dreaming
about your future husband. He’s perfect and charming and attractive and chivalrous. He’s
the consummate Gentleman, and He knows how to woo.
But, once upon a time, there was me. And I didn’t think those warm, fuzzies about God. As
a little girl I experienced some deep hurt and some super negative church experiences at
the hands of some harsh and cold church people. As a little girl, I felt forgotten by God.
Overlooked. Neglected. Abandoned by Him. I was a little person with no use for God,
and you don’t undo that very easily…
And so it was as a thirteen year-old that I first heard that God loved me at
Centrifuge youth camp at North Greenville College. I went for the boys. I went because of
my friends. I went for a week away from home, but I left having made a new Acquaintance
(and snagged a new boyfriend from Dothan, Alabama).
But the ten years after that were rocky for me and Him. In fact, I am the picture
in the Illustrated Bible for Matthew 13:5-6. In my case, the Seed fell on the rocky places; "it
sprang up quickly because the soil was shallow. But when the sun came up, the plants were
scorched, and they withered because they had no root." My claim to Christ was not root-
ed in faith.There was a lot of heart stuff going on (emotions) and a lot of head stuff going
on (I began to attend discipleship classes), but there was no root. So when life as a teen and
a college student got wild, so did I. I had enough of Jesus to keep me out of hell, but that
was absolutely it...
And so knowing that Jesus loved me was cute and all, like the song, but that in and
of itself meant very little in the day-to-day living of my life.The knowledge of it was kinda
like applying a band-aid to an amputation; it didn't do much to heal the
gash that was in my soul. I did believe that He loved me, but I
wondered why He had not loved me before I was thir-
teen. My adolescent under-
standing deduced that
He started loving
me because
by Cookie Cawthon
I bought what He was selling. First, you drink the Kool-Aid then you get the goods: His affec-
tion, His protection, His forgiveness, etc... I bought it, but it didn't all jive with me. I remem-
ber sitting in a youth retreat in Garden City, and we were anonymously turning in questions
to our youth pastor to discuss as a group. My question was - Why do bad things happen to
good people? I was deeply disturbed by who I thought God might be. In my brain He was
punitive and selfish and partial and powerful, and to me that was a pretty scary combina-
tion. His love was manifest when He withheld punishment that I deserved, which is true but
it isn't the only manifestation of His love. I had a super-limited understanding of God's char-
acter and that tripped me up for years.
There was an absolute disconnect between what I wrestled with in my spirit and
in my heart about God and how I lived. In fact, I honestly remember praying for forgiveness
in advance of going out to drink way too much (by the way I do now understand that isn't
how forgiveness works). I showed my fanny for a good eight years before college gradua-
tion saved me from myself by removing me from the environment that promoted my
destructive behaviors.
Chris - who was not a believer at the time - suggested that we (as a new couple)
start attending church regularly because that's what respectable people did; it was a great
way to meet people, and it was the right way to start a work week. God took full advan-
tage of having us for an hour a week and began to till the soil of our hearts for future plant-
ing; give that Fella an inch and He'll take a mile every time.
We added Sunday School to our repertoire when we moved to Flotown, and God
just kept drawing us in ever so slightly and slowly - almost imperceptibly.And we were will-
ing to be drawn. In large part because God had surrounded us by people who were
like us but who loved Him.They were willing to say, "I need Jesus because I
totally screw it up on my own!" and we could identify with that. Chris made
a new Acquaintance, and we became inchworms for Christ - inching closer
and closer to Him, in very small increments, mind you.
I quit teaching after Carson was born and attended my first women's
Bible study, after all what in the world was I going to do all day? I was born
to be a student; I love to be a student. It's why I became a teacher (because
no one would pay me to be a forever student, and teaching was as
close as I could get. I still got to be in the classroom, smell books,
and use newly sharpened pencils). So, I took seriously my
role as a Bible student. If the teacher challenged us to pray in
the middle of the night in a headstand (which she did not),
that's what I did. I totally think God was humored by my
desire to obey and please.
It was in those Beth Moore Bible studies that she gave
me permission to be honest with God; she began to press on
my gash and whispered to my soul that He was big enough
to handle it. And the truth bubbled to the surface. I
was angry with God. I was a twenty-eight year-old
mom who was angry. With. God. So I put on my
big girl panties, and gritted my teeth, and pointed
my finger in the air, and began asking the hard
questions – Where were you when I was a little
girl? Why didn’t I enjoy your protection? How
can I trust you? What kind of God overlooks a
precious little girl?
And it was there - in that place of broken-
ness - that the fullness of our relationship began.
It was as if He said in perfect tenderness,"Thank you
for asking; I've been wanting to talk to you about this
for a long time." (continued)
120-121 5/26/09 2:24 PM Page 2

...continued

This conversation occurred in the midst of a study entitled Believing God, and
The Perfect Gift For Dad
part of the homework was to create a timeline of my life. By answering a host of probing .....the very best in eye glasse s and contact lens
questions, I was to revisit every stage of my life and document how God had been pres-
ent all along. I fully expected to find no evidence of Him in my early years, but one of the

www.stokeseye.com
dearest things He has ever done for me was allow me to literally see His fingerprints all
over my childhood - mostly in the amazing people He strategically placed around me. He
gave me favor with some of the kindest people I have ever encountered, and He loved me
through them since I was not in a healthy church situation nor was I in the company of
compassionate believers that much at all.The older couple who kept me while my mom
worked (sometimes until 9:30 at night); I was their favorite. The family who owned the
rental house my mom and I lived in was so good to us. My third grade teacher; I was her
pet.Two older ladies who cared for me in Marion. My Nana and Poppa (my new grand-
parents). He used their arms to hug me; their hearts to love me; their voices to affirm me.
He gave me two parents who thought I hung the moon; in retrospect I am allowed to see
that there was no shortage of love and there was no absence of God.
With regards to the pain of those years; He assured me that He was as angry
and as saddened as I was. He reminded me of His justice. He had not chosen that pain for
me, but He had allowed it for this very day - that I might share His faithfulness in the face
of life's ugliness. Through my study of His Word, He promised to heal me, to make me
healthy, and to use it all for my good and His purposes. If I would allow Him to...
I have.

“The knowledge of it was

kinda like applying a band-aid
to an amputation; it didn't do
much to heal the gash that was Pee Dee Optical
665.4343 or 1.800.868.7613
in my soul.” 602 E Cheves St • Florence
I was blown away to discover that I had been wrong about Him all along.This Across from the McLeod Medical Regional Center Located in the
life-changing experience piqued my interest to know Him, to know His character, to know Stokes Regional Eye Center Building
His heart. I got real with Him and stopped trying to pray the right things because that's
what I thought He wanted to hear; as if He didn't know what a liar I was. It's hard to get
really real, even with your own self, but He is safe. He is gentle, compassionate, slow to
anger, ever present, abounding in love, all knowing, attentive and involved, patient, perfect-
ly good, perfectly faithful. He has never not kept His Word, and there is no darkness in
Him.The Bible is full of His promises of love and hope and peace and joy and comfort, and
He has never dropped the ball on a single one.
About the time all of this wildness was going on inside me, a most bizarre thing
happened. I never saw it coming. I was really starting to love Jesus and enjoyed learning Limited Time Offer for
more and more and more. One Sunday morning the Sunday School teacher called Chris,
who was the SS director for our class, and announced that he was sick and was unable to Laser Vision Correction!
teach in forty-five minutes.That meant that Chris would have to step up; I volunteered to 1/2 off the price of the second eye at
do it because I had been a teacher by vocation. I could barely swallow past the lump in my
the time of the LASIK procedure.*
throat, and I thought I really might throw up. I was the terribly quiet one in class each week
who got really nervous about even making a comment (I know that is too far-out there Our LASIK ranges from standard to the most advanced
to even believe). I taught that day - with great trepidation and stammering- and burst into CustomVue bladeless technology.
flames right before the class (not literally although that's a pretty cool image). I discovered Call today and see what’s right for you.
my life purpose in that cinder block room. I am most alive in this world when I am speak-
Free Consultation Available.
ing or teaching or writing about His goodness and His faithfulness. I love it like nothing
else.
I can tell you that He has healed my marriage of past sin and past hurts. He has
taken every hurt in my life and used it for good. He has allowed me to pray some of the
biggest prayers my tiny brain could conceive of and then answered them a gajillion times
bigger than I dared dream. He has blessed me with people in my life who push me to be
more like Him. He has permitted me to see Him change people's lives, and He has blessed
me with a passion that my skin can barely contain! I just may burst...
602 E. Cheves St.
That is not to say that I don't get discouraged, distracted, angry, impatient, disin-
Florence 843-664-2127
terested, self-absorbed, apathetic, etc, etc, etc... I am still flawed, weak Cookie who screws Located inside the Stokes www.stokeseye.com
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Cookie Cawthon loves Jesus with all her heart and wants you to too; she
can be contacted at secawthon@yahoo.com.

*Some restrictions apply

120-121 5/26/09 11:17 AM Page 2

...continued

This conversation occurred in the midst of a study entitled Believing God, and
The Perfect Gift For Dad
part of the homework was to create a timeline of my life. By answering a host of probing .....the very best in eye glasse s and contact lens
questions, I was to revisit every stage of my life and document how God had been pres-
ent all along. I fully expected to find no evidence of Him in my early years, but one of the

www.stokeseye.com
dearest things He has ever done for me was allow me to literally see His fingerprints all
over my childhood - mostly in the amazing people He strategically placed around me. He
gave me favor with some of the kindest people I have ever encountered, and He loved me
through them since I was not in a healthy church situation nor was I in the company of
compassionate believers that much at all.The older couple who kept me while my mom
worked (sometimes until 9:30 at night); I was their favorite. The family who owned the
rental house my mom and I lived in was so good to us. My third grade teacher; I was her
pet.Two older ladies who cared for me in Marion. My Nana and Poppa (my new grand-
parents). He used their arms to hug me; their hearts to love me; their voices to affirm me.
He gave me two parents who thought I hung the moon; in retrospect I am allowed to see
that there was no shortage of love and there was no absence of God.
With regards to the pain of those years; He assured me that He was as angry
and as saddened as I was. He reminded me of His justice. He had not chosen that pain for
me, but He had allowed it for this very day - that I might share His faithfulness in the face
of life's ugliness. Through my study of His Word, He promised to heal me, to make me
healthy, and to use it all for my good and His purposes. If I would allow Him to...
I have.

“The knowledge of it was

kinda like applying a band-aid
to an amputation; it didn't do
much to heal the gash that was Pee Dee Optical
665.4343 or 1.800.868.7613
in my soul.” 602 E Cheves St • Florence
I was blown away to discover that I had been wrong about Him all along.This Across from the McLeod Medical Regional Center Located in the
life-changing experience piqued my interest to know Him, to know His character, to know Stokes Regional Eye Center Building
His heart. I got real with Him and stopped trying to pray the right things because that's
what I thought He wanted to hear; as if He didn't know what a liar I was. It's hard to get
really real, even with your own self, but He is safe. He is gentle, compassionate, slow to
anger, ever present, abounding in love, all knowing, attentive and involved, patient, perfect-
ly good, perfectly faithful. He has never not kept His Word, and there is no darkness in
Him.The Bible is full of His promises of love and hope and peace and joy and comfort, and
He has never dropped the ball on a single one.
About the time all of this wildness was going on inside me, a most bizarre thing
happened. I never saw it coming. I was really starting to love Jesus and enjoyed learning Limited Time Offer for
more and more and more. One Sunday morning the Sunday School teacher called Chris,
who was the SS director for our class, and announced that he was sick and was unable to Laser Vision Correction!
teach in forty-five minutes.That meant that Chris would have to step up; I volunteered to 1/2 off the price of the second eye at
do it because I had been a teacher by vocation. I could barely swallow past the lump in my
the time of the LASIK procedure.*
throat, and I thought I really might throw up. I was the terribly quiet one in class each week
who got really nervous about even making a comment (I know that is too far-out there Our LASIK ranges from standard to the most advanced
to even believe). I taught that day - with great trepidation and stammering- and burst into CustomVue bladeless technology.
flames right before the class (not literally although that's a pretty cool image). I discovered Call today and see what’s right for you.
my life purpose in that cinder block room. I am most alive in this world when I am speak-
Free Consultation Available.
ing or teaching or writing about His goodness and His faithfulness. I love it like nothing
else.
I can tell you that He has healed my marriage of past sin and past hurts. He has
taken every hurt in my life and used it for good. He has allowed me to pray some of the
biggest prayers my tiny brain could conceive of and then answered them a gajillion times
bigger than I dared dream. He has blessed me with people in my life who push me to be
more like Him. He has permitted me to see Him change people's lives, and He has blessed
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112 5/21/09 3:55 PM Page 1

Be in She
Coming in August 2009
TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE...
YOUR HEALTH,
YOUR HOME,
YOUR WORK,
YOUR MONEY, HONEY!

If you have taken control

or need help in getting
control of your life, She
would like to hear
from you!

Send a detailed email to

editor@shemagazine.com
with TAKE CONTROL
in the subject line.
Be sure to include a day
and evening phone number.

DEADLINE FOR CONSIDERATION IS JUNE 20.

123 5/25/09 9:46 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 123

Treat that Special Man in your Life to

the time of his life...with a
Gentleman’s Package! BASEBALL
American Legion Field
340 S. Stadium Dr. • 843-629-0700
(Past the Florence Airport on E. Palmetto St.)
All Game Times- 7:30pm unless noted!
Manicure
Pedicure Upcoming Home Games and Events
June 6: Wilmington June 10: Wilmington June 25: Gastonia
Head Massage Inflateables for the kids
6:30-8pm June 12: Wilson
Eagle 92.9 $1 Bud/Coke
Night w/ Wing Specials
Guaranteed Win Night!
Facial June 7: Fayetteville
Faith and Family Night – 5pm
Eagle 92.9 Bud/Coke Night
w/ Wing Specials
June 27: Wilmington
NASCAR Night
Pre-game praise rally 1/2 off General Admission to
Lunch with Lesa Hudson 5pm June 15: Fayetteville
Turner, Padget, Graham & Laney
Fans Wearing Favorite Driver
Apparel. Silent Auction of
June 8: Columbia – Harvest Hope Food Bank Night NASCAR Items to benefit Sam Ard
Crime Stoppers of the Pee Dee Night. 1/2 Off General Admission Ticket w/
K-9 Exhibitions prior to the Donation of 2 or More Can Goods June 30: Fayetteville
game by Florence/Darlington Military Appreciation Night
Sheriff’s Departments June 17: Wilson Free Admission
Free Fan Giveaway with Military ID
Get ready for June 19: Columbia
Groucho’s Deli Stadium Cup July 2: Columbia
something special and Giveaway to the first 400 fans. Eagle 92.9 $1 Bud/Coke
Eagle 92.9 $1 Bud/Coke Night Night w/ Wing Specials
exciting! Sergio w/ Wing Specials. Post game concert
with “Out on Bond” in the beer garden July 4: Fayetteville 7pm
Gutierrez Liquid Metal Spirit of Florence Pre Game Concert
June 23: Wilson with Mid- Life Crisis at 5pm.
Jewelry is coming to Homer’s Birthday Party: Patriotic Parachute Team/Fireworks.
1/2 off General Admission Ticket lorence Toyota/Scion Night
Florence...only at Spa w/ Donation to Florence Area Humane w/ free giveaways
De Vie! Society. Ice Cream & Cake for the Kids Gates open at 4pm

Spa de Vie
Ticket Prices
Group Discounts
6 Box Seats
$

$
5 General Admission & Birthday Party
$
4 Youth (under 10) Senior (60+) Plans Available!
$
3 Military Discount with ID
Salon and Spa
RAINBOW SQUARE •1800 W. PALMETTO STREET FLORENCE • "RED is the Answer to Your Economic Blues"
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124 5/25/09 12:29 PM Page 1

AMAZING!

Sheis
looking for
the Pee Dee’s
most Amazing Women - To nominate an
at home, at work Amazing Woman,
send a detailed email,
and in the along with a day and evening
phone number,
community! to editor@shemagazine.com.
125 5/22/09 2:05 PM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 125

Uterine Fibroids Carolina Facial

Plastic Surgery, P.A.
Symptoms Uterine Fibroids are benign
(noncancerous) tumors that grow on Carla C. Graham, M.D., F.A.C.S.
• Very heavy menstrual or within the muscle tissue of the
bleeding some times
Celeste Young, Licensed Esthetician
uterus. Approximately 20-40% of 492 WEST CHEVES ST. • FLORENCE • 665-0400
with clots
women 35 years and older have
• Pelvic pain or pressure fibroid tumors. Fibroids are more
leading to constipation
common among women of African-
and/or urinary frequency
American descent. don’t hide
• Anemia - resulting in
fatigue due to low blood this summer!
count
• Enlarged abdomen
If you are experiencing any of
these symptoms, you may be a
candidate for Uterine Fibroid
Embolization (UFE). UFE is a
minimally invasive procedure Offering a variety of
designed to block the blood procedures& treatments
supply to these tumors resulting in
resolution of symptoms and to combat the signs of aging.
shrinkage of the tumors. Recovery
time is usually less than one week.

For more information about

UFE, please contact :

{ }
PLASTIC AND
RECONSTRUCTIVE
SURGERY OF THE
HEAD & NECK
Mary Beth Lewis, MD
Florence Radiological Associates 843-777-8893
126 5/26/09 3:29 PM Page 1

Is there one typically male trait that you

think women would benefit from having?

Jane Harris Kathy Epting

Florence Florence

“At times, it would be beneficial to have increased muscle strength. This “Men never remember anything impor tant.
would help when we need to do things that our spouses say ‘Okay’ to Sometimes, I’d like to be the one who forgets.”
doing, but they really mean, ‘I'll do it later.’ ”

Kenyetta Jackson Lindsey Dawkins

Darlington Hartsville

“I think the way men are able to repress their emotions would be “I would like to be able to roll out of bed and
beneficial. Most men can put up an emotional wall; I would love to put on a baseball cap.”
be able to do that. I know men have some of the same problems or
feelings as women, but they are capable of not always showing them.”
127 5/25/09 9:59 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 127

128 5/21/09 2:57 PM Page 1

Be in She
Coming in September 2009
The Annual Style & Fashion Issue

If you (or someone you know)

would like to be considered for a
FABULOUS MAKEOVER , contact
us now!

To enter, send an e-mail telling us

why the makeover is needed, along
with a recent full-length photo to
editor@shemagazine.com.

Be sure to include a day and

evening phone number.

DEADLINE FOR CONSIDERATION IS JUNE 25TH.

129 5/22/09 10:00 AM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 129

hoe!
The nge able S
Original In terc ha

1608 Second Loop Rd.

Mon-Fri: 10am-6pm,
Sat: 10am-2pm
• The Florence Presbyterian Community is a Continuing Care Retirement Closed Sunday
Community, promoting multiple residency and health service options from 843-676-2708
Independent Living Patio Homes and Apartments, to Residential Assisted
Living and Skilled Nursing Care.
•Open to all faiths • Celebrating 50 years of Retirement Living Magnolia Mall
•Stability, Longevity, and Strength...Our Commitment to Excellence David McLeod Blvd.
Inside of Mall on right before
Call for Details, Lunch, and a Tour JC Penny Entrance
mhoward@preshomesc.org Mon-Sat: 10am-9pm,
Sun: 1:30-6pm
2350 W. Lucas St. • Florence • 843-665-2222x114
843-665-8758
Florence • Summerville • Clinton • Columbia • Foothills

First row left to right: Nancy Vivian, Tracey Campbell, Mary Allred, Cathy Stokes, Jacqueline Tonsor
Second row left to right: Melody McCutcheon, Heather Matthews, Beverly Sandifer, Robin Lewis, Carnella Hickson, Barbara Newby

Our nurses have earned the gold standard in South Carolina.

The Palmetto Gold Awards recognize those nurses in our state that best represent excellence in nursing practice and commitment to the
profession. McLeod Health is honored to have had 83 nurses receive this distinction, more than any other hospital in South Carolina,
including the eleven this year that have been added to this very prestigious list.
To this year’s winners and to all the nurses who go above and beyond every day to ensure the best of care for our patients, we say “thank you!”

McLeod Health
www.McLeodHealth.org
130 5/25/09 11:02 AM Page 1

Special Events,

STAY HERE... Bed & Breakfast,

Tours & More

The Grove For Reservations call

843.423.5220
or visit
The Inn on Harlee–Marion, SC www.montgomerysgroveinn.com

GO THERE! (Plan a “staycation” or mother/daughter getaway!)

These are just a few of K a l m i a G a rd e n s

the attractions that

await! Ask us or
visit our website for
BROOKGREEN GARDENS THE STRAND
more ideas!
HARTSVILLE

GEORGETOWN

SHOPPING AT THE BEACH

131 5/21/09 2:52 PM Page 1

She Magazine • June 2009 • 131

“Over the past couple of years, we have had quite a few of our advertisers inquire about paying their accounts
via credit card. I knew this was something She Magazine needed to do for our clients, but after inquiring with a few com-
panies, I became overwhelmed by all the options and neglected making a decision. Richard Marsh sat
down with me and explained the options available and helped me decide on a credit card system that
best suited our business. It was obvious that he cared about my business and wanted to make the
process easy.
Since then, many of our advertisers have taken advantage of the convenience of pay-
ing with a credit card. It has been a very positive move for my business and I am happy to
recommend Richard Marsh and Atlantic Merchant Services.”
- Melia Berry, Editor & Publisher, She Magazine
SPECIALIZING IN:

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132 5/26/09 10:26 AM Page 1

who’s
that
girl?
Future Plans and Dreams:
I’ll be attending Winthrop University in Rock Hill, SC. I hope to get a Degree in
Family: Mommie International Business Chinese so that I’ll be able to market and advertise
(Patricia), Daddy (Robert), American products in China. While attending Winthrop, I’m going to be running
Brother (Galand), and Sisters cross-country and track. My dream is to be a champion in the NCAA one day.
(Lael, Katherine and Macie)

Accomplishments: One Word That Describes

National Honor Society, National Me And My Personality:
French Honor Society,Technical
Honor Society, A/B Honor Roll, Sparkling
Governor’s Citizenship Award

What I Am Most Excited

About Now: I am so excited
If I could meet anyone, it about graduating high school and
being able to start a new career in
would be . . . Steve Prefontaine, running at Winthrop University.
an American middle- and long-dis- There’s no better way to prepare
tance runner. Prefontaine helped myself for this step up to a new level
inspire the “running boom” in the in running than to go to Australia
and compete internationally. I’m so
1970s.
excited as I anticipate this grand trip
– a dream come true.

My Friends: As an Army
brat, I’ve developed friends and What Makes Me Smile:
relationships throughout the Finishing a race with a personal
world. All of them are the great- record and seeing all my teammates,
est. They love to be crazy, have friends and family around me cheer-
fun and not worry about what ing for me as loud as they can.
Favorite Movie:
people think.
A Cinderella Story

Scripture That Inspires Me: If I could travel any-

“I can do all things through Christ who where in the world, I
strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13).
would go to . . . Australia!
And, I am! Since I was a little girl
and saw pictures of Australia,
I’ve dreamed of going there.

Favorite Book: Favorite Song:

Doppelganger “It Happens”
by David Stahler, Jr. Sugarland
Glossy Page 137 5/20/09 9:29 AM Page 1

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(Just off Cashua Dr. across from Celebration Blvd)

FREE Medical Reports Now Available Online! Go to www.scskin.com Or call 24 hr hotline at 800-791-4810.
BE SURE TO ENTER PROMO CODE: JUNE-SHE
Glossy Page 138 5/19/09 3:31 PM Page 1
Glossy Page 139 5/19/09 3:28 PM Page 1

Don’t Suffer
Any Longer!

PAIN MANAGEMENT
IS OUR SPECIALTY.

DR. JOSEPH CARTER

DR. STEPHEN TUEL

New
Location Eastern Carolina Medicine
3124 S. Cashua Drive • Florence, SC • 843.665.2600
3/10 of Mile past Celebration Blvd.