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Brave Men and Women

Brave Men and Women

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Publicado porDharmsen Soni

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Published by: Dharmsen Soni on Jan 26, 2011
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04/06/2015

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case of a husband, we must remember that this love of being occasionally
flattered by his wife is absolutely a necessary and natural virtue. No one
needs to be ashamed of it. We are glad enough to own, to remember, to
treasure up every little word of approval that fell from the lips of the
woman we courted. Why should we forget the dear sounds now she is our
wife? If we love her, she may be sure that any little compliment--an offered
flower, a birthday gift, a song when we are weary, a smile when we are sad,
a look which no eye but our own will see--will be treasured up, and will
cheer us when she is not there. Judiciously used, this conduct is of the
greatest effect in managing the husband. A little vanity does not, moreover,
in such cases as these, prove a man to be either a bad man or a fool. "All
clever men," says a great observer, "are more or less affected with vanity. It
may be blatant and offensive, it may be excessive, but not unamusing, or it
may show itself just as a large _soupçon,_ but it is never entirely absent."
The same writer goes on to say that this vanity should by no means be
injudiciously flattered into too large a size. A wife will probably admire the
husband for what he is really worth; and the vanity of a really clever man
probably only amounts to putting a little too large a price on his merits, not
to a mistake as to what those merits are. The wife and husband will
therefore think alike; but, if she be wise, she will only go to a certain point
in administering the domestic lumps of sugar. "A clever husband," says the
writer we have quoted, "is like a good despot; all the better for a little
constitutional opposition." Or the same advice may be thus put, as it often
is, by a wise and cautious mother-in-law: "My dear," she would say, "you
must never let your husband have matters all his own way."

A woman who abdicates all her authority, who is not queen over her
kitchen, her chamber, and her drawing-room or best parlor, does a very
dangerous and foolish thing, and will soon dwarf down into a mere
assenting dummy. Now old Burleigh, the wise counselor of Queen
Elizabeth, has, in his advice to his son, left it upon record that "thou shalt
find there is nothing so irksome in life as a female fool." A wife who is the
mere echo of her husband's opinions; who waits for his advice upon all
matters; who is lazy, indolent, and silly in her household; fussy,
troublesome, and always out of the way or in the way when she is traveling;
who has no opinions of her own, no temper of her own; who boasts that

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