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RobinMoussa
Dr.KateRosenberg
English137H,Section23
4November2015

ParentingasanAgentforGenderSocializationinEarlyChildhood
Isitaboyoragirl?Expectingmotherscananticipatehearingthisquestiondozensof
timesduringthecourseoftheirpregnancyfromfriends,familymembers,andevenstrangerson
thestreet.Beforeachildisevenborn,its(or,rather,hisorher)genderbeginstodefinewhohe
orsheis.ModernAmericansocietyplacesincredibleemphasisongender,andnow,morethan
everbefore,gendersocializationstartsataveryearlyage.Gendersocializationisdefinedasthe
processbywhichindividualsaretaughtandlearnthevaluesandnormsassociatedwithwomens
andmensrolesinsociety,andthisprocessaffectsapersonsidentity,expectations,andself
esteemthroughouthisorherentirelife(Corrado356).Inbothconsciousandunconsciousways,
parentsraisetheirchildrenusingmethodsthatencouragegenderconformingbehavior.
Startingwithculturalshiftsinthemidnineteenthcentury,gendersocializationinthe
parentingofyoungchildrenhasbecomeincreasinglyintense.Thoughsomemodernsocial
movementsareworkingtoreversethischangeandreturntomoregenderneutralparenting
styles,thevastmajorityofparentscontinuetoembracegenderspecificparentingmethods,
perpetuatingestablishedgendernorms.
Onemajoraspectofparentingthatencouragesgendertypicalbehavioristhelanguage
thatparentsusewhentalkingtotheirchildren.Communicationiskeyforsocialization,and

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parentscommunicatewiththeirsonsanddaughtersinvastlydifferentways.Whendiscussing
childrensemotions,forexample,parentsaremorelikelytotalkaboutsadnesswhentalkingto
girlsbutangerwhentalkingtoboys(Corrado359).Furthermore,parentsunconsciouslyuse
moredescriptivevocabularywhentalkingtogirlsabouttheirfeelingsthanboys,whichcanlead
togreateremotionalintelligenceingirls.Thisexampleisjustoneinstanceofacommonplace
leadingtotheperpetuationofastereotypebecauseparentsbelievethatgirlsaremoreintune
withemotionsbynature,theyraisetheirdaughtersaccordingly,andtheirsonsemotional
intelligencesuffersasaresult.
Theuseofcommonplacesinconversationfurtherreinforcesthedistinctionbetweengirls
andboys.Expressionssuchas,actlikealadyandboyswillbeboysunconsciouslypromote
theideathatgirlsandboysareinherentlydifferent,shouldbeexpectedtobehaveindifferent
ways,andshouldbejudgedaccordingtodifferentstandards.Bothofthesephrasesoriginatedin
themid1800sandhaveseensharpincreasesinpopularitysincethen.
Thedifferenceinlanguagegoesfurtherthanjustwhatparentssay
to
kids,though.What
theysay
about
theirchildrenmattersjustasmuch.Recentresearchhasshownthatwhen
describingyoungboys,wordsdescribingsizeandathleticismaremostcommon,whilegirlstend
tobedescribedintermsofbeautyandkindness(Corrado359).Theselabelsinearlychildhood
canhavelastingconsequences,impactingonesselfimagelaterinlife.
Furtherevidenceoftheshifttowardsgendersocializationinparentingcanbefoundby
lookingatthetoysthatparentsbuyfortheirkids.Aswellasteachingbasicdevelopmentalskills,
toyshelpchildrentounderstandthesocietyinwhichtheyliveandhowtheyfitintothatsociety.

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Therefore,ashiftinthetoysthatchildrenplaywithindicatesashiftinthetypesofmessages
childrenreceiveabouttheirroleintheworld.
ThetoyindustryintheUnitedStateswasrelativelysmallandinconsequentialuntilthe
endoftheAmericanCivilWarin1865whenfactoriesbeganproducingbuildingblocksand
winduptoys.Inaddition,occupationthemedtoysbecamepopular,suchasminiaturetoolsfor
youngboysandfakecookingsuppliesforyounggirls(Cross838).Attheturnofthecentury,
toyshadanotherjumpinpopularity,andmoreelaboratetoyshitthemarket.Chemistrysets,
microscopes,andmodeltrainsweremostpopularforboys,andparentscouldbuytheirdaughters
babydollstoencouragetheirmaternalinstincts.WiththeDepressioneracamealullinthesale
ofexpensiveplaythings,buttheAmericantoyindustrysawonelastmajorshiftinthe1960sthe
introductionofGIJoefiguresandBarbiedolls,whichtookgendersocializationastepfurtherby
definingtheidealformalesandfemales,respectively(Corrado840).
Astoyshavebecomeincreasinglypopularoverthelast150years,sohavestrictnorms
dictatingwhattoysareappropriateforeachgender.Youngboystoystendtofocusonthemesof
combat,construction,athleticism,andintelligence,andgirlstoyspromotenurturing,
motherhood,anddomesticresponsibilities(FormanBrunell14701471).Intoystorestoday,the
dividebetweenboysandgirlstoysisabundantlyclear.Thedistinctionissoembeddedinto
AmericanculturethatevenlargescalefastfoodchainssuchasMcDonaldsaskthechilds
genderbeforedecidingwhichtoytoincludeinhisorherHappyMeal.
Thedifferenceinthewaythatparentstreatboysandgirlsinthisregardseemsto
emphasizesomeinherentdifferencebetweenmalesandfemales,creatinganunnecessarygap
betweenthetwogendersthatmaynotbeentirelyrepresentativeoftherealityofgender.

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Finally,parentsreinforceacceptedgenderrolesinthewaysthattheymaketheirchildren
dress.Throughoutthe1800s,itwasnotuncommonforbabiesandyoungboystoweardresses,
gowns,andskirtsuntiltheageofaboutsixorsevenwhentheymadethetransitiontowearing
breeches.Asthe1900sbegan,however,boysbeganwearingbreechesatyoungerandyounger
agesuntildressesforyoungboyswerecompletelyphasedoutofcommonwear.Untilthistime,
childrensclothinghadlackedanysortofgenderdistinction(Callahan256).Inthe1940s,there
wasanothershiftinchildrensfashionaseachgenderbecamemoretightlyassociatedwitha
particularcolorpinkforgirlsandblueforboys.
Aestheticelementssuchascolorandtypesofgarmentshavenologicalconnectionto
genderandnorealmeaningintermsofwhattheysayaboutmalesandfemales.Clothingonly
servesasanarbitrarywaytodifferentiatebetweenthetwoestablishedgendersandtofurtherthe
ideathatmalesandfemalesaresomehowfundamentallydifferent.Bylimitingthegarmentsthat
aresociallyacceptableformalesandfemales,societylimitsthewaypeopleperceivegender.
Betweenthemid1800sandthepresentday,Americansocietyhasdemonstratedadrastic
changeinthewaythatchildrenareraisedaccordingtothegendertheyhavefrombirth.This
shiftcannotbetracedbacktoonesinglecausebutinsteadtoaseriesofdifferentcauseswhichall
contributedtoachangeinthewaychildrenandgenderareperceived.
Ofthesemanycauses,thetransitiontoapubliceducationalsystemisperhapsthemost
influential.TheUnitedStatesfirstpublicschoolopenedinBostonin1821,andbytheendof
thecenturythenationhadmorepublicschoolsthanprivateones.Theintroductionofpublic
educationmeantthatchildrenwouldbeintegratedintosocietyfromaveryyoungageandthus
expectedtoactinaccordancewithestablishedsocialnorms.Beforepubliceducation,children

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weregivenseveralyearstodiscoverwhotheywereindependentofsocietysinfluence,but
childrenwhoattendedpublicschoolswerequicklyforcedtodefinethemselvesrelativetotheir
peersandteachers.Thisputpressureonparentstoteachtheirchildrenhowtoconformtosocial
normsfromanearlierage.
However,theneweducationalsystemwasnottheonlythingputtingpressureonparents
tosocializetheirchildren.Thedevelopmentofnewmediasuchasfilm,television,radio,and
eventheinternetignitedamajorculturalchange.Massmedialedtotheestablishmentofa
nationalpopculturethatunifiedAmericansandmoreclearlydefinedculturalnorms.Withthis
newstandardizedculturecameanemphasisoncelebritystatus,whichgraduallytransformedinto
anemphasisonfashionandbeauty,forbothmalesandfemales.Thewholenationbeganstriving
forthesameideal,andthisdesiretomeetawelldefinedstandardledparentstobeginraising
theirchildreninwaysthatconformedtothatstandard(Purvis535).
Athirdcauseofgendersocializationinparentingcanbetracedbacktotheworksofjust
onemanpsychoanalystSigmundFreud.Freudbelievedthathumansarebornwithoutgender
andthattheirinteractionswiththeirfamiliesandsocietyshapetheirgenderidentity(Champagne
615).Unfortunately,theeffectsofFreudsworkwerecounterintuitiveand,insomeways,
actuallyservedtoperpetuategendersocialization.BeforethepopularityofFreudswork,
childrenweretypicallyviewedasasexualbeings,butFreudsinsightsonthedevelopmentof
childrensgenderidentityandsexualitycausedpeopletomaketighterconnectionsbetween
childrenandsexuality.
Overthelast150years,therehasbeenaclearandundeniableshiftinthewayparents
socializetheirchildrentoconformtogendernorms,characterizedbyadramaticincreaseinthe

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intensityofgendersocialization.However,thisshifthasmuchgreatereffectsthansimplyhow
individualsrelatetotheirowngenderidentities.Gendersocializationalsoimpactshowsocietyas
awholetreatsmenandwomeninallaspectsoftheirlives.Socializationdefinesthebehaviors
thatareviewedassociallyacceptableformalesandfemales,andplacesunnecessarylimitations
onacceptablecareers,ambitions,andlifestyles,accordingtothegenderthatwasassignedtoa
personatbirthandconstantlyreinforcedthroughouthisorherchildhood.
Worsestill,theemphasisongenderconformityresultingfromgendersocializationforces
peopletoactinwaysthatareingenuineandunnatural.Malesarepressuredtomaintainthe
charadeofmasculinity,embodyingtoughnessandstrength,bottlinguptheirtrueemotions,and
singlehandedlymakingenoughmoneytosupporttheirfamilies.Bycontrast,womenare
expectedtoembracefemininitybymaintainingabeautifulandyouthfulappearance,beingkind
andgentle,andtakingresponsibilityfordomestictasks.
Gendersocializationcanalsocreateconfusioninpeoplewhoarenotcisgender,meaning
theirgenderidentitiesdonotcorrespondwiththegendertheywerebornas.Duringthe
conventionalsocializationprocessinchildhood,thereisnoroomforopenexplorationofgender
identity.Childrenareexpectedtoaligntheirbehaviorwithcisgenderidealsatastageintheir
liveswhengenderidentityisstillamystery.
Finally,byperpetuatingthegenderbinary,thedichotomouscategorizationof
conventionalgenderideals,gendersocializationbreedsprejudiceandsexism.Justasnotall
peopleofanyparticularraceorreligionactacertainway,notallpeopleofanygendercanbe
expectedtoexhibitcertainbehaviors.Whenparentsraisetheirchildrentobelievethatgender
definesidentity,thedifferencesbetweenmenandwomenaredramaticallyexaggerated.Infact,

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withoutthesuggestionofgendersocialization,thedifferencesbetweenmaleandfemalechildren
areminimal(Barnett).Youngboysarenotnaturallymuchmoreassertivethanyounggirls,and
younggirlsarenotnaturallymuchmorenurturing.Thisexampledemonstratesthatthegender
differencesperceivedbysocietygreatlyoverestimatetheactualdifferencesbetweenmalesand
females.
Parentingstylesthatencouragegendernormativebehaviorcancauseconfusion,tension,
andprejudicelaterinlifeandlimitwhatbehaviorsmenandwomencanacceptablyexhibit.
Fortunately,inrecentyears,someparentshavecaughtontothenegativeeffectsofgender
socializationandarebeginningtoembracegenderneutralparentingmethods(Lehne730).
SocialmovementssuchasfeminismandthemovementLGBT+rightshavebeenworkingto
redefinegendernormsandpromoteashiftbacktoandrogynyinchildren.However,centuriesof
gendersocializationcannotbeundoneovernight,anditmaystilltakedecadesbefore
genderneutralparentingbecomesthenewnorm.
Triggeredbyvariousculturalshiftsinthemid1800ssuchaspubliceducation,anational
popculture,andthepopularityofSigmundFreudsideasaboutgender,gendersocializationin
theparentingofyoungchildrenhasbecomeincreasinglyintense.Gendersocializationhashad
profoundimplicationsonthewayAmericansocietyperceivesgenderasawholeandtheway
thatindividualsviewthemselvesandrelatetotheirowngender.Becausetheeffectsofstrict
gendersocializationtendtobeoverwhelminglynegative,modernsocialmovementsarepushing
forlessgenderspecificparentingmethods,butthemajorityofparentstodaycontinueto
encouragegenderconformingbehavior.

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WorksCited

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FormanBrunell,Miriam."Toys."
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Cross,Gary."Toys."
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