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Yessenia Iraheta
Professor Ditch
English 113A
30 September 2015
Two roles in life
People sometimes judge others due to their public appearance. One can see a women
walking by with heels and a dress say that she is feminine, that she may be sensitive and
nurturing. One can also say things about men; a man walking down the street with a suit and a
suitcase would be seen as masculine, and tough and self-reliant. However, there are many people
that show both femininity and masculinity or consider themselves none of those things at all.
This falls under what is known as gender identity. Gender identity is a person identifies
themselves as a gender or even genderless. In these two articles, " Becoming Members of
Society: The Social Meaning of Gender by Aaron Devor, and "No Way My Boys Are Going to
Be Like That" by Emily W. Kane, share a similar connection about genders. Although the two
articles are different from each other, they all share a common idea about gender because they
discuss about coming to terms with gender identification, having gender neutrality slowly be
accepted in western society and how western society set roles on gender identity.
There are people who discover their gender identity as early as three years old. Gender
identification is "one of the most central portion of that developing sense of self"(Devor38). In
Devor's article, he explains how people discover their gender identity as well as how their
behavior and attitudes comes with this choice of them being Feminine or masculine. Devor
speaks about parent influences develops their childs growth. When parents see their child going
through a different path, some start to worry about their child. This relates to Kane's article, No
Way My Boy Are Going to Be Like That", explaining how some parents response negative

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towards their sons playing with toys that are consider for girls because parents say that some toys
are meant for girls and others toys are meant for boys. However many believe that boy and girls
toys should not be sex label.
Although there are negative responses, some parent have positive response towards
playing them. One of the mother's response, for example, talk about how her son and her playing
with toys that are would consider to be what boys should not be playing with. She states, "One
of his first big toys [I got him] was a kitchen center ... We cook, he has an apron he wears ... He's
got his dirt devil vacuum and he's got his baby [dolls]. And he's got all the stuff to feed her and a
highchair"(Kane93). The mother discusses how she is accepting of her son playing with a
kitchen set; making it a positive outlook for her son to learn skills that would help him in the
future. Parenting styles can be reflected on gender norms that society set upon the public and set
expectations for us to follow by. As mentioned Kane's article, it talks about the responses of the
childs parents towards their boys playing with toys that are for girls like kitchen sets, dolls, and
tea sets. Some parents have acceptance with having their sons playing with toys that are meant
for girls but other parents feel that boy should stick to their boy toys. A father talks about his son
putting on nail polish explaining, "No, can't do that, little girls put in nail polish on, little boys
don't" (Kane 93). This shows how some items are seen only for girls and other Items are for
only little boys to parents who does not necessarily agree about having their son play with toys
that are not seen as masculine. Western society forms that norm with having things feminine
items only for girls and masculine items be for only for boys.
Western society set gender roles that make gender identity into for two options. For
example, in Devor's article, it explains how society affects gender identity and the choices
between feminine and masculine. It, as well, ties with Kane's article for it pertains to the parents

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influences on their child growth with the toys they are playing with, which are gender based.
Western society slowly starting to recognize that more people are becoming gender identity as a
genderless choice. They do not identity with either feminine or masculine.
Gender identity, gender neutrality and gender roles made by society has affected my
personally life one way or other. My gender identity mainly has been feminine but I also has
masculine traits as well. I played sports throughout elementary and high school. Playing sports is
a masculine performance as the popular sports are male dominant sports. Through elementary, I
played basketball, flag football, which are sports that are male dominate. I am very competitive
when I playing sports, which is out of the feminine norm as feminine performance is to be ladylike. When I was little, I would plays games with the boys instead of being with the girls from
my class. However at the same time, I would dress, I would put make up on, and I would get my
hair done; there I would show a feminine performance with doing the things that are seen as
girly. When I was little, I was made fun of because I would play with the boys. Back then,
even children would influence by the western society expectations on gender identity. Now, I can
see that back then, people would place people into two categories. If you did not fit into the
category you were supposed to be, you were make fun of or seen as a nonconformist. As for me,
I fit into with being feminine with some masculine performances in my personality, however I
would still identify as being feminine as my gender.
Being gender neutral was something that was practice in my household, but I did not
realize that until I learn about what was gender neutral in college. In my household, they are no
specify gender roles to follow like women should only cook and clean while men take out the
trash or fix anything that is broken around the house. Sometimes my step dad would cook for us
when my mom was busy doing something at work or vice versa. My mother always bought boy

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and girl toys for my sibling; she did not mind when my brother started playing with dolls with
my sister. However, they would also establish traditional value into my brothers, my sisters and I.
My grandmother would tell my sister and me that we need to always be a lady first than
anything. For my brother, my grandma will always tell them to act as a men would by doing
good thing instead of choosing bad decision. Even though we were taught how a girl behave and
how a boy behave in western society and with our traditional values as Latinos, my parent made
it clear to us that it is our choice to be what we wanted in the end. In my household, I did chores
that would vary from washing the dishes to helping my grandfather with fixing a window. In my
childhood, as well as my siblings childhoods, gender neutral lives was able to side by side with
our family traditional values.
Gender role has affected me since I was a little girl however, I did not realize that it was
until I started high school. I went to an all-girl catholic high school where gender roles were
shown in the rules. Our skirts were to be knee length, no pants, no boy cut hair hairstyle and no
looking like a mess; we needed to be groomed neatly. The rules were set that way to make us
look like a proper ladies as way to teach us about looking neat wherever you go as you
represented the school when wearing the inform. In my friend school, which was an all boy
school, they could look a bit messier. It was one rule always stood out to me during my year in
high school. Another rule that stood out to me was a rule about how no boy can have their hair
no longer than above the ear. They were not allow to have long hair that cover the ear nor the
eyes or face. Those rule were put there for reasons that were seen as a good reason so the boys
can be look professional to get into the habit of looking nice at all times. However, I think that it
also a gender role because how some girls and some boys did not get to have a hairstyle or wear
some items of clothes that express who they are because it was going against the rules that were

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apply by the school . I remember asking why we have these rules and one teacher told me that
the reason we had them was because they wanted us to look like the ladies students we were and
for the boys to look as proper men. Gender roles were present in many school as it was present in
modern western society.

Gender identity, gender neutral, and gender roles in all share a common subject of
gender. With the articles and the life experience, as well, help connect the subject all together.
With the connection the show how western society set roles that are present in every life. They
are present when we are picking toys for children even, to rules that we follow. Gender is a topic
that connects with daily life.