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Mark DeGuzman
Professor Ditch
English 113A 3:30PM
9 December 2014
Raising Robots
In the articles, No Way My Boys Are Going to Be Like That: Parents Responses to
Childrens Gender Nonconformity and From Women, Men, and Society, the authors talk about the
different parenting styles according to their childrens gender. It is a clear description of how society has
implemented specific roles to a specific gender. Parents are often eager to find out what the sex of the
baby is, that brings prescribed gender roles. Parenting affects gender structure and in turn played a big
part in my life as a child. Who I am today, were the effects of my parents ideal gender stereotypes,
parenting skills affecting gender structure, and the effects of gender structure causing me to be the
person I turned out to be.
Parents have different styles of raising their children according to their ideal perfect child. It
seems that society has placed a social norm on parenting, ultimately raising their kids to what society
thinks is appropriate. Parents ideal male children are to be athletic, tall, aggressive tone, dominant, and a
great achiever in life, while females are expected to be petite, girlish, passive, and with fine delicate
features. Parents often separate their childrens gender by putting on clothes that noticeably places each
gender according to their sex. Parents want their sons to become aggressive and dominant because with
those characteristics, they can achieve anything in life, be independent, and be the main provider for their
future family. Parents want their daughters to be average or achieve something in life, but the main
thing society has placed them to be is to be maternal and a home house wife. In Renzetti and Currans
article, From Women, Men, and Society states that Even though American parents do not express a
strong sex preference, research shows that parents do have different expectations of their babies and treat

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them differently, simply on the basis of sex (Renzetti& Curran 77). Society does have a social input in
parenting and is portrayed through parenting skills. My parents always had always pictured me to be the
brightest student in class. They expected more from me than my sisters. Ever since I was five, I always
had something to do since I was enrolled in soccer and swimming classes. They wanted me to become
this tall, athletic person because they thought it would be good for me in the future. Nevertheless, if it
came to their idealistic son, on how they should grow up to be, raising me was beyond different than my
sisters. My sisters oftentimes had their way to my dads heart and would get do anything they want from
their daddy, while for me, it was hard to persuade him on getting things that I wanted.
Parents can have a habit of raising their children according to what their ideal child should be,
affecting their childrens gender structure. Parents often saw each gender like males to be easily angered
and active while females are supposed to be easy going and passive with everything. Therefore, parents
styles of raising male children are often aggressive and more restrictive when it came to their sons crying,
on the other hand, female children, imitating the same behaviors, were usually sensitive and responsive to
their daughters crying. Fathers tend to act more aggressive and harsh on their sons, as a way to bulk up
their son to be strong, fearless, and dominant as they grow up. With daughters, they are easily talked to, in
a low monotone voice and caring when it came to the girls. It tends to be that mothers of girls were more
sensitive to their children, while the mothers of boys were more restrictive of their children (Renzetti &
Curran 78). Parents treat their children differently on the basis of sex. Parents use a great number and
variety of emotion words when talking with daughters and sons. They also talk more about sadness with
daughters, whereas they talk about more anger with sons (Renzetti & Curran 79). Parents use different
ways to communicate with their children, and depending on their gender, they act differently so that
society does not perceive us different.
All of these interactions and emotions ultimately causes a change or shapes the genders
structure. Growing up, my dad would always give me toys of cars and trucks while my sisters always had
Barbies and an Easy Bake Oven. Whenever we got in trouble, my sister often has a way out through my

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dads heart, but when it came to me, I thought my life was over. My dad would easily get angry at me or
if Im whining, he would tell me to be quiet and move on with life. I thought my dad cared more for my
sister, but it was only to man me up to be who I am today. If I get hurt, I dont start crying, I let the pain
slide away and that is one of the ways my dad raised me to be. He taught me to grow up and be fearless in
anything because that is how he pictures his son to be, and that is how I became. The experiences I have
went through, is a portrayal of how society socially constructs parenting skills to their children.
The effects of gender structure, causes children to grow and try to fit within a sub-category of
masculinity and femininity. As we grow up, there are all sorts of situations where we try to fit into,
because we were mentally and physically raised according to our gender. Parents who raised their sons to
be tall, athletics, and aggressive, tend to stay in a group with the same social setting. They are around
people with the same likings or same personalities. Hanging with groups that are athletic and doing
manly stuff all because their mentality and personalities was affected due to their parents ideal gender
stereotypes. It is the same thing, when it comes to females, where they placed themselves in a social
setting with the same background as hers. She tends to do shopping, going to a salon, or if being athletic;
she does cheerleading, with the same girls who she might hang out with. All of this is the effect of gender
structure and how parents play a huge role in their lives and future. Consequently, the children cannot
help but conclude that sex is an important social category. By the time they are ready for school, they
already learned to view the world in terms of a dichotomy: his and hers (Renzetti & Curran 85). Children
are grown at point in their lives where they can tell the differences between a boys things, like trucks,
action figures, etc., and girls things, like the color pink, or a Barbie doll, etc.
Growing up, my parents always had an ideal goal or picture of who I was to become. They had a
goal to raise me into this person that society can accept as a whole. As I started to do things on my own,
and use my own mind to see the world, my parents had a huge effect on me. The way I was raised, caused
me to surround myself with the same sex gender because that is how society has spatially forced us to do.
I tend to hang out with the same gender that has the same likings, in terms of: goals, personalities,

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athletic, and overall testosterone in the air. I could say the same thing with my sister, because I see the
group of people she surrounds herself with. She hangs with her own same sex gender, doing what girls
normally would do. Parents do have an effect on gender structure, ultimately shaping our views and
likings to what society has to offer.
On the other hand, society has social influence on childrens lives as well. Children can be gender
constructed by the things they see around them. Society plays a major part in everyone lives and we are
mentally shaped into what society has instructed us to be as. From social media, advertisements, and
celebrity idols all have a major influence on how we should be acting on the basis of gender. For
example, we see in social media, like Facebook as a way to communicate with everyone but also to see
what people are saying about each other. We can be discriminated or made fun of if we do not conform
to gender, so that is why we are always on the lookout to see what men or women should wear and act.
Advertisements can also play a great role in shaping gender structure by releasing to the public, a picture
or comment that spatially instructs us to act according to our gender. We see a picture of a kitchen with a
woman cooking for her family, but we do not see men in the picture cooking also. It portrays that a job
has already been picked out for us on the basis of our gender. Celebrity idols also play a major in shaping
our gender structure, because we look up to them. They may have this type of beauty or fame that we are
so drawn into that we would want to be them. Most celebrities have a dramatic role for their fans as they
would want to be in their shoes. Men and women celebrities are wearing clothes that fit into their gender
and in turn, cause their fans to be styling themselves or acting the way celebrities do. Parenting and
society all plays a major role in shaping gender structure.
Todays American culture, Americans still see society instructing us to fit in a category of
femininity and masculinity. Renzetti, Curran, and Kane expresses their ideas that parenting skills are the
result of societys social construct on us. Parental habits often lead to gender structure, and the effects of
gender structure down the road. Often times, our whole lives are based to what society thinks is proper

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and fitting to each gender, and if we do not conform to it, we are either discriminated or harassed at. All
of these gender specific ideals are what society pictures us to be and act like on the basis of our gender.

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Work Cited
Kane, Emily. "No Way My Boys Are Going to Be Like That! Parents' Responses to Children's
Nonconformity." Gender & Society No. 2 2 (April 2006): n. pag. Web.
Renzetti, Claire M., and Daniel J. Curran. "From Women, Men, and Society." 6 Edition (2011): n. pag.