Learning To Learn: A Literacy Autobiography

Growing up with Dyslexia and its Challenges

By: Khaleb Straight

Have you ever questioned your intelligence and wondered why you are having such a
difficult time with something that seems to come easy to everyone else? It is the worst
feeling in the world and all you want to do is quit.
In preschool all of the kids had a taped off section on the hall floor where we could keep
our backpacks, coats, etc. Our names were on a piece of paper that was also taped to the floor.
I knew my name and I could spell it but for the life of me I could not recognize it written out.
Over and over I practiced making a K, a line with an open alligator mouth just like my
flashcard showed. Yeah, yeah I get it, I know what a K sounds like but why add that H after
the K? How does sounding out my name work then? Do not get me wrong, I love how my
name is spelled. I like not being Kaleb or the even worse Caleb. My name is Khaleb, with
an H; it is strong and it is different. Being dyslexic made recognizing my name a challenge
and that extra letter just made it that more difficult for me to identify. For that piece of paper
taped to the floor, my solution was to just wait for the other kids to put their stuff down before
looking for the spot that did not have anything on it and hope it was mine. To find my spot
later in the day I would have to remember what I brought that day and the general location of
my spot to find it. When I forgot, I would have to walk up and down the hall trying to find my
spot; a lot of the time I would end up needing an adult to help me. It was embarrassing.
It was not until third grade that I learned how to read. Before then, I could read words
that I memorized but not those I needed to sound out, even if I knew what the word was when
it was said aloud. My spoken vocabulary was above average but my reading and writing was

well below average. It was not until third grade that I had memorized what enough words
looked like that I could actually read sentences. I am sure Mrs. Pitts thought she had some
kind of break through with me. Oh, Mrs. Pitts, how I loathed that woman. She had no
patience for me and would snap at me all the time. She was certain I was ADD, ADHD, or
something. I guess I was something and by that I mean I was dyslexic, but she was never
able to put a finger on it. I remember how shocked she was after I was tested for ADD and it
came back that I was not. I remember sitting in on that meeting with Mrs. Pitts and my mom
and Mrs. Pitts being mystified as to how I could not be ADD. In her mind I was supposed to be
ADD that was the problem. It was also during this time that I learned a strategy that both
helped and hurt me - skipping over words that I did not recognize. When skipping over a word, I
would usually be able to get the gist of what the word must have meant by the context of the
rest of sentence or paragraph. This allowed me to read but it also hurt me when the words that
I skipped over were the words that I needed to remember for tests or writing assignments. I
would remember the idea but could not remember the specific word.
When writing papers I had to limit myself to words that I thought that I could spell
correctly or close enough that there would be no confusion over what I wrote. This restricted
the ideas I expressed in writing. This was especially true when I knew I would be marked down
for my spelling. Even when I confined myself, I would still spell words incorrectly and be marked
down for it. I would also spell the same word multiple ways in one writing. Sometimes I would
be unaware that I did this, but other times I did it on purpose in hopes that one of my attempts
were correct. This was my attempt to minimize the amount of times I would be marked down
for spelling a word incorrectly. Luckily in Middle School and High School I started typing

papers. Not that this did not have its challenges. The red squiggle under my misspelled words
helped me see what words I misspelled. Sometimes, though, I spelled the word correctly, I
just did not spell the right word correctly. This word would then go unnoticed. There have
also been times where it shows that I misspelled a word, but it was misspelled so badly that
spellcheck could not even figure out what word I was trying to use. While being able to type
did open my written vocabulary it still does not fully break through the barriers created by
being dyslexic.
I remember studying for spelling tests with my mom or dad and spending hours trying to
remember how each word was spelled. Even after it seemed like I remembered the spelling, I
would spell it incorrectly on the test. This started in elementary school but was also a problem
in middle school and high school. It became so exhausting that I became resistant to even trying
to study and eventually just stopped all together. My grades took a hit, but I felt like my time
and energy was better spent trying to keep up with other homework.
I remember exactly what spelling test put me over the edge. The spelling test was in
Mrs. Pitts room and on that test were the words mom and dad. I remember being
excited because I knew I could spell those words; I had memorized them and could recall
them! After taking the test I knew that I was not going to get a 100% but at least this time I
knew I would not fail. I could not wait to get that test back! Oh how nave I was, I got my test
back and my excitement turned into devastation. I was so confused because I spelled mom
as mom and dad as dad. When I asked what I had done wrong, Mrs. Pitts told me that I
was supposed to capitalize the M for Mom and capitalize the D for Dad. It was at that

very point I decided I was done. I no longer would waste my time trying to learn how spell. I
came to terms with the fact that spelling was just not in the cards for me.
One day in fifth grade I was called down to the office and had no clue why. Panic worthy
to most kids. When I got to the office I was relieved to find out I was called to the office
because my mom was on the phone for me. My mom called to let me know I got into Zoo
School! I knew that I did not get in during the first round so this was absolutely thrilling to hear!
After speaking with my mom I went back to class and told some of my friends the good news.
Later that day I was pulled outside of the classroom by my teacher Mrs. Stahl. She let me know
that she heard some of the students say I got into Zoo School and wanted to know if it was
true. I confirmed that indeed the rumors were true. I remember what her face looked like right
after I said that. She was surprised. Why would she be surprised? Even after I confirmed that I
got into Zoo School she called my mom to make sure. Why? To get into schools like Zoo
School and City High a student needs good grades, good standardized test scores, and good
teacher recommendations. Other than in spelling and writing my grades were good and my
scores on standardized tests were great. As I see it, the only reason she could have been
surprised is if her letter of recommendation was not so flattering. It was most likely my high
scores on standardized tests that pushed me over the edge in the second round to get into
Zoo School.
After Zoo School I got into City Middle and stayed there through high school. I am proud
to say I got into City High in the first round. I did not do well at Zoo School and I know that
neither of the teachers there gave me a great recommendation. Again, it was because of my

standardized test scores as well as how I did on the test City Middle gives students before
letting them in. Going to Zoo School and City High/Middle validated my intelligence but at times
I could not help but question whether I was smart or not. Was I really meant to go to school at
City High/Middle? I did not get As and my grade point average was an embarrassment. I would
weigh whether a reading that should take 45 minutes would be worth the two and a half hours
it would take me to read it. If I had other work to get done my readings got tossed to the side.
As one could imagine, this really hurt me when it came to English class. Spanish was also
another class I consistently did poorly in. I could not spell words in English so trying to learn
how to spell and pronounce words in another language was a bit of a stretch.
I also had a hard time taking notes in class. I would copy each word letter by letter, to
make sure that I spelled it correctly, so that I could reread it later. It would take too long and I
would miss tons of notes. At the same time, I would miss a lot of what the teacher said because
all of my focus would go into copying the notes. There were points where I tried to remedy this
by just not taking notes and giving all of my attention to the teacher. My hope was that by
doing this I would at least hear the information and possibly this would be enough to
remember what was said. Unfortunately, there is only so much you can remember. It was a
good try but this strategy was not very effective.
It was not until I was in 11th grade, after my mom requested for me to be tested, that I
finally found out that I was dyslexic. Let me repeat that, it was not until 11th grade that I was
tested. All these years in education and no one had thought that little Khaleb Straight may
have not been lazy or dumb after all; he may actually have a learning disability. It probably is

not very often that a kid makes it through Zoo School and City Middle and almost all the way
through City High while struggling with an undiagnosed learning disability. I remember during
my IEP meeting I felt happy; I felt like I finally understood why I always had such a hard time
keeping up with my peers. It was then that one of my teachers, Mr. OMalley, decided to
speak up; he said that he did not think that I needed any written plan or accommodations,
and that he would be willing to help me out but he did not want to be forced to do so. As he
spoke those words my heart dropped. I felt like I finally had an answer and this man was
trying to take that away from me. I still do not know why he did this and I never gave him the
time to elaborate. I spoke up for myself and said I disagreed; I think if the test indicated that I
am dyslexic there is no reason to not give me the accommodations that I need. It did not
matter what I said though, the real reason that my accommodations had to be written out
was because if I ever left City High, the school I went to would need to know what
accommodations I needed. After that meeting I felt amazing. We had thought I may have been
dyslexic for a while but it was such a relief to know for sure why I always struggled with reading
and writing. I was so relieved that I did not even care about being labeled with a learning
disability. I also gained a lot of confidence in my intelligence when I found out how I did on the
IQ part of the test.
In high school, they did not provide me with the tools to help manage my dyslexia. The
only real accommodation that helped me was when teachers would print their PowerPoint
slides off for me to take notes on. I really appreciated this but it was not until I got to GVSU that
I found out what it was like to have real accommodations. I am allowed to have my books cut
and converted to text for the computer. This helped because I can have a program read the text

to me. I am also allowed to have a note taker in my classes, which can be super helpful because
it allows me to focus on the lecture. During exams, I am now given extended time and can have
someone read the questions to me if I wish. I think GVSU really gave me the tools I needed to
succeed. I only wish I could have had them during my years at City because I believe that I could
have had a much better GPA and ACT score.
Being dyslexic has been something that has caused me to struggle a lot with school and
question my own intelligence. It is frustrating that it was not until 11th grade that it was
discovered. I look back at my time in elementary, middle, and high school and can only wonder
what kind of student I would have been if it were discovered sooner. Could I have been a 4.0
student? It will be something that I am sure will bother me for some time. I hope to use my
experiences and my knowledge of how much easier learning can be when your individual needs
are met and use it in my classroom with my students. I will do everything I can to make sure
their individual needs are met so that they have the opportunity to be successful and meet
their full potential as learners. Being dyslexic has caused me a difficult time in school and will be
something I struggle with throughout my life and career. I believe though, that I will be a better
teacher for my students because of it.