CULTURE&LIFESTYLE

the

language
of love
...raising a child with autism
Isaiah would squeeze his mothers

cheeks and look into her eyes to tell her

that he loved her. Charissa Cardwell
knew that her son loved her and that he
could understand her I love yous, but
he just didnt know how to communicate
them back. It wasnt until Isaiah was four
years old, that he verbally told Charissa,
I love you . Isaiahs brain works differently and it has taken a lot of work to get
where he is today. Charissa has taught
him how to love and show emotion in the
appropriate way. Some autistic children
are perceived as being unaffectionate
due to their difficulty in perceiving and
expressing typical emotions. However,
Charissa broke that at a young age,
Whether he liked it or not, I was going
to hug him. Isaiah has now had some
issues with being overly affectionate. An
instance happened at school where he
gave a boy an unwelcome hug and the
other boy consequently was upset. Isaiah couldnt understand why there was a
negative reaction, but Charissa was able
to explain why that happened with a social story.
written By Danielle Loparco

48 |

aug / sept 2008

A social story is a set of pictures with

words underneath that depict a social
situation. The visual helps Isaiah understand what the words mean. Many
of the struggles that theyve had to face
are because of the disconnect in communication. Social stories help tremendously in bridging the gap between
words and their meanings and in reducing the anxiety that is brought about by
change. Prior to the social stories, either
Isaiah couldnt understand his mom or
she couldnt understand him. Charissa
remembers the many tantrums that Isaiah had, often in public places because
of their inability to communicate properly.
Isaiah requires extra communication so
that he can process things completely.
The social stories are an integral part of
that communication and are used very
often. If something different is going to
happen the following day (e.g. a field trip
at school), Charissa shows him a social
story of how thats going to look, so that
he can prepare for the change.
From age two to four, Isaiah attended
an early education program. Based on
his social skills, Isaiah was able to start
kindergarten on schedule. Isaiah excels

in math, but has difficulties in reading and

writing. During first grade, Isaiah learned
how to use a pencil to write. Being lowtoned is often one of the symptoms of being autistic. This means that Isaiah had
to learn how to hold the pencil and add
enough pressure to write. Charissa did
exercises with him that taught him how
to do this. First, they started out with her
holding the pencil and him holding on to
her hand, so that he could experience
what it feels like to hold the pencil. Then,
they would switch and he would hold the
pencil and she would add enough pressure, so that the pencil would write. They
work really hard all throughout the year
to make sure that he is always improving and moving forward. Isaiah peaks
at the end of the school year after being
exposed to all of the material and practicing the entire year. Summer school is
very important for him because without it,
he would lose all of the momentum that
had been created throughout the school
year. During the summer he learns a lot
and it helps to keep the material fresh in
his mind.
Their increased communication abilities have allowed Charissa to challenge

CULTURE&LIFESTYLE
Isaiah in ways that she couldnt before.
Because of his sensor issues, there are
many foods that Isaiah wont eat because of the texture. Now, Charissa is
able to negotiate with him and get him
to try foods that he wouldnt touch before. Isaiah has also been able to play
baseball for the first time this year. For
other children, baseball is just a game,
but for Isaiah it was therapy. He had to
practice three times as much as the other
children, but it paid off in the end. There
were frustrating and scary times, but Isaiah and Charissa worked through those
times and Isaiah stuck through it. Isaiah
learned how to throw and catch the ball
and went from hitting the ball and it dropping off the bat, as if it was a bunt, to hitting a home run.
Charissas main focus in life is making
sure that Isaiah is going to be successful. When Charissa found out that Isaiah
had Autism, she didnt break down, she
dealt with it. Thanks to early intervention
and the countless hours that Charissa

has spent working with Isaiah, he

is now high functioning. In prior
years, Charissa worked the night
shift so that she could go to school
with Isaiah. There is a very assured
and confident tone in her voice that
makes you believe in her dreams
and goals for her child. Charissas
passion for instilling a bright future
for her son extends to other children
with Autism and in educating others about this condition. She wants
teachers and students to understand
Autism, so that Autistic children can
be a part of the classroom instead
of just being pushed aside. Charissa has started a program called,
Together for Autism, which raises
money to, ensure that children with
Autism have a summer program that
will focus on maintaining academic
knowledge, improving emotional
regulation, and social skills, as well
as teaching new skills that will benefit them in the upcoming years.

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