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50 wigni, romelic unda waikiTxo, sanam cocxali xar

wigni 30

gamomcemloba palitra L Tbilisi, 2012

UDC (uak) 821.112.2_31 b-692

`50 wigni, romelic unda waikiTxo, sanam cocxali xar~ es proeqti msoflios araerT qveyanaSia popularuli. sxvadasxva gamokiTxvis saSualebiT, mkiTxveli irCevs 50 saukeTeso wigns msoflio literaturis saganZuridan. saqarTveloSi `kviris palitris~ am proeqts mravali aTasi adamiani gamoexmaura. swored maTi dadgenilia im rCeuli wignebis nusxa, romelic `palitramediam~ realur biblioTekad aqcia. es wigni msoflio literaturis am unikaluri biblioTekis nawilia.

Originally published in German under the title `Ansichten eines Clowns~ by Heinrich Bll 1963, 2004 by Verlag Kiepenheuer & Witsch GmbH & Co. KG, Cologne/Germany Targmanze ufleba miRebulia saqarTvelos avtorTa sazogadoebisgan www.sas.ge gamomcemloba palitra L, 2012
yvela saavtoro ufleba daculia.

ISSN 1987-9628 ISBN 978-9941-19-343-9

hainrix bioli

klounis TvalTaxedva
neli amaSukelis Targmani

anemaris
romelTa ar mieTxra misTvis, ixilon da, romelTa ara esma, gulisxma-yon.

1 bonSi rom Camovedi, Ramdeboda. Tavs Zala davatane, rom memoqmeda im avtomatizmis gareSe, xuTi wlis gauTavebeli mogzaurobis Sedegad rom gamomimuSavda: baqnidan Cadi kibeze, adi mopirdapire kibeze, Zirs dade samgzavro CanTa, paltos jibidan amoiRe samgzavro bileTi, mere isev CanTas daavle xeli, Caabare bileTi kontroliors, wadi gazeTis jixurisaken, iyide saRamos gazeTebi, gadi quCaSi da xeliT uxme taqsis. xuTi wlis ganmavlobaSi TiTqmis yoveldRe saidanRac mivemgzavrebi da sadRac Cavdivar. dilaobiT zeviT-qveviT mivuyvebi rkinigzis sadguris kibes, naSuadRevs ki jer qveviT veSvebi, Semdeg zeviT avdivar, xeliT vuxmob taqsis, pijakis jibeSi veZeb mZRolis gasastumrebel fuls, jixurebSi vyidulob saRamos gazeTebs da gulis siRrmeSi vtkbebi _ es ise gamijda Zval-rbilSi, arafers dagidevT. mas Semdeg, rac marim mimatova, raTa im kaTolike ciupfners gahyoloda colad, es procesi kidev ufro meqanikuri gaxda da kvlavac arafers dagidevT. manZils sadguridan sastumromde da sastumrodan sadguramde mxolod erTi ram zomavs _ taqsis mricxveli. sadguridan mricxveli werda xan or, xan sam, xanac oTx-naxevar markas. magram mas Semdeg, rac mari gamSorda, es Cveuli ritmi zogjer irRveva xolme _ sastumro da sadguri erTmaneTSi mereva, matareblis bileTs facifuciT veZeb porties daxlTan, baqnis gasasvlelSi gaCerebul kontroliors ki Cemi oTaxis nomers vekiTxebi. etyoba, raRaca, rasac albaT bedi hqvia, maiZulebs, gavixseno Cemi profesia da isic,
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Tu ra Sav dReSi aRmovCndi. klouni gaxlavarT, oficialurad profesionali komikosi msaxiobi mqvia, arc erT eklesias ar vuxdi xarks, var ocdaSvidi wlis da erT-erT Cems nomers `Camosvla da gamgzavreba~ ewodeba. am usaSvelod gaWianurebul pantomimaSi mayurebelma bolo wuTamde ar icis, Camovedi Tu gavemgzavre. am nomers xSirad kidev erTxel vimeoreb matarebelSi (nomeri Sedgeba eqvsasze meti moZraobisagan da mTeli qoreografia sisxlSi unda mqondes gamjdari). amitom, ra gasakviria, Tu zogjer sakuTari fantaziis msxverpli vxdebi. Sevrbivar sastumroSi, TvaliT veZeb matareblis mimosvlis ganrigs, vpoulob kidec da, imis magivrad, rom Cems oTaxSi avide da warmodgenisaTvis movemzado, avrbivar da Cavrbivar kibeze, raTa matarebels mivuswro. sabednierod, TiTqmis yvela sastumroSi micnoben: xuTi wlis ganmavlobaSi garkveuli ritmi gamomimuSavda da variantebic aq gacilebiT naklebia, vidre Tavidan ggonia. garda amisa, Cemi agenti kargad icnobs Cems xasiaTs da yovelnairad cdilobs, saqmeebi momigvaros. amiT igi pativs scems da xarks uxdis imas, rasac `xelovanis mgrZnobiare suls~ uwodebs da Cems oTaxSi yovelTvis `kargi ganwyobilebis aura~ mxvdeba. lamaz larnakSi yvavilebia da, rogorc ki paltos savarZelze mivagdeb, xolo fexsacmels kuTxisaken movisvri (mZuls fexsacmeli), lamaz mosamsaxure gogos ukve moaqvs CemTvis yava da koniaki da mimzadebs abazanas. mwvane esencia wyals surnelebas aniWebs da nervebs mimSvidebs. vwevar abazanaSi, vkiTxulob mxolod araseriozul gazeTebs, eqvss Tu ara, sams mainc da dabal xmaze vRiRineb mxolod liturgiul sagaloblebs, qoralebs, himnebs, sekvenciebs, romlebic skolis merxidan CamrCa mexsierebaSi. Cemi mSoblebi, marTlmorwmune protestantebi omis Semdeg gavrcelebul rjulSemwynareblobis modas ahyvnen da kaTolikur saswavlebelSi mimabares. piradad me religias zurgi vaqcie, eklesiaSic ki ar davdivar da liturgiul teqstebsa da melodiebs samkurnalo mizniT viyeneb: sagaloblebi yvelaferze metad mexmarebian, moverio im or sens, romlebiTac bunebam damajildova _ melanqoliasa da Tavis tkivils. mas Semdeg, rac mari kaTolikeebTan
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gadabargda (mari TviTonac kaTolikea, magram aseTi gamoTqma mainc marTebulad mimaCnia), orive seni ufro gamimwvavda da Tantum Ergo1 da `litania lauretana~2, aqamde rom yvelaze metad miqarvebdnen tkivils, axla ZlivsRa mSvelian. arsebobs sxva wamalic _ alkoholi, romelic droebiT mSvelis. Cemi saboloo gankurneba maris SeeZlo, magram, samwuxarod, marim mimatova. klouni rom smas daiwyebs, ufro swrafad daeSveba Zirs, vidre mTvrali meTunuqe gadavardeba saxuravidan. roca scenaze mTvrali gavdivar, zustad veRar vasruleb moZraobebs, romelTa gamarTleba mxolod sizustes SeuZlia, da zogjer iseT Secdomas vuSveb, klounisaTvis Tavis moWras rom udris: mecineba sakuTar oxunjobaze. amaze damamcirebeli araferia. roca fxizeli var, scenaze gasvlamde sul ufro da ufro mipyrobs SiSi (xSirad xelis kvriTac ki magdeben scenaze) da is, rasac zogierTi kritikosi `fiqrnarev kritikul mxiarulebas~ uwodebda, `romlis miRmac gulis Zgera ismis~, sxva araferi iyo, Tu ara gamToSavi sasowarkveTileba, romelic xels miwyobda marionetad gadavqceuliyavi. cud dReSi maSin vvardebodi, roca Zafi wydeboda da sakuTari Tavis amara vrCebodi. albaT, raRac amdagvars ganicdis beri mistikuri ganWvretis dros. mari yovelTvis Tan daaTrevda aTasgvar mistikur literaturas da, ramdenadac maxsovs, am wignebSi xSirad wavwydomivar sityvebs `amao~ da `arara~. sami kvira yoveldRe mTvrali viyavi da scenaze gasvlisas macdunebeli Tavdajerebuloba meufleboda. Sedegmac ufro male iCina Tavi, vidre es zarmac mowafes emarTeba. igi xom niSnebis furclis miRebamde iluziebiT imSvidebs Tavs _ naxevari weli sakmaod didi droa saocnebod. sami kviris Semdeg Cems oTaxSi yvavilebi aRar idga, meore Tvis Sua ricxvebSi abazaniani nomeri aRar mRirsebia, mesame Tvis damdegs ki sadguridan ukve Svidi markis manZilze vcxovrobdi, xolo
Tantum Ergo (laT.) _ `ramdenadac asea~ _ kaTolikuri locvis, wminda gvamis himnis `aJRerdi, enav~ me-5 strofis dasawyisi.
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`litania lauretana~ _ locva loretos netari qalwuli mariamisi.

Cemi gasamrjelo erT mesamedze Semcirda. varietes kari momixures. sadRa iyo koniaki _ arays masmevdnen. warmodgenas vmarTavdi uRimRamod ganaTebul scenaze, Cabnelebul darbazebSi, sadac yovlad ucnauri kavSirebi sxdomebs atarebdnen. vinRa fiqrobda arazust moZraobebze, lamis vpampulobdi da ase varTobdi iubilarebs: rkinigzelebs, fostisa da sabaJos moxeleebs, kaTolike diasaxlisebs, evangelist medicinis debs, bundesveris oficrebs, romlebic saswavleblis damTavrebas ludis smiT aRniSnavdnen da zeimis dasamSveneblad me miwvevdnen, Tumca xeirianad isic ki ar icodnen, hqondaT Tu ara sicilis ufleba, roca Cemi erT-erTi Zveli pantomimis, `Tavdacvis sabWos~, gacveTil narCenebs vuCvenebdi. guSin ki boxumSi axalgazrdebis winaSe momixda gamosvla. Caplins vbaZavdi, uecrad fexi damicda, adgoma veRar SevZeli. aravis daustvenia, mayureblebi TanagrZnobiT CurCulebdnen. bolos, roca farda CamouSves, koWlobiT gavedi scenidan, mTel Cems bargi-barxanas Tavi movuyare da ise mivaSure pansionats, rom grimic ki ar momicilebia. pansionatSi erTi aurzauri atyda: Cemma diasaxlisma mZRolis gasastumrebeli fuli ar masesxa da gaavebuli mZRoli imiT davaSoSmine, rom eleqtrosamarTebeli giraod ki ara, gasamrjelod miveci. sabednierod, wesieri kaci aRmoCnda da xurdad sigaretis gaxsnili kolofi da ori marka damibruna. tangauxdeli mivegde gauSlel sawolze, boTlSi CarCenili arayi gamovwrupe da am bolo TveebSi pirvelad vigrZeni, rom aRarc melanqolia mawuxebda da aRarc Tavis tkivili. mTvrali, wumpeSi amogangluliviT, swored ise vegde sawolze, rogorc bevrjer minatria, netavi ase davlio dRe-meTqi. erTi peSvi aryisTvis ukanasknel perangs gavimetebdi, magram imdeni laparakis Tavi ar mqonda, aseT garigebas rom sWirdeba xolme. mxolod aman amaRebina xeli ganzraxvaze. meZina SesaniSnavad, magram damesizmra, TiTqos scenis mZime farda rbil, sqel sudarasaviT gadamefara, rogorc dabinduli madli, magram buranSi wasulma ZilSive vigrZeni, rogor Semipyro gaRviZebis SiSma. saxe grimiT maqvs moTxupnili, marjvena muxli gamisivda,
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plastmasis langarze iseTi sauzme devs, pirs ver daakareb, yavadanTan ki Cemi agentis depeSa gdia: `koblencma da maincma uari SemoTvales. saRamos bonSi dagirekavT. conereri~. mcire xnis Semdeg damireka im kacma, vinc saRamos marTavda. mxolod axla gavige misgan, Turme qristianTa ganaTlebis saqmes xelmZRvanelobda. _ qosTerTi gaxlavarT, _ momesma mliqvneluri, msusxavi xma. _ Tqveni gasamrjelos sakiTxi xom unda gavarkvioT. _ keTili, amas win ra udgas, _ vupasuxe me. _ viTom? _ mkiTxa man. me vdumdi. kacma laparaki ganagrZo. axla mis uferul, msusxav xmaSi sadisturi bgerebi aJRerda. _ adre SevTanxmdiT, rom gasamrjelod as markas gadavuxdidiT klouns, romelic im dros orasi mainc Rirda. am sityvebs dumili mohyva, albaT imisaTvis, rom gavexelebine, magram me krinti ar damiZravs. Tavi veRar Seikava da Cveuli TavxedobiT ganagrZo: _ me sazogadoebrivad sasargeblo kavSirs vxelmZRvanelob da sindisi nebas ar maZlevs, asi marka gadavuxado klouns, visTvisac oci markac ki bevria. Cveni mxriv, esec didi xelgaSlilobaa. araviTari sababi ar mqonda, dumili damerRvia. amitom sigarets movukide, wyalwyala yava davisxi da mis qoSins mivayurade. _ Tu mismenT mainc? _ mkiTxa man. _ diax, gismenT, _ vupasuxe da kvlav Cavikminde xma. dumili kargi iaraRia. skolaSi, roca direqtorTan an kolegiaze mibarebdnen, yovelTvis jiutad vdumdi. ara uSavs, gaiwuros oflSi telefonis xazis meore boloSi Camokidebuli qristiani batoni qosTerTi. aseT gulnamceca kacunas, aba, rogor Sevecodebodi. samagierod, sakuTari Tavis Secodeba SeZlo da bolos Caiburtyuna: _ rames xom ar metyviT, batono Snir? axla ki amoviRe xma. _ kargad damigdeT yuri, batono qosTerT. ai, ras getyviT: CabrZandiT taqsiSi, midiT sadgurze, miyideT pirveli kla9

sis bileTi bonamde, miyideT erTi boTli arayi, mobrZandiT sastumroSi, gadaixadeT Cemi danaxarji, moaxlis gasamrjelos CaTvliT, damitoveT konvertiT imdeni fuli, rac taqsiT sadguramde misvla Rirs da, garda amisa, gaficebT Tqvens qristianul sindiss, gamigzavneT Tqveni xarjiT bargi bonSi. Tanaxma xarT? qosTerTma TavisTvis raRac iangariSa, Caaxvela da miTxra: _ ormocdaaT markaze metis gadaxdas ar vapirebdi. _ keTili, _ vuTxari me, _ maSin tramvaiT imgzavreT da es yvelaferi ormocdaaT markaze naklebi dagijdebaT. Tanaxma xarT? man kvlav raRac daiangariSa da miTxra: _ ar SegiZliaT bargi taqsiT waiRoT? _ ara, vupasuxe me, _ fexi vitkine da bargis Trevis Tavi ara maqvs. etyoba, qosTerTma qristianuli sindisis Zlieri qenjna igrZno. _ batono Snir, _ miTxra lmobierad, _ vwuxvar, rom me... _ rogor gekadrebaT, batono qosTerT, _ vuTxari me, _ bednieri var, rom SemiZlia dagazogvinoT qristianuli saqmisaTvis ormocdaToTxmeti Tu ormocdaTeqvsmeti marka. berkets xeli davaWire da yurmili aparatis gverdiT davde _ qosTerTi iseTi tipi iyo, SeeZlo kidev erTxel daereka da karga xans eybeda. sjobs, marto darCenilma sakuTar sindisSi moafaTuros xeli. cudad viyavi. damaviwyda meTqva, rom marto melanqolia da Tavis tkivili ki ara, kidev erTi, TiTqmis mistikuri Tvisebac mawuxebs: telefonis meSveobiT sunsac aRviqvam, qosTerTs ki abebis motkbo suni asdioda. iZulebuli gavxdi, wamovmdgariyavi da kbilebi gamexexa. fskerze darCenili aryis wveTebi pirSi gamovivle, grimi gaWirvebiT movicile, isev loginSi Cavweqi da daviwye fiqri marize, protestantebze da kaTolikeebze. warmovidgine momavali, vfiqrobdi im wumpezec, romelSic odesme aucileblad aRmovCndebodi. roca klouni ormocdaaT
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wels miatans, misTvis mxolod ori gza arsebobs: an wumpe, an sasaxle. sasaxleze ar miocnebia, radgan ormocdaaT wlamde ocdaor welze meti maqvs saTrevi. koblencma da maincma rom uari SemomiTvales, conereri amas `pirvel sagangaSo~ safexurs daarqmevda. CemTvis ki miswreba iyo, _ damaviwyda meTqva, rom kidev erTi Tviseba maqvs: gulgriloba. wumpe bonSic bevria, Tanac gana vinmem damiwesa, maincdamainc ormocdaaT wlamde moicadeo? momagonda mari, misi xma, mkerdi, xelebi, Tma, misi moZraobebi da yvelaferi is, rasac erTad vakeTebdiT. momagonda ciupfneri, romelsac mari colad unda gahyoloda. bavSvobaSi Cven sakmaod kargad vicnobdiT erTmaneTs, ise kargad, rom, roca davaJkacebulni kvlav SevxvdiT, arc ki vicodiT, SenobiT gvelaparaka Tu TqvenobiT. orive mimarTva uxerxuli gveCveneboda da, roca erTmaneTs vxvdebodiT, uxerxulad vgrZnobdiT Tavs. ver gamigia, raRa maincdamainc mas mietmasna mari, magram, iqneb, marTlac arasodes `mesmoda~ marisi? gavcofdi, raRa swored qosTerTi gamotyvra da gamomarkvia fiqrisgan. ZaRliviT fxaWnida kars da bolos miTxra: _ momismineT, batono Snir, eqims xom ar gamovuZaxo? _ momwydiT Tavidan, _ vuyvire me, _ SemoacoceT konverti karis qveS da wabrZandiT saxlSi. roca qosTerTma konverti karis qveS Semoacoca, sawolidan wamovdeqi, konverti aviRe da gavxseni. konvertSi aRmoCnda meore klasis bileTi boxumidan bonamde da zustad naangariSebi taqsis fuli: eqvsi marka da ormocdaaTi pfenigi. imedi mqonda, aT markamde mainc daamrgvalebda, da vvaraudobdi, ramdeni damrCeboda, roca pirveli klasis bileTs fasdaklebiT Cavabarebdi salaroSi da meore klasis bileTs viyiddi. Cemi angariSiT xuT markas mainc movigebdi. _ yvelaferi rigzea? _ momesma garedan. _ diax, _ vupasuxe me, _ waeTrieT aqedan, binZuro qristiano WiaRuav! _ rogor gekadrebaT? _ SemomZaxa man. _ waeTrieT! _ avRrialdi me.
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siCume erT wams Tu gagrZelda. Semdeg gavigone, rogor daeSva kibeze. miwis Svilebi zecis SvilebTan SedarebiT marto Wkvianebi ki ara, ufro adamianurnic da sulgrZelnic arian. aryisa da sigaretisaTvis rom cotaodeni fuli damezoga, sadguramde tramvaiT wavedi. pansionatis diasaxlisma im depeSis Tanxac miangariSa, wina saRamos monika zilvss rom gavugzavne bonSi _ qosTerTma ar isurva am danaxarjis gadaxda. ase rom, sadguramde taqsisTvis mainc ar meyofoda fuli. depeSa manamde gavgzavne, sanam gavigebdi, rom koblencma miwvevaze uari miTxra. uaris Tqmas me TviTon vapirebdi, magram imaT damaswres. cotaTi esec maRizianebda. ajobebda, me TviTon SemeTvala depeSiT uari: `muxli maqvs mZimed daSavebuli. warmodgenas ver gavmarTav~. kidev kargi, rom monikas depeSa gavugzavne: `xvalisaTvis damaxvedreT dalagebuli bina. guliTadi salami. hansi~. 2 bonSi yovelTvis yvelaferi sxvagvarad xdeboda. am qalaqSi arasodes gamovsulvar scenaze. bonSi ubralod vcxovrobdi da taqsis rom daviWerdi, sastumroSi ki ara, sakuTar binaSi mivyavdi. jobda meTqva: Cven mivyavdiT, mari da me. Cvens saxls portie ar hyavs, rom sadguris kontroliorSi amerios. miuxedavad amisa, sakuTari Weri, sadac weliwadSi mxolod samioTxi kvira Tu gamitarebia, CemTvis yvela sastumroze ucxoa. bonSi Casulma Zlivs Sevikave Tavi, rom taqsi ar momexmo. es Jesti ise mqonda Sesisxlxorcebuli, rom kinaRam uxerxul mdgomareobaSi aRmovCndi. jibeSi erTi markaRa medo. gareT kibeze gavCerdi da jibeebi moviqeqe, Tu maqvs-meTqi Tan gasaRebebi: sadarbazosi, binisa, saweri magidis ujrisa, sadac velosipedis gasaRebi devs. didi xania vfiqrob, Sevqmna pantomima gasaRebebze: yinulis gasaRebebis mTeli acma warmodgenis msvlelobaSi TandaTan dneba. taqsis fuli swored maSin ar mqonda, roca cxovrebaSi pirvelad marTla mWirdeboda taqsi. muxli gamisivda. sadguris moedani gaWirvebiT gadavWeri koWlobiT da fosTSTraseze Se12

vuxvie. Cveni bina sadguridan ori wuTis savalzea, magram axla gza usasrulo momeCvena. mcire xniT sigaretis avtomats miveyrdeni da Tvali Sevavle im saxls, romelSic babuaCemma bina maCuqa. koxta binebs lamazad Seferili, mopirkeTebuli aivnebi amSvenebs. saxli xuTsarTuliania da xuTive sarTuls erTmaneTisagan gansxvavebuli aivnebi aqvs, Ria an muqi ferisa. mexuTe sarTulze, sadac yvelaferi Jangisferia, me vcxovrob. SeiZleba, im wuTSi swored Cemi axali pantomima warmovidgine? gasaRebi sadarbazos karis budeSi Sevacure da sulac ar gamkvirvebia, rom ar dadna. Semdeg liftis kari gavaRe, mexuTe Rilaks TiTi davaWire da odnav xmauriT zeviTken daviZari. liftis viwro fanjridan vxedavdi derefnis erT nawils, xolo derefnis fanjridan _ mziT ganaTebuli Zeglis zurgs, moedans da eklesias, Semdeg isev Savi monakveTi da betonis iataki moCanda, xolo cota mogvianebiT, odnav Secvlil rakursSi, isev mziT ganaTebuli Zeglis zurgi, moedani da eklesia gamoCnda. ase ganmeorda samjer, meoTxe sarTulidan mxolod moedani da eklesia Canda, mexuTe sarTulze asulma ki sakuTari binis kari gavaRe da sul ar gamkvirvebia, rom kari advilad gaiRo. Cems binaSi yvelaferi Zalian Jangisferia: karebi, kafeli, ganjinebi. aqaurobas Zalian mouxdeboda Sav taxtze wamowolili moJangisfro-wiTel xalaTSi gaxveuli qali. SeiZleba, aseTi qalis xelSi Cagdeba arc gamWirveboda, magram me mxolod melanqolia, Tavis tkivili, gulgriloba da telefoniT sunis aRqmis mistikuri unari ki ara, erTi saSineli senic mawuxebs _ monogamiisadmi midrekileba. amqveynad arsebobs erTaderTi qali, visTanac SemiZlia imis gakeTeba, rasac mamakacebi qalebTan akeTeben. es qali aris mari da mas Semdeg, rac man mimatova, beriviT vcxovrob. es kia: beri ara var. erTxel azrad momivida, sofelSi wavsuliyavi da Cemi Zveli skolis erT-erTi mRvdlisaTvis rCeva mekiTxa, magram yvela mRvdels adamiani poligamiur arsebad miaCnia, amitomac eqomagebian ase gulmodgined erTcolianobas. me maT albaT urCxuli vegonebi da maTi rCeva sxva araferi iqneba, Tu ara qaragmuli miTiTeba im savaneze, sadac, rogorc fiqroben, siyvaruli iyideba. pro13

testantebisagan jer kidev moveli raRac sakvirvels _ qosTerTma marTlac moaxerxa Cemi gaoceba, magram kaTolikeebi veRarafriT gamakvirveben. erT dros kaTolicizmis mimarT didi simpaTiiT viyavi ganwyobili, maSinac, am oTxi wlis win marim pirvelad rom mimiyvana `progresul kaTolikeTa wreSi~. maris guliT undoda, gaecno CemTvis inteligenti kaTolikeebi. cxadia, faruli azric amoZravebda, iqneb erT mSvenier dRes rjuli Seicvaloso (aseTi faruli azri yvela kaTolikes utrialebs TavSi). am wreSi gatarebuli pirvelive wuTebi saSineli iyo. maSin ocdaori wlisac ki ar viyavi, klounis xelobas veuflebodi da Savi dRe madga _ dilidan daRamebamde vvarjiSobdi. im saRamos didi sixaruliT velodi, varjiSisagan qancgawyvetils imedi mqonda, rom mxiarulad gavatarebdi dros, miveZalebodi karg Rvinos, Seveqceodi gemriel kerZebs, SeiZleba, mecekva kidec (Cven ise xelmokled vcxovrobdiT, Rvinoc gvenatreboda da gemrieli saWmelic), magram yvelaferi sul sxvanairad moxda _ Rvino ar daileoda, xolo saRamo... aba, rogor giTxraT, daaxloebiT ase warmomidgenia uniaTo profesoris seminari sociologiaSi. es yvelaferi araTu damqancveli, zedmetad da arabunebrivad damqancvelic ki iyo. jer erTad iloces, me ki am dros ar vicodi, sad wameRo xelebi da rogor damemala saxe. Cemi azriT, urwmuno kaci aseT mdgomareobaSi ar unda Caayeno. maT rom mxolod Cveulebrivi locva `mamao Cveno~ an `Ave Maria~ wamoewyoT, CemTvis esec sakmaod saCoTiro iqneboda, radgan protestantulad aRmzardes da miveCvie, marto viloco, roca da sadac momexasiaTeba. isini ki kiTxulobdnen kinkelis mier SeTxzul programul teqsts `da Cven gevedrebiT Sen, mogvec Zala, raTa ganurCevlad mivuzRoT sakadrisi damkvidrebulsac da aRmavalsac~ da ase Semdeg. bolos gadavidnen saRamos Temaze `siRatake im sazogadoebaSi, sadac vcxovrobT~. aseTi saSineli saRamo Cems cxovrebaSi iSviaTad mqonia. ver gamigia, ratom unda iyos religiur Temaze saubari ase damqancveli. vici, Znelia irwmuno aseTi religia, mkvdreTiT aRdgoma da maradiuli arseboba. yovelive es Zneli dasajerebeli unda iyos. mari xSirad miki14

Txavda biblias. mogvianebiT kierkegoris kiTxvac ki daviwye (damwyebi klounisaTvis sasargeblo sakiTxavia). marTalia gamiZnelda, magram ar davqanculvar. ar vici, iqneb, arian adamianebi, romlebic pikasos an klees suraTebs pawia sufrebze qargaven, magram im saRamos ise momeCvena, TiTqos es progresuli kaTolikeebi Toma aqvinelis, francisk asizelis, bonaventuras da papi leo XIII-is naazrevisagan iqsovdnen TeZoebze Semosaxvev Cvrebs, rac, cxadia, maT siSiSvles ver faravda, radgan (Cem garda) damswreTagan aravis hqonda aTas xuTas markaze naklebi Tviuri Semosavali. TviTonac ise uxerxulad grZnobdnen Tavs, rom bolos cinizmsa da snobizms amoefarnen. gamonakliss mxolod ciupfneri warmoadgenda; igi ise gaawama mTelma am ambavma, rom sigaretic ki mTxova. mis cxovrebaSi es iyo pirveli sigareti, romelsac umweod abolebda da me SevamCnie, rom uxaroda, roca kvamli saxes ufaravda. maris mdgomareoba mawuxebda, radgan gafiTrebuli ijda da TrToda, xolo kinkeli am dros anekdots hyveboda: erTi kaci Turme TveSi xuTas markas iRebda da ara uSavda ra, Tavi gahqonda. cota xnis Semdeg aTasi marka dauniSnes. SeamCnia, rom cxovreba gauWirda. xolo roca misma Semosavalma jer ori aTas markas miaRwia, bolos ki sami aTasamde avida, isev aewyo cxovreba. kinkelma Tavisi brZnuli gamocdileba Semdegnairad Camoayaliba: `Tu TveSi xuTas markamde iReb, araferi giWirs, xuTasidan sami aTas markamde ki did siduxWires ganicdi~. kinkelma verc ki SeamCnia, ra Caidina: bevrs laybobda, eweoda msxvil sigaras, xSirad mihqonda pirTan RviniT savse Wiqa, sanslavda yvelian kverebs da yovelive amas olimpiuri simSvidiT akeTebda. bolos misma saqcielma wris sulieri moZRvari prelati zomervildic ki SeaSfoTa. igi Seecada saubris Tema Seecvala. zomervildma, mgoni, xelCasaWidi sityva `reaqcia~ Seapara da kinkeli maSinve wamoego ankesze. aiwyvita, gacofda, gaaxura moxseneba imaze, rom Tormeti aTasad Rirebuli avtomanqana ufro iafi jdeba, vidre oTxiaTasxuTasiani da Sua laparakSi gaCumda. amjerad misma colmac ki, romelic qmars aRmerTebda da unaklod miaCnda, SvebiT amoisunTqa.
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3 es pirveli SemTxveva iyo, roca sakuTar binaSi Tavi TiTqmis kargad vigrZeni. aq siTbo da sisufTave sufevda. roca palto sakidze davkide da gitara kuTxeSi mivayude, gavifiqre, bina iqneb cota mets niSnavs, vidre Tavis motyueba-meTqi. erT adgilas fexis mokideba miWirs. es, albaT, ase iqneba yovelTvis. am mxriv mari Cemze uaresia, magram mainc arCia, sabolood sxvis budeSi mokalaTebuliyo. arada, iseTi droc maxsovs, Tu erT kviraze metxans miwevda romelime qalaqSi gamosvla, mari awrialdeboda xolme. monika zilvss axlac iseTi gulisxmiereba gamoeCina, rogorc yovelTvis, roca ki depeSas vugzavnidiT: saxlmmarTvelisaTvis gasaRebi gamoerTmia, yvelaferi daesufTavebina, saerTo oTaxSi yvavilebi daedga, macivari nair-nairi sursaTsanovagiT gamoevso, samzareulos magidaze dafquli yaviT savse kolofi ido, mis gverdiT _ koniakis gauxsneli boTli. saerTo oTaxSi sigaretebi damxvda magidaze, xolo yvavilebis gverdiT anTebuli sanTeli iRvenTeboda. monika zogjer uCveulod mgrZnobiarea, SeuZlia sentimentaluric ki iyos da amis gamo xandaxan gemovneba Ralatobs. magidaze dadgmul sanTels xelovnuri naRvenTi hqonda, rac, cxadia, ver daakmayofilebda `kargi gemovnebis damcveli kaTolikuri wris moTxovnebs~. etyoba, am facifucSi sxva sanTels ver miagno an Zviri, gemovnebiT SerCeuli sanTlis sayidlad fuli ar eyo. uecrad vigrZeni, rom swored am ugemovno sanTlis gamo Cemi sinaze monika zilvsisadmi im zRvars uaxlovdeboda, romlis gadalaxvis saSualebas ar maZlevs Cemi avbediTi midrekileba monogamiisadmi. kaTolikuri wris sxva wevrebi verasodes gabedavdnen, ugemovnoba an zedmeti mgrZnobiaroba gamoeCinaT. diax, isini TavianT sisustes arasodes gamoamJRavneben da Tu rame SeeSlebaT, urCevniaT zneobis sferoSi Secdnen, vidre ugemovnoni aRmoCndnen. Cems binaSi jer kidev idga monikas sunamos surneleba, misTvis metismetad mZafri da moduri. am nazavs mgoni `taiga~ hqvia. monikas nayidi sigareti monikas sanTelze movukide, samza16

reulodan koniaki gamovitane, winkaridan ki telefonis wigni da yurmili aviRe. monikam imazec izruna, rom telefoni CarTuli yofiliyo. zumeris wkriali usazRvrod farTo gulis Zgerad momeCvena. imwams es xma ufro miyvarda, vidre zRvis Relva, qariSxlis sunTqva an lomis brdRvinva. am mkveTr bgerebSi Cateuliyo maris xmac, leos xmac da monikas xmac. yurmili nela davde. es erTaderTi iaraRiRa damrCa da male gamoviyenebdi kidec. Sarvlis marjvena toti avikece da daSavebuli muxli SevaTvaliere. muxli msubuqad mqonda dabeJili, odnav SeSupebuliyo. koniaki did WiqaSi Cavasxi, naxevramde davcale da danarCeni mtkivan muxlze davisxi. Semdeg koWlobiT gavedi samzareuloSi da koniaki macivarSi Sevdgi. mxolod axla gamaxsenda, rom qosTerTma mainc ar momitana daTqmuli arayi. albaT, ifiqra, pedagogiuri TvalsazrisiT, ase ajobebso, da amiT protestantul eklesias Svidi marka dauzoga. gadavwyvite, damereka misTvis da am Tanxis gamogzavna momeTxova. ZaRlis naSobi ase iolad ar unda damZromoda xelidan. esec rom ara, fuli mWirdeboda. xuTi wlis ganmavlobaSi gacilebiT met fuls vSoulobdi, vidre unda damxarjoda da mainc Semomelia. cxadia, rogorc ki muxli momirCeba, ise rogor wavxdebi, pampulaobaSi ocdaaTi-ormocdaaTi marka ar momcen. CemTvis sulerTia, sad momiwevs gamosvla _ uxeiro darbazebSi mayurebeli ufro simpaTiuric kia, vidre varieteebSi. magram dReSi ocdaaTi-ormocdaaTi marka metismetad cotaa, xolo iaffasiani sastumroebis oTaxebi _ metismetad patara. repeticiis dros magidebsa da karadebs vejaxebi. Tanac, me Tu mkiTxavT, arc abazanaa fufuneba da taqsic ar aris mflangveloba iseTi kacisaTvis, xuT Cemodans rom daaTrevs Tan. macivridan koniaki gamoviRe da erTi ylupi pirdapir boTlidan movsvi. loTi ara var, magram mas Semdeg, rac marim mimatova, alkoholi Svebas mgvris. garda amisa, ufulobasac gadaveCvie da is ambavi, rom jibeSi erTi marka medo da uaxloes momavalSi am Tanxis mniSvnelovnad gazrdis araviTari imedi ar mqonda, aSkarad manerviulebda. erTaderTi nivTi, romlis gayidvac SemeZlo, velosipedi iyo, magram Tu moxetiale jam17

bazobas movkidebdi xels, velosipedi Zalian gamomadgeboda, mixsnida taqsisa da matareblis xarjisagan. binis mflobelic im pirobiT viyavi, rom misi arc gayidva SemeZlo da arc gaqiraveba. Tavs Zala davatane, koniaki rom ar damelia, saerTo oTaxSi gavedi da telefonis wigni gadavSale. 4 davibade bonSi. am qalaqSi uamrav xalxs vicnob. maT Soris arian naTesavebi, nacnobebi, skolis amxanagebi. aqve cxovroben Cemi mSoblebi da Cemi Zma leo, romelmac ciupfneris zegavleniT rjuli Seicvala, gakaTolikda da axla Teologias swavlobs. aucileblad unda movinaxulo mSoblebi, Tundac imisaTvis, rom Cemi finansuri saqmeebi movagvaro. Tumca am saqmis mogvareba SemiZlia veqils davavalo. es sakiTxi jer kidev gadasawyvetia. mas Semdeg, rac Cemi da henrieTe daiRupa, mSoblebi CemTvis aRar arseboben. henrieTes sikvdilis dRidan Cvidmeti weli gavida. omi is-is iyo mTavrdeboda. henrieTe, mSvenieri, qera gogona, maSin Teqvsmeti wlisa iyo da bonsa da remagenSi CogburTis saukeTeso moTamaSed iTvleboda. im dros axalgazrda qaliSvilebs mouwodebdnen, nebayoflobiT Caweriliyvnen sazenito samxedro nawilebSi da henrieTec Caewera. es moxda 1945 wlis TebervalSi. yvelaferi ise swrafad da daubrkoleblad mogvarda, rom me verafers mivxvdi. skolidan momavali, kiolnis quCaze gadavedi da uecrad bonisaken daZrul tramvaiSi henrieTe davinaxe. man gamicina da xeli damiqnia. mec gavucine. henrieTes zurgze CanTa ekida, Tavze lamazi, muqi lurji qudi exura da Tbili, sayeloze bewvSemovlebuli zamTris palto ecva. arasodes minaxavs, henrieTes rom Tavze rame xureboda, qudis daxurvaze yovelTvis uars ambobda. qudma Zalian Secvala, axalgazrda qals hgavda. eqskursiaze Tu midis, gavifiqre CemTvis, Tumca eqskursiisaTvis aSkarad Seuferebeli dro iyo. magram maSindeli skolebisagan yvelaferi iyo mosalodneli. maswavleblebi TavSesafarSic ki cdilobdnen SeeswavlebinaT CvenTvis ariTmetikis samTa wesi im dros, roca Cvens smenamde qvemexebis srolis xma aRwevda, xolo maswavle18

beli briuli gvamRerebda, misi sityvebiT rom vTqvaT, `saTnoebiT savse erovnul simRerebs~ da aseTebad miaCnda `gimzers didebiT mosili saxli~ da `aRmosavleTiT vxedav ganTiads~. RamRamobiT, roca naxevari saaTiT siCume daisadgurebda, italieli samxedro tyveebis (skolaSi agvixsnes, axla ratom aRar iyvnen italielebi Cveni mokavSireebi da ratom vamuSavebdiT datyvevebulebs, magram dRemde ver gamigia, ratom), rusi tyveebis, tyve qalebisa da germaneli jariskacebis fexis xma mesmoda. mTeli Rame ismoda mwyobri nabijebis xma. danamdvilebiT aravin icoda, ra xdeboda. me marTlac ise momeCvena, TiTqos henrieTe skolidan eqskursiaze mihyavdaT. maTgan yvelaferi iyo mosalodneli. zogjer, roca gangaSidan gangaSamde saklaso oTaxebSi visxediT da fanjridan Tofis srolis xma mkafiod gvesmoda, Tu SeSinebulni fanjrisaken mivabrunebdiT Tavs, maswavlebeli briuli gvekiTxeboda, Tu iciT, es ras niSnavso. Cven es raxania vicodiT; zeviT, tyeSi kvlav xvretdnen dezertirebs. _ es dRe elis yvelas, vinc gabedavs da uars ityvis wmidaTawmida germanuli miwis dacvaze ebraeli iankebisagan, _ gveubneboda briuli (amas winaT kidev erTxel Sevxvdi ukve daberebul, gaWaRaravebul briuls, romelic axla pedagogiuri akademiis wevria da icnoben, rogorc `umwikvlo politikuri warsulis mqone pirs~, aqaoda, arasodes yofila nacisturi partiis wevrio). kidev erTxel davuqnie xeli mimaval tramvais, romelSic henrieTe ijda da Cveni parkis gavliT saxlisaken gavwie. Cemi mSoblebi da leo magidas Semosxdomodnen. sadilad ori kerZi gvqonda: wvniani da kartofili sawebliT, xolo desertad TiTo vaSli. mxolod desertis dros vkiTxe dedas, henrieTes skolam eqskursiaze saiT gaswia-meTqi? dedas gaecina da miTxra: _ eqskursia? ra sisuleles ambob: henrieTe imisaTvis wavida bonSi, rom sazenito samxedro nawilSi Caeweros. ase sqlad nu Tli vaSls. Semomxede, Cemo biWiko! _ man Cemi TefSidan naTali aiRo, mocicqna da Tavisi xelmomWirneobis nayofi, vaS19

lis sifrifana naWrebi pirisken waiRo. me mamas Sevxede, magram mama TefSs dasCereboda da xmas ar iRebda. leoc Cumad ijda. mzera isev dedaze gadavitane da maSin man lmobieri, nazi xmiT miTxra: _ erTi ram unda gesmodes: imisaTvis, rom germaniis wminda miwidan ebraeli iankebi ganvdevnoT, Tavisi vali yvelam unda moixados. dedam ise gadmomxeda, elda meca, xolo roca leosac aseve Sexeda, momeCvena, sadacaa Cvenc uyoymanod gagvgzavnis-meTqi brZolis velze ebraeli iankebis winaaRmdeg sabrZolvelad. _ Cveni wminda germanuli miwa, _ dasZina man, _ isini ukve eifelis SuagulSi SemoiWrnen. sicilis gunebaze davdeqi, magram uneburad cremli wamskda. xilis dana movisrole da Cems oTaxSi gaviqeci. SiSma Semipyro. isic vicodi, risic meSinoda, magram amis gamoxatvas ver vaxerxebdi da roca is wyeuli vaSlis naTali magondeboda, boRma maxrCobda. gavcqerodi Cveni baRis WuWyiani TovliT dafarul germanul miwas, rains, mtirala tirifebis miRma aRmarTul Svid mTas da mTeli es dekoracia saSinel uazrobad meCveneboda. erTxel mec ki vnaxe ramdenime `ebraeli ianki~, venusbergidan sabargo manqanebiT qveviT Camoiyvanes bonis Sesakreb punqtSi: gaToSili, SeSinebuli axalgazrdebi sacodavad gamoiyurebodnen. Tuki saerTod raime asociacias iwvevda CemSi ebraeli, ufro italielebs vamsgavsebdi, isini amerikelebTan SedarebiT imdenad ufro gaToSilni da daRlilni Candnen, rom SiSis Tavic ki aRar hqondaT. Cemi sawolis gverdiT mdgar skams fexi vkari da radgan ar waiqca, kidev erTxel vuTavaze wixli. bolos, rogorc iqna, skami waiqca da patara magidis SuSa gatexa. lurjqudiani da zurgCanTiani henrieTe aRar dabrunebula da Cven dRemde ar viciT, sad aris damarxuli. roca omi damTavrda, CvenTan viRac movida da gviTxra: `leverkuzenTan brZolaSi daeca~. roca warmovidgen, rom mura naxSiris mompovebeli sazogadoebis aqciebis didi nawili Cveni ojaxis ori Taobis xelSia, wminda germanuli miwisaTvis drtvinva sasacilo meCveneba.
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ager ukve samocdaaTi welia, rac Snirebi qvanaxSirs iReben, xels iTboben, wminda germanuli miwa ki iZulebulia, es moiTminos. soflebi, tyeebi, cixe-darbazebi eqskavatorebisagan ise ingreva, rogorc ieriqonis kedlebi. mxolod ramdenime dRis Semdeg gavige, vis SeeZlo hqonoda `ebrael iankebze~ saavtoro uflebis pretenzia _ herberT qaliks, Tormeti wlis lawiraks, Cems fiurers iungfolkSi. dedaCemma mas sulgrZelad dauTmo Cveni parki, sadac yvelas unda Segveswavla tanksawinaaRmdego reaqtiuli xelyumbarebis xmareba. yumbaris srolas Cemi rva wlis Zma leoc swavlobda. erTxel imasac movkari Tvali, rogor miabijebda CogburTis moednis gaswvriv mxarze gadebuli saswavlo xelyumbariT. am dros iseTi seriozuli saxe hqonda, rogoric mxolod bavSvebs SeiZleba hqondeT. gavaCere da vkiTxe: _ aq ras akeTeb? leom momakvdinebeli seriozulobiT mipasuxa: _ minda vervolfi gavxde, Sen ara? _ rogor ara, _ vupasuxe da masTan erTad gavemarTe tirisaken, sadac herberT qaliki swored im dros hyveboda, rogor miiRo erTma aTi wlis biWma pirveli xarisxis rkinis jvari Soreul sileziaSi, sadac man tanksawinaaRmdego xelyumbarebiT sami rusuli tanki mospo. erT-erTma biWma hkiTxa, ra erqvao im gmirs da uecrad me wamoviZaxe: _ riubecali1! brazisagan saxegafiTrebulma herberT qalikma miyvira: _ binZuro dezertiro! me davixare da herberTs saxeSi mTeli muWa nacari Sevayare. yvela me meca, mxolod leo idga ganze, tiroda da ar mexmareboda. SeSinebulma, herberTs pirSi mivaxale: _ nacisto Roro! es sityvebi rkinigzis gadasasvlelTan wavikiTxe, Slagbaumze. zustad ar mesmoda, ras niSnavda, magram imwams iseTi grZnoba mqonda, rom droulad gamoviyene. herberT qalikma Tanam1

riubecali (germ. miT.) _ mTis suli, jujebisa da qvesknelis meufe.

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deboba SeiSno, cema-tyepas bolo mouRo, me damapatimra da sanam Cems mSoblebs, maswavlebel briulsa da partiis erT-erT warmomadgenels moiyvanda, tiris fardulSi Camketa, sadac samizneebi da saCvenebeli joxebi eyara. simwrisagan vRmuodi, samizneebs fexiT vTelavdi da gareT yaraulad dayenebul biWebs gavZaxodi: `nacisto Rorebo!~ erTi saaTis Semdeg Cvens saxlSi SemaTries da dakiTxva damiwyes. maswavlebel briuls Zlivs akavebdnen: _ movspoT, gavacamtveroT! dRemde ar vici, igi Cems fizikur mospobas gulisxmobda, Tu zneobrivad gacamtverebas. istoriuli WeSmaritebis dadgenis mizniT, erT mSvenier dRes werils mivwer pedagogiur akademias da vTxov, es sakiTxi ganmimartos. ufro gonivrulad iqceoda partiis warmomadgeneli, adgilobrivi organizaciis xelmZRvanelis moadgile liovenihi, romelic yvelas eubneboda: _ angariSi gauwieT imas, rom biWi jer TerTmeti wlisac ar aris. misma qcevam imdenad damamSvida, rom pasuxic ki gaveci kiTxvaze, saidan ici es saSineli sityvebio. _ anabergerSerSTrasesTan rom Slagbaumia, imaze wavikiTxe. _ iqneb, vinmem gaswavla? _ mkiTxa man, _ imis Tqma minda, vinmes piridan xom ar gaigone? _ ara, _ vupasuxe me. _ biWma arc ki icis, ras ambobs, _ Tqva mamam da mxarze xeli damado. briulma jer borotad Sexeda mamas, Semdeg ki damfrTxalma gadaxeda herberT qaliks _ mamas qceva Cemdami mxardaWerad miiCnia. atirebulma dedaCemma ki Tavisi nazi, suleluri xmiT Tqva: _ TviTon ar icis, ras sCadis, marTla ar icis, Torem namdvilad xels aviRebdi masze. _ netav, marTla aiRebda xels? _ vTqvi me. mTeli es ambavi xdeboda veeberTela saerTo oTaxSi, sadac dgas Seferili muxis aveji, mZime, sarkeebiani wignis karadebi, muxis paneliT mopirkeTebuli kedlebis gaswvriv damagrebul
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Taroze babuaCemis samonadireo nadavli da Tasebi alagia. eifelidan, romelic ociode kilometriTaa daSorebuli Cvengan, qvemexebis srolis xma da SigadaSig tyviamfrqvevebis kakanic mesmoda. qera, gafiTrebuli herberT qaliki, romelsac saxeze fanatizmi ewera, prokuroris movaleobas asrulebda, mokakul TiTebs gauCereblad akakunebda servantze da moiTxovda: _ simkacre, simkacre, ulmobeli simkacrea saWiro! ganaCeni aseTi gamomitanes: herberTis zedamxedvelobiT parkSi tanksawinaaRmdego sangari unda gameTxara. Snirebis tradiciuli sadilis Semdeg germanuli miwis Txras Sevudeqi, Tumca sakuTari xeliT miwis Txra Snirebis tradicias ewinaaRmdegeboda. sangars vTxridi babuaCemis sayvareli vardis buCqebis gardigardmo, apolon belvederelis qandakebis aslis mimarTulebiT da winaswar maxarebda is wami, roca Cems gulmodgine Txras marmarilos qandakeba msxverplad Seewireboda. magram Cemi sixaruli naadrevi aRmoCnda. igi Seiwira patara, Worflianma biWunam, romelsac georgs eZaxdnen _ SemTxveviT tanksawinaaRmdego yumbara xelSi gauskda, TviTonac afeTqda da apolonic aafeTqa. herberT qalikma es ubeduri SemTxveva lakoniurad ganmarta: _ sabednierod, georgi oboli iyo. 5 telefonis wignidan im xalxis nomrebi amoviwere, visTanac darekva momiwevda: marcxniv Camovwere imaTi gvarebi, visganac SemeZlo fuli mesesxa: karl emondsi, hainrih beleni. orive Cemi skolis amxanagia, erTi odesRac Teologias swavlobda da axla gimnaziis maswavlebelia, xolo meore _ kapelani. maT Semdeg modioda bela brozeni, mamaCemis sayvareli. marjvena mxares Camovwere imaTi sia, visac ukidures SemTxvevaSi vTxovdi fuls: Cemi mSoblebi, leo (leosaTvis yovelTvis SemeZlo meTxova fuli, magram arasodes aqvs, radgan Tu rame abadia, yvelas urigebs), kaTolikuri wris wevrebi: kinkeli, fredeboili, bloTerti, zomervildi. am or svets Soris Ca23

vwere monika zilvsi da misi saxeli lamaz maryuJSi Cavsvi. karl emondisaTvis depeSa unda gamegzavna da meTxova, TviTon daereka CemTan, radgan telefoni ara aqvs. yvelaze adre siamovnebiT davurekavdi monikas, magram iZulebuli var, yvelaze bolos davureko, Cveni urTierToba iseT stadiaSia, roca adamianis arad Cagdeba fizikuradac da metafizikuradac uzrdelobad iTvleba. am mxriv mZime mdgomareobaSi aRmovCndi. mas Semdeg, rac mari `metafizikurma SiSma~ Seipyro (es misi sityvebia) da gameqca, Cemda uneburad, beriviT vcxovrob, radgan Cems monogamur bunebas veraferi movuxerxe. gulwrfelad rom vTqva, boxumSi gangeb waviforxile da muxliT daveci, mindoda dawyebuli turne Semewyvita da bonSi Camovsuliyavi. araadamianurad mtanjavda is, rasac maris religiur wignebSi SecdomiT `xorcieli Jini~ hqvia. monika ise Zalian miyvarda, arafriT SemeZlo momekla masTan sxva qalis ndomiT gamowveuli Jini. uxeSi gamoTqma iqneboda, religiur wignebSi rom daeweraT `ndoma qalisa~, magram `xorciel Jins~ bevrad ajobebda. ar vici, ras vuwodo xorci, Tu ara imas, sayasboSi rom kidia, Tumca mTlad xorci arc is aris. sakmarisia warmovidgino, mari imasve akeTebs ciupfnerTan, rac mxolod CemTan unda gaekeTebina, da melanqolias sasowarkveTilebamde mivyavar. didxans vyoymanobdi, momeZebna Tu ara ciupfneris telefonis nomeri, magram bolos mainc vipove da imaTTan Cavwere, visganac fulis sesxebas ar vapirebdi. mari fuls maSinve momcemda, momcemda yvelafers, rac ki gaaCnda. miT umetes, Tu gaigebda, rom am xnis ganmavlobaSi xeli mecareboda, cxadia, movidoda da damexmareboda, magram saqme is aris, rom marto ar movidoda. eqvsi weli drois didi monakveTia. ara, maris araferi esaqmeba ciupfneris saxlSi da mis loginSi. ratom unda sauzmobdnen erTad, erT sufrasTan? erTi piroba isic ki gadavwyvite, marisaTvis mebrZola, magram es sityva CemTvis raRac fizikurTanaa dakavSirebuli _ sasacilo iqneboda ciupfnerisaTvis Cxubi gamemarTa. mari jer kidev ar iyo CemTvis mkvdari. ai, dedaCemi ki namdvilad mkvdari iyo. mwams, zo24

gierTi cocxali mkvdaria, zogierTi mkvdari ki cocxali, magram ara im azriT, rogorc es protestantebsa da kaTolikeebs swamT. CemTvis is biWi, georgi rom erqva da tanksawinaaRmdego xelyumbarasTan erTad afeTqda, ufro cocxalia, vidre dedaCemi. apolonis qandakebis win gaSlil mdeloze cxadad vxedav Worflian, mouqnel biWs, romelsac herberT qaliki uyviris: `ase ki ara, ai, ase~... mesmis yumbaris afeTqebis xma, aqa-iq wamokivleba, umetesobas arc wamoukivlia, mere ki qalikis SeniSvna: `sabednierod, georgi oboli iyo~. mesmis is sityvebic, naxevari saaTis Semdeg, savaxSmod gawyobil sufrasTan dedam leos rom uTxra: _ Svilo, Sen am iaraRs im CerCet biWze ukeT xom moixmar! leom Tavi dauqnia. mamam me gadmomxeda, magram Tavisi aTi wlis vaJis TvalebSi sanugeSo veraferi ipova. mas Semdeg gavida dro, dedaCemi ager ukve ramdeni welia `rasobriv winaaRmdegobaTa momrigebeli sazogadoebebis~ centralur komitets Tavmjdomareobs. zogjer ana frankis saxlSi miemgzavreba, xolo Tu SemTxveva mieca _ amerikaSic, sadac qalTa klubebSi sityvas warmoTqvams germaneli axalgazrdobis codvebis monaniebaze im Tavisi nazi, uwyinari xmiT, romliTac albaT gamomSvidobebisas henrieTes uTxra: `yoCaRad iyavi, Svilo~. dedaCemis xma yovelTvis SemiZlia movismino telefonis yurmilSi, magram henrieTes xmas veRarasodes movismen. henrieTes uCveulod dabali xma hqonda da wkriala sicili icoda. erTxel, CogburTis TamaSis dros, Cogani xelidan gauvarda, moedanze gaSeSda da ocnebamoreuli miaCerda cas. meored, sadilobisas, kovzi wvnianSi Cauvarda. deda akivlda, awuwunda, kaba dagilaqavda, sufra daisvarao, magram henrieTes araferi gaugonia, xolo roca gons moego, kovzi wvnianidan amoiRo, xelsaxociT gawminda da Wama ganagrZo. mesamed, roca buxarTan kartis TamaSis dros henrieTes kidev daemarTa raRac amdagvari, dedaCemi seriozulad gabrazda da uyvira: _ isev im wyeulma ocnebam Segipyro! _ mere ra moxda, mombezrda kartis TamaSi.
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am sityvebis warmoTqmisTanave henrieTem karti, romelic jer kidev xelSi eWira, buxarSi mogizgize cecxlSi Cayara. dedam TiTebi ki daiwva, magram karti, garda gulis Svidianisa, romelic cotaTi Seitrusa, uvneblad gamostaca cecxls. mas Semdeg Cvens ojaxSi kartis TamaSi yovelTvis henrieTes gvagonebda. Tumca deda cdilobda, Tavi ise daeWira, TiTqos araferi momxdara. deda srulebiT ar aris boroti qali, ubralod, warmoudgenlad suleli da momWirnea. axali karti ar gvayidvina da mgoni dResac im Serujuli gulis SvidianiT TamaSoben. dedaCems albaT araferi agondeba, roca pasianss Slis da es Svidiani xelSi xvdeba. didi siamovnebiT davelaparakebodi telefoniT henrieTes, magram Teologebs jer ar gamougoniaT aparati amgvari laparakisaTvis. Cemi mSoblebis telefonis nomeri yovelTvis maviwydeba da amitom telefonis wignSi movnaxe: `Snir alfonsi, sapatio doqtori, generaluri direqtori~. CemTvis siaxle sapatio doqtori iyo. sanam nomers avkrefdi, fiqrebSi saxlisaken gavwie, Cavyevi koblencis quCas, gavedi eberTaleeze da marcxniv, rainisaken gavuxvie. fexiT TiTqmis erTi saaTis savalia. am dros telefonisti gogos xma momesma: _ doqtor Sniris bina gaxlavT. _ qalbaton SnirTan dalaparakeba msurs. _ vin brZandebiT? _ Sniri, _ vupasuxe me, _ zemoxsenebuli qalbatonis RviZli Svili, hansi. telefonistma nerwyvi gadaylapa, Semdeg erTi wamiT dafiqrda da me eqvsi kilometris manZilze vigrZeni, rom daibna. suni sasiamovno asdioda, sapnisa da frCxilebze axalwasmuli laqis. etyoba, icoda, rom amqveynad varsebob, magram rogor moqceuliyo, aravis daurigebia. cxadia, Cem Sesaxeb saeWvo Worebi CaawveTes yurSi _ garewari, amrev-damreviao. _ vinaa imis Tavdebi, rom ar mexumrebiT? _ mkiTxa man bolos. _ darwmunebuli brZandebodeT, _ vupasuxe me, _ Tu saWi26

roa, SemiZlia CamogiTvaloT dedaCemis gansakuTrebuli niSnebi. marcxniv, tuCebs qvemoT, xali aqvs, meWeWi ki... _ kmara, _ miTxra siciliT gogom da telefoni gadarTo. Cvens saxlSi rTuli satelefono sistemaa. marto mamaCems sami sxvadasxva xazi aqvs: wiTeli _ mura naxSirisaTvis, Savi _ birJisaTvis, xolo TeTri _ kerZo saubrebisaTvis. dedas gankargulebaSi mxolod ori telefonia; Savi _ rasobriv winaaRmdegobaTa momrigebeli sazogadoebebis centraluri komitetisaTvis da TeTri _ kerZo saubrebisaTvis. Tumca dedas pirad angariSze bankSi, im grafaSi, sadac `saldo~ weria, eqvsniSna cifria Casmuli, satelefono an amsterdamsa da sxva qalaqebSi mogzaurobis xarjebs centraluri komiteti unazRaurebs. telefonistma SecdomiT Savi telefoni CarTo. dedaCemma yurmili aiRo da saqmianad mipasuxa: _ gismenT rasobriv winaaRmdegobaTa momrigebeli sazogadoebebis centraluri komiteti. ena Camivarda. mas rom eTqva, qalbatoni Sniri gaxlavarTo, albaT, vetyodi, hansi var, deda, rogor xar-meTqi, magram amis nacvlad vuTxari: _ ebraeli iankebis centraluri komitetis delegati gelaparakebaT. bonSi var gavliT, Tu SeiZleba damakavSireT Tqvens qaliSvilTan. meve SemaSina iman, rac vTqvi. dedam jer wamoiyvira, Semdeg mZimed amoioxra da mivxvdi, rogor daberebula. _ Sen amas, albaT, arasodes daiviwyeb, ara? _ miTxra man. Tavadac Zlivs Sevikave cremli da Cumad vuTxari: _ saWiro kia amis daviwyeba, deda? igi erTxans dumda da uecrad momesma CemTvis esoden Tavzardamcemi dedabruli tirili. deda xuTi weli ar menaxa da axla igi samocs iqneboda mitanebuli. erTi wuTiT isic ki davijere, TiTqos dedas marTlac SeeZlo telefoni gadaerTo da henrieTesTan davekavSirebine. aki, yovelTvis ambobda: `Tu movindome, zecasac davukavSirdebi telefoniT~. cxadia, xumrobda _ dRes xom sakuTar telefonze yvela ase
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laparakobs: me, Cemo kargo, pirdapiri xazi maqvs partiasTan, universitetTan, telestudiasTan da Sinagan saqmeTa saministrosTano. rogor mindoda henrieTes xma gamegona, Tundac marto `araferi~ an `nexvi~ eTqva. am sityvas ise ityoda xolme, sulac ar JRerda uxamsad. sakmarisi iyo Sniclers henrieTes `mistikur niWze~ Camoegdo laparaki da henrieTe maSinve miaxlida: `nexvi~. da es sityva ise lamazad JRerda, rogorc `nergi~ (Snicleri mwerali iyo, erT-erTi im muqTaxoraTagani, omis dros Cvens ojaxSi rom cxovrobdnen). roca henrieTes `Tavisi mouvlida~, Snicleri yovelTvis mistikur niWze Camoagdebda sityvas. amis Tqma da henrieTes pasuxi `nexvi~ erTi iyo. henrieTes sxva ramec SeeZlo eTqva: `is suleli folenaxi dRes isev davamarcxe~ anda romelime franguli fraza: `La condition du Monsieur le comte est parfaite~1. zogjer henrieTe gakveTilebis momzadebaSi mexmareboda. yvelas sicils hgvrida is ambavi, rom sxvebis gakveTilebi kargad icoda, Tavisi ki _ cudad. magram henrieTes xmis magivrad dedaCemis dedabruli tirili mesmoda da amitom vkiTxe: _ rogoraa mama? _ ah, mama moxucda, moxucda da dabrZenda, _ miTxra man. _ leo? _ o, leo bejiTia, metismetad bejiTi da mas did momavals uwinaswarmetyveleben TeologiaSi, _ mipasuxa dedam. _ o, RmerTo Cemo, _ vTqvi me, _ raRa maincdamainc leos momavali unda iyos dakavSirebuli TeologiasTan! _ Cven didad gvewyina, roca man rjuli gamoicvala, magram adamianis sulier miswrafebebs win vin aRudgeba, _ miTxra dedam. dedam kvlav savsebiT daimorCila xma da erTi wuTiT macdunebeli survili gamiCnda, mekiTxa misTvis Snicleris ambavi, romelic Cvens ojaxSi axlac miRebuli kacia. xorcsavse, napaLa condition du Monsieur le comte est parfaite (fr.) _ batoni grafis mdgomareoba brwyinvalea.
1

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tivebi, germanelTa Rirsebis grZnobiT Sepyrobili vaJbatoni Snicleri im dros keTilSobiluri evropeizmiT iyo gatacebuli. mogvianebiT cnobismoyvareobam mZlia da wavikiTxe misi erTi romani `frangis siyvaruli~. wigni ufro mosawyeni aRmoCnda, vidre saTauri gafiqrebinebda. gasaocrad originaluri masSi mxolod is iyo, rom mTavari gmiri, tyve frangi leitenanti qera gaxldaT. xolo gmiri qali, mozeleli germaneli gogona _ Savgvremani. Snicleri yovelTvis krTeboda, roca henrieTe ityoda `nexvi~, _ es albaT orjer Tu moxda, magram Snicleri mainc irwmuneboda, rom mistikuri niWi SeiZleba savsebiT esadagebodes `salanZRavi sityvebis wamoyrantalebis dauokebel survils~ (Tumca henrieTes araviTari dauokebeli survili ar ubiZgebda da zemonaxseneb sityvas ki ar wamoayrantalebda, piriqiT, Cveulebrivad ambobda xolme), Tan amis dasadastureblad gioresis xuTtomian `qristianul mistikas~ miaTrevda. Snicleris romanebs, cxadia, daxvewiloba ar aklda. Tundac, ai, es rad Rirs: `franguli Rvinoebis saxelebi ise JRers, TiTqos broli wkrialebs, roca Seyvarebulebi erTmaneTs adRegrZeleben da Wiqebs uWaxuneben~. romani mTavrdeba saidumlo qorwinebiT da swored amis gamo daatyda maSin Tavs Sniclers imperiis mweralTa palatis wyroma: aTiode TviT wera aukrZales. amerikelebma ki, rogorc winaaRmdegobis moZraobis monawiles, Tavze xeli gadausves da kulturis dargSi samuSaod miiwvies. axla igi bonSi daqris da, Tuki SemTxveva mieca, hyveba, faSisturi reJimis dros beWdva amikrZaleso. Tumca aseT pirmoTne vaJbatons arc sWirdeba tyuilis Tqma, Tavis saqmeebs isedac agvarebs mudam. amave dros dedaCems swored man STaagona, nacistebTan gavegzavneT, me _ iungfolkSi, xolo henrieTe _ `germanel qaliSvilTa kavSirSi~. _ aseT dros, mowyaleo qalbatono, erTmaneTs gverdSi unda vedgeT, erTad vibrZoloT, erTad vitanjoT. axlac cxadad vxedav: mogugune buxarTan dgas Snicleri da xelSi mamaCemis sigara uWiravs. _ zog-zogi usamarTloba, romlis msxverplic me gavxdi, veraviTar Crdils ver miayenebs Cems naTelsa da obieqtur
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damokidebulebas movlenebisadmi. vici, _ am dros marTla aukankalda xma, _ vici, Cveni mxsneli iaraRi fiurers ukve xelSi uWiravs. da amas ambobda daaxloebiT erTi dRiT adre, sanam amerikelebi bons daipyrobdnen. _ marTla, Snicleri rogor brZandeba? _ vkiTxe dedas. _ SesaniSnavad, _ mipasuxa man, _ sagareo saqmeTa saministro erT nabijsac veRar dgams umisod. dedaCems, ra Tqma unda, yvelaferi daviwyebuli hqonda. sakvirveli is iyo, rom `ebraeli iankebis~ xsenebaze raRac mainc gaaxsenda. amitomac ar vnanobdi, ase rom daviwye laparaki. _ babua rasa iqms? _ vkiTxe me. _ mSvenivradaa, _ miTxra dedam, _ qva da rkinasaviTaa. male oTxmocdameaTe wlisTavs izeimebs. verafriT mivmxvdarvar, rogor moaRwia am asakamde. _ ubralod, _ vupasuxe me, _ am xalisian berikacebs veraferi gastexs, verc Zvelis gaxseneba da verc sindisis qenjna. Sin aris? _ ara, _ mipasuxa dedam, _ eqvsi kviriT gaemgzavra iskiaSi. erTxans vdumdiT. xma jer kidev ar memorCileboda, dedas ki SesaniSnavad eWira Tavi da bolos miTxra: _ axla ki, modi, risTvisac dareke, imaze visaubroT. gavige, isev cud dReSi yofilxar. isic miambes, Turme saqmeSi xeli mogecara. _ ho? _ vupasuxe me, _ Sen albaT geSinia, rom fuls gTxovT. magram tyuilad geSinia. xom vici, mainc arafers momcemT. am saqmes sasamarTlo gadawyvets. fuli ki marTlac mWirdeba, amerikaSi minda wavide. erTi iqauri kaci dampirda, xels mogimarTavo. marTalia, is kaci ebraeli iankia, magram me yvelafers viRoneb imisaTvis, rom rasobrivma winaaRmdegobebma Tavi ar iCinos. axla atireba azradac ar mosvlia. swored im dros, roca yurmils vdebdi, gavigone, kidev raRac Tqva principebze. saqme is iyo, rom dedas, rogorc yovelTvis, axlac `arafris~ suni ar udioda. misi erT-erTi principi RaRadebda: `maRali wris
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qals araviTari suni ar unda udiodes~. SeiZleba esaa imis mizezi, rom mamaCems lamazi sayvareli hyavs. marTalia, suni arc mis sayvarels udis, magram ise gamoiyureba, TiTqos keTilsurnelebas afrqvevdes. 6 yvela baliSi, rac xelSi momyva, zurgs ukan amovide, mtkivani fexi skamze Camovde, telefoni axlos moviCoCe da davfiqrdi, iqneb, jobs, samzareuloSi gavide da macivridan koniaki movitano-meTqi. gansakuTrebiT mzakvrulad JRerda dedaCemis xma, roca miTxra: `saqmeSi xeli mogecara~, Tan arc cdila daemala, rom sixaruliT cas ewia. gulubryvilo viyavi, roca vfiqrobdi, bonSi Cemi xelis mocarvis Taobaze araferi ecodinebaT-meTqi. raki dedam icoda, icoda mamamac, gaagebinebdnen leosac, leo ciupfners Seatyobinebda, ciupfneri ki mTel wres mosdebda da, ra Tqma unda, marisac Caukaklavda. maris Cemze metad ewyineboda es ambavi. sma Tu mivatove, male kvlav mivaRwev im safexurs, rasac Cemi agenti conereri `saSualoze sakmaod maRal dones~ eZaxis da es sruliad sakmarisi iqneboda wumpemde darCenili ocdaori wlis gasaTrevad. erTaderTi, rasac conereri CemSi afasebs, is gaxlavT, rom `farTo profesionaluri bazisi~ maqvs. rac Seexeba xelovnebas, am saqmisa conerers saerTod araferi gaegeba da warmatebis mixedviT msjelobs masze. samagierod, sakmaod kargad icnobs xelobas da mSvenivrad esmis, rom kidev oci weli SemiZlia vipampulo sxvadasxva scenaze ocdaaT markad. magram mari am ambavs sul sxvagvarad uyurebs. mas uTuod daamwuxrebs, rom SemoqmedebiTi marcxi ganvicade da ubadruk mdgomareobaSi aRmovCndi, raSic piradad me SemaZrwunebels verafers vxedav. Soridan mayurebeli adamiani _ amqveynad TiToeulisaTvis yvela Soridan mayurebelia _ sxvis mdgomareobas an ufro muq, an ufro naTel ferebSi aRiqvams, vidre Tavad is, visac es uSualod exeba. sulerTia, bednierebas Seexeba es Tu ubedurebas, siyvaruls, Wmunvas Tu SemoqmedebiT marcxs. raSi menaRvleba, rogor warvudgebi
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ayrolebul darbazebSi kaTolike diasaxlisebs an evangelist medicinis debs _ rogorc klouni Tu rogorc takimasxara. samwuxarod, yvela am religiur kavSirs saocrad mcdari warmodgena aqvs honorarze. aseTi kavSiris xelmZRvaneli qali fiqrobs, rom ormocdaaTi marka gvariani Tanxaa _ Tu kaci aseT Tanxas TveSi ocjer iRebs, Tavisuflad gaitans Tavs. me rom mas mxolod grimze daxarjuli Tanxis angariSi vuCveno da, amave dros, avuxsna, rom repeticiisaTvis cota ufro didi oTaxi mWirdeba sastumroSi, vidre samze gamravlebuli ori metri da oci santimetria, albaT, gaifiqrebs, Tavisi sayvareli sabas dedofaliviT mflangveliao. xolo Tu imasac davZen, rom mivirTmev mxolod Toxlo kvercxs, bulions, dakepil katlets da pamidors, igi pirjvars gadaiwers da gaifiqrebs, es kaci SimSiliT iklavs Tavso _ misi azriT xom kacma yoveldRe unda isadilos rigianad. dabolos, Tu gamovutydebi, rom Cemi mankieri midrekilebaa saRamos gazeTebis kiTxva, sigaretis weva da riC-raCis1 TamaSi, arnaxul TaRliTad CamTvlis. didi xania, rac adamianebTan fulsa da xelovnebaze laparaks moveSvi _ iq, sadac fuli da xelovneba erTmaneTs xvdeba, saqmes xeiriani piri ar uCans. xelovans an akleben fuls, anda imaze mets uxdian, rasac imsaxurebs. erTxel moxetiale inglisur cirkSi erTi klounis gamosvlas daveswari. ostatobaSi ocjer mainc mjobda, rogorc xelovani Cemze aTi TaviT maRla idga, magram yovel gamosvlaSi aT markaze naklebs uxdidnen. inglisel klouns jeims elisi erqva, ormocdaaT wels iyo mitanebuli. jeimsi vaxSamze davpatiJe. mogvarTves loriani omleti, salaTa da vaSlis paSteti. saWmelma awyina: aTi wlis ganmavlobaSi ase msuyed ar uvaxSmia. mas Semdeg, rac jeimsi gavicani, aRarc fulze vlaparakob da aRarc xelovnebaze. piradad me cxovrebis dinebas mivyvebi da arasodes maviwydeba wumpe. mari ki sul sxvagvarad fiqrobs: igi wamdauwum `gamoriC-raCi (Mensh-rgare-Dich-nicht-Spielen (germ.) _ adamiano, nu brazob) _ erTgvari TamaSia dafiT, kamaTliT da patara feradi figurebiT.
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cxadebaze~ laparakobs, misTvis yvelaferi gamocxadebaa, ase gasinjeT, Cemi saqmianobac ki. Turme nu ityviT da, me mxiaruli kacic vyofilvar, Taviseburad RvTismosavic da ase Semdeg. saSinelebaa. mainc rogor aqvT yvelaferi areul-dareuli TavSi am kaTolikeebs. karg Rvinosac ki ver svamen ise, rom tvini ar iRrZon, lamis gaskdnen, sanam `Seicnoben~, ratom da risTvis aris es Rvino kargi. rac Seexeba Secnobas, isini am mxriv marqsistebs ar Camouvardebian. mari aRSfoTda, roca am ramdenime Tvis winaT gitara viyide da vuTxari, sul male simReris teqsts da melodias me TviTon SevTxzav da gitaris TanxlebiT Sevasruleb-meTqi. man miTxra, es Sens profesionalur `dones~ ar ekadrebao, razedac vupasuxe: wumpiani Txrilis doneze ufro dabla mxolod arxia-meTqi. man veraferi gaigo. me ki ar miyvars mxatvruli saxeebis ganmarteba. Cemi an esmiT, an ara. teqstis ganmarteba Cemi saqme ar gaxlavT. vinmes, albaT, Zafebdawyvetili marioneti vegone, magram ase ar iyo: Zafebi magrad meWira xelSi, vicodi, boxumis romeliRac sazogadoebis scenaze mTvrali da muxldaJeJili vegde, darbazidan mesmoda TanagrZnobiT gamsWvaluli CurCulic da Tavi naZiralad mimaCnda. amgvari TanagrZnoba arafriT damimsaxurebia. is merCivna, erTi-orjer magrad daestvinaT. koWlobiTac ki ufro mometebulad vkoWlobdi, vidre fexis aseTma daSavebam icis. mindoda, mari damebrunebina da Cemeburad daviwye brZola imisaTvis, rasac mis wignebSi `xorcieli Jini~ hqvia. 7 erT saRamos maris oTaxSi Sevedi, mindoda is gamekeTebina, rasac qali da kaci erTad akeTeben. maSin me ocdaerTi wlis viyavi, mari ki cxrametisa. nasadilevs ciupfnerTan erTad vnaxe. isini xelixelCakidebulni gamodiodnen axalgazrda kaTolikeTa saxlidan, saxeze orives Rimili dasTamaSebda da aman Semaguliana. ra hqonda saerTo maris ciupfnerTan! ase sulelurad xelixelCakidebulebi rom vixile, avad gavxdi. Cvens qalaqSi ciupfners TiTqmis yvela icnobda, umTavresad
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mamamisis gamo, romelic ufrosi maswavlebeli iyo da nacistebma skolidan panRuris kvriT gamoagdes. omis damTavrebis Semdeg mas direqtorad niSnavdnen imave skolaSi, magram uari ganacxada. viRacas misi ministrad daniSvnac ki undoda, ramac lamis gadaria kaci. maSin uTqvams: _ me maswavlebeli var da minda, bolomde maswavleblad davrCe. ciupfneris mama maRali, wynari kaci iyo. piradad me, rogorc maswavlebeli, cota mosawyeni momeCvena. erTxel germanuli enis maswavlebeli Secvala da xmamaRla wagvikiTxa leqsi mSvenier axalgazrda feriaze. Cemi azri skolis saqmeebze mxedvelobaSi misaRebi araa, saerTod ki Secdoma iyo Cemi ufro didxans datoveba skolaSi, vidre kanoniTaa gaTvaliswinebuli. kanoniT gaTvaliswinebuli droc ki yelSi amomivida. amis gamo arasodes damidanaSaulebia skolis maswavleblebi, yvelaferi Cemi mSoblebis brali iyo. sayovelTaod gavrcelebul sens _ `simwifis atestati mainc xom unda miiRos~ _ adre Tu gvian, rasobriv winaaRmdegobaTa momrigebeli sazogadoebebis centralurma komitetma unda mixedos. es marTlac rasobrivi sakiTxia. skoladamTavrebulebi, skoladaumTavrebelni, maswavleblebi, ufrosi maswavleblebi, diplomianebi, udiplomoni _ gana eseni rasebi ar arian... roca ciupfneris mamam leqsi wagvikiTxa, mcire xans Seicada da Semdeg RimiliT gvkiTxa: _ vis surs, azri gamoTqvas? me imwamsve wamovxti da ganvacxade: _ Cemi azriT, leqsi SesaniSnavia. mTeli klasi axarxarda, ciupfneris mama ki iRimeboda, magram mis RimilSi qedmaRloba ar igrZnoboda. ciupfneris mama sasiamovno, oRond cotaTi gulciv kacad momeCvena. mis vaJs arc ise kargad, magram mamamisze ukeT ki vicnobdi. erTxel sportul moedans Cavuare, sadac ciupfneri sxva axalgazrda kaTolikeebTan erTad fexburTs TamaSobda. roca sayureblad SevCerdi, man damiZaxa: _ CvenTan TamaSi xom ar ginda?
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me davTanxmdi da marcxena naxevarmcvelis adgili davikave im gundSi, romelic ciupfneris winaaRmdeg TamaSobda. roca TamaSi davamTavreT, man miTxra: _ ginda, wamodi CvenTan? _ sad? _ vkiTxe me. _ Cvens Sexvedraze. _ me kaTolike ara var, _ vupasuxe me. ciupfners gaecina, gaicines sxvebmac. _ Cven vimRerebT... Senc xom giyvars simRera, _ miTxra ciupfnerma. _ diax, _ vupasuxe me, _ magram aseTi Sexvedrebi yelSi maqvs amosuli, ori weliwadi tyuilad xom ar davyavi internatSi. ciupfners emwara Cemi sityvebi, magram mainc gaicina da miTxra: _ Tu mogesurveba, kvlav modi fexburTis saTamaSod. mis jgufTan kidev ramdenjerme viTamaSe fexburTi, Semdeg ki nayinis saWmelad gavyevi biWebs. ciupfners aRarasodes mivuwvevivar saRamoze. me isic vicodi, rom mari Tavisi jgufis saRamoebze imave axalgazrda kaTolikeTa saxlSi dadioda. maris kargad vicnobdi, metismetad kargadac ki, radgan mamamisis xSiri stumari viyavi. zogjer, roca mari amxanag gogoebTan erTad burTs TamaSobda, sportul moedanze mec Sevivlidi da maT TamaSs Tvalyurs vadevnebdi, ufro sworad, vuyurebdi maris. isic gaxurebul TamaSSi drodadro xels miqnevda da miRimoda. sapasuxod, mec xels vuqnevdi da vuRimodi. erTmaneTs SesaniSnavad vicnobdiT. yvelaze xSirad swored im dros davdiodi mamamisTan. roca igi hegelisa da marqsis TxzulebaTa axsnas damiwyebda, zogjer maric CvenTan Camojdeboda xolme, magram mamis saxlSi arasodes miRimoda. amitom im dRes, roca nasadilevs is da ciupfneri axalgazrda kaTolikeTa saxlidan xelixelCakidebulni gamovidnen, guli metkina. im wels sulelur mdgomareobaSi aRmovCndi _ swavlas Tavi davanebe, ocdaerTi wlisa gimnaziis meeqvse klasidan gamovedi. paterebma didi gulisxmiereba gamoiCines, gamosaTxovari
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saRamoc ki momiwyves, mogvarTves ludi, buterbrodebi da sigaretebi, xolo imaT, vinc sigarets ar eweoda, SokoladiT umaspinZldebodnen. Tanaklaselebs ramdenime pantomima vuCvene: `kaTolikuri qadageba~, `evangelisturi qadageba~, `muSebi, romelTac konvertebiT xelfasi dauriges~. erTi sityviT, amxanagebs vuCvene aTasgvari fokusi da Carli Caplinsac ki mivbaZe. im saRamos gamosaTxovari sityvac warmovTqvi Temaze: `ra yalbia azri, TiTqos simwifis mowmoba maradiuli netarebis erT-erTi sawindaria~. saRamom mxiarulad Caiara. mxolod Cemianebi iyvnen daboRmilni da gamwarebulni. deda sazizRrad iqceoda, mamas urCevda, maRaroSi ukari Tavio. mama ki sul erTsa da imaves mekiTxeboda, ra ginda gamoxvideo? _ klouni, _ vupasuxe me. _ Sen, albaT, msaxioboba ginda. kargi, iqneb, movaxerxo da romelime Sesaferis saswavlebelSi migabaro, _ miTxra man. _ ara, _ gamovedave me, _ msaxiobi ki ara, klouni minda gavxde... saswavleblebs CemTvis sargebloba ar moutaniaT. _ amixseni mainc, rogori warmodgena gaqvs amaze, _ miTxra man. _ araviTari, _ vupasuxe me, _ araviTari-meTqi da sul male gaveclebi aqaurobas. gavida ori saSineli Tve. imis vaJkacoba ar meyo, rom gudanabadi amekra da iqaurobas gavclodi. yoveli lukmis pirSi Cadebis dros deda ise miyurebda, TiTqos borotmoqmedebas Cavdiodi. arada, wlebis ganmavlobaSi Cvens ojaxSi Semoxetebul sxvadasxva juris muqTaxorebs Zalad atenida pirSi saWmels. magram isini iyvnen `mxatvrebi da poetebi~; mjRabneli Snicleri da gruberi, romelic arc ise cudi kaci Canda. gruberma, am sqelma, Cumma da WuWyianma lirikosma naxevari weliwadi icxovra CvenTan da am xnis ganmavlobaSi erTi striqonic ki ar dauweria. diliT, roca sasauzmod Camodioda, dedaCemi ise Seacqerdeboda saxeSi yovelTvis, TiTqos surda demonTan misi SeWidebis imRamindeli kvali aRmoeCina. aseTi daJinebuli mzera TiTqmis uzneobas udrida. erT mSvenier dRes gruberi ukvalod gaqra da Cven, bavSvebi, gakvirvebulni davrCiT, roca mis
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oTaxSi furclebad daSlili kriminaluri romanebis mTeli dasta aRmovaCineT, xolo sawer magidaze _ ramdenime baraTi, romlebzedac mxolod erTi sityva ewera `arara~. erTze orjer ewera `arara, arara~. aseTi adamianebisaTvis dedaCemi sardafSic ki Cadioda da sagangebod amohqonda loris naWeri. me rom uzarmazari zomis molberti meyida da uzarmazar tiloebze sisuleleebi mejRabna, dedaCemi, albaT, Cems arsebobas Seegueboda da ityoda: `Cveni hansi xelovania, marTalia, jer ZiebebSia, magram Tavis gzas ipovis~. sinamdvileSi ki ra viyavi? _ asakgadacilebuli meeqvseklaseli, viszedac man mxolod is icoda, rom gvarianad exerxeba fokusebis Cveneba. me, ra Tqma unda, araviTari survili ar mqonda lukmapuris saSovnelad meCvenebina maTTvis Cemi `xelovnebis nimuSebi~. amitom naxevar dRes maris mamasTan, moxuc derkumTan vatarebdi. cotas duqanSic vexmarebodi da, Tumca saqme kargad ar miudioda, sigaretebiT mainc mamaragebda. ase vcxovrobdi ori Tve, magram es ori Tve maradisobad meCveneboda, gacilebiT xangrZliv drod, vidre omi. maris iSviaTad vxedavdi, gamosaSvebi gamocdebisaTvis emzadeboda da amxanag gogonebTan mecadineobda. zogjer moxuci derkumi mamCnevda, rom yurs ar vugdebdi, samzareulos kars viyavi miCerebuli. maSin Tavis qneviT meubneboda: _ dRes daigvianebs. da me saxeze almuri medeboda. paraskevi dRe iyo da vicodi, yovel paraskev saRamos derkumi kinoSi dadioda, magram ar vicodi, mari Sin iqneboda Tu megobar qaliSvilTan wavidoda sazuTxad. erTi SexedviT TiTqos araferze vfiqrobdi, magram amave dros vfiqrobdi TiTqmis yvelaferze, imazec, SeZlebda Tu ara mari `imis Semdeg~ gamocdebis Cabarebas. erTi ram winaswar vicodi _ da es Semdeg dadasturda kidec: naxevari boni xom aRSfoTdeboda imis gamo, rom me igi Sevacdine, Tan imasac daumatebdnen: gamocdebi karze iyo momdgario. vfiqrobdi imazec, rom maris Tanaklaseli gogonebi imedgacruebulni darCebodnen. meSinoda imisac, rasac internatSi erTma biWma `fiziologiuri detalebi~ uwoda, mawuxebda potenciis sakiTxic. yvelaze gasaocari is iyo, rom
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sruliad ar vgrZnobdi `xorciel Jins~. vfiqrobdi imazec, rom usindisoba iqneboda, im gasaRebiT Sevsuliyavi maT saxlSi, mamamisma rom momca, magram arCevani ar mqonda _ mainc am gasaRebiT unda mesargebla. maris oTaxis erTaderTi fanjara quCaSi gadioda da is quCa Ramis or saaTamde xalxiT iyo savse. fanjaraSi gadacoceba rom mecada, SeeZloT policiaSi mivebrZanebine. radgan me im dRes unda gamekeTebina marisTan `is saqme~, afTiaqSi Sevedi da Cemi Zmisgan, leosgan nasesxebi fuliT raRac iseTi wamali viyide, internatis biWebis TqmiT, mamakacs rom Zalas matebs. Sevedi Tu ara afTiaqSi, yurebamde gavwiTldi. sabednierod, gamyidveli mamakaci iyo, magram me mainc ise Cumad velaparakebodi, rom momTxova `xmamaRla da garkveviT~ meTqva, rac msurda. momces is preparati, romelic davasaxele, da fuli meafTiaqis cols gadavuxade. qalma Semomxeda da Tavi gadaaqn-gadmoaqnia. man, ra Tqma unda, micno da, roca meore diliT gaigo, rac moxda, albaT iseTi azrebi dautrialda TavSi, sinamdvilesTan saerTo rom araferi hqonda, radgan gaviare Tu ara oriode quCa, is kolofi gavxseni da abebi binZur arxSi Cavyare. Svidi saaTisaTvis, roca kinoSi seansebi iwyeba, gudenaugaseze gavedi. gasaRebi xelSi meWira, magram kari Ria damxvda. roca duqanSi Sevedi, marim derefnidan Tavi gamoyo da daiZaxa: _ aris mand vinme? _ diax, _ gavZaxe, _ me var. kibeze avirbine. mari gaocebuli miyurebda, roca nel-nela Tavisi oTaxisaken ise davaxevine, rom TiTic ar damikarebia. xangrZlivad Cven arasodes gvilaparakia, mxolod vuyurebdiT da vuRimodiT erTmaneTs. amitom arc is vicodi, SenobiT melaparaka masTan Tu TqvenobiT. maris ecva nacrisferi, gacveTili, dedisgan memkvidreobiT miRebuli abanos xalaTi, muqi Tma mwvane zonriT hqonda ukan Sekruli. mogvianebiT, roca zonari gavxseni, mivxvdi, rom mamamisis ankesis nawyveti iyo. maris ise SeeSinda, rom arafris Tqma ar damWirvebia, maSinve mSvenivrad mixvda, rac mindoda. _ momSordi, _ es ki miTxra, magram rogorRac angariS38

miucemlad warmoTqva. vicodi, rom ase unda eTqva. imasac mivxvdiT orive, rom es sityva seriozuladac iyo naTqvami da angariSmiucemladac, magram rogorc ki miTxra `momSordi~ da ara `momSordiT~, yvelaferi maSinve gadawyda. es mokle sityva imden sinazes itevda, megona mTeli sicocxlis manZilze ikmarebda da kinaRam avtirdi. es sityva man ise warmoTqva, rom erT rameSi sabolood davrwmundi: icoda, rom movidodi, yovel SemTxvevaSi, Cemi gamocxadeba misTvis moulodneli ar yofila. _ ara, ara, arsadac ar waval, _ vuTxari me, _ sad unda wavide? man Tavi gaaqnia. _ Sen ginda, oci marka visesxo, kiolnSi gavemgzavro da mere SegirTo? _ ara, _ mipasuxa man, _ nu waxval kiolnSi. maris Sevxede da SiSi gamiqra. bavSvi aRarc me viyavi, maric daqalebuliyo. vxedavdi, rogor eWira xelSi xalaTis kalTa, vuyurebdi mis magidas fanjarasTan da mixaroda, rom saskolo xaraxuris nacvlad zed Targi da sakeravi edo. me qveviT, duqanSi Cavirbine, kari davkete da gasaRebi iq davde, sadac ager ukve ormocdaaTi welia inaxaven _ kanfetebis qilasa da saswavlo rveulebs Soris. roca zeviT avedi, mari sawolze ijda da tiroda. mec sawolze Camovjeqi, mis pirdapir, sigarets movukide da maris gavuwode. im dRes marim Tavis sicocxleSi pirvelad moswia sigareti. eweoda uxerxulad da uecrad orives Cvenda uneburad gagvecina _ ise sasacilod uSvebda kvamls gamobuStuli tuCebidan, TiTqos keklucobso da roca SemTxveviT, kai gaqeqiliviT, boli cxviridanac gamouSva, isev gamecina. bolos laparaki daviwyeT. vlaparakobdiT bevrs. marim miTxra, im qalebze vfiqrob, kiolnSi `am saqmes~ fulis gamo rom akeTeben, Tan darwmunebulni arian, rom `amaSi~ fuli usaTuod unda gadauxadon, Tumca `amaSi~ fulis gadaxda ar SeiZlebao. gamodis, rom qalebi, romelTa qmrebi `imnairebTan~ dadian, valSi arian maT winaSe, me ki ar minda, vinmes winaSe brali mimiZRodeso. mec bevrs vlaparakobdi, varwmunebdi, rom yvelaferi, rac egreT wo39

debuli fizikuri Tu sxvagvari siyvarulis Sesaxeb wamikiTxavs, sisuleled mimaCnia, radgan maTi erTmaneTisagan gamijvna ar SemiZlia-meTqi. marim mkiTxa, lamaz qalad Tu migaCnivar da Tu giyvarvaro. me vupasuxe, erTaderTi qaliSvili xar, visTanac `am saqmis~ gakeTebis survili maqvs da roca amaze vfiqrobdi, internatSic ki mudam Sen myavdi mxedvelobaSi-meTqi. bolos mari wamodga da saabazanoSi gavida, me ki isev mis sawolze vijeqi, sigarets veweodi da im saSinel abebze vfiqrobdi, binZur arxSi rom Cavyare. isev Semipyro SiSma. saabazanosTan mivedi da karze davakakune. mari erTxans yoymanobda, Semdeg neba damrTo. rogorc ki saabazanoSi Sevedi da mari davinaxe, SiSi maSinve gamiqra. sanam TmaSi surnelovan siTxes izelda, saxeze cremli RapaRupiT Camosdioda, xolo roca pudris wasma daiwyo, vkiTxe: _ aq ras akeTeb? _ vlamazdebi, _ mipasuxa man. roca sqlad wasmul pudrSi cremlma patara Rarebi gaikvlia, mkiTxa: _ xom ar ajobebs, waxvide? _ ara, _ vupasuxe me. marim kiolnis wyali daipkura, me ki abazanis kideze Camovjeqi da gavifiqre: `gveyofa ki ori saaTi?~ naxevar saaTze meti laqlaqSi gavatareT. skolaSi im sakiTxis specialistebic iyvnen, Tu raoden Znelia qaliSvilis qalad gadaqceva. me ganuwyvetliv vfiqrobdi gunTerze1, romelmac jer zigfridi2 gagzavna brunhildesTan3 da mxolod amis Semdeg ewvia TviTon, vfiqrobdi nibelungebis saSinel xocva-Jletaze, romelic aseT ambavs mohyva. roca skolaSi gavdiodiT `nibelungebis simReras~, me wamovdeqi da pater vunibalds vuTxari:
gunTeri _ `nibelungebis simReraSi~ burgundiis mefe, krimhildes Zma. zigfridi _ `nibelungebis simReris~ mTavari personaJi, romelic gunTerisaTvis brunhildes imorCilebs. 3 brunhilde _ `nibelungebis simReraSi~ islandiis dedofali. mas Semdeg, rac zigfridi daimorCilebs, burgundiis mefis, gunTeris coli xdeba.
2 1

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_ brunhilde xom marTla iyo zigfridis coli. mas gaeRima da miTxra: _ magram colad krimhilde hyavda SerTuli, ymawvilo. me gavcofdi da ganvacxade, aseTi pasuxi `mRvdlur~ ganmartebad mimaCnia-meTqi. axla pateri vunibaldi gacofda, kaTedraze TiTiT daakakuna, mTeli Tavisi avtoriteti moiSvelia da brZana, `aseTi Seuracxyofa~ aRar momayenoo. me wamovdeqi da maris vuTxari: _ gexvewebi, nu tiri. marim tirili Sewyvita da cremlebis kvali pudriT dafara. sanam mis oTaxSi SevidodiT, derefanSi fanjarasTan SevCerdiT da quCas gadavxedeT: ianvari idga, quCa sveli iyo, yviTeli CiraRdnebis Suqi asfaltze efineboda, xolo bostneulis maRaziis Tavze mwvane reklama CaxCaxebda: `emil Smici~. Smics ki vicnobdi, magram ar vicodi, emili Tu erqva. emili ratomRac misi gvarisaTvis Seuferebel saxelad momeCvena. sanam maris oTaxSi SevidodiT, kari odnav gamovaRe da sinaTle gamovrTe. roca mamamisi Sin dabrunda, Cven jer ar gveZina. TerTmeti sruldeboda. gavigoneT, rogor Sevida sigaretebisaTvis duqanSi, mere kibeze mogvesma misi fexis xma. vfiqrobdiT, uTuod SeamCnevda raRacas, radgan araCveulebrivi ram moxda, magram derkumma veraferi SeamCnia. mxolod erTi wamiT miayura karTan da zeviT avida. gavigoneT, rogor gaixada fexsacmeli da iatakze dayara. Semdeg ki gvesmoda misi xveleba ZilSi. vcdilobdi warmomedgina, rogor Sexvdeboda am ambavs. religiaze derkumma didi xania aiyara guli da kaTolikur eklesias siaxloves aRar ekareboda. CemTan saubarSi Tavs esxmoda `burJuaziuli sazogadoebis cru seqsualur morals~ da brazmoreuli ambobda, mRvdlebma qorwineba TvalTmaqcobad aqcieso. magram mainc ar viyavi darwmunebuli, rom ayalmayals ar atexda imis gamo, rac maris vuyavi. derkumi Zlier miyvarda, mec vuyvardi mas da erTi suli mqonda, SuaRamisas avmdgariyavi, mis oTaxSi Sevsuliyavi da yvelaferi meambna, magram Semdeg gadavifiqre.
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me ukve ocdaerTi wlis mamakaci viyavi, maric srulasakovani, cxrameti wlis qali iyo da aseT viTarebaSi zogjer mamakacuri gulwrfeloba ufro saCoTiroa, vidre dumili. garda amisa, isic gavifiqre, es ambavi mas naklebad exeba, vidre aqamde megona-meTqi. kai sanaxavi ki viqnebodi, naSuadRevs gamovcxadebuliyavi masTan da meTqva: `iciT ra, batono derkum, amaRam Tqvens qaliSvilTan vapireb daZinebas~... imas ki, rac moxda, rogorme gaigebs. cota xnis Semdeg mari adga, sibneleSi makoca da leibs zewrebi gadaaZro. oTaxSi ukuni iyo gabatonebuli, quCidan sinaTle ar Semodioda, radgan fanjaras sqeli farda CamovafareT. `vin aswavla imis gakeTeba, rasac axla akeTebs? ratom gadaaZro leibs zewrebi, ratom gamoaRo fanjara? _ gavifiqre gakvirvebulma. _ me saabazanoSi gaval, Sen ki aq daibane, _ miCurCula man, Semdeg xeli momkida, loginidan wamomayena, xelCakidebulma mimiyvana im kuTxemde, sadac misi pirsabani idga, xelis faTuriT momaZebnina wyliT savse doqi, sasapne, taSti da iRliebqveS zewrebamoCrili oTaxidan gavida. saxeldaxelod davibane da isev loginSi Cavweqi. mikvirda, sad daikarga aqamde mari, ratom ar moaqvs sufTa TeTreuli-meTqi. saSinlad daRlili viyavi da mixaroda, SemeZlo uSiSrad mefiqra dawyevlil gunTerze. mcire xnis Semdeg isev Semipyro SiSma, maris rame xom ar SeemTxva-meTqi. aseT rameebze internatSi Semzarav ambebs hyvebodnen. uzewro leibze wola ar msiamovnebda, garda amisa, Zveli da Cavardnili iyo, Tanac tanze mxolod zeda sacvali mecva da mcioda. isev maris mamaze daviwye fiqri. am kacs yvela komunistad Tvlida, magram roca omis Semdeg burgomistrad unda aerCiaT, komunistebma mxari ar dauWires da saqmec CaifuSa. yovelTvis, roca nacistebisa da komunistebis Sedarebas viwyebdi, igi cofdeboda da meubneboda: _ didi gansxvavebaa, ymawvilo, gana erTi da igivea, kaci sapnis firmis mier gaCaRebul omSi mokvdeba Tu im saqmisaTvis, romelic SeiZleba iwamo? aqamde ar vici, vin iyo igi sinamdvileSi, magram roca er42

Txel kinkelma Cemi TandaswrebiT `genialuri seqtanti~ uwoda, mzad viyavi, kinkelisaTvis saxeSi mimefurTxebina. moxuci derkumi im mcirericxovan adamianebs ekuTvnoda, romelTa mimarTac pativiscemiT viyavi gamsWvaluli. derkumi gamxdari, RvarZliani kaci iyo, imaze bevrad ufro axalgazrda, vidre gamoiyureboda. imden sigarets eweoda, rom sunTqva uWirda. mTeli is xani, rac loginSi viweqi da maris velodi, misi xvela mesmoda zemodan, misi sawoli oTaxidan da Tavi vigindarad mimaCnda, Tumca aseTi ar viyavi. erTxel miTxra: _ ici, ratomaa ganlagebuli mdidrebis saxlSi, ai iseTSi, Seni mSoblebi rom cxovroben, moaxleTa oTaxebi WabukobaSi Sesuli Svilebis gverdiT? agixsni: imitom, rom mdidrebi odiTganve spekulantoben adamianis bunebiT da gulmowyalebiT. vnatrobdi, qveviT Camosuliyo da maris sawolSi Cagorebuls Tavze damdgomoda, magram piradad me zeviT asvlisa da misTvis angariSis Cabarebis survili ar mqonda. gareT inaTa. mcioda da maris oTaxis ubadrukoba guls mimZimebda. derkumebi didi xania gakotrdnen da amis mizezad maris mamis `politikuri fanatizmi~ miaCndaT. adre maT patara stamba, patara gamomcemloba da wignis maRazia hqondaT, bolos ki mxolod sakancelario nivTebis patara maRazia SemorCaT, sadac mowafeebisaTvis nair-nairi tkbileulobac iyideboda. erTxel mamaCemma miTxra: `xom xedav, sadamde SeiZleba miiyvanos adamiani fanatizmma... Tumca omis Semdeg derkums, rogorc politikurad devnil pirovnebas, yvela Sansi hqonda imisa, rom sakuTari gazeTi gamoeca~. saocaria, magram moxuci derkumi arasodes mimaCnda fanatikosad. SesaZloa, mamaCems fanatizmi da qeduxreloba erTmaneTSi ereoda. maris mama locvanebsac ki ar yidda, Tumca SeeZlo cotaTi xeli moeTbo, gansakuTrebiT, kviracxovlobis wina dReebSi. Tu ra xelmokled cxovrobdnen, mxolod maSin davinaxe, roca oTaxSi dRis sinaTle SemoiWra. karadaSi sul sami
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kaba ekida _ muqi mwvane (iseTi grZnoba mqonda, TiTqos mTeli saukune am kabaSi vxedavdi), moyviTalo _ TiTqmis mTlad gacveTili kaba da ucnauri muqi lurji kostiumi, romelsac mxolod saeklesio procesiebis dros icvamda. iqve ekida Zveli, momwvano-boTlisferi palto da mxolod sami wyvili fexsacmeli elaga. iyo wami, roca cdunebam mZlia, mindoda avmdgariyavi, ujrebi gamomeRo da maris sacvlebi dameTvalierebina, magram Tavi Sevikave. me mgoni qalis sacvlebs maSinac ver davaTvalierebdi, roca kanonierad SevirTavdi colad. derkumis xvela karga xania aRar mesmoda. eqvsi saaTi Sesrulda, roca mari saabazanodan gamobrZanda. mixaroda, masTan ise rom gavatare Rame, rogorc aTasjer minatria. maris vakoce da, roca gamiRima, Tavi bednier kacad miviCnie. kiserze misi yinuliviT civi xelebi vigrZeni da CurCuliT vkiTxe: _ ras akeTebdi amden xans? _ ra unda mekeTebina, zewrebi gavrecxe. siamovnebiT gamogicvlidi TeTreuls, magram Cven mxolod oTxi wyvili gvaqvs da roca ori dagebulia. ori irecxeba. Cemken movizide, sabani gadavaxure da, roca misi yinuliviT gaToSili xelebi iRliebSi amovide, marim miTxra, Cemi xelebi aq ise SesaniSnavad da Tbilad mokalaTdnen, rogorc Citebi budeSio. _ arafriT ar SemeZlo aseTi TeTreuli qalbatoni huberisaTvis mimetana, _ miTxra marim, _ sarecxs yovelTvis is gvirecxavs da misgan mTeli qalaqi gaigebda, rac Cven aq movimoqmedeT. verc gadasagdebad gavimete. erTi ki gavifiqre, gadavyri-meTqi, magram mere mainc damenana. _ nuTu TqvenTan cxeli wyali ar modis? _ ara, boileri didi xania gagvifuWda. uecrad atirda da me vkiTxe, ra gatirebs-meTqi. man CurCuliT Tqva: _ RmerTo, Sen xom ici, rom kaTolike var. me vuTxari, am SemTxvevaSi yvela qaliSvili, evangelisti iqneboda igi Tu saerTod urwmuno, mainc itirebda da isic vici, ratom-meTqi. marim gakvirvebiT Semomxeda. me avuxseni:
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_ imitom, rom is, rasac umankoeba hqvia, marTlac arsebobs. mari kvlav tiroda, magram aRaraferi mikiTxavs. mizezi vicodi. igi ramdenime welia xelmZRvanelobda kaTolike qaliSvilebis jgufs, yovelTvis monawileobda saeklesio procesiebSi, cxadia, araerTxel ulaparakia im qaliSvilebTan wminda mariamis qalwulobaze da axla Tavi, albaT, matyuarad da moRalated miaCnda. vicodi, ra cud dReSic iyo, magram meti lodini aRar SemeZlo da maris vuTxari, qaliSvilebs me movelaparakebi-meTqi. _ rao... vis? _ Seni jgufis qaliSvilebs, _ vupasuxe me, _ Sen axla marTla giWirs, magram roca kidev ufro gagiWirdeba, SegiZlia yvelas uTxra, TiTqos me gagaupatiure. maris gaecina da miTxra: _ ra sisulelea, mainc ra unda uTxra qaliSvilebs? _ arafersac ar vetyvi. ubralod warvdgebi maT winaSe, gaviTamaSeb ramdenime nomers da imitacias da isinic maSinve ifiqreben: `ai, Turme vin yofila is Sniri, maris rom `is~ uyo~. ase ajobebs. ratom unda iWoraon kuTxe-kuTxe? mari dafiqrda, mere isev gaicina da miTxra: _ arc ise suleli yofilxar. Semdeg uceb isev atirda da dasZina. _ aqaurebs veRar davenaxvebi. _ ratom? _ vkiTxe me, magram mari mxolod tiroda da Tavs aqnevda. maris xelebi, iRliebSi rom mqonda amodebuli, gaTba. rac ufro metad uTbeboda xelebi, miT ufro mereoda Zili. male ukve misi xelebi me maTbobdnen da roca mkiTxa, Tu giyvarvar, lamaz qalad Tu mTvlio, vupasuxe, es TavisTavad cxadia-meTqi. man miTxra, aseTi `TavisTavad cxadi~ sityvebi sasiamovno mosasmeniao da mec, ZilburanSi wasulma, CaviluRluRe: ra Tqma unda, lamazi xar da miyvarxar-meTqi. roca mari adga, daibana da Caicva, ukve meRviZa. mas Cemi ar Sercxvenia da mec bunebriv ambad miviCnie, misTvis mecqira. axla ufro naTlad davinaxe, ra Raribulad ecva. sanam zon45

rebs iskvnida da Rilebs ikravda, me im lamaz-lamaz nivTebze vfiqrobdi, romelTac vuyiddi, fuli rom mqonoda. xSirad vmdgarvar moduri maRaziebis win da miTvalierebia qveda kabebi, puloverebi, fexsacmelebi, CanTebi, warmodgeniT mivaraudia, rogor mouxdeboda yvelaferi es maris, magram mamamisi iseTi mkacri iyo fulis sakiTxSi, rom verafriT gavbedavdi rame meCuqebina marisaTvis. erTxel derkumma miTxra: _ siRaribe saSinelebaa, magram ufro cudia, roca siRaribe TandaTan giTrevs. arada adamianTa umetesoba swored am dReSia. _ da Tu mdidari xar, es raRaa? _ vkiTxe me da gavwiTldi. man dakvirvebiT Semomxeda, TviTonac gawiTlda da miTxra: _ ici, Cemo kargo, Tu fiqrs ar moeSvi, saqme cudad wagiva. imdeni vaJkacoba rom mqonoda da imis rwmena, rom amqveynad raRacis gamosworeba SeiZleba, ici, ras vizamdi? _ ara, ar vici. _ davaarsebdi iseT sazogadoebas, romelic mdidari ojaxis Svilebze izrunebda, _ miTxra man da isev gawiTlda. _ Cveni regvnebi ki sityva `asocialurs~ mxolod Raribebis mimarT xmaroben. sanam maris Cacmas Tvals vadevnebdi, TavSi aTasnairi fiqri mitrialebda. maxarebda da maRonebda kidec is ambavi, ra bunebrivi iyo misTvis misi sxeuli. Semdeg, roca erTad davexetebodiT sastumrodan sastumroSi, diliT gangeb vdgebodi gvian, raTa meyurebina, rogor ibanda da icvamda mari. xolo Tu saabazano moSorebiT iyo da sawolidan maris ver vuTvalTvalebdi, abazanaSi vwvebodi. im dilas yvelafers merCia mis oTaxSi loginSi vwoliliyavi da mxolod imaze vocnebobdi, Cacma ar daemTavrebina. mari mTeli mondomebiT ibanda kisers, mklavebs, mkerds da gulmodgined ixexavda kbilebs. piradad me SeZlebisdagvarad Tavs varidebdi diliT dabanas, kbilebis xexva axlac mezareba, abazanaSi banaoba mirCevnia, magram roca mari ibanda, me yovelTvis siamovnebas mgvrida misi cqera. ise uyvarda sisufTave, ise bunebrivad akeTebda yvelafers, kbilis pastis tubs saxuravsac
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ise koxtad axraxnida... im diliT Cems Zmaze, leozec vfiqrobdi. igi RvTismosavi, keTilsindisieri, seriozuli axalgazrda iyo da yovelTvis xazgasmiT meubneboda, Seni mwamso. maSin isic gamosaSveb gamocdebs abarebda da ratomRac rcxvenoda, rom simwifis atestats wesisamebr cxrameti wlis asakSi iRebda, me ki ocdaerTi wlisa meeqvse klasSi vijeqi da `nibelungebis simReris~ araswori interpretacia gulze mxeTqavda. maris leoc icnobda, erTmaneTs romeliRac wreSi xvdebodnen, sadac kaTolike da evangelisti axalgazrdebi demokratiasa da religiur Semwynareblobaze kamaTobdnen. maSin me da leo Cvens mSoblebs erTgvari saerTo sacxovreblis gamgebel col-qmradRa vTvlidiT. leos Tavzari daeca, roca gaigo, mamas ager ukve aTi welia sayvareli hyavso. am ambavma mec damca Tavzari, magram ara _ moralurad. CemTvis ioli iyo imis warmodgena, ra Znelia colad gyavdes dedaCemi, romlis yalbi Tviniereba i-sa da e-s Tviniereba iyo. igi iSviaTad warmoTqvamda winadadebas, sadac a, o an u eria. amis tipuri magaliTia Tundac is, rom leos saxeli led Seamokla. misi ori sayvareli winadadeba iyo: `me nivTebs sxvebiviT ver vWvret~ da `me Cems princips mivdev, nivTebSi mizezebs veZeb~. is faqti, rom mamas sayvareli hyavda, CemTvis ufro esTetikuri TvalsazrisiT iyo Tavzardamcemi: mis xasiaTs rogorRac ar uxdeboda amgvari ram. mamaCemi arc vnebaaSlili kaci iyo da arc xalisiani. xolo Tu ukuvagdebT im azrs, rom is qali mamaCems momvlelad an sulis ganmbanvelad sWirdeboda (rasac sruliad ar Seefereba paTetikuri sityva `sayvareli~), maSin uwesoba swored is iyo, rom mamas ar SeSvenis sayvarlis yola. sinamdvileSi misi sayvareli sasiamovno, lamazi momRerali qali iyo, romelsac inteleqti didad ar awuxebda. mamas isic ki ar ucdia, qals damatebiTi kontraqtebis dadebaSi an koncertebis mowyobaSi daxmareboda. amgvar saqmeebSi metismetad wesieri kaci iyo. maTi urTierToba sakmaod awewil-dawewili meCveneboda, leos wuxilis mizezi ki is iyo, rom idealebi Seerya. dedaCemma leos wuxilis axsna sxvanairad ver moaxerxa da Tavisi azri ase gamoxata: `les krizisi iTrevs~. xolo roca saklaso samuSao aradamak47

mayofileblad dawera, dedas undoda fsiqologTan waeyvana. madloba RmerTs, ganzraxvaze xeli avaRebine. samagierod, Zmas movuyevi yvelaferi, rac ki qalisa da mamakacis urTierTobis Sesaxeb vicodi, Tanac ise intensiurad vexmarebodi gakveTilebis momzadebaSi, rom Semdgomi saklaso samuSaoebi ukve damakmayofileblad da `kargzec~ dawera. mxolod amis Semdeg aiRo xeli dedam leos fsiqologTan wayvanaze. marim muqi mwvane kaba Caicva da, Tumca elvaSesakravma saqme gauWira, mainc ar wamovmdgarvar sawolidan, ar davxmarebivar. lamazi sanaxavi iyo misi xelebi, zurgze rom faTurobdnen, TeTri kani, muqi Tma da muqi mwvane kaba. maxarebda isic, rom ar nerviulobda. bolos sawolTan movida, me loginze wamovjeqi da kaba Sevukari. vkiTxe, ase adre ratom dgebi-meTqi. mipasuxa, mamaCems namdvili ZiliT mxolod ganTiadis Jams sZinavs, me ki gazeTebi unda miviRo da duqani gavaRo, radgan moswavleebi zogjer diliT modian rveulebis, fanqrebisa da Saqaryinulis sayidlado. _ garda amisa, _ miTxra man, _ umjobesi iqneba, Cveni saxlidan rvis naxevarze gaxvide. axla yavas movaduReb, Sen ki xuTi wuTis Semdeg frTxilad Camodi samzareuloSi. roca samzareuloSi Cavedi, iseTi grZnoba dameufla, TiTqos coliani viyavi. marim yava damisxa da buterbrodi momimzada, Semdeg ki Tavi gaaqnia da miTxra: _ mudam daubaneli da dauvarcxneli cxaddebi sasauzmod? _ ki, _ vuTxari, _ internatSic ki ver maswavles yoveldRe dilaadrian xel-piris dabana. _ aba, maS ras Svrebi? _ mkiTxa man, _ rogorme xom unda moicilo WuWyi? _ kiolnis wyliT vizel tans, _ vupasuxe me. _ es xom sakmaod Zviri jdeba, _ miTxra man da gawiTlda. _ marTalia, _ vupasuxe me, _ magram biZaCemi, romelic am firmis generaluri warmomadgenelia, erT did flakons migzavnis xolme saCuqrad. is samzareulo, ase kargad rom vicnobdi, dabneulma mivaTvalier-movaTvaliere. es ufro duqnis ukana oTaxi iyo _
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bneli da patara. kuTxeSi momcro qura idga. rogorc yvela diasaxlisi, quraSi maric inaxavda nacarwayril briketebs: saRamoobiT briketebs svel gazeTSi axvevda, diliT ki nakvercxlebs gaqeqavda, SeSasa da axal briketebs daumatebda da cecxls gaaCaRebda. mZags mxrColavi briketebis suni. es suni alionze quCebSi igrZnoba, im diliT ki is patara, CaxuTuli samzareulo aayrola. samzareulo imdenad patara iyo, rom yovelTvis, roca maris quridan sayavis gadmodgma uwevda, unda amdgariyo da skami gverdze gaewia. albaT, zustad aseve iqceodnen misi bebiac da dedac. samzareulo, romelsac ase kargad vicnobdi, im diliT pirvelad momeCvena ulazaTo da, albaT, pirvelad ganvicade is, rasac yoveldRiuroba hqvia: ginda Tu ara, mainc unda akeTo, ris gakeTebac aRar gexaliseba. sulac ar mexaliseboda odesme gavsuliyavi am viwro saxlidan da gareT mekisra raime valdebuleba, pasuxi mego imisaTvis, rac maris vuyavi, pasuxi mego misi jgufis qaliSvilebisa da leos winaSe. Tumca am ambavs sul male Cemi mSoblebic gaigebdnen vinmesgan. merCia am saxlSi davrCeniliyavi da sicocxlis dasasrulamde mevaWra SaqaryinuliTa da saswavlo rveulebiT, saRamoobiT ki marisTan erTad Cavwoliliyavi mis loginSi da dameZina ise gemrielad, rogorc am diliT meZina, roca misi xelebi iRliebSi mqonda amoCrili. erTsa da imave dros saSinelic meCvena da didebulic es yoveldRiuroba _ sayaviT, buterbrodebiT, maris mwvane kabaze afarebuli TeTrzolebiani, lurji, gaxunebuli winsafriT. uecrad momeCvena, rom mxolod qalebisTvisaa yoveldRiuroba iseTive bunebrivi, rogoric maTi sxeuli. vamayobdi, rom mari Cemi coli iyo da, amave dros, Tavi ar mimaCnda imdenad mowiful kacad, amieridan darbaislurad rom unda moiqces. fexze wamovdeqi, magidas Semovuare, mari mklavebSi movimwyvdie da vuTxari: _ gaxsovs, dilauTenia gasarecxad rom adeqi? Tanxmobis niSnad Tavi damiqnia. _ me ki arasodes damaviwydeba, rogor gamiTbe xelebi iRliebSi, _ Tqva man Semdeg, _ axla ki wadi, male rvis naxevari iqneba da duqanSi bavSvebi Semocvivdebian.
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maris quCidan gazeTebis dasta Semovatanine da gaxsnaSi movexmare. swored am dros mopirdapire saxlTan bazridan dabrunebulma Smicma bostneuliT datvirTuli manqana gaaCera. vifiqre, iqneb ver daminaxos-meTqi, da maSinve saxlSi Sevvardi, magram ukve daminaxa. eSmaksac ki ar uWris Tvali ise, rogorc mezobels. duqanSi videqi da davyurebdi dilis axal gazeTebs, ase rom giJdebian metwilad kacebi. piradad me gazeTebi saRamoobiT mainteresebs an maSin, roca abazanaSi vwevar. abazanaSi yvelaze seriozuli dilis gazeTebic iseve araseriozuli meCveneba, rogorc saRamos gazeTebi. ai, ras gvauwyebda msxvili SriftiT awyobili saTauri im diliT: `Strausis Tanamimdevruli politika~. vfiqrob, mowinave werilis an msxvili SriftiT asawyobi saTauris dawera kibernetikuli manqanebisaTvis rom migvendo, namdvilad ajobebda _ gonebis siClungesac aqvs sazRvari, romlis gadalaxva arafriT SeiZleba. uecrad duqnis zari awkrialda da zRurblze gamoCnda rva Tu cxra wlis axaldabanili, Savgvremani, loyawiTeli gogona, romelsac iRliaSi locvani hqonda amoCrili. _ momeciT aTi pfenigis guliani kanfeti, _ miTxra man. me warmodgena ar mqonda, ramdeni kanfeti ergeboda aT pfenigad, magram qilas xufi mainc avxade, parkSi oci kanfeti Cavuyare da Cems sicocxleSi pirvelad Semrcxva Cemi arc ise sufTa TiTebisa, romelTac sqeli mina kidev ufro adidebda. roca parkSi oci kanfeti Cavuyare, gogonam gaocebiT Semomxeda, magram me vuTxari: _ yvelaferi rigzea, SegiZlia waxvide. aTpfenigiani daxlidan aviRe da salaroSi Cavagde. luqanSi dabrunebul maris gaecina, roca aTpfenigiani amayad vaCvene. _ axla ki unda waxvide, _ miTxra man. _ ki magram, ratom, qveyana daiqceva, mamaSenis Zirs CamobrZanebamde rom aq davicado? _ mama cxraze Camova dabla, im dromde Sen isev unda dabrunde, _ miTxra man. _ sanam sxvebisagan gaigebdes, wadi da yvelaferi TviTonve uambe Sens Zmas, leos.
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_ ki batono, _ vuTxari me, _ marTals ambob, magram Sen... _ me kvlav gavwiTldi, _ skolaSi wasvlas ar apireb? _ dRes ar waval da, saerTodac, aRarasodes waval, _ miTxra man. _ male dabrundi. miWirda misi datoveba. marim duqnis karamde mimacila. Ria karSi ise vakoce, rom Smicsa da mis cols daenaxaT. maT im TevzebiviT gadmokarkles Tvalebi, gacecebulebi, anazdad rom aRmoaCenen, rom Turme karga xania wamoegnen ankesze. gzas ise davadeqi, ukan ar momixedavs. mcioda, pijakis sayelo aviwie, sigarets movukide. bazars Cavuyevi, Tumca gza odnav gavigrZele, franciskanerSTraseze Caviare da koblencSTrases kuTxeSi daZrul avtobuss Sevaxti. konduqtorma qalma kari ki gamiRo, magram roca fulis gadasaxdelad mis gverdiT gavCerdi, TiTiT damemuqra da Tavis qneviT maniSna, sigareti Caaqreo. sigareti Cavaqre, namwvi pijakis jibeSi Cavide, win wavedi da Sua avtobusSi gavCerdi. videqi, koblencSTrases gavyurebdi da marize vfiqrobdi. Cemma saxem, etyoba, raRaciT gaagulisa Cem gverdiT mdgomi kaci. man gazeTic ki dauSva dabla, droebiT Seelia `Strausis Tanamimdevrul politikas~, saTvale cxvirze Camoiwia, Tavi gadaaqn-gadmoaqnia da CailuRluRa: `daujerebelia~. mamakacis ukan qali ijda, gverdiT stafiloTi savse tomara moedga da am tomaras kinaRam fexi wamovkari. qals mamakacis SeniSvna WkuaSi daujda, Tavi gadaaqn-gadmoaqnia da tuCebi uxmod aamoZrava. im diliT maris sarkis win misive savarcxliT davivarcxne Tma, rac iSviaTad xdeba. mecva nacrisferi, sufTa, yovlad Cveulebrivi kurtaki, wveri ki arasodes mezrdeboda ise, rom erTi dRis gauparsavi `daujerebel~ moCvenebad veqcie. tanad arc Zalze maRali var, arc Zalze dabali, arc cxviri maqvs imdenad grZeli, rom pasportSi gansakuTrebuli niSnebis grafaSi iyos Cawerili. am grafaSi miweria: ar aqvs. arc WuWyiani viyavi da arc nasvami. da mainc, stafiloiani tomris patroni qali ufro SesamCnevad Relavda, vidre saTvaliani mamakaci, romelmac erTxel kidev gadaaqnia Tavi sasowarkveTiT, Semdeg saTvale moirgo da kvlav Strausis Tanamimdevrobas daubrun51

da. qali ki mousvenrad aqnevda Tavs da Cumad iwyevleboda. undoda gaeziarebina danarCeni mgzavrebisTvis is, rac mis tuCebs ar dascdenia. garegnuli niSnebiT ebraelebs dRemde ver vcnob, Torem SeiZleboda mefiqra, ebraelad xom ar CamTvalesmeTqi. magram, Cemi azriT, isini Cemma garegnobam ki ara, Cemma gamometyvelebam gaaRiziana, roca avtobusidan quCas gavyurebdi da marize vfiqrobdi. am Cumma mtrobam mec gamaRiziana. avtobusidan erTi gaCerebiT adre Camovedi, eberTalee fexiT gaviare da rainisaken gavuxvie. Cvens parkSi wiflis xeebi jer kidev Savi da sveli iyo. axlad moSandakebuli CogburTis moedani ki _ wiTeli. rainze karpaWebi sayvirs agugunebdnen. holSi rom Sevedi, samzareulodan anas Cumi lanZRva momesma. Cemamde mxolod kantikuntad aRwevda: `cudad daamTavrebs... daamTavrebs... cudad~. rogorc ki samzareulos Cavuare, Ria karSi SevZaxe: `ana, dRes ar visauzmeb~. ar SevCerebulvar, saerTo oTaxSi Sevvardi. arasodes momCvenebia ase Camuqebuli muxis kedlebi, xis farTo Taroebi da zed Semodebuli samonadireo nadavli. samusiko salonSi leo Sopenis mazurkas ukravda. im xanebSi moisurva musika eswavla da skolaSi wasvlamde rom cotaTi evarjiSa, dilis eqvs saaTze dgeboda. mazurkis gagonebam mafiqrebina, TiTqos ukve saRamo iyo. Semdeg ki sruliad gadamaviwyda, leo rom ukravda. leo da Sopeni erTmaneTs ar Seeferebodnen, magram ise kargad ukravda, rom amaze ar davfiqrebulvar. Zveli kompozitorebidan yvelaze metad Sopeni da Suberti miyvars. vici, Cveni musikis maswavlebeli marTali iyo, roca mocarts RvTaebrivs eZaxda, beThovens _ gansacvifrebels, gluks _ ganumeorebels, baxs ki didebuls. diax, asea. baxi yovelTvis ocdaaTtomian RvTismetyvelebad meCveneba da maocebs, Sopeni da Suberti ki CemsaviT miwierni arian da amitomac maTi mosmena yvelafers mirCevnia. rainisaken daqanebul parkSi, mtirala tirifebis win, sadac babuaCemis tiri iyo, samizne diskoebi irxeoda. etyoba, meetles daavales maTi dazeTva. babuaCemi zogjer `Zvel biWebs~ uyrida Tavs da am dros Cveni saxlis win patara, mrgval
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moedanze TxuTmetamde uzarmazari avtomanqana mwkrivdeboda, TxuTmeti gaToSili mZRoli ki xeebsa da mesers Soris SequCdeboda, idgnen jguf-jgufad an qvis skamebze skats TamaSobdnen. Tu am `Zveli biWebidan~ romelime TormetianSi moaxvedrebda, maSinve atydeboda Sampanuris sacobebis erTi baTqabuTqi. xandaxan babuaCemi damiZaxebda da `Zvel biWebs~ ramdenime fokuss vuCvenebdi, vbaZavdi adenauers an erhards, rac Zalze meadvileboda, zogjer ki patara scenebs gaviTamaSebdi, magaliTad, `menejeri vagon-restoranSi~. vcdilobdi, Cems scenebSi rac SeiZleba meti RvarZli Cameqsova, magram berikacebi mainc siciliT iWaWebodnen, erTxmad iZaxdnen, SesaniSnavad gaverTeTo. bolos, roca tyviebis carieli yuTiT an langriT TiToeuls Camovuvlidi, metwilad qaRaldis fuls imetebdnen. am cinikos bebruxanebTan SesaniSnavad vpoulobdi saerTo enas, maTTan araviTari saqme ar mqonda. aseve SesaniSnavad gamovnaxavdi saerTo enas Cinel mandarinebTanac. zogierTebi qebasac ki ar iSurebdnen: `kolosaluria~, `didebulia~. zogi erT sityvas aRar sjerdeboda da gaiZaxoda: `am biWs aqvs raRac iseTi~ an kidev: `jer sada xarT~. sanam Sopens yurs vugdebdi, pirvelad momivida azrad, angaJementisaTvis mezruna da cota fuli meSova. SemeZlo babuaCemis xelSewyobiTa da daxmarebiT solo nomrebiT gamovsuliyavi kapitalistebis Sekrebebze an sameTvalyureo sabWos sxdomebis Semdeg xalxi gamemxiarulebina. erTi nomeri `sameTvalyureo sabWo~ daviswavle kidec. Semovida Tu ara leo oTaxSi, Sopeni gaqra. leo metismetad maRalia, qeraTmiani, uCarCoo saTvales atarebs da ise gamoiyureba, TiTqos superintendanti an Svedi iezuiti iyos. misi muqi Sarvlis saguldagulod dauToebulma nakecebma Sopenis musikis ukanaskneli kvali gadarecxa. TeTri puloveri rogorRac ar uxdeboda axalgauToebul Sarvals, arc TeTr puloverze gadmofenili wiTeli perangis sayelo axarebda Tvals. roca vxedav, ra amaod cdilobs zogierTi, ise gamoiyurebodes, TiTqos Cacmas arafrad dagidevs, Rrma melanqolia mipyrobs. iseTi pretenziuli saxelebic maRizianebs, rogorebicaa eTe53

lberTi an gerenTrudi. mxedvelobidan arc is mrCeboda arasodes, rogor hgavda leo henrieTes da, amave dros, arc hgavda. hgavda paWua cxviriT, lurji TvalebiT da Tmis feriT, magram piri sul sxva moyvanilobisa hqonda da yvelaferi is, riTac henrieTe lamazi da xalisiani iyo, leos gulCaTxrobilsa da usicocxlos xdida. sruliad ar etyoboda, rom klasSi pirveli sportsmeni iyo _ ise gamoiyureboda, rogorc fizkulturis gakveTilebidan ganTavisuflebuli mowafe. Tumca misi sawolis zemoT naxevari duJini sportuli sigeli ekida. leo jer swrafad wamovida Cemken, magram uceb ramdenime nabijis daSorebiT SeCerda, xelebi uxerxulad waiRo ganze da mkiTxa: _ hans, ra moxda? man jer TvalebSi Semomxeda, Semdeg mzera cota ufro qveviT Camoacura, TiTqos undoda eniSnebina CemTvis, laqa gaqvso. mxolod axla mivxvdi, rom vtirodi. roca Sopens an Suberts vismen, yovelTvis vtiri. marjvena xelis saCvenebeli TiTiT cremli moviwminde da vuTxari: _ ar vicodi, ase kargad Tu ukravdi Sopens. daukari kidev erTxel mazurka. _ ar mcalia, _ miTxra man, _ skolaSi var wasasvleli, pirvel gakveTilze germanul enaSi gamosaSvebi gamocdisaTvis Temebs dagvirigeben. _ dedaCvenis manqaniT wagiyvan, _ vuTxari me. _ ar miyvars am suleluri manqaniT mgzavroba, _ miTxra man, _ Sen ki ici, rogor mZuls. dedam sportuli manqana `Calis fasad~ iyida erTi megobari qalisagan, leo ki mwvaved ganicdida yvelafers, rasac baqiaobis suni udioda. gacofebiT ki mxolod maSin cofdeboda, roca Cveni mdidari mSoblebis gamo vinme axelebda an efereboda. am dros saxeze almuri asdioda, muSti-krivsac ki ar erideboda. _ damiTme amjerad, dajeqi roialTan da daukari, _ vTxove me, _ nuTu ar gainteresebs, sad viyavi wuxel? leo gawiTlda, iataks daaCerda da miTxra:
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_ ara, ar mainteresebs. _ Rame erT qaliSvilTan gavaTene, axla ukve qalTan, Cems colTan, _ vuTxari me. _ ai, Turme ra momxdara, _ miTxra ise, rom Tavi ar auRia. _ qorwili rodis gadaixadeT? leom ar icoda, sad waeRo Tavisi mouqneli xelebi. uecrad Cemken wamovida da undoda TavCaqindruls gverdiT Caevlo, magram me magrad Cavafrindi saxeloSi. _ is qali mari derkumia, _ vTqvi Cumad. leom mklavi gaiTavisufla, erTi nabijiT ukan daixia da Tqva: _ RmerTo Cemo, SeuZlebelia. _ mere mrisxaned Semomxeda da TavisTvis raRac CaiburdRuna. _ rao, ra Tqvi? _ vkiTxe me. _ isa, rom axla marTlac ar amcdeba manqaniT wasvla. wamiyvan? _ ra Tqma unda, _ vupasuxe me, mklavSi xeli wavavle da saerTo oTaxi mxardamxar gaviareT, ar mindoda saxeSi Semoexeda CemTvis. _ wadi, gasaRebi gamoarTvi, _ vuTxari me, _ deda Sen uars ar getyvis, arc sabuTebi dagaviwydes. marTla, leo, fuli mWirdeba, cota mainc Tu dagrCa? _ salaroSi maqvs, TviTon SegiZlia gamoitano? _ mkiTxa man. _ ar vici, mirCevnia gamomigzavno, _ vuTxari me. man Tavi damiqnia da kibes ahyva. saxlSi darCena rom aRar mindoda, es CemTvis mxolod maSin gaxda cxadi, roca leom kiTxva damisva. samzareuloSi Sexetebuls ana abuzRunebuli damxvda. _ megona, aRar isauzmebdi Sin, _ miTxra man. _ sauzme ar minda, yavas ki davlev, _ vuTxari me. gakrialebul magidas mivujeqi da vuyurebdi anas, romelmac quraze Sedgmul sayaves filtri moxsna da dasawretad fanjris rafaze dado. dilaobiT me da leo mudam moaxleebTan erTad vsauzmobdiT samzareuloSi, radgan mosawyeni iyo, sasadilo
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oTaxSi sazeimod gaSlil did magidasTan rom mogvarTmevdnen sauzmes. aseT dros samzareuloSi yovelTvis mxolod ana iyo. meore mosamsaxure gogo noreTe sawol oTaxSi sauzmes uwyobda dedas da Cacmasa da kosmetikaze bWobdnen. dedas axla, albaT, saxeze placentebisagan damzadebuli ucnauri masa aqvs Warbad wacxebuli da Tavisi SesaniSnavi kbilebiT xorblis marcvlebs RrRnis, xolo noreTe gazeTs ukiTxavs. an SeiZleba jer kidev dilis locviT arian garTulni, romlis teqsti goeTesa da luTeris gamonaTqvamebisganaa Sedgenili da metwilad `qristianTa moraluri aRWurvac~ erTvis Tan. isic SesaZlebelia, rom noreTe dedas sasaqmebeli wamlebis prospeqtebis dastas ukiTxavs. dedas sagangebo saqaRaldec aqvs wamlebis prospeqtebiT gamotenili da Semdegnairad dalagebuli: `kuWnawlavi~, `guli~, `nervebi~, xolo Tu sadme eqimi gamoiWira, maSinve ekiTxeba, rame axali wamali Tu gamoCndao. ase zogavda konsultaciisaTvis gadasaxdel honorars. Tu romelime eqimi sasinj wamlebs gamougzavnida, sixaruliT cas eweoda xolme. anas zurgSeqceulsac vatyobdi, eSinoda im wamis, roca unda Semobrunebuliyo, CemTvis saxeSi Semoexeda da damlaparakeboda. me da anas erTmaneTi gviyvarda, magram mas verafriT ver daeTrguna momabezrebeli survili _ me aRvezarde. ana kai TxuTmeti weli cxovrobda CvenTan, dedas igi biZaSvilma, evangelistma mRvdelma dauTmo. ana potsdameli iyo da, miuxedavad imisa, rom Cven evangelistebi viyaviT, mainc saSinelebad, arabunebrivad eCveneboda, rom rainul dialeqtze vlaparakobdiT. vfiqrob, bavariul dialeqtze molaparake protestanti mas borot sulad moeCveneboda. TxuTmeti wlis ganmavlobaSi ana rainis mxares cotaTi SeeCvia. igi maRali, tanwerweta qalia da amayobs imiT, rom `namdvili qalbatoniviT dadis~. mamamisi xazinadrad muSaobda sadRac. me mxolod is vicodi, rom mis samuSao adgils `mecxre qveiTi polki~ erqva. azri ar hqonda anasaTvis gemtkicebina, rom Cveni saxli mecxre qveiTi polki ar iyo. rac Seexeba axalgazrdobis aRzrdis sakiTxs, verafriT moaSlevinebdi Semdeg sentencias: `mecxre qveiT polkSi amas rogor dauSvebdnen~. ver iqna da ver mivxvdi, ra iyo
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es mecxre polki, magram erTi ram danamdvilebiT vicodi: am saidumloebiT mocul aRmzrdelobiT dawesebulebaSi, albaT, tualetis mwmendavadac ki ar mimiRebdnen. ana jadosnur mecxre polks moiSveliebda xolme maSinac, roca vibandi xelpirs. Cemi `saSineli Cveuleba~ ki _ loginSi didxans nebivroba _ iseT zizRs hgvrida, TiTqos keTri mWirda. bolos, rogorc iqna, ana Semobrunda. roca sayaviT xelSi magidasTan movida, Tvalebi ise hqonda daxrili Zirs, TiTqos saxelgatexil episkoposs emsaxurebao. igi iseve mecodeboda, rogorc maris jgufis qaliSvilebi. anas monazvnurma instinqtma ar uRalata, cxadad mixvda, saidanac movdiodi, dedaCemi ki, albaT, sami weliwadi rom vyofiliyavi saidumlod daqorwinebuli, mainc verafers mixvdeboda. anas sayave gamovarTvi, yava davisxi, Semdeg mklavze magrad movuWire xeli da vaiZule, CemTvis Semoexeda. man Tavisi gamoxunebuli lurji TvalebiT Semomxeda, quTuToebi uTrToda da davinaxe, rom marTla tiroda. _ dalaxvros eSmakma, ana, _ wamoviZaxe me, _ Semomxede TvalebSi. vfiqrob, im Sens mecxre polkSi adamianebi vaJkacurad uyureben erTmaneTs TvalebSi. _ me vaJkaci ara var, _ azluqunda ana. xeli gavuSvi, saxe qurisken miabruna da raRac Caiburtyuna codvasa da sircxvilze, sodomsa da gomorze. _ RmerTo Cemo, ana, dafiqrdi, ras akeTebdnen isini sinamdvileSi sodomsa da gomorSi, _ vuTxari me. anam Cemi xeli mxridan Camoicila. samzareulodan ise gavedi, misTvis arc miTqvams, saxlidan wasvla rom mqonda gadawyvetili. ana iyo erTaderTi arseba, visac zogjer henrieTeze velaparakebodi. leo ukve garaJTan idga da majis saaTs SiSiT dahyurebda. _ deda mixvda, wuxel rom Sin ar viyavi? _ vkiTxe me. _ ara, _ miTxra man, gasaRebi gadmomca da garaJis kari damikava. me manqanaSi Cavjeqi. garaJidan gavedi da leo Cavisvi. igi yuradRebiT dascqeroda sakuTar frCxilebs. _ salaros wignaki Tan wamoviRe, fuls Sesvenebis dros gamovitan. sad gamogigzavno?
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_ gamogzavne moxuci derkumis saxelze, _ vupasuxe me. _ droa daiZra, _ miTxra man. Cvens baRSi manqana swrafad gavaqrole da, roca WiSkars gavcdi, Cemda uneburad Sevayovne manqana im gaCerebasTan, sadac henrieTe tramvaiSi Cajda da sazenito qvedanayofSi gaeSura. tramvaiSi henrieTes toli qaliSvilebi sxdebodnen. tramvais rom gavuswari, henrieTes xnis qaliSvili kidev bevri davinaxe. isini henrieTesaviT icinodnen, Tavze lurji qudebi exuraT da paltoebze bewvis sayeloebi hqondaT Semovlebuli. omi rom xelaxla daiwyos, maT, albaT, mSoblebi iseve gagzavnidnen saomrad, rogorc Cemma mSoblebma gagzavnes henrieTe. xelSi jibis fulsa da oriode buterbrods SeaCeCebdnen, mxarze xels dahkravdnen da etyodnen: `aba, Sen ici~. siamovnebiT davuqnevdi am qaliSvilebs xels, magram gadavifiqre, ra vici, axla yvelaferi ukuRmarTad esmiT. anda qaliSvils xels rogor dauqnev, roca aseT sulelur manqanaSi zixar. erTxel sasaxlis baRSi erT biWs naxevari fila Sokoladi miveci da WuWyiani Sublidan qera Tma gadavuyare. igi tiroda, cremlebs xeliT iwmendda da saxe mTlad gaeTxupna. mindoda damemSvidebina, magram amis gamo orma qalma Savi dRe mayara, kinaRam policiels dauZaxes. mTeli am ayalmayalis Semdeg ise vgrZnobdi Tavs, TiTqos marTlac gaTaxsirebuli kaci vyofiliyavi. erTi qali wamdauwum meZaxda: `binZuro salaxanav, binZuro salaxanav~. saSineli ram gadamxda Tavs. am aliaqoTis amtexi dedakacebi iseTive utifrebi momeCvennen, rogoric Cems warmodgenaSi marTla gaTaxsirebuli kacia. koblencis quCaze didi siswrafiT gavqandi, Tan Tvalebs aqeT-iqiT vacecebdi, mindoda romelime ministris manqana SemomfeTeboda da gamekawra. dedaCemis manqanas Tvlebis morgvebi win aqvs gaSverili da am morgvebiT sxva manqanis gakawvra marTlac SemeZlo, magram ase adre da isic manqaniT ministri quCaSi ar gamodis. _ marTla apireb jarSi wasvlas? _ vkiTxe leos. _ es sakiTxi Cvens wreSi ganvixileT da im daskvnamde mivediT, rom jarSi wasvla demokratiis gaRrmavebas uwyobs xels.
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_ didebulia, _ vuTxari me, _ wadi da Cayuryumelavdi im idiotobaSi. zogjer vwuxvar, samxedrovaldebuli rom ar var. leom gakvirvebiT Semomxeda, magram roca mec movindome misTvis Semexeda, Tavi isev miatriala. _ ratom? _ mkiTxa man. _ o, _ vTqvi me, _ didi siamovnebiT Sevxvdebodi kidev erTxel im maiors, romelic omis dros Cvens saxlSi Caasaxles da frau vinekenis daxvretas apirebda. axla igi, albaT, polkovniki an generali iqneba. manqana beThovenis gimnaziis win gavaCere, vifiqre, leos gadmovsvam-meTqi, magram man Tavi gaaqnia da miTxra: _ manqana qveviT, konviqtis marjvniv gaaCere. me gza ganvagrZe, bolos manqana gavaCere da leos xeli CamovarTvi. magram leo gawamebuli kaciviT miRimoda da xeli ukan ar mihqonda. fiqriT me ukve Sors viyavi, ar mesmoda, ra undoda da amasTanave isic maRizianebda, rom leo waramara SeSfoTebuli dahyurebda saaTs. rvas xuTi wuTi aklda. dro sakmarisi hqonda. _ Sen ra, marTla apireb jarSi wasvlas? _ vkiTxe me kvlav. _ ratomac ara, _ mipasuxa gulmosulma, _ momeci manqanis gasaRebi! gasaRebi miveci, Tavi davuqnie da gavSordi. mTeli gza henrieTeze vfiqrobdi da leos gajariskaceba sigiJed mimaCnda. Semdeg sasaxlis baRi gadavWeri, universitetis TaRis qveS gaviare da bazrisaken gavwie. mcioda, guli marisaken mimiwevda. roca duqanSi Sevedi, iqauroba bavSvebiT iyo savse. bavSvebi Taroebidan kanfetebs, fanqrebs, saSlelebs iRebdnen da moxuc derkums daxlze fuls uyridnen. ukana oTaxSi didi vai-vaglaxiT gavZveri. derkums CemTvis ar Semouxedavs. qurasTan misuli xelebs sayaveze viTbobdi da vfiqrobdi, mari sadacaa gamoCndeba-meTqi. sigareti gamomelia. maris ki vTxovdi, moetana, magram ar vicodi, ufasod gamomerTmia Tu fuli gadamexada. sayavidan yava davisxi da mxolod axla SevamCnie, rom magidaze sami finjani idga. roca duqanSi siCume Camovarda, Cemi finjani isev magidaze davdgi da vinatre, neta mari aq
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iyos-meTqi. quris gverdiT WurWlis sarecx bakanSi xel-piri davibane, xolo Tma sasapneSi Cadebuli frCxilebis sawmendi jagrisiT davivarcxne, sayelo gaviswore, yelsaxvevi magrad CamovqaCe da kidev erTxel davxede Cems frCxilebs. frCxilebi sufTa mqonda da uecrad mivxvdi, bevri iseTi ramis gakeTeba momiwevda, rasac adre ar vakeTebdi. roca oTaxSi maris mama Semovida, axaldamjdari viyavi da imwamsve fexze wamovxti. isic CemsaviT darcxvenili iyo da uxerxulobas ver malavda, magram gabrazebuli ar momCvenebia. ubralod, metismetad seriozuli gamometyveleba hqonda. roca xeli sayavis asaRebad wamoiRo, SesamCnevad SevkrTi. man Tavi gaaqnia, yava daisxa da sayave me momawoda. madloba gadavuxade. derkums arc amjerad Semouxedavs CemTvis. Rame maris sawolSi rom viweqi da momxdarze vfiqrobdi, guli sagules mqonda. Zalian mindoda sigaretis moweva, magram ver vbedavdi amomeRo misi kolofidan, romelic iqve, magidaze ido. sxva dros, cxadia, kolofidan sigaretis amoReba ar gamiWirdeboda. derkumi adga, Tavdaxrili magidas daeyrdno. Tvali vkide mis melot Tavsa da aqa-iq SemorCenil gaCeCil WaRara Tmas. ratomRac Zalian xnieri meCvena. _ batono derkum, _ daviwye wynarad, _ Tqven ufleba gaqvT... magram man magidas dahkra xeli, rogorc iqna, saTvalis zemodan Semomxeda saxeSi da miTxra: _ eSmakma wagiRos, nuTu es ase aucilebeli iyo! Tanac mTeli mezobloba raRad CarieT amaSi? gamixarda, guli rom ar aiyara Cemze da zneobaze ar daiwyo laparaki. _ nuTu marTla ase aucilebeli iyo. xom icodi, yvelafers viklebdi imisaTvis, rom is wyeuli gamocdebi Caebarebina, axla ki aRaraferi... _ muSti ise mokuma da gaSala, TiTqos Citi gauSvao, _ yvelaferi wyalSi Cayara. _ mari sad aris? _ vkiTxe me. _ wavida, kiolnSi gaemgzavra, _ miTxra man. _ sad aris? _ viyvire me, _ sad?
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_ aba, wynarad, _ miTxra man, _ Tavis droze gaigeb yvelafers. vici, rom siyvarulze, qorwinebaze da aseT rameebze damiwyeb axla laparaks, magram Tavs nu Seiwuxeb. mibrZandi, mibrZandi. vnaxoT erTi, ra gamova Sengan. aba, mibrZandi! meSinoda mis win gamevlo. _ misamarTi? _ vkiTxe me. _ ageraa, _ miTxra man da magidaze datovebuli baraTi Cemken gamoacura. baraTi jibeSi Cavide. _ raRa ginda kidev, ras dgaxar, ras elodebi? _ miyvira man. _ fuli mWirdeba, _ vuTxari me da gamixarda, radgan mas uecrad gaecina. es iyo ucnauri sicili, boroti, mkacri. zustad ase gaecina erTxelac, roca mamaCemze vlaparakobdiT. _ fuli? etyoba, xumrob, _ miTxra man, _ Tumca wamodi, wamodi! man saxeloSi xeli Camavlo da duqnisaken wamaTria. Semdeg daxls ukan gavida, salaros ujra swrafad gamoaRo da xurda fuli orive peSviT gadmomiyara. aTpfenigianebi, xuTpfenigianebi da pfenigianebi gazeTebsa da rveulebze mimoifanta. jer vyoymanobdi, mere nela Sevudeqi xurda fulis akrefas. Tavidan mindoda xelis erTi mosmiT amekrifa, magram TiTo-TiTod movkrife, markebad davamrgvale da jibeSi Caviyare. derkumi Tvals ar maSorebda, Tavi damiqnia. Semdeg ki safule amoiRo da win xuTmarkiani damido. oriveni gavwiTldiT. _ mapatie, mapatie, o, RmerTo, mapatie, _ miTxra man wynarad. derkums egona, Seuracxyofa momayena, magram me kargad mesmoda misi. _ erTi kolofi sigaretic maCuqeT, _ vTxove me. derkumi ukanmiuxedavad miswvda Taros da erTis nacvlad ori kolofi gamomiwoda. me daxlisaken gadavixare da loyaze vakoce. derkumi erTaderTi kacia, visTvisac mikocnia. 8 imis warmodgena, rom ciupfners SeeZlo da uflebac hqonda ecqira, rogor icvams mari da rogor axraxnis kbilis pas61

tis tubs saxuravs, guls miTuTqavda. fexi mtkioda da ukve eWvi mepareboda, SevZlebdi ki amieridan ocdaaTi-ormocdaaTi markis doneze pampulaobas? mSxamavda imis gafiqrebac, rom ciupfneri gulgrilad Sescqeroda maris im dros, roca is kbilis pastis tubs saxuravs axraxnida. Cemi mcire gamocdilebiT vicodi, rom kaTolikeebma wvrilmanebis fasi ar ician. ciupfneris telefonis nomeri qaRaldze mewera, magram am nomris asakrefad jer kidev ar viyavi saTanadod Semzadebuli. adamianebi ras ar sCadian msoflmxedvelobis zegavleniT. iqneb, mari misTxovda kidec ciupfners. telefonSi rom maris xma gamegona da eTqva: ciupfneri gismenTo, namdvilad ver avitandi. mindoda, leosTvis damereka. telefonebis wignSi sasuliero seminariebis nomrebi veZebe, magram ver aRmovaCine. amave dros, vicodi, rom qalaqSi ori sasuliero seminaria iyo _ leoninumi da albertinumi. bolos meyo Zala, yurmili aviRe da cnobaTa biuros davureke. warmoidgineT, Tavisufali aRmoCnda. qaliSvils, romelmac pasuxi gamca, kiloc ki rainuli hqonda. xandaxan ise menatreboda rainuli kilos gagoneba, rom nebismieri sastumrodan bonis satelefono sadgurSi mxolod imisaTvis vrekavdi, rom momesmina aramxedruli, rnakluli ena. samxedro disciplina xom ZiriTadad r bgerazea dafuZnebuli. xuTjer mainc miTxres, gTxovT daicadoTo. bolos romeliRac qaliSvilma xma gamca da me vkiTxe im `dawesebulebaTa nomrebi, sadac kaTolike mRvdlebs amzadeben~. Tan avuxseni, sasuliero seminariebs veZeb da verafriT ver mipovia-meTqi. qaliSvilma gaicina, amixsna, am `dawesebulebebs~ konviqtebi hqviao, brWyalebSi Casmuli sityva sasiamovnod, xazgasmiT miTxra da orive saswavleblis telefonis nomrebi momca. qaliSvilis xmam odnav manugeSa. es xma gapranWulad, minazebulad ki ar JRerda, aramed sruliad bunebrivad da metismetad rainulad. amis Semdeg isic ki movaxerxe, rom telegrafs davukavSirdi da karl emonds depeSa gavugzavne. ver gamigia pirdapir, ratom cdilobs adamiani, visac inteligentad moaqvs Tavi da movaleoba sZuls, bonic SeiZulos.
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bons yovelTvis gaaCnda Tavisi momxibvleloba, moTenTili momxibvleloba, msgavsad zogierTi moTenTili qalisa, romelic, vfiqrob, swored amis gamoa moTenTili. TavisTavad cxadia, bons ar uxdeba gazviadeba, es qalaqi ki misda uneburad gaazviades. qalaqi, romelsac ar uxdeba gazviadeba, SeuZlebelia aRwero: es ukve TavisTavad iSviaTi Tvisebaa. bavSvebmac ki ician, bonis hava pensionerebs rom rgebs, radgan haeris wnevasa da sisxlis wnevas Soris raRac kavSiri arsebobs. is, rac yvelaze metad ar Seefereba bons, TavdacviTi sificxea. Cvens saxlSi bevrjer mqonia SesaZlebloba, mesaubra ministrebTan, deputatebTan, generlebTan (dedaCems Zalian uyvars wveulebebi) da yvela isini, gaRizianebulni, zogjer ki TiTqmis atirebulni, raRacisagan icavdnen Tavs. amave dros, bonis xsenebaze maT RimilSi nawvalebi ironia gamokrToda. CemTvis gaugebari iyo maTi manWva-grexa. Tu qali, romlis momxibvleloba mis moTenTilobaSia, uecrad veluriviT daiwyebs kankanis cekvas, SeiZleba kacma ifiqros, dopingi SeuSxapuneso, magram mTel qalaqs dopings xom ver SeuSxapuneben, amas ver moaxerxeben. SeiZleba moxucma, keTilma deidam gaswavlos, rogor moqsovo puloverebi CxirebiT an xelsaxocebi yaisnaRiT, gaswavlos, rogor miitano Rvino sufraze, magram CemTvis sruliad moulodneli iqneboda, orsaaTiani, maxvilgonivruli, amomwuravi moxseneba rom waekiTxa homoseqsualizmze anda uecrad kaxpebis Jargonze daewyo laparaki, rac bonSi, yvelas gulis dasawyvetad, naklebadaa gavrcelebuli. yalbi imedebi, yalbi sircxvili, yalbi spekulacia arabunebrivis Sesaxeb. ar gamikvirdeba, kaxpebis naklebobaze Civili romis papis legatebmac rom daiwyon. dedaCemis erT-erT wveulebaze erTi partiuli moRvawe gavicani, romelic prostituciasTan brZolis komitetis wevri iyo da, amave dros, CurCuliT mewuwuneboda bonSi kaxpebis naklebobaze. erT dros boni arc ise cudi qalaqi iyo Tavisi viwro quCebiT, wignis maRaziebiT, studentTa korporaciebiT da patara safunTuSeebiT, romelTa ukana oTaxebSi yavis dalevac SeiZleboda.
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sanam leos davurekavdi, aivanze koWlobiT gavCanCaldi da mSobliur qalaqs gadavxede. boni marTlac lamazia: sakaTedro taZari, kurfiurstis yofili sasaxlis saxuravebi, beThovenis Zegli, patara bazari da sasaxlis baRi. bonis bedia isic, rom misi bedi aravis swams. aivanze Rrmad SevisunTqe bonis haeri, romelmac moulodnelad gamomacocxla. Tu vinmes haeris gamocvla surs, bons SeuZlia ramdenime saaTiT saswaulebi moaxdinos. aivnidan oTaxSi Sevbrundi da uyoymanod avkrife im saswavleblis nomeri, sadac leo swavlobda. uecrad SiSma Semipyro. leo mas Semdeg ar minaxavs, rac kaTolike gaxda. sarwmunoeba rom gamoicvala, Cveulebisamebr, bavSvuri gulmodginebiT mauwya. `sayvarelo Zmao~, _ mwerda igi, _ `am baraTiT gatyobineb me Sen, rom bevri fiqris Semdeg CemSi momwifda gadawyvetileba, kaTolikur eklesias Sevafaro Tavi da samRvdlod movemzado. imedi maqvs, male mogvecema SesaZlebloba, piradad vimsjeloT Cems cxovrebaSi arsebiTi cvlilebebis Sesaxeb. Seni moyvaruli Zma leo~. leo gamwarebiT cdilobda, Tavi aeridebina werilis `me~Ti dawyebisTvis da nacvlad winadadebisa `me Sen gatyobineb~ Zvelmoduri maneriT mwerda `gatyobineb me Sen~. amaSi mTeli sigrZe-siganiT Canda leo. sad iyo is eleganturoba, roialze dakvris dros rom mJRavndeboda. leos Cveva, yvelafers saqmiani xasiaTi misces, Cems melanqolias amZafrebs. Tu ase ganagrZobs, odesme dafasebuli, TmaSevercxlili prelati iqneba. werilis wera mamas da leos Tanabrad uWirT, yvelaferze ise weren, TiTqos mura naxSirze laparakobdnen. sanam leos saswavlebelSi vinme keTilinebebda da telefonTan movidoda, didi dro gavida. is iyo vemzadebodi im magar-magari sityvebiT Sememko eklesiis uTauroba, Cems ganwyobilebas rom Seefereboda, sityva `nexvic~ ki damcda, rom swored maSin viRacam yurmili aiRo da saocrad CaxleCili xmiT miTxra `gismenT~. guli damwyda, megona, monazvnis naz xmas gavigonebdi da wyalwyala yavisa da gamxmari namcxvris
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suni mecemoda. nacvlad amisa, aqoSinebuli kaci SemrCa xelSi da Cibuxis Tambaqosa da kombostos iseTi gulis amrevi suni Semomafrqvia, xvelebac ki damawyebina. _ mapatieT, _ vTqvi bolos, _ SeiZleba, damalaparakoT Teologiis fakultetis studenti leo Sniri? _ vin melaparakeba? _ Sniri, _ vupasuxe me. etyoba, amdenis mixvedris Tavi ar hqonda, didxans dumda. me isev xvela daviwye da, roca azri movikribe, vuTxari: _ ici ra, aso-aso dagimarcvlavT: Segirdi, nisli, ida, rihardi, ida. _ eg ras niSnavs? _ mkiTxa man bolos da momeCvena, rom mis xmaSi iseTive sasowarkveTa igrZnoboda, rogoric Tavad me dameufla. iqneb, telefonis yurmili romelime beberma, pirSi CibuxgaCrilma profesorma aiRo. mec swrafad Sevakowiwe ramdenime laTinuri sityva da vuTxari: _ Sum frater Leonis1. ar momewona Cemi saqcieli. gulSi gavivle, vin icis, xandaxan ramden adamians surda am saswavleblis aRsazrdelebTan dalaparakeba da Tavis dReSi laTinuri sityvac ki ar uswavliaT. Sevcbundi, roca Cemma Tanamosaubrem CaixiTxiTa da miTxra: _ Frater tuus est in refectorio2, saWmels miirTmeven, _ miTxra man ufro xmadabla, _ da Wamis dros maTi Sewuxeba arafriT ar SeiZleba. _ Zlier saswrafo saqme maqvs, _ vuTxari me. _ mokvda vinme? _ mkiTxa man. _ ara, _ vupasuxe me, _ cotaRa aklia. _ maS, mZime ubeduri SemTxvevaa? _ ara, _ vuTxari me, _ Sinagani ubeduri SemTxvevaa. _ ah, _ Tqva man da xma cotaTi Seurbilda, _ Sinagani sisxlCaqceva? _ ara, _ vupasuxe me, _ sulieri tkivilia, gamokveTili sulieri tkivili.
1 2

Sum frater Leonis (laT.) _ leonis Zma var. Frater tuus est in refectorio (laT.) _ Seni Zma sasadiloSia.

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etyoba, suli misTvis ucxo sityva iyo. Cven Soris gamyinavi dumili Camowva. _ RmerTo Cemo, nuTu ar gesmiT, adamiani xom xorcisa da sulisagan Sedgeba. misi burtyuni cxadyofda, rom Cemi gancxadeba saeWvod miaCnda da bolos, Cibuxis or nafazs Soris, amoiluRluRa: _ avgustine, bonaventura, kuzanusi _ Tqven mcdar gzas dasdgomixarT. _ suli, _ gavimeore jiutad, _ gTxovT gadasceT baton Snirs, rom misi Zmis suli safrTxeSia da, rogorc ki Wamas morCeba, maSinve damirekos. _ suli, Zma, safrTxe, _ gaimeora man civad. albaT, aseve ityoda sityvebs: nagavi, naxerxi, naRebi. am ambavma cotaTi gamarTo. im dawesebulebaSi, sadac studentebs sulis mkurnalebad zrdidnen, erTxel mainc xom unda gaegona am kacs sityva `suli~. _ saqme Zalian, Zalian saSuria, _ vuTxari me. yurmilSi gaisma mxolod `hm, hm~. etyoba, misTvis sruliad gaugebari iyo, rom sulTan dakavSirebuli saqme SeiZleboda saSuri yofiliyo. _ gadavcem, _ miTxra man. _ Segirdze, mgoni, raRaca TqviT? _ ara, araferi, _ vupasuxe me, _ RmerTmani, araferi, Cems ambavs SegirdebTan saerTo araferi aqvs. es sityva mxolod imitom gamoviyene, rom Cemi gvari aso-aso meTqva. _ Tqven, albaT, ggoniaT, Segirdebs skolaSi axlac aswavlian sityvebis aso-aso damarcvlas. nuTu marTla ase ggoniaT? igi ise gamococxlda, rom vifiqre, namdvilad mis sayvarel Temas Sevexe-meTqi. _ dRevandeli meTodebi metismetad rbilia, _ yviroda igi, _ metismetad rbili. _ geTanxmebiT, _ vupasuxe me, _ skolebSi ufro xSirad unda iyenebdnen cemis meTods. _ marTalsa brZanebT, _ wamoiyvira man mgznebared. _ diax, _ vuTxari me, _ gansakuTrebiT kargi iqneboda,
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maswavleblebs rom scemdnen ufro xSirad. xom gadascemT Cems Zmas imas, rac gTxoveT? _ gadaudebeli, sulTan dakavSirebuli saqme. skolis sakiTxi. ukve Caviwere, _ miTxra man. _ yuri migdeT, ymawvilo, rogorc bevrad ufros kacs, xom momcemT imis uflebas, erTi keTili rCeva mogceT? _ brZaneT, batono! _ moeSviT avgustins. damajereblad Camoyalibebuli subieqtivizmi jer kidev ar aris Teologia da axalgazrdebis sulieri cxovrebisaTvis mxolod ziani moaqvs. es aris oriode dialeqtikuri elementiT Sevsebuli Jurnalistika. imedi maqvs, cudad ar CamomarTmevT am rCevas. _ rogor gekadrebaT, _ vupasuxe me, _ axlave avdgebi da Cems avgustins cecxls mivcem. _ sworad moiqceviT, _ miTxra aRfrTovanebulma, _ cecxls mieciT, RmerTi iyos Tqveni Semwe. madlobis Tqmas vapirebdi, magram uadgilod momeCvena, amitom yurmili uxmod davde da ofli moviwminde. sunis mimarT Zalian mgrZnobiare var da kombostos mZafrma sunma Cemi vegetatiuri nervuli sistema ukiduresad daZaba. uneburad saeklesio uwyebebis meTodebzec daviwye fiqri. ra Tqma unda, kargia, roca aseT moxucs agrZnobineb, jer kidev saWiro kaci xaro, magram erTi ram ar mesmoda: raRa maincdamainc aseT gamoyruebul da axirebul berikacs miandes telefonis momsaxureba. kombostos suns internatSi swavlis droidan vcnobdi. internatSi erTma paterma gviTxra, kombosto vnebas Trgunavso, da imis warmodgena, rom viRacas SeeZlo sagangebod daeTrguna Cemi Tu sxvisi vneba, guls mirevda. rogorc etyoba, seminariebSi dRedaRam `xorcieli Jinis~ daTrgunvaze zrunaven. sadRac samzareuloSi, albaT, zis monazoni, romelic menius adgens da Semdeg amis Taobaze saswavleblis direqtors eTaTbireba. maSin isini erTmaneTis pirispir sxedan, vnebaze saubars gaurbian, magram qaRaldze Camowerili yoveli kerZi afiqrebinebT: es vnebas Trgunavs, es ki aRagznebs. aseTi ambavi iseTive uzneobad meCveneba, rogorc dawyevlili mravalsaaTia67

ni fexburTis TamaSi internatSi. Cven yvelam vicodiT, TamaSisagan ise unda mivsavaTebuliyaviT, rom gogoebze ar gvefiqra. aman fexburTi SemaZula. rogorc ki warmovidgine, rom Cems Zma leos kombostos imitom aWmevdnen, rom misi vnebaTaRelva daecxroT, udidesi survili gamiCnda, mivsuliyavi im dawesebulebaSi da kombostos mTeli maragisaTvis marilmJava gadamesxa. axalgazrdebs ukombostodac bevri ramis atana uwevT. usaSvelod Znelia, albaT, yoveldRe iseTi gaugebari ramis qadageba, rogoricaa `mkvdreTiT aRdgoma~ an `maradiuli arseboba~. es raRaa: saguldagulod daamuSao uflis venaxi da moweuli nayofi Tvalis dasanaxavadac ar kmarodes. es me erTxel amixsna hainrih belenma, romelic didi TanagrZnobiT mogvepyro, roca maris muceli moeSala. saubarSi Tavis Tavs man uwoda `uflis venaxis Savi muSa, rogorc sulieri ganwyobilebis, aseve gasamrjelos TvalsazrisiT~. saavadmyofodan xuT saaTze gamovbrundiT. radgan tramvais fuli ar gvqonda, fexiT gavudeqiT gzas da saxlamde mivacile. roca karTan Seyovnebulma gasaRebebis asxmula amoiRo, arafriT gansxvavdeboda im muSisagan, Ramis cvlidan rom brundeba daRlili da gauparsavi. mivxvdi, ra Zneli iqneboda misTvis, Seesrulebina axla mesa, aRsavse mTeli im saidumloebebiT, romelTa Sesaxeb miyveboda xolme mari. hainrihma kari gaaRo. derefanSi Semogvegeba buzRuna, fostlebSi fexgayrili ekonomi qali, romelsac SiSvel fexebze kani erTianad gayviTleboda. is qali arc monazoni iyo, arc hainrihis deda da arc RviZli da. _ ra ambavSi xarT, ra ambavSi xarT? _ CaibuzRuna ekonomma qalma. daswyevlos RmerTma ucolo kacis ubadruki yofa. sruliad ar makvirvebs, zogierT kaTolikes rom eSinia Tavisi qaliSvili mRvdels saxlSi miugzavnos da arc is makvirvebs, sabralo mRvdlebi zogjer sisuleleebs rom sCadian. kinaRam xelaxla davureke leos konviqtSi Cibuxis mwevel yruCuna berikacs: mindoda masTan `xorciel Jinze~ melaparaka. sxva nacnobebTan darekvisa meSinoda. vifiqre, ucxo kaci
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ukeT gamigebs-meTqi. siamovnebiT vkiTxavdi, sworad mesmis Tu ara kaTolicizmis arsi. CemTvis amJamad mxolod oTxi kaTolike arsebobs: papi ioane, alek ginesi, mari da yofili mokrive, axla ukve moxucebuli zangi gregori, romelic erTxel kinaRam msoflio Cempioni gaxda, axla ki gaWirvebiT gahqonda Tavi varieteebSi Zalosnuri nomrebis CvenebiT. drodadro erTmaneTs gastrolebis dros vxvdebodiT. uaRresad Tvinieri, WeSmaritad morwmune kaci, mesame ordenis wevri iyo, aTletur mkerds yovelTvis beris olari ufaravda. umravlesobas igi gonebaClung kacad miaCnda, radgan iSviaTad Tu ityoda rames da kitrisa da puris mets arafers Wamda, Tan ki iseTi Ronieri iyo, rom arafrad uRirda me da mari avetatebineT da TojinebiviT vetarebineT oTaxSi. iyo kidev ramdenime adamiani, romlebic SemeZlo kaTolikeebad CameTvala: karl emondsi, hainrih beleni da agreTve ciupfneri. maris kaTolikobaSi TandaTan eWvi mepareboda: misi `metafizikuri SiSi~ CemTvis yovelTvis gaugebari iyo da Tu axla wabrZanda da ciupfnerTan imasve akeTebs, rasac Cven vakeTebdiT, maSin iseT raRacas sCadis, rasac mis wignebSi araorazrovnad qmris Ralati da mruSoba ewodeboda. misi `metafizikuri SiSi~ mxolod da mxolod iman gamoiwvia, rom me uari vuTxari, Cveni colqmruli urTierToba kanonierad gagveformebina da Svilebi kaTolikeebad aRgvezarda. marTalia, Svilebi jer ar gvyavda, magram mudam imaze vlaparakobdiT, ras CavacmevdiT, rogor davelaparakebodiT, rogor aRvzrdidiT. yvela sakiTxSi vTanxmdebodiT, marto kaTolikuri aRzrda gvirTulebda saqmes. me Tanaxma viyavi, bavSvebi mogvenaTla, magram marim miTxra, amisaTvis Seni werilobiTi Tanxmobaa saWiro, Torem ise eklesiaSi jvars ar dagvwereno. bolos eklesiaSi jvris dawerazec davTanxmdi, magram gamoirkva, rom amisaTvis xelic unda gvqonoda oficialurad mowerili. maSin ki davkarge moTmineba da maris vuTxari, modi, cotac movicadoT, erT weliwads araviTari mniSvneloba ara aqvs-meTqi. mari atirda da miTxra: warmodgena ara gaqvs, ras niSnavs CemTvis ase cxovreba, Tanac arc imis imedi maqvs, rom Cveni Svilebi qristianulad
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aRizrdebiano. es ukve aRar momewona, radgan cxadi gaxda, rom xuTi weliwadi am sakiTxze sxvadasxva enaze vlaparakobdiT. me marTla ar vicodi, rom jer oficialuri xelmowera iyo saWiro da mxolod amis Semdeg meZleoda ufleba, jvari damewera eklesiaSi. es ki, rogorc saxelmwifos davaJkacebul moqalaqes da im `mamakacs, romelic Tavis saqcielze savsebiT agebs pasuxs~, unda mcodnoda. iseve ar vicodi yovelive es, rogorc adre ar vicodi, rom TeTri Rvino sufraze Caciebuli unda moitanon, wiTeli ki _ SemTbari. cxadia, vicodi, rom arsebobs qorwinebis saregistracio biuroebi, sadac saqorwino ritualebs atareben da saTanado mowmobebs iZlevian, magram megona, aseTi dawesebulebebi arsebobs urwmunoTaTvis anda iseTi morwmuneebisaTvis, romelTac surT saxelmwifos patara sixaruli moutanon. rogorc ki gavige, Tu ginda eklesiaSi jvari daiwero, jer aseT dawesebulebas unda ewvioo, namdvilad gavbrazdi, xolo roca marim isic miTxra, werilobiTi valdebuleba unda ikisro, rom Cvens Svilebs WeSmarit kaTolikeebad aRvzrdiTo, waviCxubeT. me es gamoZalvad momeCvena da ar momewona, mari ase Tvinierad rom Tanxmdeboda werilobiTi valdebulebis gacemaze. mas uamisodac SeeZlo moenaTla Svilebi da ise aRezarda, rogorc saWirod miiCnevda. im saRamos SeuZlod iyo, daRlili da gafiTrebuli Canda. melaparakeboda sakmaod xmamaRla da roca vuTxari, kargi, geyofa, yvelafers gavakeTeb, amgvar qaRaldebsac movawer xelsmeTqi, gabrazda da miTxra: _ axla Sen amas sizarmacis gamo akeTeb da ara imitom, rom gjera wesrigis abstraqtuli principebis uflebamosileba. vaRiare, rom amas marTlac sizarmace makeTebinebda da kidev is, rom Zalian mindoda, mTeli sicocxle gverdiT myoloda. oRond CemTan yofiliyo da imisTvisac mzad viyavi, kaTolikur eklesias mivkedlebodi. es ar vikmare da paTetikurad ganvacxade, iseTi sityvebi, rogoricaa `wesrigis abstraqtuli principebi~, im sakans magonebs, sadac adamians awameben-meTqi. Cemma ganzraxvam, mis SesanarCuneblad kaTolike gavmxdariyavi, mari Seuracxyo. me ki megona, Tavi movuqone, cotaTi gadavaWar70

be kidec-meTqi. mari marwmunebda, axla saqme me da Sen ki aRar gvexeba, aramed wesrigso. yvelaferi es moxda saRamo Jams, hanoveris erT-erTi Zvirad Rirebuli sastumros oTaxSi, sadac yava Tu moiTxove, finjans bolomde ki ara, sam meoTxedamde agivseben. aseT sastumroebSi imdenad gawvrTnili mosamsaxure personalia, rom finjnis yaviT gavseba mdabiurobad miaCniaT da kelnerebma gacilebiT ukeT ician, ra ekadreba didkacobas, vidre TviT didkacebma, sastumroSi rom ibRinZebian. roca aseT sastumroSi vcxovrob, Tavi sagangebod Zvir da sagangebod mosawyen internatSi mgonia. im saRamos daRlilobisagan cocxal-mkvdari viyavi, zedized sami warmodgena gavmarTe _ SuadReze foladCamomsxmelTa saaqcio sazogadoebisaTvis, naSuadRevs maswavleblobis maZiebelTaTvis, xolo saRamos varieteSi, sadac ise uxalisod mikravdnen taSs, rom ukve moaxloebul marcxs vgrZnobdi. roca am gaoxrebul sastumroSi telefoniT SevukveTe, ludi oTaxSi moetanaT, oberkelnerma iseTi civi xmiT miTxra `ki batono~, TiTqos wunwuxi momeTxovos. magram arc es makmares da ludi vercxlis tolCiT momarTves. daviRale, mindoda ludi damelia, cota xans riC-raCi meTamaSa, abazana mimeRo, saRamos gazeTebi wamekiTxa da maris gverdiT dameZina. marjvena xeli mis mkerdze damedo, xolo pirisaxe ise axlos mimetana mis TavTan, rom maris Tmis surneleba ZilSic megrZno. jerac mesmoda yurSi taSi, uxalisod rom mikravdnen. bevrad ufro adamianuri iqneboda, mayureblebs cerebi dabla daexaraT. magram, gulmoyirWebulebma, Cemi nomrebi qedmaRlurad arad Caagdes da es iseve ugemuri iyo, rogorc idioturi vercxlis tolCiT morTmeuli ludi. ubralod, me Tavi ar mqonda msoflmxedvelur Temaze mesaubra. _ me swored im saqmeze gelaparakebi, hans, _ miTxra marim odnav xmadabla da ver mixvda, rom sityvebs `im saqmeze~ CvenTvis garkveuli mniSvneloba hqonda. etyoba, yvelaferi daiviwya. farTo sawolis ukan mari bolTas scemda da roca xelebs aiqnevda, sigaretiT ise marjved apobda haers, rom kvamlis patara bolqvebi wertilebs emsgavsebodnen. sxvaTa Soris, siga71

retis moweva iswavla. Ria mwvane puloverSi mari lamazi Canda. qaTqaTa saxis kani hqonda, Tma uwindelze metad Camuqeboda, mis kiserze pirvelad davinaxe myesebi. _ Semibrale, _ vuTxari me, _ damacade, gamoviZino, xval ki sauzmis dros kidev erTxel visaubroT yvelaferze da, upirveles yovlisa, im saqmeze. magram marim angariSi ar gamiwia, Semobrunda, sawolis win gaCerda da tuCebis moxazulobaze Sevatyve, mis amgvar qcevas raRac iseTi mizezi asazrdoebda, raSic Tavis Tavsac ki ar utydeboda. roca sigareti moqaCa, piris kuTxeebSi ramdenime naoWs movkari Tvali, rac adre ar SemimCnevia. marim Tavi gaaqnia, damxeda, Semdeg amoioxra, Setrialda da isev aqeT-iqiT daiwyo siaruli. _ veraferi gamigia, _ vuTxari daRlilma. _ jer im raRac gamomZalvel sabuTze xelis moweris gamo waviCxubeT, Semdeg qorwinebis oficialurad gaformebis gamo. bolos, erTzedac Tanxmoba ganvacxade da meorezedac, Sen ki ufro gabrazebuli xar, vidre manamde iyavi. _ diax, _ mipasuxa man, _ Seni gadawyvetileba naCqarevad mimaCnia, Tanac vgrZnob, Sexla-Semoxlisa geSinia. kacma rom Tqvas, ra ginda? _ Sen mindixar, _ vupasuxe me. ar vici, ukeTesi ra unda uTxras kacma qals. _ wamoiRe saferfle da damiweqi gverdiT. ase gacilebiT ukeT visaubrebT. aRar SemeZlo misi TandaswrebiT warmomeTqva sityva `saqme~. marim Tavi gaaqnia, saferfle sawolze damido, fanjarasTan mivida da gareT gaixeda. me SevSindi. _ Cvens saubarSi raRac ar momwons, Seni sityvebiT ar laparakob. _ aba, visi sityvebiT? _ mkiTxa man rbilad da misma xmam kvlav momatyua. _ Sens sityvebs bonis, Tqveni wris, zomervildis, ciupfneris da RmerTma icis, kidev visi suni udis. _ iqneb, Sens yurebs undaT is gaigonon, rac Senma Tvalebma naxes, _ miTxra man zurgSeqceulma.
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_ Seni veraferi gamigia, _ vuTxari daRlilma, _ mainc ras gulisxmob? _ oh, _ wamoiZaxa man, _ ise laparakob, TiTqos ar icode, am qalaqSi rom kaTolikeebis yriloba tardeba. _ plakatebs ki movkari Tvali, _ vuTxari me. _ da azradac ar mogivida, rom SeiZleba heriberTi da prelati zomervildi aq arian. ar vicodi, ciupfners Tu heriberTi erqva, magram roca marim es saxeli warmoTqva, maSinve mivxvdi, viszec iyo laparaki, da kvlav gamaxsenda, rogor modiodnen xelixelCakidebulni. hanoverSi ufro meti mRvdeli da monazoni aRmoCnda, vidre am qalaqs Seefereboda, da es mec momxvda TvalSi, magram sul ar mifiqria, mari nacnobs Tu Sexvdeboda aq. vTqvaT da asec moxda... roca oriode Tavisufali dRe mqonia, me da mari bonSi CavdiodiT da iq mas SeeZlo guli ejerebina mTel `wresTan~ SexvedriT. _ aq arian, Cvens sastumroSi? _ vkiTxe qancgamoleulma. _ diax, _ miTxra man. _ mere ratom ar Semaxvedre isini? _ iyavi ki aq, mTeli kvira daexetebodi _ es braunSvaigi, es hildeshaimi, celeo... _ axla Tavisufali var, daureke, CavideT qveviT barSi da rame davlioT. _ aq aRar arian, dRes naSuadRevs gaemgzavrnen. _ moxaruli var, rom mogiwia ase didxans da ase uxvad gesunTqa, marTalia, importirebuli, magram mainc `kaTolikuri haeri~, _ vuTxari me. es gamoTqmac man moigona da ara me. xandaxan ityoda, netav isev vsunTqavde kaTolikur haerso. _ ratom brazob? _ mkiTxa man. mari isev quCisaken iyo pirSeqceuli da kvlav sigarets eweoda. sigaretis TavgamodebiT qaCva iseve ucxo meCveneboda, rogorc misi sityvebi. im wuTSi mari CemTvis ucxo qali iyo, lamazi, magram naklebad inteligenti, romelic raRac sababs eZebda wasasvlelad. _ ar vbrazob, _ vupasuxe me, _ da Sen es ici. aba, miTxari, rom ici.
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maris araferi uTqvams, mxolod Tavi damiqnia. naxevar saxes vxedavdi misas da esec sakmarisi aRmoCnda, mivxvedriliyavi, rom cremls Zlivs ikavebda. mereda, ratom ikavebda? gana ar jobda etira didxans da cxared? maSin wamovdgebodi, mklavebSi movimwyvdevdi da vakocebdi. magram ase ar moviqeci. ar mindoda. Cveulebis an movaleobis gamo ki qals ver vakoceb. isev piraRma viweqi da vfiqrobdi, mari mTeli sami dRe ciupfnerTan da zomervildTan atarebda dros da CemTvis amis Sesaxeb araferi uTqvams. cxadia, Cemzec ilaparakebdnen. ciupfneri kaTolike eriskacTa centralur gaerTianebas xelmZRvanelobda. ar vici, ramden xans vyoymanobdi _ naxevar wuTs, erT Tu or wuTs, magram bolos mainc wamovdeqi da marisTan mivedi. man Tavi gaaqnia, Cemi xelebi mxrebidan moiSora da isev daiwyo laparaki `metafizikur SiSsa~ da wesrigis principebze. iseTi grZnoba Semeqmna, TiTqos oci wlis SerTuli myoloda. mari aRmzrdelis toniT melaparakeboda, me ki metismetad daRlili viyavi imisaTvis, rom mis argumentebs Rrmad Cavwvdomodi da amitom waviyrue. ganzrax Sevawyvetine laparaki da vuambe, rogor Cavflavdi varieteSi pirvelad am sami wlis ganmavlobaSi. fanjarasTan erTmaneTis gverdiT videqiT da quCas gavcqerodiT. sastumros win yovel wuTs Cerdebodnen taqsebi, romelTac kaTolikuri komitetis wevrebi: monazvnebi, mRvdlebi da friad seriozuli eriskacni sadgurze mihyavdaT. erT jgufSi Snicleri Sevicani, metismetad darbaisluri garegnobis moxuc monazons manqanis kari dauWira. Snicleri Cvens saxlSi rom cxovrobda, evangelisti iyo. man an rjuli gamoicvala, anda yrilobas eswreboda rogorc evangelistTa meTvalyure. am kacisagan yvelaferi iyo mosalodneli. sastumrodan Cemodnebi gamohqondaT da sastumros msaxurebs gasamrjelos sCridnen xelSi. ise daRlili da moSlili viyavi, rom Tvalwin yvelaferi erTmaneTSi mereoda: taqsebi, monazvnebi, sinaTleebi, Cemodnebi. yurSi ki ganuwyvetliv mesmoda momakvdinebeli kantikunti taSi. marim karga xania Sewyvita monologi wesrigis principebze da aRarc sigarets eweoda.
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roca fanjaras movcildi, ukan gamomyva, mxarze xeli momxvia da TvalebSi makoca. _ Sen iseTi sayvareli xar, _ miTxra man, _ iseTi sayvareli da iseTi daRlili. magram roca mec davapire xeli momexvia misTvis, Cumad miTxra: _ ar ginda, gTxov, ar ginda. Sevcdi, xeli gavuSvi. usaSvelod daRlili gauxdelad mivegde loginze da imwamsve CameZina. meore diliT, roca gameRviZa da mari aRar damxvda, didad ar gamkvirvebia. magidaze baraTi ido: `me unda wavide im gziT, romliTac unda viaro~. mari TiTqmis ocdaxuTi wlisa iyo da SeeZlo, cotaTi ukeTesi ram moefiqrebina. marTalia, amis gamo ar gamikicxavs, magram rogorRac mecotava. maSinve davjeqi da grZeli werili mivwere, sauzmis merec mivwere. bolos yoveldRe vwerdi werils da bonSi fredeboilis misamarTze vgzavnidi, magram pasuxi arc erTze ar mimiRia. 9 sanam fredeboilTanac vinme movidoda telefonTan, karga xani gavida. zumeris gabmuli xma maRizianebda. uecrad warmovidgine, rom CaZinebuli frau fredeboili telefonis zarma gamoaRviZa. magram Zils Tavi ver waarTva da isev CaeZina. zarma kvlav dareka, frau fredeboils isev gaeRviZa da me ganvicade iseTive tanjva, rogoric telefonis daJinebulma wkrialma mis yurebs miayena. is iyo yurmilis dadebas vapirebdi, magram TavSi gamielva, ra mZime dReSic viyavi, da rekva ganvagrZe. TviT fredeboili rom gameRviZebina Rrma Zilisagan, didad ar Sevwuxdebodi: eg vaJbatoni mSvidi Zilis Rirsi ar aris. avadmyofurad pativmoyvare kacia. cali xeli, albaT, mudam telefonze udevs, raTa saswrafod darekos an aiRos yurmili, roca urekaven saministros ganyofilebaTa ufrosebi, redaqtorebi, centraluri komitetebi, mowinave kavSirebi da misi partiis Tavkacebi. magram misi coli marTla miyvars. igi jer kidev mowafe iyo, roca fre75

deboilma kaTolikeTa wreSi miiyvana. mis Semxedvares guli mikvdeboda, ijda TavisTvis da lamaz Tvalebs ar aSorebda Teologiur-sociologiur sakiTxebze mokamaTeebs. vatyobdi, cekva an kino met siamovnebas mianiWebda. zomervildi, visTanac es Sexvedra gaimarTa, wamdauwum mekiTxeboda: `Zalian gcxelaT, Snir?~ veubnebodi, prelato, ara mcxela-meTqi, Tumca ofli wurwuriT Camomdioda Sublsa da loyebze. bolos veRar gavuZeli maT ybedobas da aivanze gavedi. mTeli es yayani swored fredeboilis moyvanilma qaliSvilma gamoiwvia. uecrad, sruliad uadgilod, swored maSin, roca saubari provincializmis masStabebsa da sazRvrebs exeboda, xmamaRla ganacxada, benis zogierTi nawarmoebi sakmaod kargia da momwonso. amis Tqma iyo da fredeboili, romlis sacoledac igi iTvleboda, WarxaliviT gawiTlda, radgan kinkelma Tavisi erT-erTi mravlismetyveli mzera styorcna: `nuTu aqamde veraferi Seagnebine?~. amis Semdeg sabralo gogonas TviT kinkelma Seagnebina, rac iyo saWiro, da mkacrad gaaSalaSina, xolo SalaSinad mTeli evropa gamoiyena. cqriala gogona miwasTan gaaswores, burbuSela aqeT-iqiT cvioda da me guli momdioda laCar fredeboilze, romelic ver gamoesarCla Tavis sacoles, radgan kinkelis `Tanamoazre~ iyo da erT ideologiur mimarTulebas ekuTvnodnen. axlac ar vici, memarcxeneebi iyvnen Tu memarjveneni, magram romeliRac mimarTulebas ekuTvnodnen da kinkeli moralurad valdebulad racxda Tavs, fredeboilis sacole gamoesworebina. qaliSvilis dasacavad arc zomervilds amouRia xma, Tumca kinkelisa da fredeboilis mowinaaRmdege mimarTulebas ekuTvnoda, oRond ar vici, romels. Tu fredeboili da kinkeli memarcxeneebi iyvnen, maSin zomervildi memarjvene iyo an, iqneb, piriqiT. marisac wauvida ferifuri. ras izamda! ganaTlebuli xalxi moswons _ ai, amas verafriT gadavaCvie. kinkelis farTo ganaTlebam momavali frau fredeboilic moxibla. igi kinkelis sityvaWarb darigebas lamis uzneobamde misuli oxvriTac ki aRiqvamda. is kaci qariSxaliviT daatyda Tavs, dawyebuli sulieri
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mamebiT, damTavrebuli brextiT, araferi daaklo da, roca sulmoTqmuli aivnidan davbrundi, yvelani ganadgurebulni damxvdnen da kruSons miirTmevdnen. mTeli es aliaqoTi imis gamo atyda, rom sabralo arsebam ganacxada, benis zogierTi nawarmoebi sakmaod kargia da momwonso. axla igi jer ocdaori wlisac ar aris, fredeboilisagan ki ukve ori Svili hyavs. telefoni kvlav rekavda maT binaSi da warmovidgine, sruliad umweo da dabneuli rogor dafusfusebda Cvilis boTlebiT, sapudreebiT, saxvevebiTa da kremebiT xelSi. amave dros, Tvalwin damidga Cvilis dazvinuli WuWyiani TeTreuli da samzareuloSi daxvavebuli gaqonili, gaurecxavi WurWeli. erTxel, roca TavianTi laybobiT guli gamiwyales, me mas puris gaficxebaSi, buterbrodis momzadebasa da yavis moxarSvaSi mivexmare. pirdapir vityvi: aseTi saqmis keTeba naklebad mezizReba, vidre zog-zogebTan saubari. metismetad moridebuli xma gavigone. _ diax, gismenT, _ am xmam mimaxvedra, rom samzareuloSi, saabazanosa da saZinebelSi gacilebiT meti uwesrigoba sufevda, vidre odesme. amjerad arafris suni ar meca, mxolod vigrZeni, xelSi sigareti eWira. _ Sniri gaxlavarT, _ vuTxari me da velodi, rom Cemi darekviT gaxarebuli, Cveulebisamebr, wamoiZaxebda: `ah, Tqven kvlav bonSi xarT, ra kargia!~ an sxva raime amdagvars, magram amjerad darcxvenili dumda, Semdeg ki uxalisod miTxra: _ sasiamovnoa. aRar vicodi, ra meTqva. uwin yovelTvis mekiTxeboda, rodis SemoivliT CvenTan, ras gviCvenebT axalso. axla ki krintic ar dauZravs. me uxerxulad vgrZnobdi Tavs, magram ara Cem gamo, aramed mis gamo, radgan CemTvis es mxolod guldasawyveti ambavi iyo, misTvis ki gamawameblad uxerxuli. _ ra iqna werilebi? _ vTqvi bolos gaWirvebiT, _ werilebi, maris Tqvens misamarTze rom vugzavnidi? _ CvenTan aris, _ miTxra man, _ gauxsneli dagvibrunda ukan. _ ra misamarTze ugzavnidiT?
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_ ar vici, _ miTxra man, _ Cemi qmari ugzavnida. _ ki magram, ukan dabrunebul werilebze xom dainaxavdiT, ra misamarTsac awerda? _ Tqven ra, dakiTxvas miwyobT? _ o, ara, _ vuTxari rbilad, _ sruliadac ara, ubralod gulubryvilod megona, rom ufleba mqonda, davinteresebuliyavi, ra mouvida Cems werilebs. _ romelTac daukiTxavad gvigzavnidiT, ara? _ Zvirfaso frau fredeboil, gTxovT, cota meti adamianoba gamoiCinoT, _ vuTxari me. man xmadabla gaicina, magram mainc gavigone, TqmiT ki araferi uTqvams. _ Cemi azriT, _ ganvagrZe me, _ zogierT sakiTxSi adamianebi, Tundac ideologiuri mosazrebiT, adamianobas iCenen. _ Tqveni azriT, aqamde araadamianurad viqceodi? _ diax, _ vupasuxe me. man isev Zalze xmadabla, magram mainc gasagonad gaicina. _ Zalian mwyins yvelaferi, rac moxda, magram mets verafers getyviT. saqme isaa, rom yvelas Zalian gagvicrueT imedi, _ Tqva man bolos. _ rogorc klounma? _ vkiTxe me. _ am mxrivac, _ miTxra man, _ magram ara marto am mxriv. _ Tqveni qmari, etyoba, Sin ar aris? _ ara, _ mipasuxa man, _ ramdenime dReSi dabrundeba, winasaarCevno sityvis warmosaTqmeladaa wasuli eifelSi. _ ra TqviT? _ vkiTxe gakvirvebulma. es marTlac axali ambavi iyo. _ nuTu qristian-demokratiuli kavSiris saxeliT? _ ratomac ara, _ mipasuxa man iseTi xmiT, rom cxadad vigrZeni, siamovnebiT dakidebda yurmils. _ ra gaewyoba, _ vuTxari me, _ kadnierebaSi xom ar CamomarTmevT, rom gTxovoT, werilebi ukan gamomigzavnoT? _ sad? _ bonSi, Cems misamarTze. _ bonSi xarT? _ mkiTxa da momeCvena, TiTqos mzad iyo eyvira: `ra RvTis risxvaa~.
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_ naxvamdis, _ vuTxari me, _ gmadlobT aseTi kacTmoyvareobisaTvis. vwuxdi, ase cudad rom moviqeci, magram Zal-Rone gamomelia. samzareuloSi gavedi, macivridan koniakis boTli gamoviRe da didi ylupi movsvi. roca davrwmundi, veraferi miSvela, kidev erTxel moviyude, magram Sveba ver vigrZeni. yvelaze naklebad frau fredeboilisagan movelodi gawbilebas. megona, gauTavebel qadagebas mohyveboda qorwinebaze, misayvedurebda marisadmi damokidebulebis gamo. zogjer igi ise iqceoda, rogorc jiuti, magram mainc saTno dogmatikosi. roca bonSi Camovdiodi da vurekavdi, xSirad xumrobiT mTxovda xolme, erTxel kidev damexmareT samzareulosa da bavSvebis oTaxis dalagebaSio. etyoba, an me Sevcdi mis SefasebaSi, anda isev fexmZimed da cud gunebaze iyo. ar meyo siTamame, kidev erTxel damereka da mekiTxa, ra dagemarTaT-meTqi. Cem mimarT igi yovelTvis Tavaziani iyo da misi saqcielis axsna mxolod imiT SemeZlo, rom, albaT, fredeboilma dautova `zusti instruqcia~, rogor gavewbilebine. xSirad mimiqcevia yuradReba, rom colebi Wkuis dakargvamde loialurni arian TavianTi qmrebisadmi. frau fredeboili metismetad axalgazrda iyo da, albaT, ar hqonda Segnebuli, ra Zlier matkenda guls misi arabunebrivi sicive. man arc is icoda, rom fredeboili mxolod karieristi da ybedi kaci iyo da dawinaurebisaTvis arafris winaSe ar daixevda ukan, xolo Tu gzaze gadaeRobeboda, sakuTar bebiasac ki gaTelavda. etyoba, man cols uTxra: `Sniri unda CamoviSoroT~ _ da frau fredeboilmac ubralod momiSora. igi xom morCili coli iyo. adre, roca fredeboili fiqrobda, rameSi gamovadgebodi, mis colsac hqonda ufleba keTilad mompyroboda, da es savsebiT Seesabameboda mis bunebas. axla ki Tavisi bunebis sawinaaRmdegod ulmoblad unda mompyroboda. iqneb, orives usamarTlod vwamebdi cils da ise iqceodnen, rogorc sindisi ukarnaxebdaT. mari Tu ciupfnerze gaTxovda, sxvis cols xom ar Semaxvedrebdnen, codvas xom ver Caidendnen, xolo is garemoeba, rom ciupfneri fredeboilisTvis saWiro kaci iyo centralur kavSirSi, sindiss sulac ar
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umZimebda maT. cxadia, kargad da marTebulad unda moiqcnen maSinac, roca viRacas Tu raRacas maTTvis sargebloba moaqvs. TviT fredeboils ise ar dauwyvetia guli CemTvis, rogorc misma colma damwyvita. fredeboilis imedi arasodes mqonia, arc is faqti gamkvirvebia, axla qristian-demokratiul kavSirs rom exmareboda arCevnebSi. koniakis boTli isev macivarSi Sevdgi da amjerad ukve sabolood. umjobesia yvela kaTolikes Camovureko da movrCe maTTan saqmes. rogorRac gamovfxizldi, Tan roca samzareulodan saerTo oTaxSi gavedi, aRarc ki vkoWlobdi. winkarSi garderobi da cocxebis saTavsis karic ki Jangisferi iyo. kinkelTan darekva sasikeTos arafers miqadda, magram misi nomeri mainc avkrife. kinkeli yovelTvis ise iqceoda, TiTqos Cemi xelovnebiT aRtacebuli iyo. saerTod, visac Cveni xelobisa rame gaegeba, icis, scenis muSis umniSvnelo Seqebac ki msaxiobis guls sixaruliT ise avsebs, rom gaskdomas aRaraferi uklia. mindoda qristiani kinkelisaTvis saRamos simyudrove damerRvia, garda amisa, erTi faruli azric ar mSordeboda _ iqneb, maris adgilsamyofeli gamimxilos-meTqi. kinkeli maTi wris Tavkaci iyo, Teologiasac swavlobda, magram Semdeg erTi lamazi qalis gamo Teologiaze guli aiyara da gadawyvita, iuristi gamxdariyo. axla mas Svidi Svili hyavda da `erT-erT uniWieres social-politikosad~ miaCndaT. iqneb, marTlac niWieri kaci iyo, magram amis gansja sad SemeZlo. sanam kinkels gavicnobdi, marim wasakiTxad momca misi erTi broSura `gzebi axali wesrigisaken~. wigni momewona, warmovidgine, rom kinkeli iyo maRali, qera, faqizi mamakaci, magram gamacnes da sinamdvileSi igi aRmoCnda patara, msuqani, janRoniT savse kaci, xolo Tma Savi da xSiri hqonda. verafriT davijere, rom es kinkeli iyo. SeiZleba mis mimarT imitomac var usamarTlo, rom iseTi garegnoba ar hqonda, rogoric warmomedgina. roca mari aRtacebuli axsenebda kinkels, moxuci derku80

mi ityoda xolme, `kinkel-koqteili~ cvladi Semadgeneli nawilebis nareviao _ marqsi plus guardini anda blua plus tolstoi. kinkelTan pirvelive stumrobaze me da mari uxerxul mdgomareobaSi aRmovCndiT. mivediT metismetad adre, kinkelis Svilebs erTi aliaqoTi hqondaT, batebiviT yiyinebdnen, davobdnen, vaxSmis Semdeg sufra vin unda aalagoso. maT yiyiniTve awynarebdnen. kinkels jer kidev ar hqonda lukma gadaylapuli, magram mainc gaRimebuli Semogvegeba da cdilobda Cveni naadrevi stumrobiT gamowveuli gaRizianeba daefara. Semdeg gamoCnda zomervildi. igi arafers ReWavda, mxolod kbilebdakreWili ifSvnetda xelebs. binis siRrmeSi avad Wyaodnen kinkelis Svilebi, rac sruliad ar esadageboda kinkelis Rimils da zomervildis kreWas. erTxans gvesmoda, rogor ulawunebdnen bavSvebs silebs, Semdeg kari magrad mixures, magram me vicodi, mixurul kars miRma bavSvebi adrindelze ufro Zlier kiodnen da wiodnen. me maris gverdiT vijeqi da, aRelvebuli, sigarets sigaretze veweodi. sadRac oTaxebSi amtydarma aurzaurma sruliad amomagdo kalapotidan. zomervildi maris elaparakeboda da saxeze ucvleli, `Semwynarebluri da yvelafris mimtevebeli~ Rimili dasTamaSebda. mas Semdeg, rac me da mari saxlidan gaviqeciT, pirvelad CamovediT bonSi. mowiwebisa da siamayisagan aRelvebuli mari gafiTrebuliyo. kargad mesmoda misi _ axla mTavari iyo, kvlav Serigeboda eklesias. zomervildi moridebiT eqceoda, xolo kinkeli da zomervildi swored is adamianebi gaxldnen, romelTac mari mowiwebiT Sescqeroda TvalebSi. marim zomervildTan warmadgina. roca isev davsxediT, prelatma mkiTxa: _ xom ar enaTesavebiT mura naxSiris mompovebel Snirebs? amgvarma kiTxvam gamabraza. mSvenivrad icoda, visac venaTesavebodi. bonSi bavSvmac ki icoda, rom mari derkumi, romelic RvTismoSiSad iTvleboda, mura naxSiris mompovebel erT-erT SnirTan erTad gaiqca saxlidan `gamosaSvebi gamocdebis win~. zomervildisaTvis pasuxi ar gamicia, man ki gaicina da miTxra:
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_ zogjer babuaTqvenTan erTad sanadirod davdivar, mamaTqvens ki xandaxan bonis keTilSobilTa kavSirSi vxvdebi, sadac skats vTamaSobT. brazi am sityvebmac momgvares. arc iseTi briyvi iyo, rom efiqra, am ymawvils uxeiro nadirobasa da keTilSobilTa kavSirze suleluri ybedobiT Tavs movawonebo. Tumca arc iseT STabeWdilebas tovebda, uxerxulobis gamo eTqva rame. bolos mec amoviRe xma: _ sanadirod dadixarT? me ki megona, kaTolike sasuliero pirebs nadiroba akrZaluli aqvT. uxerxuli dumili Camovarda. mari gawiTlda, aRelvebuli kinkeli oTaxSi darboda da korpsaZrobs eZebda. kinkelis colma, romelic swored am dros Semovida oTaxSi, mariliani nuSi zeTisxilian minis TefSze dayara. zomervildic gawiTlda, rac sruliad ar uxdeboda, saxe isedac sakmaod wiTeli hqonda. _ ar megona, protestanti Tu amdenad gaTviTcnobierebuli iqneboda, _ miTxra man wynarad, magram mainc odnav gaRizianebulma. _ protestanti ar gaxlavarT, magram amgvari sakiTxebi maris ainteresebs da mec amitom mainteresebs, _ vuTxari me. sanam kinkeli Rvinos gvisxamda, zomervildma miTxra: _ yvela kanons aqvs gamonaklisi, batono Snir. Cemi winaprebi mTavari metyeveebi iyvnen da es profesia memkvidreobiT mamidan Svilze gadadis. mas rom mxolod `metyeve~ eTqva, gavugebdi, magram mTavari metyeveo, rom Tqva, guneba isev amemRvra da mainc xma ar amomiRia. ukmayofileba mxolod saxeze mewera. amis Semdeg TvalebiT laparakze gadavediT. frau kinkelma TvaliT aniSna zomervilds: `Tavi daanebe, xom xedav, saSinlad axalgazrdaa~. zomervildma TvalebiTve upasuxa: `axalgazrdacaa da sakmaod uzrdelic~. kinkelma ki, romelic Rvinos misxamda, me miTxra TvalebiT: `RmerTo Cemo, ra axalgazrda xarT jer~, xolo maris hkiTxa: _ mama rogor brZandeba, Zveleburadaa, xom?
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sabralo mari imdenad gafiTrebuli da dabneuli iyo, rom xma ver amoiRo da Tanxmobis niSnad Tavi dauqnia. am dros zomervildma Tqva: _ Cveni Zveli, sikeTiT savse, RvTismoSiSi qalaqi ra iqneboda baton derkumis gareSe. isev momeria brazi. batonma derkumma miTxra, zomervildi kaTolikuri skolis mowafeebs afrTxilebs, magisgan kanfetebi da fanqrebi ar iyidoTo. _ batoni derkumis gareSe Cveni Zveli, sikeTiT savse, RvTismoSiSi qalaqi kidev ufro binZuri iqneboda, _ vTqvi me, _ rac unda iyos, derkumi fariseveli mainc ar aris. kinkelma gaocebiT Semomxeda, Wiqa aswia da Tqva: _ gmadlobT, batono Snir, kargi azri STamagoneT sadRegrZelosaTvis. gaumarjos martin derkums! _ mis sadRegrZelos siamovnebiT davlev, _ vTqvi me. frau kinkelma kvlav TvalebiT uTxra qmars: `igi marto axalgazrda da uzrdeli ki ara, utifaric yofila~. verafriT gavige, ratom irwmuneboda mogvianebiT kinkeli, Cveni pirveli Sexvedra im saRamos yvelaze sasiamovno iyoo. cota xnis Semdeg movidnen fredeboili, misi sacole, monika zilvsi da viRac fon zeverni, vis Sesaxebac mis mosvlamde iTqva, marTalia, rjuli Seicvala da gakaTolikda, magram mainc uwindeburad daaxloebulia social-demokratebTano. es ambavi ratomRac Wkuis dasakargav sensaciad miiCnies. fredeboili pirvelad im saRamos gavicani da masTanac iseTive urTierToba davamyare, rogoric sxvebTan. miuxedavad yvelafrisa, yvelani simpaTiur kacad mTvlidnen, me ki, aseve miuxedavad yvelafrisa, yvelas antipaTiur adamianebad vTvlidi, garda fredeboilis sacolisa da monika zilvsisa. rac Seexeba fon zeverns, igi arc simpaTiuri meCveneboda da arc antipaTiuri. mosawyeni kaci iyo. etyoba, mtkiced gadaewyvita, sabolood damSvidebuliyo im sensaciuri faqtis Semdeg, rjuli rom Seicvala da mainc germaniis social-demokratiuli partiis wevri darCa. igi iRimeboda, Taflad iRvreboda, xolo misi odnav gadmokarkluli Tvalebi TiTqosda ambobdnen: `SemomxedeT, es me var~! Cemi
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azriT, fon zeverni cudi kaci ar unda yofiliyo. fredeboili gansakuTrebul yuradRebas iCenda Cemdami, TiTqmis sami meoTxedi saaTi melaparaka beketsa da ioneskoze, gauTaveblad laybobda da me mivxvdi: yvelaferi, rasac ambobda, aqa-iq hqonda amokiTxuli. fredeboils gadatkecili, lamazi, didpiriani saxe netarebisagan gaubrwyinda, roca briyvulad vaRiare, beketi ar wamikiTxavs-meTqi. yvelaferi, rasac ambobda, imdenad nacnobi meCveneboda, TiTqos sadRac ukve amomekiTxa. kinkeli fredeboils aRtacebiT Sescicinebda TvalebSi, zomervildi ki irgvliv iyureboda da TvalebiT ambobda: `rao, Cven, kaTolikeebi, visze naklebi varT~. yvelaferi es xdeboda manamde, vidre locvas daiwyebdnen. _ odilo, me mgoni, SegviZlia daviwyoT locva, heriberTi, albaT, dRes ar mova, _ Tqva bolos kinkelis colma. uecrad yvela maris miaCerda da maSinve swrafad moaSores mzera. ver gavige, ra iyo am damTrgunveli dumilis mizezi. mxolod mogvianebiT, hanoveris sastumros nomerSi amexila Tvali, maSin mivxvdi uecrad, ciupfners heriberTi rom erqva. mogvianebiT ciupfneri mainc movida. locva ukve damTavrebuli hqondaT da axla gacxarebuli msjelobdnen im saRamosTvis SerCeul Temaze. momewona maris saqcieli: rogorc ki ciupfnerma zRurbls gadmoabija, mari Seegeba, TvalebSi Sexeda da mxrebi umweod aiCeCa. ciupfneri yvelas RimiliT mogvesalma da Cem gverdiT dajda. amis Semdeg zomervildma ambis moyola daiwyo: erTi kaTolike mwerali didxans cxovrobda erT qmargayril qalTan da roca, bolos da bolos, SeirTo, erTma gavlenianma prelatma aseTi ram uTxra: `Zvirfaso bezevic, ra grjidaT, nuTu jvardauwerlad cxovreba ar SegeZloT?~. am ambavze yvelas gaecina, icinodnen TavSeukaveblad, xolo frau kinkeli uxamsadac ki. erTaderTi, visac ar gaucinia, ciupfneri iyo da amitom misdami simpaTiiT ganvimsWvale. gacinebiT arc maris gaucinia. cxadze cxadi iyo, es ambavi zomervildma imitom gviambo, rom CemTvis daenaxvebina, ra didsulovani, Tbili, gonebamaxvili da gulRiaa kaTolikuri eklesia. isini arc ki dafiqrebulan imaze, rom me da mari dauqorwineblad
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vcxovrobdiT. amis Semdeg me vuambe maT erTi muSis ambavi. is muSa Cveni karis mezobeli iyo, gvarad frelingeni. isic xelmouwerlad cxovrobda gareubanSi erT qmargayril qalTan da mis sam Svils arCenda. erT dRes frelingenTan mRvdeli mivida da sruliad seriozulad, muqariTac ki mosTxova, uzneo cxovrebaze xeli aeRo. frelingenma, romelic RvTismoSiSi iyo, is lamazi qali da misi sami Svili saxlidan gayara. movyevi imasac, rac Semdeg moxda: Svilebi rom erCina, qali garoskipda, frelingeni ki galoTda, radgan is qali marTla uyvarda. iseve, rogorc yovelTvis, roca me rames vambobdi, amjeradac damTrgunveli siCume Camovarda, magram mcire xnis Semdeg zomervildma gaicina da miTxra: _ batono Snir, gana SeiZleba am ori ambis Sedareba? _ ratomac ara, _ vupasuxe me. _ Tqven rom bezevics icnobdeT, amas ar ityodiT, _ miTxra gaafTrebulma, _ qristian mweralTa Soris, visac ki Cven vicnobT, bezevici yvelaze faqizi grZnobebis kacia. uecrad mec gavcofdi da vuTxari: _ gana Tqven ki iciT, ra faqizi grZnobebi hqonda frelingens da ra qristiani muSa iyo. man mxolod Tavi gaaqnia, Semomxeda da, sasowarkveTilma, xelebi cisken aRapyro. saubari Sewyda, mxolod monika zilvsis xveleba ismoda drodadro. Tumca sanam fredeboili CvenTan iyo, maspinZels ar unda Sineboda saubris Sewyvetis. fredeboili maSinve SeiWra xanmokle dumilSi, saRamosaTvis SerCeul Temas daubrunda da daaxloebiT saaT-naxevari ilaparaka imaze, Tu ra SedarebiTia siRaribis cneba. bolos kinkelsac mieca SesaZlebloba, moeyola anekdoti im kacze, visac usaSvelod uWirda, vidre TveSi xuTasidan sami aTas markamde iRebda. ciupfnerma sigareti imitom mTxova, rom sircxviliT gamowveuli siwiTle Tambaqos kvamliT daefara. roca bolo matarebliT kiolnSi davbrundi, mec iseve cudad vgrZnobdi Tavs, rogorc mari. Zlivs SevagroveT bonSi gasamgzavrebeli fuli _ mari im saRamoze did imedebs amyarebda da ar undoda, mipatiJebaze uari gveTqva. marto sulierad ki
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ara, fizikuradac cudad vgrZnobdiT Tavs, radgan WamiT TiTqmis araferi gviWamia, daleviT ki imaze meti davlieT, risi Tavic gvqonda. gza usasrulo gveCvena da roca kiolnis dasavleT sadgurze gadmovediT, Sin fexiT wavediT, transportis fuli ar gvqonda. davreke Tu ara kinkelis binaSi, viRac maSinve movida telefonTan. _ alfred kinkeli gismenT, _ momesma Tavdajerebuli biWis xma. _ Sniri gaxlavarT, _ vuTxari me, _ SeiZleba mamaTqveni damalaparakoT? _ romeli Sniri brZandebiT, Teologi Tu klouni? _ klouni, _ vupasuxe me. _ ah, _ miTxra man, _ imedia, am ambavs mZimed ar ganicdiT. _ mZimed? _ vkiTxe daRlilma, _ ki magram, ras ar unda ganvicdide mZimed? _ gazeTi ar wagikiTxavT? _ romeli gazeTi? _ `bonis xma~, _ miTxra man. _ mkacrad makritikeben? _ vkiTxe me. _ o, me Tu mkiTxavT, es ukve dasamarebas udris. gindaT, movitano da xmamaRla wagikiTxoT? _ ara, gmadlobT, _ vupasuxe me. biWis xmaSi mkafiod ismoda sadisturi bgerebi. _ gazeTs mainc unda gadaavloT Tvali, Wkuis saswavleblad gamogadgebaT. RmerTo Cemo, pedagogiuri midrekilebebic hqonia, gavifiqre me. _ visi werilia? _ viRac qosTerTisa, _ mipasuxa man, _ etyoba, Cveni korespondentia ruris olqSi. werili brwyinvaledaa dawerili, magram TviTon avtori sulmdabali yofila. _ gasagebia, igi xom qristiania. _ Tqven ara?
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_ ara, _ vupasuxe me, _ darwmunebuli var, mamaTqvens ver damalaparakebT. _ gvTxova, nu SemawuxebTo, magram Tqveni gulisaTvis siamovnebiT Sevawuxeb. pirveli SemTxveva iyo, rom sadizmi gamomadga. _ gmadlobT, _ vuTxari me. gavigone, rogor dado magidaze yurmili, rogor gaiara oTaxSi, Semdeg ki binis siRrmidan isev momesma gaborotebuli sisini. iseTi grZnoba dameufla, TiTqos gvelebis ojaxSi Cxubi atyda: ori mamali da erTi dedali gveli erTmaneTs daeria. yovelTvis vwuxvar, roca Cemda uneburad mowme vxdebi iseTi ambebisa, Cemi yurebisa da TvalebisaTvis rom ar aris gankuTvnili da arc telefoniT sunis SegrZnebis mistikuri unari maniWebs sixaruls, radgan esec tvirTia. kinkelis binaSi xorcis naxarSis iseTi mZafri suni idga, TiTqos xari moexarSoT. sisini TandaTan Zlierdeboda da viRacis sicocxles safrTxe emuqreboda. sadacaa an vaJiSvili moklavs mamas, an deda _ vaJiSvils. gamaxsenda laokooni da is ambavi, rom mTeli es ayalmayali (mesmoda xelCarTuli Cxubis xma, wivilkivili, wamoZaxilebi: `sazizRaro mxeco~, `ugulo Roro~) xdeboda im kacis saxlSi, romelsac germanuli kaTolicizmis `rux kardinals~ uwodebdnen, CemTvis didad sasixarulo ar iyo. gamaxsenda gaTaxsirebuli boxumeli qosTerTi, romelic mTeli guSindeli saRamo, albaT, telefonze ekida da gazeTis redaqcias Tavisi werilis teqsts ukarnaxebda, am diliT ki Cemi oTaxis kars TavmoWril katasaviT fxaWnida da keTil qristianad mohqonda Tavi. etyoba, kinkeli Svils, am sityvis pirdapiri mniSvnelobiT, xelebiTa da fexebiT uwevda winaaRmdegobas, rom telefonTan ar mosuliyo, misi coli ki _ amas oTaxSi atexili xmaurisa da moZraobis mixedviT vxvdebodi _ kidev ufro sastiki winaaRmdegi iyo amisa. magram maTi vaJiSvilic sastik uars ambobda, eTqva CemTvis, Sevcdi, mama Sin ar ariso. uecrad sruli siCume Camovarda, aseTi siCume icis, roca vinme sisxlisagan icleba. es siCume marTlac icleboda sisxlisagan. am dros mZime na87

bijebis xma momesma, gavigone, rogor aiRo viRacam magididan yurmili, magram megona, imwamsve dakidebda. kargad maxsovda, sad idga kinkelis binaSi telefoni _ barokos stilis sami madonadan erT-erTis qveS. am madonas kinkeli yvelaze iaffasians eZaxda. lamis vnatrobdi, yurmili daekida. kinkeli mecodeboda, radgan misTvis axla CemTan laparaki saSineleba iqneboda. piradad me am laparakisagan arafers movelodi, arc fuls da arc sasargeblo rCevas. Cemamde rom aqoSinebul xmas moeRwia, kinkeli Semecodeboda, magram misi xma axlac iseTive mWeqare da energiuli iyo, rogoric yovelTvis. erTxel viRacam misi xma mebukeTa mTel batalions Seadara. _ alo, Snir, _ aroxroxda igi, _ didebulad moiqeciT, rom damirekeT. _ alo, doqtoro, _ vuTxari me, _ Sav dReSi var. gesli me mxolod sityva doqtorSi Cavaqsove, radgan igi iseTive axalgamoCekili doqtori honoris causa1 iyo, rogoric mamaCemi. _ Snir, _ miTxra man, _ gana Cven iseTi urTierToba gvaqvs, rom batoni doqtori miwodoT? _ warmodgena ara maqvs, rogori urTierToba gvaqvs, _ vuTxari me. man metismetad mWeqared gaicina: vitalurad, energiulad, kaTolikurad, `barokos sixalise~ meniSna. _ Zveleburad momwonxarT, _ miTxra man. Zneli dasajerebeli iyo. misi azriT, albaT, ise Zalian daveci, rom xeliskvra aRar Rirda _ meti raRa unda momsvloda. _ Tqven axla kriziss ganicdiT, _ miTxra man, _ magram eg araferia. jer axalgazrda xarT, moerieT sakuTar Tavs da yvelaferi mogvardeba. sityvebma `moerieT sakuTar Tavs~ Cveni mosamsaxure ana da mecxre qveiTi polki gamaxsena. _ ras gulisxmobT? _ vkiTxe rbilad.
honoris causa (h.c.) (laT.) _ gansakuTrebuli damsaxurebisaTvis disertaciis daucvelad doqtoris samecniero xarisxis miniWeba.
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_ ras da, Tqvens xelovnebas, Tqvens karieras _ miTxra man. _ amaze sul ar mifiqria, _ vuTxari me, _ rogorc mogexsenebaT, xelovnebaze principulad ar vlaparakob, karieraze ki miT umetes. me sxva ram mainteresebs... me minda... me veZeb maris. mas raRacnairi gaurkveveli bgerebi aRmoxda Rrutunisa da boyinis magvari. binis siRrmidan kvlav moisma sisini, magram ufro yrud. kinkelma yurmili magidaze dado da mcire xnis Semdeg isev aiRo, misi xmac ufro dabali da yru momeCvena. mivxvdi, pirSi sigara Caido. _ Snir, _ miTxra man, _ gadausviT warsuls xazi, Tqveni awmyo Tqvens xelovnebaSia. _ warsuls? _ vkiTxe me. _ erTi scadeT da warmoidgineT, rom Tqveni coli sruliad moulodnelad sxvasTan gaiqca. igi dumda da ratomRac momeCvena, TiTqos meubneboda, netav, gaqceuliyoo. Semdeg ki tuCebis wklapuniT sigara moqaCa da miTxra. _ jer erTi, mari Tqveni coli ar iyo, meorec, masTan Svidi Svili ar gagiCeniaT. _ maSasadame, Cemi coli ar iyo, ara? _ vkiTxe me. _ nu ahyvebiT anarqistul romantizms, kaci ara xarT? _ miTxra man. _ dalaxvros eSmakma, _ vTqvi mwyralad, _ swored imitom miWirs, mamrobiT sqess rom vekuTvni... rac Seexeba Svilebs, Svidi Svilis gaCenas ra daudgeba win. mari mxolod ocdaxuTi wlisaa... _ Cemi azriT, kaci is aris, _ miTxra man, _ vinc yvelafers uZlebs. _ es azri metismetad qristianulia, _ vuTxari me. _ RmerTo, nuTu Tqven unda maswavloT, ra aris qristianuli? _ diax, _ vupasuxe me, _ ramdenadac vici, kaTolikuri eklesiis TvalsazrisiT, coli da qmari suliT da xorciT erTni arian. _ marTali brZandebiT.
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_ vTqvaT, qal-vaJi orjer da samjerac daqorwinda samoqalaqo Tu saeklesio wesebis dacviT, magram suliT da xorciT erTni ar arian, gamodis, col-qmari ar yofilan. _ hm, _ aRmoxda mas. _ momismineT, batono doqtoro, _ vuTxari me, _ Tu ar gagiZneldebaT, sigaras xom ar gamoiRebdiT piridan. yvelaferi ise JRers, gegoneba, aqciebis kursze vsaubrobT. Tqveni tuCebis wklapuni ratomRac amazrzenad moqmedebs Cemze. _ es ukve metismetia, _ miTxra man, magram sigara piridan mainc gamoiRo. _ daixsomeT, am saqmeze rogorc gindaT, ise ifiqreT, es Tqveni saqmea, magram froilain derkumi sxvagvarad fiqrobs da ise iqceva, rogorc sakuTari sindisi ukarnaxebs. SemiZlia isic giTxraT, rom sworadac iqceva. _ Tu asea, Tqve bilwo kaTolikeebo, ratom arc erTi Tqvengani ar meubneba, sad aris mari, ratom mimalavT? _ Tavs sasacilod nu ixdiT, Snir, Sua saukuneebSi rodi vcxovrobT. _ jobda Sua saukuneebSi gvecxovra, _ vuTxari me, _ maSin me mas xasad davisvamdi da sindisis marwuxebiT suls ver amoxdidiT, magram araferia, mari mainc dabrundeba CemTan. _ Tqvens adgilas me ase Tavdajerebuli ar viqnebodi, Snir, _ miTxra kinkelma. _ cudia, rom metafizikuri azrovneba TqvenTvis organulad ucxoa. _ maris araferi uWirda manamde, sanam mxolod Cems sulze zrunavda, magram Tqven STaagoneT, rom sakuTar sulzec unda izrunos da mas Semdeg yvelaferi Setrialda. axla me, e. i. kaci, visTvisac organulad ucxoa metafizikuri azrovneba, mis sulze vzrunav. namdvil codvilad mxolod maSin iqceva, roca ciupfners gahyveba colad. Tqveni metafizikisa amdeni mainc gamegeba: rasac axla mari sCadis, uzneoba da mruSobaa, xolo prelati zomervildi maWanklis rols TamaSobs. kinkelma gacineba ki SeZlo, magram ara ise mWeqared. _ Tu gaviTvaliswinebT imas, rom heriberTi germanuli kaTolicizmis saerTo mRvdelmTavaria, xolo prelati zomer90

vildi _ saeklesio, Tqveni sityvebi marTlac sasacilod JRers. _ Tqven ki kaTolicizmis sindisi xarT, _ vuTxari gacofebulma, _ amave dros, kargad iciT, rom me marTali var. erTxans dumda, Tavis saxlSi, venusbergze, barokos yvelaze iaffasiani madonas qveS idga da qSinavda. _ Tqven gansacvifreblad axalgazrda xarT da mSurs Tqveni... _ moeSviT Cems axalgazrdobaze laparaks, doqtoro, nu gancvifrdebiT da nurc gSurT Cemi. Tu mari ar damibrundeba, Tqvens yvelaze macdunebel prelats sicocxles gamovasalmeb, ubralod movklav, _ ganvucxade pirdapir, _ radgan dasakargi aRaraferi maqvs. mas araferi upasuxia da me mivxvdi, sigara isev Caido pirSi. _ CemTvis gasagebia, _ vuTxari me, _ rom axla Tqveni sindisi gamalebiT muSaobs. me rom ciupfneri movkla, kmayofili darCebiT: mas ar uyvarxarT, Tanac TqvenTvis metismetad memarjvenea. samagierod, prelati zomervildia Tqveni sayrdeni romSi, sadac ratomRac Tqven memarcxened gTvlian, rac, Cemi arakompetenturi azriT, usamarTlobaa. _ amoigdeT Tavidan eg sisuleleebi, Snir, ra dagemarTaT aseTi? _ kaTolikeebi nervebs miSlian, _ vupasuxe me, _ sindisnamusi ar gaaCniaT. _ protestantebi? _ mkiTxa man siciliT. _ sakuTar sindis-namusze imdens mied-moedebian, dagaoseben. _ aTeistebi? _ igi isev icinoda. _ aTeistebi mosawyeni xalxia, mudam RmerTze laparakoben. _ Tqven, Tqven viRa xarT, Snir? _ me klouni gaxlavarT da Tanac imaze ukeTesi, vidre amJamad saxeli maqvs. amqveynad arsebobs erTi kaTolike arseba, romelic aucileblad mWirdeba, _ es gaxlavT mari da maincdamainc is wamarTviT. _ sisulelea, Snir, _ miTxra man, _ eg `motacebis Teoriac~ amoigdeT Tavidan. Cven meoce saukuneSi vcxovrobT.
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_ saqmec egaa, _ vuTxari me, _ mecameteSi rigiani karis masxara viqnebodi da kardinalebsac ki ar SeawuxebdaT is ambavi, SevirTavdi maris Tu ara. axla yvela kaTolike eriskaci mis sabralo sindiss qenjnis da suleluri faratina qaRaldis gamo Ralatisa da garyvnilebisaken ubiZgebs. marTla, doqtoro, Tqveni madonebisaTvis mecamete saukuneSi SegaCvenebdnen da eklesiisagan mogkveTdnen. Zalian kargad mogexsenebaT, rom isini bavariisa da tirolis eklesiebidan moipares. Cemgan ar geswavlebaT, rom eklesiis gaZarcva dResac sakmaod mZime danaSaulad iTvleba. _ momismineT, Snir, _ miTxra man, _ Tqven ukve Cems pirovnebas exebiT, amas ki ar movelodi. _ Tqven wlebis ganmavlobaSi afaTurebT xels Cems pirad cxovrebaSi. axla ki, roca me, sxvaTa Soris, ufleba miveci Cems Tavs, mcire ram SemeniSna da TqvenTvis arasasiamovno simarTle meTqva _ cofdebiT. aba, damacadeT, fuls viSovi, daviqiraveb kerZo deteqtivs da igi uTuod daadgens, saidan moxvda Tqvens xelSi madonebi. kinkeli aRar icinoda. mxolod Caaxvela da mivxvdi, jer kidev ar sjeroda, rom ar vexumrebodi. _ dadeT yurmili, kinkel, _ ganvagrZe me, _ dadeT yurmili, Torem saarsebo minimums gagixsenebT. Tqven da Tqvens sindiss karg saRamos gisurvebT. magram igi mainc verafers mixvda da yurmilis dadebam isev me momiwia pirvels. 10 mSvenivrad vicodi, kinkeli uaRresad Tavazianad momeqca, me mgoni, fuls Tu vTxovdi, momcemda kidec. me mxolod is mirevda guls, rom, pirSi sigaragaCrili, metafizikaze melaybeboda, madonebis xsenebaze ki xelad ganawyenda. aRaraferi mesaqmeba masTan, arc frau fredeboilTan. momwydnen Tavidan! xolo Tu fredeboils sadme gadaveyrebodi, raime sababs gamovZebnidi da silas gavawnavdi. mis winaaRmdeg `sulieri iaraRiT~ brZola uazroba iqneboda. zogjer mwyins, rom duelebi aikrZala.
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ciupfnerisa da Cems davas maris gamo mxolod dueli gadawyvetda. amazrzeni is iyo, rom orTabrZolaSi isini ereodnen TavianTi wesrigis principebiT, werilobiTi gancxadebebiT da ramdenime dRe hanoveris sastumroSi saidumlo molaparakebasac ki awarmoebdnen marisTan. roca maris muceli meored moeSala, saSinlad gawvalda, ganerviulda, waramara eklesiaSi garboda da, Tu Tavisufal saRamos TeatrSi, koncertze an moxsenebaze ar mivyvebodi, Riziandeboda. kidev ufro Riziandeboda, roca vTavazobdi, riC-raCi viTamaSoT, Tan Cai davlioT da loginSi gulaRma viwveT-meTqi. yvelaferi imiT daiwyo, rom bolo dros mari xaTriT meTamaSeboda riC-raCs, mxolod imitom, an davemSvidebine, anda CemTvis Tavisi keTilganwyoba egrZnobinebina. bolo dros aRarc kinoSi damyveboda Cemi sayvareli filmebis sanaxavad _ am filmebze eqvsi wlis bavSvebic daiSvebian. vfiqrob, amqveynad aravin moiZebneba, klouns rom gaugos. klounebsac ki ar esmiT erTmaneTisa. maT Soris mudam iCens Tavs Suri an ukeTuroba. maris TiTqos esmoda Cemi, magram bolomde verc man gamigo. maris azriT, me, `rogorc Semoqmeds~, `mZafri interesi~ unda mibiZgebdes, rac SeiZleba met kulturas veziaro. rogor cdeboda! cxadia, Tavisufali saRamo rom mqonoda da mcodnoda, aqa da aq bekets dgamen, maSinve taqsiT gavemgzavrebodi. xandaxan kinoSic davdivar, SeiZleba sakmaod xSiradac, magram mxolod iseT filmebze, eqvsi wlis bavSvebsac rom uSveben. maris arasodes esmoda es. kaTolikurad aRzrdilma, zogi ram yurmokvriT icoda fsiqologiidan, zogic mistikiT Seferadebuli racionalizmidan: `sjobs fexburTi iTamaSon, vidre gogoebze ifiqron~. me ki yovelTvis siamovnebiT vfiqrobdi gogoebze, bolos ki mxolod da mxolod marize. zogjer Tavi gadagvarebul kacad mimaCnda, radgan siamovnebiT davdiodi sabavSvo filmebze, sadac ver naxavT mozrdilTa uxamsobas, mruSobasa da gayra-gamoyras. iseT filmebSi, sadac mruSobasa da gayras uCveneben, yovelTvis did rols TamaSobs viRacis bedniereba: `modi, sayvarelo, gamabedniere~ anda `Sen ginda xeli SeuSalo Cems bednierebas?!~ araferi mesmis bed93

nierebisa, romelic erT wamze metxans, vTqvaT, or-sam wams, grZeldeba. meZavebze gadaRebul namdvil filmebs siamovnebiT vuyureb, magram amgvari filmebi Zalze cotaa. umravlesoba iseTi pretenziulia, gaviwydeba kidec, meZavs rom exeba. arsebobs qalebis kidev erTi kategoria. isini arc meZavebi arian da arc meuRleebi, ubralod, gulkeTili qalebi arian, magram maTze ar iReben filmebs. sabavSvo filmebi, romelTa sanaxavad eqvsi wlis bavSvebsac ki uSveben, metwilad meZavebiT aris savse. ver gamigia, ras fiqroben filmebis damxarisxebeli komitetebi, roca aseT filmebs bavSvebisaTvis arCeven. am filmebSi qalebi an bunebiT arian meZavebi, an socialuri pirobebis gamo. gulkeTilni ki arasodes arian. veluri dasavleTis kafeSantanebSi qera qalebi kankans cekvaven, xolo uxeSi kovboebi, oqros maZieblebi da monadireebi, romelTac mTeli ori weli myrali skunsebis meti araferi unaxavT, Tvals ar aSoreben am axalgazrda, qera, lamaz qalebs. mere ki, roca kovboebi, oqros maZieblebi da monadireebi qaliSvilebs ukan mihyvebian da oTaxSi SeSvebas sTxoven, maT metwilad cxvirwin uketaven kars an vinme tlanqi Rori iseTs uTavazebs xolme, nokauti zeda aqvT. Cemi azriT, amgvarad gamoxataven isini saTnoebas. ra saqme aqvs gulqvaobas iq, sadac erTaderTi adamianuri grZnoba gulkeTiloba unda iyos. ra gasakviria, rom sabralo kovboebi erTmaneTis cema-tyepasa da revolverebis baTqabuTqze gadadian. maTTvis es igivea, rac internatis moswavleebisaTvis fexburTis TamaSi. gansxvaveba mxolod isaa, rom isini mozrdili mamakacebi arian da amitom ufro Seubralebelnic. veraferi gamigia amerikuli moralisa. Cemi azriT, amerikelebi kudianiviT dawvavdnen koconze gulkeTil qals, romelic fulisa da vnebis gamo ki ar emorCileba mamakacs, aramed imitom, rom mamakacis bunebas TanaugrZnobs. gansakuTrebiT mawamebs xelovnebaze gadaRebuli filmebi. umetes SemTxvevaSi, xelovnebaze isini iReben films, vinc van gogis suraTSi erT kolof Tambaqos ki ara, mxolod naxevars gaiRebdnen da Semdeg amasac inanebdnen, radgan mixvdebodnen, rom Tavad mxatvari mas erT saCibuxe Tambaqos fasad daTmob94

da. amgvar suraTebSi xelovanis sulieri tanjva, gaWirveba da demonTan brZola mudam warsulSia gadatanili. kinomuSakebs ar ainteresebT cocxali xelovani, romelsac sigaretis fuli ar aqvs da colisaTvis fexsacmeli ver uyidia, radgan molaybeTa samma Taobam jer ver daarwmuna, rom is geniosia. molaybeTa erTi Taoba maT dasarwmuneblad aSkarad ar kmara. marimac ki daijera `xelovanis sulis daucxromeli Zieba~. ucnauria, raRac amgvari marTlac arsebobs, oRond sxva ram unda ewodebodes. klouns marto simSvide sWirdeba, Tavis mosatyueblad mainc unda hqondes is, rasac sxvebi `Tavisufal dros~ uwodeben. sxvebs ar esmiT, rom moCvenebiTi Tavisufali dro klouns Tavisi saqmianobis dasaviwyeblad sWirdeba. ar esmiT, radgan egreT wodebuli xelovnebisaTvis isini mxolod maSin moiclian xolme, roca Tavisufali dro aqvT, rac savsebiT bunebrivia. sul sxva xalxia xelovnebas mitmasnili. isini xelovnebis garda araferze fiqroben da Tavisufali droc ar sWirdebaT, radgan ar muSaoben. did gaugebrobas iwvevs, roca cas da miwas edebian da amboben, xelovnebas mitmasnili igive xelovaniao. xelovnebas mitmasnilni swored maSin iwyeben xelovnebaze laparaks, roca xelovans hgonia, Tavisufali dro maqvso. im or, sam an xuT wuTSi, roca xelovans xelovneba aviwydeba, xelovnebas mitmasnilni iwyeben laparaks van gogze, kafkaze, Caplinze an beketze. im dros mzad var, Tavi movikla. rogorc ki viwyeb im saqmeze fiqrs, romelsac marisTan vakeTeb, ludze an Semodgomis Camocvenil foTlebze, riC-raCis TamaSze an raime motkbo, sentimentalur sisuleleze _ fredeboilis an zomervildis msgavsi adamianebi xelovnebaze swored maSin Camoagdeben sityvas. sakmarisia, dameuflos uCveulod amaRelvebeli grZnoba, rom me sruliad normaluri, filisterulad normaluri adamiani var, iseTive, rogoric karl emondsia, fredeboili an zomervildi maSinve iwyeben laqlaqs klodelze an ioneskoze. TiTqmis aseve iqceoda maric, uwin _ naklebad, bolo dros ki mouxSira. pirvelad es maSin SevamCnie, roca vuTxari, gitaraze dakvra da simRera unda viswavlo-meTqi. ama95

ze marim momigo, es Cems esTetikur instinqts Selaxavso. is, rac araxelovanisaTvis Tavisufali saRamoa, klounisaTvis samuSao droa. Tu ras hqvia Tavisufali dro, es yvelam icis _ impresariomac da yvelaze ubralo muSamac, sulerTia, isini luds svamen Tu alaskaze daTvebze nadiroben, markebs agroveben Tu impresionistebis an eqspresionistebis suraTebs (erTi ram cxadia, vinc xelovnebis nawarmoebebs agrovebs, xelovani ar aris). SeiZleba marto iman gamagiJos, rogor ukideben Tavisufal dros sigarets _ ra mixra-moxra aqvT, ra gamometyveleba, magram CemTvis es grZnoba nacnobia da, ra didxansac unda nebivrobdnen, maTi mainc ar mSurs. zogjer klounic axerxebs, ramdenime Tavisufali wami wahglijos dros, magram igi maSinve mxar-TeZoze wamowveba da, sanam sigarets naxevramde daiyvans, Tavisufali drois fasi ukve icis. is, rasac Svebuleba hqvia, momakvdinebelia. sami, oTxi Tu eqvsi kvira yvela yofila SvebulebaSi. marim ramdenjerme scada Svebulebis gemo megrZno. Cven xan zRvaze mivemgzavrebodiT, xan qveynis SuagulSi mineralur wylebze, xanac mTaSi, magram me meore dResve avad vxdebodi. tanze muwukebs mayrida da suls mkvlelobaze fiqri mimRvrevda. mgoni Surisgan vxdebodi avad. amis Semdeg maris saSineli azri mouvida TavSi _ dagvesvena iq, sadac mxolod xelovanni isvenebdnen. TavisTavad cxadia, rom im kurortze mxolod xelovnebas mitmasnilni aRmoCndnen. erT ugunur kacs pirvel saRamosve waveCxube. is kaci kinos dargSi didi vinme brZandeboda, kamaTi wamoiwyo grokze, Carli Caplinze, masxaras rolze Seqspiris dramebSi, mec amiyolia da iseTi Savi dRe mayara (xelovnebas mitmasnilni xelovnebismagvari saqmianobis wyalobiT kargad cxovroben, arsad ar muSaoben da jan-RoniT savseni arian), rom siyviTlec damemarTa. magram rogorc ki im saSinel bunags davaRwieT Tavi, maSinve gamovkeTdi. Tu rame maforiaqebs, isev sakuTari uunarobaa. vera da ver viswavle Tavis SezRudva an, rogorc Cemi agenti conereri ityoda, koncentrireba. Cems nomrebSi metismetad areulia pantomima, estrada da klounada _ kargi piero viqnebodi,
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magram SemeZlo kargi klounic vyofiliyavi. garda amisa, Zalian xSirad vcvli nomrebs. im programiT, me rom movamzade, wlebis ganmavlobaSi SemeZlo gametana Tavi. aseTia: `kaTolikuri qadageba~, `evangelisturi qadageba~, `sameTvalyureo sabWos sxdoma~, `quCaSi siaruli~ da ramdenime sxva nomeri, magram aTi an oci warmodgenis Semdeg nomeri ise mbezrdeba, rom, arc meti arc naklebi, scenaze mTqnareba amitydeba xolme. didi Zala mWirdeba imisaTvis, rom piris kunTebi davimorCilo. am dros sakuTari Tavic ki mosawyeni meCveneba. roca warmovidgen klounebs, romlebic erTsa da imave nomrebs ocdaaTi weliwadi asruleben, ise miRondeba guli, TiTqos viRacas moesajos erTi tomara fqvilis kovziT SeWma. Tu rames vakeTeb, unda mixarodes, Torem avad vxdebi. xandaxan vfiqrob, SemeZlo Jonglioric da momReralic vyofiliyavi, magram es mxolod yoveldRiuri varjiSisagan Tavis dasaZvreni fandia. dReSi, sul cota, oTxi saaTi mainc unda ivarjiSo, Tu SegiZlia eqvsi, umjobesia metic, me ki bolo eqvs kviraSi saerTod mivatove varjiSi. yoveldRe erTi-orjer davdgebodi xelebze da Tavze, yiraze gadavidodi, rezinis leibze _ am leibs yvelgan Tan davaTrev _ cotaTi wavivarjiSebdi da morCa. axla, roca muxli daSavebuli maqvs, mSvenieri sababi meZleva, rom taxtze wamovwve, sigareti movwio da sakuTari Tavis sibraluliT davtkbe. sul axali pantomima `ministris sityva~ sakmaod kargi iyo, magram gasaSarJeblad ar memeteboda. miuxedavad amisa, garkveul zRvars mainc ver gavcdi. yvela Cemi lirikuli nomeri Caflavda. aqamde ver movaxerxe adamianuri grZnobebis ise gamoxatva, rom saSineli ugvanoba ar gamomsvloda. `mocekvave wyvili~, `skolaSi wasvla da Sin dabruneba~ artistuli nomrebi iyo da amdenad ara uSavdaT ra. magram, roca vcade adamianis mier ganvlili cxovrebis gza warmomedgina, karikaturuli gamomivida. mari marTali iyo, roca Cems survils _ gitaraze dakvra da simRera meswavla _ sinamdvilidan gaqcevis cda uwoda. yvelaze metad yoveldRiuri cxovrebis absurdulobis warmodgena mexerxeboda: vukvirdebi, dakvirvebebs vajameb, Semdeg xarisxSi amya97

vs da vxsni fesvebs, magram ara im maCveneblebiT, romlebiTac xarisxSi aviyvane, aramed sxvebiT. yoveldRe, dilaobiT, sadgurze qalaqSi momuSave aTasobiT adamiani Camodis, qalaqidanac aTasobiT qalaqgareT momuSave miemgzavreba. sakiTxavia, ratom ar ucvlian es adamianebi erTmaneTs samuSao adgilebs? amas daumateT erTmaneTis sapirispirod mqrolavi avtomobilebis usasrulo nakadis jaxiri pikis saaTebSi. adamianebs samuSao an sacxovrebeli adgilebi rom gaecvalaT, SeiZleba Tavidan agvecilebina zedmeti areul-dareuloba da policielebis mier xelebis dramatulad qneva: quCebsa da gzajvaredinebze iseTi siCume damyardeboda, rom policielebi iq riC-raCsac ki iTamaSebdnen. ai, amgvari dakvirvebis safuZvelze Seiqmna pantomima, sadac gamalebiT vmuSaobdi xelebiT da fexebiT, xolo Cemi uZravi, TovliviT TeTri saxe SuaSi rCeboda. oTxi kiduriT vaxerxebdi Semeqmna uamravi gamvlelis fusfusis STabeWdileba. Cemi mizania, saTqmeli vTqva rac SeiZleba Zunwi saSualebebiT, TiTqmis urekvizitod. nomrisaTvis, romelsac hqvia `skolaSi wasvla da Sin dabruneba~, zurgCanTac ki ar mWirdeba. sakmarisia xeli, romliTac CanTa gviWiravs. tramvai zars rekavs, sadacaa daiZvreba da swored imwams gadavrbivar quCaze, vaxtebi avtobuss, Semdeg vxtebi avtobusidan. vitrinebi Tvals mtaceben, saxlis kedlebze vwer orTografiulad mcdar sityvebs, vigvianeb gakveTilze da gamwyrali maswavleblis win vdgavar, Semdeg mxridan CanTas vixsni da merxisaken miviparebi. sakmaod kargad mexerxeba bavSvis arsebobis lirizmis gadmocema. bavSvisaTvis xom banaluric ki mniSvnelovania. bavSvi martoa, gaurbis wesrigs, igi tragikuli arsebaa. bavSvs, rogorc aseTs, arasodes aqvs Tavisufali dro. Tavisufali dro mxolod maSin iCens Tavs, roca `wesrigis principebs~ eziareba. fanatikuri gulmodginebiT vakvirdebi Tavisufali drois yovelgvar gamovlenas: ai, muSa xelfass jibeSi idebs da motociklze jdeba, birJis makleri sabolood kidebs telefonis yurmils da ubis wignaks ujraSi ketavs, gastronomiuli maRaziis gamyidveli qali ixsnis winsafars, ibans xelebs, sarkis win isworebs
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Tmas, iRebavs tuCebs, iRebs xelCanTas da quCaSi gadis. yovelive es imdenad adamianuria, rom sakuTari Tavi xSirad araadamianadac ki meCveneba, radgan ra aris Tavisufali dro, es mxolod scenaze SemiZlia warmovadgino. erTxel me da mari vsaubrobdiT, aqvT Tu ara cxovelebs Tavisufali dro, magaliTad, Zroxas, roca icoxneba, an virs, roca RobesTan Tvlems. maris azriT, mkrexelobaa Tavisufali dro hqondeT im cxovelebs, romlebic muSaoben. Tavisufali dro Zilsac SeiZleba ewodos da didebulia swored imiT, rom adamians da cxovels aTanabrebs, magram Tavisufal dros maSin aqvs fasi, roca amas Segnebulad ganicdi. Tavisufali dro eqimebsac aqvT, am bolo dros ki _ mRvdlebsac. me es mabrazebs, mRvdlebs ar SeiZleba hqondeT Tavisufali dro, yovel SemTxvevaSi is mainc unda esmodeT, rom xelovani amas moklebulia. srulebiTac araa saWiro, xelovnebaSi erkveodnen, esmodeT xelovanis mowodeba, daniSnuleba da sxva amdagvari sisuleleebi, magram xelovanis bunebas ki unda icnobdnen. me da maris xSirad gvikamaTia, aqvs Tu ara RmerTs, mas rom swams, Tavisufali dro. mari marwmunebda, aqvso. gadmoiRebda Zvel aRTqmas da xmamaRla mikiTxavda samyaros Seqmnis ambavs: `da ganisvena dResa meSvidesa RmerTman~. me mis naTqvams vupirispirebdi axal aRTqmas da vamtkicebdi, Zvel aRTqmaSi SeiZleba RmerTs marTlac hqonda Tavisufali dro, magram verafriT warmomidgenia, qristes Tavisufali dro hqonodameTqi. roca me amas vambobdi, mari fiTrdeboda da meTanxmeboda. imis warmodgena, rom qristes Tavisufali dro hqonda, mkrexeloba iqneboda _ is ki isvenebda, magram, albaT, Tavisufali dro arasdros hqonia. mZinavs cxoveliviT, sizmrebs TiTqmis ar vxedav. zogjer ramdenime wuTiT CavTvlem, magram mainc mgonia, TiTqos samaradisod movwydi cxovrebas, TiTqos gavyavi Tavi kedelSi, romlis miRmac bneli usasruloba, daviwyeba da maradiuli Tavisufali dro sufevs, ganvicade is, razedac henrieTe fiqrobda xolme, roca anazdad Cogans xelidan agdebda, kovzi wvnianSi uvardeboda an swrafi moZraobiT karts cecxlSi Seagdebda
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_ sruli sicariele. erTxel vkiTxe, roca mogivlis, raze fiqrob-meTqi da man mipasuxa: _ Sen es marTla ar ici? _ ar vici, _ vupasuxe me da man CurCuliT miTxra: _ araferze, araferze ar vfiqrob. _ araferze fiqri ar SeiZleba, _ vuTxari me. _ ratom ar SeiZleba, am dros iseT sicarieles vgrZnob, Tan nasvamiviT var, ise mindeba fexsacmeli da tansacmeli gaviZro, yovelgvari tvirTi moviSoro. man isic miTxra, am didebul gancdas yovelTvis velodebi, magram arasodes mewveva maSin, roca velodebi, mudam moulodneli stumaria, maradisobis dari gancdaao. ramdenjerme aseTi ram skolaSi mouvida. magondeba aRSfoTebuli dedaCemis saubrebi telefoniT misi klasis damrigebelTan da es fraza: `diax, diax, marTali brZandebiT, es mxolod isteriaa da mkacrad dasajeT~. didebuli sicarielis msgavsi grZnoba me maSin meufleba, roca riC-raCs vTamaSob da TamaSi sam-oTx saaTze metxans grZeldeba. am dros araferi mesmis, garda kamaTlebis tkacunisa, figurebis gadaadgilebisa da msubuqi wkrialisa, roca figuras moaxvedreb. maris Wadrakis TamaSi ufro itacebs, magram riC-raCis TamaSi marisac Sevayvare. riC-raCi Cvenze narkotikiviT moqmedebda. zogjer xuTi, eqvsi saaTi gadabmulad vTamaSobdiT, kelnerebsa da moaxleebs, romelTac CvenTvis Cai an yava mohqondaT, saxeze iseTive SiSnarevi risxva eweraT, rogoric dedaCems, roca henrieTes Tavisi mouvlida. zogjer Cailaparakebdnen: `daujerebelia~, zustad ise, avtobusis mgzavrebma rom Cailaparakes, roca marisTan gatarebuli pirveli Ramis Semdeg Sin vbrundebodi. marim qulebis Caweris Zalze rTuli sistema gamoigona, qulebi iwereboda imis mixedviT, Tu sad waiqceoda Seni an mowinaaRmdegis figura. cxrili saintereso gamodga da maris oTxferi fanqari vuyide imisaTvis, rom pasiuri da aqtiuri monacemebi (es misi gamoTqmaa) ukeT CaeniSna. xandaxan riC-raCs matarebliT xangrZlivad mogzaurobis drosac vTamaSobdiT, riTac seriozul mgzavrebs
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vaocebdiT. da ai, sruliad moulodnelad SevamCnie, rom mari riC-raCs Cemi xaTriT, Cems dasamSvideblad TamaSobda _ `xelovanis suls~ xom sWirdeba ganmuxtva. am dros ki Turme sul sxva raRacebze fiqrobda. yvelaferi am oriode Tvis win daiwyo. maSin xuTi dRe Tavisufali viyavi, warmodgenebi ar mqonda, magram bonSi Casvlaze mainc uari vTqvi _ meSinoda maTi `wris~, maSinebda leosTan Sexvedra. mari ki wamdauwum gaiZaxoda, erTxel kidev unda visunTqo `kaTolikuri haerio~. movagone, im wreSi gatarebuli saRamos Semdeg ra daRlilebi, gasacodavebulebi, ganadgurebulebi vbrundebodiT bonidan kiolnSi, rogor meubneboda gauTaveblad matarebelSi: `Sen iseTi sayvareli, iseTi sayvareli xar~. Semdeg ki Cems mxarze CamoeZina da mxolod maSin krTeboda, roca konduqtori sadguris saxels wamoiZaxebda: zextemi, valberbergi, briuli, kalSoireni... yoveli aseTi wamoZaxilis Semdeg mari SekrTeboda, wamoxteboda da Semdeg isev damadebda Tavs mxarze. roca matareblidan kiolnis dasavleT sadgurze gadmovediT, marim miTxra: `jobda kinoSi wavsuliyaviT~. yvelaferi es maSin gavaxsene, roca `kaTolikuri haeris~ sunTqvaze daiwyo laparaki da SevTavaze, an kinoSi wavsuliyaviT, an sacekvaod, an riC-raCi gveTamaSa, magram man Tavi gaaqnia da bonSi marto wavida. `kaTolikuri haeri~ piradad CemTvis arafris mTqmeli sityvebia. bolos da bolos, Cven maSin qalaq osnabriuqSi viyaviT da iq haeri arafriT ar SeiZleboda yofiliyo mTlad arakaTolikuri. 11 saabazanoSi gavedi, abazanaSi monika zilvsis motanili surnelovani fxvnili Cavyare da cxeli wyali movuSvi. dabana iseve sasiamovnoa, rogorc Zili, xolo Zili iseve sasiamovno, rogorc `im saqmis~ keTeba. mari amas ase uwodebda da mec misi sityvebiT vlaparakob. verafriT Sevguebivar im azrs, rom mari ciupfnerTanac `im saqmes~ akeTebs. aseTi warmodgenisaTvis Cems fantazias iseve ar moeZebneba kunWulebi, rogorc ver mZlia cdunebam, maris TeTreulSi xeli mefaTu101

rebina. me mxolod imis warmodgena ZalmiZs, rogor TamaSobs mari ciupfnerTan riC-raCs, magram esec maSmagebs: nuTu marTla SeuZlia maris igive akeTos masTan, rasac CemTan akeTebda, da Tavi moRalated da meZavad ar igrZnos. imis uflebac ki ar aqvs, imas purze karaqi wausvas. rogorc ki warmovidgendi, ai, mari saferflidan mis sigarets iRebs da bolomde swevs, lamis goneba mekargeboda. arc is mgvrida nugeSs, rom ciupfneri ar eweoda da maris, albaT, Wadraks eTamaSeboda. raRac xom unda ekeTebinaT erTad, an ecekvaT, an karti eTamaSaT, an erTmaneTisTvis rame ekiTxaT. bolos da bolos, fulze an amindze elaparakaT. raRa rCeboda, sadils Tu mouxarSavda mxolod _ am dros ganuwyvetliv Cemze ver ifiqrebda, radgan sadils ise iSviaTad mixarSavda, rom es RalatSi an kaxpobaSi ar CaeTvleboda. yvelafers merCia, dauyovnebliv damereka zomervildisaTvis, magram jer adre iyo. gadawyvetili mqonda, Ramis sam saaTze damefrTxo misTvis Zili da xelovnebaze saubriT guli mejerebina. saRamos rva saaTi Zalze normaluri dro iyo imisaTvis, rom masTan damereka da mekiTxa, wesrigis ramdeni principiT amouyora maris muceli da ra gasamrjelo miiRo ciupfnerisagan: mecamete saukunis abatis jvari Tu meToTxmete saukunis Suarainduli madona. vfiqrobdi imazec, rogor momekla zomervildi. esTetis mokvla xelovnebis Zvirfasi qmnilebebiT jobs, ise, rom sulis amosvlisas brazi axrCobdes, xelovnebis nimuSs ase mkrexelurad ratom moeqcneno. madonas qandakeba am miznisaTvis arc ise Zvirfas qmnilebad meCveneboda, Tanac gamZle masalisagan iyo Camosxmuli, zomervildi ki guldamSvidebuli mokvdeboda, madona xom gadarCao. rac Seexeba suraTs, suraTi arc ise mZimea, SeiZleba, saamisod CarCo ufro gamomdgariyo, magram esTets kvlav sanugeSod darCeboda, suraTs araferi dauSavdao. SeiZleboda, agreTve, romelime Zvirfasi naxatidan saRebavebi Camomefxika da tiloTi damexrCo an CamomexrCo igi. Tumca arc ise advilia iseTi jan-RoniT savse kacis saiqios gastumreba, rogoric zomervildia _ maRali, tanadi, `warmosadegi garegnobis~, TmaSeWaRaravebuli, amasTanave,
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`keTili~, alpinizmiT gatacebuli pirovneba, romelic amayobs imiT, rom or omSi monawileobda da sportul SejibrebebSi vercxlis medali aqvs miRebuli. kargad gawvrTnili mowinaaRmdegea, amitomac sadRac aucileblad unda viSovo oqros an brinjaosagan Camosxmuli, sulac marmarilosagan gamokveTili xelovnebis Zvirfasi qmnileba. magram, aba, ras emsgavseboda, winaswar romSi wavsuliyavi da vatikanis muzeumidan raime nivTi amewapna. sanam abazana wyliT gaivseboda, maTi wris kidev erTi wevri _ bloTerti gamaxsenda, romelic sul orjer myavda nanaxi. igi kinkeliviT politikaSi Caxeduli da misi `memarjvene mowinaaRmdege~ iyo, magram mas `sxva faruli zraxvebi amoZravebda da sxva garemodan iyo mosuli~. bloTertisTvis ciupfneri imasve warmoadgenda, rasac fredeboili kinkelisaTvis _ erTgvar TanaSemwesa da `sulier memkvidres~. magram bloTertTan darekva iseTive ugunureba iqneboda, rogoric sakuTari binis kedlebisaTvis Semweobis Txovna. erTaderTi, rac mas cotaTi gamoacocxlebda xolme, kinkelis barokos stilis madonebi iyo. igi am madonebs ise adarebda Tavisas, rom CemTvis cxadi gaxda, ra uzomod sZuldaT masa da kinkels erTmaneTi. bloTerti raRac iseTis prezidenti iyo, ris prezidenti kinkelic siamovnebiT gaxdeboda. isini SenobiT imitom elaparakebodnen erTmaneTs, rom erT skolaSi swavlobdnen. bloTerti orjer vnaxe da orjerve SiSis grZnoba gamiCnda. igi saSualo tanis mamakaci iyo, Ria qera Tma hqonda, garegnulad ocdaxuTi wlisa gegonebodaT. roca vinme Sexedavda, Caicinebda, sanam laparaks daiwyebda, naxevar wuTs kbilebs akraWunebda. Tu oTxi sityva dascdeboda, aqedan ori `kancleri~ da `kaToloni~ iyo da maSinve cxadi xdeboda, rom ormocdaaT wels iyo gadacilebuli, Tanac faruli biwierebebiT motexil abiturients hgavda. erTi sityviT, saSineli tipi iyo. zogjer krunCxva emarTeboda, ramdenime sityvis Semdeg ena ebmeboda, ambobda `Cveni ka... ka...ka~... da, sanam darCenil `nclers~ an `Tolons~ amoRerRavda, mebraleboda. mari meubneboda, misi inteligentoba
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pirdapir sensaciuriao, magram amis damamtkicebeli sabuTi xelT arasodes mqonia. mxolod erTxel gavigone misgan ocze meti sityva. maT wreSi sikvdiliT dasjaze Camovarda saubari. bloTerti sikvdiliT dasjas `yovelgvari SezRudvis gareSe~ uWerda mxars da me gamaoca iman, rom ar TvalTmaqcobda da sawinaaRmdegos ar amtkicebda. am dros misi saxe sazeimo kmayofilebas gamoxatavda, magram uecrad kvlav daeba ena da misi `ka... ka~... ise JRerda, TiTqos am bgerebis warmoTqmisas viRacas Tavs kveTda. zogjer me Semavlebda Tvals, Tanac iseTi gaocebiT, TiTqos sadacaa wamoscdeba `daujerebeliao~, magram mxolod Tavs aqnevda aqeT-iqiT. Cemi azriT, is, vinc kaTolike ar iyo, misTvis saerTod ar arsebobda. Tu Cvens qveyanaSi sikvdiliT dasjas SemoiReben, igi, albaT, yvela arakaTolikes sikvdiliT dasjas moiTxovs. mas colic hyavs da Svilebic, telefonic aqvs, magram vamjobine, kidev erTxel damereka dedaCemTan. bloTerti maSin gamaxsenda, roca marize vfiqrobdi. igi xom raRaciT centralur gaerTianebasTan iyo dakavSirebuli da xSiri misvla-mosvla eqneboda maTTan. maSinebda imis warmodgena, rom bloTerti, SeiZleba, maT mudmiv stumarTa Sorisac ki aRmoCeniliyo. mari Zalian miyvarda da misi boiskauturi sityvebi _ `me unda wavide im gziT, romliTac unda viaro~ _ SeiZleboda gamego, rogorc im pirveli qristianis gamosaTxovari sityvebi, mtacebeli cxovelebis SesaWmelad rom imetebs Tavs. vfiqrobdi monika zilvsze da vicodi, misi gulkeTilobiT odesme visargeblebdi. igi iseTi lamazi da mimzidvelia, rom kidev ufro naklebad Seefereboda maT wres, vidre mari. monikas yvelaferi bunebrivad gamosdioda, samzareuloSi trialic (erTxel buterbrodebis damzadebaSi mivexmare), cekvac da xatvac, Tumca misi naxatebi ar momwonda. zomervildma imdeni ram STaagona `gamocxadebisa~ da `xilvis~ Sesaxeb, rom mxolod madonebsRa xatavda. vecdebi, movaSlevino. mainc araferi gamouva, kidec rom swamdes da kargad xatavdes. madonebis xatva unda dauTmon bavSvebsa da RvTismosavebs, rameTu maT Semoqmedad ar moaqvT Tavi. damafiqra iman, SevZleb ki movaSlevino monikas madonebis xatva. igi
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diletanti ar aris, jer axalgazrdaa, ocdaori Tu ocdasami wlisa, udavod ubiwoa da es faqti SiSsa mgvris. uecrad saSineli azri damebada, kaTolikeebs gadawyvetili xom ara aqvT, monikas zigfridis roli me damakisron-meTqi. es ambavi imiT damTavrdeba, rom monika CemTan ramdenime weliwads icxovrebs da manamde momepyroba kargad, sanam wesrigis principebi ar amoqmeddeba. amis Semdeg igi bonSi dabrundeba da fon zevernze gaTxovdeba. am azris TavSi gavleba da Cemi gawiTleba erTi iyo, amitom moveSvi amaze fiqrs. monika imdenad kargi iyo, raRa imaze unda meyara javri aseTi boroti azrebiT. Tuki Sevxvdebodi, jer unda vcdiliyavi, zomervildze amecruebina misTvis guli. salonebis lomi lamis mamaCemiviT gamoiyureba. gansxvaveba maT Soris mxolod is aris, rom mamaCems didi pretenziebi ara aqvs, cdilobs, rac SeiZleba humanuri eqsploatatori iyos da am moTxovnilebas akmayofilebs. zomervilds ki, Cemi azriT, Tanabari warmatebiT SeuZlia iyos kurzalis direqtoric, impresarioc, fexsacmlis fabrikis sareklamo biuros gamgec, eleganturi Slagerebis Semsrulebelic da `ostaturad~ SeTiTxnili moduri Jurnalebis redaqtoric. yovel SabaTs wminda korbinianis eklesiaSi qadagebs. marim orjer wamaTria im eklesiaSi. sanaxaoba imdenad arasasiamovno iyo, mikvirs, sada aqvs Tvalebi zomervildis uwyebas, ramdenis nebas aZlevs. bevrad mirCevnia rilke, hofmanstali da niumeni cal-calke vikiTxo, vidre am samis narevi Tafliani wyaliviT momarTvan. qadagebis dros oflma damasxa. Cemi vegetatiuri nervuli sistema arabunebriobis gamovlenis garkveul formebs ver itans. meSinia, roca mesmis gamoTqma: `dae, yovelma arsebulma iarsebos da molivlivem ilivlivos~. amas mirCevnia, vusmino umweo, Casuqebul pastors, romelic eklesiis kaTedridan religiis gaugebar WeSmaritebebs borZikiT warmoTqvams da sulac ara hgonia, rom misi nalaparakevi `dasabeWdad mzadaa~. mari nawyeni iyo, rom zomervildis ori qadagebidan arc erTi ar momewona. magram yvelaze gamawamebeli mere iyo: qadagebis Semdeg eklesiis maxloblad mdebare kafeSi SevediT. mTeli kafe im `xelovnebas
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mitmasnilebiT~ gaivso, zomervildis qadagebas rom eswrebodnen. bolos TviTonac gamocxadda. mis irgvliv wre Seikra da am wreSi Cvenc Cagvabes. arabunebrivi nabodvari, romliTac zomervildi eklesiis kaTedridan gagvimaspinZlda, aqac orsamjer Tu oTxjer gadaReWes. erTi kalmiT naxati axalgazrda msaxiobi qali, romelsac grZeli Tma da angelozis saxe hqonda da romelzedac marim CamCurCula, `sami meoTxediT~ moqceuliao, mzad iyo zomervildisaTvis fexebi daekocna. me mgoni, zomervildic ar etyoda uars amaze. abazanis onkani davkete, pijaki gavixade, perangi da qveda sacvali gaviZre, iqve kuTxeSi mivyare da is iyo, abazanaSi Cawolas vapirebdi, rom telefonma dareka. qveyanaze mxolod erT kacs vicnob, romelsac SeuZlia telefonis zari ase energiulad da vaJkacurad aawkrialos. es gaxlavT conereri, Cemi agenti. yurmili ise axlos miaqvs pirTan da ise sulmouTqmelad laparakobs, rom meSinia, ar damdorblos. roca unda, raime sasiamovno miTxras, laparaks ase iwyebs: `guSin didebuli iyaviT~. amas ise, tyuilad meubneba, radgan warmodgena ara aqvs, marTla didebuli viyavi Tu ara. roca rame usiamovno unda mauwyos, meubneba: `gamigoneT, Snir, Tqven Caplini ara xarT~, magram amiT imis Tqma ki ar unda, rom Caplins bevrad Camovuvardebi, aramed mxolod imis, rom naklebad saxelmoxveWili var da amitom Cems Tavs iseTi raRacebis neba ar unda mivce, rac conerers aRizianebs. vicodi, rom axla conereri arc raime arasasiamovnos metyoda da arc qveynis daqceviT SemaSinebda, rogorc yovelTvis maSinebda, roca warmodgenis gamarTvaze uars vambobdi. amjerad arc imaSi damdebda brals, isteriis gamo warmodgenas Slio. iqneb ofenbaxma, bambergma da niurnbergmac ukve uari Tqves Cems warmodgenebze da amitom telefonSi miangariSebda, ramodena zarali mivayene. telefoni ganagrZobda gaSmagebiT, energiulad, vaJkacurad wkrials. erTi piroba gadavwyvite, aparatisaTvis baliSi damefarebina, magram saSinao xalaTi gadavicvi, saerTo oTaxSi gavedi da awkrialebuli telefonis win gavCerdi. impresarioebs magari nervebi aqvT da mtkiced dga106

nan fexze: iseTi sityvebi, rogorebicaa `xelovanis mgrZnobiare suli~, maTTvis iseve JRers, rogorc `dortmundis meludeTa saaqcio sazogadoeba~. maTTan laparaki xelovansa da xelovnebaze wylis nayvaa. maT isic kargad ician, rom yvelaze usindiso xelovansac ki aTasjer meti sindisi aqvs, vidre yvelaze patiosan impresarios. garda amisa, xelT aqvT iaraRi, romlis winaaRmdegac veravin verafers gaawyobs _ cxadi Segneba imisa, rom xelovans ar SeuZlia, ar akeTos is, rasac akeTebs: xatos, Tu klounia, ixetialos qalaqidan qalaqSi, imReros an qvisa Tu granitisagan `maradiuli faseulobani~ gamoaqandakos. xelovani qals hgavs, usiyvarulod arseboba rom ar SeuZlia da pirvelive Semxvedri mamali viris xelSi aRmoCndeba. yvelaze advili qalisa da xelovanis eqspluataciaa da yvela impresarios, erTidan oTxmocdacxramet procentamde, raRac scxia suteniorisa. es rekvac namdvili sutenioris rekva iyo. conererma, etyoba, qosTerTisagan gaigo, rodis wamovedi boxumidan, da danamdvilebiT icoda, Sin rom viyavi. sabanao xalaTi zonriT Sevikari da yurmili aviRe. cxvirSi ludis suni meca. _ dalaxvros eSmakma, Snir, _ miTxra man, _ ra moxda, ratom malodinebT amden xans? _ es wuTia yovlad Tvinierad abazanis miRebas vapirebdi, _ vupasuxe me. _ nuTu amgvari ram kontraqts ewinaaRmdegeba? _ Tqveni iumori CamosaxrCobad ganwiruli kacis iumoria, _ miTxra man. _ mereda, Toki sadaa, _ vkiTxe me, _ nuTu ukve Camobmulia? _ moeSviT simbolikas, _ miTxra man, _ umjobesia, saqmeze vilaparakoT. _ simboloebiT laparaki me ar damiwyia, _ vuTxari me. _ ra mniSvneloba aqvs, vin daiwyo, _ miTxra man, _ etyoba, mtkiced gaqvT gadawyvetili SemoqmedebiTi TviTmkvleloba. _ Zvirfaso batono conerer, _ vuTxari Cumad, _ Zneli xom ar iqneba, piri cotaTi moaSoroT yurmils, ludis suni pirdapir cxvirSi mcems.
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man qurdebis Jargonze Cailaparaka TavisTvis ori sityva, raRac `arifisa~ da `mayuTis~ magvari. _ siTavxedes veravin mogaSlevinebT, _ miTxra siciliT, _ raze vsaubrobdiT? _ xelovnebaze, _ vupasuxe me, _ magram Tu sawinaaRmdego araferi geqnebaT, mirCevnia saqmeze vilaparakoT. _ maSin salaparako araferi gvqonia, _ miTxra man, _ magram icodeT, Tqvenze me xels ar viReb, gaigeT? gaocebulma pasuxis gacema ver movaxerxe. _ naxevari wliT mimoqcevidan amogiRebT, Semdeg ki isev kacad gaqcevT. imedi maqvs, im boxumelma RvTis glaxam didad ar gaganawyenaT. _ rogor ara, _ vupasuxe me, _ man erTi boTli arayi wamRlita da im Tanxis sxvaobac, boxumidan bonamde pirveli da meore klasis vagoniT mgzavroba rom iZleva. _ ugunuroba gamoiCineT, honoraris Semcirebaze rom daTanxmdiT. xelSekruleba xelSekrulebaa da radgan fexi itkineT, ufleba gqondaT warmodgena SegewyvitaT. _ conerer, _ vTqvi Cumad, _ marTla aseTi adamianuri xarT, Tu... _ sisulelea, _ mipasuxa man, _ Tqven me miyvarxarT da Tu amas aqamde ver mixvdiT, ufro briyvi yofilxarT, vidre megoneT. garda amisa, Tqveni meSveobiT jer kidev SeiZleba fulis gakeTeba, oRond moeSviT loTobas, es xom bavSvobaa... conereri marTals ambobda _ rasac me vakeTebdi, marTlac bavSvoba iyo. _ rom mSvelis, _ vupasuxe me. _ ra mxriv? _ mkiTxa man. _ sulierad. _ sisulelea, _ miTxra man, _ modiT, moeSviT am suls. Cven, ra Tqma unda, SegveZlo gveCivla mainisaTvis, xelSekruleba rom daarRvies da, albaT, am saqmes movigebdiT, magram ar girCevT. naxevari weli daisveneT da Semdeg isev dagayenebT fexze. _ mereda, riT vicxovro naxevari weli? _ vkiTxe me.
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_ hoo, _ miTxra man, _ imedi maqvs, mamaTqveni jibeze xels gaikravs. _ rom ar gaikras? _ maSin ipoveT keTili megobari qali, romelic amden xans SeginaxavT. _ mirCevnia jambazoba daviwyo, _ vuTxari me, _ soflebsa da patara qalaqebs velosipediT davivli. _ cdebiT, _ miTxra man, _ gazeTebs soflebSic da patara qalaqebSic kiTxuloben da jerjerobiT axalgazrdul kavSirebsac ki ver SevaCeCeb Tqvens Tavs TiToeul gamosvlaSi oc markad. _ scadeT ki? _ vkiTxe me. _ diax, _ mipasuxa man, _ Tqven gamo mTeli dRe telefonze vekide, magram veraferi gavawyve, xalxs aravin ufuWebs gunebas ise, rogorc Sesabralisi klouni. es igivea, rom gorgolaWebian savarZelSi Camjdarma oficiantma ludi mogarTvaT. iluziebiT ityuebT Tavs. _ Tqven ara? _ vkiTxe me, magram igi dumda da amitom ganvagrZe: _ mxedvelobaSi maqvs Tqveni varaudi, rom naxevari wlis Semdeg kvlav SevZleb gamosvlas. _ SeiZleba, asec moxdes, _ miTxra man, _ magram es erTaderTi gamosavalia. ukeTesi iqneboda, mTeli weliwadi dagvecada. _ mTeli erTi weli _ vTqvi me, _ iciT, ramden xans grZeldeba erTi weliwadi? _ samas samocdaxuT dRes, _ mipasuxa man da isev mourideblad miitana piri yurmilTan. ludis sunma guli amiria. _ saxeli rom gamovicvalo? _ vkiTxe me, _ gavikeTeb sxva cxvirs, movamzadeb sxva nomrebs, gitaraze davamRereb, Jongliorobasac vcdi. _ sisulelea, _ miTxra man, _ Tqveni simRera gulis gamawvrilebelia, xolo JongliorobaSi diletanti xarT da meti araferi. yvelaferi es sisulelea. Tqven yvela monacemi gaqvT imisa, rom gvariani klouni iyoT da manamde nurafers mTxovT, Tavsac ki nu SemaxsenebT, sanam mTeli sami Tve dReSi
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rva saaTs ar ivarjiSebT. maSin gestumrebiT da Tqvens axal da, SeiZleba, Zvel nomrebsac vnaxav. oRond moeSviT mag tutucur loTobas da ivarjiSeT. dadumebuls momesma misi qoSini, Tan sigarets qaCavda. _ monaxeT iseTive erTguli arseba, rogoric is qaliSvili iyo, yvelgan rom Tan dagyvebodaT, _ miTxra man. _ erTguli arseba, _ gavimeore me. _ diax, _ miTxra man, _ yvelaferi danarCeni sisulelea. nurc imas ifiqrebT, rom uCemod gaxvalT fons da ubadruki adamianebis winaSe ijambazebT. ase SeiZleba mxolod sami kvira gaitanoT Tavi. isic SegiZliaT, Snir, rom mexanZreTa iubileebze imaimunoT da mayurebels qudiT xelSi CamouaroT, magram Tu raime amdagvarma Cems yuramde moaRwia, maSinve mogixazavT. _ ZaRliSvilo, _ mivaZaxe me. _ diax, _ miTxra man, _ ukeTesi ZaRliSvilis povna gagiWirdebaT. magram Tqven Tu TviTneburad moiqceviT da moxetiale jambazi gaxdebiT, or TveSi sruliad mogeRebaT bolo. gesmiT? am saqmeSi raRac-raRacebi gamegeba. xmas ar viRebdi. _ gesmiT? _ mkiTxa man. _ diax, _ vupasuxe me. _ Tqven me miyvarxarT, Snir, TqvenTan muSaoba siamovnebas mgvris, Torem telefoniT laparakSi amden fuls ar davxarjavdi. _ Svids gadascilda, _ vuTxari me, _ da, Cemi varaudiT, es siamovneba or-naxevari marka dagijdebaT. _ diax, _ miTxra man, _ SeiZleba, samic, magram amJamad arc erTi agenti ar gaimetebda TqvenTvis amodena Tanxas. maS ase: sami Tvis varjiSis Semdeg kvlav vxvdebiT erTmaneTs da Tqven, sul cota, eqvsi uzado nomeri mainc unda gqondeT momzadebuli. dascincleT Tqvens berikacs imdeni, ramdensac SeZlebT. naxvamdis. man marTla dakida yurmili, me ki yurmili xelSi meWira, mesmoda telefonis tutuni, raRacas velodi da mxolod xangrZlivi yoymanis Semdeg davde. conererma ramdenjerme gama110

cura, magram arc erTxel ar movutyuebivar. im dros, roca Cemi gamosvla oras ormocdaaTi marka Rirda, igi xelSekrulebas as oTxmoc markaze midebda da, Cemi wyalobiT, aSkarad karg fuls akeTebda. yurmilis dadebis mereRa mivxvdi, rom igi erTaderTi kaci iyo, visac kidev didxans vesaubrebodi siamovnebiT. mas CemTvis raRac Sansi unda moeca. naxevar wels ra momacdevinebda. nuTu ar moiZebneboda akrobatTa jgufi, sadac CemisTana kaci gamoadgebodaT. tanad msubuqi var, Tavbrusxvevisa ar meSinia da cotaodeni varjiSis Semdeg gvarianad SevZlebdi an sxva akrobatebTan erTad muSaobas, anda sxva klounebTan erTad sketCebis gaTamaSebas. mari yovelTvis meubneboda, partniori gWirdeba, maSin sakuTari nomrebi ise ar mogbezrdebao. darwmunebuli viyavi, rom conerers jer kidev ar hqonda yvela SesaZlebloba amowuruli. gadavwyvite, misTvis mogvianebiT damereka. saabazanoSi davbrundi, sabanao xalaTi gavixade, danarCeni Cvrebi kuTxeSi mivyare da abazanaSi Cavweqi. cxeli abazanis miReba TiTqmis iseve sasiamovnoa, rogorc Zili. mogzaurobis dros yovelTvis abazanian oTaxs vqiraobdi, maSinac ki, roca fuli gvaklda. mari mudam meubneboda, Seni mflangvelobis Tavi da bolo Senive warmoSobaao, magram cdeboda. Cvens saxlSi Tbil wyals iseve ufrTxildebodnen, rogorc yvelafer danarCens. civi Sxapis miReba yovelTvis SegveZlo, magram cxeli abazanis miReba Cvens saxlSic mflangvelobad iTvleboda da anac ki, romelic sxva dros raRac-raRacebze Tvals xuWavda, am sakiTxSi ulmobeli iyo. mis mecxre qveiT polkSi cxeli abazanis miReba momakvdinebel codvad iTvleboda. mari rom gverdiT ar myavda, amas abazanaSic vgrZnobdi. zogjer, roca cxel wyalSi viweqi, igi sawolze ijda da xmamaRla mikiTxavda rames. erTxel Zveli aRTqmidan solomonisa da sabas dedoflis1 ambavi wamikiTxa bolomde, meored _ makasaba _ samxreT arabeTis erT-erTi uZvelesi saxelmwifo, dasaxlebuli sakuTari damwerlobis mqone semituri tomebiT. bibliis Tanaxmad, sabas dedofali mdidruli ZRveniT ewvia israelSi solomon mefes.
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belTa brZola. zogjer mikiTxavda Tomas vulfis romansac `angelozo, moixede saxlisaken~. axla ki yvelasagan mitovebuli viweqi am sulelur Jangisfer abazanaSi. saabazanos kedlebi Savi kafeliT iyo mopirkeTebuli, xolo TviT abazana, sasapne, Sxapis saxeluri da unitazis sajdomi ficari Jangisferi iyo. maklda maris xma. Tu Cavufiqrdebi, igi ciupfnerTan erTad bibliasac ki ver waikiTxavs, maSinve eniSneba, rom moRalate an kaxpaa. aucileblad moagondeba diuseldorfis sastumro, sadac solomonisa da sabaeli dedoflis ambavs mikiTxavda xmamaRla, sanam, moTenTils, abazanaSi ar CameZina. vxedavdi diuseldorfis sastumros mwvane xaliCebs, maris muq Tmas, mesmoda misi xma. bolos man mokidebuli sigareti momitana da me vakoce. kisramde sapnis qafSi viweqi da marize vfiqrobdi. ciupfnerTan an misi TandaswrebiT mari verafers gaakeTebda ise, rom me ar gavxsenebodi. mis gverdiT kbilis pastis tubsac ki ver moaxraxnida saxuravs. Cven mravaljer gvisauzmia erTad, Raribuladac da mdidruladac, naucbadevadac da nairnairi kerZebiT gawyobil sufrasTanac, dilaadrianac da TiTqmis SuadRezec, uzomod bevri jemic gvqonia da ujemodac gavsulvarT iolas. imis warmodgena, rom mari yovel diliT erTsa da imave dros sauzmobs ciupfnerTan erTad, sanam igi manqanaSi ar Cajdeba da Tavis kaTolikur biuroSi ar wava, TiTqmis RvTismosavs mxdida. vloculobdi, rom arasdros esauzmaT erTad, vcdilobdi warmomedgina ciupfneri: misi wablisferi Tma, TeTri kani, gamarTuli weli _ ciupfneri, germanuli kaTolicizmis erTgvari alkibiade, magram naklebad Tavqariani. kinkelis azriT, ciupfneri `centrSi idga, magram mainc ufro marjvniv ixreboda, vidre marcxniv~. maTi saubris erT-erTi mTavari Tema marjvniv da marcxniv dgoma iyo. gulze xels Tu davideb, ciupfneri unda mivaTvalo im oTx pirovnebas, namdvil kaTolikeebad rom mimaCnia. eseni arian: papi ioane, alek ginesi, mari, gregori... da ciupfneri. garda imisa, rom mari Zalian uyvarda, mTavari roli mainc iman iTamaSa, rom ciupfnerma moindoma, mari codvebis
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gzidan ucodvelobis gzaze gaeyvana. maTi xelixelCakidebuli siaruli ki, etyoba, arafers niSnavda. erTxel vkiTxe kidec maris amis Taobaze. mas rogorRac sayvarlad gadahkra siwiTlem da miTxra: Cvens megobrobas `bevrma ramem Seuwyo xeli~, Cvens mamebs faSistebi sdevnidnen, orive kaTolikeebi varTo da kidev: `xom ici, rogor uWiravs Tavi, igi me axlac momwons~. abazanidan cotaodeni gacivebuli wyali gamovuSvi, cxeli davamate da surnelovani fxvnili peSviT movafrqvie. gamaxsenda mamaCemi, romelsac surnelovani fxvnilis warmoebaSic edo wili. rac unda viyido _ sigaretebi, saponi, saweri qaRaldi, wkiriani eskimo Tu sosisi _ mamaCems yvelaferSi udevs wili. ra vici, iqneb, im or-naxevar santimetr kbilis pastaSic ki aqvs wili, romelsac xandaxan vxmarob. magram Cvens saxlSi fulze laparaki dauSvebelia. yovelTvis, roca ana cdilobda dedaCemisaTvis angariSi Caebarebina da davTrebi eCvenebina, deda eubneboda: `fuli zizRs iwvevs CemSi~. drodadro mas mainc uxdeboda `u~ warmoeTqva, magram es `u~ yovelTvis `e~-saviT JRerda. jibis fuls Zalian cotas gvaZlevdnen. samagierod, bevri naTesavi gvyavs da, roca yvelas erTad moiwvevdnen, roca ormocdaaTi Tu samoci biZa da deida-mamida-bicola moiyrida Tavs, maT Soris erTi-ori keTili naTesavi zogjer cota fuls mainc Cagviyrida xolme jibeSi, radgan dedaCemis momWirneoba andazad iyo qceuli. yovelive amas isic daumateT, rom dedaCemis deda STamomavlobiT didgvarovani, fon hoenbrode iyo da mamaCems dResac miaCnia, didi pativi damdes, siZed rom mikadreso. Tumca mamaCemis simamri gvarad Tuleri iyo da mxolod misi sidedris qaliSvilobis gvari iyo hoenbrode. germanelebi dRes kidev ufro etanebian da eloliavebian gvariSvilobas, vidre 1910 wels. iseTi adamianebic ki, inteligentebad rom iTvlebian, didgvarovanTa nacnobobisaTvis Tavs iklaven. am ambavs yuradReba unda miaqcios dedaCemis centralurma komitetma, radgan esec rasobrivi sakiTxia. iseT gonier kacsac ki, rogoric babuaCemia, ver mounelebia, rom 1918 wels, roca, `ase vTqvaT~,
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yvela saWiro sabuTi mzad iyo da SnirebisTvis aznauroba unda eboZebinaT, swored gadamwyvet momentSi, kaizerma, romelsac dekretze xeli unda moewera, Tavs uSvela, germaniidan gaiqca _ albaT, sxva sazrunavi gauCnda. Tuki saerTod odesme sazrunavi hqonia. Snirebis `TiTqmis gaaznaurebis~ ambavs dResac, naxevari saukunis Semdegac ki, roca SemTxveva moecemaT, hyvebian Cvens ojaxSi. `dekreti misi udidebulesobis saqaRaldeSi ipoves~, _ imeorebs mamaCemi yovelTvis. mikvirs, dorSi rom aravin gaemgzavra da kaizers qaRaldze xeli ar moawerina. me iq cxenze amxedrebul Sikriks gavgzavnidi, maSin es saqme sakadrisad mainc mogvardeboda. gamaxsenda, mari swored maSin iwyebda Cemodnebis amolagebas, roca me ukve abazanaSi viweqi. vigonebdi, rogor idga sarkis win, rogor ixdida xelTaTmanebs, isworebda Tmas, rogor iRebda karadidan sakidrebs, Camoacmevda zed kabebs, dakidebda karadaSi da gaasrialebda TiTbris lartyaze. Semdeg fexsacmelebs miuCenda adgils, mesmoda quslebis bakuni, lanCebis sriali. bolos tualetis magidis minis zedapirze alagebda tubebs, momcro qilebs, mozrdil ferumarilian qilebs, frCxilebislaqian wvril SuSas, sapudres. am dros Cemamde liTonis mWaxe xma aRwevda. pomadas Sveulad dgamda. uecrad mivxvdi, rom cremli RapaRupiT Camomdis da saocari fizikuri movlena aRmovaCine: abazanaSi mwoliares sakuTari cremlebi civi meCveneboda. Cveulebriv, megona, cremli yovelTvis cxelia-meTqi. bolo TveebSi, simTvraleSi ramdenjerme mitiria mduRare cremliT. momagonda henrieTe, mama, rjulSecvlili leo da gamikvirda, Zmam rom aqamde xma ar momawvdina. 12 pirvelad osnabriuqSi miTxra, Seni meSiniao. maSin me bonSi Casvlaze uari ganvacxade, mas ki Zalian undoda mSobliur qalaqSi Casvla da `kaTolikuri haeris~ sunTqva. gamoTqma ar momewona da vuTxari, osnabriuqSic sakmaod bevri kaTolikeameTqi. mari marwmunebda, Cemi ar gesmis da arc ginda, gaigoo.
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Cven ukve ori dRe vcxovrobdiT osnabriuqSi, or warmodgenas Soris Tavisufali dro gamogveria da win kidev sami dRe gvedo. dilidanve wvimda, kinoebSi araferi gadioda iseTi, CemTvis saintereso rom yofiliyo, arc riC-raCis TamaSi SemiTavazebia marisaTvis, radgan winadRes riC-raCis xsenebaze iseTi saxe gauxda, rogoric aqvT xolme metismetad TavdaWeril bavSvebis momvlel qalebs. mari sawolze iwva da kiTxulobda, me ki fanjarasTan videqi, sigarets veweodi da xan hamburgis quCas gavcqerodi, xanac vagzlis moedans. wvimda. tramvai jer kidev ar iyo gaCerebuli, rom sadguris mosacdeli darbazidan misken xalxi morboda. Cven arc `im saqmis~ gakeTeba SegveZlo, radgan mari avad iyo, muceli ar moSlia, magram raRac amdagvari mouvida. xeirianad ar mesmoda, ra, da verc veravin amixsna. yovel SemTxvevaSi, maris egona, fexmZimed varo, axla ki aRar iyo. im diliT mxolod ramdenime saaTi dayo saavadmyofoSi. gafiTrebuli, daRlili da gaRizianebuli Canda. vuTxari, SenTvis axla ar ivargebs matarebliT amsigrZe gzis gavla-meTqi. Zalian mindoda, dawvrilebiT mcodnoda, ra stkioda, magram man araferi miTxra. mxolod es iyo, rom drodadro tiroda da Tanac raRacnairad ucxod, avad tiroda. Tvali movkari patara biWs, romelic marcxena mxares, vagzlis moednisaken mohyveboda quCas da, kokispirul wvimaSi Tavidan fexebamde galumpuls, CanTa win hqonda gawvdili. CanTisaTvis saxuravi aexada da iseTi saxiT mohqonda, rogorc erT suraTze minaxavs, sadac sam wminda mefes yrma iesosaTvis sakmeveli, oqro da gundruki moaqvT. saxelmZRvaneloebis sveli, TiTqmis daSlili ydebic davinaxe. biWis gamometyvelebam henrieTe momagona _ saxeze iseTive Tavganwiruloba, uniadagoba da aRmafrena aRbeWdvoda. _ raze fiqrob? _ mkiTxa marim sawolidan. _ araferze, _ vupasuxe me. biWma vagzlis moedani neli nabijiT gadaWra da sadguris SenobaSi gauCinarda. misi Semyure SiSma Semipyro. am laRad gatarebul meoTxed saaTs akivlebuli deda da Sewuxebuli
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mama xuTwuTiani axsna-ganmartebis Semdeg mwared amoadendnen cxvirSi. jibegafxekilebma, saidan uyidon axali wignebi da rveulebi. _ raze fiqrob? _ mkiTxa marim xelmeored. mindoda, isev mepasuxa, araferze-meTqi, magram Semdeg biWi gamaxsenda da vuambe, razec vfiqrobdi: rogor mivida saxlSi biWi, romelic sadRac aqve, maxlobel sofelSi cxovrobs, rogor moigona tyuili, radgan simarTles aravin daujerebda. rogor ityoda, fexi damicda da CanTa gubeSi Camivarda an erTi wuTiT CanTa saxuravis Raris qveS davde da uecrad iseTi Tavsxma wamovida, CanTaSi wyali Cavidao. yovelive amas Cumi, monotonuri xmiT vyvebodi, marim ki sawolidan momaZaxa: _ ras niSnavs es, ratom miyvebi aseT sisuleleebs? _ radgan swored amaze vfiqrobdi, roca mkiTxe. marim ar daijera biWze moyolili ambavi da me gavbrazdi. aqamde Cven arasodes mogvityuebia da arc tyuili dagviwamebia erTmaneTisaTvis. me ise aRvSfoTdi, rom vaiZule, amdgariyo, fexsacmeli Caecva da CemTan erTad sadgurze wamosuliyo. siCqareSi qolga damaviwyda. erTianad gavilumpeT. biWi, ki ver vipoveT. gaviareT mosacdeli darbazi da sadguris qristianul misiaSic ki SevixedeT. bolos baqnis kontroliors vkiTxe, am cota xanSi matarebeli Tu gavida-meTqi. diax, mipasuxa man, ori wuTis win bomTes mimarTulebiT gavida matarebelio. Semdeg vkiTxe, baqanze Tavidan fexebamde galumpuli qeraTmiani biWi xom ar daginaxavT, ai, amsimaRle-meTqi. rkinigzels raRac eWvi aReZra da mkiTxa: _ ra moxda, rame daaSava? _ ara, _ vupasuxe me, _ minda mxolod vicode, im matarebels xom ar gahyva. me da mari galumpulebi videqiT da man Tavidan fexebamde eWvis TvaliT SegvaTvaliera. _ rainis mxridan xarT? _ iseTi toni hqonda, TiTqos mekiTxeboda, nasamarTlevi xom ar xarTo. _ diax, _ vupasuxe me.
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_ amgvari cnobis gacema mxolod zemdgomi pirebis nebarTviT SemiZlia, _ miTxra man. etyoba, romeliRac rainispirelma jarSi yofnis dros mwared moatyua. erT scenis muSas vicnobdi. jarSi samsaxuris dros viRac berlinelma moatyua da mas Semdeg yvela berlineli, kacian-qalianad, pirad mtrad miaCnda. erTxel, roca scenaze berlineli akrobati qali gamodioda, man uecrad sinaTle gamorTo. sabralo qalma waiforxila da fexi moitexa. marTalia, misi mzakvroba verafriT daamtkices, yvelaferi `mokle CarTvas~ daabrales, magram me darwmunebuli var, im scenis muSam gangeb gamorTo sinaTle mxolod imitom, rom gogona berlineli iyo, igi ki jarSi viRac berlinelma mwared moatyua. osnabriuqis sadguris kontroliori ise miyurebda, rom guli gamiskda. _ me da es qalbatoni davnaZlevdiT, _ vuTxari me, _ saqme sanaZleos exeba. es ar unda meTqva, radgan vtyuodi, tyuili ki maSinve memCneva saxeze. _ ra Tqma unda, danaZlevdiT. vici, rogorc naZlevdebian rainispirelebi, _ miTxra rkinigzelma. erTi sityviT, verafers gavxdi. uecrad gavifiqre, taqsis daviWer, bomTeSi Caval, matarebels sadgurSi davxvdebi da davinaxav, rogor gadmova biWi vagonidan-meTqi, magram xom SeiZleboda, an bomTemde Camosuliyo romeliRac miyruebul sadgurze, an piriqiT bomTes Semdeg. sastumroSi Tavidan fexebamde galumpulni da gaToSilni davbrundiT. maris qveda sarTulis barisken vubiZge, daxlTan miviyvane, mxarze xeli movxvie da koniaki moviTxove. barmenma, romelic sastumros patronic iyo, ise Semogvxeda, saxezeve etyoboda, siamovnebiT gamoiZaxebda policias. winadRes Cven saaTobiT vTamaSobdiT riC-raCs da loriani purebi da Cai oTaxSi amovatanineT. diliT mari saavadmyofoSi wavida da ukan gafiTrebuli dabrunda. barmenma koniaki ise udierad mogvawoda, rom naxevari daiqca. igi gamomwvevad gvaridebda Tvals.
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_ ara gjera Cemi? _ vkiTxe maris, _ im ambavs vgulisxmob, biWze rom mogiyevi. _ rogor ara, mjera, _ mipasuxa man. magram ase imitom mipasuxa, rom Sevebrale, da ara imitom, rom marTla sjeroda Cemi. acofebda isic, vaJkacoba rom ar myofnida, barmenisTvis pasuxi momeTxova koniakis daRvrisaTvis. Cven gverdiT viRac Semzaravi axmaxi idga da piris wklapuniT wrupavda luds. yoveli mowrupvis Semdeg tuCebze modebul qafs ilokavda da ise gadmomxedavda xolme, vfiqrobdi, sadacaa gamomelaparakeba-meTqi. yovelTvis meSinia garkveuli asakis nasvami germanelis gamolaparakebisa, radgan mudam omze laparakoben da didebul ramed miaCniaT. mkvlelebi rom arian, mxolod maSin irkveva, roca uzomod Tvrebian da imasac ki amboben, `amiT qveyana ar daqceulao~. siciveatanili mari kankalebda da, roca koniakis Wiqebi monikelebul daxlze gavacure, Semomxeda da Tavi gaaqnia. madloba RmerTs, amjerad barmenma Wiqebi frTxilad mogvawoda da araferi dauRvria. gulze momeSva. Tavs laCrad aRar vgrZnobdi. axmaxma erTi Wiqa arayi gadakra da sakuTar Tavs gamoelaparaka. _ ormocdaoTxSi arays da koniaks vedroebiT vsvamdiT... ormocdaoTxSi vedroebiT... rasac ver movereodiT, quCaSi vRvridiT da cecxls vukidebdiT... arc erTi wveTi im yeyeCebs, _ kacs gaecina, _ arc erTi wveTi... me kidev erTxel mivuCoCe Wiqebi barmens. man mxolod erTi Wiqa gaavso da sanam meores gaavsebda, ise Semomxeda, TiTqos raRacis kiTxva undoda. me maSinRa SevamCnie, rom mari gverdiT aRar medga. barmens Tavi davuqnie da vaniSne, meore Wiqac gaevso. orive martom gadavkari da dResac kmayofili var, rom maSinve gavecale iqaurobas. mari sawolze iwva da tiroda. xeli Sublze davade. man Cemi xeli moiSora, nela, nazad, magram mainc moiSora. iqve, sawolze Camovjeqi da roca misi xeli xelSi aviRe, ar waurTmevia. gareT Camobnelda. mTeli saaTi vijeqi maris gverdiT, sawolze, misi xeli meWira da mxolod amis Semdeg daviwye laparaki.
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kidev erTxel vuambe Cumi xmiT im biWis ambavi. man ise momiWira xeli, TiTqos undoda eTqva, ho, mjera Senio. vTxove, dawvrilebiT aexsna, ra gaukeTes saavadmyofoSi, magram man mipasuxa: `qaluri ambavia, uwyinari, magram saSineli~. `qaluri ambavi~ SiSs mgvris, es sityvebi raRacnairi boroti idumalebiTaa moculi, radgan amgvar ambebSi sruliad umecari var. me da mari ukve sami weliwadi vcxovrobdiT erTad, roca pirvelad gavige raRac `qaluri ambebis~ Sesaxeb. ra Tqma unda, is ki vicodi, rogor uCndebodaT qalebs bavSvebi, magram detalebisa araferi gamegeboda. maSin ocdaoTxi weli Semisrulda, mari ukve sami weliwadi iyo Cemi coli da amgvari rameebi mxolod im asakSi gavige. roca mari mixvda, ra umecaric var, gaecina, Cemi Tavi mkerdze miido da ramdenjerme miTxra: `ra sayvareli, ra Zvirfasi xar~. meore adamiani, vinc am ambebSi gamacnobiera, Cemi skolis amxanagi, karl emondsi iyo. TavSi mas mudam Casaxvis sawinaaRmdego amazrzeni tabletebi utrialebda... mogvianebiT afTiaqSi wavedi, maris dasaZinebeli wamali vuyide da manamde vejeqi sasTumalTan, sanam ar CaeZina. dRemde ar vici, ra daemarTa maSin, ra garTulebebi gamoiwvia misma `qalurma ambebma~. meore diliT qalaqis biblioTekas vewvie da enciklopediaSi amovikiTxe yvelaferi, risi amokiTxvac ki am sakiTxis Sesaxeb SeiZleboda. gulze momeSva. SuadReze mari marto gaemgzavra bonSi. samgzavro CanTis meti Tan araferi wauRia. aRarc imaze Camougdia sityva, bonSi gamomyevio. _ zeg frankfurtSi SevxvdebiT erTmaneTs, _ miTxra man. naSuadRevs, roca zneobis damcvelma policiam momakiTxa, gamixarda, mari rom aq ar daxvdaT, Tumca misi wasvla saCoTiro mdgomareobaSi mayenebda. Cemi varaudiT, sastumros patronma damabezRa. cxadia, yvelgan vambobdi, mari Cemi coliameTqi, amis gamo mxolod or-samjer Tu gvqonda usiamovneba, magram osnabriuqSi Savi dRe damadga. mestumra ori moxele, samoqalaqo tansacmelSi gamowyobili qali da kaci. meqceodnen uaRresad zrdilobianad, metismetadac ki. ase, albaT, imitom gawvrTnes, rom `sasiamovno STabeWdileba~ moexdinaT,
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magram me yovelTvis maRizianebda policielebis xazgasmuli zrdiloba. qali lamazi da zomierad SeRebili iyo. igi mxolod maSin dajda, roca skami SevTavaze, bolos sigaretic ki gamomarTva. misi kolega ki am dros `SeumCnevlad~ aTvalierebda oTaxs. _ froilain derkumi TqvenTan aRar aris? _ mkiTxa man. _ ara, _ vupasuxe me, _ adre gaemgzavra frankfurtSi, sadac zeg erTmaneTs SevxvdebiT. _ msaxiobi brZandebiT? me vupasuxe, ki-meTqi. es ar Seesabameboda simarTles, magram saqmis gasaadvileblad Tanxmoba varCie. _ unda gagvigoT, _ miTxra qalma, _ Cven valdebuli varT, SerCeviT SevamowmoT Cvens qalaqSi gaCerebuli mgzavrebi, roca samkurnalo dawesebulebas abortisaTvis mimarTaven. _ yvelaferi mesmis, _ vupasuxe me, Tumca enciklopediaSi abortze araferi wamikiTxavs. mamakacsac SevTavaze, damjdariyo, magram uari Tavazianad miTxra da SeumCnevlad ganagrZobda oTaxis Tvalierebas. _ Tqveni saxlis misamarTi? _ mkiTxa qalma. me bonis misamarTi miveci. qali wamodga. misma kolegam Tvali Seavlo tansacmlis Ria karadas. _ froilain derkumis kabebia? _ mkiTxa man. _ diax, _ vupasuxe me. man mravlismetyveli TvaliT Sexeda qals. qalma mxrebi aiCeCa, mxrebi aiCeCa mamakacmac, kidev erTxel daxeda noxs, Semdeg dalaqavebuli adgilisaken daixara da ise Semomxeda, TiTqos moeloda, imwamsve gamovtydebodi mkvlelobaSi. bolos, rogorc iqna, wavidnen. mTeli am scenis dasasrulamde uaRresad zrdilobianad meqceodnen. rogorc ki kari gaixures, yvela Cemodani Cavalage, angariSi oTaxSi amovatanine, sadguridan mebarguli gamovaZaxebine da pirvelive matarebliT gavecale iqaurobas. sastumros patrons dawyebuli dRis qirac ki gadavuxade. sadgurSi bargi frankfurtSi gadasagzavnad Cavabare da samxreTisken mimaval pirvelive matarebels gavyevi. meSinoda da amitom mindoda aqedan gaqceva.
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Cemodnebis Calagebis dros maris pirsaxocze wiTeli laqa aRmovaCine. baqanze gasuls, sanam matarebelSi Cavjdebodi, jer kidev mqonda imis SiSi, uecrad vinmes mxarze xeli ar daedo da zrdilobianad ar ekiTxa uknidan: `aRiarebT danaSauls?~ me mzad viyavi, yvelaferi meRiarebina. roca bons Cavuare, SuaRame gadasuli iyo, matareblidan gadmosvla arc ki mifiqria. mgzavroba ganvagrZe da daaxloebiT dilis oTx saaTze frankfurtSi Cavedi, usaSvelod Zvir sastumroSi gavCerdi da maris davureke bonSi. meSinoda, vaiTu, saxlSi ar iyos-meTqi, magram igi maSinve movida telefonTan da miTxra: _ hans, madloba RmerTs, rom dareke, Zalian vwuxdi. _ wuxdi? _ vkiTxe me. _ ho, vwuxdi. osnabriuqSi davreke da miTxres, sadRac gaemgzavrao. axlave movdivar frankfurtSi, axlave! abazana miviRe, sauzme oTaxSi amovatanine da daviZine. Tormet saaTze marim gamaRviZa. gamocvlili meCvena. Zalze xalisiani da alersiani iyo. _ sakmarisad isunTqe kaTolikuri haeri? _ vkiTxe me. marim gaicina da makoca. policielebze araferi miambia. 13 mindoda, kidev erTxel Camematebina cxeli wyali abazanaSi, magram wyali aRar vargoda da vigrZeni, dro iyo, amovsuliyavi. abazanam muxli ver damiama, isev gasivebuli mqonda da TiTqmis veRar vxridi. abazanidan amosuls fexi damicurda da kinaRam lamaz, kafelis iatakze gaviSxlarTe. gadavwyvite, imwamsve damereka conererisaTvis da meTxova, damxmareboda, romelime akrobatul jgufs mivtmasnebodi. abazanidan amosulma, tani SevimSrale, sigarets movukide da Cemi Tavi sarkeSi SevaTvaliere. gamxdari vCandi. uecrad telefonma dareka. SeiZleba leo mirekavda. _ alo. _ o, _ momesma zomervildis xma, _ vimedovneb, ormagi saltos SesrulebaSi TqvenTvis xeli ar SemiSlia?
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_ me klouni var da ara akrobati, _ vuTxari gacofebulma, _ da gansxvaveba am or profesias Soris iseTive didia, rogoric iezuitebsa da dominikelebs Soris, xolo Tu me raime ormagis gakeTeba gadavwyvite, es iqneba ormagi mkvleloba. zomervilds gaecina. _ Snir, Snir, _ miTxra man, _ Tqveni mdgomareoba seriozulad mawuxebs. nuTu imisaTvis CamoxvediT bonSi, rom telefoniT yvelas mtroba gamoucxadoT? _ me dagirekeT? _ vkiTxe zomervilds, _ Tu Tqven damirekeT? _ ah, _ Tqva man, _ gana amas amxela mniSvneloba aqvs? araferi mipasuxia. _ Zalian kargad vici, _ ganagrZo man, _ rom ar giyvarvarT, magram nu gagikvirdebaT da me miyvarxarT. amitom ufleba unda momceT, davnergo cxovrebaSi is principebi, romlebic mwams da romelTac vicav. _ Tu dagWirdaT, ZaliTac, ara? _ ara, ZaliT ara, magram energiulad ki, _ mipasuxa man. zomervildi sityvebs mkafiod warmoTqvamda, _ ise, rogorc saWiroa im saqmeSi, CvenTvis cnobil pirovnebas rom exeba. _ ratom TqviT pirovneba da ara mari? _ imitom, rom CemTvis mTavaria, am saqmeze rac SeiZleba obieqturad vimsjeloT. _ didad cdebiT, batono prelato. es saqme imdenad subieqturia, meti rom ar SeiZleba. sabanao xalaTSi mcioda, sigareti danestianda da xrColavda. _ Tu mari ar damibrundeba, marto Tqven ki ara, ciupfnersac movklav. _ o, RmerTo, _ miTxra brazmoreulma, _ heriberTs mainc daanebeT Tavi. _ xumroba gyvarebiaT, _ vuTxari me, _ viRacam coli wamarTva, me ki mas Tavi unda davanebo, ara? _ jer erTi, ciupfneri viRac ar aris, meorec, froilain
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derkumi Tqveni coli ar iyo. garda amisa, ki ar wagarTvaT, qalma TviTon daganebaT Tavi. _ Tavisi nebiT, ara? _ diax, _ mipasuxa man, _ mxolod da mxolod Tavisi nebiT, Tumca, SeiZleba, amas bunebrivisa da zebunebrivis Sejaxebamac Seuwyo xeli. _ eriha, _ wamoviZaxe me, _ mainc ra migaCniaT zebunebrivad? _ Snir, _ Semawyvetina gabrazebulma, _ miuxedavad yvelafrisa, me mainc mjera, rom Tqven kargi klouni xarT, magram Teologiisa araferi gagegebaT. _ imdeni ki gamegeba, rom mivxvde, Tqven, kaTolikeebi, me, urwmuno kacs, iseve sastikad meqceviT, rogorc iudevelni eqceodnen erT dros qristianebs, qristianebi ki _ warmarTebs. yurebi gamomiWedeT erTisa da imaves ZaxiliT _ kanoni, Teologia. sinamdvileSi ki amas akeTebdiT qaRaldis erTi idioturi naglejis gamo, romelic saxelmwifom unda gasces, gesmiT? saxelmwifom. _ Tqven mizezsa da Sedegs erTmaneTSi urevT, Snir, magram me Tqveni mesmis, kargad mesmis. _ araferic ar gesmiT, _ vuTxari me, _ da amas, iciT, ra mohyveba? ormagi colqmruli Ralati. pirvelad mari Ralats Caidens, roca Tqvens heriberTs misTxovdeba, meored ki maSin, roca erT mSvenier dRes isev CemTan gamoiqceva. albaT, me ara var iseTi daxvewili grZnobebis patroni, iseTi didi xelovani da, rac mTavaria, imdenad kargi qristiani, rom viRac prelatma miTxras: `Snir, nuTu jvardauwerlad cxovreba ar SegeZloT~. _ Tqven ver xedavT Zireul gansxvavebas Tqvens SemTxvevasa da im SemTxvevas Soris, romelzedac maSin vdavobdiT. _ ra gansxvavebas? _ vkiTxe me. _ imas xom ara, rom bezevici Cemze ufro mgrZnobiarea da Tqveni kavSirisaTvis angariSgasawev rwmenis lokomotivs warmoadgens. _ ara, ara, _ zomervilds marTla gaecina, _ am SemTxvevaSi saqme gvaqvs saeklesio-samarTlebriv gansxvavebasTan. bezevici qmargayril qalTan cxovrobda da amitom eklesiaSi jvars ver
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daiwerda, Tqven ki... froilain derkumi qmars ar gahyria da amitom Tqvens daqorwinebas win araferi eRobeboda. _ me xelis mowerazec Tanaxma viyavi da sarwmunoebis gamocvlazec, _ vupasuxe me. _ aseTi Tanxmoba amazrzeni iyo. _ Tqven ra, gindaT viTvalTmaqco, iseTi grZnobebi da rwmena gamovamJRavno, rogoric ar gamaCnia? Tuki Tqven uflebebisa da kanonebis _ yovlad formaluri raRacis _ dacvas iTxovT, ratomRa msayvedurobT, rom raRac grZnobebi CemTvis ucxoa? _ me Tqven arafers gsayvedurobT. araferi mipasuxia. zomervildi marTals ambobda da amis Segneba mTrgunavda. marim marTla TviTon mimatova. cxadia, maT igi sixaruliT miiRes, magram maris rom CemTan darCena ndomoda, veravin aiZulebda, mivetovebine. _ alo, Snir, mismenT? _ diax, gismenT, _ vupasuxe me. masTan laparaki sul sxvagvarad mqonda warmodgenili, mindoda, Ramis sam saaTze gameRviZebina, kargad gameTaTxa da davmuqrebodi. _ riT SemiZlia dagexmaroT? _ mkiTxa man wynarad. _ arafriT, _ mivuge me, _ erTaderTi, risi gakeTebac SegiZliaT, damarwmuneT, rom hanoveris sastumroSi Tqveni marisTan molaparakebis mizezi Cemdami erTgulebis ganmtkiceba iyo, da dagijerebT. _ ar gindaT SeignoT, Snir, _ miTxra man, _ rom Tqvensa da froilain derkumis urTierTobaSi krizisma iCina Tavi. _ da Tqvenc maSinve isargebleT am ambiT, ara? _ mivuge me, _ ganumarteT maris, rogor SeeZlo gamoeyenebina kanonebi da saeklesio samarTali imisaTvis, rom damSoreboda. me ki yovelTvis vfiqrobdi, kaTolikuri eklesia gayris winaaRmdegia-meTqi. _ RmerTo Cemo, Snir, _ wamoiZaxa man, _ rogor SegiZliaT momTxovoT me, kaTolike mRvdels, rom qals xeli Sevuwyo, jvardauwerlad ganagrZos cxovreba mamakacTan. _ ratomac ara? _ vupasuxe me, _ Tqven xom mas uzneobisa
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da qmris Ralatisken ubiZgebT. da Tuki, rogorc mRvdels, SegiZliaT pasuxismgebloba ikisroT amis gamo, Tqveni nebaa. _ Tqveni antiklerikalizmi maocebs. aseTi ram mxolod kaTolikeebs axasiaTebT. _ araviTari antiklerikali me ara var. eg ram gafiqrebinaT. me mxolod antizomervildeli var, radgan usindiso da orpiri kaci brZandeba. _ RmerTo Cemo, _ wamoiZaxa man, _ es rogor gaivleT TavSi? _ Tqveni qadagebis momsmens egoneba, am kacs afrasaviT farTo guli aqvso, magram Semdeg sastumroebis salonebSi CurCulze gadadixarT da bnel fandebs xlarTavT. im dros, roca me lukmapuris saSovnelad ofls vRvridi, Tqven Cems colTan saidumlo molaparakebas awarmoebdiT ise, rom CemTvis erTxelac ar mogismeniaT. diax, usindiso da orpiri brZandebiT. Tumca sxvas ras unda moelodes kaci esTetisagan? _ kargi, mlanZReT, _ mipasuxa man, _ rac gindaT, is miwodeT. me mSvenivrad mesmis Tqveni. _ araferic ar gesmiT. Tqven maris wveTwveTobiT SeuSxapuneT sazizRari, arabunebrivi narevebisagan Sezavebuli mRvrie siTxe. me ki naturaluri sasmelebis sma mirCevnia. wyalnarev koniaks kartofilis sufTa arays vamjobineb. _ ilaparakeT, ilaparakeT, _ miTxra man, _ gulze mogeSvebaT. etyoba, am ambavma Zlier SegaryiaT Sinaganad. _ yvelaferi, rac marisTanaa dakavSirebuli, prelato, me Sinaganadac mexeba da gareganadac. _ dadgeba dRe, Snir, roca mixvdebiT, rom usamarTlod momeqeciT am saqmesTan dakavSirebiTac da saerTodac. _ igi iseTi xmiT laparakobda, TiTqos cremli adga Tvalze, _ rac Seexeba mRvrie sasmels, Tqven gaviwydebaT, rom arseboben adamianebi, romelTac swyuriaT, namdvilad swyuriaT da sul arafris dalevas, isev mRvrie sasmlis daleva urCevniaT. _ magram Tqvens saRmrTo sjulSi mTeli ambavia moTxrobili sufTa, kamkama wyalze. ratom aseT wyals ar asmevT mwyurvalT? _ iqneb, imitom, _ miTxra man, xmaakankalebulma, _ am125

jerad Tqvens Sedarebas moviSvelieb _ iqneb imitom, rom im grZeli jaWvis boloSi vdgavar, romlis meSveobiTac Widan wyals iReben. SeiZleba, me mease an meaTase rgoli var da amitom Cemamde aumRvreveli wyali ar aRwevs. da kidev erTi, Snir, mismenT? _ gismenT, _ vupasuxe me. _ SegiZliaT giyvardeT qali ise, rom masTan ar cxovrobdeT? _ ai, Turme ra yofila, _ vupasuxe me, _ axla qalwul mariamze damiwyebT laparaks. _ nu xumrobT, Snir, es Tqven ar gixdebaT. _ ra mexumreba, _ vuTxari me, _ savsebiT Semwevs unari angariSi gavuwio imas, rac ar mesmis. magram sabediswero Secdomad mimaCnia, rom roca axalgazrda qali uarzea, monasterSi wavides, aiZuleben qalwul mariams mihbaZos. am Temaze erTxel moxsenebac ki wavikiTxe. _ ras ambobT, sad? _ mkiTxa man. _ aq, bonSi, _ vupasuxe me, _ maris jgufel axalgazrda gogonebTan. im saRamoze dasaswrebad sagangebod Camovedi kiolnidan. maT jer ramdenime fokusi vuCvene, Semdeg ki qalwul mariamze vesaubre. hkiTxeT monika zilvss, prelato. me, ra Tqma unda, ar SemeZlo imaze melaparaka gogonebTan, rasac Tqven `xorciel Jins~ eZaxiT. mismenT? _ gismenT, _ mipasuxa man, _ da mikvirs, TandaTan sul ufro da ufro uxeSi xdebiT. _ dalaxvros eSmakma, prelato, _ vuTxari me, _ is procesi, romlis Sedegadac bavSvi Cndeba, sakmaod uxeSia. Tumca, Tu girCevniaT, SegviZlia TeTr yaryatze visaubroT. yvelaferi, rasac am uxeS saqmeze amboben, qadageben da aswavlian, TvalTmaqcobaa. gulis siRrmeSi Tqven es saqme migaCniaT qorwinebiT dakanonebul Rorobad bunebisagan Tavdacvis mizniT... anda iluziebs iqmniT da xorciels mijnavT imisagan, rac am saqmesTanaa dakavSirebuli. magram rTulia swored is, rac am saqmesTanaa dakavSirebuli. is colic ki, romelic qmars Zlivs itans, marto sxeuli rodia, mxolod fizikur siaxloves
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ubinZuresi loTic ki ar eZebs meZav qalTan, iseve rogorc meZavi ar eZebs mxolod amas. im saqmes Tqven ise eqceviT, rogorc saaxalwlo SuSxunas, sinamdvileSi ki dinamitia. _ Snir, _ miTxra man uxalisod, _ gaocebuli var, ramdeni gifiqriaT am saqmeze. _ gaocebuli, _ vuyvire me, _ gaocebuli im gonebaClungi ZaRlebis gamo unda iyoT, TavianTi colebi kanonier sakuTrebad rom miaCniaT. hkiTxeT monika zilvss, raze vesaubre im saRamos gogonebs. mas Semdeg, rac Sevigne, rom mamrobiT sqess vekuTvni, araferze vfiqrob imdens, ramdensac am saqmeze da Tqven es gaocebT? _ Tqven mciredi warmodgenac ki ara gaqvT samarTalsa da kanonze. ra rTulic unda iyos, is, razec vsaubrobT, rogorRac mainc unda mowesrigdes. _ diax, _ vupasuxe me, _ Tqvens wesebSi cotaTi mec gaverkvie _ bunebas Tqven TviTon ubiZgebT iqiTken, rasac colqmrul Ralats eZaxiT, xolo roca adamianis buneba qorwinebaSi iWreba, SiSi gipyrobT. hoda, codvebs inaniebT, Cadenils mogiteveben, kvlav scodavT da ase Semdeg. erTi sityviT, yvelaferi kanonierad gaqvT mowesrigebuli. zomervilds gaecina. mis sicilSi uxamsoba igrZnoboda. _ Snir, _ miTxra man, _ vxvdebi, rac gWirT. aSkarad, viriviT Tqvenc monogami yofilxarT. _ rom araferi vTqvaT homo sapiens-ze, etyoba, verc zoologiaSi erkveviT xeirianad. virebi garegnulad Canan Tvinierni, magram monogamebi srulebiT ar arian. virebSi sruli promiskuitetia gavrcelebuli. monogamebi arian mxolod yornebi, Wkebi, samnemsa maxaTebi da, nawilobriv, martorqebi. _ magram, cxadia, ara mari, _ miTxra man. etyoba, imwamsve mixvda, es sityvebi rom gulSi momxvdeboda, radgan xmadabla ganagrZo: _ vwuxvar, Snir, damijereT, bevrad ufro kmayofili viqnebodi, amis Tqma rom ar damWirveboda. xma ar amomiRia. Cauqrobeli sigaretis namwvi xaliCaze gadmovafurTxe. vxedavdi, rogor gaifanta naperwklebi da xaliCaze Savi, patara naxvretebi datova.
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_ Snir, _ wamoiZaxa man mudariT, _ nuTu ar gjeraT, rom yovelive amis Tqma miWirs. _ ra mniSvneloba aqvs, mjera Tu ara? _ vupasuxe me, _ Tu Tqven es gindaT, mjera. _ Tqven bevrs laparakobdiT bunebaze, _ miTxra man, _ amitom bunebis Zaxils unda damorCilebodiT, maris dadevnebodiT da mis gamosaxsnelad gebrZolaT. _ mebrZola, _ vuTxari me, _ gana Tqvens wyeul saqorwino kanonebSi es sityva weria? _ Tqvensa da froilain derkumis urTierTobas qorwineba ar erqva. _ keTili, _ vupasuxe me, _ ase iyos. nu davarqmevT qorwinebas, magram me TiTqmis yoveldRe vcdilobdi, davkavSirebodi telefoniT maris da yoveldRe vwerdi. _ vici, _ miTxra man, _ vici, magram axla ukve gviania. _ axla isRa damrCenia, rom aSkarad colqmruli Ralatis gzas davadge. _ Tqven amis unari ar SegwevT, _ miTxra man, _ ukeT gicnobT, vidre ggoniaT. mlanZReT, damemuqreT, ramdenic gnebavT, magram mainc getyviT: yvelaze saSineli Tqvens arsebaSi isaa, rom ucodveli, metsac getyviT, sufTa kaci xarT. iqneb, SemiZlia, dagexmaroT... mxedvelobaSi maqvs... zomervildi gaCumda. _ fuls gulisxmobT? _ vkiTxe me. _ fulsac, _ miTxra man, _ magram ZiriTadad Tqvens profesiul saqmianobas. _ SeiZleba, mogvianebiT marTlac momixdes TqvenTan saubari fulsa da profesiul saqmianobaze. sad aris mari? misi sunTqva momesma da siCumeSi pirvelad vigrZeni wveris saparsi siTxis, wiTeli Rvinis da rbili sigaris msubuqi suni. _ romSi gaemgzavrnen, _ mipasuxa man. _ Taflobis Tve aqvT, ara? _ vkiTxe xmaCaxleCilma. _ amas ase eZaxian, _ mipasuxa man. _ raTa kaxpoba srulyofili iyos, _ vTqvi me. yurmili ise davde, arc madloba miTqvams da arc davmSvido128

bebivar. xaliCas davxede, sigaretis cecxliT amomwvari patara wertilebi jer kidev bolavda, magram ise viyavi daRlili, rom fexis dadgma da Caqroba damezara. mcioda, muxli mtkioda. etyoba, didi xani davyavi abazanaSi. romSi CemTan erTad gamgzavreba maris arasodes mousurvebia. roca SevTavaze, gawiTlda da miTxra: italiaSi wamogyvebi, magram romSi arao. vkiTxe, ratom-meTqi? kiTxvaze kiTxviTve mipasuxa, nuTu marTla ar gesmiso? ara-meTqi. aRaraferi upasuxia. marisTan erTad siamovnebiT gavemgzavrebodi romSi papis sanaxavad. me mgoni, papis molodinSi ramdenime saaTsac ki vidgebodi wminda petres moedanze, xolo roca fanjaraSi gamoCndeboda, taSs davukravdi da evviva-s SevZaxebdi. Cemi survilebi maris gavuziare, kinaRam gacofda da miTxra, ukuRmarTobad mimaCnia SenisTana agnostikosi paps aRtacebuli SeZaxilebiT miesalmoso. mari marTlac eWvianobda. aseTi ram xSirad SemimCnevia kaTolikeebisaTvis: isini ZunwebiviT icaven TavianT ganZeulobas _ salocavebs, paps. garda amisa, adamianTa im jgufebs Soris, romlebsac vicnob, kaTolikeebs yvelaze qedmaRlurad uWiravT Tavi, didi warmodgena aqvT TavianTi eklesiis rogorc Zlier, aseve sust mxareebze da, amave dros, yoveli cotad Tu bevrad inteligenti adamianisagan moelian, rom sul cota xanSi rjuls Seicvlis. iqneb, mari imitom ar momyveboda romSi, rom iq ufro mZafrad igrZnobda CemTan codvili cxovrebiT gamowveul sircxvils. zog rameSi gulubryvilo iyo da arc didi inteligentobiT gamoirCeoda. imiT ki, rom ciupfners wahyva romSi, didi simdable gamoiCina. audiencias, cxadia, miiReben da sawyal paps, romelic maris mimarTavs sityvebiT `asulo Cemo~, xolo ciupfners _ `sayvarelo Svilo Cemo~, ar ecodineba, rom mis win uzneo da moRalate wyvilia muxlmoyrili. iqneb, ciupfners imitomac gahyva romSi, rom Cems Tavs iq araferi moagonebs. Cven vyofilvarT neapolSi, veneciaSi, florenciaSi, parizSi, londonSi da uamrav germanul qalaqSi. romSi ki marTlac araviTari mogoneba ar Seawuxebs. iq `kaTolikuri haeric~ sakmaod eqneba. gadavwyvite zomervildisaTvis kidev erTxel damereka
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da meTqva, rom mis yvelaze did siflided Cemi monogamuri bunebis abuCad agdeba mimaCnia, magram amgvari uxamsoba TiTqmis yvela ganaTlebul kaTolikes axasiaTebs. Cveulebriv, isini qristianuli dogmebis sangarSi imalebian, iqidan esvrian yvelas dogmebisagan Sekowiwebul principebs. roca maT `uryev WeSmaritebas~ seriozulad daupirispirdebi, iRimebian da Tavis gasamarTleblad `adamianis bunebas~ imowmeben, xolo Tu dasWirdaT, saxeze ise moirgeben damcinav Rimils, TiTqos inaxules papi, romelmac maT ucodvelobis pawawina natexi gamoatana Tan. erTi sityviT, roca seriozulad udgebi im aRmaSfoTebel WeSmaritebebs, romlebiTac gulgrilad gimaspinZldebian kaTedrebidan, an `protestanti~ xar, anda iumoris grZnobas moklebuli adamiani. roca seriozulad msjelob maTTan qorwinebaze, isini maSinve henri merves iSvelieben _ am qvemexebidan ager ukve sami saukunea isvrian, raTa gvamcnon, Tu ra Zlieria maTi eklesia, xolo roca surT dagvanaxvon, ra mowyale da didi gulis patronia, maSin bezevicze anekdotebs hyvebian da episkoposTa nakvesebs igoneben, isic mxolod `saqmeSi CaxedulTa~ wreSi. aseTebad `ganaTlebulebi~ da `inteligentebi~ miaCniaT _ am SemTxvevaSi araviTari mniSvneloba ara aqvs, memarcxeneobas iCemeben Tu memarjveneobas. am ramdenime xnis winaT zomervilds vTxove, kaTedridan moeyola prelatisa da bezevicis ambavi. igi gacofda. roca saqme qalisa da kacis urTierTobas exeba, eklesiis kaTedras isini TavianTi mZime qvemexis gasasrolad iyeneben. henri merve _ samefos viZlevi qorwinebaSi! ufleba! kanoni! dogma! sxvadasxva mizezis gamo guli mereoda. fizikurad imitom, rom boxumSi waxemsebis Semdeg pirSi, koniakis meti, araferi Camsvlia, mxolod sigarets veweodi, sulierad ki imitom, rom warmovidgine, rogor uyurebda ciupfneri maris Cacmas romis sastumroSi. albaT, mis sacvlebSic iqeqeba. am sworad Tmagayofil, inteligent, samarTlian da ganaTlebul kaTolikeebs gulkeTili qalebi sWirdebaT. mari ar iyo ciupfneris Sesaferisi. ciupfneri unaklod icvamda, sakmaod
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modurad, raTa Zvelmoduroba ar daewamebinaT, magram arc zedmiwevniT modurad, frantad rom ar gamoCeniliyo. yovel diliT saguldagulod civi wyliT ibanda tans da ise gamalebiT ixexavda kbilebs, TiTqos rekordis damyarebas apirebso. aseTi kacisaTvis mari naklebad inteligenturi qali iyo. dilaobiT zedmet gulmodginebasac ki iCenda morTvamokazmvaSi. ciupfnerisTana tipi, papTan audienciaze Seyvanis win, swrafad gadaisvams cxvirsaxocs fexsacmelze. mecodeboda papic, romlis winaSec isini muxls moiyrian. papi guliT gaixarebs da keTilad gauRimebs am lamaz, simpaTiur, kaTolike germanel wyvils. arada, kidev erTxel motyuvdeba _ aba, ras warmoidgens, rom locva-kurTxeviT Seegeba or mruSs. saabazanoSi davbrundi, tani kargad gavimSrale, isev Cavicvi, Semdeg samzareuloSi gavedi da wyali asaduReblad davdgi. monikas araferi daviwyebia. asanTi gazis quraze ido, dafquli yava mWidrod Tavdaxurul qilaSi eyara, iqve ido filtris qaRaldi, kvercxebi da lori, xolo bostneulis konservebi macivarSi Seewyo. samzareuloSi fusfusi mxolod maSin mixaria, roca amiT Tavs varideb mozrdilTa ybedobis garkveul formebs. roca zomervildi `erosze~ iwyebs laparaks, bloTerTi Tavis ka... ka... kanclers amoRerRavs, xolo fredeboili ostaturad kompilebul moxsenebas kiTxulobs koktoze, maSin, cxadia, samzareuloSi gasvla, tubebidan maionezis gamoWyleta, zeTisxilis Suaze gaWra da puris naWrebze RviZlis Zexvis dadeba mirCevnia. magram roca marto var da minda, samzareuloSi CemTvis rame movimzado, usaSvelod vibnevi. martoobisagan xelidan araferi gamomdis. Tu aucilebelia konservis qilis gaxsna an tafaze kvercxebis daxla, Rrma melanqolia mipyrobs. ucolo ar meTqmis. roca mari avad iyo an samsaxurSi midioda _ erTxans kiolnSi qaRaldis maRaziaSi msaxurobda gamyidvelad _ samzareuloSi fusfusi sulac ar miZneldeboda, xolo roca maris muceli pirvelad moeSala, Cveni diasaxlisis kinodan dabrunebamde loginis TeTreulic ki gavrecxe.
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lobios konservis qila, rogorc iqna, gavxseni, Tanac ise, rom xeli ar gamikawravs, aduRebuli wyali filtrze davasxi da Tan im saxlze vfiqrobdi, ciupfnerma rom aiSena am oriode wlis winaT. erTxel mec viyavi masTan stumrad. 14 cxadad vxedavdi, rogor brundeba mari Sebindebisas im saxlSi. mokled gadakreWili gazonebi mTvaris Suqze TiTqmis lurji Cans. garaJis gverdiT mebaRes moWrili totebi dauxvavebia. kurdRliscocxasa da kunelis buCqebs Soris gasatanad gamzadebuli nagvis yuTi dgas. paraskevi saRamoa. maris ukve ecodineba, risi suni trialebs samzareuloSi _ Tevzis. isic ecodineba, visi baraTebi daxvdeba. ciupfneris baraTi televizorze devs: `aucileblad unda vnaxo f... gkocni. heriberTi~. meore, moaxlisa _ macivarze: `wavedi kinoSi, aTze davbrundebi. greTe (luize, brigiT)~. mari garaJis kars aRebs da sinaTles rTavs. TeTrad SeRebil kedelze motorolerisa da gadagdebuli sakeravi manqanis Crdili Cans. boqsSi gaCerebuli mersedesi imaze metyvelebs, rom ciupfneri fexiT wavida. `saWiroa isunTqo sufTa haeri, xandaxan mainc unda isunTqo sufTa haeri, haeri~. manqanas talaxian saburavebsa da frTebze etyoba, rom ciupfneri xSirad miemgzavreba eifelze, sadac, naSuadRevs, axalgazrda kaTolikeTa kavSiris sxdomaze moxsenebebs kiTxulobs (vidgeT mxardamxar, vibrZoloT erTad, vitanjoT erTad). mari zeda sarTulisaken iyureba, magram sabavSvo oTaxSic bnela. mezobel saxlebs erTmaneTisagan manqanis saburavebis kvali da yvavilnaris farTo kvlebi yofs. saxlebidan gamokrTis televizorebis mimqrali anarekli. aseT dros meuRlisa da mamis Sin dabruneba xelis SemSlel movlenad miaCniaT, xelis SemSlelad miiCneven uZRebi Svilis Sin dabrunebasac da xbos ki ara, variasac ar dauklavdnen. saswrafod macivarze miuTiTebdnen, sadac RviZlis Zexvis mcire narCenebi devs. SabaTs, naSuadRevs, es saxlebi erTmaneTs uZmobildebian. badmintonis burTebi aqeT-iqiT cviva, katis knutebi da le132

kvebi mezoblis ezoebSi iparebian. badmintonis burTebs ukanve isvrian, katis knutebs da lekvebs ki WiSkridan an sxltis xvrelidan awvdian patronebs: `ra mSvenieri knutia~ an `ra sayvareli lekvia~. xmaze aravis etyoba gaRizianeba, aravin exeba pirovnebas. gaRizianeba mxolod zogjer arRvevs Tanazomier mruds da mezoblobis mowmendil caze qongurebs jRabnis. da es mudam xdeba sruliad umniSvnelo, da ara _ namdvili, mizezebis gamo: sadRac wkrialiT tydeba lambaqi, nasroli burTi yvavilebs Telavs, bavSvis xeli gakrialebul manqanas kenWebs esvris, viRac SlangiT baRis morwyvis dros mezoblis axalgarecxil da gauToebul sarecxze aSxefebs wyals _ ai, swored maSin gaereva xolme xmebSi gamyinavi bgerebi. arada, igive xmebi sicruis, mruSobis, muclis moSlis dros viTomc araferiao, ise JReren: _ ah, Sen zemgrZnobiare yurebi gaqvs, dalie rame damamSvidebeli. araferi ar dalio, mari. mari saxlis kars aRebs. saxlSi siCumea gamefebuli da sasiamovnod Tbila. zemoT patara marihens sZinavs. dro swrafad garbis. qorwili bonSi, Taflobis Tve romSi, fexmZimoba, mSobiaroba da, ai, ukve bavSvis wablisferi kululebi TovliviT qaTqaTa baliSzea dafenili. gaxsovs, rogor dagvaTvalierebina sakuTari saxli? ra xalisianad gveubneboda: am saxlSi Tormeti bavSvi daetevao. axla ki, roca erTad sauzmobT, gamomcdelad gakvirdeba da tuCebze uTqmeli kiTxva dasTamaSebs: `aba, rao?~, xolo misi primitiuli, rwmeniTa da partiiT gaerTianebuli megobrebi mesame Wiqa koniakis dalevis Semdeg amboben: `adam rizes mixedviT, erTs Tormetamde TerTmeti aklia~. qalaqSi miTqma-moTqmaa. Sen isev kinoSi yofilxar. gareT mziani, gakaSkaSebuli dRea, kinoSi ram Segiyvana. isev kino, kidev da kidev kino. wina saRamo gaatare bloTertis saxlSi mowyobil `wris~ sxdomaze da ka... ka... kas meti araferi mogismenia, magram amjerad sityva `ncleriT~ ki ar daabolova, aramed `ToloniT~. es sityva Sens yurSi ucxo sxeuliviT dagoravs da xan saTamaSo burTula ggonia, xanac Cirqovani muwuki. bloTerts yvelgan
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Tan daaqvs raRac gaigeris mTvlelis magvari, riTac `kaTolons~ agnebs: `am kacs aqvs, imas _ ara, am qals aqvs, imas _ ara~. es akaciis foTlebiT marCielobas hgavs _ `vuyvarvar, ar vuyvarvar, vuyvarvar~. kaTolons eZeben fexburTis gundebSi, partiis wevrebSi, mTavrobasa da opoziciaSi, `kaTolonis~ Semcvelobas iseve eZeben da iseve ver pouloben, rogorc rasobriv niSnebs _ Crdilouri cxviri, dasavluri piri. Tumca erTi kaci yelamdea savse am didad sasurveli, sanTliT saZebneli `kaToloniT~. es TviT bloTerti gaxlavT. mari, moeride mis Tvalebs _ maTSi dagvianebuli avxorcoba da meeqvse cnebis seminaristuli gageba gamosWvivis, xolo roca garkveuli saxis codvebze laparakobs da laTinur sityvebs in sexto-s da de sexto1-s warmoTqvams, es, cxadia, zustad iseve JRers, rogorc seqsi. rac Seexeba mis sayvarel Svilebs, _ ufrosi, huberTi, Tvrameti wlisaa, margareTi _ Cvidmetis, _ maT ufleba aqvT cota xans kidev darCnen ufrosebTan da sasargeblo saubari moisminon `kaTolonze~, wodebriv saxelmwifoze, sikvdiliT dasjaze, ris xsenebazec frau bloTerts Tvalebi ucnaurad gaubrwyindeba xolme, gaRizianebul xmas ki ise uwevs, rom, grZnobamoreuls, sicili da tirili erTad eZaleba. mari, Sen cdilobdi nugeSi fredeboilis daxavsebul memarcxenul cinizmSi gepova, magram amaod. aseve amao aRmoCnda Seni cda, aRSfoTebuliyavi bloTertis memarjvenuli cinizmiT. arsebobs mSvenieri sityva `arara~. ifiqre araraze, nu fiqrob kanclerze da kaTolonze, ifiqre klounze, romelic abazanaSi tiris da fostlebze yava esxmeba. 15 xmauri mecno, magram ar vicodi, rogor movqceuliyavi. amgvari bgerebi xSirad momismenia, magram arasodes gamovxmaurebivar. roca Cvens saxlSi zars rekavdnen, kars moaxleebi aRebdnen. marTalia, derkumis duqanSi xSirad mesmoda zaris rekva, magram karis gasaRebad arasodes wamovmdgarvar fexze.
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in sexto, de sexto (laT.) _ meeqvseSi, meeqvsedan.

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kiolnSi me da mari pansionatSi vcxovrobdiT, xolo sastumroebSi mxolod telefonis rekva ismis. cxadad mesmoda, rom zari rekavda, magram ver aRviqvamdi, raRacnairi ucxo meCveneboda. am binaSi mxolod orjer darekes: erTxel, roca biWma rZe amomirbenina da meored, roca ciupfnerma maris Cais vardebi gamougzavna. vardebi rom moitanes, loginSi viweqi. mari CemTan Semovida, vardebi maCvena da aRtacebulma cxviri TaigulSi Cargo. saCoTiro viTareba Seiqna, megona, yvavilebi me gamomigzavnes. zogjer Cemi Tayvanismcemeli qalebi sastumroSi yvavilebs migzavnidnen. _ ra mSvenieri vardebia, Seni iyos, _ vuTxari maris. marim Semomxeda da miTxra: _ ras hqvia Cemi iyos, Taiguli me gamomigzavnes. gavwiTldi. Tavi uxerxulad vigrZeni da gamaxsenda, rom marisaTvis arasdros gamigzavnia yvavilebi. marTalia, yvavilebs scenaze rom mawvdidnen, mTlianad misTvis mimqonda, magram yidviT arasodes miyidia. xSirad Cemi gadasaxdeli iyo im yvavilebis fuli, scenaze rom momarTmevdnen xolme. _ vin gamogigzavna yvavilebi? _ vkiTxe me. _ ciupfnerma, _ mipasuxa man. _ daswyevlos eSmakma, ras niSnavs es? _ wamoviZaxe me da gamaxsenda, rogor modiodnen quCaSi xelixelCakidebulni. mari gawiTlda da miTxra: _ ki magram, ratom ar unda gamoegzavna? _ kiTxva sxvanairad unda dagesva, _ vuTxari me, _ ratom unda gamoegzavna? _ Cven ukve didi xania vicnobT erTmaneTs, _ mipasuxa man, _ iqneb, Cemi Tayvanismcemelia. _ keTili, _ vupasuxe me, _ iyos Seni Tayvanismcemeli, magram amdeni Zvirfasi yvavilis gamogzavna Tavxedoba da uzrdelobaa. marim Tavi Seuracxyofilad igrZno da oTaxidan gavida. roca rZis damtarebelma biWma dareka, saerTo oTaxSi visxediT. mari gavida, biWs kari gauRo da fuli gadauxada. am
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binaSi mxolod erTi kaci gvestumra _ leo. es moxda manamde, sanam rjuls Seicvlida. magram leos ar daurekavs, marisTan erTad amovida zeviT. zari ucnaurad rekavda _ moridebuladac da jiutadac. `monika xom ar aris~, _ gavifiqre SeSinebulma, _ `iqneb zomervildma gamogzavna raime sababiT~. CemSi imwamsve gaiRviZa nibelungebis kompleqsma. erTianad dasvelebuli fostlebiT winkarSi gavvardi, magram verafriT vipove Rilaki, romelzec TiTi unda dameWira. sanam Rilaks veZebdi, gamaxsenda, rom monikas Cemi binis gasaRebi aqvs. rogorc iqna, Rilaki vipove, TiTi davaWire da qvevidan fanjris minaze mimjdari futkris zuzunis magvari bgerebi momesma. derefanSi gasuli, liftis gverdiT gavCerdi. jer ainTo wiTeli naTura `dakavebulia~, Semdeg `erTiani~, `oriani~. ganerviulebuli, manamde mivCerebodi cifrebs, sanam ar SevamCnie, rom Cem gverdiT viRac dgas. SeSinebuli, uecrad movtrialdi da davinaxe qera, zomierad tanwyobili, saTno da Ria nacrisferTvalebiani, lamazi qali. mxolod es iyo, qudi Cemi gemovnebisaTvis metismetad wiTeli momeCvena. me qals gavuRime, manac gamiRima da miTxra: _ Tqven albaT batoni Sniri brZandebiT, me ki Tqveni mezobeli gaxlavarT, gvarad grebseli. mixaria, erTxel mainc rom gixileT. _ mec mixaria, _ vupasuxe me da marTlac mixaroda. miuxedavad metismeti wiTeli qudisa, frau grebseli mSvenieri Sesaxedavi qali iyo. iRliaSi gazeTi `bonis xma~ hqonda amoCrili. man Cemi mzera SeniSna, gawiTlda da miTxra: _ nu miaqcevT yuradRebas. _ mag ZaRls silas gavawnav, _ vuTxari me. _ rom icodeT, ra sulmdabali mliqvnelia... garda amisa, erTi boTli aryis fuli damcancla... qals gaecina. _ me da Cems qmars didad gagvaxarebs Cveni mezoblis axlos gacnoba. didxans darCebiT bonSi? _ mkiTxa man. _ diax, _ vupasuxe me, _ Tu nebas momcemT, erTxel rogorme gestumrebiT. Tqvens binaSic yvelaferi Jangisferia?
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_ ra Tqma unda, Jangisferi xom mexuTe sarTulis ganmasxvavebeli niSania. lifti mcire xans mesame sarTulze SeCerda, Semdeg wiTlad ainTo `oTxiani~, mere `xuTiani~ da, roca kari gaiRo, gaocebulma erTi nabijiT ukan davixie. liftidan mamaCemi gamovida, frau grebsels xeli SeaSvela, liftSi SeuSva da mxolod amis Semdeg Semobrunda Cemken. _ RmerTo Cemo, mama, _ wamoviZaxe. arasodes damiZaxia misTvis mama, yovelTvis `mamis~ veZaxdi. _ hans, _ miTxra man da rogorRac uxerxulad scada xeli moexvia CemTvis. Semdeg binaSe SevuZexi, palto da qudi CamovarTvi, saerTo oTaxis kari gavaRe da taxtze mivuTiTe. mama darbaislurad dajda. oriveni Secbunebulebi viyaviT. Secbuneba, albaT, aucilebeli pirobaa imisaTvis, rom mSoblebma da Svilebma erTmaneTTan saubari SeZlon. etyoba, Cemi misalmeba `mama~ Zalze paTetikurad JRerda da aman kidev ufro gaamZafra Cveni isedac gardauvali Secbuneba. mamam, romelic erT-erT Jangisfer savarZelSi ijda, Tavi gadaaqn-gadmoaqnia: aTvalierebda Cems erTianad dasvelebul fostlebs, metismetad grZel sabanao xalaTs, romelic ratomRac cecxliviT wiTeli iyo. mamaCemi simaRliT ar gamoirCeva, magram imdenad saxieri, moxdenili da eleganturia, rom telemuSakebi erTmaneTs xelidan glejen, roca televiziaSi ekonomikis sakiTxebze diskusia imarTeba. ekranidan pirdapir sikeTesa da gonivrulobas afrqvevs, amitom gasakviri ar aris, rom televarskvlavis saxeli ufro advilad moipova, vidre amas mura naxSiris mwarmoebeli Sniri SeZlebda. sZags simxecis yovelgvari gamovlena. roca uyureb, varaudob, rom amgvari garegnobis kaci sigaras unda eweodes, msxvils ki ara, wvril, msubuq sigaras. magram is ambavi, rom samocdaaT wels mitanebuli kapitalisti sigarets eweva, saocrad uSualo da progresuli adamianis iers aniWebs. kargad mesmis, ratom iwveven yvela im diskusiaSi monawileobis misaRebad, sadac fulzea laparaki. etyoba, igi marto keTili kacis STabeWdilebas ki ar tovebs, aramed marTlac keTilia.
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mamaCems sigareti mivawode da, roca misken daxrili cecxls vukidebdi, miTxra: _ klounebze bevri araferi vici, magram cota ram mainc gamigia. is, rom isini yavaSi banaoben, CemTvis axali ambavia. zogjer mama Zalze enamoswrebulia. _ yavaSi ar vbanaob, mamaCemo, _ vuTxari me, _ mindoda damesxa, magram ver movaxerxe. am winadadebaSi mainc unda meTqva `mami~, magram gvian movisazre. _ rames xom ar dalev? _ vkiTxe me. man gaiRima, undoblad Semomxeda da mkiTxa: _ gaqvs rame saxlSi? samzareuloSi gavedi. macivarSi koniaki, ramdenime boTli mineraluri wyali, limonaTi da erTi boTli wiTeli Rvino aRmoCnda. TiTo boTli yvelaferi aviRe, saerTo oTaxSi gavitane da mamaCemis win, magidaze Cavamwkrive. man jibidan saTvale amoiRo da etiketi SeaTvaliera. Tavi gadaaqnia da yvelaze uwin koniakis boTli gadado gverdze. vicodi, koniaki rom uyvarda da ganawyenebulma vuTxari: _ me mgoni, kargi markaa. _ kargi markis kia, magram saukeTeso koniakic ki ufasurdeba, roca macivarSi gayinav. _ o, RmerTo Cemo, _ wamoviZaxe me, _ nuTu koniakis macivarSi Sedgma ar SeiZleba? man ise Semomxeda saTvalis zemodan, TiTqos es-es aris cxovelTmavlobaSi mamxiles. mamaCemi Taviseburad esTetic iyo. diliT, sauzmis dros sam-oTxjer daabrunebda samzareuloSi tostebs, manamde, sanam ana ise ar dabrawavda, rogorc saWiroa. es Cumi brZola Cvens saxlSi yovel diliT Tavidan iwyeboda, radgan puris dabrawva anas `anglosaqsur sisuleled~ miaCnda. _ koniakis macivarSi Sedgma... _ Tqva mamaCemma zizRiT, _ marTla ar icodi Tu TvalTmaqcob. Sensas kaci ras gaigebs. _ marTla ar vicodi, _ vupasuxe me. man gamomcdeli TvaliT Semomxeda da ise gamiRima, TiTqos daijera.
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_ me ki Sens aRzrdaze uamravi fuli davxarje, _ miTxra man. mamam am sityvebSi ironia Caaqsova, aqaoda, samocdaaT wels mitanebuli mama Tavis davaJkacebul Svils elaparakeboda, magram ironia ar gamouvida, sityva `fulma~ gaToSa. man Tavis qneviT limonaTzec uari Tqva da wiTel Rvinozec. _ amgvar viTarebaSi yvelaze saimedo sasmeli mineraluri wyalia. servantidan ori Wiqa gamoviRe da mineraluri wyliT savse boTli gavxseni. amjerad marcxi ar momsvlia. mama Tvals madevnebda da gulkeTilad miqnevda Tavs. _ xom ar gexamuSeba, sabanao xalaTSi rom davrCe? _ vkiTxe me. _ diax, mexamuSeba, _ miTxra man. _ wesierad Caicvi, geTayva. Seni morTuloba da yavis suni situacias sasacilos xdis, rac sruliad uadgiloa, radgan seriozulad unda mogelaparako. garda amisa, _ mapatie, ase gulaxdilad rom geubnebi, _ mZags yvela juris feTxumi. imedia, Sen es gaxsovs. _ sifeTxume aq arafer SuaSia, _ vupasuxe me, _ es mxolod ganmuxtvis erTgvari formaa. _ ar vici, ramdenjer iyavi Sens sicocxleSi damjere Svili, axlac ar xar valdebuli, damijero. me mxolod imas gTxov, rom pativi damdo. gavocdi. adre mamaCemi morcxvi da sityvaZunwi kaci iyo. etyoba, `momxibvleli damajereblobiT~ msjeloba da kamaTi telestudiaSi iswavla. me metismetad daRlili viyavi imisaTvis, rom am `momxibvlelobisaTvis~ winaaRmdegoba gamewia. saabazanoSi gasulma, yaviT dasvelebuli windebi gaviZvre, perangi, Sarvali da pijaki Cavicvi, Semdeg fexSiSveli samzareuloSi Sevvardi, gacxelebuli TeTri lobio TefSze davaxvave, Toxlod moxarSuli kvercxebi pirdapir lobioSi Cavaxale, naWuWebidan kvercxis narCenebi kovziT amovfxike, puris naWeri da kovzi Tan gaviyole da saerTo oTaxSi gavedi. mamaCems saxeze gamoexata gaocebisa da zizRis ostaturi narevi. _ mapatie, _ vuTxari me, _ dilis cxra saaTidan pirSi
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araferi Camidvia. me mgoni, ar gWirdeba, Sens fexebTan gulwasuli rom gaviSxlarTo. mamam naZaladevad gaicina, Tavi gaaqnia da Tqva: _ ho, kargi, magram icode, marto cilovani nivTierebebi janmrTelobisaTvis mavnebelia. _ Semdeg vaSls davayoleb, _ vuTxari me. lobio da kvercxi erTmaneTSi avTqvife, puri CavkbiCe da erTi kovzi salafavi pirSi Cavide; kerZi gemrieli momeCvena. _ cotaodeni pomidvris wveni mainc dagesxa zed, _ miTxra mamaCemma. _ Cems saxlSi aseTi ram ar moipoveba, _ vupasuxe me. metismetad xarbad vWamdi da, etyoba, mamaCems ar siamovnebda piris wklapuni _ vfqvlefdi da, aba, ra iqneboda. igi cdilobda zizRi daemala, magram aSkarad ar gamosdioda. bolos fexze wamovdeqi, samzareuloSi gavedi da macivarTan gaCerebulma TefSi movasufTave. vWamdi da Tan macivris zemoT dakidebul sarkeSi vicqirebodi. ramdenime kviraa, rac yvelaze aucilebel varjiSzec ki aviRe xeli _ saxis kunTebis varjiSze. klouni, romlis ostatobis mTeli efeqti saxis uZraobazea damyarebuli, unda ecados, rom Zalian moZravi saxe hqondes. pirvel xanebSi, varjiSis dawyebamde Cems Tavs sarkeSi enas vuyofdi, raTa jer dameaxloebina sakuTari Tavi, sanam isev SevZlebdi, CemTvisve ucxo gavmxdariyavi. Semdeg moveSvi amas da Cems Tavs yoveldRe mTeli naxevari saaTi ise vaCerdebodi saxeSi, rom araviTar fands ar mivmarTavdi. bolos mTlianad veTiSebodi Cemsave mes da, radgan ar SemeZlo narcisiviT davmtkbariyavi sakuTari Tavis cqeriT, zogjer meCveneboda, rom Wkuaze viSlebodi. am dros sruliad maviwydeboda, rom is, visac sarkeSi vumzerdi, me var. roca varjiSs davamTavrebdi, sarkes kedlisaken Sevabrunebdi da, Tu im dRes saabazanoSi an sapirfareSoSi SemTxveviT sarkeSi Cavixedavdi, SiSi mipyrobda: sarkidan ucxo kaci mimzerda da aRar vicodi, es grZelcxvira, gafiTrebuli moCveneba seriozuli iyo Tu sasacilo; maSinve Tavqudmoglejili gavrbodi marisTan, raTa mis TvalebSi Cemi saxe damenaxa. magram mas Semdeg, rac marim
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mimatova, saxis kunTebs veRar vavarjiSeb, meSinia, ar gavgiJde. roca varjiSs vamTavrebdi, saxe sul axlos mimqonda marisTan da mis TvalebSi vxedavdi pawawina, odnav damaxinjebul, magram nacnob saxes. es me viyavi, is saxe iyo, romlisac sarkeSi meSinoda. rogor amexsna conererisaTvis, rom maris gareSe sarkis win varjiSi aRar SemeZlo. axla, roca Cems Tavs Wamis dros vakvirdebodi, SiSi ki ara, mWmunvareba mipyrobda. cxadad vxedavdi kovzs, lobios, romelSic kvercxis guli da cila iyo adRvebili, puris naWers, xelSi rom TandaTan meleoda. sarke iseT gulis amaCuyebel realobas ireklavda, rogoricaa mosufTavebuli TefSi, dapataravebuli puris naWeri da odnav moTxupnili piri. piri pijakis saxeloTi moviwminde. varjiSs ar Sevdgomivar, radgan irgvliv aravin meguleboda iseTi, sarkisagan rom mixsnida. danayrebulma, nela gavwie saerTo oTaxisaken. _ ase Cqara morCi? _ miTxra mamaCemma, _ metismetad Cqara Wam. axla mainc dajeqi. saWmels arafers daayoleb? _ ara, _ vupasuxe me, _ mindoda yava momexarSa, magram araferi gamomivida. _ xom ar mogimzado? _ mkiTxa man. _ SegiZlia? _ Cemze amboben, karg yavas xarSavso. _ ar Rirs, _ vuTxari me, _ cota mineralur wyals davayoleb, ra mniSvneloba aqvs amas. _ yavis moxarSva mexaliseba, _ miTxra man. _ ara, gmadlob, _ vuTxari me, _ samzareuloSi ar Seixedeba: iatakze yavis gube dgas, konservis carieli qila agdia da kvercxis naWuWebi yria. _ rogorc gnebavs, _ miTxra man. iseTi Seuracxyofili Canda, gagecineboda. Semdeg mineraluri wyali damisxa da portsigari gamomiwoda. sigareti gamovarTvi. man cecxli momikida da erTad gavaboleT. mama Semecoda. TefSze daxvavebuli lobioTi, albaT, mTlad avubnie Tavgza. cxadia, igi fiqrobda, CemTan is daxvdeboda, rasac TviTon bohemas eZaxda _ sagangebo areul-dareuloba, Wersa da kedlebze yovelgvari mo141

dernistuli maimunoba, magram Cems binaSi araviTari stili ar igrZnoboda, SemTxveviT naSovni nivTebiT iyo gawyobili, TiTqmis mdabiurad gamoiyureboda da vamCnevdi, rom mas es Trgunavda. servanti avejis maRaziis katalogis meSveobiT viyideT, kedlebze reproduqciebi davkideT, maT Soris, mxolod oria abstraqtuli. yvelaze metad momwons komodis zemoT dakidebuli monika zilvsis ori akvareli. `rainis landSafti III~ da `rainis landSafti IV~, romlebic TeTrad Seferadebul muqnacrisfer tonebSia Sesrulebuli. ramdenime lamazi nivTi _ skamebi, vazebi da kuTxeSi mdgari gorgolaWebiani patara magida _ marim iyida. mamaCemi im adamianTa ricxvs ekuTvnoda, romelTac garkveuli atmosfero sWirdebaT, Cveni binis atmosferom ki gaaRiziana, daamunja. _ dedam giTxra, rom aqa var? _ vkiTxe bolos, radgan meore sigaretis mokidebamde sityva arc erTs ar dagvcdenia. _ ki, _ mipasuxa man, _ nuTu ar SegiZlia moeSva dedaSens da ise daelaparako, rom kbili ar gahkra. _ mas rom sakomiteto xmiT ar epasuxa, yvelaferi sxvanairad warimarTeboda. _ ra gaqvs am komitetis sawinaaRmdego? _ mkiTxa man mSvidad. _ araferi, _ vupasuxe me. _ misasalmebelic kia, rasobriv winaaRmdegobaTa morigeba rom surT, magram me rasebze sxvanairi warmodgena maqvs, vidre komitets. magaliTad, zangebi modis ukanaskneli yiJinia... minda dedaCems vurCio, erTi Cemi nacnobi zangi Seifaros, saSobao samkaulad gamoadgeba. amave dros, Tu davfiqrdebiT, zangTa asobiT rasa arsebobs. amitom komiteti usaqmod arasodes darCeba. garda amisa, amqveynad boSebic cxovroben. dedas erTxel mainc unda SeepatiJebina zogierTi maTgani Caize pirdapir quCidan. ase rom, jer kidev bevri saqmea gasakeTebeli. _ me aq amaze salaparakod ar movsulvar, _ Tqva mamam. gavCumdi. man Semomxeda da wynarad miTxra: _ SenTan fulze salaparakod movedi. xma ar amomiRia.
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_ me mgoni, sakmaod giWirs. mipasuxe rame. _ `giWirs~ mSvenieri sityvaa. me, albaT, mTel weliwads ver SevZleb scenaze gamosvlas. Sexede amas! Sarvlis toti aviwie, gasivebuli muxli vaCvene, Semdeg toti gaviswore da marjvena xelis saCvenebeli TiTi mkerdis marjvena mxares davide. _ da ai, aqac, _ vuTxari me. _ RmerTo Cemo, _ wamoiZaxa man, _ guli? _ diax, _ vupasuxe me, _ guli. _ dromerTs davurekav, vTxov, migiRos. gulis ukeTesi specialisti Cven ara gvyavs. _ ver gamige, _ vuTxari me, _ dromerTis konsultacia ar mWirdeba. _ aki Tqvi, gulio. _ albaT, unda meTqva suli, xasiaTi, guneba, _ vupasuxe me, _ magram guli ufro Sesaferisi momeCvena. _ ai, Turme ra yofila, _ miTxra man civad, _ Sen `is ambavi~ gaqvs mxedvelobaSi? `is ambavi~, albaT, zomervildma uambo keTilSobilTa kavSirSi skatis TamaSis dros, vidre kurdRlis gul-RviZlis pilpilian ragus miirTmevdnen da luds svamdnen, roca viRacas xelSi SerCa gulis koziri usamianod. mama wamodga da bolTis cemas mohyva, Semdeg savarZlis ukan gaCerda, sazurges daeyrdno da zemodan damxeda. _ cxadia, sulelurad JRers da maRalfardovan sityvebad mogeCveneba, magram ici, ra gaklia? _ miTxra man, _ is, rac mamakacs mamakacad xdis, garemosTan Seguebis unari. _ dRes me es erTxel ukve movismine, _ vupasuxe me. _ maSin mesamedac moismine. unda Seeguo garemos. _ Tavi damanebe, _ vupasuxe daRlilma. _ rogor ggonia, ra xasiaTze davdgebodi, roca leo momadga da gamomicxada, kaTolike unda gavxdeo. es ambavi CemTvis iseve mtkivneuli iyo, rogorc henrieTes sikvdili. rom eTqva, komunisti vxdebio, guli naklebad metkineboda. axalgazrda kaci rom ahyveba mcdar ocnebas socialur samarTlianobasa da msgavs raRacaze, amis warmodgena SemiZlia. magram es, _ igi
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savarZlis sazurges CaeWida da Tavi Zlier gadaaqnia, _ es ara, ara. etyoba, ar xumrobda, radgan erTianad gafiTrda da bevrad ufro xnieri gamoCnda, vidre sinamdvileSi iyo. _ dajeqi, mama, da erTi Wiqa koniaki dalie. igi dajda da TaviT koniakis boTlze maniSna. servantidan Wiqa gamoviRe da davusxi. koniaki ise dalia, rom arc madloba uTqvams da arc gagimarjoso. _ Sen es, albaT, ar gesmis, _ miTxra man. _ ara, _ vupasuxe me. _ maSinebs yvela axalgazrda kaci, visac aseTi ram swams, _ miTxra man. _ amitomac momxvda ase mwared gulSi, magram mainc Sevegue... Sevegue. ratom miyureb ase? _ SenTan bodiSi maqvs mosaxdeli, _ vuTxari me, _ roca televizoris ekranze gxedavdi, vfiqrobdi, didebuli msaxiobi iqneboda, klounisac ki scxia raRac-meTqi. man undoblad Semomxeda, cotaTi Seuracxyofilic ki momeCvena da amitom swrafad davZine: _ ara, mami, marTla sworupovari iyavi. mixaroda, rom kvlav vipove `mami~. _ ubralod, maT Tavs momaxvies es roli, _ miTxra man. _ Senzea zedgamoWrili, _ vuTxari me, _ didebulad TamaSob. _ me arasodes vTamaSob, _ miTxra man seriozulad, _ arasodes, ar mWirdeba TamaSi. _ ikiTxon Senma mtrebma, _ vuTxari me. _ mtrebi ar myavs, _ miTxra man aRSfoTebiT. _ miT uaresi Seni mtrebisaTvis, _ vuTxari me. kvlav undoblad Semomxeda, magram Semdeg gaecina da miTxra: _ me marTla ar vTvli maT mtrebad. _ kidev ufro cudad yofila saqme, vidre vfiqrobdi, _ vupasuxe me. _ gana imaT, visac mxolod fulze elaparakebi, ar ician, rom yvelaze mniSvnelovans malavT, an, iqneb, ekranze gamoCenamde winaswar uTanxmdebiT erTmaneTs? man koniaki daisxa da gakvirvebulma Semomxeda.
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_ mindoda SenTan momavalze melaparaka. _ erTi wamiT momiTmine, _ SevaCere me, _ ubralod mainteresebs, rogor axerxebT amas. yovelTvis asaxelebT procentebs _ xuTi, aTi, oci, ormocdaaTi procenti, magram arasodes ambobT, ra Tanxis procentebia es. man Wiqa aswia, koniaki dalia da Semomxeda. sakmaod briyvuli gamometyveleba hqonda. _ ariTmetikaSi didad ganswavluli ara var, _ ganvagrZe me, _ magram vici, rom naxevari pfenigis asi procenti naxevari pfenigia, xolo erTi miliardis xuTi procenti _ ormocdaaTi milioni... gesmis? _ RmerTo Cemo, _ miTxra man, _ nuTu Sen imdeni dro gaqvs, rom televizors uyureb? _ diax, _ vupasuxe me, _ im ambis Semdeg, rogorc Sen uwode, xSirad vuyureb televizors, didebulad macarielebs, mTlianad macarielebs... Tanac, roca sakuTar mamas sam weliwadSi erTxel xedav, gixaria, televizoris ekranze mainc rom dainaxe. am dros sadRac naxevrad bnel ludxanaSi vzivar da luds vwrupav... zogjer marTlac vamayob SeniT. ra marjved arideb Tavs imas, uecrad rom vinmem gkiTxos, ra Tanxidano... _ cdebi, _ miTxra man civad, _ me arafers varideb Tavs. _ gana mosawyeni ar aris, kacs rom sul ar hyavs mtrebi? igi wamodga da gabrazebiT Semomxeda. mec wamovdeqi. Cven-Cveni savarZlebis ukan gavCerdiT da xelebi sazurgeze davawyveT. me gamecina: _ ra gasakviria, _ vuTxari me, _ rom, rogorc klouns, pantomimis Tanamedrove formebi mainteresebs. erTxel, roca ludxanis ukana oTaxSi marto vijeqi, televizorma xma dakarga, didebuli ram vixile: l art pour lart1-is SeWra xelfasis politikasa da ekonomikaSi. samwuxaroa, rom arasodes ginaxavs Cemi nomeri `sameTvalyureo sabWos sxdoma~. _ ai, ra unda giTxra, _ daiwyo man, _ Sen Sesaxeb gene1

lart pour lart (fr.) _ xelovneba xelovnebisaTvis.

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holms velaparake. vTxove Seni ramdenime nomeri enaxa da CemTvis erTgvari recenzia warmoedgina. uecrad damamTqnara. uzrdeloba iyo, magram ra gaewyoboda. kargad mesmoda, rogori saCoTiro mdgomareoba Seiqmna. Rame cudad meZina, dRec mZime mqonda. magram roca sami wlis unaxav mamas pirvelad xvdebi da cxovrebaSi pirvelad elaparakebi seriozulad, mTqnareba veraferi Tavazianobaa. me Zalian vRelavdi, amave dros, saSinlad daRlili viyavi da vnanobdi, rom maincdamainc axla amityda mTqnareba. geneholmis gvarma dasaZinebeli wamaliviT imoqmeda Cemze. mamaCemisTana adamianebi fiqroben, rom yvelaferi saukeTeso amqveynad maTi wilxvedria: gulis saukeTeso eqimi msoflioSi _ dromerTi, federaciuli respublikis saukeTeso kritikosi _ geneholmi, saukeTeso mkeravi, saukeTeso Sampanuri, saukeTeso sastumro, saukeTeso mwerali... ra mosawyenia. Cemi mTqnareba krunCxvebSi gadaizarda, ybebs tkacani gahqonda. geneholmi homoseqsualisti iyo, magram es faqti arafers cvlida. misi gvari mainc mowyenilobas iwvevda CemSi. arian Semaqcevari homoseqsualistebic, magram me swored aseTebi mimaCnia mosawyen adamianebad, gansakuTrebiT maSin, roca isini eqscentrikulnic arian. geneholmi ki homoseqsualistic iyo da eqscentrikulic. igi dedaCemis TiTqmis yvela wveulebas eswreboda da mosaubres ise etmasneboda, rom Zalauneburad mis amonasunTqs sunTqavdi da icodi, ra Wama im dRes. oTxi wlis winaT, roca ukanasknelad Sevxvdi, kartofilis salaTis suni udioda da am sunis gamo misi moiisfro-wiTeli Jileti da Taflisferi mefistofeluri ulvaSebi eqstravaganturi aRar meCveneboda. geneholmi enamoswrebuli kaci iyo da, radgan es yvelam icoda, iZulebuli iyo mudam exumra. ase cxovreba damqancvelia. _ mapatie, _ vuTxari mamas, roca davrwmundi, rom mkrunCxveli mTqnareba momeSva, _ mainc ras ambobs geneholmi? mamaCemi Seuracxyofili iyo. ase emarTeba yovelTvis, roca misi TandaswrebiT zedmetis uflebas aZleven Tavs. Cemma mTqnarebam subieqturad ki ara, obieqturad atkina guli. Tavi ise gadaaqnia, rogorc maSin, roca lobios salafavi dainaxa.
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_ geneholmi Sens zrdas didi interesiT adevnebda Tvals, piradad Sendami ki Zalze keTiladaa ganwyobili. _ homoseqsualistebi arasodes kargaven imeds, _ vupasuxe me, _ jiuti xalxia. _ moeSvi magas, _ miTxra mamaCemma ukmexad, _ gixarodes, rom aseTi gavleniani da kompetenturi mfarveli gyavs. _ didad bednieri var, _ vTqvi me. _ magas imis sawinaaRmdegoc bevri ram aqvs, rac Sen aqamde gikeTebia. Tumca arlekinisaTvis saWiro niWi ar gaklia, saamisod mainc ar emetebi da fiqrobs, yvelafer pieroseuls unda moerido _ rogorc klouni arafrad vargixar. misi azriT, dauyovnebliv pantomimaze gadasvla Seni erTaderTi saSvelia. mismen? _ misi xma sul ufro da ufro mkveTrad JRerda. _ rogor ara, _ mivuge me, _ mesmis yoveli Seni sityva, yoveli Seni brZnuli da marTebuli sityva. yuradRebas nu miaqcev, Tvalebi rom maqvs daxuWuli. sanam igi geneholmis sityvebs imeorebda, Tvalebi daxuWuli mqonda. aman Cemze damamSvideblad imoqmeda da mixsna mamaCemis ukan, kedelTan dadgmuli komodis cqerisagan. sazizRari nivTi iyo da raRaciT skolas magonebda. muqyavisfrad SeRebil komods Savi saxelurebi da zeda waxnagTan yviTeli dekoratiuli Tamasa hqonda. komodi maris ojaxidan gvergo wilad. _ ganagrZe, _ vTxove wynarad, _ ilaparake. daRlilobisagan cocxal-mkvdari viyavi, mtkioda kuWi, Tavi da ise daZabuli videqi savarZlis ukan, rom muxli kidev ufro gamisivda. daxuWul quTuToebs miRma sakuTar saxes vxedavdi, swored iseTs, rogoric sarkidan miyurebda aTasobiT saaTis varjiSis dros _ sruliad umoZraos, TovliviT TeTri umariliT dafaruls. arc wamwamebi iZvrian, arc warbebi, mxolod Tvalebs vamoZraveb nela aqeT-iqiT SemkrTali bocveriviT da swored amiT vaRwev im did efeqts, rasac geneholmisTana kritikosebi `animaliuri melanqoliis gamoxatvis saocar unars~ uwodeben. axla mkvdari viyavi da aTasi saaTis varjiSi Cems saxeSi iyo gamoketili, radgan araviTari SesaZlebloba ar mqonda maris TvalebSi CavZiruliyavi da Tavi gadamerCina.
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_ ilaparake, _ vTxove kvlav. _ mirCia, erT-erT saukeTeso maswavlebels migabaro erTi an ori wliT, SeiZleba naxevari wliTac. geneholmis azriT, SenTvis aucilebelia erT rameze koncentrireba, swavla. TviTSegrZnebis iseT dones unda miaRwio, rom uSualoba dagibrundes... da varjiSi, varjiSi, varjiSi... mismen? madloba RmerTs, amjerad misi xma ufro rbilad JRerda. _ diax, _ vuTxari me. _ me mzad var, xeli gagimarTo. iseTi grZnoba mqonda, TiTqos muxli gazometriviT mrgvali da sqeli gamixda. savarZlis irgvliv xelebi ise movafaTure, rom Tvalebi ar gamixelia, savarZelSi Cavjeqi da magidaze dadebuli sigaretis kolofi brmasaviT xelis faTuriT movZebne. mamaCems sazareli yvirili aRmoxda. me ise kargad vbaZav brmas, rom marTlac hgoniaT, TiTqos moulodnelad davbrmavdi. Cemi sibrmave meve davijere da vifiqre, iqneb, marTlac brmad davrCe-meTqi. brma kacs ki ar ganvasaxierebdi, aramed kacs, romelic es wuTia dabrmavda. roca sigareti pirSi Cavide, vigrZeni mamas sanTeblis ali da isic, Tu rogor TrToda. _ Cemo biWo, _ miTxra SeSinebulma, _ avad xar? _ diax, _ vupasuxe wynarad, sigareti movqaCe da kvamli Rrmad CavisunTqe. _ sasikvdilod gadadebuli avadmyofi var, magram ara brma. mtkiva kuWi, Tavi, muxli, mWams Savi melanqolia, magram yvelaze cudi is aris, rom geneholmi marTalia daaxloebiT samocdaTxuTmeti procentiT. me isic ki vici, kidev ra giTxra. klaistze Camogigdo sityva, ara? _ marTalia, _ miTxra mamam. _ isic xom giTxra, jer suli unda davkargo, mTlianad davcarielde, raTa Semdeg kvlav movipovo igi. giTxra Tu ara? _ ki, miTxra, _ mipasuxa mamam, _ Sen saidan ici? _ RmerTo Cemo, _ vupasuxe me, _ yvela mis Teorias vicnob da vici, visganac isesxa. magram sulis dakargvis araviTari survili ara maqvs, me misi ukan dabruneba minda. _ ki magram, dakarge? _ diax.
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_ sad aris? _ romSi, _ vupasuxe me, Tvalebi gavaxile da gavicine. mamas marTlac SeeSinda, erTianad gafiTrda da daberda. mis sityvebSi SvebasTan erTad sibraze igrZnoboda. _ lawirako, _ miTxra man, _ gamaTamaSe? _ samwuxarod, ara bolomde da arc ise ostaturad, _ vupasuxe me, _ geneholmi ityoda: `jer kidev metismetad naturalisturia~, da marTalic iqneboda. homoseqsualistebi metwilad marTals amboben, radgan mdidari intuicia aqvT, magram meti araferi gaaCniaT. ra gaewyoba. _ lawirako, _ gaimeora mamaCemma. _ rogor gamacure. _ ara, _ vupasuxe me, _ ara, namdvil brmaze metad ar gamicurebixar. aucilebeli ar aris, xelebi afaTuro da sayrdeni eZebo. zogi marTla brmaa da mainc brmas TamaSobs. ginda ai, axla, Sen Tvalwin koWlobiT mival karamde da Sen tkivilisa da TanagrZnobisagan ayvirdebi, maSinve daurekav msoflioSi saukeTeso qirurgs, freTcers. daviwyo? _ me ukve fexze wamovdeqi. _ ar minda, moeSvi, _ miTxra gawamebulma da isev davjeqi. _ Senc dajeqi, _ vTxove me, _ ver visveneb, roca fexze dgaxar. mama dajda, mineraluri wyali daisxa da dabneulma Semomxeda. _ Sensas kaci verafers gaigebs, _ miTxra man, _ gamagebine mainc, ra ginda? sad girCevnia gaemgzavro saswavleblad _ londonSi, parizSi Tu briuselSi, swavlis fuls gadavixdi. saukeTesos Tu avirCevT, kargia. _ ara, _ vupasuxe daRlilma, _ swored es iqneboda cudi, swavla veraviTar sargeblobas veRar momitans. CemTvis mxolod muSaobaa saWiro. vswavlobdi cameti wlisa, ToTxmetisa, vswavlobdi ocdaerT wlamde. mxolod Tqven ar SegimCneviaT es. geneholmi Tu marTla fiqrobs, rom me kidev SemiZlia rame axali viswavlo, ufro briyvi yofila, vidre megona. _ geneholmi specialistia, _ miTxra mamam, _ yvelaze kargi specialisti imaT Soris, visac ki aq vicnob.
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_ marTalia, aseTi specialisti Cven ar gvyavs, _ vupasuxe me, _ magram igi mainc specialistia da meti araferi. gvarianad icnobs Teatrs, erkveva tragediaSi, komediaSi, Commedia dellarte1-Si, pantomimaSi, magram, aba, Sexede, ras hgavs misi komedianturi cdebi, roca uecrad iisfer perangSi gamowyobili da Savi abreSumis bafTiT yeldamSvenebuli gamogvecxadeba. aseTi ramisa diletantsac ki Sercxveboda. yvelaze uaresi is ki ar aris, kritikosebi rom kritikulad arian ganwyobilni, aramed is, rom sakuTari Tavis mimarT arc kritikul damokidebulebas iCenen da arc iumoris grZnoba gaaCniaT, rac savalaloa. ra Tqma unda, geneholmi kargi specialistia, magram Tu hgonia, scenaze gatarebuli eqvsi wlis Semdeg kidev swavlas unda Sevudge _ suleli yofila. _ maS, fuli ar gWirdeba? _ mkiTxa man. mis xmaSi raRac Svebis magvari igrZnoboda da aman eWvi aRmiZra. _ rogor ara, _ vupasuxe me, _ fuli Zalian mWirdeba. _ raSi unda gamoiyeno. aseT viTarebaSi kvlav apireb scenaze gamosvlas? _ ra viTarebaSi? _ vkiTxe me. _ ra da, _ miTxra odnav darcxvenilma, _ xom ici, rasac weren Senze gazeTebi. _ gazeTebi? _ vkiTxe me. _ sami Tvea mxolod provinciis scenaze gamovdivar. _ me yvela gazeTs movuyare Tavi da geneholmTan erTad Seviswavle. _ daswyevlos eSmakma, _ vTqvi me, _ ramdeni gadauxade amaSi? mama gawiTlda. _ moveSvaT am ambavs, _ miTxra man, _ amgvarad, ras apireb? _ varjiSs, _ vupasuxe me, _ naxevari weli, erTi weli, jerjerobiT ar vici. _ sad?
1

Commedia dellarte (ital.) _ niRbebis komedia.

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_ sad da aq, _ vuTxari me, _ aba, sxvagan kidev sad? man Tavs Zala daatana, rom SiSi ar gamoemJRavnebina. _ arc SegawuxebT da arc SegarcxvenT, Tqvens Jurfiqszec ki ar moval, _ vuTxari me. igi gawiTlda. ramdenjerme maT Jurfiqsze, Sinaurulad ki ara, ucxosaviT gamovcxaddi. stumariviT vsvamdi koqteils, vatandi zeTisxils, vsvamdi Cais, xolo gamomSvidobebisas sigaretebs ise mourideblad vitenidi jibeSi, rom mosamsaxureebi amas xedavdnen, wiTldebodnen da pirs maridebdnen. _ ah, _ Tqva mamaCemma da savarZelSi Setrialda. yvelafers erCia amdgariyo da fanjarasTan gaCerebuliyo, magram amis nacvlad Tvalebi daxara da miTxra: _ merCia ufro saimedo gzas dasdgomodi, im gzas, geneholmi rom girCevs. saeWvo saqmis dafinanseba miWirs. nuTu Sen araferi dazoge? bolo wlebSi mgoni, kargi Semosavali gqonda. _ pfenigi ar damizogavs. jibeSi mxolod erTi marka midevs. jibidan marka amoviRe da mamas vuCvene. igi marTla daixara da ise dauwyo Tvaliereba markas, rogorc ucnaur mwers. _ dajereba miWirs, _ miTxra man, _ yovel SemTxvevaSi, mflangvelad me ar gamizrdixar. ra Tanxa dagWirdeba yovelTviurad, rogora gaqvs mTeli es ambavi warmodgenili? guli Zlier amiCqrolda. ar megona, ase pirdapir Tu SemomTavazebda daxmarebas. davfiqrdi, arc Zalian bevri unda momeTxova da arc Zalian cota. erTi sityviT, imdeni, rom sacxovreblad myofnoda. magram warmodgena ar mqonda, ramdeni damijdeboda. ise avReldi, oflma damasxa. _ upirveles yovlisa, _ vTqvi me, _ mWirdeba rezinis sqeli leibi, daaxloebiT am oTaxis sigrZe-siganisa, Svidi metri xuTze. SegiZlia ufro iafad SeiZino rezinis damamzadebeli fabrikidan, rainze rom gaqvT. _ keTili, _ miTxra man RimiliT, _ Semomiwiravs leibi _ Svidi metri xuTze, magram geneholmi fiqrobs, rom akrobatikaze ar unda daxurdavde. _ arc vapireb, mami, _ vuTxari me, _ leibis garda, TveSi aTasi marka damWirdeba.
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_ aTasi marka, _ gaikvirva man da wamodga. mamaCems marTla SeeSinda, tuCebi ukankalebda. _ ho, kargi, _ vuTxari me, _ Sen ramdens varaudobdi? warmodgena ar mqonda, sinamdvileSi ramdeni fuli hqonda mamaCems. imdeni angariSi ki vicodi, TveSi aTasi marka weliwadSi rom Tormeti aTas markamde avidoda, magram aseTi Tanxa mas ar gaakotrebda. igi marTlac milioneri iyo. es maris mamam erTxel miangariSa da dawvrilebiTac amixsna. axla zustad aRar maxsovs, magram mamaCems aqciebi yvelgan hqonda da yvelaferSi `eria xeli~, sabanao fxvnilebisa da siTxeebis fabrikaSic ki. mama Tavisi savarZlis ukan sruliad mSvidad scemda bolTas da tuCebs ise amoZravebda, TiTqos raRacas angariSobso. iqneb, marTlac angariSobda, magram es Zalian didxans gagrZelda. kvlav gamaxsenda, rogor iZunwes Cemma mSoblebma, roca me da mari bonidan gaviqeciT. mamam momwera, moraluri mosazrebebis gamo verafriT dagexmarebio, vimedovneb, sakuTar Tavs da `Sen mier Secdenil wesier, gaubedurebul qaliSvils gamrje marjveniT Seinaxav~. rogorc ici, me yovelTvis vafasebdi moxuc derkums, rogorc mowinaaRmdeges da rogorc adamians, da amitom Seni saqcieli samarcxvinod mimaCniao. Cven kiolnis erT-erTi raionis, erenfeldis pansionatSi vcxovrobdiT. is Svidasi marka, marim rom dedisgan miiRo memkvidreobiT, erT TveSi gaqra. me ki megona, did momWirneobas viCendi da Zalze gonivrulad vxarjavdi fuls. pansionati erenfeldis sadguris maxloblad mdebareobda. Cveni oTaxis fanjridan rkinigzis miwayrili da aguris wiTeli kedeli moCanda. qalaqSi mura naxSiriT datvirTuli matareblebi Semodiodnen da ukan carieli brundebodnen. sanugeSo sanaxaoba iyo, borblebi gulis amaCuyeblad raxraxebdnen. modi da nu ifiqrebdi Cveni ojaxis gawonasworebul qonebriv mdgomareobaze. saabazanodan TuTiis taStebi da Tokze gakidebuli sarecxi moCanda. zogjer sibneleSi mesmoda, rogor isrodnen fanjridan ezoSi malulad konservis
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kolofs an nagviT savse parks. abazanaSi Cawolili, xSirad vmRerodi liturgiul simRerebs. diasaxlisma jer simRera amikrZala: xalxi ifiqrebs, gakreWil mRvdlebs vmalavo, Semdeg ki _ abazaniT sargeblobac. misi azriT, metismetad xSirad vbanaobdi, rasac zedmet fufunebad Tvlida. zogjer diasaxlisi ezoSi Cadioda da nagvis gadmomyrelis vinaoba rom daedgina, nagviT savse parkebs qeqavda: xaxvis nafcqvenebi, yavis naleqi, dabegvili katletebis Zvlebi didZal masalas aZlevda fiqrisa da varaudisaTvis, sayasboebsa da bostneulis duqnebSic gamoikiTxavda xolme, iqneb, rame sagulisxmo dascdeTo, magram uSedegod. nasufraliT verc erTxel ver miakvlia, vin iyo es individi. amitom wyevla-krulva, romelsac igi sarecxiT dafarul zecas ugzavnida, ise iyo Camoyalibebuli, rom yvelas egona, piradad me mgulisxmobso. _ veravin momatyuebs, RdinSi Cavyvebi da mainc gavigeb. dildilaobiT fanjris rafaze gadayudebulni vudarajebdiT fostalions, romelsac CvenTvis zogjer maris megobari qalebis, leosa da anas amanaTebi mohqonda. drodadro, Zalze araregularulad, babuaCemic gvigzavnida Ceks. Cemi mSoblebi ki mxolod imas moiTxovdnen, rom Cemi bedis gamgebeli Tavad vyofiliyavi da sakuTari Zal-RoniT gavmklavebodi gaWirvebas. mogvianebiT dedam isic ki momwera, Svilad ar gcnobo. misi ugemovnoba zogjer idiotur ukiduresobamde midioda. werilSi CaCxira citata Snicleris romanidan `gaorebuli guli~. am romanSi mSoblebi ar cnoben TavianT qaliSvils, romelmac uari Tqva gaeCina Svili `keTilSobili, magram uvargisi xelovanisagan~, mgoni, msaxiobisagan. dedam sityvasityviT amowera citata romanis merve Tavidan: `sindisi mkarnaxobs, ar gcno~. dedaCemis azriT, es citata zustad gamoxatavda Cemdami mis damokidebulebas. asea Tu ise, `Svilad aRar mcnobda~. darwmunebuli var, dedaCemma es imitom gaakeTa, rom `arcnoba~ zedmet usiamovnebas aaridebda rogorc mis sindiss, aseve mis pirad angariSze Caricxul fulsac. Cemianebi moelodnen,
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rom me gmiruli cxovrebis gzas davadgebodi: fabrikaSi an mSeneblobaze daviwyebdi muSaobas, raTa satrfo merCina, magram ase ar moviqeci da yvelas imedi gaucruvda. leom da anamac aSkarad magrZnobines, rogor gavucrue maT imedebi. fiqrebSi isini ukve mxedavdnen, rogor gamovdiodi uTenia saxlidan iRliaSi amoCrili TunuqaTi da buterbrodebiT, rogor vugzavnidi xeliT maris oTxas kocnas da saRamoobiT rogor vbrundebodi Sin `daRlili, magram kmayofili~, rogor vkiTxulobdi gazeTebs da Sevcqerodi qsoviT garTul maris. magram me odnavadac ar vcdilvar, maTi es warmodgena realobad meqcia. sul marisTan viyavi da marisac erCia, mis gverdiT vyofiliyavi. Tavs `xelovnad~ vgrZnobdi (gacilebiT metad, vidre odesme migrZnia Semdeg) da oriveni xorcs vasxamdiT Cvens bavSvur ocnebas bohemaze: oTaxSi `kiantis~ boTlebi gvedga, kedlebs jvaloTi da aWrelebuli xis qerqebiT vrTavdiT. roca kiolnSi gatarebul wels vigoneb, ise miCuydeba guli, rom dResac vwiTldebi. kviris bolos mari diasaxliss estumreboda da rogorc ki binis qiris gadavadebas sTxovda, diasaxlisi erT qoTqoTs atexda, Cemze eubneboda, ratom ar iwyebs muSaobaso. _ Cemi qmari xelovania, diax, xelovani, _ eubneboda mari didebuli paTosiT. erTxel gavigone, rogor SesZaxa WuWyian kibeze gaCerebulma marim diasaxliss karRia oTaxSi: _ diax, xelovani! diasaxlisma ki pasuxad xrinwiani xmiT miayvira: _ rao, xelovani? Tanac qmaria? ras gaixareben qorwinebis saregistracio biuroSi! yvelaze ufro diasaxliss is axelebda, rom Cven TiTqmis yoveldRe aT an Tormet saaTamde loginSi viweqiT. aba, sad hqonda am qals imdeni fantazia, mimxvdariyo, rom am gziT yvelaze moxerxebulad vzogavdiT erTi sauzmisa da refleqtorisaTvis saWiro denis fuls, arc is icoda, Tormet saaTamde rom ar miSvebdnen savarjiSod samrevlos patara darbazSi, radgan im darbazSi SuadRemde yovelTvis raRac RonisZieba imarTeboda: konsultacia dedebisaTvis, mecadineoba imaTT154

vis, vinc pirveli ziarebisaTvis emzadeboda da mzareulTa mosamzadebeli kursebis anda sadabo kaTolikuri kooperativis kreba. Cven im eklesiis maxloblad vcxovrobdiT, romlis kapelani hainrih beleni iyo. swored man miSova oTaxi pansionatSi da patara sceniani darbazic damiTmo savarjiSod. maSin bevri kaTolike gulTbilad gvepyroboda. qali, romelic mzareulTa mosamzadebel kursebze mecadineobas atarebda, yovelTvis gvimaspinZldeboda morCenili kerZebiT, umetes SemTxvevaSi wvnianiTa da pudingiT, zogjer xorcsac gvimatebda, xolo roca mari dalagebaSi exmareboda, erT Sekvra karaqs an erT park Saqars imetebda. zogjer darbazSi Cemi varjiSis dawyebamde rCeboda, siciliT kvdeboda da nasadilevs yavas gviduRebda. Cven maSinac kargad gvepyroboda, roca gaigo, rom jvardawerilebi ar viyaviT. me mgoni, is sulac ar fiqrobs, rom xelovani `wesierad qorwindeba~. civ dReebSi ufro adre mivdiodiT samrevlo saxlSi. mari mzareulobas swavlobda, me ki garderobSi vijeqi eleqtrorefleqtorTan da vkiTxulobdi. Txeli kedlis miRma jer xiTxiTi ismoda darbazSi, Semdeg ki seriozuli moxsenebebi kaloriebze, vitaminebsa da kalkulaciaze. erTi sityviT, mTeli es ambavi Zalian marTobda. Cven mxolod dedaTa konsultaciis dRes gvikrZalavdnen iq misvlas, sanam yvelaferi ar moTavdeboda. axalgazrda eqimi qali, romelic konsultacias atarebda, Zalze koreqtuli da Tavaziani iyo, magram Tu rames daiCemebda, Tavisas gaitanda. scenaze rom davxtodi, mtvris buRi dgeboda da SiSiT guli uskdeboda. imasac amtkicebda, mtvris korianteli meore dResac trialebs darbazSi da Cvil bavSvebs vnebso. bolos imas miaRwia, rom konsultaciamde ocdaoTxi saaTis ganmavlobaSi ar mqonda ufleba, scenaze fexi Semedga. amis gamo hainrih belens Selaparakebac ki mouvida mRvdelTan. mRvdelma ar icoda, me rom yoveldRe vvarjiSobdi darbazSi da hainrihs mosTxova: moyvasisadmi siyvarulSi maincdamainc Sors nu Sestopavo. zogjer maris eklesiaSic davyvebodi, iq Zalian Tbiloda, radiators gadavajdebodi xolme, irgvliv siCume sufevda. qu155

Cis xmauri saidanRac Soridan ismoda. carieli eklesia guls esalbuneboda: Svidi-rva kaci Tu Canda aqa-iq. zogjer iseTi grZnoba meufleboda, TiTqos mec vekuTvnodi am wynar, sevdian sakrebulos, romelic mistiroda iseT saqmes, uZlurebaSic ki didebul STabeWdilebas rom axdenda. Cemsa da maris garda eklesiaSi mxolod dedabrebi dadiodnen. wiravda hainrih beleni da misi arapaTetikuri xma kargad exameboda bnel, usaxur eklesias. erTxel diakoni ar movida da hainrihs wirvis damTavrebaSic ki davexmare, swored maSin, roca saxareba marjvnidan marcxniv gadaaqvT. SevamCnie, uecrad hainrihi daibna, ritmi dakarga, imwamsve wamovxti, marjvena mxares dadebuli saxareba aviRe, Sua sakurTxevelTan daviCoqe da saxareba marcxena mxares davde. im dRes rom hainrihs ar davxmarebodi da uxerxuli mdgomareobidan ar gamomeyvana, Cems Tavs uzrdelad CavTvlidi. mari usaSvelod gawiTlda, hainrihs ki gaeRima. erTmaneTs didi xania vicnobdiT, ramdenime wliT Cemze ufrosia, internatSi fexburTis gundis kapitani iyo. wirvis Semdeg hainrihs saeklesio samoselis sacavTan velodi. igi Cveulebriv sauzmeze gvpatiJebda. sawvrilmano duqanSi nisiad yidulobda kvercxs, lors, yavas, sigaretebs da bavSviviT uxaroda, roca misi ekonomi qali avad xdeboda. momagonda yvela adamiani, vinc maSin dagvexmara, am dros ki Cvenebi WuWyian milionebs gadaefofrnen, xeli mkres da TavianTi moraluri safuZvlebiT tkbebodnen. mamaCemi isev bolTas scemda savarZlis ukan da, angariSiT garTuli, tuCebs acmacunebda. erTi piroba davapire meTqva misTvis, ar mWirdeba Seni fuli-meTqi, magram gadavifiqre _ mgoni, mqonda ufleba, rame mimeRo misgan, Tanac jibeSi erTi marka medo da ar mindoda, iseTi gmiroba gamomeCina, Semdeg sananeblad rom gamixdeboda. fuli marTlac mWirdeboda, usaSvelod mWirdeboda, xolo mas Semdeg, rac saxlidan wamovedi, mamas CemTvis pfenigic ar moucia. leom mTeli Tavisi jibis fuli mogvca, ana zogjer sakuTari xeliT gamomcxvar TeTr purs gvigzavnida, mogvianebiT babuaCemic gvigzavnida
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drodadro fuls, TxuTmet, ocmarkian Ceks, xolo erTxel ratomRac ocdaormarkiani Ceki miviReT da dRemde ver mivmxvdarvar, ra iyo amis mizezi. am Cekebis gamo yovelTvis namdvili speqtaklebi imarTeboda. arc Cvens diasaxliss da arc hainrihs bankSi angariSi ar hqondaT gaxsnili. saerTodac, Cveni ar iyos, verc hainrihi erkveoda CekebSi. pirveli Ceki Tavisi mrevlis saqvelmoqmedo fondis angariSze Caricxa, mere ki Semnaxvel salaros miakiTxa da iq auxsnes saCeko operaciebis mizani da nairsaxeoba. amis Semdeg Tavis mRvdelTan gamocxadda da mosTxova TxuTmeti markis Ceki. mRvdeli lamis gagiJda, veraviTar Ceks ver mogcemo, ganucxada hainrihs, mere momkiTxaven, ra mizniT gaecio. saqvelmoqmedo fondi saCoTiro saqmea, xSirad amowmebeno. Tu Cavwere: `mieca sesxad kapelanbelens kerZo angariSsworeba Cekis sakompensaciod~, Semomedavebian, mrevlis saqvelmoqmedo fondis angariSi Savi birJa ar gaxlavT, sadac `bneli warmoSobis~ Cekebs axurdavebeno. mxolod is SeuZlia, angariSsworebis Ceki SemosavalSi Caweros garkveuli Semosawiris saxiT, rogorc Snirisagan SnirisaTvis daxmareba, Semdeg ki momces fuli, rogorc saqvelmoqmedo fondis daxmareba. marTalia, mTlad swori araa, magram aseTi ram mainc dasaSvebiao, gviTxra man. erTi sityviT, am TxuTmeti markis miRebas mTeli aTi dRe dasWirda. hainrihs aTasi sxva saqmec hqonda mosagvarebeli da Cemi Cekis ganaRdebas xom ver Seswiravda yvelafers. mas Semdeg SiSi mipyrobda, roca babuaCemisagan Ceki momdioda. is dasawvavi Ceki fulic iyo da arc iyo, arasodes ar iyo is, rac marTla gvWirdeboda _ naRdi fuli. imisaTvis, rom angariSsworebis Cekebis nacvlad CvenTvis gasanaRdebeli Cekebi moeca, bolos da bolos, hainrihma bankSi angariSi gaxsna, magram xSirad igi sami-oTxi dRiT sadRac miemgzavreboda. maSin ki, roca ocdaormarkiani Ceki miviReT, samkvirian SvebulebaSi iyo da me ris vai-vaglaxiT movnaxe kiolnSi Cemi erTaderTi bavSvobis megobari edgar vinekeni. mas raRac Tanamdeboba eWira germaniis social-demokratiuli partiis aparatSi, mgoni, referenti iyo kulturis dargSi. misamarTi telefonis wignSi vipove, magram
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rom damereka, ocpfenigiani ar mqonda. kioln-erenfeldidan kioln-kalkamde fexiT viare, edgari Sir ar damxvda. saRamos rva saaTamde saxlTan velode, radgan diasaxlisma ar isurva, SeveSvi mis binaSi. edgari cxovrobda Zalian didi da Zalian bneli eklesiis maxloblad, engelsis quCaze (dRemde ar vici, rogorc germaniis social-demokratiuli partiis wevri, valdebulad grZnobda Tu ara Tavs, engelsis quCaze dasaxlebuliyo). saSinlad gavwvaldi, Zalze daviRale, mSioda, sigareti ar mqonda, Tanac vicodi, rom mari Sin ijda da wuxda. melanqoliiT daavadebuli kacisaTvis veraferi samkurnalo sanaxaobaa kiolni-kalki, engelsis quCa da maxloblad mdebare qimiuri qarxana. bolos safunTuSeSi Sevedi da gamyidvel qals vTxove, funTuSa maCuqeT-meTqi. qali axalgazrda iyo, magram gonji. davelode im wuTs, roca safunTuSe erTi wamiT dacarielda, swrafad SevaRe kari da gamyidvels ise mivmarTe, rom saRamo mSvidobisac ki ar miTqvams: _ maCuqeT erTi funTuSa. meSinoda, aravin Semomswreboda. qalma Semomxeda, isedac Txeli, uJmuri tuCebi jer ufro gauTxelda, Semdeg daumrgvalda da amoeburca, bolos parkSi sami funTuSa da nazuqi Cado da uxmod momawoda. mgoni, madlobac ki ar miTqvams, parks xeli davtace da gareT gamovvardi. Semdeg im karis zRurblze Camovjeqi, sadac edgari cxovrobda, funTuSasa da nazuqs vnTqavdi da drodadro im jibes visinjavdi, sadac ocdaormarkiani Ceki medo. ocdaori ucnauri ricxvi iyo, saidan gaCnda, iqneb, romelime sabanko angariSis naSTia-meTqi, vfiqrobdi CemTvis. iqneb, gamexumra an SemTxvevis bralia, magram ucnauri is iyo, rom 22 ricxviTac ewera da sityvieradac da roca werda, babua uTuod raRacas fiqrobda. ras _ verafriT mivxvdi. Semdeg aRmoCnda, rom kalkis raionSi, engelsis quCaze edgars mxolod saaT-naxevari velodi, me ki es dros mWmunvarebiT aRsavse usasrulobad momeCvena. mTrgunavda Carigebuli bneli saxlebi da qimiuri qarxnis kvamli. edgars ise gauxarda Cemi danaxva, rom saxe gaubrwyinda. mxarze xeli damkra da oTaxSi Semiyvana. kedelze brextis didi suraTi ekida,
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mis qveS _ gitara. sakuTari xeliT Sekowiwebul Taroze jibis gamocemebi elaga. gavigone, gareT gasuli rogor gauwyra diasaxliss imisaTvis, rom oTaxSi ar SemomiSva. Semdeg arayi moitana da saxegabrwyinebulma miambo, rogor mougo brZola Teatralur saqmeTa komitetSi qristian-demokratiuli partiis aqoTebul ZaRlebs. mere mTxova, meambna yvelaferi, rac Tavs gadamxda Cveni ukanaskneli Sexvedris Semdeg. bavSvobaSi sul erTad vTamaSobdiT. mamamisi jer sacurao auzis zedamxedveli iyo, Semdeg ki Cveni saxlis maxloblad mdebare sportuli moednis daraji. moyolis Tavi ar mqonda, Sevexvewe, momeSvi-meTqi. oriode sityviT gavacani Cemi mdgomareoba da Cekis sanacvlod fuli vTxove. man yvelaferi gaigo, didi keTilSobileba gamoiCina da maSinve ocdaaTi marka naRdi fuli momca. arafriT ar undoda Cekis aReba, magram TiTqmis cremlmoreuli Sevexvewe, gamomarTvi-meTqi. bolos, roca didi xvewna-mudaris Semdeg Ceki gamomarTva, cota nawyeni darCa. vTxove, gvwveoda, enaxa, rogor vvarjiSobdi. bolos fostasTan rom tramvais gaCerebaa, iqamde mimacila, magram am dros moedanze gaCerebuli Tavisufali taqsi davinaxe, misken gavqandi da Cavjeqi. roca manqana daiZra, edgaris gaognebul, nawyen, gafiTrebul farTo saxes ZlivsRa movkari Tvali. maSin pirvelad miveci Tavs taqsiSi Cajdomis ufleba da Tu odesme romelime adamians taqsiT mgzavroba daumsaxurebia, im saRamos aseTi kaci me viyavi. ver gavuZlebdi mTel kiolnSi tramvaiT jayjays da kidev erTi saaTiT maris unaxaobas. taqsiT mgzavroba rva markamde damijda, mZRols ocdaaTi pfenigi vaCuqe, da Cveni pansionatis kibeze avirbine. atirebuli mari kiserze Camomekida da mec avtirdi. orivem didi SiSi vWameT, mTeli saukune viyaviT daSorebuli erTmaneTs da uzomod sasowarkveTilebs erTmaneTisaTvis arc ki gvikocnia. mxolod gauTaveblad vCurCulebdiT, rom aRarasodes, aRarasodes, aRarasodes davSordebiT erTmaneTs. `sanam sikvdili ar gagvyris~, CamCurCula marim. Semdeg marim `wesrigSi moiyvana Tavi~, _ ase uwodebda amas, _ tuCebi SeiReba, loyebi Seiferada da Cven dasanayreblad venloeStrases erT-erT budruganaSi SevediT.
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or-ori ulufa guliaSi geaxeliT, Semdeg erTi boTli wiTeli Rvino viyideT da Sin davbrundiT. edgarma taqsiT mgzavroba bolomde verafriT mapatia. mas Semdeg xSirad vxvdebodiT erTmaneTs, xolo roca maris muceli moeSala, kidev erTxel dagvexmara fuliT. marTalia, Cems imdRevandel taqsiT gamgzavrebaze araferi uTqvams, magram erTgvari undobloba Cem mimarT mainc gauCnda da dRemde ver moiSora. _ o, RmerTo, _ Tqva mamaCemma xmamaRla da imgvari toniT, rom Zalze meucxova, _ gaaxile Tvalebi da xmamaRla ilaparake. msgavsi fandebi CemTan aRar gagiva. Tvalebi gavaxile da mamas Sevxede. gabrazebuli iyo. _ gana vlaparakobdi? _ vkiTxe me. _ diax, _ miTxra man, _ raRacas luRluRebdi SenTvis, magram me veraferi gavige, garda `WuWyiani milionebisa~. _ es aris erTaderTi ram, risi gagebac SegiZlia da gesmis kidec. _ kidev gavigone `angariSsworebis Ceki~. _ diax, diax, _ vuTxari me, _ axla ki Camojeqi da miTxari, ra Tanxas varaudobdi, roca erTi wlis ganmavlobaSi yovelTviur daxmarebas mpirdebodi? mamas mivuaxlovdi, xeli frTxilad movkide mxrebSi da savarZelSi Cavsvi. igi maSinve wamodga da Cven Zalian axlos aRmovCndiT erTmaneTis pirispir. _ es saqme yovelmxriv avwon-davwone, _ miTxra man, _ Tu ar mogwons Cemi piroba, Tu ar ginda kontrols daqvemdebarebuli soliduri ganaTleba miiRo da aq gsurs muSaoba... maSin, ase vTqvaT, TveSi orasi marka sakmarisi iqneba. darwmunebuli viyavi, rom oras ormocdaaTis an samasis SemoTavazebas apirebda, magram sul bolo wamSi orasi Tqva. etyoba, Cemma gamometyvelebam SeaSina, radgan ise swrafad daiwyo laparaki, mis darbaislur garegnobas sul rom ar Seefereboda. _ geneholmi ambobs, pantomimis safuZveli asketizmiao.
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xma arc amjerad amomiRia. mamas klaistis TojinasaviT `carieli TvalebiT~ vucqerodi. gulic ki ar momdioda, imdenad gaocebuli viyavi, rom carieli Tvalebi, ris miRwevac varjiSis dros Zalian miWirda, axla bunebriv gamometyvelebad meqca. mama nerviulobda, zeda tuCi oflma daunama. pirvel wuTebSi arc gabrazebas vgrZnobdi da arc siZulvils. carieli Tvalebi nel-nela TanagrZnobiT amevso. _ Zvirfaso mami, _ daviwye wynarad, _ orasi marka sulac ar aris iseTi cota, rogoric Sen ggonia, sakmaod mozrdili Tanxaa, amaze ar minda gedavo, magram ici ki, rom asketizmi sakmaod Zvirad Rirebuli siamovnebaa, yovel SemTxvevaSi, asketizmis is saxe, geneholms rom aqvs mxedvelobaSi. aseTi asketizmis safuZveli mkacri dietaa... saWiroa bevri mWle xorci, nair-nairi salaTebi. asketizmis yvelaze iafi forma SimSilia, magram mSieri klouni... Tumca mTvral klouns isev mSieri sjobia. ukan davixie. ar msiamovnebda masTan ise axlos dgoma, rom damenaxa, rogor umsxvildeboda tuCebze oflis wveTebi. _ mismine, _ vuTxari me, _ fulze nuRar vilaparakebT, vilaparakoT sxva rameze, rogorc jentlmenebs SeSveniT. _ me marTla msurs dagexmaro, _ miTxra sasowarkveTili xmiT, _ siamovnebiT mogcem samas markas. _ fulze sityvis gagoneba aRar minda. mirCevnia is giTxra, ris aRmoCenam gamakvirva yvelaze metad bavSvobaSi. _ mainc? _ mkiTxa man da ise Semomxeda, TiTqos sasikvdilo ganaCens eloda. darwmunebuli iyo, sityvas Camovagdebdi mis sayvarelze, romelsac godesbergSi vila auSena. _ damSviddi, damSviddi, _ vuTxari me, _ SeiZleba gagikvirdes, magram bavSvobaSi yvelaze metad is gvakvirvebda, rom saxlSi saxeTqi arasodes gvyofnida. sityva `saxeTqis~ gagonebaze SekrTa, nerwyvi gadaylapa, xrinwianad gaicina da miTxra: _ albaT, imis Tqma ginda, rom saWmeli ar gqondaT saZRomad. _ zustad, _ vupasuxe mSvidad, _ saWmeli arasodes gvqon161

da saZRomad, yovel SemTxvevaSi, saxlSi _ arasodes. dRemde ar vici, ra iyo amis mizezi _ principi Tu siZunwe. netav, Tu ici, ras grZnobs bavSvi, romelmac naxevari dRe velosipediT inavarda, fexburTi iTamaSa da rainSi icurava? _ albaT, mglis mada eRviZeba, _ miTxra man. _ ara, _ vupasuxe me, _ mSieria. daswyevlos eSmakma, bavSvobidanve vicodiT, rom mdidrebi viyaviT, Zalian mdidrebi, magram am simdidridan Cven araferi gvxdomia wilad, rigianad verc ki vWamdiT. _ gakldaT rame? _ diax, _ vupasuxe me. _ xom giTxari, saWmeli-meTqi. garda amisa, jibis fuli. ici, ra menatreboda bavSvobaSi? _ RmerTo Cemo, _ wamoiZaxa SeSinebulma, _ ra? _ kartofili, _ vupasuxe me, _ magram deda maSin gaxdomis maniam Seipyro, _ xom ici, mudam uswrebda dros, _ Cvens saxlSi yovelTvis fuTfuTebdnen ugunuri ybedebi, TiToeuls gansxvavebuli kvebis Teoria hqonda da, samwuxarod, am TeoriebSi kartofili araviTar didebiT rols ar TamaSobda. roca Sin ar iyaviT, moaxleebi samzareuloSi kartofils ixarSavdnen, kanianad xarSavdnen da Semdeg karaqiT, mariliTa da xaxviT kazmavdnen. zogjer Cvenc gvaRviZebdnen, uflebas gvaZlevdnen piJamebiani CavsuliyaviT dabla da muceli kartofiliT amogveyora. aseTi gamaspinZlebisaTvis erTi piroba unda dagvecva: krinti ar unda dagveZra aravisTan. paraskeobiT vinekenebTan davdiodiT. maT yovelTvis hqondaT kartofilis salaTa da frau vinekeni sagangebod gvivsebda TefSebs. garda amisa, Cvens ojaxSi yovelTvis cota puri gamohqondaT sufraze, mxedvelobaSi maqvs Cveni puris kalaTi, o, is dawyevlili Wvavis kverebi, pirSi rom xraSaxruSi gahqonda, anda TiTqosda `janmrTelobisaTvis sasargeblo~ naxevrad gamxmari puris naWrebi... vinekenebs ki yovelTvis hqondaT axali puri, edgars TviTon mohqonda safunTuSidan. frau vinekeni marcxena xeliT mTel purs gverdze miidebda, marjveniT ki did, gafumfulebul naWrebs gviWrida. Cven maT vitacebdiT da zemodan vaSlis fafas vusvamdiT.
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daRlili mama Tavs miqnevda. sigaretebi gavuwode, erTi cali aiRo da me cecxli movukide. mecodeboda. mamisaTvis, albaT, Znelia pirvelad esaubros gulaxdilad Svils, romelic ocdarva welsaa mitanebuli. _ da kidev aTasi sxva ram gvaklda, _ ganvagrZe me, _ magaliTad, Zirtkbila an sahaero buStebi. dedas sahaero buStebis yidva mflangvelobad miaCnda. sworia, marTlac, namdvili mflangvelobaa, magram mTeli Tqveni WuWyiani milionebis sahaero buStebiT caSi gasafrenad Cveni mflangvelobisadmi ltolva ar ikmarebda. an Tundac iaffasiani sawuwni kanfetebi. amaze dedas yovlad Semzaravi gonivruli Teoriebi hqonda, romelTa mixedviTac es kanfetebi Sxamia, namdvili Sxami. magram Sxamianis nacvlad ukeTes kanfetebs ar gvirigebda da, saerTod, aranairs ar yidulobda. internatSi yvelas ukvirda, _ ganvagrZe wynarad, _ erTaderTi mowafe me viyavi, romelic arafers iwunebda, rasac maZlevdnen, yvelafers vnTqavdi, Tanac gemrieli meCveneboda. _ xom xedav, _ miTxra mamam gulgrilad, _ Tavisi kargi mxare Turme amasac hqonia. _ misi sityvebi arc damajereblad JRerda da arc xalisianad. _ ra Tqma unda, _ vupasuxe me, _ CemTvis savsebiT gasagebia amgvari aRzrdis Teoriul-pedagogiuri mniSvneloba, magram yovelive es mxolod Teoria, pedagogika, fsiqologia, qimia iyo da momakvdinebeli uxamsoba. me vicodi, rodis iRebdnen fuls vinekenebi _ paraskeobiT, Snaivindebs da holareTebs yoveli Tvis pirvelsa da TxuTmet ricxvebSi uCndebodaT fuli _ ojaxis yovel wevrs raRac gansakuTrebiT gemrieli ergeboda xolme, Zexvis didi naWeri an namcxvari. frau vinekeni paraskev dilas yovelTvis parikmaxerTan midioda, radgan saRamos... Sen, albaT, ityodi, veneras msxverpls swiravdnen. _ ra Tqvi? _ wamoiZaxa man, _ Sen imas xom ar gulisxmob... _ diax, _ vupasuxe me, _ swored imas vgulisxmob... paraskeobiT, naSuadRevs, bavSvebs kinoSi uSvebdnen, manamde imis uflebasac ki aZlevdnen, nayini eWamaT. ase rom, sul cota sam-naxevari saaTi ar iyvnen Sin. am droisaTvis edgaris deda
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saparikmaxerodan brundeboda, mama ki samuSaodan da jibeSic xelfasiani konverti edo. xom ici, muSebs maincdamainc farTo binebi ara aqvT. _ maS, _ Tqva mamaCemma, _ Tqven icodiT, ratom gzavnidnen bavSvebs kinoSi? _ zustad, cxadia, ar vicodi, _ vupasuxe me, _ bevr rames mxolod mogvianebiT mivxvdi, maSin, roca am ambebze daviwye fiqri. kidev ufro mogvianebiT mivxvdi, ratom wiTldeboda gulis amaCuyeblad frau vinekeni, roca kinodan vbrundebodiT da kartofilis salaTas SeveqceodiT. Semdeg ki, roca misi qmari sportuli moednis daraji gaxda, yvelaferi Seicvala, ufro xSirad iyo saxlSi. bavSvebi mxolod imas vamCnevdiT, rom im dRes qali rogorRac uxerxulad grZnobda Tavs da mxolod mogvianebiT mivxvdi _ ratom. patara bina hqondaT, _ erTi didi oTaxi da samzareulo, _ Tan sami bavSvi hyavdaT, hoda, col-qmarsac sxva gza ar hqonda. mamaCemi iseTi Tavzardacemuli iyo, rom SemeSinda, yovelive amis Semdeg fulze laparaki uadgilod ar mieCnia. Cvens Sexvedras igi tragikulad aRiqvamda, magram cotaTi ukve tkbeboda am tragizmiTac da Tavisi keTilSobiluri tanjviTac. erTi sityviT, yovelive es moswonda da amitom gaWirdeboda misi Semobruneba samasi markisaken, romlis yovelTviurad mocemasac dampirda. fulze laparaki iseve saCoTiroa, rogorc `xorciel Jinze~. fulze aravin laparakobs ise, rogorc saWiroa, aravin fiqrobs ise, rogorc saWiroa. fuls _ rogorc marim Tqva mRvdlebis xorciel Jinze _ an `sublimirebulad~ aRiqvamen, an vulgarulad da arasodes esmiT, rom ama Tu im wuTSi is aris: saWmeli, taqsi, erTi kolofi sigareti Tu abazaniani oTaxi. aSkarad Canda, rom mamaCemi itanjeboda da es SemaZrwuneblad moqmedebda Cemze. fanjrisaken Semobrunebulma jibidan cxvirsaxoci amoiRo da oriode cremli SeimSrala. atirebuli mama aqamde arasodes menaxa, arc is minaxavs, cxvirsaxoci daniSnulebisamebr gamoeyenebina odesme. or sufTa cxvirsaxocs yovel diliT miarTmevdnen, xolo saRamos
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odnav daWmuWnulsa da TiTqmis gaWuWyianebuls saabazanoSi dadgmul sarecxis kalaTSi yrida. iyo dro, roca sarecxi fxvnilebis Sovna Wirda da xelmomWirne dedaCemi didxans edaveboda, nuTu ar SegiZlia cxvirsaxocebi or-sam dRes mainc ataroo. _ Sen xom maT ar svri, ubralod, jibeSi gidevs. nu iviwyeb movaleobas eris winaSe. _ dedas mxedvelobaSi hqonda ori mowodeba: `gamovucxadoT brZola yovelgvar uyairaTobas~ da `wyalSi nu gadayri nurc erT pfenigs~. magram mamam _ ramdenadac maxsovs, erTaderTxel _ gamoiCina cxovrebaSi simtkice da Tavisi gaitana. yovel diliT or gaqaTqaTebul cxvirsaxocs miarTmevdnen. mis saxeze arc mtveri minaxavs arasodes, arc risime wveTi da arc araferi iseTi, cxvirsaxociT rom unda moiwmindo. axla ki fanjarasTan idga da marto cremls ki ara, iseT vulgarul raRacasac iwmendda, rogoric aris zeda tuCze gamosuli ofli. me samzareuloSi gavedi, radgan mama isev tiroda, zluqunic ki gavigone. amqveynad cotaa iseTi adamiani, visi TandaswrebiTac tirilis ar mogerideba da me gavifiqre, sakuTari vaJiSvili, romelsac rigianad arc ki icnob, am dros yvelaze Seuferebeli mowmea-meTqi. piradad me mxolod erT adamians vicnobdi, visi TandaswrebiTac SemeZlo metira _ es iyo mari. samagierod, warmodgena ara mqonda, iyo Tu ara mamaCemis sayvareli im yaidisa, rom misi TandaswrebiT mamas tirili SesZleboda. is qali mxolod erTxel vnaxe _ lamazi, momxibvleli da sasiamovnod suleli aRmoCnda, Tumca masze manamdec bevri ram gamegona. naTesavebi ambobdnen, fuls daxarbebuli qaliao, magram Cvens naTesavebs fuls daxarbebul adamianebad miaCndaT yvela, vinc utifrobas gamoiCenda da Segvaxsenebda, rom adamians drodadro Wama, sma da fexsacmlis yidva sWirdeba. xolo Tu vinme ganacxadebs, sigareti, cxeli abazana, yvavilebi da arayi CemTvis sasicocxlod aucilebeli ram ariso, giJad gamoacxadeben da Snirebis ojaxis qronikaSi `mflangveli maniakis~ saxels daimkvidrebs. mSvenivrad warmomidgenia, sayvarlis yola rom Zvirad
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Rirebuli siamovnebaa _ unda iyidos windebi, kabebi, gadaixados binis qira da mudam karg xasiaTzec iyos, rac mamaCemis TqmiT, mxolod `sruliad gawonasworebuli finansuri mdgomareobis dros~ xerxdeba. roca mama sameTvalyureo sabWos momakvdineblad mosawyeni sxdomebis Semdeg masTan midioda, qali xalisiani, parikmaxerTan Tmadavarcxnili da surnelovani unda daxvedroda. ara mgonia, is qali angarebiani iyos, ubralod, sayvarlis Senaxva Zviri ujdeba mamaCems, magram Cveni naTesavebisaTvis igi mainc fuls daxarbebuli qalia. erTxel mebaRe henkelsma, romelic zogjer moxuc meetles exmareboda, Zalze mokrZalebiT ganacxada, damxmare muSebis xelfasi `ager ukve sami welia~ gaizarda, Tqven ki isev Zveleburad cotas mixdiTo. dedaCemma wikvin-wikviniT waikiTxa samsaaTiani moxseneba `zogierTi adamianis sixarbeze~. isic maxsovs, dedam fostalions saaxalwlo misaloci baraTebis motanisaTvis jildod ocdaxuTi pfenigi misca, xolo meore dRes is fuli safosto yuTSi ipova. fostalions konvertSi fulTan erTad baraTic Caedo, sadac swerda: `mowyaleo qalbatono, Tavs nebas ver mivcem, gagZarcvoT~. dedaCemi saSinlad aRSfoTda. igi, ra Tqma unda, icnobda kavSirgabmulobis saministros romeliRac mdivans da swored masTan uCivla am `angarebiansa da utifar kacs~. samzareuloSi gasulma yavis Sav gubes swrafad Semovuare, derefanSi gaviare da saabazanoSi Sevedi. roca abazanas sacobs vaZrobdi, uecrad gamaxsenda, mravali wlis ganmavlobaSi pirvelad vinebivre abazanaSi ise, rom `litania lauretanac~ ki ar mimReria. abazana wylisagan icleboda. sanam SxapiT abazanis kedlebze darCenil qafs vrecxavdi, RiRiniT Tantum Ergo wamoviwye, Semdeg `litania lauretanac~ wavimRere. yovelTvis miyvarda es ebraeli qalwuli miriami da zogjer mwamda kidec misi. magram Sveba verc `litania lauretanam~ momgvara. albaT imitom, rom metismetad kaTolikuri iyo, me ki gabrazebuli viyavi kaTolicizmzec da kaTolikeebzec. gadavwyvite, hainrih belenisa da karl emondsisaTvis damereka. karl emondss ar
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davlaparakebivar im saSineli Cxubis Semdeg, ori wlis winaT rom mogvivida, miwer-mowera ki erTmaneTTan arasodes gvqonia. raRac suleluri mizezis gamo igi saSinlad momeqca. karli da sabine kinoSi wavidnen, mari Tavis `wris~ sxdomaze iyo, colqmarma TavianTi umcrosi vaJis, erTi wlis gregoris movla me momandes, me ki rZeSi umi kvercxi Cavuxale. sabinem damibara, aT saaTze rZe gaaTbe, boTlSi Caasxi da gregors miecio, magram me bavSvi Zalian fermkrTali da dauZlurebuli momeCvena (tirilis Tavic ki ar hqonda, sacodavad Rnaoda), amitom vifiqre, rZeSi Caxlili umi kvercxi argebs-meTqi. sanam rZe SeTbeboda, xelSi aviyvane, samzareuloSi aqeT-iqiT vatarebdi da Tan velaparakebodi: _ aba, mixvdi, ras miirTmevs axla Cveni biWuna, ras da kvercxs, _ da ase Semdeg. mere kvercxi gavtexe, miqserSi avTqvife da rZeSi gavurie. karlis ufros Svilebs magrad eZinaT, bavSvTan erTad samzareuloSi mSvidad vgrZnobdi Tavs. gregors rZiani boTli mivawode. iseTi STabeWdileba Semeqmna, rom kvercxiani rZe bavSvma kargad Seirgo, man gamiRima da ise daiZina imwamsve, aRar uRnavlia. roca kinodan dabrunebulma karlma samzareuloSi kvercxis naWuWebi aRmoaCina, saerTo oTaxSi gamovida, sadac sabinesTan erTad vijeqi, da miTxra: _ gonivrulad moqceulxar, SenTvis rom kvercxi mogixarSavs. me vuTxari, kvercxi CemTvis ki ar movxarSe, gregors vaWamemeTqi. imwamsve atyda jojoxeTuri vai-uSvelebeli da lanZRva-gineba. sabines namdvili isterika daemarTa da `mkvlels~ meZaxda, karli miyviroda: `Se mawanwala, Se kaxpebis kuro~. am sityvebma ise gamacofa, rom karls vuyvire, `Se dakrunCxulo maswavlebelo~-meTqi, Semdeg paltos xeli davtace da maTi binidan ganrisxebuli gamovvardi. karlma esec ar makmara da kibeze CamomZaxa: _ upasuxismgeblo vigindarav! me ki qvemodan avZaxe: _ isterikiT Sepyrobilo filistero, tvingaxevebulo bato!
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bavSvebi marTla mTeli suliTa da guliT miyvars, isic vici, rogor unda movepyra, gansakuTrebiT Cvilebs. verafriT warmomedgina, rom erTi wlis bavSvs kvercxi awyenda, magram karlma ufro Seuracxmyo, vidre sabines `mkvlelma~. sabines aRSfoTeba gasagebi iyo, ras ar apatieb da ras ar mouTmen aRelvebul dedas, magram karlma kargad icis, rom `kaxpebis kuro~ ara var. saerTod Cveni urTierToba Tavidanve rogorRac idioturad daiZaba. gulis siRrmeSi mas Cemi Tavisufali cxovreba `didebuli~ eCveneboda, me ki gulis siRrmeSi misi filisteruli cxovreba mizidavda. verafriT gavagebine, rogori awonil-dawonili cxovreba mqonda, xolo qalaqidan qalaqSi matarebliT mogzauroba, sastumroebi, varjiSi, scenaze gamosvla, riC-raCis TamaSi da ludis sma ra momakvdineblad mosawyeni iyo... da rom me mizidavda iseTi cxovreba, rogoriTac igi cxovrobda, swored filisteruli arsis gamo. igi ki, ra Tqma unda, sxvebiviT fiqrobda, rom Cven ganzrax ar vaCendiT Svilebs da maris muclis moSla mudam `saeWvod~ miaCnda. netav, scodnoda, ra siamovnebiT viyoliebdiT bavSvebs. miuxedavad amisa, mainc gavugzavne depeSa, daereka CemTvis, magram ara imitom, rom fuls davsesxebodi. axla maT ukve oTxi Svili hyavdaT da fuli ar hyofnidaT. abazana kidev erTxel gavrecxe, Semdeg auCqareblad gavedi derefanSi da karRia saerTo oTaxSi Sevixede. mamaCemi isev magidisaken iyo pirSeqceuli, magram aRar tiroda. gawiTlebuli cxviri da sveli, danaoWebuli loyebi ucxo berikacis iers aZlevda _ sicivisagan akankalebuli, saocrad dacarielebuli, TiTqmis briyvi berikacis iers. koniaki davusxi da Wiqa mivawode. gamomarTva da dalia. saocrad briyvuli gamometyveleba mainc ar Camoscilda mis saxes, raRac Steruli iyo imaSic, Wiqa rogor dacala da momawoda mudariT savse TvalebiT, rac aqamde arasodes SemimCnevia. iseTi gamometyveleba hqonda, TiTqos kriminaluri romanebis, garkveuli markis Rvinisa da suleluri anekdotebis meti marTlac araferi ainteresebda amqveynad. sveli da daWmuWnili cxvirsaxoci
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magidaze ubralod daagdo da stilis es gasaocari darRveva ise aRviqvi, rogorc gaugonari bavSvis sijiute, aTasjer rom eubnebian, cxvirsaxocis magidaze dadeba ar SeiZlebao da mainc debs. kidev davusxi cota koniaki. man dalia da xeli iseTnairad gaiqnia, am moZraobas mxolod ase Tu avxsnidi: `geTayva, palto momawode~. magram me TiTqos veraferi davinaxe. raRac unda meRona, rom mas kvlav Camoegdo fulze sityva. jibidan marka amoviRe da monetiT Jonglioroba daviwye. jer zeviT aSveril marjvena mklavze Camovigore, Semdeg imave gziT ukanve davabrune. amgvarma jambazobam xasiaTze ver moiyvana, gawamebuli saxe hqonda. Semdeg moneta TiTqmis Weramde avisrole da isev daviWire. man ganmeorebiT maniSna: `geTayva, momawode palto~. marka kidev erTxel avagde zeviT, marjvena fexis ceriT daviWire, maRla avwie, TiTqmis cxvirTan mivutane, ris gamoc, gajavrebulma, xeli Caiqnia da buzRuniT miTxra: `moeSvi amas!~ mxrebi aviCeCe, winkarSi gavedi da sakididan palto da qudi Camovxseni. igi ukve Cem gverdiT idga. jer paltos CacmaSi davexmare, Semdeg qudidan amovardnil, iatakze dacvenil xelTaTmanebs davavle xeli da mivawode. cxviri da tuCebi ise sacodavad moeRrica, rom atirebas aRaraferi aklda. _ nuTu kargs arafers metyvi? _ wamCurCula man. _ rogor ara, _ vuTxari Cumad, _ Zalian kargi iyo, mxarze rom xeli damade, roca is idiotebi masamarTlebdnen, xolo gansakuTrebiT kargi is iyo, frau vinekeni rom ixseni, roca WkuanaRrZobi maiori daxvretas upirebda. _ ah, me TiTqmis damaviwyda es ambebi, _ Tqva man. _ Zalian kargia, rom dagaviwyda, me ki araferi damviwyebia, _ vuTxari me. man Semomxeda da uxmod Semevedra, henrieTes saxeli ar axsenoo. arc mixsenebia, Tumca ganzraxuli mqonda mekiTxa, ratom ar moiqca maSin kargad da ratom ar aukrZala henrieTes skolidan samxedro nawilSi eqskursiaze wasvla. Tavi davuqnie mxolod da igi mixvda, rom henrieTeze arafers vityodi. raRa Tqma unda, roca sameTvalyureo sabWos sxdomebze ijda
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da mowyenilobisagan qaRaldze kacunebs jRabnida, zogjer albaT aso `h~-c gamohyavda. erTxel, meored, xandaxan, albaT, sruli saxelic: `henrieTe~. igi ar iyo damnaSave, raRacnairi ugunuri kaci iyo, rasac tragizmTan araferi aqvs saerTo anda, piriqiT, tragizmis wina pirobas qmnis. ar vici, ra rogoraa. mamaCemi zrdili, daxvewili, TmaSevercxlili kacia da uaRresad keTili gamometyveleba aqvs, magram roca marisTan erTad kiolnSi vcxovrobdi, CemTvis erTi groSic ki ar gamougzavnia. ra matebda mamaCems, am xaTrian berikacs amden Zalasa da simtkices? ratom laparakobda televizoris ekranidan sazogadoebriv valdebulebaze, mamuliSvilobaze, germaniasa da qristianobazec ki, rac misi piradi aRiarebiT, odnavadac ar swamda, Tanac laparakobda ise, rom SeuZlebeli iyo, ar dagejerebina? yovelive amas safuZvlad edo fuli, magram ara konkretuli fuli, riTac rZes yidulob, taqsis qiraob, sayvarels inaxav an kinoSi dadixar, aramed abstraqtuli fuli. me misi meSinoda, mas ki Cemi, radgan orivem vicodiT, rom realistebi ar viyaviT, orives gvezizReboda isini, vinc `realur politikaze~ layboben. am ambavs gacilebiT Rrma fesvebi hqonda _ is briyvebi amas verasdros mixvdebodnen. mamaCemis TvalebSi cxadad amovikiTxe: fuls ver miscemda klouns, romlisTvisac fuli imitom arsebobs, rom daxarjos, rac pirdapir ewinaaRmdegeba fulis daniSnulebas. winaswar vicodi, erTi milionic rom moeca, imasac davxarjavdi, misTvis ki fulis yovelgvari xarjva mflangveloba iyo. sanam samzareulosa da saabazanoSi vicdidi, _ mindoda, mamaCems marto gamoetira gamosatirebeli, _ imedi mqonda, amgvari SeZrwunebis Semdeg sakmaod did Tanxas gamoimetebda yovelgvari suleluri pirobis gareSe, magram axla mis TvalebSi cxadad amovikiTxe, rom ase ver moiqceoda. realisti arc is iyo da arc me da orivem vicodiT, rom sxvebi mTeli TavianTi uxamsobiT mxolod realistebi iyvnen, briyvi TojinebiviT aTasjer ikidebdnen sayeloze xels da mainc ver amCnevdnen Zafs, romelzedac farTxalebdnen.
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sabolood rom damemSvidebina, _ fulsa da henrieTeze laparaks ar Camovagdeb-meTqi, _ kidev erTxel davuqnie Tavi, magram piradad me henrieTeze sul sxva ram gavifiqre, rac umarTebulo momeCvena. warmovidgine, rogori iqneboda axla igi: ocdacameti wlis qali, albaT, romeliRac mrewvelis nacolari iqneboda ukve. ver warmomedgina, rom henrieTe Cabmuliyo iaffasian ferxulSi, gaeba flirti, gaemarTa wveulebebi, `CabRauWeboda qristianobas~, usaqmod mjdariyo komitetebSi da zedmeti gulTbiloba gamoeCina germaniis social-demokratiuli partiis wevrebis mimarT, raTa ar gamZafrebuliyo maTi kompleqsebi. henrieTe warmomedgina mxolod Seupovar qalad, romelic raRac iseTs Caidenda, rasac fantazias moklebuli realistebi snobizmad miiCnevdnen. mas SeeZlo romelime sazogadoebis prezidentisaTvis, bolo dros rom ase momravldnen, koqteili Caesxa sayeloSi anda kbilebdakreWili zeTvalTmaqcis mersedesisaTvis manqana daejaxebina. sxva ra unda ekeTebina, peizaJebis xatvas an keramikis sakaraqeebis gakeTebas Tu ar aswavlidnen. albaT, imasve igrZnobda, rasac me vgrZnob yvelgan, sadac cxovreba Cqefs _ uxilav kedels, romlis miRma fuli imisaTvis ki ar arsebobs, rom xarjo, aramed sxva daniSnuleba aqvs: xeli ar unda axlo da cifrebis saxiT skivrebSi Seinaxo. mamaCems gza davuTme. saxeze isev daasxa oflma da Semecoda. swrafad Sevvardi saerTo oTaxSi, magidaze dadebul WuWyian cxvirsaxocs xeli davavle da paltos jibeSi Cavude. dedaCemi yovelTviur TeTreuls rom gadaTvlida, Tu TvalSi rame daakldeboda, erT ambavs atexda xolme, moaxleebs qurdobas an daudevrobas abralebda. _ taqsi xom ar gamogiZaxo? _ vkiTxe mamas. _ ara, _ mipasuxa man, _ cotas fexiT gavivli, furmani sadguris maxloblad melodeba. man gverdi amiara. kari gavuRe, liftamde mivacile da Rilaks xeli davaWire. jibidan kidev erTxel amoviRe marka. gaSlil marcxena xelisgulze davide da davxede: mamaCemma zizRiT gaixeda gverdze da Tavi gaaqnia. megona, safules amoiRebda da
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ormocdaaT an as markas mainc damitovebda, magram tkivilma, keTilSobilebam da tragikuli situaciis Segnebam igi sublimaciis im donemde aiyvana, sadac fulze gafiqrebac ki amazrzenad miaCnda, xolo Cemi cdebi, kvlav Semexsenebina fuli _ mkrexelobad. roca liftis kari gavuRe, gadamexvia, Semdeg aqSutunda, CaixiTxiTa da miTxra: _ namdvilad yavis suni agdis, dasanania, siamovnebiT mogixarSavdi saucxoo yavas _ es marTla vici. xeli gamiSva, liftSi Sevida da sanam lifti daiZvreboda, swored maSin, roca Rilaks TiTs aWerda, mis eSmakur Rimils movkari Tvali. lifti daiZra, me ki videqi da cifrebis anTebaCaqrobas Tvals vadevnebdi. oTxi, sami, ori, erTi... da bolos Suqi gamoirTo. 16 roca binaSi Sevbrundi da kari davkete, mivxvdi, rom suleli var _ ratom ar movaduRebine yava da cota xans kidev ar davtove aq. gadamwyvet wamSi, swored maSin, roca yavas Semoitanda da amayad damisxamda, vetyodi, `aba, dayaWe fulebi~ anda `aba, amoalage fuli~. gadamwyvet wamSi yvelaferi primitiulad, barbarosulad xdeba. am dros amboben: `Tqven gergebaT naxevari poloneTi, Cven _ naxevari rumineTi, sileziis or mesameds isurvebT Tu naxevars? Tqven miiRebT oTx saministro savarZels, Cven Wapantransportis koncerns davepatronebiT~. sisulele Cavidine, rom Cemsa da mis ganwyobilebas avyevi da jibeze xeli ar gavakvrevine. Tavidanve fulze unda damewyo laparaki, unda memsjela am mkvdar, abstraqtul, borkildadebul fulze, mravali adamianisaTvis sikvdils an sicocxles rom udris. `sul fuli da fuli~, aRmoxdeboda xolme SeZrwunebul dedaCems, roca rveulisaTvis ocdaaT pfenigs vTxovdi. maradiuli fuli. maradiuli siyvaruli. samzareuloSi Sevedi, puri moviWeri, karaqi wavusvi, isev saerTo oTaxSi davbrundi da bela brozenis nomeri avkrife. imis imedi mqonda, rom Tavzardacemuli da akankalebuli
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mamaCemi Sin ki ara, sayvarelTan wavidoda, qali mas uTuod sawolSi Caawvenda, saTburs Caudebda da Taflian cxel rZes daalevinebda. dedaCems sazizRari Cveuleba hqonda: roca vinme SeuZlod iyo, maSinve WirTaTmenasa da nebisyofaze mohyveboda laparaks, am bolo dros ki `erTaderT samkurnalo saSualebad~ civi wyali miaCnia. _ brozeni gismenT, _ miTxra man da mesiamovna. cxvirSi araviTari suni rom ar meca. saocari xma hqonda _ Tbili, sasiamovno alti. _ Sniri gaxlavarT, hansi, gaxsovarT? _ maxsovxarT, _ miTxra man gulTbilad _ da ise... ise TanagigrZnobT... ver mivxvdi, risi Tqma undoda, mere gavige, roca laparaki ganagrZo. _ damijereT, yvela kritikosi briyvi, pativmoyvare da egoistia. me amovioxre. _ amis dajereba rom SemeZlos, cota ukeT vigrZnobdi Tavs. _ hoda, daijereT, daijereT, meti araferi gindaT. Tqven, albaT, ar iciT, rogor Svelis adamians Zlieri survili, rom raRac sjerodes. _ vTqvaT da, romelime kritikosma Semaqo, maSin raRa vqna? _ oh, _ gaecina mas, bgera `o~-Si mSvenieri koloratura JRerda, _ maSin unda daijero, rom kritikosi erTxel SemTxveviT patiosnebis gzas daadga da egoizmi daiviwya. me gamecina. ar vicodi, rogor mimemarTa _ bela dameZaxa Tu qalbatoni brozeni. Cven erTmaneTs TiTqmis ar vicnobdiT. iseTi cnobari ki, romelsac gadaSli da amoikiTxav, rogor unda mimarTo mamis sayvarels, jer ar arsebobs. bolos `frau belaze~ SevCerdi, Tumca es sasceno saxeli metismetad suleluri meCveneboda. _ frau bela, _ vuTxari me, _ Sav dReSi var. mama iyo CemTan, aTas raRacaze visaubreT, magram ver movaxerxe, kvlav fulze Camomegdo sityva, Tumca... vigrZeni, gawiTlda. me igi Zalian keTilsindisierad mimaCn173

da, mjeroda, rom mamaCemisadmi misi damokidebuleba `WeSmarit siyvaruls~ emyareboda da `fulTan dakavSirebul saqmeebze~ laparaki eCoTireboda. _ gTxovT, misminoT, _ ganvagrZe me, _ daiviwyeT yvelaferi, ramac axla TavSi gagielvaT. nu grcxveniaT. me mxolod imas gTxovT, roca mama TqvenTan Cemze Camoagdebs sityvas... iqneb, SeagnebinoT, rom usikvdilod mWirdeba fuli, naRdi fuli da Tanac axlave. usaxsrod davrCi. mismenT? _ diax, _ mipasuxa man ise Cumad, rom SiSma Semipyro, Semdeg momeCvena raRac srutunis magvari. _ Tqven, cxadia, cudi qali ggonivarT, hans, _ miTxra man, axla ukve aSkarad tiroda, _ sxeuliT movaWre arseba. Cvens droSi aseTi uamravia. Tqven unda mTvlideT aseT qalad, oh! _ rogor gekadrebaT, _ vupasuxe xmamaRla, _ me arasodes mimaCndiT aseT arsebad, marTla arasodes. meSinoda sakuTar da mamaCemis grZnobebze ar daewyo laparaki. zluqunis mixedviT, igi sakmaod sentimentaluri Canda. arc is iyo gamoricxuli, rom marize Camoagdebda sityvas. _ marTals geubnebiT, _ ganvagrZe me arc ise mtkiced, radgan saeWvod momeCvena, sxeuliT movaWre qalebi rom zizRiT moixsenia, _ marTals geubnebiT, yovelTvis darwmunebuli viyavi Tqvens keTilganwyobaSi da gulSi cudi arasodes araferi gamivlia. _ da es marTlac ase iyo. _ garda amisa, _ ganvagrZe me da siamovnebiT mivmarTavdi kidev erTxel saxeliT, magram es saSineli saxeli bela ver amovRerRe, _ garda amisa, me TiTqmis ocdaaTi wlis var. mismenT? _ diax, _ igi iq, godesbergSi, Tavis vilaSi ise oxravda da zluqunebda, TiTqos saaRsareboSi iyo muxlmoyrili. _ Tqven mxolod is STaagoneT, rom usaSvelod mWirdeba fuli. _ Cemi azriT, _ miTxra uxalisod, _ ar ivargebs am sakiTxze pirdapir davelaparako... yvelaferi, rac mis ojaxs exeba... gesmiT, ras vambob, CvenTvis tabua... magram arsebobs sxva gza. xma ar amomiRia. qali aRar zluqunebda, Cumad qsutunebda mxolod.
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_ drodadro igi fuls maZlevs gaWirvebuli kolegebis dasaxmareblad, _ miTxra man, _ am fuls me TviTon vanawileb da igi saqmeSi ar ereva. rogor fiqrobT, marTebuli xom ar iqneboda, es mcire Tanxa gadmogceT, rogorc gaWirvebul kolegas? _ me marTlac gaWirvebuli kolega var da ara marto amJamad, sul mcire naxevari wliT mainc. miTxariT, geTayva, ras gulisxmobT mcire TanxaSi? man Caaxvela, kidev erTxel aRmoxda `o~, magram amas koloraturasTan saerTo aRaraferi hqonda, da miTxra: _ am fuls, Cveulebriv, viyenebT konkretuli gaWirvebis SemTxvevaSi, roca vinme kvdeba, avad xdeba an qals bavSvi uCndeba. me imis Tqma minda, rom saqme exeba ara xangrZliv daxmarebas, aramed erTgvar xelis gamarTvas. _ mainc ramdenia es Tanxa? _ vkiTxe me. pasuxi maSinve ar gaucia da vcade warmomedgina, rogori SeiZleboda yofiliyo imwams. bela brozeni xuTi wlis winaT vnaxe pirvelad, roca marim manamde ar moisvena, sanam operaSi ar SemaTria. frau brozeni mReroda grafis mier Secdenili glexi gogonas partias da me gamaoca mamaCemis gemovnebam. bela saSualo tanis, sakmaod janiani qera qali aRmoCnda, mkerdi ise uRelavda, rogorc jer ars. xan qoxis kedels, xan forans miyrdnobili, bolos ki fiwalze dayrdnobili bela lamazi, Zlieri xmiT mReroda da yvelaze ukeT umartives sulier gancdebs gamoxatavda. _ alo, _ viyvire me, _ alo! _ o, _ aRmoxda mas. amjerad bgera isev koloraturulad JRerda, magram odnav sustad. _ Tqven isev pirdapir damisviT kiTxva. _ iseT dReSi var, esRa damrCenia, _ vuTxari me da SiSma Semipyro. vicodi, rac ufro didxans dumda, miT ufro mcire Tanxas daasaxelebda. _ ra gaewyoba, _ miTxra man bolos, _ Tanxa aTidan daaxloebiT ocdaaT markamde meryeobs. _ vTqvaT da romelime Tqveni kolega uaRresad mZime mdgomareobaSi aRmoCnda, magaliTad, katastrofaSi moyva da ramde175

nime Tvis ganmavlobaSi as-asi marka sWirdeba fuladi daxmarebis saxiT? _ Cemo kargo, _ miTxra man Cumad, _ nuTu ggoniaT, rom tyuils vikadreb? _ ara, _ vupasuxe me, _ magram me marTla momivida marcxi da, bolos da bolos, gana Cven kolegebi ara varT, msaxiobebi? _ Sevecdebi, _ miTxra man, _ magram ara mgonia, ankess wamoegos. _ rao? _ viyvire me. _ ar vici, SevZleb Tu ara, ise davusuraTo saqme, rom damijeros. me arc ise mdidari fantazia maqvs. amis Tqma saWiro ar iyo. me ukve vfiqrobdi, igi yvelaze briyvi dedakacia, visTanac ki odesme saqme mqonia-meTqi. _ ra moxdeba, _ vuTxari me, _ scadoT da aqaur TeatrSi angaJementi momiwyoT. cxadia, meorexarisxovan rolebs vgulisxmob, patara, saxasiaTo rolebs kargad vasruleb. _ ara, ara, Zvirfaso hans, _ mipasuxa man, _ me isedac cudad vgrZnob Tavs imis gamo, rom am intriganul TamaSSi vebmebi. _ keTili, _ vupasuxe me, _ bolos isic minda giTxraT, rom sul mcire Tanxazec ar vityodi uars. naxvamdis da didi madloba. sanam ramis Tqmas moaxerxebda, yurmili davkide. gumaniT vgrZnobdi, am wyarodan araferi gamodindeboda. qali uaRresad briyvi aRmoCnda. Cemi undobloba gamoiwvia kilom, roca Tqva `ankess wamoegos~. ratom iyo SeuZlebeli `gaWirvebuli kolegebisaTvis gaRebuli Tanxa~ jibeSi Caedo. mamaCemi Semecoda. me misTvis lamaz da inteligent sayvarels vinatrebdi. kvlav mwydeboda guli, rom yava ar movaduRebine. es briyvi dedakaci, albaT, iRimeboda da malulad Tavs aqnevda maswavlebeliviT, _ aqaoda, xeli SemiSaleo _ roca mama yavis mosaxarSad mis samzareuloSi gadioda, Semdeg ki farisevlurad saxegabrwyinebuli yavas ise uqebda, rogorc ZaRls Seaqeben qvis motanisaTvis. gacofebuli movSordi telefons, fanjarasTan mivedi, gamovaRe da quCaSi gadavixede. SemeSinda, vaiTu, ise gamiWirdes, rom erT mSvenier dRes zo176

mervilds mivadge daxmarebisaTvis. uecrad jibidan markiani amoviRe, quCaSi gadavagde da imwamsve vinane. Tvali gavayole, magram veRar davinaxe. mxolod momeCvena, TiTqos gavigone, rogor daeca Cavlili tramvais saxuravze. magididan buterbrodi aviRe da, sanam quCaSi viyurebodi, SevWame. rvas aRaraferi aklda, TiTqmis ori saaTi viyavi bonSi, eqvs egreT wodebul megobars davureke, dedasa da mamas velaparake da jibeSi araTu meti, erTi markiT naklebi medo imasTan SedarebiT, rac Camosvlisas mebada. siamovnebiT Cavirbendi dabla da Cems markas quCaSi davuwyebdi Zebnas, magram dro cxris naxevrisken miiwevda da leos yovel wams SeeZlo daereka an mosuliyo. maris ra uWirda, romSi iyo, Tavisi eklesiis wiaRSi da axla, albaT, imaze fiqrobda, ra Caecva papTan audienciis dros. ciupfneri Jaklin kenedis suraTs uSovida, espanur mantiliasa da ridesac aucileblad uyidda, radgan, kargad Tu CavukvirdebiT, amJamad mari germanuli kaTolicizmis erTgvari `First Lady~ iyo. gadavwyvite mec gavmgzavrebuliyavi romSi da papisaTvis audiencia meTxova. albaT, papsac scxia raRac beberi, brZeni klounis da, bolos da bolos, arlekinis saxec bergamoSi Caisaxa. amis dadastureba SeuZlia geneholmsac. man xom yvelaferi icis. paps avuxsnidi, Cemi da maris colqmroba imitom CaiSala, rom oficialurad xelmowerilni ar viyaviT, da vTxovdi, henrih merves erTgvar antipodad miveCnie: henrih merve poligami da morwmune kaci iyo, me ki monogami da urwmuno. vuambobdi, ra qedmaRalni da uxamsni arian germanuli kaTolicizmis `mesveurebi~ da vurCevdi, Tavi ar moetyuebina. vuCvenebdi ramdenime nomers, lamaz, msubuq scenebs, rogoricaa `skolaSi wasvla da Sin dabruneba~, `kardinals~ ki _ ara. aman SeiZleba guli atkinos, erT dros xom TviTonac kardinali iyo. yvela-yvela da, swored misTvis ar mindoda dameSavebina rame. mudam sakuTari fantaziis msxverpli vxdebi. cxadad warmovidgine papTan audiencia: ai, ukve muxlmodrekili vdgavar
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mis win da vTxov, makurTxos urwmuno kaci. karTan gaSeSebuli Sveicarieli gvardieli dgas, xolo iqve romeliRac monsiniori Semwynareblurad, magram mruded iRimeba. yvelaferi es ise naTlad damidga Tvalwin, rom marTlac davijere, TiTqos ukve viyavi papTan. vicodi, cdunebas ver gavuZlebdi da leos vuambobdi, papis sanaxavad gavemgzavre da audiencia mqonda masTanmeTqi. im wuTSi marTlac papTan viyavi, vxedavdi mis Rimils, vismendi mis sasiamovno, glexur xmas, vuambobdi, rogor gaxda Wkuasusti bergamoeli arlekini. magram leos aseTi xumroba ar uyvarda, mudam matyuaras meZaxda, cofdeboda, roca Sexvedris dros vkiTxavdi: _ gaxsovs, rogor gadavxerxeT erTad mori? _ mori Cven erTad ar gadagvixerxavs, _ yviroda igi. leo marTals ambobda, magram misi simarTle Cirad ar Rirda. igi eqvsi-Svidi wlisa iqneboda, me ki rvisa Tu cxris, roca man sajiniboSi Robis monarCeni mori ipova, iqve Jangmokidebuli xerxic gamoCxrika da mTxova, mori erTad gadavxerxoTo. me vkiTxe, ra saWiroa aseTi usargeblo moris gadaxerxva-meTqi. mizezi ver damisaxela, ubralod, xerxva mounda, rac me srul uazrobad momeCvena. leo mTeli naxevari saaTi tiroda. me mxolod didi xnis, TiTqmis aTi wlis Semdeg _ pater vunibaldis germanuli enis gakveTilze, roca lesings gavdiodiT _ yovelgvari asociaciis gareSe mivxvdi, Tu ras mTxovda leo: undoda exerxa, im wuTSi sxva araferi undoda ise, rogorc CemTan erTad xerxva. yvelafer amas aTi wlis Semdeg mivxvdi da ise Zalumad ganvicade misi sixaruli, mouTmenloba, mRelvareba, rom Sua gakveTilze xelebi ise avamoZrave, TiTqos marTlac vxerxavdi. Tvalwin medga leos bavSvuri, gabrwyinebuli saxe. Jangmokidebul xerxs rigrigobiT veqaCebodiT da ase grZeldeboda manamde, sanam pater vunibaldma TmaSi ar wamavlo xeli da `gons ar momiyvana~. mas Semdeg mgonia, TiTqos me da leom marTla gadavxerxeT mori, magram leos amis gageba ar SeuZlia. igi realistia da dRes aRar esmis, rom Tu rame agekviata, Tundac suleluri, aucileblad unda gaakeTo. raRac wamieri survilebi deda178

sac ki uCndeboda, magaliTad, buxris win kartis TamaSi, samzareuloSi Sesvla da vaSlis yvavilis Cais sakuTari xeliT dasxma. uecrad moeprianeboda lamaz, gaprialebul, wiTeli xis magidasTan dajdoma, kartis TamaSi, bednieri ojaxis diasaxlisoba, magram yovelTvis, roca mas amgvari ram moenatreboda, arc erT Cvengans ar hqonda amis xalisi. maSin atydeboda erTi ambavi, dedaCemi manWva-grexiT gvisayvedurebda, Cemi ar gesmiTo, Semdeg ki Cvengan morCilebas moiTxovda, meoTxe mcnebas iSveliebda. bolos rwmundeboda, rom Tu Svilebi mxolod morCilebis grZnobis karnaxiT geTamaSebian karts, veraferi garTobaa, da atirebuli Tavis oTaxSi midioda. zogjer cdilobda moveqrTameT, gvpirdeboda `gansakuTrebiT~ gemriel saWmels an sasmels, bolos ki isev morigi uxvcremliani saRamo dgeboda. ramdeni aseTi saRamo gagvitarebia dedas wyalobiT. mas ar esmoda, ratom veubnebodiT ase TavgamodebiT kartis TamaSze uars _ kartSi jer kidev eria gulis Svidiani da yoveli TamaSi henrieTes gvagonebda. magram pirSi amas aravin eubneboda. mogvianebiT, roca vigonebdi mis amao cdebs, bednieri ojaxis garemocvaSi mjdariyo agizgizebul buxarTan, warmovidgendi, TiTqos marto veTamaSebodi karts. Tumca yovelgvari kartis TamaSi, roca masSi mxolod ori monawileobs, mosawyenia. me marTla veTamaSebodi dedaCems `samocdaeqvss~ da `omobanas~, vsvamdi vaSlis yvavilis Cais, Tanac Taflians, dedaCemi ki am dros xumrobiT TiTs miqnevda da sigarets mTavazobda, kedlis miRma leo etiudebs ukravda da am dros saxlSi yvelam, moaxleebmac ki icodnen, rom mamaCemi `im qalTan~ wavida. etyoba, marim viRacisgan gaigo, amgvari `tyuilebis~ mogoneba rom memarjveba, da roca rames vuyvebodi, mudam eWvis TvaliT miyurebda. magram osnabriuqSi is biWi namdvilad davinaxe fanjridan. zogjer piriqiTac memarTeba: is, rac namdvilad ganvicade, aranamdvili, ararealuri mgonia. axla arafriT ar mjera, rom odesRac kiolnidan bonSi Cavedi da maris jgufel qaliSvilebs qalwul mariamze vesaubre. yvelaferi, rasac sxva adamianebi realobad Tvlian, me fiqciad meCveneba.
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17 sabolood Caviqnie xeli qvemoT, mtverSi gagorebul erTmarkianze, fanjaras movcildi da kidev erTi buterbrodis gasakeTeblad samzareuloSi gavedi. sanovage cotaRa damrCa: kidev erTi qila lobio, erTi qila qliavi (qliavs ver vitan, magram monikam es saidan unda icodes), naxevari puri, naxevari boTli rZe, daaxloebiT meoTxedi girvanqa yava, xuTi kvercxi, sami naWeri Ronis qoni da erTi tubi mdogvi. saerTo oTaxis magidaze dagdebul kolofSi oTxi sigaretiRa iyo. Tavs Zalze cudad vgrZnobdi, aRar mqonda imis imedi, rom kvlav SevZlebdi varjiSs. muxli gamisivda, Sarvali lamis miWerda, Tavis ganuwyveteli, mburRavi tkivili TiTqmis zemiwieri gaxda, sulSi uSavesma sibnelem daisadgura. garda amisa, mawuxebda `xorcieli Jini~, mari ki romSi iyo. umisod miWirda, menatreboda misi kani, mindoda, mkerdze misi xelebi megrZno. rogorc erTxel zomervildma Tqva, mec maqvs `qmediTi da WeSmariti damokidebuleba fizikuri silamazisadmi~. msiamovnebs, roca Cem irgvliv lamazi qalebi trialeben, magaliTad, iseTebi, rogoric Cemi mezobeli frau grebelsia, magram am qalebisadmi araviTar `xorciel Jins~ ar vgrZnob. amis gamo ki bevri maTgani nawyeni rCeba, Tumca maT mimarT rom amgvari ram megrZno da Cemi survilis dakmayofileba momeTxova, albaT, policias dauZaxebdnen. rTuli da saSinelia `xorcieli Jini~, aramonogami mamakacebisaTvis es, albaT, mudmivi wamebaaa, CemisTana monogamebisaTvis ki _ faruli uzrdelobis mudmivi wyaro, radgan qalebi, umetes SemTxvevaSi, Seuracxyofilni rCebian, Tu ar grZnoben imas, rasac maT enaze erosi hqvia. frau bloTertic ki, wesieri da RvTismosavi qali, mudam cotaTi Seuracxyofilad grZnobda Tavs. zojer im avxorci adamianebisac ki mesmis, romlebzedac amdens weren gazeTebSi. roca warmovidgen, rom arsebobs raRac iseTi, rasac `colqmruli movaleoba~ hqvia, SiSi mipyrobs. amazrzeni unda iyos colqmroba, roca qals saxelmwifo da eklesia aiZulebs, `is saqme~ xelSekrulebis Tanaxmad akeTos. ar SeiZleba adamiani iZulebiT gaxado gulmowyale. Sevecde180

bi am sakiTxze romis paps velaparako, mas, albaT, araswor informacias awvdian. kidev erTi buterbrodi gavikeTe, winkarSi gavedi da paltos jibidan saRamos gazeTebi amoviRe, kiolnSi matareblis fanjridan rom viyide. zogjer saRamos gazeTi Svebas mgvris, iseve macarielebs, rogorc televizoris yureba. gazeTi gadavfurcle da manamde vaTvalierebdi msxvili asoebiT awyobil saTaurebs, sanam ar wavawydi SeniSvnas, romelmac sicili momgvara. `federaluri respublikis winaSe damsaxurebisaTvis doqtori herberT qaliki daajildoes `jvris ordeniT~. qaliki swored is vaJbatoni gaxldaT, romelmac damasmina, dezertiri miwoda da gasamarTlebis dros simkacres, ulmobel simkacres moiTxovda. mas daebada maSin genialuri azri, mterTan saboloo SebrZolebisaTvis obolTa TavSesafris mobilizacia moexdinaT. me vicodi, rom axla igi indauriviT gafxorili `didi kaci~ iyo. gazeTSi ewera: jvris ordeniT daajildoes `axalgazrdebs Soris demokratiuli ideebis gavrcelebisaTvis~. erTxel, ori wlis win, Sin dampatiJa, Serigeba undoda. rogor unda mepatiebina misTvis, rom oboli biWi, georgi, tanksawinaaRmdego yumbaris tyorcnaSi varjiSis dros sasikvdilod daiWra, anda is, aTi wlis biWs rom dezertiroba damabrala da simkacris, ulmobeli simkacris gamoCenas moiTxovda? magram mari marwmunebda, ar SeiZleba uari uTxra miwvevaze im kacs, visi mizanic Serigebaao. Cven yvavilebi viyideT da qaliks vestumreT. igi aRmoCnda mSvenieri vilis mflobeli TiTqmis zed eifelze, hyavda lamazi coli da bavSvi, romelsac amayad `erT bavSvebs~ eZaxdnen. misi colis silamaze imgvari iyo, rom ver gaigebdi, cocxali adamiani iyo Tu momarTuli Tojina. mTeli im xnis ganmavlobaSi, rac mis gverdiT vijeqi, ar masvenebda survili, misTvis mklavebSi, mxrebSi an fexebSi wamevlo xeli, raTa davrwmunebuliyavi, rom Tojina ar iyo. misi monawileoba saubarSi mxolod ori fraziT ganisazRvreboda: `o, ra mSvenieria~ da `o, ra sisaZaglea~. Tavidan mosawyeni qali momeCvena, Semdeg ki davinteresdi da ise vuyvebo181

di aTasgvar ambavs, rogorc avtomatSi yrian fuls _ mindoda gamego, ra reaqcia eqneboda. roca vauwye, es-esaa bebia gardamecvala-meTqi, rac sruliad ar Seefereboda simarTles, radgan bebia Tormeti wlis win gardaicvala, man wamoiZaxa: `o, ra sisaZaglea~. Cemi azriT, roca adamiani kvdeba, bevr sisuleles amboben, magram `o, ra sisaZaglea~ aravis dascdenia. Semdeg movuyevi, viRac humelos (romelic saerTod ar arsebobda da imisaTvis movigone saswrafod, rom avtomatSi rame dadebiTi CameSva) sapatio doqtoris xarisxi mianiWes-meTqi. man wamoiZaxa: `o, ra mSvenieria!~, xolo roca vuambe, Cemma Zmam, leom, rjuli Seicvala-meTqi, erT wams Seyoymanda. me es yoymani sicocxlis niSanwylad momeCvena, magram man metismetad didi, Tojinas carieli TvalebiT Semomxeda da cdilobda mimxvdariyo, piradad me rogor kategorias vakuTvnebdi am ambavs. mere ki Tqva: `sisaZaglea, ara?~. is mainc movaxerxe, rom gamoTqmis cotaTi gansxvavebuli varianti davacdenine, vurCie, `o, ra~ gamoetovebina da marto `mSvenieria~ da `sisaZaglea~ eTqva. Caikiskisa, kidev gadmomiRo satacuri da mxolod amis Semdeg Tqva: `o, ra mSvenieria~. im saRamos miwuruls is `erTi bavSvebic~ gavicaniT, maTi xuTi wlis lawiraki. misTvis SeiZleboda egreve daevloT xeli da televiziis sareklamo gadacemebSi gamoeyvanaT, rogorc bavSvi. biWunam kbilis pastis sareklamo RimiliT gaiRima da Tqva: `Rame mSvidobisa, mamiko, Rame mSvidobisa, dediko~, Semdeg maris daukra Tavi, bolos ki me. gamikvirda, aqamde rogor ver aRmoaCina es biWi televiziis sareklamo ganyofilebam. mogvianebiT, roca buxarTan yavasa da koniaks SeveqceodiT, herberTma laparaki gaaba im diad droze, Cven rom vcxovrobT, Semdeg Sampanuri moitana, paTetikurad momixada bodiSi, muxlic ki moiyara Cem winaSe da mTxova, `ueklesiod Semendo misTvis codvebi~. mzad viyavi panCuri amomekra, magram nacvlad amisa, magididan yvelis dasaWreli dana aviRe da sazeimod vakurTxe demokratad. `o, ra mSvenieria!~ _ wamoiZaxa misma colma. roca gulaCuyebuli herberTi dajda, me mTeli moxseneba wavikiTxe `ebrael iankebze~.
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_ didxans egonaT, _ vTqvi me, _ rom Cemi gvari Sniri warmodgeba sityvisagan `Snorren~1, magram bolos damtkicda, rom mas araferi aqvs saerTo am sityvasTan. is warmoiSva gvarisagan Snideri, romlis Ziri aris sityva `Snaider~2. ase rom, me arc ebraeli var da arc ianki, magram... _ uecrad herberTs sila gavawani, radgan gamaxsenda, rogor mosTxova erT Cvens skolis amxanags, gioc buxels, cnoba ariuli warmoSobis Sesaxeb. gioci mZime dReSi Cavarda. dedamisi samxreT italiis romeliRac soflidan iyo da iqidan raime cnobis miReba, rac cotaTi mainc daasabuTebda dedamisis ariul warmoSobas, SeuZlebeli aRmoCnda. is sofeli, sadac giocis deda daibada, am dros ukve ebraeli iankebis xelSi iyo. gioci da dedamisi ramdenime kvira saSinel dReSi iyvnen, maT sicocxles safrTxe emuqreboda, sanam giocis maswavlebels azrad ar mouvida, biWi bonis universitetis rasizmis erT-erT specialists Seemowmebina da daskvna daewera. profesorma daadgina, rom gioci `arielia~, `wminda wylis arieli~. herberT qalikma raRac sisulele moCmaxa, yvela italieli moRalateao, da giocs omis damTavrebamde erTi mSvidi wuTi aRar hqonia. yvelaferi es maSin gamaxsenda, roca vcade `ebraeli iankebis~ Sesaxeb moxseneba wamekiTxa. herberTs erTi gvariani sila gavawani, Sampanuris Wiqa buxarSi Sevagde, zed yvelis saWreli danac mivayole, maris mklavSi xeli Cavavle da iqidan wamovaTrie. zeviT, eifelze, taqsi ver viSoveT da avtobusis gaCerebamde sakmaod didi manZili fexiT gaviareT. mari tiroda da mTeli am xnis ganmavlobaSi mimtkicebda, araqristianulad da araadamianurad moiqecio. me vupasuxe, qristiani ara var da Cemi saaRsarebo jer Ria ar aris-meTqi. marim mkiTxa, nuTu eWvi gepareba, rom herberTi axla sxva kaci gaxda, demokratiao? _ ara, ara, _ vupasuxe me, _ sruliad ar mepareba eWvi, piriqiT; ubralod, ar miyvars es kaci da arc arasodes Semiyvardeba.
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Schnorren (germ.)

_ maTxovroba. Schneider (germ.) _ mkeravi.


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telefonis wigni gadavSale da qalikis nomeri movZebne. iseT gunebaze viyavi, rom swored masTan mindoda telefoniT mesaubra. gamaxsenda, mogvianebiT kidev erTxel Sevxvdi Cvens saxlSi, Jurfiqsze. man mudariT Semomxeda da Tavis gadaaqngadmoaqnia, radgan am dros erT rabins `ebraelTa inteleqtze~ elaparakeboda. rabini Semecoda. Zlier moxucebuli iyo da TeTri wveri da keTili gamometyveleba hqonda. misma gulubryvilobam SemaSfoTa. cxadia, herberTi yvelas, visac ki gaicnobda, arwmunebda, nacisti da antisemiti viyavi, magram `istoriam Tvali amixilao~. arada, amerikelebis bonSi Semosvlamde erTi dRiT adre, Tavis biWebs parkSi wvrTnida da eubneboda: `rogorc ki pirvel ebrael Rors dainaxavT, maSinve esroleT xelyumbara~. dedaCemis Jurfiqsze yvelaze metad samSobloSi dabrunebuli emigrantebis gulubryviloba maRelvebda. sayovelTao monanieba da demokratiis saqveynod aRiareba maT ise uCuyebda guls, rom daZmobilebasa da gulSi Cakvras bolo ar uCanda. maT ar esmodaT, ukeTurobis saidumloeba rom wvrilmanebSia Caqsovili. advilze advilia moinanio raRac didi politikuri Secdoma, colqmruli Ralati, mkvleloba, antisemitizmi, magram vin Seundobs adamians, vin erkveva wvrilmanebSi? ra damaviwyebs imas, rogor Sexedes briulma da herberT qalikma mamaCems, roca mxarze xeli damado; rogor akakunebda gacofebuli qaliki mokakul TiTebs magidaze, miyurebda mkvdari TvalebiT da gaiZaxoda: `simkacre, ulmobeli simkacrea saWiro~; anda rogor swvda sayeloSi gioc buxels, miuxedavad maswavleblis Cumi protestisa, mTeli klasis win daayena da wamoiZaxa: `aba, SexedeT, riT ar aris ebraeli?~ Cems mexsierebaSi uamravi amgvari wami, uamravi detali da wvrilmani aRibeWda... da herberTs Tvalebi ar Sescvlia. SemeSinda, roca davinaxe, rogor idga igi moxuci, cota gamoCerCetebuli, mSvidobianad ganwyobili rabinis gverdiT, rogor umaspinZldeboda koqteiliT da ebraelTa inteleqtze elaparakeboda. emigrantebma arc is ician, rom frontze nacistebs iSviaTad gzavnidnen da, amgvarad, iRupebodnen ara isini, ara184

med sxvebi, iseTebi, rogoric iyo huberT qnipsi, vinekenebis mezobel saxlSi rom cxovrobda, da xabazis Svili giunTer qremeri. Tumca isini hitleriugendis xelmZRvanelebi iyvnen, mainc gagzavnes im frontze, radgan `politikuri alRo akldaT~, mTel im binZur TvalTvalSi ar monawileobdnen. qaliks arasodes gagzavnidnen frontze, radgan politikuri alRo hqonda, iseve, rogorc dRes aqvs. dabadebiTve swori alRo dahyva. yvelaferi sul sxvagvarad xdeboda, vidre emigrantebs hgoniaT. maT mxolod amgvari kategoriebiT SeuZliaT azrovneba: damnaSave _ udanaSaulo, nacisti _ aranacisti. gaulaiTeri1 qirenhani zogjer maris mamis duqanSi Sedioda, sigaretis kolofs daukiTxavad iRebda yuTidan, arc talons tovebda da arc fuls, Semdeg maris mamis cxvirwin, daxlze jdeboda da eubneboda: _ martin, ra moxdeba, patara, arc ise saSinel sakoncentracio banakSi rom gikra Tavi? maris mama upasuxebda: _ Rori Rorobas ver moiSlis, Sen ki yovelTvis Rori iyavi. isini erTmaneTs eqvsi wlis asakidan icnobdnen. gacofebuli qirenhani afrTxilebda: _ Tavs nu gadixar, martin, metismetad Sors nu Setopav. maris mama eubneboda: _ Tu damWirda, ufro Sorsac Sevtopav, aba, gaeTrie aqedan! _ vecdebi, kargSi ki ara, yvelaze saSinel sakoncentracio banakSi amogayofino Tavi. ase davobdnen dausruleblad. maris mamas usaTuod daiWerdnen, gaulaiTers raRac gaugebari mizezis gamo misTvis `mfarveli xeli~ rom ar gadaefarebina. magram yvelas rodi afarebda am mfarvel xels. man arc tyaviT movaWre marqsi daicva da arc komunisti krupe. orive mokles. dRes yofili gaulaiTeri mSvenivrad cxovrobs, samSeneblo masalebis maRazia aqvs gaxsnili. erTxel qirenhani maris Sexvda da uTxra: sawuwuno araferi maqvso.
gaulaiTeri (Gauleiter _ germ.) _ olqis nacisti xelmZRvaneli faSistur germaniaSi.
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_ ra saSineli iyo nacistebis batonobis xana, iqidanac Cans, rom sicocxles unda vumadlode iseT Rors, rogoric yofili gaulaiTeria. Tan es werilobiTac unda davadasturo, _ gveubneboda xSirad maris mama. amasobaSi qalikis telefonis nomeri vipove, magram vyoymanobdi, damereka Tu ara. gamaxsenda, rom xval dedaCems Jurfiqsi aqvs, SemeZlo Sin mivsuliyavi, jibeebi Cemi mSoblebis fuliT nayidi sigaretebiTa da mariliani nuSiT gamometena, parkSi Cayrili zeTisxili da yvelis kverebi momemaragebina, Semdeg stumrebisaTvis qudiT xelSi Camomevlo da `ojaxis gaWirvebuli wevrisaTvis~ fuli Semegrovebina. erTxel, TxuTmeti wlisam, amgvari ram ukve gavakeTe. `gansakuTrebuli saWiroebisaTvis~ fuli vimaTxovre da as markaze meti Sevagrove. es fuli TviTon movixmare yovelgvari sindisis qenjnis gareSe da, Tu xval `ojaxis gaWirvebuli wevrisaTvis~ fuls Sevagroveb, es ar iqneba tyuili: me marTlac var ojaxis gaWirvebuli wevri. wamosvlis win ki samzareuloSi Seval, anas mkerdze avtirdebi da Zexvis narCenebs gamovtyueb. dedaCemis Jurfiqsze Tavmoyrili idiotebi Cems saqciels didebul xumrobad miiCnevdnen. dedaCemic iZulebuli iqneba, naZaladevi RimiliT Cems saqciels xumrobis xasiaTi mianiWos da aravis ecodineba, rom es momakvdineblad seriozuli simarTlea. im xalxs araferi esmis. TiToeulma maTganma icis, rom klouni melanqoliki unda iyos, Torem kargi klouni ver iqneba. magram ar ician, rom misTvis melanqolia momakvdineblad seriozuli ram aris. dedaCemis Jurfiqsze Sevxvdebi yvelas: zomervilds da qaliks, liberalebs da socialdemokratebs, eqvs sxvadasxva juris prezidents da atomuri yumbaris mowinaaRmdegeebsac ki (erTxel dedaCemi sami dRe monawileobda antiatomur moZraobaSi, magram roca romeliRac firmis prezidentma ganumarta, Tanamimdevruli antiatomuri moZraoba aqciebis radikalur dacemas gamoiwvevso, maSinve miirbina telefonTan da komitets daureka, moZraobas `veTiSebio~). bolos, roca yvelas qudiT xelSi Camovuvli, qaliks sajarod silas gavawnav, zomervilds gamovlanZRav, mliqvnel
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mRvdels vuwodeb, xolo kaTolikeTa centraluri kavSiris iq myof warmomadgenlebs imaSi davadanaSauleb, rom garyvnilebasa da mruSobas uwyoben xels. diskos TiTi movacile da qaliks aRar davureke. misTvis mxolod is mindoda mekiTxa, am xnis ganmavlobaSi warsuli Tu moinela, isev daaxloebulia Tu ara xelisuflebasTan da xom ar SeuZlia gamanaTlos ebraelTa inteleqtis sakiTxSi. erTxel qalikma hitleriugendis saRamoze moxseneba waikiTxa Temaze: `makiaveli, anu xelisuflebasTan daaxloebis cda~. misi moxsenebidan veraferi gavige, garda imisa, rom igi aSkarad emxroboda xelisuflebas da es pirdapir ganacxada. hitleriugendis mesveurT saxeze SeetyoT, rom man gadaamlaSa. makiavelize TiTqmis araferi uTqvams, laparakobda mxolod sakuTar Tavze, anu qalikze, da sxva xelmZRvanelebs saxeze eweraT, rom misi moxseneba sajarod gamotanil utifrobad miaCndaT. xom arseboben iseTi vaJbatonebi, romelTa Sesaxeb gazeTebi weren, namusgarecxilebio. qaliki pirwavardnili namusgarecxili politikosi iyo da sadac unda gamosuliyo, yvela sircxviliT iwvoda. xvalindeli Jurfiqsi sixaruls mgvrida. Cemi mSoblebis qonebidan cota ram mec mxvdeboda wilad: zeTisxili, mariliani nuSi, sigaretebi... sigarebis ramdenime Sekvrasac wamoviReb da Semdeg fasdaklebiT gavyidi, qaliks mkerdidan ordens Camovglej da silas gavawnav. masTan SedarebiT dedaCemic ki adamianad meCveneba. roca Cemi mSoblebis sagarderoboSi ukanasknelad Sevxvdi, naRvlianad Semomxeda da miTxra: _ yvela adamians aqvs erTi Sansi. qristianebi amas Sendobas uwodeben. pasuxi ar gamicia. me xom qristiani ara var. gamaxsenda, im moxsenebaSi qaliki `sisastikis erotikulobasa~ da `seqsualur makiavelizmze~ rom laparakobda. roca mis seqsualur makiavelizmze vfiqrobdi, iseve mecodebodnen meZavebi, visTanac igi dadioda, rogorc colebi, romlebic xelSekrulebis Tanaxmad iZulebulni arian, romelime nadirs ekuTvnodnen. vfiqrobdi uamrav lamaz ymawvilqalze, romelTac an fulis gamo
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unda ekeTebinaT `is saqme~ qalikisTana vaJbatonebTan, anda ufulod da uxalisod _ sakuTar meuRleebTan. 18 imis magivrad, rom qalikis nomeri amekrifa, isev im dawesebulebaSi davreke, sadac leo cxovrobs. odesme xom unda daemTavrebinaT vaxSami, STaenTqaT TavianTi vnebebis damTrgunveli salaTebi. gamixarda, isev im tipma rom mipasuxa, berikaci axla sigaras eweoda da kombostos suni ise mZafrad aRar igrZnoboda. _ Sniri gaxlavarT, _ vuTxari me, _ gaxsovarT? _ ra Tqma unda, _ mipasuxa man, _ imedi maqvs, Cemi sityvebi pirdapiri mniSvnelobiT ar gaigeT da Tqveni avgustine ar dawviT. _ rogor ara, _ vupasuxe me, _ zustad ase moviqeci, wigni davxie da furcel-furcel cecxls miveci. erT wuTs xma ar amouRia. _ xumrobT, _ miTxra xrinwiani xmiT. _ sruliadac ara, _ vuTxari me, _ aseT saqmeSi Tanamimdevrobas viCen. _ RmerTo Cemo, nuTu Tqven marTlac naTlad dainaxeT dialeqtikuri sawyisebi Cems naTqvamSi? _ vera, ver davinaxe. me ubralo, patiosani kaci var. ras Svreba Cemi Zma? _ vkiTxe me, _ rodis inebeben batonebi vaxSmis damTavrebas? _ es wuTia maT Carozi miarTves, _ miTxra man, _ didxans aRar gagrZeldeba. _ ras miirTmeven? _ vkiTxe me. _ Carozad? _ diax. _ amis Tqmis ufleba ara maqvs, magram Tqven getyviT: qliavis kompots naRebiT. kargi ramaa, giyvarT qliavi? _ ara, _ vupasuxe me, _ qliavis mimarT yovlad gaugebari da dauZleveli zizRi maqvs. _ unda waikiTxoT hobereris Sroma idiosinkraziis Sesaxeb.
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yvelaferi dakavSirebulia adreul, xSirad dabadebamde gancdebTan, sainteresoa. hobererma rvaasi SemTxveva zustad gamoikvlia. melanqoliki brZandebiT. _ Tqven ra iciT? _ xmaze getyobaT. iloceT da abazana miiReT. _ abazana ukve miviRe, locva ki ar SemiZlia, _ vupasuxe me. _ samwuxaroa, _ miTxra man. _ axal avgustines SemogwiravT an kierkegors. _ kierkegori jerjerobiT maqvs, _ vuTxari me, _ SegiZliaT Cems Zmas kidev erTi ram gadasceT? _ siamovnebiT, _ mipasuxa man. _ uTxariT, fuli wamomiRos, ramdensac iSovis. man raRac Caiburtyuna, Semdeg ki xmamaRla miTxra: _ mxolod CaviniSnav, imdeni fuli wamoiRos, ramdensac iSovis. sxvaTa Soris, Tqven marTlac unda waikiTxoT bonaventura. didebuli sakiTxavia. metismetad nu aigdebT mecxramete saukunes. Tqveni xma ise JRers, TiTqos mecxramete saukune gZulT. _ marTalia, _ vupasuxe me, _ mZuls. _ cdebiT, _ miTxra man, _ sisulelea. arqiteqturac ki ar iyo iseTi cudi, rogorc laparakoben. _ mas gaecina. _ daelodeT meoce saukunis damlevs, sanam mecxrametes SeiZulebdeT. winaaRmdegi xom ar iqnebiT, Tqvenc gelaparakoT da Carozic mivirTva? _ qliavi? _ vkiTxe me. _ ara, _ mipasuxa man da odnav Caicina: _ Cemze gamwyralni arian da batonebis kerZebiT ar mimaspinZldebian. mxolod msaxurTa kerZs imeteben. dRes Carozad moxaluli Saqriani pudingia. Tumca, _ etyoba man kidev erTi kovzi pudingi Caido pirSi, gadaylapa da xiTxiTiT ganagrZo: _ Tumca me maT samagieros vuxdi, saaTobiT velaparakebi telefoniT Cems yofil TanamoZmes miunxenSi, isic Seleris mowafe iyo. zogjer ki hamburgSi vrekav, kinos cnobaTa biuroSi, anda berlinis amindis biuros vukavSirdebi da amas vakeTeb mxolod SurisZiebis mizniT. axlandel satelefono qselSi, roca saqalaqTaSoriso
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nomers TviTon kref, vin ras mixvdeba. _ man isev daiwyo ReWva, Semdeg CaixiTxiTa da CamCurCula: _ eklesia xom mdidaria, Semzaravad mdidari, ise yars fuliT, rogorc mdidari kacis gvami. iciT, Raribi kacis gvams rom kargi suni udis? _ ara, _ vupasuxe me da vigrZeni, rom Tavis tkivili cotaTi momeSva. saswavleblis telefonis nomeri wiTeli wriT Semovxaze. _ Tqven urwmuno kaci xarT, xom marTalia? ar miTxraT, arao, xmaze gatyobT, rom urwmuno kaci xarT. xom asea? _ diax, _ vupasuxe me. _ es arafers niSnavs, sruliad arafers, _ miTxra man. _ winaswarmetyvel esaias wignSi aris erTi adgili, romelic mociqul pavles romaelTa mimarT epistoledan momaqvs. mismineT yuradRebiT: `romelTa ara mieTxra misTvis, ixilon da, romelTa ara esma, gulisxma-yon~. _ man borotad CaixiTxiTa. _ mixvdiT? _ diax, _ vupasuxe uxalisod. uecrad momesma xmamaRla naTqvami sityvebi: _ saRamo mSvidobisa, batono direqtoro, saRamo mSvidobisa, _ da man yurmili dado. mis xmaSi gagulisebuli maamebloba igrZnoboda. fanjarasTan mivedi da saaTs Sevxede, quCis kuTxeSi rom ekida. cxris naxevari xdeboda. CemTvis gavifiqre, sakmaod bevrs Wamen-meTqi. siamovnebiT davelaparakebodi leos, magram axla mxolod im fulis dardi mqonda, mas rom unda esesxebina CemTvis. nel-nela vxvdebodi, ra seriozul mdgomareobaSi aRmovCndi. zogjer Tavad ar vici, ra ufro marTalia _ is, rac ase cxadad, ase xelSesaxebad warmovidgine, Tu is, rac sinamdvileSi ganvicade. yvelaferi erTmaneTSi mereva. daficebiT ver davificebdi, marTla davinaxe is biWi osnabriuqSi Tu ara, magram imis daficeba ki SemeZlo, rom leosTan erTad mors vxerxavdi. verc imaze vageb pasuxs, marTla fexiT wavedi edgar vinekenTan kalkSi, babuaCemis ocdaormarkiani Ceki rom naRd fulad meqcia, Tu ara. marTalia, detalebi zustad maxsovs, im qalis mwvane kofTac, funTuSebi rom ma190

Cuqa, axalgazrda muSis daglejili windebic _ muSam win Camiara, roca edgaris karis zRurblze vijeqi da velodebodi, magram es arafers niSnavs. bolomde darwmunebuli var, rom roca mors vxerxavdiT, leos zeda tuCi ofliT daenama, sakuTari TvaliT davinaxe. zustad maxsovs, agreTve, im Ramis yoveli wvrilmani, roca maris kiolnSi pirvelad moeSala muceli. hainrih belenma momixerxa, rom ramdenime saRamo gamemarTa axalgazrdebisaTvis _ yovel gamosvlaSi oc markas mixdidnen. mari metwilad Tan mimyveboda, magram im saRamos Sin darCa, radgan ar iyo kargad. gvian saRamos, roca jibeSi cxrameti marka medo da Sin davbrundi, oTaxi carieli damxvda. areul sawolze sisxliani zewari davinaxe, komodze ki baraTi vipove: `saavadmyofoSi var, saSiSi araferia, hainrihma yvelaferi icis~. imwamsve gaviqeci hainrihTan da pirquS ekonom qals vaTqmevine, romel saavadmyofoSi iwva mari. Semdeg saavadmyofos mivaSure, magram SigniT ar SemiSves. monazonma qalma manamde ar gamiRo WiSkari, sanam hainrihi ar movaZebnine saavadmyofoSi da telefoniT ar gamovaZaxebine. bolos, Ramis Tormetis naxevarze, rogorc iqna, SemiSves marisTan, magram yvelaferi ukve damTavrebuli iyo. gafiTrebuli mari loginSi iwva da tiroda. mis gverdiT Camomjdari monazoni loculobda da krialosans marcvlavda. sanam me maris xeli meWira da hainrihi Cumad uxsnida, ra mouva im arsebis suls, romelic man ver gaaCina, monazoni mSvidad ganagrZobda locvas. mari, etyoba, mtkiced iyo darwmunebuli, rom bavSvi _ ase eZaxda mas _ verasodes moxvdeboda zecaSi, radgan ar monaTlula. mari dausruleblad imeorebda, bavSvi gansawmendelSi darCebao, da im Rames pirvelad mivxvdi, ra saSinel abdaubdas aswavlian kaTolikeebs saRmrTo rjulis gakveTilebze. hainrihi sruliad umweo aRmoCnda, ver ganuqarva maris SiSi da swored is, rom igi aseTi umweo iyo, me sanugeSod miviCnie. hainrihi laparakobda RvTis mowyalebaze, rac `ufro yovlismomcvelia, vidre Teologebis iuridiuli mosazrebebi~. mTeli am xnis ganmavlobaSi monazoni loculobda da krialosans marcvlavda. religiis sakiTxebSi mari
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ukiduresad jiuti iyo _ hainrihs ekiTxeboda, sad aris gavlebuli diagonali kanonsa da RvTis mowyalebas Soriso. me sityva diagonali damamaxsovrda. bolos oTaxidan gavedi da Tavi sruliad zedmet, gariyul adamianad vigrZeni. derefanSi fanjarasTan gavCerdi, sigarets movukide da kedlis miRma mdebare avtomobilebis sasaflaos mivaCerdi. kedeli TiTqmis mTlianad saarCevno plakatebiT iyo dafaruli. `gamoucxade ndoba germaniis social-demokratiul partias~, `xma mieciT qristianul-demokratiul kavSirs~. maT aSkarad undodaT, am auwereli sibriyviT guli daemZimebinaT avadmyofebisaTvis, romlebsac, iqneb, TavianTi palatebidan kedlisaTvis SeexedaT. `gamoucxade ndoba germaniis social-demokratiul partias~. pirdapir genialuria! TiTqmis literaturul mowodebasaviT JRerda im siClungesTan SedarebiT, meore plakatze rom ewera: `xma mieciT qristianul-demokratiul kavSirs~. Ramis ori saaTi xdeboda. mogvianebiT me da mari vkamaTobdiT, marTla moxda Tu ara is, rac davinaxe. marcxnidan gamoCnda upatrono ZaRli, romelmac jer farani daynosa, Semdeg germaniis social-demokratiuli partiis plakati, mere qristianul-demokratiuli kavSiris plakati da swored am plakats miaSarda. amis Semdeg quCas ZunZuliT gahyva marjvniv, iqiTken, sadac quCa mTlianad ikargeboda sibneleSi. yovelTvis, roca am savalalo Rames movigonebdiT, maris an is ar sjeroda, rom marTla davinaxe ZaRli, an _ Tu ZaRlis arsebobaSi meTanxmeboda _ ar sjeroda, rom qristianul-demokratiuli kavSiris plakats miaSarda. mari meubneboda, mamaCemma iseTi didi gavlena moaxdina Senze, rom qvecnobierad icruebdi, WeSmaritebas uRalatebdi da, ZaRls rom socialdemokratiuli partiis plakati waebilwa, ecdebodi dagerwmunebine, rom qristianul-demokratiuli kavSiris plakati wabilwao. amave dros, mamamiss social-demokratiuli partia ufro sZulda, vidre qristianul-demokratiuli kavSiri. asec rom ar iyos, rac vnaxe, vnaxe, morCa da gaTavda. xuTi saaTi iqneboda, roca hainrihi saxlamde mivacile. sanam erenfelds mivyvebodiT, igi yoveli saxlis karze maniSneb192

da da luRluRebda: `aq Cemi samwysos cxvrebi cxovroben~. hainrihis buzRuna, yviTelwvivebianma ekonomma qalma anCxlad mogvaZaxa: `ras niSnavs es?~ me saxlSi wavedi, diasaxliss rom ar daenaxa, saabazanoSi Sevipare da zewari civi wyliT gavrecxe. erenfeldi, mura naxSiriT datvirTuli matareblebi, sarecxis Tokebi, abazana, romliTac sargebloba agvikrZales... Rame Cveni fanjris win zogjer yumbarasaviT Caiqrolebs nagviT savse parki, magram afeTqebis magier tyapuni ismis, didididi gamskdari parkidan kvercxis naWuWi gadmocvivdes da irgvliv gaifantos. hainrihi Cven gamo isev waeCxuba mRvdels, radgan undoda saqvelmoqmedo fondidan CvenTvis fuli esesxebina. me isev edgar vinekins mivakiTxe. amave dros, leom saaTi gamogvigzavna dasagiraveblad. edgarma cotaodeni fuli gamogvitana muSaTa socialuri dazRvevis salarodan. erTi sityviT, Cven SevZeliT wamlisa da taqsis fulis gadaxda da samkurnalo xarjebis sanaxevrod dafarva. gamaxsenda mari, monazoni, romelic loculobda da krialosans marcvlavda, sityva `diagonali~, ZaRli, saarCevno plakatebi, avtomobilebis sasaflao da Cemi civi xelebi, zewars rom vrecxavdi. miuxedavad amisa, danamdvilebiT mainc ver vityodi, rom yvelaferi marTlac ase moxda. verc imis mtkicebas daviwyebdi, TiTqos is berikaci, leos internatidan rom melaparakeboda, marTla urekavda berlinis amindis biuros im mizniT, rom eklesiisaTvis finansuri zarali mieyenebina. magram me xom marTla gavigone es sityvebi, iseve, rogorc misi piris wklapuni da lukmis gadaylapva, roca Saqrian pudings miirTmevda. 19 ise avkrife monika zilvsis nomeri, didxans ar mifiqria. isic ki ar vicodi, ra unda meTqva. zari jer kidev rekavda, roca man yurmili aiRo da Tqva: _ alo.
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misi xmis gagoneba mesiamovna. monikas Zlieri da Wkviani xma aqvs. _ hansi var, mindoda... magram monikam sityva Semawyvetina da miTxra: _ ah, Tqvena xarT... _ misi xma Seuracxmyofelad an usiamovnod ar JRerda, oRond aSkarad igrZnoboda, rom sxvis zars eloda da ara Cemsas. iqneb, megobar qals unda daereka an dedamiss... magram mainc guli damwyda. _ mxolod madlobis gadaxda mindoda, _ vuTxari me, _ iseTi gulkeTiloba gamoiCineT. _ aSkarad mcemda misi sunamos suni, _ taiga Tu rac hqvia, _ misTvis metismetad mZafri rom aris. _ mwyins, rom yvelaferi ase moxda, _ miTxra man, _ albaT, Zalian giWirT. _ ver mivxvdi, ras gulisxmobda: qosTerTis kritikul werils, romelic, albaT, mTel bons hqonda wakiTxuli, maris daqorwinebas Tu orives erTad. _ xom ar SemiZlia riTime dagexmaroT? _ mkiTxa man Cumad. _ diax, _ vupasuxe me, _ mestumreT da Cemi suli SeibraleT, agreTve, muxlic, romelic gvarianad gamisivda. monika dumda. megona, maSinve metyoda `kargio~, maRelvebda imis gafiqreba, vaiTu, marTla movides-meTqi, magram monikam ubralod miTxra: _ dRes vera, stumars velodebi. SeeZlo euwyebina, vis elodeboda, anda ubralod eTqva, megobar qals an mamakacso. sityva `stumarma~ cud gunebaze damayena. _ kargi, xval iyos. me, albaT, sul cota, erTi kvira mainc momiwevs loginSi wola. _ iqneb, SemiZlia sxva ramiT dagexmaroT, me vgulisxmob iseT rames, risi mogvarebac telefoniT xerxdeba. es sityvebi iseTi xmiT warmoTqva, rom imedi momeca _ xom SeiZleba, megobar qals elodebodes. _ diax, _ vupasuxe me, _ damikariT Sopenis mazurka sibemol maJori, meSvide opusi. monikas gaecina da miTxra:
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_ ra ar mogivaT azrad. Sopenis didi moyvaruli ara var. garda amisa, mis nawarmoebebs cudad vukrav. _ misi xmis gagonebam monogamiisadmi Cami midrekileba pirvelad Searyia. _ o, RmerTo, _ vuTxari me, _ amas ra mniSvneloba aqvs, notebi gaqvT? _ sadRac maqvs, _ miTxra man, _ erTi wuTiT... yurmili magidaze dado da gavigone, rogor gaiara oTaxSi. ramdenime wuTi gavida, sanam telefonTan dabrundeboda da me gamaxsenda, rom erTxel marim miTxra, megobari qali zogierT wmindansac ki hyavdao. cxadia, mxolod sulieri megobari, magram etyoba, im wmindanebs yvelaferi hqondaT, rasac qali sulierad iZleva, me ki esec ar mqonda. monikam isev aiRo yurmili. _ mazurkebi, ai, ageraa, _ miTxra man oxvriT. _ Cemo kargo, _ vuTxari me, _ damikariT mazurka sibemol maJori, opusi meSvide, nomeri pirveli. _ saukunea Sopeni ar damikravs, cota unda wavivarjiSo. _ iqneb, ar gindaT, Tqvenma stumarma gaigonos, Sopens rom ukravT? _ o, _ Tqva man siciliT, _ gaigonos Tu unda, ra menaRvleba. _ zomervildma? _ vkiTxe Zalian Cumad. gaocebisagan monikas yvirili aRmoxda, me ki ganvagrZe: _ Tu marTla is aris, roialis saxuravi TavSi CascxeT. _ mas es ar daumsaxurebia, _ miTxra man, _ Tqven Zalian uyvarxarT. _ vici, _ vupasuxe me, _ mjera kidec, magram me mainc mirCevnia, imis vaJkacoba meyos, rom sicocxles gamovasalmo. _ cotas wavivarjiSeb da mazurkas dagikravT, _ miTxra man swrafad, _ dagirekavT. _ keTili, _ vupasuxe me, magram yurmili arc erTs ar dagvidvia. cxadad mesmoda monikas sunTqva, ar vici, ramden xans, magram mesmoda. bolos man yurmili dado. me ki didxans ar gavuSvebdi yurmils xelidan, oRond misi sunTqva gamegona. RmerTo Cemo, Tundac qalis sunTqva...
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lobio jerac mZimed mawva kuWze da Cems melanqolias amZafrebda. miuxedavad amisa, mainc gavedi samzareuloSi, meore qila gavxseni, lobio imave qvabSi Cavasxi, raSic pirveli ulufa gavacxele da gazqura avanTe. Semdeg yavisnaleqiani qaRaldis filtri sanagve vedroSi Cavagde, sufTa filtri aviRe, Sig oTxi kovzi yava Cavyare, wyali cecxlze Sevdgi da Sevecade samzareulo damelagebina. iatakis sawmendi Cvari yavis gubeze davagde, konservis carieli qilebi da kvercxis naWuWebi vedroSi Cavyare. mZuls daulagebeli oTaxebi, magram me TviTon dalagebis Tavi ara maqvs. Semdeg saerTo oTaxSi gavedi, WuWyiani Wiqebi gamovitane da samzareuloSi wylis bakanSi Cavyare. bina TiTqos davalage, magram mainc daulagebeli Canda. mari swrafad da marjved axerxebda, oTaxi dalagebuls damsgavseboda. Tumca amisaTvis arafers gansakuTrebuls, TvalnaTliv dasanaxs ar akeTebda. es yvelaferi, etyoba, mis xelebze iyo damokidebuli. maris xelebis gaxsenebam _ mxolod imis warmodgenam, rom SeeZlo xelebi ciupfnerisaTvis mxrebze daewyo _ Cemi melanqolia sasowarkveTilebamde gaamZafra. qalis xelebs imdeni ram SeuZlaT gamoxaton an mogaCvenon, rom maTTan SedarebiT mamakacis xelebi mxrebze miwebebul jirkvebad meCveneba. mamakacis xelebi xelis CamorTmevisa da cema-tyepis, srolisa da xelis moweris xelebia. xelis CamorTmeva, cematyepa, srola da angariSsworebis Cekebze xelis mowera _ ai, yvelaferi, risi gakeTebac mamakacis xelebs SeuZliaT, cxadia, Sromac. qalis xelebi ki TiTqos xelebadac ki ar mimaCnia, maSinac ki, roca purze karaqs usvamen an Sublidan Tmas iyrian. arc erT Teologs ar mosvlia azrad, eqadaga saxarebaSi naxsenebi qalebis xelebze: veronikasa da magdalinas, mariamisa da marTas xelebze. ramdeni qalis xelia saxarebaSi da ra saTuTad eferebodnen isini qristes. nacvlad amisa, sulieri mamebi qadageben kanonebze, wesrigis principebze, xelovnebasa da saxelmwifoze. sinamdvileSi ki, ase vTqvaT, piradad qristes TiTqmis mxolod qalebTan hqonda saqme. ra Tqma unda, mamakacebic sWirdeboda, radgan isini qalikiviT xelisuflebasTan arian dakavSirebulni, erkvevian organizaciebsa da sxva
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amgvar sisuleleebSi. qristes mamakacebi mZime samuSaosaTvis sWirdeboda, rogorc binis gamocvlis dros avejis SemfuTvelebi sWirdebaT uxeSi samuSaos Sesasruleblad. petre da ioane iseTi xaTrianebi iyvnen, rom vaJkacobis TiTqmis araferi ecxoT, samagierod, pavle iseTi vaJkaci iyo, romaels rom Seefereboda. saxlSi, rogorc ki dros ixelTebdnen, xmamaRla gvikiTxavdnen biblias. Cvens naTesaobaSi uamravi pastoria, magram arc erTs arasodes ulaparakia saxarebaSi naxseneb qalebze anda iseT gaugebar ambavze, rogoricaa araki usamarTlo mamonaze. usamarTlo mamonaze kaTolikur `wreSic~ ki aravis surda laparaki, roca amaze sityvas Camovagdebdi. kinkeli da zomervildi ise morcxvad iRimebodnen, TiTqos qriste raRac saCoTiro lafsusSi gamoiWires, fredeboili ki ambobda, istoriis msvlelobaSi es gamoTqma gacvdao. Turme nu ityviT da, mas ar moswonda am gamoTqmis `iracionaluroba~. ise gamodioda, TiTqos fuli raRac racionaluri iyos. Tumca maris xelSi fulic ki kargavda saeWvo Sinaarss, radgan maris erTi saocari Tviseba hqonda _ fulis xarjvaSi uyairaTobasac iCenda da did yairaTianobasac. piradad me principulad uarvyof rogorc Cekebs, aseve `unaRdo angariSsworebis~ sxva saSualebebsac. honorars yovelTvis naRdi fuliT viRebdi adgilze da amitom xarjebis winaswari dagegmva or an sam dReze meti xniT ar gvWirdeboda. mari yvelas aZlevda fuls, vinc ki sTxovda, zogjer ki imasac, vinc ar sTxovda. saubarSi Tu vinmes dascdeboda, viRacas uWirso, igi mzad iyo, daxmareboda. gioTingenSi erT oficiants, romlis Svili im wels skolaSi unda wasuliyo, bavSvisaTvis zamTris paltos sayideli fuli aCuqa. matarebelSi yovelTvis ixdida damatebiT Tanxas im dabneuli bebiebis nacvlad, romlebic dakrZalvaze miemgzavrebodnen da SemTxveviT pirveli klasis vagonSi aRmoCndebodnen xolme. qveyanaze uamravi bebiaa, matarebliT Svilebis, SviliSvilebis, rZlebisa da siZeebis dasaflavebaze rom miemgzavreba. zogjer isini TavianTi bebruli umweobiT keklucoben, didis ambiT Cabargdebian pirveli klasis
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vagonSi Sebolili ZexviT, Roris qoniTa da namcxvrebiT gamotenili mZime CanTebiT da parkebiT. Tumca kupeSi yvelam icoda, rom bebias jibeSi meore klasis bileTi edo, mari mainc maiZulebda, mZime Cemodnebi da parkebi sabargo badeSi momeTavsebina. Semdeg derefanSi gadioda da am saqmes vagonis gamyolTan `agvarebda~, sanam bebias Secdomaze miuTiTebdnen. zedmeti Tanxa rom ar gadaexada, mari winaswar hkiTxavda moxucs, sad miemgzavreboda da vis dasaflavebaze. madlierebis grZnobas bebiebi Semdegi Tavaziani sityvebiT gamoxatavdnen: `arc ise cudi axalgazrdoba gvyavs, rogorc laparakoben~ da gasamrjelod maris uSvelebel lorian buterbrods awvdidnen. yovelTvis meCveneboda, rom yvelaze meti bebia dorTmundsa da hanovers Soris miemgzavreboda dasaflavebaze. maris rcxvenoda xolme, Cven rom pirveli klasis vagoniT vmgzavrobdiT, da ver aitanda Cveni kupedan vinme gaeZevebinaT mxolod imis gamo, rom meore klasis bileTi hqonda. uzomo moTminebiT ismenda gaWianurebul axsna-ganmartebas, vin visTan ra naTesaur kavSirSia da aTvalierebda sruliad ucxo adamianebis fotosuraTebs. erTxel mTeli ori saaTi visxediT biukerbergeli xnieri glexi qalis gverdiT, romelsac ocdasami SviliSvili hyavda da TiToeulis fotosuraTs Tan atarebda. Cven movismineT ocdasami biografia, ocdasami axalgazrda mamakacisa da qalis suraTi vnaxeT. ocdasamivem raRacas miaRwia cxovrebaSi. erTi miunsterSi qalaqis inspeqtori iyo, meore rkinigzis mosamsaxuris coli, mesame saxerxi qarxnis gamge, meoTxes im partiaSi ekava Tanamdeboba, romelsac yovelTvis virCevT _ Tavad iciTo, xolo im SviliSvilze, romelic bundesverSi msaxurobda, dedaberma gviTxra: `yovelTvis myari mdgomareobis momxre iyo~. mari didi yuradRebiT ismenda am ambebs. sainteresod miaCnda da marwmunebda, `namdvili cxovreba~ es ariso. me ki mRlida es erTferovani ambebi. dorTmundsa da hanovers Soris uamravi bebia mgzavrobs, romelTa SviliSvilebi rkinigzis momsaxureni arian da romelTa rZlebi naadrevad ixocebian imis gamo, rom `axlandel qalebs bavSvebis Soba ar undaT... asea es~.
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mari metismetad xaTriani da gulTbili iyo yvela moxucis mimarT, visac daxmareba sWirdeboda. Tu saWiro iyo, igi maT telefoniT darekvaSic ki exmareboda. erTxel vuTxari, kargi iqneboda, sadguris qristianul misiaSi dagewyo samsaxuri-meTqi, razedac man odnav geslianad momaxala: _ ratomac ara? es rom vuTxari, arc boroti zraxva medo gulSi da arc misi abuCad agdeba mindoda. axla ki mari raRacnairad mainc aRmoCnda sadguris qristianul misiaSi. Cemi azriT, ciupfnerma imitom SeirTo mari, rom `gadaerCina~, maric imitom gahyva ciupfners, rom `gadaerCina~. magram ara mgonia, ciupfneri dasTanxmeboda maris, bebiebis magivrad gadaexada misi fuli Cqari matarebliT mgzavrobisa da pirveli klasis vagonSi gadayvanisaTvis. ciupfneri namdvilad ar iyo Zunwi, magram leosaviT isic gulis gamawyaleblad mcirediT kmayofildeboda. igi ar hgavda francisk asizels, romelic mcirediT kmayofildeboda, magram, amave dros, kargad esmoda imaTi, vinc mcires ar sjerdeba. imis warmodgena, rom axla maris safuleSi ciupfneris fuli edo, autaneli meCveneboda. aseve autaneli meCveneboda sityvebi `Taflobis Tve~ da idea, rom marisaTvis unda mebrZola. brZola xom mxolod fizikur mxares gulisxmobs. iseT cudad navarjiSeb klounsac ki, rogoric me viyavi, didi upiratesoba mqonda rogorc ciupfnerTan, aseve zomervildTan SedarebiT. sanam isini sabrZolo pozicias miiRebdnen, me samjer gadavidodi yiraze, maT zurgSi moveqceodi, Zirs davcemdi da yelSi xelebs wavuWerdi. vin icis, iqneb, isini namdvil Cxubs gulisxmobdnen. maTgan yvelaferia mosalodneli, `nibelungebze Tqmulebis~ aseTi gaukuRmarTebuli variantebic ki. an, iqneb, sulier brZolas gulisxmobdnen? me arc am SemTxvevaSi meSinoda maTi. ratom ar misces maris ufleba, pasuxi gaeca Cems werilze, rac erTgvari sulieri brZolis gamocxadebas udrida? TviTon usircxvilod warmoTqvamen iseT sityvebs, rogorebicaa `Taflobis Tve~, `saqorwino mogzauroba~, me ki uzneobaSi mdeben brals. farisevlebi arian, aba ra. netav, erTi moasmeninaT, ras hyvebian oficiantebi da
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moaxleebi `Taflobis Tveze~ da `saqorwino mogzaurobaze~. sadac unda gamoCndes wyvili _ matarebelSi Tu sastumroSi, _ yvela vigindara CurCulebs `Taflobis Tve~ aqvTo da yovelma bavSvma icis, rom isini dausruleblad `im saqmes~ akeTeben. Tanac viRaca xom ucvlis maT TeTreuls da recxavs. roca mari ciupfners mxrebze xelebs daadebs, nuTu ar gaaxsendeba, yinuliviT gaToSil xelebs rom iRliebqveS vuTbobdi. maris xelebi saxlis kars aReben, zeviT mZinare patara maris sabans usworeben, qveviT, samzareuloSi, tosters rTaven, wyals asaduReblad cecxlze dgamen, kolofidan sigarets iReben. moaxlis baraTi amjerad samzareulos magidaze ki ara, macivarze xvdeba: `wavedi kinoSi, aTze davbrundebi~. saerTo oTaxSi televizorze ciupfneris baraTi devs: `saswrafod momixda f-sTan wasvla. gkocni bevrs. heriberTi~. samzareulos magidis nacvlad _ macivari, `gkocnis~ nacvlad _ `gkocni bevrs~. samzareuloSi dabrawul purs sqlad usvam karaqs da zemodan RviZlis Zexvis sqel naWrebs adeb, finjanSi oris nacvlad sam kovz Sokoladis fxvnils yri da pirvelad grZnob, ra gamaRizianebelia gasaxdomi dieta. gagondeba, frau bloTertma rogor daiwripina, roca meore naWeri namcxvari gadaiRe! _ saboloo jamSi es xom aTas xuTas kaloriaze metia, nuTu SegiZliaT amis ufleba misceT Tavs? Semdeg Sens wels yasbis Tvali Seavlo da am mzeraSi Zneli ar iyo uTqmeli daskvnis amokiTxva: `ara, Tqven ar gaqvT amis ufleba~. o, uwmindeso `ka-ka-ka~, `Sen _ nclero da _ Tolono!~ diax, diax, TandaTan suqdebi. qalaqSi CurCuleben, WorikanaTa qalaqSi Worikanoben, ratom ver isveneb, ratom eZeb martoobas sibneleSi, kinoebsa da eklesiebSi, ratom miirTmev Sokoladsa da dabrawul purs Cabnelebul saerTo oTaxSi? ra upasuxe im ymawvils, cekvis dros rom swrafad gkiTxa: `Cqara miTxariT, mowyaleo qalbatono, ra giyvarT am qveyanaze, Cqara!~ Senc simarTle uTxari:
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_ bavSvebi, saaRsarebo, kino, gregorianuli qoralebi da klounebi. _ kacebi ar giyvarT, mowyaleo qalbatono? _ rogor ara, magram mxolod erTi, _ upasuxe Sen, _ sxva kaci CemTvis ar arsebobs, isini briyvebi arian. _ momcemT nebas, Tqveni pasuxi gamovaqveyno? _ ara, ara, RvTis gulisaTvis, ara! raki Tqvi, erTi kacio, ratom ar daamate, Cemio? roca erTi kaci giyvars da ambob erTio, SeuZlebelia mxolod Sens kanonier qmars gulisxmobde. o, ra mniSvnelovania es patara, daviwyebuli, uTqmeli sityva `Cemi~. moaxle Sin brundeba. gasaRebs budeSi aCxakunebs, kars aRebs, Semdeg ketavs da kvlav ismis gasaRebis Cxakuni. winkarSi sinaTle inTeba da isev qreba. Semdeg sinaTles samzareuloSi anTebs, macivris kars aRebs da ketavs. bolos samzareuloSic qreba sinaTle da Sens karze moridebiT akakunebs: _ Rame mSvidobisa, qalbatono. _ Rame mSvidobisa, patara mari kargad iqceoda? _ diax, Zalian kargad. derefanSi sinaTle qreba. ismis kibeze amavali nabijebis xma (maSasadame, mari sruliad marto ijda bnel oTaxSi da saeklesio musikas ismenda). im xelebiT, zewari rom garecxe da Semdeg iRliebqveS gagiTbe, axla yvelafers exebi: firsakravs, firfitebs, saxelurs, Rilaks, finjans, purs, bavSvis Tmas da CogburTis Cogans. _ ho, marTla, ratom aRar dadixar CogburTis saTamaSod? mxrebs iCeC, ar gexaliseba, ubralod, aRar gexaliseba. arada, CogburTi xom politikosebisa da xelmZRvanel kaTolikeTa colebis Sesaferisi TamaSia. ara, ara, es cnebebi jerjerobiT mTlad identuri rodia. CogburTis TamaSiT inarCuneben formas, moqnilobasa da mimzidvelobas. _ f-s Zalian uyvars SenTan CogburTis TamaSi, Sen ki igi ar mogwons. _ rogor ara, rogor ara!
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_ f... gulTbili kacia. Tumca masze amboben, ministris posts brtyel-brtyeli laparakiT da muSti-kriviT miaRwiao. mas aramzadad da intriganad Tvlian, magram heriberTis mimarT marTlac keTiladaa ganwyobili. unamusoebsa da mosyidulebs zogjer uyvarT namusiani da mousyidveli adamianebi. heriberTma ise keTilsindisierad aiSena saxli, kacs guli auCuydeba, arc sagangebo kreditiT usargeblia da arc daxmareba uTxovia samSeneblo saqmeSi gamocdili partiuli da erTmorwmune kaTolikeebisaTvis. erTi kia _ baRis gaSeneba moindoma ferdobze. ai, aq ki zedmeti fulis gadaxda dasWirda, rac `TavisTavad~ uzneo saqcielad miaCnia. axla ki ra gamovida, baRi ferdobze mouxerxebeli ram yofila. vinc baRs ferdobze aSenebs, ori variantidan SeuZlia airCios erT-erTi _ an aRmavali, an daRmavali: heriberTma daRmavali airCia. swored es qmnis uxerxulobas. male patara mari burTis TamaSs daiwyebs da burTi yovelTvis mezoblis baRis meseramde Cagordeba, zogjer ki RobeSic gaZvreba, totebs daamtvrevs, yvavilebs gaTelavs, naz, Zvirfasi jiSis xavss gaaoxrebs, rac, bolos da bolos, daZabul, sabodiSo situacias Seqmnis. `rogor SeiZleba gaubrazde aseT patara, momxibvlel gogonas~. ar SeiZleba. mxiaruli, wkriala xmebi viTomc udardelobas gamoxataven, gasaxdomi dietisagan damanWuli tuCebi _ sixaruls, daZagruli, ZarRvebdaWimuli kisrebi _ sixalises. arada, erTi rigiani Cxubi da magari lanZRva-gineba pirdapir cxoneba iqneboda maTTvis. raRac garkveul dromde rogorRac axerxeben grZnobebis daokebas, keTilmezobluri Rimilis miRma damalvas, magram rodisme, zafxulis erT wynar saRamos, gaigonebT, Caketili karebisa da CamoSvebuli Jaluzebis ukan ra lawaluwi autydeba faifuris Zvirfas WurWels, embrionis landebs rom uSenen: `me ki mindoda Svili myoloda, Sen, Sen ar gindoda~. Zvirfasi WurWeli iaffasiani xmauriT miefSvneba samzareulos kedlebs. saswrafo daxmarebis manqana yuriswamRebi wiviliT auyveba aRmarTs. gadatexila krokusi, gaTelila xavsi, bavSvis xeliT nasroli burTi mezoblis baR202

Si migoravs. manqanis yuriswamRebi wivili xalxs gamoucxadebeli omis dawyebas auwyebs. oi, netav sxvanairad gagveSenebina baRi. telefonis zarma SemakrTo. yurmili aviRe da gavwiTldi, monika zilvsi sul gadamaviwyda. _ alo, hans, _ miTxra monikam. _ diax, _ vupasuxe me, magram jer kidev ver momesazrebina, risTvis damireka. mazurka mxolod maSin gamaxsenda, roca miTxra, `imedi gagicruvdebaT~. ukan dasaxevi gza moWrili mqonda, ver vetyodi, gadavifiqre-meTqi, Zalauneburad im saSineli mazurkisaTvis unda gagveZlo. gavigone, rogor dado monikam yurmili roialze da daiwyo dakvra. ukravda SesaniSnavad, bgera didebuli iyo, magram mosmenisas ise cudad gavxdi, rom avtirdi. rogor gavbede da vcade im wamis ganmeoreba, marisagan wamosuli Sin rom davbrundi da samusiko oTaxSi leo am mazurkas ukravda. ara, ar SeiZleba gancdili wamis ganmeoreba da misi sxvisTvis gaziareba. Semodgomis erT saRamos Cvens parkSi edgar vinekenma 100 metri 10,1 wamSi gairbina. Tavad gavzome manZili, meve vakvirdebodi wammzoms. im saRamos man marTla gairbina 100 metri 10,1 wamSi. maSin saukeTeso formaSi iyo, erTgvar aRmafrenas ganicdida, magram Cven, ra Tqma unda, aravin dagvijera. SevcdiT, rom yovelive es sxvebs vuambeT da im wamis gaxangrZliveba movindomeT. nuTu ar SeiZleboda davmtkbariyaviT imis SegnebiT, rom man 100 metri 10,1 wamSi gairbina. Semdeg edgari am manZils Zveleburad 10,9 da 11,0 wamSi faravda da Cveni, ra Tqma unda, aravis sjeroda, masxrad gvigdebdnen. aseT momentebze laparaki TavisTavadaa Secdoma, maTi ganmeorebis cda ki _ TviTmkvleloba. cxadia, erTgvari TviTmkvleloba iyo monikas dakruli Sopenis mazurkis mosmena. arsebobs ganmeorebaze dafuZnebuli ritualuri momentebi, Tundac vinekenebis ojaxSi puris daWra. erTxel gadavwyvite, es rituali gamemeorebina, maris vTxove, puri daeWra frau vinekeniviT, magram muSis ojaxis samzareulo arafriT hgavs sastumros oTaxs, xolo mari ar iyo frau vinekeni _ dana xelidan gausxlta, marcxena mklavi
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gaiWra da am SemTxvevam sami kviriT amogvagdo kalapotidan. aseTi ukuRmarTi Sedegi SeiZleba mohyves sentimentalobas. unda SeaSfoTo gardasuli wamebi, arasodes ar unda scado maTi ganmeoreba. rodesac monikam dakvra daamTavra, ise cudad viyavi, tirilis Tavic aRar mqonda. etyoba, man es igrZno, roca yurmili aiRo, da Cumad miTxra: _ ai, xom xedavT. _ Cemi bralia da ara Tqveni, _ vupasuxe me, _ mapatieT. ase megona, TiTqos galeSili, aqoTebuli, sakuTar narwyevSi amogangluli vegde wumpeSi, uwmawurad viginebodi da viRac, Cem mierve dabarebuli, suraTs miRebda, raTa Semdeg foto monikasaTvis gamegzavna. _ SeiZleba kidev erTxel dagirekoT? _ vkiTxe Cumad, _ Tundac ramdenime dRis Semdeg. saZaglad viqcevi da gasamarTleblad mxolod erTi ram SemiZlia giTxraT: ise cudad var, verc ki gadmogcemT. ramdenime wams misi sunTqvis meti araferi mesmoda, bolos miTxra; _ ori kviriT sxvagan mivemgzavrebi. _ sad? _ vkiTxe me. _ minda RvTismetyvelebaSi wavimecadino, cotac vxato. _ rodis mestumrebiT? _ vkiTxe me, _ rodis gamikeTebT sokoian omlets da Tqvenebur salaTas? _ ver moval, _ miTxra man, _ axla ver moval. _ mere? _ mere ki, _ miTxra monikam da, sanam yurmils dadebda, misi tirili gavigone. 20 gavifiqre, abazana Tu miSvelis-meTqi. iseTi gabinZurebuli meCveneboda sakuTari Tavi, megona, lazaresaviT1 vyardi. aralazare _ qristes mier mkvdreTiT aRdgenili mariamisa da marTas Zma, avadmyofTa mfarveli. aqedan _ saxelwodeba lazareTi.
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da, sruliad sufTa viyavi da arc arafris suni mdioda. samzareuloSi Sevlaslasdi, gamovrTe qura, romelzec wyali da lobio cxeldeboda, Semdeg isev saerTo oTaxSi davbrundi da koniaki pirdapir boTlidan movsvi _ veraferma miSvela. telefonis zarmac ki ver gamomiyvana gaognebidan, yurmili aviRe da vTqvi: _ diax. sabine emondsi aRmoCnda. _ hans, ra gemarTeba? _ me vdumdi, man ganagrZo: _ depeSebs gvigzavni, es iseT dramatul STabeWdilebas axdens, marTlac ase cudad gaqvs saqme? _ sakmaod cudad, _ vupasuxe daRlilma. _ bavSvebs vaseirnebdi, _ Tqva man, _ karlma ki Tavisi klasi soflis skola-internatSi waiyvana erTi kviriT. SenTan rom damereka, vinme unda dametovebina bavSvebTan. _ xmaze etyoboda, gasavaTebuli da cotaTi gaRizianebulic ki iyo, Tumca misi xma yovelTvis ase JRerda. verafriT movaxerxe, fuli meTxova misTvis. mas Semdeg, rac karlma coli SeirTo, mudam saarsebo minimumis gamoangariSebaSi iyo. roca masTan Cxubi momivida, ukve sami Svili hyavda da meoTxes elodeboda. ver gavbede, mekiTxa sabinesaTvis, meoTxe Tu daibadameTqi. maT ojaxSi yovelTvis sufevda SeuniRbavi, gamaRizianebeli daZabuloba. yvelgan eyara karlis dawyevlili ubis wignakebi, sadac angariSobda, rogor gaetana Tavi xelfasiT. roca martoni vrCebodiT, karli Semzaravad mixsnida guls, iwyebda mamakacur saubars bavSvebis gaCenaze, sayvedurobda kaTolikur eklesias (saamisod raRa me amirCia) da bolos dgeboda wuTi, roca aymuvlebuli ZaRliviT Semomxedavda da umetes SemTxvevaSi swored am dros Semodioda oTaxSi sabine da karls gaborotebuli miaCerdeboda, radgan fexmZimed iyo. CemTvis imaze saSineli araferia, roca coli qmars imis gamo uyurebs gaborotebiT, rom fexmZimedaa. bolos erTad Camosxdebodnen da wyvilad iwyebdnen ymuils, radgan maT marTla uyvardaT erTmaneTi, kedlis miRma ki bavSvebs erTi Jivil-xivili hqondaT, siamovnebiT ayiravebdnen Ramis qoT205

nebs da svel Cvrebs axalSpalergakrul kedlebs uSendnen. am dros karli dauRalavad gaiZaxoda `disciplina~ da `absoluturi, usityvo morCileba!~. me iZulebuli vxdebodi, bavSvebis oTaxSi gavsuliyavi da patarebis dasawynareblad ramdenime fokusi meCvenebina, magram dawynarebis nacvlad siamovnebisagan wiodnen da fokusebis gameorebas lamobdnen. yvelaferi es imiT Tavdeboda, rom yvelani mivusxdebodiT magidas, bavSvebs saTiTaod SevisvamdiT muxlze da nebas vaZlevdiT, Cveni Wiqidan cotaodeni Rvino maTac moewrupaT. karli da sabine im wignebsa da kalendrebze iwyebdnen saubars, sadac weria, rodis ar uCndeba qals bavSvi. miuxedavad amisa, bavSvebi mainc uCndebodaT da maT azrad ar mosdiodaT, rom amgvari saubari gansakuTrebiT gamawamebeli iyo CemTvis da marisaTvis, radgan bavSvebi ar gvyavda. mogvianebiT, roca karli SezarxoSdeboda, wyevla-krulvas uTvlida roms, qoqolas ayrida kardinalebs da papebs. yvelaze sasacilo ki is iyo, rom papis dacva me mixdeboda. mari am ambebSi gacilebiT ukeT erkveoda da cdilobda, aexsna karlisa da sabinesaTvis, rom roms ar SeuZlia am sakiTxs sxvagvarad miudges. maSin karli da sabine eSmakurad gadaxedavdnen erTmaneTs da amiT TiTqos ambobdnen: `viciT, ra Svilebic xarT... ra uebar saSualebas ar mimarTavT, albaT, imisaTvis, rom Svili ar geyoloT~. bolos uZilobisagan daRlili romelime bavSvi maris, me, karls an sabines xelidan Wiqas gamogvtacebda da Rvinos saklaso samuSaoebis rveulebze gadaasxamda. rveulebi yovelTvis dastebad ewyo karlis sawer magidaze. karli cofdeboda, radgan mowafeebs mudam disciplinasa da wesrigze elaparakeboda da, amave dros, iZulebuli iyo maTTvis RviniT dasvrili rveulebi daebrunebina. damnaSaves mityepdnen, iwyeboda Rriali, sabine ki ise dagvgeslavda mzeriT, TiTqos ambobda: `ris maqnisebi xarT mamakacebi~ da marisTan erTad gavidoda samzareuloSi yavis mosaxarSad. aq isini dedakacur saubars gaabamdnen, rasac mari iseve ver itans, rogorc me mamakacur saubars. amasobaSi karli da me marto vrCebodiT da igi isev iwyebda laparaks fulze, xan206

daxan sayvedursac gamourevda, rac niSnavda: guls imitom gixsni, rom kargi biWi xar, Torem Sen Cemsas ras gaigebo. _ sabine, _ vuTxari oxvriT, _ sruliad gakotrebuli var _ sulieradac, fizikuradac, profesionaluradac da finansuradac. _ Tu marTla gSia, _ miTxra man, _ imedia ici, rom quraze yovelTvis dagxvdeba qvabi wvnianiT. xma ver amoviRe. misi sityvebi ise gulwrfelad da saqmianad JRerda, rom guli amiCuyda. _ gesmis? _ mkiTxa man. _ mesmis, _ vupasuxe me, _ da ara ugvianes xvalisa, moval sadilad da Cems wil wvnians Sevxvrep. ai, kidev ra, Tu odesme dagWirdebaT vinme, vinc bavSvebs unda mixedos, me... me... me... _ ena dameba: aba, ras emgvaneboda, axla rom fuli meTxova imis sanacvlod, rac mudam ufasod gamikeTebia maTTvis, Tanac is idioturi SemTxveva gamaxsenda, gregors rom kvercxi vaWame. sabinem gaicina da miTxra: _ Tqvi, Tqvi, ra ginda? _ me mxolod imis Tqma mindoda, _ vuTxari me, _ iqneb, SegiZliaT Tqvens nacnobebTan rekomendacia gamiwioT. telefoni maqvs da safasurs sxvebze mets ar gamovarTmev. sabine dumda da me vigrZeni, Tu ra Zlier iyo aRelvebuli. _ mismine, _ miTxra man, _ didxans laparakis dro ar maqvs, gamagebine, ra moxda? etyoba, sabine erTaderTi adamiani iyo mTel bonSi, romelsac qosTerTis kritikuli werili wakiTxuli ar hqonda. mivxvdi imasac, rom man ar icoda, ra moxda Cemsa da maris Soris. im `wridan~ is aravis icnobda. _ sabine, _ vuTxari me, _ marim mimatova. colad gahyva viRac ciupfners. _ RmerTo Cemo, _ wamoiZaxa man, _ ar mjera. _ daijere, _ vuTxari me. sabine dumda da me gavigone, rogor akakunebda viRac telefonis jixuris karze. es, albaT, erTi im idiotTagani iyo,
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romelsac surda partniorisaTvis emcno, rom Sansi hqonda skatSi moego partia gulis koziriT usamvaletod. _ unda SegerTo, _ miTxra sabinem Cumad, _ imis Tqma minda... oh, kargad ici, ris Tqmac minda. _ vici, _ vupasuxe me, _ vapirebdi kidec, magram Semdeg gamoirkva, rom xelT unda mqonoda is wyeuli mowmoba qorwinebis saregistracio biurodan da unda damedo werilobiTi piroba, gesmis, werilobiTi piroba, rom bavSvebs kaTolikurad aRvzrdidi. _ ki magram, amis gamo xom ar gaCenila Tqven Soris bzari, _ miTxra man. telefonis jixurze kidev ufro Zlier daakakunes. _ ar vici, _ vupasuxe me, _ mTavari mizezi es iyo, magram amas kidev bevri iseTi ram erTvis, raSic ver gavrkveulvar. dakide yurmili, sabine, Torem eg gacofebuli germaneli jixuris karTan bolos mogiRebs. Cvens qveyanaSi nadirebi jer kidev ar gadaSenebulan. _ dampirdi, rom gvestumrebi, _ miTxra man, _ da icode, Seni wili wvniani yovelTvis cecxlze iqneba Sedgmuli. _ uecrad xmas dauwia da CurCuliT miTxra: _ ra sulmdablobaa, ra sulmdablobaa... _ sabine ise iyo gaognebuli, rom yurmilis dakidebac ki daaviwyda da im Taroze dado, sadac telefonis wigni devs. am dros gavigone im idiotis sityvebi: `rogorc iqna~, magram sabine, etyoba, ukve gaecala iqaurobas. yurmilSi gamyinavi xmiT CavZaxe: _ miSveleT, miSveleT! axalgazrda kaci ankesze wamoego, yurmili aiRo da miTxra: _ riT SemiZlia dagexmaroT? _ misi xma seriozulad, darbaislurad da vaJkacuradac ki JRerda da me vigrZeni, rom raRac mJave hqonda naWami, damJavebuli qaSayi an raRac amdagvari. _ alo, alo, _ miTxra man. _ germaneli brZandebiT? _ vkiTxe me, _ principulad mxolod germanelebs velaparakebi. _ mSvenieri principia, _ miTxra man, _ ra giWirT?
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_ qristianul-demokratiuli kavSiris bedi mawuxebs. Tqvenc xom mxolod am partias aZlevT xmas? _ TavisTavad cxadia, _ miTxra ganawyenebulma. _ Tu asea, aRaraferi miWirs, _ vuTxari me da yurmili davde. 21 is vigindara sakadrisad unda gamelanZRa, unda mekiTxa, sakuTari coli Tu gaaupatiura ukve, skatSi partia Tu moigo ori valetiT da ilaqlaqa Tu ara samsaxurSi kolegebTan ori saaTi omze. namdvili meuRlisa da patiosani germanelis xma hqonda, xolo misi `rogorc iqna~ ise JRerda, TiTqos brZanebas iZleoda: `mizanSi amoiReT~. sabine emondsis xmam cotaTi damamSvida. marTalia, xmaSi daRliloba da odnavi gaRizianeba igrZnoboda, magram darwmunebuli viyavi, maris saqcieli marTlac unamusobad miaCnda da mis quraze CemTvis yovelTvis idgmeboda qvabiT cxeli wvniani. sabine gemriel kerZebs amzadebda. roca fexmZimed ar iyo da roca mamakacebs TvalebiT ar gveubneboda, ris maqnisebi xarTo, uaRresad mxiaruli qalic iyo da ukeTesi kaTolikec, vidre karli, romelmac `seqsze~ Tavisi ucnauri, seminaristuli warmodgena SeinarCuna. sabines momduravi mzera sinamdvileSi mTel sakaceTs exeboda, xolo roca uyurebda karls, romlis mizeziTac am mdgomareobaSi aRmoCnda, misi Tvalebi araCveulebrivad muqdebodnen da mrisxanebas akvesebdnen. me yovelTvis vcdilobdi, sabine gamerTo, romelime scenas gaviTamaSebdi da isic didxans, gulianad icinoda, sicilisagan cremlebi sdioda, mere ki tirils morTavda da sicili aRar axsovda. maris sabine gareT gahyavda dasamSvideblad, karli ki, romelsac am dros saxeze danaSaulis grZnoba aRebeWdeboda, erTxans warbSekruli ijda Cem win da bolos sasowarkveTili iwyebda rveulebis gasworebas. zogjer rveulebis gasworebaSic vexmarebodi, Secdomas wiTeli avtokalmiT vusvamdi xazs, magram karli ar mendoboda, yvelafers Tavidan gadaxedavda da yvelaze metad is acofebda, rom SeumCneveli arc
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erTi Secdoma ar mrCeboda, wiTeli xazi yovelTvis sworad iyo gasmuli. ver egueboda im azrs, rom amgvari samuSao mec SemiZlia normalurad Sevasrulo da am saqmeSi mas tols ar vudeb. karls mxolod erTi problema awuxebda _ es gaxldaT fuli. mas rom SvidoTaxiani bina hqonoda, arc gaRizianebuli iqneboda da arc gasavaTebuli. erTxel kinkels misi amoCemebuli cnebis `saarsebo minimumis~ gamo SevekamaTe. kinkels amgvari sakiTxebis erT-erT genialur specialistad miiCnevdnen. mgoni, swored man gamoiangariSa _ did qalaqSi mcxovrebi martoxela mamakacis saarsebo minimumi, binis qiris gamoklebiT, oTxmocdaoTx markas udriso. mogvianebiT cota waamata _ oTxmocdaeqvsso. aRar Sevdavebivar, radgan Tu im uxamsi anekdotis mixedviT vimsjelebT, man rom gviambo, TviTon mas sakuTar saarsebo minimumad dasaxelebul Tanxaze ocdaTxuTmetjer meti sWirdeboda. aseT gamodavebas piradi siZulviliT axsnidnen da utaqtobaSi CamiTvlidnen, Tumca imaze meti utaqtoba ra SeiZleboda yofiliyo, roca kinkelisTana adamianebi sxvebis saarsebo minimums gansazRvravdnen. oTxmocdaeqvsi marka iTvaliswinebda kulturuli moTxovnilebebis dasakmayofilebel xarjebsac, albaT, kinos da gazeTs gulisxmobda. me vkiTxe, am fuliT martoxela kaci karg, aRmzrdelobiTi xasiaTis films Tu naxavs-meTqi. am kiTxvam kinkeli gaacofa. Semdeg vkiTxe, rogor unda gavigoT punqti `TeTreulis maragis ganaxleba~. es imas xom ar niSnavs, saministrom sagangebod iqiraos erTi gulkeTili berikaci, romelic bonSi irbens imisaTvis, rom qveda sacvali gacviTos da Semdeg saministros moaxsenos, ramdeni xani sWirdeba nifxvis gacveTas. aq ukve saqmeSi kinkelis coli Caeria da saxifaTo subieqturoba damwama. CemTvis, ase Tu ise, gasagebia, roca komunistebi adgenen sursaT-sanovagis aTvisebis an cxvirsaxocebis gacveTis normebs, radgan isini ar pirferoben da zebunebriv sawyisebs ar eZeben, magram roca aseTi qristianebi, rogoric Tqveni qmaria, aseT utifar sigiJemde midian, aRar vici, ra vTqva-meTqi. kinkelis colma miTxra, pirwavardnili materialisti xarT da araferi ga210

gegebaT msxverplis gaRebis, tanjvis, bediswerisa da siRatakis sidiadiso. karl emondsis ojaxSi ar igrZnoba msxverplis gaRebis, tanjvis, bediswerisa da siRatakis sidiade. karls sakmaod kargi xelfasi aqvs da Tu rame bediswerisa da siRatakis sidiadis gancdas iwvevda, es iyo mudmivi ukmayofileba imis gamo, rom, misi gamoangariSebiT, arasodes eqneboda Sesaferisi binis dasaqiravebeli Tanxa. roca davrwmundi, rom karl emondsi erTaderTi kacia, visac SemiZlia fuli davesesxo, cxadze ucxadesad damidga Tvalwin, ra dReSi viyavi, jibeSi pfenigic ki aRar medo. 22 winaswar vicodi, arafers movimoqmedebdi _ arc romSi gavemgzavrebodi da arc papTan meqneboda saubari, dedaCemis xvalindel Jurfiqsze arc sigaretebs moviparavdi da arc miwis TxiliT avivsebdi jibeebs. Zala aRar mqonda, yvelaferi es iseve damejerebina, rogorc is mjeroda, rom me da leom mori gavxerxeT. yoveli cda, isev gameskvna Zafebi da marionetiviT Camovkonwialebuliyavi, CasafuSavad iyo ganwiruli. odesme, albaT, iqamdec mival, rom fuls kinkelsac davesesxebi, zomervildsac da im sadist fredeboilsac, romelic xuTmarkian qaRalds cxvirwin amifrialebs da maiZulebs, aba, Sexti, Tu miswvdebio. gamixardeba, monika zilvsi yavaze Tu dampatiJebs da ara imitom, rom monika zilvsia, aramed imis gamo, rom yavas ufasod davlev. kidev erTxel davurekav im gonebaClung bela brozens, mivelaqucebi da aRar davuwyeb gamokiTxvas, ra Tanxis gaReba SeuZlia. vetyvi, sul mciresac sixaruliT miviReb-meTqi. sul bolos ki, erT mSvenier dRes, vewvevi zomervilds, `damajereblad~ davumtkiceb, vnanob, rac moxda, gons movege, sarwmunoebis gamosacvlelad movmwifdi-meTqi. yvelaze sazarelic swored am dros moxdeba: zomervildi marisTan da ciupfnerTan Cemi Semrigeblis rols gaiTamaSebs. magram sarwmunoebis gamocvlis Semdeg mamaCemi, albaT, sul aiRebs xels Cemze _ es xom misTvis yvelaze saSineli ramaa. saWiro iyo dafiqreba. arCevani rouge
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et noir-s1 Soris ki ar unda momexdina, aramed muqyavisfersa da Savs Soris: mura naxSirsa da eklesias Soris. bolos da bolos, gavxdebi iseTi, rogoric maT ukve didi xania surT, rom viyo: subieqtivizmisagan Tavisufali, obieqturi, mowifuli mamakaci, romelsac SeeZleba keTilSobilTa kavSirSi azartulad Caebas skatis TamaSSi. Tumca SesaZlebloba jer kidev ar iyo amowuruli. mrCebodnen: leo, hainrih beleni, babuaCemi da conereri, romelsac SeeZlo gitaris akompanementze sentimentaluri simRerebis Semsruleblad gadaveqcie. vimRerebdi `roca qari Sens Tmas eTamaSeba, vici, Cemi xar~. erTxel es simRera maris vumRere. man yurebi daico da miTxra, ufro saSineli araferi momismeniao. Tu Zalian gamiWirdeba, ukanasknel xerxs mivmarTav _ waval da im nomrebs, romlebic SeiZleba antikapitalisturad miiCnion, komunistebs vuCveneb. erTxel erfurtSi gavemgzavre, kulturisaTvis Tavdadebulma tipebma mimiwvies. me da maris didi zeimiT Segvxvdnen sadgurze, uzarmazari Taigulebi mogvarTves, sastumroSi moxarSuli kalmaxiT, xizilaliT, nayinian-naRebiani tortiT da SampanuriT gagvimaspinZldnen, gvkiTxes, ris naxvas isurvebTo erfurtSi. me vupasuxe, siamovnebiT vnaxavdi im adgils, sadac luTerma sadoqtoro disertacia daicva-meTqi, marim ki Tqva, gamigonia erfurtSi kaTolikur-Teologiuri fakulteti arsebobs da minda aqaur religiur cxovrebas gavecnoo. Cveni maspinZlebi moiRuSnen, magram ras izamdnen. yvelani uxerxul mdgomareobaSi aRmovCndiT: kulturis qomagnic, Teologebic da Cvenc. Teologebi fiqrobdnen, TiTqos Cven raRac saerTo gvqonda im idiotebTan da gulaxdilad arc erTi ar elaparakeboda maris, maSinac ki, roca erT profesors rwmenis sakiTxebze esaubreboda. profesori rogorRac mixvda, me da mari rom jvardauwerelni viyaviT, da maris partiuli muSakebis TandaswrebiT hkiTxa: _ ki magram, Tqven xom namdvili kaTolike xarT?
1

rouge et noir (fr.) _ wiTeli da Savi.

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mari sircxvilisagan gawiTlda da upasuxa: _ diax, maSinac ki var kaTolike, roca codvil cxovrebas vewevi. mdgomareoba kidev ufro gaamZafra iman, rom Cveni jvardauwerloba, Cans, arc partiul muSakebs moewonaT. mogvianebiT, roca yavis dasalevad sastumroSi davbrundiT, erTma maTganma laparaki wamoiwyo wvrilburJuaziuli anarqiis garkveuli formebis arsebobaze, rac ar moswonda. Semdeg mkiTxes, ris Cvenebas vapirebdi laifcigsa da rostokSi, xom ar vapirebdi iqaurebisaTvis `kardinalis~, `bonSi Casvlis~ da `sameTvalyureo sabWos sxdomis~ Cvenebas (verafriT mivxvdi, saidan gaiges, kardinalze rom pantomima mqonda Seqmnili. am nomerze bevri vimuSave da, maris garda, aravisTvis miCvenebia. marim mTxova, is mainc ar meCvenebina scenaze, kardinalebi xom isedac wamebulTa darad sisxliviT wiTel mantiaSi arian gaxveulnio). me Cvens maspinZlebs uari vuTxari, jer cotaTi mainc unda Seviswavlo aqauri cxovrebis pirobebi, komizmis azri xom is aris, adamianebs abstraqtuli formiT warmovudgino maTi cxovrebis sinamdvilidan aRebuli situaciebi da ara ucxo cxovreba. aq arc bonia, arc sameTvalyureo sabWoebi da arc kardinalebi-meTqi. Cveni maspinZlebi mousvenrobam Seipyro. erTi gafiTrda kidec da miTxra, Cven es yvelaferi sxvagvarad gvqonda warmodgenilio. mec-meTqi, vuTxari. mZime mdgomareoba Seiqmna. amitomac vTqvi, cotas mivixed-movixedav da Semdeg warmogidgenT romelime nomers: `saraiono komitetis sxdoma~, `kulturis sabWos Sekreba~, an `partiis yriloba prezidiums irCevs~, anda `erfurti yvavilebis qalaqia~. am dros ki erfurtis sadguris irgvliv yvavilebis mets yvelafers dainaxavda kaci. maSin maTi ufrosi wamodga da miTxra, Cven ver avitanT propagandas muSaTa klasis winaaRmdego. igi gafiTrebuli ki aRar iyo, aramed miwisferi edo. ramdenime maTgans mainc eyo imdeni vaJkacoba, rom iRriWebodnen. me maT vupasuxe, veraviTar propagandas ver vxedav muSaTa klasis winaaRmdeg imaSi, rom warmovadgino saxeldaxelod daswavlili nomeri `partiis yriloba
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prezidiums irCevs~. sisulele momivida, `bardiis yriloba~ wamomcda. amis gagonebaze im fanatikosma, miwisferi rom edo, ise magrad dahkra xeli magidas, rom namcxvris aTqvefili naRebi TefSidan Camomicurda, da Tqva: _ SevcdiT, SevcdiT, rom mogiwvieT. _ Tu asea, SemiZlia gavemgzavro. _ diax, SegiZliaT pirvelive matarebliT gaemgzavroT. me maT ganvucxade, SemiZlia Cems nomers _ `sameTvalyureo sabWo~ _ `raionuli komitetis sxdoma~ davarqva, radgan iqac, albaT, iseT sakiTxebs wyveten, adreve rom iyo ukve gadawyvetili-meTqi. axla ki swored rom uzrdelad moiqcnen, patara darbazi ise datoves, Cveni yavis safasuric ki ar gadaixades. mari tiroda, me mzad viyavi vinmesaTvis sila gamewna, xolo roca sadguris gzas davadeqiT, raTa pirvelive matarebliT gavmgzavrebuliyaviT erfurtidan, verc bargis wamRebi viSoveT da verc momxmare biWi. Cemodnebis Treva Cven mogvixda. aseTi ram ki WiriviT mezareba. sabednierod, sadguris moedanTan erT-erTi im axalgazrda TeologTagani Segvxvda, visTanac maris diliT saubari hqonda. Cvens danaxvaze Teologi gawiTlda da atirebul maris xelidan mZime Cemodani gamoarTva. mari mTeli gza eCurCuleboda, Cven gamo mZime mdgomareobaSi nu CaigdebT Tavso. es iyo saSineleba. erfurtSi sul eqvsi Tu Svidi saaTi davyaviT, magram urTierToba yvelasTan gagvifuWda, TeologebTanac da partiul muSakebTanac. bolos bebraSi CamovxtiT da sastumros mivaSureT, mari mTeli Rame tiroda. diliT grZeli werili miswera Teologs, magram Cven verafriT gavigeT, miiRo man es werili Tu ara. vfiqrobdi, marisTan da ciupfnerTan Serigebaze uaresi ra iqneba-meTqi, magram gafiTrebuli fanatikosis zedamxedvelobis qveS cxovreba da iqaurebisaTvis `kardinalis~ Cveneba kidev ufro uaresi iqneboda. mTlad wyalwaRebuli jer kidev ar viyavi; myavda leo, hainrih beleni, monika zilvsi, conereri, babuaCemi da sabine emondsi, visTanac Cemi wili wvniani meguleboda. garda amisa, bavSvebs mivxedavdi da cota fuls am gziTac viSovidi. xelwerils davdeb, rom bavSvebs kvercxs
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aRar vaWmev. etyoba, germaneli dedisaTvis es autanelia. fexebze mkidia, rasac sxvebi xelovnebis obieqtur mniSvnelobas uwodeben, magram iq, sadac araviTari sameTvalyureo sabWo ar arsebobs, sameTvalyureo sabWos masxrad agdeba uxamsobad mimaCnia. erTxel sakmaod grZeli pantomima `generali~ SevTxze. nomerze didxans vmuSaobdi da, roca warmovadgine, imas mivaRwie, rasac Cvens wreebSi warmatebas eZaxian _ ese igi, xalxis is nawili icinoda, visac unda ecina, da is nawili brazobda, vinc unda gagulisebuliyo. warmodgenis Semdeg amayad gaveSure sapirfareSosaken, sadac Cia dedaberi damxvda. am dros yovelTvis gaRizianebuli viyavi da maris mets veravis vitandi, magram dedaberi swored marim SemouSva Cems sapirfareSoSi. sanam kars bolomde mivxuravdi, dedaberma laparaki daiwyo. gamomicxada, Cemi qmaric generali iyo, omSi daiRupa da sikvdilis win werili momwera, mTxova, pensiaze uari Tqvio. _ Tqven jer Zalian axalgazrda xarT, magram sakmaod mowifuli, rom es gaigoT, _ miTxra dedaberma da sapirfareSodan gavida. im dRidan `generali~ aRar warmomidgenia. presa, romelic Tavis Tavs memarcxenes ewodebs, amis Semdeg werda, TiTqos reaqciam SemaSina, xolo presa, Tavis Tavs memarjvened rom moixseniebs, werda, TiTqos mivxvdi, amiT aRmosavleTs rom vuwevdi samsaxurs. damoukidebeli presa ki yovelgvar radikalizmsa da valdebulebaze xelis aRebas misayvedurebda. yovelive es wminda wylis sisulele iyo. am nomris warmodgena imitom veRar SevZeli, rom uneburad magondeboda is Cia dedaberi, gaWirvebiT rom irCenda Tavs da romelsac, albaT, yvela masxrad igdebda da dascinoda. roca esa Tu is saqme siamovnebas aRar mgvris, Tavs vanebeb _ albaT, Zalian rTulia, es Jurnalistebs auxsna. isini mxolod TavianT `alRos~ endobian da yvelgan raRacis `suni scemT~. arsebobs gaborotebuli Jurnalistis friad gavrcelebuli nairsaxeoba, romelic ver xvdeba, rom piradad is xelovani ar aris da arc araviTari monacemi gaaCnia saamisod; raki asea, raRa
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Tqma unda, alRo RalatobT da sisuleleebs roSaven, gansakuTrebiT, axalgazrda, lamazi gogoebis TandaswrebiT, jer kidev sakmaod miamitebi rom arian da yvela mjRabnelisaTvis Wkuas kargaven, aqaoda, romeliRac gazeTSi Tavisi `tribuna~ aqvs da `zegavlenas~ axdenso. arsebobs prostituciis ucnauri, jer kidev amouxsneli formebi. maTTan SedarebiT Cveulebrivi prostitucia keTilsindisieri xelobaa. yovel SemTxvevaSi, fulis sazRaurad raRacas mainc iZlevian. magram CemTvis xsnis is gzac daxSuli iyo, sadac gulmowyale siyvaruls yidian. fuli ar mqonda. am dros ki, albaT, mari romis sastumroSi espanur mantilias irgebs tanze _ germanuli kaTolicizmis first lady-s warmomadgenlobiTi ieri unda hqondes! xolo roca bonSi dabrundeba, miva yvela saRamoze, sadac Caize dapatiJeben, yvelas RimiliT Sexvdeba, gaxdeba aTasgvari komitetis wevri, gaxsnis `religiuri xelovnebis~ gamofenebs da daiwyebs `rigiani mkeravis~ Zebnas. yvela qali, vinc bonSi oficialur pirze Txovdeba, `rigiani mkeravis~ Zebnas iwyebs. maris, germaneli kaTolicizmis first lady-s, xelSi Cais finjani an koqteiliT savse Wiqa uWiravs da ambobs: `Tu naxeT patara, momxibvleli kardinali, romelic xval kriogerTis mier daproeqtebul mariamis svets akurTxebs? ah, italiaSi kardinalebic ki kavalrebi arian. saocrad momxibvleli kacia~. me ukve wesierad koWlobac ki aRar SemeZlo. xoxvas ukeT vaxerxebdi da ase, xoxva-xoxviT, gavedi aivanze mSobliuri qalaqis sufTa haeris SesasunTqad, magram verc aman miSvela. bonSi ukve didxans davyavi, TiTqmis ori saaTi, bonis haeri ki amdeni xnis Semdeg Tavis keTilismyofel gavlenas kargavs. mari rom kaTolike darCa, amas isini me unda mimadlodnen, gavifiqre uecrad. misma rwmenam ramdenime mZime krizisi gadaitana, radgan kinkelma da zomervildma imedi gaucrues, xolo rac Seexeba bloTertisTana tips, igi wminda francisksac ki aTeistad gadaaqcevda. marim erTxans eklesiaSi siarulic ki miatova, TavSi aRar gauvlia, eklesiaSi jvari dagvewera. maSin igi raRacnairma sijiutem Seipyro da, Tumca ganuwyvetliv
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epatiJebodnen, maT wres mxolod bonidan Cveni wamosvlidan sami wlis Semdeg daubrunda. maSin me maris vuTxari: imedgacrueba jer kidev arafers niSnavs. Tu es saqme WeSmaritebad migaCnia, aTasi fredeboilic ki ver aqcevs mas saeWvod. dabolos, xom arsebobs ciupfneri. marTalia, amgvari tipebi me ar momwons, cota ucxvirpiroa, magram rogorc kaTolike, ndobas imsaxurebs. maT Soris uTuod moiZebneba bevri iseTi kaTolike, ndobas rom imsaxurebs-meTqi, da CamovuTvale yvela pastori, visi qadagebac erTad mogvismenia, movagone papi, hari kuperi, alek ginesi. mari xviarasaviT CaeWida pap ioanesa da ciupfners da kvlav igrZno fexqveS niadagi. gasaocaria, im dros hainrih beleni aRar moswonda, piriqiT, marwmunebda, binZuriao, da roca masze Camovagdebdi sityvas, ise Secbundeboda, eWvi mepareboda, maris rame xom ar `gaubeda~-meTqi. cxadia, marisTvis es arasodes mikiTxavs, magram safuZvliani eWvi mqonda. sakmarisi iyo, kacs hainrihis ekonomi qali warmoedgina, rom mimxvdariyo _ axalgazrda qalebisaTvis SeeZlo marTlac `gaebeda~ rame. amis gafiqrebac ki mzaravda, magram gagebiT ki iseve mesmoda, rogorc mravali sisaZagle, rac Cvens internatSi xdeboda. mxolod axla gamielva fiqrma, rom me viyavi is kaci, romelmac maris religiuri eWvebis gasafantavad papi da ciupfneri SesTavaza. kaTolicizms uaRresad wesierad moveqeci, rac Secdomad mimaCnia, magram maris kaTolikoba imdenad bunebrivi meCveneboda, rom mindoda es bunebrioba SeenarCunebina. amitom, roca Zils Tavs ver arTmevda da eklesiaSi agviandeboda, vaRviZebdi. wirvisTvis rom mieswro, xSirad taqsiT vistumrebdi. roca iseT mxareSi vxvdebodiT, sadac protestantizmia fexmokidebuli, telefoniT vrekavdi yvelgan, rom wminda mesa aRmomeCina misTvis. aseT SemTxvevebSi meubneboda, `saocrad~ mixaria, amas rom akeTebo, magram Semdeg momTxova, xeli momewera im wyeul qaRaldze da werilobiTi piroba damedo, rom Svilebs kaTolikeebad aRvazrdevinebdi. Svilebze xSirad gvilaparakia. mixaroda, rom bavSvebi gveyoleboda. bevrjer SvilebTanac misaubria, xelSi amiyvania, maTTvis rZeSi
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umi kvercxi Camixlia. mxolod is mawuxebda, rom sastumroSi vcxovrobdiT, sadac kargad mxolod milionerebisa da mefeebis Svilebs epyrobian, xolo imaT Svilebs, vinc arc milioneria da arc mefe, gansakuTrebiT ki biWebs, imTaviTve uyvirian: `aq Seni saxli nu ggonia~. es ki aRzrdis TvalsazrisiT sammagad mcdaria: jer erTi, igulisxmeba, rom bavSvi Tavis saxlSi RoriviT iqceva; meore, bavSvi mxolod maSin grZnobs Tavs kargad, roca RoriviT iqceva da mesamec, bavSvma arasodes unda igrZnos Tavi kargad. gogonebs xSirad bedi swyalobT, `momxibvlel~ arsebebad miaCniaT da kargadac epyrobian, magram biWebs, Tu mSoblebi iqve ar trialeben, yovelTvis uyvirian. germanelebisaTvis yvela biWi uzrdelia. zedsarTavs `uzrdeli~ xmamaRla arc ki warmoTqvamen _ is ubralod am arsebiT saxelTanaa Serwymuli. vinmes rom moafiqrdes da Caukvirdes, ra sityvebs xmarobs mSobelTa umetesoba SvilebTan saubarSi, darwmundeba, rom maT leqsikasTan SedarebiT ilustrirebuli gazeTis leqsika lamis Zmebi grimebis leqsikons utoldeba. ar gaivlis didi dro da germaneli mSoblebi TavianT bavSvebs qalbatoni qalikis eniT daelaparakebian: `o, ra mSvenieria~, `o, ra sisaZaglea~. SeiZleba zogjer ufro daxvewili azric wamoscdeT, magaliTad: `krinti ar daZra!~ anda `amisi araferi gagegeba!~. me da mari imazec vlaparakobdiT, ras CavacmevdiT bavSvebs. maris `Ria feris labadebi~ moswonda. me anorakebis1 momxre viyavi. Cemi azriT, Tu bavSvs eleganturi labada acvia, gubeSi ver iTamaSebs, xolo sportuli kurtaki am saqmisaTvis zedgamoWrilia. garda amisa, Tbilad Cacmul bavSvs _ me yovelTvis gogona myavda mxedvelobaSi _ mxolod fexebi eqneboda daufaravi. roca gubeSi qvebs Cayrida, Sxefebi mxolod kanWebs dausvelebda da anoraks ar moxvdeboda, xolo roca Tunuqis kolofiT gubidan WuWyian wyals amoxapavda da piramde gavsebuli kolofidan wyals gadmoRvrida, aucilebeli ar iyo anorakze gadaesxa, yovel SemTxvevaSi, ufro savaraudoa, rom fexebs daisvelebda. maris azriT ki, roca gogona Ria fe1

anoraki (germ.) _ qarSi Casacmeli kapiuSoniani kurtaki.

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ris labadaSi iqneboda gamowyobili, met sifrTxiles gamoiCenda. gadauwyveteli mxolod is sakiTxi darCa, mivcemdiT Tu ara Svilebs gubeSi TamaSis uflebas. maris mxolod eRimeboda, pasuxs Tavs aridebda da meubneboda, jobia davicadoTo. Tu maris ciupfnerisagan eyoleba Svilebi, verc anoraks Caacmevs da verc Ria feris elegantur labadas, radgan me da marim dawvrilebiT visaubreT ukve bavSvis yovelgvar zeda tansacmelze. amitom misi Svilebi upaltood da ukurtakod irbenen. vilaparakeT, agreTve, grZel da mokle Sarvlebze, sacvlebze, windebze, fexsacmelze da, Tu surda Tavi arc meZavad egrZno da arc moRalated, bavSvebi titlikana unda etarebina bonSi. arc is vicodi, ra unda eWmia bavSvebisaTvis: Cven dawvrilebiT vmsjelobdiT yovelgvar sursaTze, kvebis yvela meTodze da am daskvnamde mivediT: ar CavasxamdiT bavSvebs pirSi fafas da ar gavWyepdiT rZiT. araviTari survili ar mqonda bavSvebisaTvis saWmeli dagveZalebina. guli mereoda, roca vuyurebdi, rogor atenida sabine emondsi saWmels pirvel or Svils, gansakuTrebiT ufross, romelsac karlma saocari saxeli edelTrudi daarqva. im dawyevlili kvercxis gamo marisac ki SevekamaTe. mari kvercxis winaaRmdegi iyo da, roca vkamaTobdiT, uecrad wamoscda, kvercxi mdidari xalxis saWmeliao. Semdeg gawiTlda da meve momixda misi damSvideba. miCveuli viyavi imas, rom adamianebi sxvagvarad mepyrobodnen _ sxvagvarad miyurebdnen imis gamo, rom mura naxSiris mrewvelTa STamomavali viyavi. marim mxolod orjer ver Seikava Tavi da amis Sesaxeb raRac sisuleleebi Tqva: pirvelad im dRes, roca samzareuloSi Sevedi, da meored, roca kvercxis gamo vdaobdiT. saSinelebaa, roca mdidari mSoblebi gyavs, magram kidev ufro meti saSinelebaa, roca am simdidreSi wili ar gidevs. kvercxebs saxlSi iSviaTad gvaWmevdnen _ dedaCemi maT `uaRresad mavnebel produqtad~ Tvlida. edgar vinekeni ki, piriqiT, imis gamo grZnobda uxerxulobas, rom yvelgan dahyavdaT da yvelas acnobdnen, rogorc muSis Svils, is ki arada, zogierTi mRvdelic ki ase acnobda edgars xalxs: namdvilze namdvili muSis Sviliao. maT sityvebSi faruli
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azri ido: SexedeT am biWs, arc rqebi aqvs da inteligenturadac gamoiyurebao. es ambavic rasobriv sakiTxs ganekuTvneba da mis gadasawyvetad dedaCemis centralurma komitetma unda imtvrios Tavi. am mxriv Cem mimarT mxolod vinekenebi da maris mama iCendnen miukerZoeblobas, arasodes mayvedridnen, mura naxSiris mwarmoebeli Snirebis STamomavali rom viyavi da arc gvirgviniT mamkobdnen amis gamo. 23 bolos mivxvdi, isev aivanze videqi da bons gadavyurebdi. muxli ise Zlier mtkioda, rom moajirs magrad CaveWide, magram im erTi markis dardi, fanjridan rom gadavisrole, mainc ar masvenebda. siamovnebiT movZebnidi, magram axla Zirs ver Cavidodi. leos yovel wams SeeZlo mosuliyo, odesme xom unda moeRoT bolo qliavis, aTqvefili naRebisa da sufraze RmerTis xsenebisaTvis. ver iqna da ver davinaxe Cemi marka quCaSi. trotuaridan sakmaod didi manZiliT viyavi daSorebuli, monetebi ki mxolod zRaprebSi brwyinaven ise sagangebod, rom maTi povna SeZlo. es pirveli SemTxveva iyo, roca menaneboda raRac iseTi, rac fulTanaa dakavSirebuli. menaneboda dakarguli marka _ Tormeti sigareti, tramvais ori bileTi an sosisiani puris naWeri. amave dros, usinanulod, magram erTgvari gulis tkiviliT vfiqrobdi, ramdeni fuli gadagvixdia qvemosaqsoneli dedabrebis magivrad pirveli klasis vagonebsa da Cqar matareblebSi. albaT, amgvari gulistkiviliT fiqrobs kaci im gogonaze, romelsac uamravi kocna miuZRvna, is ki sxvaze gaTxovda. leos imediT ver viqnebodi, mas ucnauri warmodgena hqonda fulze, daaxloebiT iseTi, rogoric monazons aqvs `colqmrul siyvarulze~. Tumca irgvliv yvelaferi gakaSkaSebuli iyo, quCaSi araferi brwyinavda, araviTari varskvlava taleri. vxedavdi mxolod avtomanqanebs, tramvais, avtobusebs da bonel moqalaqeebs. vimedovnebdi, rom Cemi marka tramvais saxuravze daeca da depoSi vinme ipovis. cxadia, SemeZlo evangelisturi eklesiis kalTas amovfare220

bodi, magram roca es kalTa warmovidgine, gamaJrJola. luTeris kalTas siamovnebiT amovefarebodi, `evangelisturi eklesiis kalTas~ ki vera. Tu mliqvneli gavxdebi, jobia, am mliqvnelobisagan raime sargebloba vnaxo da rac SeiZleba meti siamovneba miviRo. nasiamovnebi ki maSin viqnebi, roca sxvebs kaToliked movaCveneb Tavs. eqvsi Tve `aravis davenaxvebi~, Semdeg ki saRamoobiT zomervildis qadagebebze daviwyeb siaruls da CemSi iseve afuTfuTdebian kaTolonebi, rogorc iaraSi matlebi. magram amiT mamaCemis gulis mogebis ukanasknel SesaZleblobas da mura naxSiris trestis romelime filialSi Cekze xelis moweris uflebas davkargav. iqneb dedaCemma Tavis centralur komitetSi momawyos, sadac SesaZlebloba meqneba Cemi rasobrivi Teoriebi davicva. gavemgzavrebi amerikaSi, qalTa klubebs gamovecxadebi, rogorc germaneli axalgazrdobis monaniebis cocxali magaliTi da moxsenebebs wavikiTxav. mxolod erTi ram mawuxebs: piradad me mosananiebeli araferi maqvs, sruliad araferi da amitom iZulebuli viqnebi, viTvalTmaqco. Tumca SemiZlia movyve, rogor Sevayare CogburTis kortze herberT qaliks saxeSi mTeli muWa nacari, rogor Camketes tirSi da rogor warvdeqi sasamarTlos winaSe, romlis SemadgenlobaSic Sediodnen qaliki, briuli da liovenihi. magram amis moyolac TvalTmaqcoba iqneba. ar SeiZleba amgvari momentebis aRwera da kiserze ordeniviT Camokideba. yvela cdilobs, Tavisi cxovrebis gmiruli momentebi ordeniviT ataros. warsuls rom CaebRauWebi, esec farisevlobaa, radgan kaciSvilma ar uwyis is momentebi: aba, vis ecodineba, lurjqudiani henrieTe tramvaiSi rom Cajda da leverkuzenSi gaemgzavra wminda germanuli miwis ebraeli iankebisagan dasacavad. ara, yvelaze saimedo farisevloba, Tanac friad rom gamarTobda, mainc `kaTolikuri kartiT TamaSia~. aq naRdi mogeba gaqvs xelSi. kidev erTxel gadavxede universitetis saxuravebs da sasaxlis parkis xeivnebs: mari icxovrebs maT miRma, mTis ferdobze, bonsa da godesbergs Soris. keTili da patiosani. amitom
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jobs, aq viyo. ar aris saWiro, gavuadvilo cxovreba. ratom unda fiqrobdes, TiTqos mudam gzaSi var? jobs axsovdes, rom yovel wuTs SeiZleba Semxvdes. dae, daiwvas sircxvilisagan imis gafiqrebaze, rom mTeli misi cxovreba uzneoba da qmris Ralatia. xolo Tu bavSvebTan erTad Semxvdeba da bavSvebs anorakebi da lodenis paltoebi ecmevaT, sakuTari bavSvebi maSinve SiSvlebi moeCveneba. mowyaleo qalbatono, qalaqSi xmebi dadis, TiTqos Tqvens bavSvebs dediSobila arbeninebT. es ukve metismetia. garda amisa, erTi didi Secdomac dauSviT, gadamwyvet wuTSi sityva `Cemi~ gamogrCaT. roca ambobT, mxolod erTi kaci miyvarso, unda TqvaT `Cemi kaci~. iseTi xmebic dadis, rom Tqven geRimebaT im yru siZulvilze, yvelani rom grZnoben imisadmi, visac moxucs eZaxian. Tqveni azriT, yvelani amazrzenad hgvanan mas. bolos da bolos, im moxuci kancleriviT maTac hgoniaT, rom Seucvlelni arian, da Tanac yvelani xom kriminalur romanebs kiTxuloben. ra Tqma unda, kriminaluri romanebis ydebi ar Seefereba gemovnebiT mowyobil binebs. danielebs daaviwydaT, TavianTi stili kriminaluri romanebis ydebzec gaevrcelebinaT. finelebs ki, albaT, eyofaT imdeni eSmakoba, rom ydebi skamebs, savarZlebs, minasa da keramikas Seufardon. kriminaluri romanebi bloTertsac ki uyria saxlSi. im saRamos, mis binas rom vaTvalierebdi, lamis TvalSi gveCxirebodnen utifrad. mudam sibneles efarebiT, mowyaleo qalbatono, kinoebsa da eklesiebSi dadixarT, Cabnelebul oTaxSi saeklesio musikas ismenT, xolo dRis sinaTles, iseTs, rogoric CogburTis kortebzea, ufrTxiT. didi miTqma-moTqmaa. taZarSi aRsareba ocdaaT, ormocdaaT wuTs grZeldeba. momlodineTa TvalebSi aRSfoTeba igrZnoba: `RmerTo Cemo, ra aqvs amdeni mosananiebeli am qals: hyavs ulamazesi, usaTnoesi da uwesieresi meuRle, namdvilad znemaRali adamiani da mSvenieri gogona, aqvs ori avtomanqana~. saaRsarebos miRma mdgari, mouTmenlobiT Sepyrobili xalxi gaRizianebulia, ori xma ki dausruleblad CurCulebs
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siyvarulze, qorwinebaze, movaleobaze, isev siyvarulze da bolos ismis aseTi kiTxva. _ rwmenaSi arasodes daeWvebulxarT, maS, raRa gindaT, Svilo Cemo? Sen xmamaRla ar SegiZlia imis Tqma, gafiqrebac ki giWirs imisi, rac me vici. Sen ginda klouni, oficialurad: profesionali komikosi msaxiobi, arc erT eklesias rom ar uxdis xarks. saxeze rom grimi damedo, aivnidan saabazanoSi koWlobiT gavedi. Secdoma davuSvi, mamas rom ugrimod davxvdi, magram mis stumrobas arafriT velodi. leo yovelTvis mowadinebulia, Cemi namdvili fiqri, Cemi namdvili saxe, Cemi namdvili `me~ dainaxos. dae, dainaxos. magram roca saxeze grimi ar medo, leos yovelTvis eSinoda Cemi `niRbebis~, TamaSis, yovelive imisa, rasac igi `fuqsavaturs~ eZaxis. im wuTebSi ki Cemi Cemodani grimiT sadRac boxumsa da bons Soris mixriginebda. saabazanoSi kedlis patara, TeTri karada gamovaRe da SevkrTi, magram gvianRa iyo. rogor damaviwyda, rom nivTebs momakvdinebeli sentimentaloba axasiaTebT. karadaSi aRar iyo maris tubebi, qilebi, SuSebi, aRaraferi... karadaSi rom aRaraferi damxvda, aman ise amaforiaqa, TiTqos misi romelime tubi an qila damenaxos. yvelaferi Tan wauRia. iqneb, monika zilvsma gamoiCina gulkeTiloba, yvelafers Tavi mouyara da aqaurobas moaSora. sarkeSi Cemi Tavi SevaTvaliere: Tvalebi sruliad carieli mqonda. es iyo pirveli SemTxveva, Tvalebis dacarieleba rom ar damWirvebia. adre amisaTvis naxevari saaTi vaSterdebodi sakuTar Tavs da saxis kunTebs vavarjiSebdi. sarkidan TviTmkvlelis saxe miyurebda, xolo roca grimis dadeba daviwye, saxe mkvdris saxed meqca. kani jer vazeliniT davizile, Semdeg naxevrad gamxmar umarilis tubs Tavi movaglije da saxe ise gaviTeTre, rom arc erTi Savi xazi, arc erTi wiTeli wertili ar damimatebia. saxe erTianad TeTri mqonda, warbebzec ki gadavisvi umarili. Tma parikiviT medo Tavze, SeuRebavi
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tuCebi Camuqebuli, TiTqmis lurji ferisa iyo, Tvalebi gaqvavebul casaviT cisferi da im kardinalis TvalebiviT carieli, romelmac didi xania dakarga rwmena da es ambavi sakuTari TavisTvisac ki ver gaumxelia. Cemi anareklisa aRar meSinoda. aseTi saxis patronisaTvis Zneli ar aris `karieris gakeTeba~, aseTi saxiT im saqmis dacvac SeiZleba farisevlurad, romelic, miuxedavad mTeli misi absurdulobisa da uazrobisa, SedarebiT mimzidvelia. im saqmes vgulisxmob, edgar vinekens rom swams. yovel SemTxvevaSi, am saqmes arafris gemo ar dahkravs, yvelaze patiosnuria sayovelTao upatiosnebaSi da yvelaze mcire borotebaa umcires borotebaTa Soris. amgvarad, garda Savisa, muqi yavisfrisa da lurjisa, arsebobs kidev erTi SesaZlebloba. wiTels ver vuwodebT mas _ metismetad evfemisturi da optimisturi iqneboda. esaa nacrisferi, romelsac gariJraJis sxivi dahkravs. mwuxare feria, mwuxare saqmis Sesaferisi, magram SeiZleba swored aq gamoinaxos adgili klounisaTvis, romelmac yvelaze saSineli codva Caidina: sxvebSi sibralulis grZnoba gamoiwvia. cudi mxolod is iyo, rom yvelaze naklebad edgaris motyueba mindoda, yvelaze metad masTan miWirda TvalTmaqcoba. me erTaderTi mowme viyavi imisa, rom man marTlac gairbina asi metri 10,1 wamSi, xolo igi erTaderTi iyo im mcirericxovan adamianTa Soris, vinc iseTad micnobda, rogoric viyavi, iseTi vegone, rogoric var. edgars araferi swamda, garda garkveuli adamianebisa. sxvebs meti ram swamT: RmerTi, abstraqtuli fuli da is, rasac `saxelmwifo~ da `germania~ hqvia. edgars ki araferi amdagvari ar swamda. amitomac daeca Tavzari, me rom maSin taqsi daviqirave. axla guli mwydeba, ratom ar avuxseni yvelaferi, Torem ise sul ara var valdebuli, vinmes rame avuxsna. sarkes movcildi. Zalian momewona is saxe, sarkidan rom mimzerda. wuTiTac ar momsvlia azrad, rom is, visac vumzerdi, me viyavi. es klouni ki ara, mkvdari kaci iyo, romelic mkvdarsave ganasaxierebda. saZinebel oTaxSi koWlobiT Sevlaslasdi. aqamde am oTaxSi jer fexi ar Semidgams maris kabebis SiSiT. kabebs misTvis metwilad me vyidulobdi da, Tu kaba gadasakeTebeli iyo, mkera224

vTanac me mivdiodi mosalaparakeblad. garda wiTlisa da Savisa, TiTqmis yvela feri uxdeboda, nacrisferic ki ar ukargavda iers. gansakuTrebiT uxdeboda vardisferi da mwvane. qalebis modis saqmes rom gavyolodi, albaT, fulsac gavakeTebdi, magram iseTi kacisaTvis, romelic monogamia da homoseqsualisti ar aris, es saSineli wameba iqneboda. mamakacTa umravlesoba cols Ceks aZlevs da urCevs, `modis karnaxs~ daemorCilos. roca modaSi iisferi Semodis, CekiT gamokvebili colebi iisfers icvamen. da roca qalbatonebi, romelTac `Tavebi moaqvT~, uklebliv yvelani, romelime wveulebaze iisfer kabebSi gamowyobilni mimodian, iseTi grZnoba geufleba, TiTqos mdedrobiTi sqesis episkoposebis generalur asambleaze aRmoCndi, im episkoposebisa, romelTa sxeulebSi Zlivs feTqavs sicocxle. mari maT ricxvs ar ekuTvnis. jer kidev Cems saxlSi vcxovrobdi, roca modaSi tomara-kabebi Semovida da yvela batistvina dedakaci, romelTac qmrebma `mdgomareobis Sesabamisad~ Semosva ubrZanes, Cvens Jurfiqsebze tomaraSi gaxveuli daZunZulebda. zogi marTla mecodeboda, gansakuTrebiT, erTerTi prezidentis (Cvens saxlSi prezidentebs ra gamolevda) ZonZroxa coli. siamovnebiT mivuaxlovdebodi im qals da ise movaxuravdi rames, sufras an fardas, rogorc gulmowyalebis mosasxams. misi briyvi da xvadagi qmari verafers amCnevda, yru da brma iyo. SeeZlo coli vardisferi Ramis perangiT Semosili gaegzavna bazarSi, Tuki romelime homoseqsualisti ganacxadebda _ es modaSiao. meore dRes ki ormocdaaT evangelist pastors leqcias waukiTxavda Temaze: `Secnobis roli qorwinebaSi~. man, albaT, isic ki ar icoda, rom mis cols wyvetiani muxlebi hqonda da mokle kaba ar uxdeboda. sarkisaTvis rom Tvali ameridebina, tansacmlis karadis kari swrafad gamovaRe. maris araferi, araferi daetovebina karadaSi, arc fexsacmlis kalapoti da arc qamari, rac qalebs xSirad rCebaT xolme. jer ar gamqraliyo misi sunamos suni. SeeZlo meti lmobiereba gamoeCina, Cemi tansacmelic Tan waeRo an viRacebisTvis eCuqebina, anda daewva, magram Cemi Cvrebi karadaSi isev ise ekida: mwvane velvetis Sarvali, romelic
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arasodes mcmia, tvidis Savi pijaki da ramdenime yelsaxvevi. qveviT ki, fexsacmelebis Taroze, sami wyvili fexsacmeli elaga. albaT, patara ujraSic yvelaferi Tavis adgilas ido _ manJetebis sakinZeebi, sayeloebis TeTri kuTxedebi, windebi da cxvirsaxocebi. winaswar unda mcodnoda, rom kerZo sakuTrebis mimarT qristianebi Seurigeblad patiosnebi arian. ujrebis gamoReba saWiro ar iyo: yvelaferi, rac me mekuTvnoda, adgilze ideboda. ar iqneboda mxolod is, rac misi sakuTreba iyo. udides sulgrZelobas gamoiCenda, Cemi Cvrebic rom Tan waeRo, magram tansacmlis karadaSi samarTlianoba da momakvdinebeli koreqtuloba batonobda. roca maris karadidan gamohqonda yvelaferi, rac mis arsebobas momagonebda, albaT, TanamigrZnobda, SeiZleba tiroda kidec im qalebiviT, colqmris gayris amsaxvel filmebSi rom amboben: `SenTan gatarebuli dReebi arasodes damaviwydeba~. yvelaze cudi, rac marim damitova, es iyo sufTa da dalagebuli karada (viRacas mtveric ki gadaewminda). man yvelaferi samarTlianad gayo, karadaSi Cemi tansacmeli ekida, misi ki ara. karada im saoperacios hgavda, sadac operacia warmatebiT Caatares. marisi aq arsad araferi Canda, kofTaze awyvetili Rilic ki. sarkeSi rom Cemi Tavi ar damenaxa, karadis kari Ria davtove, samzareuloSi koWlobiT gavedi, koniakis boTli pijakis jibeSi Cavide, saerTo oTaxSi taxtze wamovweqi da Sarvlis toti avikapiwe. muxli kidev ufro gamsiveboda, magram wamowolils naklebad mtkioda. kolofSi oTxi sigaretiRa iyo. erTs movukide. vfiqrobdi, ra iqneboda uaresi _ maris rom kabebi daetovebina, Tu is, rac gaakeTa: pirwmindad gamoacariela karada, daasufTava da baraTic ki ar damitova: `SenTan gatarebuli dReebi arasodes damaviwydeba~. albaT, ase jobda, magram SeeZlo, awyvetili Rili an qamari mainc daetovebina, anda mTeli karada waeRo Tan da daewva. roca henrieTes daRupvis cnoba miviReT, swored im dros Cvens saxlSi sufras Slidnen da anam yviTel saxelsaxoce
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rgolSi gayrili henrieTes naxmari xelsaxoci servantze datova. yvela mivaCerdiT xelsaxocs _ mas cotaodeni muraba ecxo da wvnianisa Tu saweblis patara yavisferi laqebi aCnda. pirvelad vigrZeni, ra saSinelebaa im adamianis kuTvnili nivTebi, romelic samudamod midis saxlidan an kvdeba. dedam arc acia, arc acxela, Wamas Seudga. amiT undoda eTqva: cxovreba grZeldebao an rame amdagvari, magram me zustad vicodi, rom es ase ar iyo. cxovreba ki ara, sikvdili grZeldeboda. dedas sufris kovzi xelidan gavagdebine. baRSi gavvardi, Semdeg ukanve SemoviWeri saxlSi, sadac saSineli wivil-kivili da wyevla-krulva iyo amtydari. dedaCems cxelma wvnianma saxe dauwva. me henrieTes oTaxSi avvardi, fanjara farTod gavaRe da yvelaferi, rac xelSi momyva, baRSi gadavyare: patara kolofebi, kabebi, Tojinebi, qudebi, fexsacmelebi da beretebi. gamovaRe ujrebi. Sig TeTreuli ewyo. TeTreuls Soris ucnauri, albaT, misTvis Zvirfasi patara nivTebi elaga _ xorblis gamxmari TavTavebi, qvebi, yvavilebi, qaRaldis naglejebi da vardisferi bafTiT Sekruli werilebis mTeli dasta. xelis erTi mosmiT baRSi gadavuZaxe CogburTis fexsacmelebi, Cognebi, sportul jildoebi. mogvianebiT leom miTxra, `giJs~ hgavdio. yvelaferi es ise swrafad momimoqmedebia, rom xelis SeSla veravin gabeda. ujrebs erTianad vapirqvavebdi baRSi. Semdeg garaJSi Sevvardi, benziniT savse mZime baloni gamovitane, henrieTes nivTebs gadavasxi da cecxli wavukide. yvelaferi, rac irgvliv iyo mimobneuli, avardnil alSi fexiT Sevyare. Semdeg movxvete nakuwebi, nafleTebi, gamxmari yvavilebi, werilebis dasta da isic cecxls miveci. bolos sasadilo oTaxSi Sevvardi, servantidan henrieTes rgolSi gayrili xelsaxoci aviRe da isic cecxlSi gadavuZaxe. mogvianebiT leom miTxra, mTeli es ambavi xuT wuTze metxans ar gagrZelebula da sanam vinme mixvdeboda, ra moxda, cecxli ukve gizgizebda da yvelafers nTqavdao. am dros saidanRac amerikeli oficeri gamoCnda. mas egona, saidumlo masalebs vwvavdi, didi germaniis `vervolfis~ masalebs, magram roca baRSi gavida, TiTqmis yvelaferi damwvari daxvda. gaSavebuli muguzlebi sazarlad
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yarda. amerikelma oficerma moindoma cecxlisTvis gamoetaca werilebis dasta, magram xelidan gavagdebine da balonSi darCenili benzini cecxlze davasxi. cota xnis Semdeg saxanZro razmic mogrialda Tavisi sasacilo, didi SlangebiT, baRSi ki erTma mexanZrem xmamaRla gasca yvelaze sasacilo brZaneba, rogoric ki odesme msmenia: `wyalo, iar!~ isini usircxvilod asxamdnen SlangebiT wyals am ubadruk kocons, xolo roca erTma mexanZrem SeamCnia, cecxli odnav fanjris rafasac moedoo, Slangi fanjrisaken mimarTa: oTaxSi yvelaferi ativtivda, parketis iataki daibrica da dedaCemma wivil-kivili atexa. daiwyo rekva yvela damzRvev sazogadoebaSi, undoda gaego, ra erqva amas _ cecxlisagan dazaraleba, wylisagan dazaraleba Tu dazRveuli qonebis dazianeba. erTi ylupi koniaki pirdapir boTlidan movsvi, Semdeg boTli isev jibeSi Cavide da muxli movisinje. wamowolils fexi naklebad mtkioda. damSvideba Tu movaxerxe da goneba movikribe, muxli swrafad damicxreba da tkivili momeSveba. sxva Tu araferi, erTi ram mainc SemiZlia: sadme cariel forToxlis yuTs viSovi, sadguris win Camovjdebi, gitaras davukrav da `litania lauretanas~ vimRereb. quds an keps, TiTqosda SemTxveviT, gverdiT davdeb safexurze da Tu vinmes azrad mouva qudSi fulis Cagdeba, maSin sxvebic gaTamamdebian da mas mihbaZaven. fuli Tundac imitom mWirdeboda, rom sigareti gamomelia. yvelaze ukeTesi iqneba, qudSi erTi aTpfenigiani da ori xuTpfenigiani Cavagdo. mets Tu ara, amden fuls mainc iSovis leo. Cems Tavs ukve vxedavdi sadguris kibeze Camomjdars, vxedavdi fer-umariliT dafarul Cems TeTr saxes sadguris Savi fasadis fonze _ macvia lurji triko, Savi tvidis pijaki, mwvane velvetis Sarvali da quCis xmauri rom davfaro, xmamaRla viwyeb: `Rosa mystica _ ora pro nobis, turris Davidica _ ora pro nobis, virgo fidelis _ ora pro nobis~1. sadgurTan im saaTebSi
Rosa mystica _ ora pro nobis, turris Davidica _ ora pro nobis, virgo fidelis _ ora pro nobis (laT.) _ vardo idumalo, iloce CvenTvis, daviTis simagrev, iloce CvenTvis, erTgulo qalwulo, iloce CvenTvis _ mimarTva qalwul mariamisadmi.
1

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Camovjdebi, roca romidan matareblebi Camodis da ase gagrZeldeba manamde, sanam ar Camova Cemi coniux infidelis1 Tavis kaTolike qmarTan erTad. maT jvrisweras, albaT, usiamo sazrunavic axlda Tan: mari arc qvrivi iyo, arc qmarTan gayrili da (rac SemTxveviT zustad vici) arc qalwuli. zomervildi, albaT, Tmas iglejda, patarZali saqorwilo leCaqis gareSe am saqmis mTel esTetikur mxares aufasurebso, magram, SeiZleba, maT sagangebo liturgiuli miTiTebebic ki aqvT znedacemuli qaliSvilebisa da klounebis yofili xasebisaTvis? netav, ra ifiqra im episkoposma, maT rom jvari daswera? episkoposze dabla mdgom saeklesio pirs isini, ra Tqma unda, ar ikadrebdnen. erTxel marim episkoposis rezidenciaSi SemaTria. Cemze didi STabeWdileba moaxdina mTelma iq atexilma fusfusma _ mitris daxurvam da moxdam, TeTri bafTis Semoxvevam da Semoxsnam, kverTxis aqeT-iqiT gadatanam da TeTri bafTis wiTliT Secvlam... me xom xelovanis mgrZnobiare suli maqvs da ganmeorebis esTetikuri fasi vici. isev daviwye fiqri Cems pantomimaze `gasaRebebi~. SemeZlo plastilini meSova, gasaRebebis anabeWdebi ameRo, an yalibebSi wyali Camesxa da macivarSi ramdenime gasaRebi `gamomecxo~. albaT, portatuli macivris Sovnasac SevZleb da yovel saRamos, scenaze gasvlis win, imden gasaRebs gamovacxob, ramdenic warmodgenis msvlelobaSi dadneba. SeiZleba am Canafiqridan marTlac gamosuliyo raRac, magram es varaudi imav wuTSi uarvyavi, radgan uaRresad rTuli momeCvena. garda amisa, ar mindoda damokidebuli vyofiliyavi metismetad bevr rekvizitze da teqnikur faTerakebze: xom SeiZleboda aRmoCeniliyo iseTi scenis muSa, romelic erTxel omSi romelime rainispirelma moatyua da xom SeeZlo im muSas macivris kari gaeRo da CemTvis warmodgena CaeSala? pirveli azri ufro momwonda. Camovjdebi bonis sadguris kibeze iseTi, rogoric var, oRond saxeze umarilwasmuli, da gitaris akompanementze `litania lauretanas~ vimRereb. gverdiT davideb quds, im dros rom
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coniux fidelis (laT.) _ moRalate meuRlev.

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mexura, roca Caplins vbaZavdi. axla mxolod misatyuebeli monetebi maklda: ukidures SemTxvevaSi aTpfenigianic ikmarebda, umjobesi iqneboda aT da xuTpfenigiani, xolo yvelafers ajobebda, qudSi rom sami moneta eyaros _ aTpfenigiani, xuTpfenigiani da orpfenigiani. maSin gamvlelebs ecodinebodaT, rom me religiuri fanatikosi ki ara var, romelic arafrad agdebs mcire mowyalebas, aramed is kaci, romlisTvisac yovelgvari mowyaleba, Savi fulic ki sasurvelia. Semdeg davumateb vercxlis fuls. dae, gamvlelebma dainaxon, did mowyalebas ki ar vufrTxi, viReb kidec. qudSi sigaretsac Cavdeb. adamianebis umravlesobas safulis gaxsnas sigaretis kolofis gaxsna urCevnia. erT mSvenier dRes ki, albaT, an wesrigis damcveli gamomecxadeba da quCaSi simReris nebarTvas momTxovs, anda RvTismgmoblobis winaaRmdeg mebrZoli centraluri komitetis romelime wevri da Cems simReras mkrexelobad miiCnevs. im SemTxvevisTvis, Tu mowmobas momTxoven, gverdiT yovelTvis meqneba qvanaxSiris briketi warweriT: `Sniri gagaTbobT~. am warweras yvela bavSvi icnobs, me ki wiTeli carciT xazs gavusvam Savi asoebiT daweril `Snirs~. SeiZleba win Cemi iniciali `h~ mivuwero. es iqneba arapraqtikuli, magram araorazrovani savizito baraTi: neba momeciT gagecnoT _ Sniri gaxlavarT. mamaCems marTla SeuZlia erT rameSi damexmaros _ da es araferi ar daujdeba _ quCis momRerlis nebarTva miSovos. amisaTvis sakmarisia, oberburgomistrs daurekos anda piradad moelaparakos klubSi, skatis TamaSis dros. mama movalea am saqmeSi damexmaros. maSin Tavisuflad Camovjdebi sadguris kibeze da davucdi romidan matareblis Camosvlas. Tu maris eyofa imis Zala, kibeze Caiaros da ar gadamexvios, Tavis mokvlis meti araferi damrCenia. amaze _ mere. TviTmkvlelobaze fiqrs mxolod erTi mizezis gamo ver vbedav. SeiZleba sxvebs es qedmaRlobad moeCvenoT, piradad me ki minda, Tavi marisaTvis Sevinaxo. xom SeiZleba ciupfners gaeyaros? maSin Cven bezeviciviT idealur mdgomareobaSi aRmovCndebiT _ maris SeeZleba samudamod darCes Cemi sayvareli, radgan, ka230

Tolikuri eklesiis kanonebis Tanaxmad, veRarasodes gaeyreba ciupfners. am SemTxvevaSi isRa damWirdeba, televiziis yuradReba miviqcio, kvlav movixveWo saxeli da Cvens erTad cxovrebaze eklesia Tvals daxuWavs. araviTari survili ara maqvs, marisTan eklesiaSi daviwero jvari da aRarc maT dasWirdebaT mesrolon TavianTi gacveTili qvemexi _ henrix merve. Tavs ukeT vgrZnobdi, muxli damicxra, TiTqmis aRar mtkioda. mawuxebda mxolod Tavis tkivili da melanqolia, magram maT ise SeveCvie, rogorc sikvdilze fiqrs. namdvil xelovans sikvdili yovelTvis gverdiT udgas da iseve ar iSorebs mas, rogorc kargi mRvdeli _ locvans. zustad vici, ra moxdeba Cemi sikvdilis Semdeg: Snirebis saojaxo akldamas ver avcdebi, dedaCemi atirdeba da imis mtkicebas daiwyebs, rom erTaderTi adamiania, visac Cemi esmoda. Cemi sikvdilis Semdeg yvelas mouyveba, `rogori iyo Cveni hansi sinamdvileSi~. dRemde ase fiqrobs da, albaT, darwmunebuli iqneba ukuniTi ukunisamde, rom me `vnebiani~ da `xarbi~ kaci var. _ diax, _ ityvis igi, _ Cveni hansi niWieri iyo, magram, samwuxarod, Zlier vnebiani da xarbi. samwuxarod, sruliad udisciplinoc... Tumca niWieri, uaRresad niWieri. zomervildi ityvis: _ didebuli kaci iyo Cveni keTili Sniri... samwuxarod, klerikalebisadmi zizRi sisxlSi hqonda gamjdari da metafizikisadmi gulgrilobas iCenda. bloTerts sananebeli is eqneba, rom droze ver miaRebina kanoni sikvdiliT dasjis Sesaxeb da sajarod ar damsajes sikvdiliT. fredeboilisaTvis viqnebi is `ganumeorebeli tipi~, romelsac `araviTari sociologiuri Tanamimdevroba ar gaaCnda~. kinkeli gulwrfelad, cxare cremliT atirdeba. mas marTla daecema Tavzari, magram vai rom, metismetad gvian. monika zilvsi ise aqviTindeba, TiTqos dameqvrivebinos, da inanebs, im saRamos maSinve CemTan rom ar gamoiqca da omleti ar gamikeTa.
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mari, ubralod, ar daijerebs, rom movkvdi. igi ciupfners miatovebs. sastumrodan sastumroSi ivlis da yvelgan me mikiTxavs, magram amaod. mamaCemi bolomde datkbeba Tavisi tragikuli gancdiT da didad inanebs, im saRamos ramdenime qaRaldis fuli rom ar dado malulad sakidis zemo Taroze. karli da sabine ise TavSeukaveblad itireben, rom samgloviaro procesiis yvela monawiles araesTetikuradac ki moeCveneba. sabine malulad karlis paltos jibeSi Cayofs xels, radgan Tavisi cxvirsaxoci amjeradac Sin darCeba. edgari Tavs movaled CaTvlis, cremli aravis daanaxvos. magram dakrZalvis mere SeiZleba kidev erTxel gaiaros Cvens parkSi is asmetriani manZili, Semdeg isev sasaflaoze dabrundes da henrieTes memorialur dafasTan vardebis didi Taiguli dados. Cem garda, arc erTma sulierma ar icis, edgars rom henrieTe uyvarda, arc is icis vinmem, rom im werilebis dastaze, cecxlSi rom davwvi, ori aso ewera, werilebis gamomgzavnis inicialebi: e. v. me kidev erT saidumloebas Cavitandi saflavSi: erTxel Seveswari, rogor Cavida deda sardafSi, sakuWnaoSi Seipara, Camokidebul lors didi naWeri CamoaWra da iqve, zezeurad, udanaCanglod, xarbad SeWama. CemSi aman zizRis nacvlad gancvifreba gamoiwvia da me gulaCuyebuli ufro viyavi, vidre SeZrwunebuli. Cven sardafSi Casvlas gvikrZalavdnen, magram me mindoda iq, sadac Cemodnebi elaga, CogburTis Zveli burTebi momenaxa. roca fexis xma gavigone, sinaTle Cavaqre. sakuTari TvaliT davinaxe, rogor aiRo Tarodan vaSlismurabiani qila, Semdeg isev adgilze dado da swored im dros Sevatyve idayvebze, rom raRacas Wrida. Semdeg loris daxveuli naWeri pirSi Caitena. es ambavi aravisTvis momiyolia da arc aravis movuyvebi. Cemi saidumlo Snirebis akldamis marmarilos filis qveS daimarxeba. ucnauria, magram miyvars im jiSis suldgmulebi, me rom vekuTvni _ miyvars adamianebi. roca Cemi jiSis suldgmuli kvdeba, mwuxareba mipyrobs. dedaCemis saflavzec vitirebdi. moxuci derkumis dasaflave232

bis dros Tavi ver Sevikave _ vayridi da vayridi kubos SiSvel ficrebs niCbiT miwas da gavigone, rogor CurCulebda viRac Cem ukan: `ase ar iqcevian~. magram me mainc manamde vayridi miwas, sanam marim niCabi ar gamomtaca xelidan. arafris danaxva ar mindoda _ aRarc misi saxlis, aRarc misi duqnis, arafris, rac mas momagonebda. mari ufro gonivrulad moiqca, duqani gayida da fuli `Cveni SvilebisaTvis~ gadainaxa. roca winkarSi gitaris gamosatanad gavedi, aRar vkoWlobdi. gitara SaliTidan amoviRe, saerTo oTaxSi ori savarZeli erTmaneTis pirispir davdgi, telefoni Cemken gadmovitane, savarZelSi Cavweqi da gitara avawyve. guls pirvelive bgerebi esalbuna, xolo roca simRera daviwye, Tavs TiTqmis kargad vgrZnobdi: Mater amabilis, Mater admirabilis1; sityvebs opa pro nobis gitaris akordebi Sevuwyve da momewona, mSvenivrad gamomdioda. ai, ase, axla rogoric var, iseTi davelodebi romidan Camosul matarebels _ gitariT xelSi da gverdze dadebuli qudiT. Mater boni consilii2. roca edgar vinekenisagan fuliani davbrundi, marim xom miTxra: aRarasodes, aRarasodes davSordebiT erTmaneTs, `sanam sikvdili ar gagvyris~. me jer kidev ar viyavi mkvdari. frau vinekeni yovelTvis ambobda: `vinc mReris, is jer kidev cocxalia~ da `visac saWmeli egemrieleba, jer kidev ar daRupula~. me ki kidec vmRerodi da kidec mSioda. verafriT warmomedgina, rom mari mudmivad sadme icxovrebda. Cven mudam erTad davxetialebdiT qalaqidan qalaqSi, sastumrodan sastumroSi da, Tu sadme ramdenime dRe SevyovndebodiT, meubneboda: _ Ria Cemodnebi xaxadafCenilni momCerebian da sazrdos mTxoven. da Cvenc maSinve amovutenidiT dafCenil xaxebs Cemodnebs, xolo, roca me ramdenime kviriT mixdeboda sadme darCena, mari ise daborialebda quCebSi, rogorc naqalaqevSi. kinoebi, eklesiebi, bulvaruli gazeTebi, riC-raCi... nuTu maris marTla
mater amabilis _ mater admirabilis (laT.) _ Rirso dedao, saocaro dedao. 2 mater boni consilii (laT.) _ dedav, keTilo mrCevelo.
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surs, monawileoba miiRos did sazeimo ceremonialSi, roca ciupfners maltis raindTa ordenis wevrad akurTxeben! nuTu marTla mohgvris siamovnebas kanclerebisa da koncernebis prezidentebis gverdiT jdoma, xolo Semdeg saxlSi ordenis wevris anaforaze cxeli uToTi cvilis laqebis amoyvana. marTalia, es gemovnebis sakiTxia, mari, magram Sen rom aseTi gemovneba ar gaqvs! ukeTesia miendo urwmuno klouns, romelic adre gagaRviZebs, raTa eklesiaSi ar dagagviandes da, Tu saWiro iqneba, eklesiaSi gasamgzavreblad taqsisac dagiqiravebs. arc Cemi lurji trikos garecxva dagWirdeba arasodes. 24 telefonma dareka da ramdenime wams gons ver movedi. mTeli yuradReba iqiTken mqonda mipyrobili, binis zaris darekva ar gamomrCenoda da leosaTvis droze gameRo kari. gitara gverdze gadavde, mowkriale telefons davaCerdi, Semdeg yurmili aviRe da vTqvi: _ alo. _ hans, Sena xar? _ mkiTxa leom. _ me var, ra kargia, rom moxval. leo gaCumda da Caaxvela. Tavidan misi xma ver vicani. _ SenTvis fuli maqvs gadmosacemi, _ miTxra man. sityva fuli ucnaurad JRerda. saerTod, leos ucnauri warmodgena hqonda fulze. piradad mas TiTqmis araviTari moTxovnileba ar hqonda _ Tambaqos ar eweoda, Rvinos ar svamda, saRamos gazeTebs ar kiTxulobda da kinoSi mxolod maSin dadioda, roca suraTs, savsebiT rom endoboda, iseTi sul cota xuTi kaci mainc naxavda da am suraTis naxvas masac urCevda. aseTi ram or-sam weliwadSi erTxel xdeboda. tramvaiT mgzavrobas fexiT siaruli erCia da, roca man sityva fuli warmoTqva, isev cud xasiaTze davdeqi. rom eTqva, cotaodeni fuli maqvso, mecodineboda, es iqneboda ori an sami marka. rogorc iqna, SiSs vZlie da xmaCaxleCilma vkiTxe: _ ramdeni? _ o, _ mipasuxa man, _ eqvsi marka da samocdaaTi pfenigi.
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misTvis es didi Tanxa iyo. Cemi azriT, imisTvis, rasac piradi moTxovnilebebi ewodeba, leos es Tanxa or weliwads eyofoda; zogjer baqanze gasasvlel bileTs da erT park pitnis kanfets iyidis, aTi pfenigic maTxovrisaTvis. asanTi ra aris, asanTic ki ar sWirdeba. xolo Tu erT kolofs imisTvis iyidda, rom `ufrosebisaTvis~ saxeldaxelod cecxli moekidebina, is erTi kolofi mTel weliwads eyofoda da, ramdenic unda etarebina jibiT, mainc axaliviT iqneboda. marTalia, drodadro sadalaqoSi Sesvla sWirdeboda, magram Tmis gasakreW fuls igi, albaT, mamaCvenis mier swavlisaTvis dawesebuli `mimdinare angariSidan~ iRebda. adre xandaxan koncertis bileTis SesaZenad xarjavda fuls, Tumca metwilad dedaCemi xelSi kontramarkebs aCeCebda. mdidrebi xom Raribebze bevrad met saCuqars iReben yovelTvis da yidviTac ufro iafad yiduloben yvelafers. dedaCems biTumad movaWreTa mTeli sia hqonda Sedgenili. Cemi varaudiT, igi safosto markebsac ki ufro iafad yidulobda. eqvsi marka da samocdaaTi pfenigi leosaTvis didi Tanxa iyo, Tumca amjerad _ CemTvisac. magram leom, etyoba, jer ar icoda, rom me, rogorc amas Cvens saxlSi ambobdnen, `amJamad arsebobis yvela wyaro momspari mqonda~. _ kargi, leo, _ vuTxari me, _ didi madlobeli var, roca aqeT wamoxval, erTi kolofi sigareti wamomiRe. leos pasuxi ar gaucia, me kvlav gavigone misi Caxveleba da vkiTxe: _ gesmis Cemi Tu ara? iqneb, is ewyina, rom im fulidan maSinve sigaretis yidva vTxove. _ mesmis, mesmis, _ miTxra man enis borZikiT, _ mimZims amis Tqma, magram mosvla ar SemiZlia. _ raa? _ viyvire me, _ ar SegiZlia? _ axla cxras TxuTmeti wuTi uklia, me ki cxraze saswavlebelSi unda viyo. _ gvian rom dabrunde, ras gizamen, eklesiidan mogkveTen? _ vkiTxe me. _ kargi erTi, _ miTxra nawyenma.
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_ gana ar SeiZleba, mcire xniT daeTxovo an raime aseTi moaxerxo? _ am dros ara, es dRisiT unda gamekeTebina. _ vTqvaT da daigviane? _ mkacr gafrTxilebas miviReb, _ miTxra Cumad. _ Tu laTinuri jer kidev maxsovs, amas raRac kavSiri unda hqondes baRTan. leom Caicina. _ ufro sworad, baRis makratelTan, _ miTxra man. _ sakmaod usiamo ramea. _ kargi, _ vuTxari me, _ ar minda Cem gamo usiamo dakiTxva mogiwyon, leo, magram CemTvis aucilebelia Tundac erTi cocxali adamiani myavdes gverdiT. _ rTuli saqmea, _ miTxra man, _ unda gamigo. mkacr gafrTxilebas ar moveridebodi, magram am kviraSi rom kidev erTi mkacri gafrTxileba miviRo, amas Cems pirad saqmeSi Seitanen da iZulebuli viqnebi, skrutiniumis1 winaSe warvdge axsnaganmartebiT. _ vis winaSe? _ vkiTxe me, _ gaimeore, Cemo kargo, es sityva nela. leom amoioxra, raRac CaibuzRuna da Zalian nela miTxra: _ skrutiniumi. _ daswyevlos eSmakma, leo _ vuTxari me, _ es Wriala sityva ise JRers, TiTqos mwerebs nawil-nawil kuwaven. xolo, roca Seni `piradi saqme~ axsene, anas `mecxre polki~ gamaxsenda. maTTanac yvelaferi ise SehqondaT pirad saqmeSi, TiTqos nasamarTlobis mqoneni yofiliyvnen. _ RmerTo Cemo, hans, _ miTxra man, _ nuTu es ramdenime wuTi aRzrdis sistemaze kamaTs unda movaxmaroT? _ Tu ar gsiamovnebs, ki batono, nu vikamaTebT, magram xom arsebobs sxva gzebic, mxedvelobaSi maqvs araswori gzebi, magaliTad, kedelze gadaZroma da sxva amdagvari, rogorc es meskrutiniumi (laT.) _ sasuliero samsaxuris kandidatTa niWisa da unaris Semowmeba, romelic faruli kenWisyriT mTavrdeba.
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cxre qveiT polkSi xdeboda. Cemi azriT, yvela mkacr sistemaSi SeiZleba gasaZromi xvrelis aRmoCena. _ SeiZleba, CvenTanac SeiZleba, _ miTxra man, _ iseve, rogorc samxedro samsaxurSi, magram me mezizReba amgvari gzebi, swori gziT minda viaro. _ nuTu ar SegiZlia, Cemi gulisaTvis zizRi dasZlio da erTxel mainc gadmoZvre kedelze. man amoioxra da me warmovidgine, rogor gaaqnia Tavi. _ nuTu xvalamde dacda ar SegiZlia? xval leqcias gavacden da cxra saaTze SenTan viqnebi. axlave xom ar miemgzavrebi bonidan? _ ara, _ vupasuxe me, _ bonSi karga xans davrCebi. hainrih belenis misamarTi mainc momeci, davurekav. iqneb, Camovides kiolnidan an iqidan, sadac axla imyofeba. saqme is aris, rom muxli vitkine, jibecarieli var, aravisTan aRar maqvs dadebuli kontraqti da aRarc mari myavs. ra Tqma unda, xvalamde arc muxli momirCeba, arc fuli gamiCndeba, arc kontraqts damidebs vinme da arc mari damibrundeba. magram, iqneb, am xnis ganmavlobaSi hainrihi mRvdlad ekurTxa da motoroleri an rame amdagvari SeiZina. mismen? _ diax, _ miTxra man uxalisod. _ gTxov, momce misi misamarTi da telefonis nomeri. leo dumda da mis oxvras bolo ar uCanda. SeiZleba kacs efiqra, asi weli saaRsareboSi ijda da axla oxravda im codvebisa da sisuleleebis gamo, rac kacobriobam Caidina. _ kargi, getyvi, _ miTxra man bolos da Sevatyve, rom Tavs Zalas atanda. _ etyoba, Sen erTi ram ar ici. _ ra ar vici, _ viyvire me, _ RmerTo Cemo, garkveviT miTxari, leo! _ hainrihi sasuliero piri aRar aris, _ miTxra man Cumad. _ me ki megona, sasuliero pirad manamde rCebian, sanam pirSi suli udgaT. _ es asecaa, _ miTxra man, _ me imis Tqma minda, rom hainrihma sasuliero samsaxurs Tavi daaneba da ager ukve ramdenime Tvea, ukvalod gaqra. _ leom es sityvebi Zlivs amoRerRa. _ eg araferi, _ vuTxari me, _ hainrihi isev gamoCndeba.
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uecrad erTma azrma gamielva TavSi da vkiTxe: _ marto gaiqca? _ ara, viRac qaliSvilTan erTad, _ mipasuxa leom mkacrad da es sityvebi ise JRerda, TiTqos meubneboda: `hainrihs Savi Wiri Seeyara~. qaliSvili Semecoda. igi, ra Tqma unda, kaTolikea da, albaT, Zalian uWirs gakreWil, qoxSi TavSefarebul mRvdelTan cxovreba da `xorciel JinTan~ dakavSirebuli detalebis atana _ aqa-iq mimoyrili TeTreuli, qveda sacvlebi, sabeWurebi, sigaretis namwvavebiT savse lambaqi, kinos kontrolmoxeuli bileTebi da Segneba imisa, Tu ra male ileva fuli. xolo roca qaliSvili puris, sigaretis an Rvinis sayidlad kibeze Cadis da buzRuna diasaxlisi farTod aRebs Tavisi oTaxis kars, mas isic ki ar SeuZlia, diasaxliss Ria karSi SesZaxos: `Cemi qmari xelovania, diax, xelovani!~ orive Semecoda, magram qaliSvili ufro metad. roca hainrihisTana kapelandi aseT mdgomareobaSi aRmoCndeba, ara marto ubadruki xdeba, aramed Tavgzac ereva da aseTebis mimarT saeklesio xelisufalnic met simkacres iCenen. amgvari ram rom zomervilds daemarTos, albaT, Tvals daxuWaven, magram zomervilds arc eyoleba yviTelkanWebiani ekonomi qali. misi ekonomi qali, romelsac madalenas eZaxis, lamazi, ferxorciT savse, kargad movlili mxiaruli dedakacia da, amasTanave, SesaniSnavi mzareulic. _ ras izam, _ vuTxari leos, _ amgvarad, droebiT igi CemTvis gamousadegaria. _ RmerTo Cemo, _ miTxra leom, _ ra gulcivad miiRe es ambavi. _ me arc hainrihis eparqiis episkoposi var da arc am saqmiT seriozulad dainteresebuli piri, _ vupasuxe me, _ mawuxebs mxolod detalebi. edgaris misamarTi an telefonis nomeri mainc Tu ici? _ vinekenze mekiTxebi? _ diax, _ vupasuxe me, _ xom gaxsovs edgari? kiolnSi CvenTan SexvedrixarT erTmaneTs, xolo bavSvobaSi yovelTvis vinekenebTan vTamaSobdiT da kartofilis salaTas vWamdiT.
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_ rogor ara, maxsovs, _ mipasuxa man, _ kargad maxsovs, magram ramdenadac vici, vinekeni ar unda iyos germaniaSi. viRacam miambo, romeliRac komisias samecniero mivlinebaSi gahyva indoeTSi Tu tailandSio, zustad ar vici. _ darwmunebuli xar? _ vkiTxe me. _ TiTqmis, _ mipasuxa man, _ ho, gamaxsenda, heriberTma miTxra. _ vin, vin giTxra? _ viyvire me. leom ise Caiwyvita xma, rom misi oxvrac ki ar mesmoda. axla ki mivxvdi, ratom ar undoda CemTan mosvla. _ vin giTxra? _ vkiTxe kidev erTxel, magram leos pasuxi ar gaucia. saaRsarebo Caxveleba ukve Cvevad qceoda. aseTi Caxveleba xSirad gamigonia, roca eklesiaSi maris velodebodi. _ ukeTesi iqneba, _ vuTxari Cumad, _ xvalac rom ar moxvide, ar Rirs leqciis gacdena. barem isic Tqvi, rom mari naxe. _ etyoba, am xnis ganmavlobaSi oxvrisa da Caxvelebis meti araferi aswavles. dadumebulma kidev erTxel amoioxra Rrmad, xangrZlivad da sawyaloblad. _ pasuxisaTvis Tavs nu Seiwuxeb, _ vuTxari me, _ mxolod momikiTxe is sasiamovno kaci, dRes rom orjer velaparake telefoniT. _ STriuderi? _ mkiTxa man Cumad. _ ar vici, ra gvaria, magram misi xma sasiamovnod JRers telefonSi. _ saTvalavSi aravin agdebs, _ miTxra man, _ mas... mas xom samadlod aWmeven purs, _ leom raRac sicilis magvari dastyua sakuTar Tavs. _ zogjer telefonTan miipareba da sisuleleebs roSavs. fexze wamovdeqi da odnav gadaweuli fardidan moedanze dakidebul saaTs Sevxede. cxras sami wuTi aklda. _ axla jobia movrCeT, _ vuTxari me, _ Torem pirad saqmeSi rames Cagiweren. nu gaacden xval leqcias. _ gamige, rogorme gamige, _ Semevedra igi. _ daswyevlos eSmakma, _ vuTxari me, _ mesmis, mesmis Seni, Tanac Zalian kargad.
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_ bolos da bolos, ra kaci xar Sen? _ miyvira man. _ klouni var da wamebs vagroveb. kargad iyavi, _ vupasuxe me da yurmili davde. 25 damaviwyda mekiTxa, rogor moewona jarSi samsaxuri, magram imedi mqonda, amis saSualeba odesme kidev momecemoda. darwmunebuli var, saWmel-sasmels qebiT moixseniebda _ saxlSi ase kargad arasodes kvebavdnen. yovelgvar gaWirvebas `aRmzrdelobiTi TvalsazrisiT uaRresad sasargeblo gamocdilebad~ CaTvlida, xolo xalxidan gamosul adamianebTan urTierTobas `friad Wkuis saswavleblad~. Tumca, SeiZleba araferic ar vkiTxo. konviqtis sawolSi igi Rames TeTrad gaaTenebs, sindisis qenjniT Sewuxebuli, Tavs gaiwvalebs SekiTxviT, sworad moiqca Tu ara, CemTan rom ar movida. me ki misTvis imdeni ram mqonda saTqmeli: leosaTvis ukeTesi iqneboda Teologia samxreT amerikaSi, moskovSi an msoflios nebismier mxareSi eswavla da ara bonSi. bolos da bolos, xom unda Seignos, rom bonSi ar arsebobs is, rasac igi WeSmarit rwmenas eZaxis. aq zomervildsa da bloTerts Soris gaCxirulia rjulSecvlili Sniri, igi pastoric ki gaxda da lamis saimisodac vargoda, birJis kursi ganemtkicebina. saWiro iyo am sakiTxze leos movlaparakebodi da uTuod Cvens saxlSi, dedaCemis Jurfiqsze. ojaxis moRalate orive Svili samzareuloSi davsxdebodiT anasTan, yavas davlevdiT, Zvel ambebs movigonebdiT, im diad dros, roca parkSi tanksawinaaRmdego xelyumbarebis tyorcnaSi vvarjiSobdiT. erT dRes ki Cvens WiSkarTan vermaxtis manqanebi gaCerdnen da saxlSi samxedroebi Cagviyenes mdgmurebad. manqanebidan gadmovidnen oficeri _ mgoni maiori iyo, feldfebeli da jariskacebi. erTi manqaniT moitanes droSa. arc oficers da arc jariskacebs araferi ainteresebdaT, garda erbokvercxisa, koniakisa, masxrobisa da samzareuloSi moaxleebTan Rlabucisa. xandaxan ki oficialurni xdebodnen, ufro sworad, ibRinZebodnen. Cveni
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saxlis win Camwkrivdebodnen. oficeri gaijgimeboda, xels kitelis qveS im iaffasiani moxetiale msaxiobiviT amoidebda, polkovnikis rols rom TamaSobs, da raRacas gahyviroda `saboloo gamarjvebaze~. mTeli es sanaxaoba yalbi, sasacilo da uazro iyo. erTxel ki, roca gamoaSkaravda, rom frau vinekenma, or sxva qalTan erTad, malulad gaiara tyetye germanelebisa da amerikelebis frontis xazi mxolod imisaTvis, frontis xazs iqiT mcxovrebi ZmisaTvis _ puris sacxobis patroni rom iyo _ puri gamoerTmia, maTi gabRenZiloba sicocxlisaTvis saxifaTo gaxda. oficers undoda frau vinekeni da is ori qali SpionaJisa da sabotaJisaTvis daexvrita (dakiTxvaze frau vinekenma aRiara, rom frontis xazs iqiT erT amerikel jariskacs elaparaka), magram mamaCemma _ Tu mexsiereba ar mRalatobs, es ukve meored cxovrebaSi _ vaJkacoba gamoiCina, qalebi improvizebuli cixidan, patara sauToebeli oTaxidan, gamoiyvana da qvemoT, mdinaris piras, navebis fardulSi damala. maSin man gamoiCina namdvili simamace, uyvira oficers, oficermac uyvira. yvelaze sasacilo is iyo, rom aRSfoTebisagan oficers mkerdze ordenebi uTamaSebda, dedaCemi ki am dros nazi xmiT mamaCemsac amSvidebda da oficersac: _ batonebo, batonebo, yvelafers aqvs zRvari. am ambavSi dedaCems yvelaze metad is eCoTireboda, rom ori `batoni~ uyviroda erTmaneTs. _ sanam am qalebze xels aRmarTavdeT, me unda damxvritoT... gTxovT... _ ganacxada mamaCemma, pijakis Rilebi marTlac Seixsna da oficers mkerdi miuSvira. magram am dros jariskacebi iqaurobas gaecalnen, radgan rainis gorakebze amerikelebi gamoCndnen da qalebs ukve Tavisuflad SeeZloT navebis fardulidan gamosuliyvnen. yvelaze arasasiamovno, rac am oficers, mgoni maiors, hqonda, misi ordenebi iyo. SeiZleba uordenebod rogorme SeenarCunebina cotaodeni Rirseba. roca dedaCemis Jurfiqsze aqa-iq dayudebul, ordenebiT mkerddamSvenebul, ubadruk filisterebs vxedav, yovelTvis is oficeri magondeba da maSin zomervildis ordenic ki, Pro
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Ecclesia1 Tu raRac amdagvari, asatani meCveneba. zomervildi Tavisi eklesiisaTvis mainc akeTebs saSviliSvilo saqmes. yvela Tavisi `msaxiobi~ xelSi uWiravs da imdeni gemovneba aqvs, rom gulze dabneuli ordeni eCoTiros. ordens igi mxolod saeklesio procesebisa da televiziiT gamosvlis dros ibnevs gulze. Cemi azriT, televizia masac arTmevs sindisis im natamals, jer kidev rom SerCenia. Tu Cveni saukune gansakuTrebul saxelwodebas imsaxurebs, mas prostituciis saukune unda ewodos. xalxi ukve eCveva meZavTa leqsikas. erTxel zomervilds telediskusiis (SeiZleba Tu ara Tanamedrove xelovneba religiuri iyos?) Semdeg Sevxvdi da man mkiTxa: _ rogor mogewoneT, vvargodi? zustad ase ekiTxebian meZavebi TavianT klientebs gastumrebisas. isRa aklda eTqva: _ sxvebTanac gamiwieT rekomendacia. maSin me vuTxari: _ Tqven me saerTod ar momwonxarT da, cxadia, arc guSin momewonebodiT. marTalia, Cemi azri uaRresad frTxilad gamovTqvi, magram zomervilds mainc gulze moxvda. is sazizRari iyo. Tavisi ganaTleba da enamWevroba rom sxvebisTvis daenaxvebina, man `mokla~, `yeli gamosWra~ an, rbilad rom vTqvaT, `gaTela~ mowinaaRmdege, erTi umweo socialisti, roca mzakvrulad hkiTxa: _ maSasadame, adreuli pikaso Tqven abstraqcionistad migaCniaT? Semdeg ki aTi milioni mayureblis winaSe TmagaWaRaravebuli kaci, romelmac raRac CailuRluRa valdebulebis Sesaxeb, aseTi kiTxviT mospo: _ ah, Tqven, ra Tqma unda, socialistur xelovnebas gulisxmobT... iqneb, socialistur realizmsac? meore diliT, quCaSi rom Sevxvdi da vuTxari, ar momewoneTmeTqi, kaci gaTavda. misi pativmoyvareoba didad Selaxa im am1

Pro Ecclesia (laT.) _ eklesiisaTvis.

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bavma, aT milion mayurebelSi erTs rom ar moewona. magram Cemi armowoneba askecad aunazRaura kaTolikur gazeTebSi atexilma `qebis koriantelma~. gazeTebi werdnen, gamarjveba `keTili saqmisaTvis~ moipovao. darCenili sami sigaretidan erTs movukide, xelSi gitara aviRe da simebs odnav Camovkari. gamaxsenda, ramdeni ram mindoda meambna leosaTvis, ramdeni ram mqonda sakiTxavi. yovelTvis, roca masTan seriozulad vapirebdi laparaks, leo gamosaSveb gamocdebs abarebda anda Tavisi skrutiniumisa eSinoda. vfiqrobdi agreTve imaze, marTla memRera `litania lauretana~ Tu ara; ra saWiro iyo; vinmes SeiZleba hgoneboda, rom kaTolike var. Semdeg isini `erT-erT Cvenganad~ gamomacxadebdnen da am ambavs TavianTi saqmis propagandisaTvis gamoiyenebdnen. isini xom yovelTvis yvelafers TavianT sasargeblod `iyeneben~. is, rom me kaTolike ar viyavi da `litania lauretana~ momwonda, xalxSi gaugebrobasa da dabneulobas gamoiwvevda. isic ki ar ecodinebodaT, rom me im ebrael gogonas TanavugrZnob, romelsac es litania miuZRvnes. kaTolikeebi raRacas mikib-mokibavdnen, CemSi ramdenime milion kaTolons aRmoaCendnen, Semdeg teleekranze gamomaWenebdnen da TavianTi aqciebis kurss kidev ufro maRla aswevdnen. saWiro iyo sxva simReris gamonaxva. samwuxarod, yvela simReras mainc `litania lauretana~ merCia. magram am simReris wamowyeba bonis sadguris kibeze gaugebrobas gamoiwvevs. mwyinda. simReras TiTqmis daveufle, xolo sityvebs Ora pro nobis gitaraze moxdenili akompanementi SevurCie. xalxis winaSe gamosasvlelad rom movmzadebuliyavi, fexze wamovdeqi. ra Tqma unda, rogorc ki Cemi agenti conereri gaigebsa, rom gitaris akompanementze quCaSi simRerebs vmReri, maSinve `zurgs Semaqcevs~. magram, litaniebi, Tantum Ergo da sxva saeklesio simRerebi rom vimRero, _ maT didi siamovnebiT vmRerodi wlebis ganmavlobaSi abazanaSi, _ SeiZleba `TamaSSi Caebas~, radgan es kargi ankesi iqneba, daaxloebiT iseTi, rogoric madonebis jRabnaa. sxvaTa Soris, darwmunebuli viyavi, rom conerers vuyvardi, _ miwis Svilebi ufro gulkeTilni
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arian, vidre zecis Svilebi, _ magram sakmarisi iyo, bonis sadguris kibeze Camovmjdariyavi, rom `biznesis~ TvalsazrisiT misTvis ukve gaTavebuli kaci viqnebodi. siarulis dros SesamCnevad aRar vkoWlobdi. amitom forToxlis yuTi aucilebeli aRar iyo. marcxena iRliaSi taxtis baliSs amoviCri, marjvenaSi gitaras da ase waval samuSaoze. kolofSi jer kidev ori sigareti ido. erTs movwev, meores ki Tan waviReb, Sav qudSi Cavagdeb da misatyueblad gamoviyeneb. kargi iqneboda, sigaretis gverdiT erTi moneta mainc damegdo. Sarvlis jibeebi movisinje, gadmovabrune kidec: jibeebSi kinoTeatris ramdenime Zveli bileTi, riC-raCis patara wiTeli figura da qaRaldis WuWyiani cxvirsaxoci aRmoCnda, fuli ki ara. amis Semdeg swrafad gamovwie sakidris qveda ujra. ujraSi iyo tansacmlis jagrisi, bonis saeklesio gazeTis gamoweris qviTari, erTi boTli ludis taloni, magram fuli arc am ujraSi Canda. samzareuloSi yvela ujra gadavaqoTe, Semdeg sawol oTaxSi gavvardi, sayeloebi, manJetebis sakinZeebi, windebi da cxvirsaxocebi gadavqeqe, xeli mwvane velvetis Sarvlis jibeebSic vafaTure. veraferi aRmovaCine. amis Semdeg muqi Sarvali gavixade, gamocvlili kaniviT iatakze davtove, iqve davagde TeTri perangic, momolisfro-mocisfro triko Cavicvi, karadis sarkiani kari gamovaRe da sakuTari Tavi SevaTvaliere. didebulia, aseTi kargi arasodes vyofilvar. ferumarili metismetad sqlad mqonda saxeze dadebuli _ im xnis ganmavlobaSi, rac uqmad ido, cximi gamoscloda da axla sarkeSi davinaxe, rom grimi alag-alag damskdariyo. saxe miwidan amoTxril qandakebas mimigavda. muqi Tma parikiviT medo Tavze. simReris teqsti, am dros rom momivida TavSi, CemTvis CaviRiRine: `sawyal papsa da ioanes qdp-s ar eyureba, arc miuleris viria, arc misi Zroxa sWirdeba~. dawyeba amiTac SeiZleba, RvTis gmobasTan mebrZoli centraluri komiteti simReris teqstSi ver gamomedaveba. amgvar strofs kidev bevrs SevTxzav da baladasaviT vimRereb. siamovnebiT vitirebdi, magram ferumarili ise kargad mqonda wasmuli saxeze, Camosarecxad ar memeteboda, momwonda bzarebic, aqerclili adgilebic, cremli
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ki yvelafers gaafuWebda. cremli Semdegac SemeZlo meRvara, Tavisufal dros, Tuki tirili isev momindeboda. profesionaluri habitusi saukeTeso safarvelia, mwuxareba samkvdrosasicocxlod mxolod wmindanebsa da diletantebs gmiravs. sakuTar Tavs rom ufro Rrmad Cavwvdomodi da, amave dros, davSorebodi, sarkes movcildi. Tu mari am mdgomareobaSi mixilavs da Semdeg mainc SeZlebs ciupfneris maltis raindis tansacmelze cvilis laqebis uToTi amoyvanas, maSin is CemTvis mkvdari iqneba da Cven gayrilebi viqnebiT. maSin isRa damrCeba, mis saflavze viglovo. imedia, yvela maTgans, vinc win Camivlis, jibeSi xurda fuli eqneba: leos aT pfenigze cota meti, tailandidan dabrunebul edgar vinekens SeiZleba Zveli oqros fulic ki aRmoaCndes, babuaCemi ki, roca iskiadan dabrundeba, Ceks mainc gamomiwers. amasobaSi Cekis ganaRdeba viswavle. deda or an xuT pfenigze mets ar gaimetebs, monika zilvsi, albaT, daixreba da makocebs, xolo zomervildi, kinkeli da fredeboili, aRSfoTebulni Cemi ugemovnobiT, sigaretsac ki ar Camigdeben qudSi. im saaTebSi, roca samxreTidan matarebeli ar Camodis, sabine emondsTan gavemgzavrebi velosipediT Cemi wili wvnianis Sesaxvrepad. SeiZleba zomervildma ciupfners romSi daurekos da urCios, matareblidan godesbergSi Camovides. Tu ase moxda, maSin maTi vilisaken gavemgzavrebi, ferdobze gaSenebuli baRis win Camovjdebi da Cems simRerebs vimRereb: mova mari, Sevxedav da mivxvdebi, mkvdaria Tu cocxali. erTaderTi adamiani, vinc mecodeboda, mamaCemi iyo. didebulad moiqca, roca qalebi daxvretas gadaarCina, maSinac kargad moiqca, roca mxarze xeli damado. Tumca saxeze fer-umarili medo, sarkeSi aSkarad Canda, rom mainc wavagavdi mamas, ki ar wavagavdi, saocrad vgavdi da mivxvdi imasac, ratom ver Seurigda verafriT leos gakaTolikebas. leo ar mecodeboda, mas rwmena asuldgmulebda. aTis naxevaric ar iyo, liftiT rom qveviT Cavedi. gamaxsenda qristiani vaJbatoni qosTerTi, romelsac Cemi erTi boTli arayi da pirvel da meore klass Soris samgzavro bileTis fasis sxvaoba emarTa. gadawyvetili mqonda, umarko werili gameg245

zavna misTvis da sindisze Semegdo. mas CemTvis bargis qviTaric unda gamoegzavna. gamixarda, Cemi karis mezobeli, lamazi frau grebseli rom ar Semxvda, Torem iZulebuli viqnebodi, misTvis yvelaferi amexsna. im SemTxvevaSi ki, Tu sadguris kibeze daminaxavda, arafris axsna ar damWirdeboda. maklda mxolod Cemi savizito baraTi _ qvanaxSiris briketi. gareT griloda, namdvili martis saRamo idga. pijakis sayelo aviwie, qudi davixure da xelis faTuriT jibeSi Cemi ukanaskneli sigareti movsinje. damaviwyda koniakis boTli, friad dekoratiul STabeWdilebas moaxdenda, magram mowyalebis gamRebT daafrTxobda, radgan Zvirfasi markisa iyo, rac sacobzec ki emCneoda. marcxena iRliaSi baliSamodebuli, marjvenaSi ki gitaraamodebuli, kvlav sadgurisaken daviZari. mxolod gzad mimavalma SevamCnie drois damaxasiaTebeli niSnebi, aq `takimasxruls~ rom uwodeben. nasvam Wabuks, fidel kastros rom damgvaneboda, undoda Cxubi aetexa CemTvis, magram gaveride. sadguris kibeze espanel matadorebad da senioritebad gadacmuli axalgazrdebi taqsis elodebodnen. sul gadamaviwyda, qalaqSi rom karnavali tardeboda. mec swored es mWirdeboda _ moyvarulTa brboSi yvelaze saimedod profesionali msaxiobia SeniRbuli. baliSi qvemodan mesame safexurze davde, davjeqi, qudi movixade, Sig sigareti Cavagde, arc mTlad SuaSi da arc mTlad kuTxeSi, aramed ise, qudSi Cagdebuls rom damsgavseboda, da simRera daviwye: `sawyal papsa ioanes~. yuradRebas aravin maqcevda, magram jerjerobiT arc iyo saWiro. gaivlida ori-sami saaTi da nel-nela yuradRebasac momaqcevdnen. roca sadguris diqtoris xma gaisma, simRera Sevwyvite. man gamoacxada, hamburgidan matarebeli Camovidao. isev ganvagrZe dakvra da uecrad SevkrTi _ qudSi pirveli moneta Cavarda. aTpfenigiani moneta sigarets moxvda da gverdze gaswia. sigareti gavaswore da simRera ganvagrZe.

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50 wigni, romelic unda waikiTxo, sanam cocxali xar

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wigni 30
redaqtori maia aludauri koreqtorebi: nana antonova-iluriZe manana dauSvili natalia CimakaZe kompiuteruli uzrunvelyofa daTo mosiaSvili ydis dizaini eTer gziriSvili proeqtis menejeri TinaTin asaTiani

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seriis wina wignebi


wigni 1 onore de balzaki Sagrenis tyavi

wigni 2 jek londoni martin ideni

wigni 3 SoTa rusTaveli vefxistyaosani

wigni 4 aleqsandre diuma sami muSketeri or tomad

wigni 5 uiliam Seqspiri hamleti

wigni 6 Jiul verni 80 000 kilometri wyalqveS

wigni 7 mixail bulgakovi ostati da margarita

wigni 8 oskar uaildi dorian greis portreti

wigni 9 Carlz dikensi devid koperfildi

wigni 10 erix maria remarki triumfaluri TaRi

wigni 11 frederik begbederi 99 franki

wigni 12 edgar po moTxrobebi

wigni 13 homerosi odisea

wigni 14 main ridi uTavo mxedari

wigni 15 Tomas mani budenbrokebi or tomad

wigni 16 mark tveni tom soieris Tavgadasavali

wigni 17 konstantine gamsaxurdia didostatis marjvena

wigni 18 migel de servantesi don kixoti or tomad

wigni 19 o henri moTxrobebi

wigni 20 Stefan cvaigi mariam stiuarti

wigni 21 mario piuzo naTlia

wigni 22 gustav floberi madam bovari

wigni 23 jorj orueli 1984

wigni 24 stendali wiTeli da Savi

wigni 25 fiodor dostoevski Zmebi karamazovebi or tomad

wigni 26 ernest heminguei mSvidobiT, iaraRo!

wigni 27 gi de mopasani lamazi megobari

wigni 28 riunoske akutagava moTxrobebi

wigni 29 uiliam Tekerei amaoebis bazari or tomad

seriis momdevno wignebi

dante aligieri RvTaebrivi komedia

Sarlota bronte jein eari

vaJa-fSavela poemebi

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