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    Sex, Celibacy, and Priesthood
    Sex, Celibacy, and Priesthood
    Sex, Celibacy, and Priesthood
    Ebook103 pages1 hour

    Sex, Celibacy, and Priesthood

    By Lou A. Bordisso

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    About this ebook

    The traditional Catholic Church views true celibacy as a gift from God. But todays reality paints a much different picture. In Sex, Celibacy, and Priesthood, Lou A. Bordisso reviews the research on sexual activity and celibacy among Catholic priests.

    Featuring heart-wrenching, anonymous, and candid self-disclosures about the sexual behaviors of heterosexual, gay, and bisexual priests, Bordisso explores the meaning of celibacy in accordance with Roman Catholic Church teachings, doctrine, and canon law. Sex, Celibacy, and Priesthood provides an honest and frank study of current perspectives on celibacy in light of priestly sexual behaviors. It allows for Roman Catholic priests to speak out in their own voices about their struggles and the conflicts they experience between celibacy and their sexual activities.

    At a time when most are disgusted with the sexual scandal coverups, smokescreens, and veil of secrecy provided by many Roman Catholic bishops and their apologists, Sex, Celibacy, and Priesthood tells the truth and encourages us to think imaginatively and compassionately about an issue of crucial importance to the Roman Catholic Church at this moment in history.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisheriUniverse
    Release dateAug 19, 2011
    ISBN9781462038428
    Sex, Celibacy, and Priesthood
    Author

    Lou A. Bordisso

    LOU A. BORDISSO was a bishop within the Old Catholic tradition. He provides psychotherapy, pastoral counseling, and spiritual care for ordained clergy and lay ministers. Bordisso has been a licensed marriage and family therapist for twenty-five years.

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      Book preview

      Sex, Celibacy, and Priesthood - Lou A. Bordisso

      Contents

      Introduction

      Chapter One: The Church and Celibacy

      Chapter Two:

      Written Responses from Priests

      Personal Priestly Reflections:

      Conflicts between Sexuality and Priesthood

      Personal Priestly Reflections: Understanding, Definition, and Praxis of Celibate Chastity

      Chapter Three:

      Alternative Models for Celibate Chastity

      Chapter Four:

      Pastoral and Theological Reflections

      Bibliography

      Endorsements

      Appendix

      Sex, Celibacy, and Priesthood is dedicated in loving memory to the late Father Larry Tozzeo, OFM. He was a source of inspiration to all who had the good fortune to know him.

      Larry was a person of prophetic vision and unyielding commitment to the exiled, alienated, and disenfranchised. He lived and proclaimed the true spirit of St. Francis.

      From the time of his HIV diagnosis until his death, Father Larry exhibited profound courage and hope.

      Father Larry was my spiritual director during my college years. I will never forget his departing words of wisdom,

      If you are worthy, take one. If you are unworthy, take two.

      Introduction

      In the last few decades, the definition, meaning, and practice of celibacy have come under scrutiny. The very definition and practice of celibacy of many Roman Catholic priests often exclude sexual abstinence and continence. One of the largest studies on celibacy and sexual behaviors among Roman Catholic priests to date was by Sipe (1989). His research was a twenty-five-year study of 1,500 self-identified heterosexual, homosexual, and bisexual Catholic clerics. Sipe’s research concluded that 50 percent or fewer Roman Catholic priests in the United States even attempt celibacy and only 2 percent actually achieve what he defined as total chastity and true celibate achievement.

      It seems as though not a day goes by without a news story about genital-sexual allegations, charges, and convictions against Roman Catholic priests and bishops. Some allegations are unfounded, and many are true. The stories of clergy sexual activity range from the sexual abuse of children by priests to bishops keeping female mistresses or male lovers.

      My interest in priestly sexual activity is partly a result of providing psychotherapy, pastoral, and, spiritual care among Catholic clergy who were struggling with their celibate state. The interest I had was not purely professional. On a personal level, several gay priests who were close friends disclosed to me that they were sexually active on a regular basis. I also studied heterosexual and homosexual priests for my doctoral dissertation. My dissertation topic researched the relationship of moral development and sexual orientation among Roman Catholic priests. One portion of my study requested that the research participants comment on how they resolved conflicts, if any, between their sexuality and their vocation as a priest. In the course of responding to this inquiry, many priests not only commented on their sexuality and sexual orientation but also on their genital-sexual activity in their personal history or current life. Because of their anonymous priestly self-disclosures about their sexual histories and their understanding of the meaning of celibacy, I decided to follow up my doctoral dissertation findings with a research project focusing on priestly genital-sexual activity.

      Given the premise that many priests acknowledge the practice of some form of sexual activity in their celibate lives, I have been motivated to reflect on how I believe the God of mercy and compassion interfaces with the reality of priestly celibacy. As a result, I have contemplated the meaning, practice, and significance of celibacy. I have concluded, based on the findings from my doctoral research and the follow-up survey, that there are as many different definitions of celibacy as there are priests, at least the sample I studied. Since the reality is that there are varying degrees of the understanding of celibacy, I suggest that the church consider alternative models that not only recognize the reality of the sexual activity of Roman Catholic priests but also recognize both a traditional (sexual abstinence) and a contemporary (sexually active) definition of celibacy. The integrity of Catholic clergy and their fidelity to their promise of celibacy can only be sustained if we, as a church, cease to long for what it once meant or insist on what we think it should be but instead embrace the reality that a significant number of priests are indeed sexually active.

      Much to his credit, Franciscan friar Father Michael Crosby (1996), in his book Celibacy, acknowledges the reality that Roman Catholic priests and religious are sexually active.

      Genital gratification or acting-out also involves much of the way priests and religious spend their free time. Many know just what they will do sexually or genitally during leisure time, on days off, when they visit a city far-enough-away from where they may work, or go on a vacation. In these situations, a person’s thoughts and planning often get oriented to ways they can seek sexual or genital release. Sometimes we do this secretly; other times it is a matter of public knowledge. I once lived with a friar whom everyone knew went to pornographic movies on his day off. Others share among themselves where the gay cruising bars can be found in the nearest big city or where female prostitutes congregate. For those returning from outings, the code seems to be: If you don’t ask, I don’t need to tell."

      In one of the places where I lived in the 80s, there were many seminaries. I myself lived in a house of formation while there. At various times the seminarians would have parties, mainly feted at the houses of the various religious orders. One of the new brothers at our house had been told for weeks to look forward to his initiation into the party scene. When he finally did go, he discovered twenty to thirty seminarians all over the place. In every room something was going on. Wherever he went in the religious house he found at least some of the male seminarians kissing and embracing each other or some female guest. I was given the distinct impression, he told me, that, if I chose to remain, new levels would be available to me. (Crosby 1996, 134)

      The goal of Sex, Celibacy, and Priesthood is to illustrate the difference between the public perception of what it means to be celibate and the private reality of sexual identity and sexual activity as Roman Catholic priests. The most intriguing and provocative portions of my research are the anonymous written responses from priests as they describe, often in intimate detail, their understanding of celibate chastity and conflicts, if any, between their celibate priesthood, sexual orientation, and sexual behaviors.

      Finally, my observations and comments about celibacy will likely rattle the status quo of the Roman Catholic Church. There is little doubt in my mind that religious authorities, scholars, and lay Catholic apologists will circle the wagons and attempt to deny, discredit, or dismiss my observations. If only because I am a former vowed Roman Catholic religious who was received into and exercised ordained public ministry within the Old Catholic faith only to eventually reconcile with the Roman Catholic Church, many of my critics may believe they have sufficient grounds to assert that I have an ax to grind. I do not. Others will be quick to point out that Old Catholics are not in full communion with the Roman Catholic Church and, therefore, should not comment on Roman internal affairs. Many adversaries will rush to judgment and condemn the priests who were honest enough to share their sexual histories. I strongly encourage harsh critics and those who rush to judgment

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