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    Eric: A Discworld Novel
    Eric: A Discworld Novel
    Eric: A Discworld Novel
    Ebook168 pages2 hours

    Eric: A Discworld Novel

    By Terry Pratchett

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    About this ebook

    “Pratchett’s humor is international, satirical, devious, knowing, irreverent, unsparing, and above all, funny.” —Kirkus Reviews

    Determined to create a wish granting demon, an inept young demonologist instead conjures the Discworld’s most incompetent wizard in this devilishly humorous adventure in Sir Terry Pratchett’s internationally bestselling fantasy series.

    Discworld’s only demonology hacker, Eric, is about to make life very difficult for the rest of Ankh-Morpork’s denizens. This would-be Faust is very bad . . . at his work, that is. All he wants is to fulfill three little wishes: to live forever, to be master of the universe, and to have the woman of his dreams fall for him.

    But Eric’s desires are much greater than his talents. Instead of a powerful demon, he summons the infamous Rincewind, a wizard whose incompetence is rivaled only by Eric’s. As if that wasn’t bad enough, that lovable sharp-toothed travel accessory the Luggage has arrived, too. With friends like these, there’s only one thing Eric wishes for now—that he'd never been born.

    The Discworld novels can be read in any order but Eric is the fourth book in Wizards series. The full collection includes:

    • The Color of Magic
    • The Light Fantastic
    • Sourcery
    • Eric
    • Interesting Times
    • The Last Continent
    • Unseen Academicals
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherHarperCollins
    Release dateOct 13, 2009
    ISBN9780061807039
    Eric: A Discworld Novel
    Author

    Terry Pratchett

    Terry Pratchett (1948–2015) was the acclaimed creator of the globally revered Discworld series. In all, he authored more than fifty bestselling books, which have sold more than one hundred million copies worldwide. His novels have been widely adapted for stage and screen, and he was the winner of multiple prizes, including the Carnegie Medal. He was awarded a knighthood by Queen Elizabeth II for his services to literature in 2009, although he always wryly maintained that his greatest service to literature was to avoid writing any.

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    Reviews for Eric

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    • 3/5
      Eric is Discworld's only demonology hacker. All he wants is three wishes granted: the mastery of all kingdoms, to meet the most beautiful woman who ever existed, and to live forever. Unfortunately, instead of a powerful demon he conjures...Rincewind. Eric is disappointed as Rincewind tells him he is unable to create any of these things. It's not like he can actually make things happen at the snap of his fingers.Eric is the parody retelling of Faust, Discworld style. Eric picks up right where Sourcery leaves of, with Rincewind stuck in the Dungeon Dimensions. The story is a quick, fun read with a great anti-hero in Rincewind. Pratchett humorously explores the idea of evil and that demons can learn from us humans (the concept of paperwork, for instance) as well as poking fun at a bit of history.
    • 3/5
       Brings back Rincewind, the wizzard, who was last seen being trapped in the Dungeon Dimensions after saving the world with a half brick in a sock (Sourcery). The Eric of the title is a demonologist, trying to summon demons to do his will. As he's a 13 yr old boy, his wishes are fairly simple; to rule the world, to meet the most beautiful woman and to live for ever. Due to a strange alignment of circumstances, Rincewind appears in the magic circle instead of the usual demon. As usual, the wishes are fulfilled completely, but in such a way as to make the recipient wish he hadn't wished for them at all! Makes for an enjoyable ride
    • 3/5
      A retelling of the classic Faust story in the form and style of a Discworld novel. Or rather a short story blown to novel proportions. With some careful prodding by a demon, Rincewind the most unfortunate wizard ever, finds himself dumped within a summoning circle. Young Eric now that he has in fact summoned a demon instead of a rather useless almost-wizard. Both Eric and Rincewind find themselves jostled around the disc and space-time as they become the leverage in not so subtle demon politics.At times the format feels a bit forced, as if some of the corners of the bed sheet were tucked in hastily before the bed was completely made. Since most Rincewind stories are a collection of unfortunate run-ins and run-aways it all sort of works well together and as every other Discworld story is amusing and entertaining. All in all a pleasant but very brief experience, which would have fitted better amongst other short stories.
    • 5/5
      The book was short, but again i couldn't put it down, hence reading the whole thing in a day! Spoiler** I wondered how Terry was going to bring Rincewind back into the picture and here was a fantastic way of doing just that.
    • 3/5
      This was my first taste of Terry Pratchett and in all fairness, based on other reviews, probably not the best example of his work. While I found the humour pretty funny the story was sadly lacking. It felt more like a sketch show than a proper novel.
    • 4/5
      Powered through this one in three days. As ever, the Discworld characters are a hoot to read about and this had me giggling through much of the story for one reason or the other.Good to see Rincewind is finally out of the Dungeon Dimensions again, though what he’s been dragged into isn’t much better. Eric, a 13-year-old demonologist, is cute in his naivety about the wider world. Yet he still insists on his three wishes and what happens next is just hilarious.First we get him wanting to be ruler of the world: Which ends in a run-in with Terry’s take on Aztecs and their end-of-the-world-mythology. And there’s a little imp ... named Quezovercoatl. ^_^Next is wanting to meet the most beautiful woman in the world: This has us landing smack in the battle for Pseudopolis (Discworld’s Troy, wooden horse and all). He gets quite a shock there, the world’s more beautiful woman is a mother of seven as well. Though I still wasn’t sure how that no longer made her beautiful. -_-Lastly, living forever: Failure to mention “from this point on” get them flung back to the beginning of time. There’s an upside to that, at least I thought it was, they got to meet the creator. And, according to one small paragraph, life started from an egg and cress sandwich. (How weird would that be for it to have been right? LOL!)But even then, their adventure isn’t finished. After entering hell, where the eternal punishment is bored, they must come head-to-horns with Astfgl (seriously how does one pronounce that?). But the ending does seem to get a little muddled but in an ‘omg, I can’t believe that just happened’ kind of way.Still, there seemed to be something missing from this. As if the ending was wrapped up a little too fast. Ah well, onto Moving Pictures.
    • 3/5
      Enjoyed this one - it was a nice quick read.Liked seeing Rincewind again and liked the character of Eric.Glad I read Doctor Faustus a couple of years ago. It meant I was able to appreciate the story.Liked the demons - took me a while to notice Quezovercoatl's name. ^_^
    • 4/5
      (Faust) Eric by Terry Pratchett There is a world that is carried through space on the back of four great Elephants who stand on the back of a giant turtle who is swimming through space with an unknown destination. This world is shaped as a disk, a round circle peppered with mountains across its center (know as the hub), and great waterfalls that crash over the edge and shower the elephants below. Rincewind is a Wizard, he even has a hat that says so. He also has a way of getting stuck in the middle of things he'd much rather have nothing to do with. Through miss-adventure he ended up stuck in the Dungeon Dimensions (see my review of Sorcery). Eric is a demonologist, he may be only 13 and may be less demonoligist more lucky. After studying his grand father's books he opens a door to the Dungeon Dimensions and summons a Demon... well... Rincewind (though the Luggage is thought of by many as a Demon...). Eric demands that his demon grant him three wishes and even though Rincewind tells him its not possible it seems to work. Well... as well as any wish granted by a demon would work that is.... The disworld books are written in a different formant, there aren't any chapters, which other than not giving me a place to stop reading when I need to sleep doesn't really change much. I also like how even though this is one story that is part of a 38 book serous (and even though it directly takes place after another book) it doesn't matter one bit when you read it in relation to the other books. This can be said of every one of the disk world books. Each story you read developed the world more and more in my head, but none of them go in to extensive details about things that happened before (boring you if you have read it). It really doesn't matter to your understanding of the current story. Rincwind is very bothered by the laws of Nature that the world he lives on doesn't follow. He sometimes wishes that the world was a nice sphere shape with a center of liquid rock.... but the world just doesn't work like that.
    • 4/5
      Almost a short story, based almost solely on three wishes goes wrong. And it provides a mechanism to rescue from the Dungeon Dimensions that he'd been trapped in during his last installment. I'm not sure that Hell was a great improvement.Sort of funny. It is, maybe, one of the first books that begins to show pTerry / Discworld's warped sense of 'logical'. Our young deononlogist, Eric, captures Rincewind out of the Dungeon Dimensions. He demands of Rincewind three standard wishes - to live forever, to meet the most beautiful woman in the world, and rule the world. Rincewind denies any ability - but due to the macinations currently happening in Hell, he has the ability to grant wishes. Eric is transported to the formation of the world, in order to live forever, to some unhappy tribes, not pleased with the current ruler's choices, and to a happily married, aging mother of 7 - once the most beautiful woman in the world.Its all slightly amusing. The machinations of Hell provide a much greater (if only a minor plot) opportunity for humour. Demons have little imagination, and their new King has been learning from humans. For example before a dammed soul can attempt to puch a retriculant boulder up a hill it first has to read the entire commentry and Health and Safety regulations relating to the lifting of heavy objects - all 1000+ volumes of them.As can be seen pTerry is starting to get into his main stride, and from here onwards in the series, the commentry on modern human existance becomes ever more pointed.
    • 4/5
      On the surface a silly story but by the end of it you can see the satire. Pratchett takes a wonderfully funny swipe at the methods of modern management, religion and human's ability to be cruel to each other. There is also a bit of historical satire in this one too which keeps you entertained right through the book. It also helps that the hapless Rincewind is back with the Luggage.
    • 4/5
      A nice small dose of Pratchett. Enough to keep me going until the next one. Not the best but definitely worth a look.
    • 3/5
      A lot shorter than ther other Discworld books, but packs in easily as many laughs. An amusing take on 'Faust'.
    • 4/5
      I'm reading the Discworld series chronologically, and I think Eric is one of the best (together with Mort) so far!
    • 2/5
      I just could not get into this one at all. I typically love Rincewind stories, but I couldn't find myself paying attention to this story at all. Everytime I picked it up my wand continually wandered, unamused. Even my favorite character, the luggage, couldn't get me to rate this any higher.
    • 4/5
      Eric reads more like a short story to me rather than a full novel. It's pretty light on plot, and very quick to read, but if you like Rincewind you'll enjoy it.
    • 4/5
      One of the quickest reads in Discworld, but also one of the best. It is back to Rincewind the Wizzard and the puns are fast and furious. Hell is something from Dilbert, and beyond horrible.
    • 5/5
      Rincewind is mistaken for a devil by an amateur demonologist, who insists on having his three wishes granted.This hat-tip to Faust and Dante's Inferno (via the Trojan Wars, Creation and management techniques) is probably my favourite Rincewind story, although other reviews and ratings suggest that's not the majority opinion. There are some wonderful cameos from Death and some superb one-liners, and although it doesn't have the depth of some of his longer works it is very funny.
    • 4/5
      A cute, short book. It starts off very strong - with Rincewind summoned, mistaken for a demon, and forced to grant the summoner three wishes - but doesn't really go anywhere interesting. It's a nice little diversion from the usual end-of-the-world formula of Discworld books, though.
    • 4/5
      I loved The Color of Magic, book #1 of the Discworld series. It was everything I want in a book, with humor and silly puns and delightful characters. Then I began to wait and wait and wait. I felt compelled (yes, I'm a bit anal) to read book #2 next. Today I could wait no longer. I dove into Eric and took a trip to Hell, climbed out of the Trojan Horse, and chit-chatted with a (not "the") Creator. Clever stuff. Ah, but I must be off. Mort awaits.
    • 4/5
      You were worried that we were never going to see Rincewind again, weren't you? That's okay, so was I. He's not out of trouble though. Never, that would be unlike Rincewind. This time he's called from the dungeon dimension by the Discworld's first hacker demonologist, Eric. He is a teenager with his acne and dreams of adoration and power--provided that everything continues to work properly. Of course, they will not, but kids can have their dreams--until they end up in Hell with the King of the Demon's on their tail. Hell, they find is rather unlike what they had expected. Will Eric make it back home to relax and put to bed his childish dreams of ruling the world consequence free? Will Rincewind manage to get out?
    • 4/5
      What do you get when you combine a spotty teenager with a magic circle, the denizens of Hell, Luggage, and a wizard whose main claim to fame is his ability to run away (successfully)? Vintage Pratchett, that's what!This re-imagining of Faust is a fast, wild ride. Love that Luggage!
    • 3/5
      A Discworld novel featuring the wizard Rincewind and his Luggage. Quite a lightweight story, in which Rincewind is accidentally entrapped by the boy Eric who was attempting to summon the demons of Hell. Together Rincewind and Eric travel through time and space, pursued by demons. They visit Discworld's equivalent of the Aztecs, narrowly escaping a ritual sacrifice, and the battle of Troy, where they meet Rincewind's ancestor. The parallels with Goethe's "Faust" are reasonably clear but "Eric" lacks the angst of the original. An amusing romp.
    • 3/5
      A bit of a light runaround adventure for Rincewind, and has nowhere near the depth of other Discworld novels. Remided me very much of the first one, "The Colour Of Magic". Some very good gags though.
    • 4/5
      Featuring Rincewind and lampooning Faust, this is packed with jokes. The plot moves along at a fair clip and is engaging. Sadly the book itself is rather short.
    • 5/5
      Through a million to one chance Rincewind manages to escape the Dungeon Dimensions and finds himself under the control of Eric, a teenage-Demonologist. Eric's only desires are to be ruler of the disc, have the most beautiful woman and live forever. No one is more amazed than Rincewind himself when the wishes seem to get fulfilled, however, with unexpected side-effects...Pratchett delivers as always a fantastic story taking dozens of jibes at world history such as the Trojan War or modern Management methods. Even though the book is short (by Terry's standards) it is very fast paced and never gets boring :).
    • 5/5
      An excellent retelling of Faust + some extras. Very very funny.
    • 3/5
      More history gets skewered in this quick book about Rincwind getting involved in demonology, time travel, and a kid in puberty with an over-active imagination.Pratchett pokes fun at the Trojan War, creation, and management techniques of the 80's.
    • 4/5
      Terry Pratchett is a god who walks among men. The entire Discworld series is a joy and only a strange mad creature cursed by gods and man would refuse to read and love these books!Not my favoruite Rincewind story but still worth ten of most other options
    • 3/5
      “Eric” is a bit light even by Discworld standards. By word count it is almost certainly a novella. Still, as with all of Pratchett’s work it’s good for a giggle; for me personally it was perfect at the time – much needed comic relief after the dark world of “The Iron Dragon’s Daughter.”In “Eric,” we hook back up with Rincewind the incompetent sorcerer and expert running-away man. After leaving him somewhere exotic in the aftermath of the explosively magical events of “Sourcery,” he’s now been summoned by a 14-year old deomonologist (the eponymous Eric) who demands that Rincewind grant him three wishes.And hijinks ensue. After all, the purpose of demons granting wishes is not to make the wisher happy. Everything has unintended consequences; usually in this case, very amusing ones. Did I mention that the Luggage is back as well? It’s pretty cranky to say the least.There’s nothing Earth (or Disc) shattering here; the best bits involve the bureaucratic re-organization of Hell along modern management principles. It’s Pratchett does Dilbert a few years before Scott Adams quit his day job. Read and enjoy!
    • 5/5
      Fantastic Faust parody!

    Book preview

    Eric - Terry Pratchett

    Introducing Discworld®

    The Discworld is a world not totally unlike our own, except that it is flat, sits on the backs of four elephants who hurtle through space balanced on a giant turtle, and magic is as integral as gravity to the way it works. Though some of its inhabitants are witches, dwarfs, wizards and even policemen, their stories are fundamentally about people being people.

    The Discworld novels can be read in any order, but the Wizards series is a good place to start.

    DISCWORLD NOVELS STARRING THE WIZARDS

    The Color of Magic

    The Light Fantastic

    Sourcery

    Eric

    Interesting Times

    The Last Continent

    Unseen Academicals

    A full list of the Discworld novels in order can be found at the end of this book.

    Contents

    Cover

    Title Page

    Introducing Discworld®

    Eric

    The Discworld Novels

    About the Author

    Books by Terry Pratchett

    Copyright

    About the Publisher

    Eric

    THE BEES OF DEATH are big and black, they buzz low and somber, they keep their honey in combs of wax as white as altar candles. The honey is black as night, thick as sin and sweet as treacle.

    It is well known that eight colors make up white. But there are also eight colors of blackness, for those that have the seeing of them, and the hives of Death are among the black grass in the black orchard under the black-blossomed, ancient boughs of trees that will, eventually, produce apples that . . . put it like this . . . probably won’t be red.

    The grass was short now. The scythe that had done the work leaned against the gnarled bole of a pear tree. Now Death was inspecting his bees, gently lifting the combs in his skeletal fingers.

    A few bees buzzed around him. Like all beekeepers, Death wore a veil. It wasn’t that he had anything to sting, but sometimes a bee would get inside his skull and buzz around and give him a headache.

    As he held a comb up to the gray light of his little world between the realities there was the faintest of tremors. A hum went up from the hive, a leaf floated down. A wisp of wind blew for a moment through the orchard, and that was the most uncanny thing, because the air in the land of Death is always warm and still.

    Death fancied that he heard, very briefly, the sound of running feet and a voice saying, no, a voice thinking oshitoshitoshit, I’m gonna die I’m gonna die I’m gonna DIE!

    Death is almost the oldest creature in the universe, with habits and modes of thought that mortal man cannot begin to understand, but because he was also a good beekeeper he carefully replaced the comb in its rack and put the lid on the hive before reacting.

    He strode back through the dark garden to his cottage, removed the veil, carefully dislodged a few bees who had got lost in the depths of his cranium, and retired to his study.

    As he sat down at his desk there was another rush of wind, which rattled the hourglasses on the shelves and made the big pendulum clock in the hall pause ever so briefly in its interminable task of slicing time into manageable bits.

    Death sighed, and focused his gaze.

    There is nowhere Death will not go, no matter how distant and dangerous. In fact the more dangerous it is, the more likely he is to be there already.

    Now he stared through the mists of time and space.

    OH, he said. IT’S HIM.

    It was a hot afternoon in late summer in Ankh-Morpork, normally the most thriving, bustling and above all the most crowded city on the Disc. Now the spears of the sun had achieved what innumerable invaders, several civil wars and the curfew law had never achieved. It had pacified the place.

    Dogs lay panting in the scalding shade. The river Ankh, which never what you might call sparkled, oozed between its banks as if the heat had sucked all the spirit out of it. The streets were empty, oven-brick hot.

    No enemies had ever taken Ankh-Morpork. Well, technically they had, quite often; the city welcomed free-spending barbarian invaders, but somehow the puzzled raiders always found, after a few days, that they didn’t own their own horses anymore, and within a couple of months they were just another minority group with its own graffiti and food shops.

    But the heat had besieged the city and triumphed over the walls. It lay over the trembling streets like a shroud. Under the blowlamp of the sun assassins were too tired to kill. It turned thieves honest. In the ivy-covered fastness of Unseen University, premier college of wizardry, the inmates dozed with their pointy hats over their faces. Even bluebottles were too exhausted to bang against windowpanes. The city siesta’d, awaiting the sunset and the brief, hot, velvet surcease of the night.

    Only the Librarian was cool. He was also swinging and hanging out.

    This was because he’d rigged up a few ropes and rings in one of the sub-basements of the Unseen University Library—the one where they kept the, um, erotic* books. In vats of crushed ice. And he was dreamily dangling in the chilly vapor above them.

    All books of magic have a life of their own. Some of the really energetic ones can’t simply be chained to the bookshelves; they have to be nailed shut or kept between steel plates. Or, in the case of the volumes on tantric sex magic for the serious connoisseur, kept under very cold water to stop them from bursting into flames and scorching their severely plain covers.

    The Librarian swung gently back and forth above the seething vats, dozing peacefully.

    Then the footsteps came out of nowhere, raced across the floor with a noise that scraped the raw surface of the soul, and disappeared through the wall. There was a faint, distant scream that sounded like ogodsogodsogods, this is IT, I’m gonna DIE.

    The Librarian woke up, lost his grip, and flopped into the few inches of tepid water that was all that stood between The Joy of Tantric Sex with Illustrations for the Advanced Student, by A Lady, and spontaneous combustion.

    And it would have gone badly for him if the Librarian had been a human being. Fortunately, he was currently an orang-utan. With so much raw magic sloshing around in the Library it would be surprising if accidents did not happen sometimes, and one particularly impressive one had turned him into an ape. Not many people get the chance to leave the human race while still alive, and he’d strenuously resisted all efforts since to turn him back. Since he was the only librarian in the universe who could pick up books with his feet, the University hadn’t pressed the point.

    It also meant that his idea of desirable female companionship now looked something like a sack of butter thrown through a roll of old inner tubes, and so he was lucky to get away with only mild burns, a headache, and some rather ambivalent feelings about cucumbers, which wore off by teatime.

    In the Library above, the grimoires creaked and rustled their pages in astonishment as the invisible runner passed straight through the bookshelves and disappeared, or rather, disappeared even more . . .

    Ankh-Morpork gradually awoke from its slumber. Something invisible and yelling at the top of its voice was passing through every part of the city, dragging in its wake a trail of destruction. Wherever it went, things changed.

    A fortune-teller in the Street of Cunning Artificers heard the footsteps run across her bedroom floor and found her crystal ball had turned into a little glass sphere with a cottage in it, plus snowflakes.

    In a quiet corner of the Mended Drum tavern, where the adventuresses Herrena the Henna-Haired Harridan, Red Scharron and Diome, Witch of the Night, were meeting for some girl talk and a game of canasta, all the drinks turned into small yellow elephants.

    It’s them wizards up at the University, said the barman, hastily replacing the glasses. It oughtn’t to be allowed.

    Midnight dropped off the clock.

    The Council of Wizardry rubbed their eyes and stared blearily at one another. They felt it oughtn’t to be allowed too, especially since they weren’t the ones that were allowing it.

    Finally the new Archchancellor, Ezrolith Churn, suppressed a yawn, sat up straight in his chair, and tried to look suitably magisterial. He knew he wasn’t really Archchancellor material. He hadn’t really wanted the job. He was ninety-eight, and had achieved this worthwhile age by carefully not being any trouble or threat to anyone. He had hoped to spend his twilight years completing his seven-volume treatise on Some Little Known Aspects of Kuian Rain-making Rituals, which were an ideal subject for academic study in his opinion since the rituals only ever worked in Ku, and that particular continent had slipped into the ocean several thousand years ago.* The trouble was that in recent years the lifespan of Archchancellors seemed to be a bit on the short side, and the natural ambition of all wizards for the job had given way to a curious, self-effacing politeness. He’d come down one morning to find everyone calling him sir. It had taken him days to find out why.

    His head ached. He felt it was several weeks past his bedtime. But he had to say something.

    Gentlemen— he began.

    Oook.

    "Sorry, and mo—"

    Oook.

    I mean apes, of course—

    Oook.

    The Archchancellor opened and shut his mouth in silence for a while, trying to re-route his train of thought. The Librarian was, ex officio, a member of the college council. No one had been able to find any rule about orang-utans being barred, although they had surreptitiously looked very hard for one.

    It’s a haunting, he ventured. Some sort of a ghost, maybe. A bell, book and candle job.

    The Bursar sighed. We tried that, Archchancellor.

    The Archchancellor leaned toward him.

    Eh? he said.

    "I said, we tried that, Archchancellor, said the Bursar loudly, directing his voice at the old man’s ear. After dinner, you remember? We used Humptemper’s Names of the Ants and rang Old Tom."*

    Did we, indeed. Worked, did it?

    "No, Archchancellor."

    Eh?

    Anyway, we’ve never had any trouble with ghosts before, said the Senior Tutor. "Wizards

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